13/02/2013 The One Show

Hello and welcome to the One Show with Alex Jones. And Matt Baker.

Tonight's guests have the gift of the gab. One talks a lot of sense

and the other just talks a lot. Luckily he's funny with it. It's

comedian turned dancer Tim Vine and Woman's Hour's dame Jenni Murray!

APPLAUSE You don't mean a turned a dancer,

do you? Have you? By Saturday, you'll be more of a dancer than a

comedian. My knees are just about holding out from the rehearsing.

I'm trying to save a bit of cartilage for Saturday night.

of the audience won't know you're talking part in Let's Dance for

Comic Relief. You're opening the show, so no pressure. I don't think

I am. Maybe they're keeping that a secret. I asked about that and I

said, please don't put me on first. You've got me worried now. We know

you have special moves up your sleeve judges by this high energy

It's hard to do backwards and forwards like that. I've always

fannied a go at. That how would you feel about bouncing around like

that? Nothing's real any more. You get CGI in the films and then

you're bouncing back-and-forth thanks to technology. There is no

way! No way I would attempt something like. That I'm with you.

I had my hips replaced a few years ago. I don't do that. Come on.

say nothing's real there's this power list which has been announced.

You kind of own this list. Were you slightly miffed that you couldn't

be part of it? No.... Yes! Clearly, Jane Garvey, who is the other

Woman's Hour presenter and I couldn't have been on it. Clare

Balding is in there and she's had a dabble. She appears talking about

sport. She's brilliant. You know, goodness, we needed somebody to

really push women's sport because we don't get enough coverage by

half. We'll talk more about that later on. There's a fantastic new

series that's just started on BBC One called Penguins - Spy In The

Huddle, where we see them as we never have before. They have

waddled into the studio and we're going to be meeting the stars of

the show later on and attempting our own version with no money, a

cuddly toy and thankfully, a very friendly zoo. Tim, to be honest

with you... That's like me dancing. Slightly quicker. It melts your

heart. I don't know if you saw it, but it is absolutely incredible. It

goes into incredible depth. When you see where they live, you

realise it's only the tip of the iceberg. Very good! It worked a

treat. Yes. As we know, Matt has tried but Tim here is the king of

the one liners. If you think you can do better, send in your one

liners to us and we'll read them out later. Tim will be judging them.

I didn't know that either. We have got an hour. Make them good. Now

the Prime Minister has promised the full intervention of the law will

be brought to bear for anyone who has passed off horsemeat as beef.

Labs carrying out DNA testing are working at full capacity.

Beefburgers manufactured for British and Irish supermarkets have

been found to contain traces of horsemeat... Products from Aldi,

Lidl and Iceland are also affected. How much horse is in the food we

eat? Around a thousand products are now being questioned by 28 local

authorities across the UK. They're taking DNA samples from processed

meat products. Do you do a general test for all kinds of DNA or do you

have to be very specific about what you're looking for? If you wanted

to find out everything that's say in a meat sample, you would be

testing and testing and testing. The testing we're doing is specific

to what you're looking for. That's the nature of DNA. If we were

looking for horse, we wouldn't detect donkey, zebra or anything

like. That it is that specific. DNA testing an expensive

discipline? All these tests cost money and it's a question of who

will pay. We're an official control laboratory. We generally act for

enforcement bodies. The amount of testing going on in food

enforcement is steadily declining. Really it's a Government issue.

There's nothing illegal about flogging a dead horse as long as

you know you're eelting it. -- eating it. It's the Food Standards

Agency's job to ensure we have confidence in what we eat. We live

in a time of budget cuts, is there enough money in the regulatory

system for things like the FSA to do an adequate job to police what's

going on? We give significant amounts of grants to local

authorities to carry out samples. We have a grant programme. We've

never run out of money in that programme. There's never been a

time when a local authority has said, "We've got a worry about this

and we'd like to test it." And then we've said we haven't got the money.

There are huge pressures particularly on local authority

colleagues, but this isn't a resource issue. It isn't a resource

issue but it feels like a lot of the testing is reactive rather than

proactive, as in responding to information that's coming in rather

than the spot checks that could have picked up what's clearly been

a chronic situation for quite a long time. At some level you could

test 100% of products coming onto the market. In fact, we have

required industry at the moment to check 100% of these kind of

products, but on an ongoing basis that is going to drive a lot of

cost in a time of austerity into the food chain. The British food

industry likes to claim it has full traceability of the food chain.

Does the consumer have reason to be confident that's the case? What we

are seeing is the incredible complexity of what we call the food

chain but is almost a food network. It is absolutely the responsibility

of the food industry, who make their profits by selling us food

products, to make sure those products are what they say on the

label. And they have to get into a position where they are confident

that the network or food chain they use to do that can be assured and

controlled. Even one produbgtd purporting to be beef and

containing a large amount of horse is completely unacceptable. Well,

Jay is here along with Tony Luckhurst, a butcher who has been

in the trade for 40 years. Doesn't seem so long. As that film suts,

supermarkets spend a lot of money on testing but that Trading

Standards should spent -- should spend more on spot tests.

Environmental Health budgets and Trading Standards budgets have been

cut by 32% in real terms. Last year the number of Environmental Health

enforcement notices were down 15%. Whether they should spend on it or

not, less is going into it. bods from the EU have been together.

Yes there was a big meeting today. The EU Commissioner for health and

consumer policy halls said this is fraudulent misuse of the labelling

system, it's not a food safety issue. He's said it must not "harm

the freedom of movement of goods across the EU". That's people

talking about stopping the imports of food from Europe. And Norway has

taken a bunch of Findus products off their shelves because they

believe there may be horsemeat in them. Is the scandal good news for

you as a butcher, have you seen a rise in customers? It's good news

for us in the short-term. People are more keen to know where their

meat is coming from. They can come to their local butcher and trust us.

We have a short supply chain. There's only three people involved,

including myself, in the supply of meat to us. Generally it's not good

news for the food or the meat trade. Can you just explain then where you

get your meat from. This week we've got beef from John and Steve within

whitby in Buckinghamshire. The meat goes to the abattoir and comes to

us. It's quite simple, very basic system. You can absolutely

guarantee where your meat is from? Every piece of meat has a passport

wh. It comes into the shop, we recognise it for what it is,

because we're skilled craftsmen. What about the people who say we

can't afford to buy from a local butcher. I would say apart from

coming to my shop, where we are keen on price, shop around. Find

somebody to trust and it's really not that expensive. What about you

two, has this changed your attitude towards what you'd buy in a

supermarket? We've got a very good local butcher. We know exactly

where his meat comes from. Yes, we have. Oh, not you and me. No, at

home. I'm sorry. I'm sure, I know I've eaten horse because I lived in

Paris for a year whi was a student. The French eat horse a lot. It

didn't really worry me too much. But what I worry about is not

knowing what's in it. And whether there are any veterinary drugs in

those horses. I have a question, are there more cows in this country

than horses? I would say definitely. If we ate horses it would be more

of a delicacy wouldn't St t? necessarily because we have a thing

about eating domestic animals that we use. It's because it's domestic.

If you know what you're eating there isn't so much of an issue. Is

there a case for saying these are the ingredients of this spag bol or

lasagne, you make up your mind. If you want to eat a bit of horse.

Down-the-line we may have a debate about what's in our food. Now we

have a lot of consumers with a right to expect big brand names

putting in their food what they thought they were putting in their

food. We know how tight money is and they've gone in thinking they

were getting deals and the fact is that those big retailers have let

them down by pushing margins so tightly that corners have been cut.

I have to say we tried to call, contact lots of retailers to talk

us, we contacted a dozen different organisations and none would give a

face-to-face interview. It comes down to education. You can go to a

butcher and say I have this budget, what can you give me for that and

you can help everybody. Don't be scared of us. We're nice guys.

We'll cut it there in front of you. If you chop a horse in half and

bang the two sides together, it's like somebody riding a coconut.

Morrisons did agree to talk to us, but we didn't have the chance to

get them on the air. It could be argued there's never

been a better time to go vegetarian and Jay's back later with the story

of a whole football club that's turned its back on meat. This week

a fantastic new series started on the BBC taking a unique look at the

life of penguins all around the world. We got to see the creatures

in a way we've never seen them before thanks to mini cameras

hidden inside dummy penguins and their eggs. The chicks can no

longer squeeze into their mother's pouch, even the experts can end

upped in trouble. -- end up in No-one can bathe in piece for more

It rolls like one too. With egg cam finally in his claws,

he does what comes naturally. He takes it into the air.

Egg cam captured the first aerial of a penguin colony shot by a

flying bird. Then it slips from his grasp. Immediately, it catches the

eye of a Turkey vulture. The game continues with different

Finally, egg cam is back in the rock hopper colony.

We're joined by the producer of the show John Downer and cameraman Jeff

Bell. They are lovely close up. Whuelz idea was it then? Whose idea

was it? It was the team. Every time we do a spy film, we've made eight

now. We have to come up with a way to get closer to the animals. Every

species is different. When we came up with the idea of penguins, we

thought how do we get into the penguin colony. We first came up

with this idea where we could actually have a penguin which was

taking the filming and could walk slowly around in the colony. This

the first time you've made a robotic animal. Yes, up till then

it was a rock or iceberg or something or other. But this was

actually going further than we'd been before. Geoff are you seen as

a cameraman or an expert as using remote control aeroplanes and cars?

For about 50 years I've been modelling and this is an extension

now. How did the penguins, the real ones, react when you placed the

Well, we hoped it would work, but we did not expect that they would

be so convinced by them, that we even had one trying to court the

egg cam. That kind of level of acceptance in the colony, we were

not expecting, but it allowed some spectacular footage. And how did

you get that footage? There is a radio picture coming back, but we

also record on board. It is not just penguin cams, but a lot of the

work is done by them. Some go under water as well. What did you find

out about penguins that we do not already know? Don Cowie always

think of them standing around in a group. Because we have filmed so

much, filming from the moment they come out of the water until the

chicks go back in, we've really got into their lives. People see them

as like us, because they look like us, they walk. But once you get in

their lives, you see they have got an emotional side which we can

really relate to. Again, that went further than we had anticipated.

Although you have done these different series with different

morals, the penguins have turned out to be your favourite? That's

right. You always say your favourite is what you are working

on, but these have really excelled themselves. They are absolutely

adorable. So, you have got this egg cam - how many of these did you

make? We had 10 in every colony, and we filmed three different types

of penguins. Then we had problems because birds would come along and

take them and carry them in the air. This was unbelievable. Obviously

they thought they were in for a treat. We lost quite a few which

were taken out to sea. Fortunately, in this sequence, we actually got

the egg cam back. I think we can confidently say, this is the first

aerial view taken by a bird. you imagine the producers sitting

around discussing this? Look at that! It is amazing. Yes, this was

a bird doing its own filming. that was a crane shot, it would

have been great! What is next, Jeff? I cannot say, he would shoot

me. But we are on another secret project. We are doing dolphins, but

we cannot talk about what we are doing. But again, we will be right

in there, like you have never seen. That will be going out at Christmas.

This one is Monday nights, isn't it? Yes. I never thought I would be

so emotional about penguins, but when that single penguin, trying to

find its... Oh, it is very sad. spent literally, well, several

minutes, trying to come up with our very own version of your wonderful

penguin cam, and we have set it up at Colchester Zoo, where we can

join Lucy at the moment. Yes, these are some 18 penguins in here. We

wanted to push the boundaries of science and national history --

natural history, so we have come up with our own penguin cam. It is not

universally popular with the residents in here. They have

attacked it a few times, but we will see how they get on later. One

of the early prototypes! I am just wondering why we did not use it!

Back in 1962, an underground army was mobilised across the UK to

prepare for the worst, as Russia and America squared up in the Cuban

missile crisis. Marty Jopson tells the story. In 1962, the Cuban

missile crisis brought the world to the brink of nuclear war. In the

the brink of nuclear war. In the event of the unthinkable, Britain

would have been a target for nuclear weapons, but we were

prepared. As this training film from 1962 illustrates, once the

Government would have taken control of the country from large bunkers

like this, and then they would have been reliant on information fed to

them from the front line. A little- known network of some 1,500

monitoring posts, dotted across the country. Should a nuclear attack

had been it didn't, each one of these would have been manned by

three or four part-time civilian volunteers -- imminent -- of the

Royal Observer Corps. Over 15,000 of them signed up to leave their

families behind and go down the hatch, if nuclear war was imminent.

There was always some speculation as to how many people would

actually turn up. I would like to think, because we were a

disciplined, uniformed body, that the majority of people would have

turned up for duty. And by using the same type of bunkers and

equipment featured in a training film, we are going to find out just

what that duty would have entailed. After first using this device like

this, using the telephone wires to connect this bunker to group

control and all of the nearby bunkers, the crew down here would

immediately turn to this device. This is the bomb power indicator,

which gives you a measure of the air pressure change caused by the

blast. Next, one crew member would have gone to collect a bleeding

from the Ground Zero indicator, a device which records the strength

and direction of the blast onto photographic paper. Lawrence Holmes

has brought one of the very pieces of paper used. In the absence of a

nuclear blast, we are using a photographer's flashgun instead.

And we are firing at 400 times, to try and match the brightness of

just one nuclear blast. Here we go. If I take the photographic paper

out, there it is. That's what a bomb blast would look like. The

position of the mark on the Grid revealed that bearing and height of

the blast. But with the telephone line now is can they tick, -- now

disconnected, we are resorting to the modern equivalent to relay the

information up the command chain. Clear. Here at group control, Brian

would have received these types of reports from many of the monitoring

posts under his command. What was all but about? That was to allow us

to use this instrument here, to draw a line of the right bearing.

We would then do that on other posts, and on the third one, we

would get the Ground Zero of the bomb. With the Ground Zero located,

the direction of radioactive fall- out could then be predicted, and

the public could be warned by the Observer's back in their monitoring

posts. Thankfully, Lawrence Holmes never had to set off the alarm. In

training, they only used dummies, but not this time. Go for it.

The Royal Observer Corps was stood down in the 1990s, and never needed

to fire this warning signal. Today, only a handful of the bunkers

remain intact. I never heard that before. It is difficult to imagine

a contemporary Volunteer Force with such responsibility. There could be

company directors, plumbers, farmers, once we put that uniform

on, we were members of the Royal Observer Corps. Those who were

prepared to leave their families behind in the hope of contributing

to the survival of at least some of the British population. It was the

best way and I could find to help my family in those circumstances.

After seeing these volunteers reliving the roles they might have

played, it is sobering to realise how real that threat was, and how

we were forced to prepare for the worst. Well, thanks, Marty Jopson.

In the 1960s, there was a lot of paranoia about a possible nuclear

fall-out. I was 12, in 1962, and I can remember kneeling by the side

of my bed, alongside my mother, saying, please God, do not let Mr

Khrushchev blow us away. We were really, really frightened about it.

People were talking about what you would do if a nuclear bomb came.

You would put sandbags in front of the house. Pretty sure that would

not work. You would use what you had a round. That was the advice,

hide under the table. My dad said something very rude about putting

your head between your knees. Thankfully it is not something we

have to worry about these days. As we said at the top of the show,

Woman's Hour revealed its poll of the 100 most powerful women in the

country. The Queen was a late entry, we were surprised to find out...

The panel, who judged it, were trying to think, does she have real

power? They debated it and they debated it, real power, does she

actually really influence what happens in this country? And in the

end, they decided, yes, if you meet the Prime Minister every week, you

know exactly what is going on. And what I loved about the fact that

she was there, as you get older, you start to look at what life is

going to be like when you get really quite old, and there is the

Queen at 86, and I have met her a couple of times, and she is amazing.

When you watched her on the river, doing the Jubilee, just standing

there, and it gives us all hope. 86, she can cope with that. It is that

interesting thing about how you define power. It is a difficult one.

I think what the panel in the end went for was what they called Hard

power, rather than soft power. Theresa May is number two, the Home

Secretary, she clearly has power over people's lives. And then, I

have got a list, thank goodness, to remind me. Otherwise I would not

have remembered all of them! But you know, the chief executive of

Santander, a very successful bank, Ana Botin, she is third on the list.

And then we have got judges... What is really encouraging about it is

that there are a lot of very powerful women now in this country.

Not enough, I might say, we have to remember still that Members of

Parliament are outnumbered four men to one woman, still. So, we can do

better. And the interesting thing is, you were talking about soft

power, because of course we have got the comedian Sarah Millican,

people like Adele, but I was surprised that the Duchess of

Cambridge did not fall into that bracket, because a lot of women

will see her as very influential, and has a great role model. I think

that caused a lot of debate for the panel as well - should she be

included? The conclusion was that she is new to the job, she is very

young, she needs more experience. I'm sure in another four or five

years' time, yes. Is this going to be done every year? I hope so,

because it is really interesting. It makes you wonder why it has not

been done before. I know, why did we not think that before? Who was

your role model, Tim? I used to like Elvis Presley when I was

growing up. Does that count? does. He has always been my hero.

Is that a clue as to what you're doing on Saturday night? I am not

doing Elvis Presley. But that would be inside my comfort zone. It

turned out they could not use the moves which I liked in any dance.

Our next guest used to be a policeman. We want you to try and

work out from this line-up who it could possibly be. A clue, he also

played rugby for England. And also, he was Hagrid's double in the Harry

Potter films. And so we go! And he has been on a case for us about the

unique prints left at crime scenes, but not from fingers...

The force of a bullet can destroy anything in its path - very often,

the bullet itself. Scientists are now able to detect the smallest

clues from ammunition recovered from the scene of a crime. When a

gun is fired, the bullet is scored with a unique pattern, one which

will only matched the gun it came from. Here at the National

Ballistics Intelligence Service, these patterns can be matched with

precision. Take two identical hand guns, both made in the same factory,

but can they tell them apart? A bit of a Mexican stand-off here,

fortunately they are not loaded, but to me, these look identical.

But you can tell the difference? How do you do that? When the guns

are manufactured, there are unique markings left on them. They are

identical in every respect to the naked eye, but when we test fired

the bullets, you can see differences. To make sure the

Bullets stay intact, they are fired into water, slowing them down. Both

looked identical to me, but under a high-powered microscope, minute

differences are revealed. I can see the images of each bullet... If you

focus that one on the right, you can see they are quite considerably

different. Even me with my Grade C in physics O-level, I can see they

are different. But how would two bullets from the same gun compare?

So, this is fired from the same weapon. That is leaping out of the

screen, that it is a match. Just like matching fingerprints, his

ability to link bullets enables the police to see if a gun has been

used before. They can even trace a weapon back to its original buyer.

Liverpool, 2010. Police received intelligence that illegal guns were

for sale in the area. Under cover, they were able to obtain three

clock hand guns, but had no idea They originated in America. The

Americans started an investigation. Enster Steven Greenhoe, eczema reen

and supposedly a former bodyguard to top Hollywood stars. He was

buying guns over the counter, dismantling them and smuggling the

parts into the UK in his suitcase. When detectives followed him in the

US, they were led to a landfill site, where they made a crucial

discovery. The former bodyguard had been dumping empty gun cases and

vital clues, spent ammunition from the guns he had sold. These rounds

from America were scanned into the UK's database. After months of

meticulous detective work they had a major breakthrough. Bullets found

at a drive-by shooting in this area of Manchester matched one of the

rounds from the US landfill. It was starting to find more evidence of

the guns. The fact this we have a number of bullets that the

Americans have recovered for us and it's on that national database

gives us the ability to match those guns. Greenhoe was arrested and

found with a new Arsenal destined for Britain. He's been jailed for

ten years. Police believe 50 of his guns are still somewhere in the UK.

What's more, some of them have been used several times. We've seen one

of those weapons used 11 times. times, what are the chances that

it's one person using that gun 11 times or is it being shared around?

Weons we know are passed around. Sometimes they're even rented. This

system here is closing the net in on those rogue weapons that are out

there. You're starting to see where they're used. You're building a

hard intelligence picture of what's out there. With every shooting the

database is updated making new links with guns and ultimately

helping to reduce the number of firearms on our streets.

Martin, it's fascinating stuff that they're doing there. You talk about

closing the net. What effect is it having on British gun crime? It had

an immediate effect in its first year. It was linked to 350 crimes

linking guns to specific crimes. Since 2005 gun crime has dropped by

45%. Last year it dropped by 16%. What's crucial, talking about

Greenhoe from America, is that it's also cutting out the armers. We're

not awash with guns as the US is. But there's an Arsenal of guns

which is being handed around, rented out and used. By being able

to match ballistics with the weapons they can make a direct

match or have a record which will sit there and wait to come in again.

What they had in the past, it had to be a Freedom of Information Act,

application to get that stuff. Now police forces around the world can

log into this database and get the information they need. It's crucial.

And you're a reporter now on Crimewatch. I am. How has that

changed your perspective on crime compared to when you were on the

force in Bedfordshire. It's 18 years since I was a police officer.

The police has changed enormously. Technology is the biggest change.

What it reinforces is the basic attitude of the officer is the same

- they are passionate about their job. They want to get the job done.

Whether it's a simple crime, just helping a member of the public or a

major investigation, the police officers really take ownership of

it. What I've noticed with the detectives we're talking to on

Crimewatch is that they live the crime. They want to make sure that

the man is caught, the criminal is caught, the people are looked after.

But also, there is this incredible team spirit, this bond, that will

never change. Whether it's the police force from 100 years ago or

today. The bond amongst the officers is huge. Does it make it

easier to do the job because you used to be in the force? I think so.

It gives me a certain amount of credibility. I know what they're

trying to do. I can understand what they're trying to do. I have huge

respect for them. It's a difficult job. Have you solved more crimes on

Crimewatch than when you were an officer? We had an embarrassing

situation in 1995, we were in South Africa on the World Cup. My

colleagues at the police station got old of a promotional cardboard

cut out of me and put me behind my desk in the police station and let

me know in the six weeks of the World Cup this cardboard cut out

did more police work than I'd done. I'm presuming it was actual size as

well. How tall are you? 6'10". are an salute unit, aren't you?

Absolutely massive. And standing up? Bless you. ( Sorry, how did

they let you off from the force to play rugby? They were very good,

hugely supportive of me. I was an amateur playing rugby for England.

They pulled my leg a bit. I applied for leave to go on a Lions tour and

they gave me two days. I needed more as it was an eight-week tour.

It's rugby. Relove rugby. We had Matt Dawson on last night talking

about the Six Nations. Did you have to give him a booster seat?

Crimewatch is tomorrow on BBC One. Our penguin friend are nimble under

water but they're no match for these creatures found in British

waters. In British waters and throughout

the world's oceans, cephalapods are the Top Gun pilots of the sea. When

they feel the need for speed, they move using jet propulsion and

whilst jet engines use air to achieve thust, they use water. It's

an efficient system. Some of these creatures can rocket to 25mph

directing themselves with incredible precision, controlling

the thrust and speed of their jet power. And to see the system for

myself I've come to Bristol myself I've come to Bristol

aquarium at feeding time.. Curator Dan has worked here for the past

three years and over this time he's been looking after their giant

That's really strange. Bizarre. It's so powerful. Each one is

completely independent in terms of nerves. That's the jet propulsion,

is it? Getting my free showers is all down to its ability to be able

to suck water in and then push it out. They draw water into their

bodies through the sides of their mantle, this huge flap of skin that

covers their heads. That's full of muscles too. Once they draw in the

water through the sides it goes through their gills. Then it

propels themselves by forcing that water really fast through their

siphon. They can move up to 20mph in a very short period. Obviously a

very powerful body, powerful muscles to propel himself at that

speed. It's amazing. He isn't the only turbo-charged creature of the

sea. Squid are the squadron leaders of this world. They can travel up

to 25mph and some can use their jet propulsion to fly out of the sea,

thought to be a nifty trick to escape predators. But they're not

the only one that's can experience this. We can also get to feel that

power of jet propulsion using water. I'm not quite sure what I'm letting

myself in for. We're at the national dive centre outside

Chepstow to try out a new bit of kid that mimics the jet propulsion

these creatures use to get about. This is the kit. How does it work?

The jet ski sucks up the water, pumps it up this tube and it comes

out these pipes here by your feet. Basically it's like having jet

boots. The water is forced through the Tube in the same way as the

octopus forcing water out through its siphon. Platform shoes - this

is going a bit too far. There will be around 60 litres of water

pumping from the jet every second, creating a huge amount of

propulsion I'm going to have to control. It takes about ten minutes

for me to gain some sort of control. It's like being in a James Bond

movie, rising out of the water. What's amazing is how sensitive the

jets are. You can make tiny movements with your feet to control

collection in much the same way octopus use their siphon. Their

version is more elegant and controlled than mine. But then

they've had years of evolution, and practise.

I would love a go at. That As me. Would you fancy a go? I'd love to.

I hope my sons weren't watching because they'll want them. That

would be an expensive present. Earlier we saw some of the spy

cameras that were used in the brilliant new BBC series Penguins -

Spy In The Huddle. We have put together our own version of the spy

cameras to spy on the penguins of Colchester Zoo. It's perfect

weather there, isn't it? Prepare to be astounded. This is

going to be great. I'm at Colchester Zoo. I'm with the

penguins. The spy cam is astractive some attention or is it the fish

that are being held by head of sea lions and penguins, Kate. You love

the new series, obviously because you love penguins. What's it going

to do for penguin popularity? amazing. The penguins are very

popular any way. Everybody loves them and they come to see them. I

think they'll be even more popular. We took inspiration from Geoff and

John and the cameras they had used and we wanted to infiltrate this

colony. Our One Show boffins set about working on our own One Show

penguin cam. This is it. I'm going to prop it up. It looks like it's

slipping to one side. Let's see if it actually works, if we can get

some pictures of these guys. You might need to use the fish in

fropbtd of the lens there. They're quite interested. Is this

convincing? Well, it's quite a bit bigger than our penguins. It is.

But they're not intimidated. They are being quite curious. Naught lus

is coming over. -- nautilous. We have tested out The One Show

penguin cam here. The One Show boffins tell me it goes at 20mph.

We can't use that because it's on gravel. They should maybe have made

it look a bit more like a penguin instead. John and Geoff, I hope

you're impressed. They are impressed. They have

thumbs up. We were reading through the one liners. They're brilliant.

What's that coming up there. I've just seen a picture of me about to

dance. Sorry. 90% of thieves jokes were horse related. Eric from

Norwich says "I got the sack at a fish processing plant. I was

gutted." This is from Nick, "My ex- girlfriend was called Theresa Crowd,

socialing -- socialising was auk and. Andrew says, I was in the

supermarket and the receipt dropped between my feet. I see I'm footing

the bill. Jim, "Just from the petri dish festival, the food wasn't

great but it was worth it for the culture." I love all these. But if

you've seen my act, you'd understand why. One more that leads

us onto the dancing. I used to be addict totd hoky cokey, but I've

turned myself around. That's from Anni. It's just three days away Tim.

Is it, yes, you're right. How much have you been rehearsing? Every day

this week. What day is it today? Wednesday. Yes every day this week

and then I did four hours last week actually. How's it going? Do you

know, what I think I know the moves. Good. When asked to do it in an

empty room. The idea of doing it in front of an audience live, I'm

worried I'll go blank. To start with you think, yeah this is a

great idea. Then the reality hits and you think, what am I doing?

Yeah, yeah. We've been through it. I get lost quite easily, as you can

tell. The music is actually a bit of a red herring, isn't it? Do you

think you are building it up even more by not revealing it?

because nobody is revealing what they are doing. I cannot make any

more pressure, I already feel huge pressure. You are up against a

whole load of stars, so how do you think you will get on? Seriously,

it is all about just doing it once, I am quite sure I will not get out

of this heat. I would just like to do it and remember... It all comes

in three second chunks, and when I get one of those right, a keeps

stopping, as if to say... It is all for a great cause. Can we interest

you for next year, maybe, Jenni? definitely not. I did stand up for

Comic Relief two years ago, and that was I think the most

frightening thing I have ever done. I hold my hand up to people like

you. You are so courageous. Especially with that many jokes,

that Tim does. At the Comedy Store, you go down a new sea wall of these

pictures of every comedian you have ever loved, and you think, what am

I doing here? It was really frightening. It is nice when they

laugh. That's really nice, when they laugh. He is famous for one-

liners, but you will have to tune in on Saturday evening to see how

he gets on. Last week, on this show, concerns over nursing standards

were raised by Julie Bailey. It followed concerns over the standard

of care at Stafford Hospital, where Julie's mother died. This week, she

went to meet some student nurses, who are about to join the

profession at a very difficult time. Welcome to this afternoon's second

session. It will not be long before these are second year nursing

students leave the comfort of the lecture theatre, and head out on to

the wards. They explained to Julie why a career in nursing was

important to them. I want to have a sense of accomplishment, caring for

someone, giving them that sense of understanding, that compassion,

which is something I feel I can give.. I have seen enough of my

wife's experience in hospitals, and every time she came out and filled,

I liked that place, it was because the nurses were good. This was the

thing that was going to give me a feeling of self-worth. I have got

younger brothers and sisters, and three of them being ill, and seeing

what the medical profession has done, the nurses and doctors, it

showed me that that was what I wanted to do. Here at City

University London, nurses of the future can practise practical

skills in this market ward. Senior lecturer Peter told Julie that

their compassion is also assessed. Lots of the students have life

experience, they may have cared for relative that has needed help in

the health system, or maybe they have done voluntary work. What we

try to do at the University is to enhance those skills, to help

students improve their communication skills, so that they

are more sensitive to the needs of their patients. These postgraduate

students are also looking forward to a career in nursing. But they

told Julie they were worried by the latest scandals to hit the NHS.

When I graduate, I want to work somewhere really good, some were

where everybody is really professional, and has got really

good knowledge to pass on to me. But with these reports coming out,

you think, there are all kinds of places which are not brilliant, not

top-notch. It is probably likely in the real world that a win and that

somewhere in between. And it is how you deal with that which is really

important. Being a good nurse, you can be taught about theory and

policy, but it is about who you are, at the end of the day. You have to

want to care. You either care about people, or you do not. This lady

has just retired from nursing after 56 years of service. She told Julie

that compassion cannot be taught. There was a headline in the paper

not long ago which said - and it upset me dreadfully - that nurses

were being taught to care. You go into nursing because you care, at

least, that's the way it always was. Interpersonal skills are very

important. -- interpersonal skills. Learning to listen to the patient,

to the family, is a huge part of it. And us in the profession, we have

to learn to listen to each other as well. That plays a huge part.

minute, we will be speaking to Christina McAnea, from the Unison

union. But first, some of your views, first of all, in support of

nurses. An anonymous health worker said, in my experience, well over

90% of the health professionals I 90% of the health professionals I

work with a dedicated, caring and compassionate. I feel this group

has been unfairly representative, and the focus has been unfairly put

on the negatives. This has been detrimental to relationships

between patients and staff. Stewart says - two years ago and nearly

died from untreated diabetes. The treatment I received from hospitals

in Stoke-on-Trent and Burton-on- Trent was nothing but exemplary.

Nurses were on hand 24 hours a day and would consider it and helpful,

even with some of the most difficult patients. This one says -

I was treated as a day case in the Royal Marsden Hospital earlier this

week, and I cannot fault the level of care and commitment of all of

those who looked after me. Perhaps those tasked with making

improvements for the NHS should look at what is working well and

reward those who were dedicated truly to the health and welfare of

NHS patients. This one said, following a significant accident

involving myself and a lorry, I spent 14 weeks in hospital, and I

could say that without the care and attention given to me by the

doctors and nurses, I would not be here. I am currently attending as

an out-patient. Can you please not an out-patient. Can you please not

paint all NHS staff with the same brush? Very interesting comments

there, and thanks for joining us, Christina McAnea. We are all aware

of the problems with under stuffing and poor management within the NHS,

but would you agree with what the Prime Minister and the Health

Secretary have said, that there are some problems with some nurses

lacking in compassion? In any profession, some people will not

live up to the highest expectations. But you have to take a look at the

big picture, which is, of all of the nurses registered, just over

half a % are ever referred to the review council. That is a tiny

percentage of people who are ever sent to have to answer questions

around their professional registration. So, there is no point

being defensive about what happened. The Francis report made it

absolutely clear that there had been terrible lapses, terrible

experiences of patients and their families. But by and large, there

is still a lot of trust out there for nurses, and a lot of people I

think appreciate the work they do. What do you think the solution is

to stop these bad apples tarnishing the rest of the NHS? Will,

hopefully, a lot of that will be dealt with when you have student

nurses going through the training programme. 50% of the training is

clinical, in work experience, and 50% is academic. And they have to

do 4,500 hours of training over three years. So, it is probably

more than most other academic training programmes. And you would

hope that in those circumstances, those staff and those students who

are not going to be cut out to be nurses would hopefully be weeded

out, and they themselves will have perhaps want to leave the

profession. As far as the student nurses are concerned, is it really

expressed how tough the job is? Absolutely. People are told right

at the beginning the conditions they can expect. But what we would

say is, one of the difficulties with training at the moment is that

many of the student nurses, their placements can be very short,

sometimes a short as two weeks, and we are trying to argue that they

should have fewer placements, but for a longer period of time, which

would allow them to have much better experience. It will enable

them to be part of a team, to get familiar with the work of the other

people around them. Thank you very much indeed. Earlier, we were

discussing the horse meat scandal. And Jay Rayner went to meet a whole

football club which has decided to do away with meat. The first

reaction from the fans was, we do not want this. But it is a change

from the normal football offerings. This is Forest Green rivers, a

football club which has decided to go vegetarian. -- Forest Green

Rovers. Out go the sausage rolls, in come the vegetarian wraps. It

all started when red meet was taken off the menu in 2011. Now, they

have gone one step further, banning all red meet products. It is part

of a wider, eco-friendly plan by the chairman, Dale Vince, who wants

to make every aspect of the club more sustainable. It includes the

players and what they eat, as well as the grass they play on. I think

it is the first in the world, this grass has no pester lies -- no

fertilisers used on it. What is the sustainability issue with meet

eating? The world is struggling to feed itself. We have got to change

what we eat. Was there not a risk that you might turn off the

supporters? What we were really doing was choosing what was on the

menu. People do not come to football to eat what you eat for

the rest of the week. Come and try something different. In the

kitchens, they are attempting to change decades of football's

carnivorous traditions, with various meat-free offerings. In the

hospitality lounge, what do the players think? You get some

vegetables you have never heard of, and you try it and see that you

actually like it. Do you sometimes say, if only you could have a

stake? No, actually it isn't nice. What about the whole environment of

thing? The same. Most important for the manager is the effect of the

lack of meat, and the effect it has on the pitch. When you go into the

science of what is involved in vegetarian food, and what players

need in terms of proteins, carbohydrates, etc, it is ideal.

They are becoming better, they feel more energised. The meat-free

matchdays do not seem to be doing Forest Green any harm. They are

having a cracking season, within a short distance of promotion to the

Football League for the first time in their history. But at half-time,

as the fans head for the snack bars, the falafel wraps are dividing

opinion. I am a massive fan of the vegetarian food, yes. I think we

should have meet pies, myself. meat place. It is more tasty, more

healthy, it feels like you are not eating rubbish. -- meat pies, So,

time for my own verdict. I have got to say, there has been some really

good stuff here. But the pasty? Not so much, not my cup of tea. But it

seems on the whole, fans are warming to Forest Green's meat-free

policy, with match-day food sales up by as much as 50%. So, are

veggie burgers about to replace meat pies on the terraces? Probably

not, but we will see in seasons to come. And that is full time on this