21/02/2014 The Film Review

Wayne Rooney becomes the highest-paid Premier League player

in history. Now it is time for the Film Review.

Hello and welcome to the Film Review. To take us through this

weeks cinema releases, Jason Solomons. I have blood, sweat, sex

and tears. Only Lovers Left Alive and vampires. Then we are on a

summer holiday in France, a gay holiday. Then also Nymphomaniac. I

am wondering what clips you are about to show. It is not easy. Only

Lovers Left Alive, a vampire romance. Rarely have these films

being treated in the elitist, lush way that didn't Jarvis, -- Jim

Jarvis, where they live in eternal Twilight. I expect he is a bitterly

vampire himself. He returns here with a film will stop these vampires

Lipper ever. The vampires in question today -- live forever.

Tilda Swinton plays a vampire. She visits her lover at the rock stars

retreat. Talking of delicious, I have a surprise, an experiment. That

does not work by the way. Yes, it does. I plugged it in. What is that?

O negative. It is delicious. Blood on a stick. On a stick. Very

refreshing, especially when you are in a hot spot. Checkmate! I have a

problem with this. I have a number of problems with this. Tilda Swinton

always seems to be listening to herself when she is acting. It is

stylised and strange. There is no plot. I thought it was quite funny

and stylish. I like the way, vampires these days do not bite

people. They get their blood from hospitals and they sit it gently and

go into opiate it ecstasy like heroin addicts. All that is well

done. Then the film finishes. You have got to tell a story and bird

just is not one. If you are infuriated, you will be irritated by

the fact it does not take you anywhere. Where is the beef? Can you

say that about a vampire movie? His sister turns up at one point. She

seems to have fun. There is a nice line where she bites man and says,

it tasted rather horrible. He said, he is a music industry executive. He

is bound to taste bitter. I thought it could have been a fine movie with

work on the script. They talk about literature. They talk about Kit

Marlowe, a character played by John hurt. He talked about how he wrote

Hamlet. Almost these vampires who have been aesthetic throughout the

ages. It is about love. That is what keeps them alive, rather than

blood. It does not deal with that. It is happy with its own strength of

style. Stranger By The Lake, this one the best director prize. It is

just as graphic as the one last year but it is a homosexual film. I have

not seen this many genitalia ever, I think. It is a bit of a shock. If

you are not used to that sort of think if you have tears to shed, it

is a bit of a shock. If you are not used to that sort of think if you

have tears to shed, shed what develops is a thriller. His cruising

spot in the French countryside becomes a murder spot. Do be of

Freddie Mercury lookalikes! A terrible moustache. It is quite

poetic in the French manner. The lake looks great. And infect comes

along. There is a homosexual society. They do exist in an idyll

where sex and morality go out the window. There is a cross between

desire and last and danger. I think it is really clever and very well

done, very tense. If you can get over the fact that there are things

here that you're not used to seeing stop I have one but I am not used to

seeing them. The third one is Nymphomaniac. I wonder where you are

going with this. Is controversial. The director is controversial. I'm

not going to go into all the shenanigans that most of the films

tend to be about putting a woman at the centre of the drama and through

the ringer. That can be from breaking the waves, Mandalay did it.

Nicole Kidman as well. Do you like his films? I do not know. He is

trying to examine sexuality. It is an oddity of one girl called Jo and

her blossoming sexuality from when she was a child to when she was

about 50. Here is Stacy Martin on a train, having a bet about how many

people she can sleep with. What'll I do? Smile, make contact. What if it

does not work? You take them to another train and have sex with

them. What if it is nasty? Then you just think of the bag of chocolate

sweeties. You said he is an important artist.

A lot of people find him a self-important artist. This is quite

long. Is he anything but a provocative are? That is the

question. I thought this film was tawdry and airless. I thought it was

Dahl and poorly performed by everyone, even Charlotte

Gainsborough. I think it tries to intellectualise what sex can be from

a female point of view without understanding it at all. It looks

like everyone was having sex but no ones looked like they were really

having sex, well not the sex that I know and love. It was almost

impossible to watch. I do not know why you would put yourself through

it, why you would want to be in it, why you would want to make it. You

have seen the film, Shame. That is intellectualise it. He talks about

Bath. He is trying to intellectualise it. She has over

experience the world. There is a point but I did not get it. There is

a chance to see the two parts together. Next week comes out part

one and then part two. The best of the week is the Wolf of Wall Street.

I disagreed with Mark commode. I thought it was one of the best

films. No one is going to vote for it. This is the film I want to see.

I think Leonardo DiCaprio is brilliant. The way he addresses the

camera. It is the best thing that Martin Scorsese has done since

Casino. It is about American greed and corporate rot. This is about

greed. It is about real addiction to power, last, access to debauchery.

Your DVD is Captain Phillips. It is Tom Hanks at his best. Let's not

forget the best supporting actor winner. Tom Hanks should really be

the star. The guy really winning it is the Somalian guy. You begin to

understand why they behave like they do. It was a white knuckle ride. You

will find more film news and reviews on the website. That is it for this

week. Thank you for watching and goodbye.

A very good evening. The weekend is looking a little bit next. This

evening and overnight the will have a few showers around. It will be

relatively