26/10/2012 The One Show


26/10/2012

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# Left a good job in the City # Working for the man every night

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and day # But I never lost one minute of

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sleep # Wondering about the way things

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might have been # The Big wheel keeps on turning

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# Proud Mary keeps on burning # Rolling, rolling, rolling on the

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Hello and welcome to the One Show with Alex Jones and Chris Evans.

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Let's hear it for the winners of The Choir Singh while you work. --

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Let's introduce our special guest. He has hung out with a rock royalty

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as a Munich -- music journalist and kept us entertained on television

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and radio for decades. Please welcome the lovely Danny Baker.

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Thank you. Tell us about your new book. Joking! You have a new book

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out. I have never written one before. It is full of wisdom and

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drama, but it has been the cause of come -- some kind of drama itself.

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What? Here is the thing. They said be discreet about it. Basically, I

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have never had a book published before and I did not get it until

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Monday night. I thought you got it months in advance and gave one to

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everyone, like confetti. I read it and I thought, that story has been

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in it already. And that should be there. It turns out it was not the

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finished book and they had already printed it up and it was going out.

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They had to bring it back and get other ones out. But it is all right

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now. It is still not out yet. people have told me they can get it,

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like boot leg. It is already the collector's item. More about the

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book throughout the show, but first, one of the best-known tunes in the

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world. One up -- a record number of people are expected to hear it

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Of course, we're talking James Bond. Not many people know the story of

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how it came about. Gyles Brandreth does.

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From the moment that Dr No hit the big screen, it was not just 007 who

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grabbed the world's attention. It was the bold and enigmatic tune

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that accompany the title sequence. I have been expecting you, viewers.

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Bond villains may come and go but the James Bond theme tune has

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endured for 50 years. Everyone knows the tune, but few

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know who composed it. Monty Norman was a big name in the theatre in

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the 1950s and 1960s. His musical was backed by the man who later

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produced the James Bond films. rang me and asked me to come to his

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office to meet his new partner. He said, we have just acquired the

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rights of Ian Fleming's James Bond novels, and we are going to turn

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them into films. The first one is going to be Dr No. Would you like

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to do the score? Did you know the novels? Not really. I had heard of

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James Bond but I had never read them. And then he was made an offer

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he could not refuse. He and his family were invited to Jamaica,

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where the film was being made, hoping to inspire him. That was the

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clincher for me. I did not know whether the James Bond film would

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be a flop or anything, but at least we would have the sun, sea and sand

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holidays. Monty was inspired, and he began to write the score. He

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needed a bold scheme to open the film. So, where did the James Bond

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theme come from? It came from a musical that Julian More and I were

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writing, called A House for Mr Biswas, based on V.S Naipul's novel.

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The musical, based on the story of an Asian community, featured

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traditional Indian Ince -- instruments, but it never made the

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stage. I went to my bottom drawer and found this number that I had

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always liked, and I played it to myself.

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# I was born with this unlucky # I came into the world the wrong

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way round. # It had this very Asian quality.

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get the Indian feel, but whereas James Bond? I thought, what would

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happen if I split the notes. So I went... And immediately, the moment

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I did that, I realised that this was what I was looking for. And the

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producers agreed. They brought in a new young talent called John Barry

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to arrange the peace, and both the film and the theme tune were hit.

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John Barry's name went on to become synonymous with 007 which led many

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to think he had composed the theme tune, but Monty had set the tone

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for James Bond. I would like to send a cable. His sexiness, mystery,

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ruthlessness, it is all there in a few notes. Good night.

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obviously, the world agrees. years on, we want to hear his theme

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on the traditional Indian instruments that inspired it. It is

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performed here in the shadow of MI6. Monty Norman wrote this tune and it

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has conquered the world. How do you feel about that? Very proud. I am

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happy that it is 50 years on, and I am happy that I am still here.

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There you go, for your ears only. The tune from a composer's bottom

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What a story! The unsung hero of the James Bond theme. Time for

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another musical success. If you did not see The Choir last night,

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Gareth Malone was on the hunt for the best work play squire. Here is

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a snippet of what you missed. -- # Birds flying high, you know how I

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feel # Sun in the sky, you know how I

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Oh, yeah, baby! You were singing. How did you feel? Absolutely

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amazing. It was an amazing performance by the whole choir.

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Very magnanimous of you. Some performers like to own the stage,

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but others have to get through what they are doing. How did it feel for

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you? I was only told a week and a half before that I would do the

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solo, so managing to get through it was very hard, but we did it.

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us about the trophy. This had been a secret, the fact that you had one.

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The kids had to keep it secret. Well done. Where did you keep the

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trophy? The Severn Trent Centre, our head office. I have not seen it

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since we won it. Well, it is out now. What is the future for the

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choir? There is a big future. We are rehearsing for a big Christmas

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concert in December and we will be carrying on, with more staff

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planned for the new year. There is no proof that you needed to vote

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people out because the coach was too small. You are not going to

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vote Sam out, are you? We look forward to hearing is singing at

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the end of the show. We have a film about telling tales in pubs. Can

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you ask Danny why he lies all the time? Chris said that all of the

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stories in your book might not be true. What about Elton John?

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greatest tribute anybody could pay me, having read this, is to say

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that they do not believe it. That would validate living it. It is all

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true. It finishes in 1982, the book. People say, that is just when you

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get into television, as if only amazing things can happen in the

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media. We know that it is not like that. Last time I was on a here you

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were good enough to let me expose the eyelid with Elton John for a

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few years. That is explained in this. -- I lived with Elton John. A

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journalist campaigning for the Labour Party before Elton had come

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out was told that they were looking for lovers to spill the beans. I

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think I was the only straight person ever to work there at that

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time, and they found it amusing. They said, you should live -- you

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should speak to Danny Baker because he lived with Elton John for years.

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It took a long time for the journalist to say this. It is a

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story I tell with pride, because I could then ring up Elton John and

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say, I think the papers are after you. I tried to be gay for ages.

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Did you? I worked in the street, straight out of school at 15, and

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the street was as gay as a tangerine. I suddenly found myself

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going, hello, deer! I could do the written, but the practical, it was

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a shame. I tried to be gay for so long. Well done. We have all done

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it, haven't we? We have all told aphid or two. I thought we had all

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tried to be gay! Iwan Thomas certainly tells a few tall stories.

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Here is my exaggerated stories. I once met Kylie Minogue. That is

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true. She also told me I was cute. But the more times my mates are

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here the story, that encounter became a lot more. Never told a

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white lie? No. I have a friend that does it all the time. I definitely

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told someone I was 10 years older. I told people I had climbed

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mountains without any idea. I told someone he had a connection with

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someone famous from the 60s who played guitar with his teeth.

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once told me they had too much to drink at university and basically

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decided to go and borrows some traffic lights and road signs. And

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they put them up in their flat and got go-karts and pretend to have a

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road system. So you have gone from saying that you never lie, to lying

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about your age, about your car... used to know Cilla Black and the

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Beatles. And I do tell the story that I knew Pete Best, but they did

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not really know him well. Those are the stories I used to exaggerate.

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How many times have you heard the Cilla Black story? Not a lot,

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really. I would be bringing it out all the time!

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Danny Baker, you also tell people that you were David Essex's brother.

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Yes. If I lived as his brother... That is me. That is me on the right.

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Behold the ruins of a once great beauty. That is me in the record

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shop at about 16, 17. I was doing OK. With all due disrespect to

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other biographers, those ones that tell you they were lonely as

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children, my book is not like that. I was extremely happy and got on

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great with the girls. But it hit me once people kept saying, you look

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like David Essex. In the days of the internet, the thing that will

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make things spread quicker is to ask someone not to tell anyone. I

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said to one person, I'm David Essex's brother, don't tell anyone.

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After that, this went on for years, people believed it. People would

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come over and say, my mate reckons you're David Essex's brother. I

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would say, I am not. They would say, oh, you are. For 18 months I told a

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good section of women I was his brother. He has just started a UK

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tour and has taken time to send you I hope the book does well, all the

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rest! There are lots of things that people could have said. His real

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name is David Kirk and I thought, they will find that out. Some said,

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how can you name is Danny Baker? I said, the family does not want to

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be pestered. He said, could and Baker? Get it? You book contains

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some stories that are true? There are no stories in their that are

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true. The first thing that got me interested in words is Edward Lear

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and Spike Milligan. In a the Jumblies, I found a good metaphor

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or for setting out on a career that I had no training for. The rest of

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it is like that but it has come back to haunt me because the book

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is called getting back. People say, you are doomed to failure? No, it

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is called Getting Mac. - Mike Going To Sea In A Sieve. I knew this was

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an odd way to live. The jobs I had before her... I was travelling at

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the world. Meeting Michael Jackson in Los Angeles. I am not 20 years

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old and it is a brought -- ought thing that has brought me here.

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told us earlier that some of them were made up! I didn't say that. I

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said one specific story about you killing Bob Marley. That is not my

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:17:05.:17:09.

fault, that is the internet's fault. Did you kill Bob Marley? I did not.

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He wasn't even murdered! His book, is out in the shops soon. Wednesday

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is Hallowe'en and if you are carving out a pumpkin, I have been

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learning a few tricks. A flickering candle lighting up a

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grin, the pumpkin is what Hallowe'en is all about. The

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tradition has its roots in an ancient festival when a turnip

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lantern was lit and left on the doorstep to ward off evil spirits.

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It was the Americans who really took the tradition to their hearts,

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replacing the turn up with their native tongue can. -- pumpkin. This

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is Lincolnshire where farmer David says he grows more pumpkins and

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anywhere else in Europe. How many are either in his warehouse of

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years? I would think the best part of 3 million. Entirely for the

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Hallowe'en market, not much trade for them afterwards. His father

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started producing pumpkins years ago for an nearby airbase and in

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the last few years, demand has rocketed. His pumpkins take just

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four months to grow but this year, the great British weather has made

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it tough. Some are a bit green when I expected them all to the Orange.

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That is because it has been a lousy weather with the cold and rain.

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When my turn orange in the heat? sincerely hope so. Whether the

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harvest is good or bad, this place regards itself as the British home

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of the pumpkin. Every year, they celebrate with a week-long festival

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culminating in a pan can parade. This year I want to see if I can

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persuade the locals that there is more to a pun can manage just

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carving a scary face. The chef promises he can impress me with the

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versatility of the vegetable in a ball that sweet and savoury dishes.

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We carve a scary face for Hallowe'en but for Thanksgiving we

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make pies and risotto and soup and butter. There are hundreds of

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varieties but the one she found in the shops for Carling at Hallowe'en

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are fine for cooking. Is there anything to be scared of?

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Absolutely not. It is like cooking with any other root vegetable.

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First we are making a puree which Alex we used to make a three-course

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feast. Soup, risotto balls and a gorgeous pumpkin pie. Were going to

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mix this with our winter spices, nutmeg, cinnamon and ginger. Some

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eggs, evaporated milk. 40 minutes later, it is done. Next, on with

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the risotto. The good think about these is they now go in the deep

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fat fryer which is the best thing that can happen to any ingredient.

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This is the bit I have been waiting for, a testing time. O! Smooth,

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rich, buttery - this is what made America great! I love these pumpkin

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treats but what about the people here? That's nice and creamy.

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just can't have it and it is a shame because that is lovely.

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tastes like carrots. Do you ever eat it? I have never tasted it. It

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would go nice with chips. Thanks to Alex for lending his culinary magic.

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Mike tray is practically bare and I think it is time that we look at

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their humble pumpkin in a new light. What other unused you bring us?

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Acropolis fine although the farmer was complaining about the weather,

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the prices have not gone up and there are plenty in the shops.

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said that lots of people carve it and throw it away? You can eat the

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seeds, you can make the oil from it. We have made an ice-cream from it.

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It is a very versatile vegetable. In Mexico they deep fry the flowers

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in Portugal they make a cake with Ammons. In Kenya, this team

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believes. It is gorgeous. The size of the biggest pumpkin in the world

:22:31.:22:41.
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is 2009 pounds. Look at that! it is time for a woodpecker with a

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very long time. This week, Mike and Miranda had been on a wildlife

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mission and tonight it is time for the final stick at. We have found

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some amazing sights over the last few days but his next challenge is

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by far the biggest. Hopefully it will happen here. We both like

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watching the birds but I am the most interested in seeing a

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different varieties. What different species have you seen? Great tits,

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blue tits, nut Hatch and the woodpeckers as well. These are the

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most common that woodpeckers to visit our garden feeders but out in

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the wild, they are more likely to eat invertebrates and I want to

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show this couple one of the unique ways they do it, using their

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astonishing tongue. We have no idea if it will work or not. We have an

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old cherry a long and behind that crews, we have fat and those

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wriggly worms. Brilliant food for woodpeckers. We're hoping the

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woodpecker is going to see the worms, come in and insert that huge

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tank which is wrapped around the brain and get the worms. It is a

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desperate hunt, we had no idea it will work. Great if it comes off.

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This is the job for at camera in a hide for a very long time. Trevor

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has a garden mystery he would like us to solve. I was out here on my

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hands and knees weeding and I heard this St scratching noise and it was

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a wasp on the fence panel. I don't know what it was doing. I have been

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digging around and I found something that I need to show you.

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Just on the other side of the offence is a beautiful wasp's nest

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so what those Wasps are doing his grinding a bit of your fence away,

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mixing it with saliva and then making a nest. We're only this

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close because it is late in the season and there are few wasps

:25:09.:25:13.

around. To give you an idea of what it looks like internally, by

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glamorous Assistance's neighbour had this in his house. This is

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obviously a lot bigger but you can get an idea of the structure. The

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thousands of cells in the nest are designed to house the brood of

:25:32.:25:36.

young Wasps. The gaps between the layers let air move about to help

:25:36.:25:42.

regulate nest temperature which Wasps managed very well. They will

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fan their wings to moves the air around the nest and can collect

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water to damp it down if it gets too hot. I gather there is more

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than one variety, do we know what species this one is? We have 250

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species in this country, seven of which are social and build their

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nests like this. We have one of the Wasps here and that is a common

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wasp. Despite a bad reputation, Wasps are great to have in the

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garden as they feed on things that attack last and vegetables like

:26:16.:26:25.

caterpillars and flies. D'you want to let it go? It has taken us three

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days but we have had a phenomenal excess with our feeder. Have a look

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at this. There is the woodpecker. Watch this. First it takes a few

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because it can reach them with his bill quite easily. Then it needs to

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use its tongue. Their guilt. That is incredible, I didn't realise it

:26:54.:27:00.

would work like this but that is spectacular. This is slowed down to

:27:00.:27:10.
:27:10.:27:11.

times so it is lashing that tongue out at an incredibly quick wit. If

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I had a tongue that size, scaled to human size, it would be 50

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centimetres long. Can you imagine that! We're absolutely thrilled we

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have got it. You guys have a unique feeder, no one in Britain has a

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special bespoke woodpecker feeder like this. I will give to you, the

:27:41.:27:51.
:27:51.:27:54.

feeder and a supply of worms. what we have always wanted!

:27:54.:27:58.

Danny's autobiography, Going To Sea In A Sieve, is on from 6th November.

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The biggest star is your dad? book that has endless encounters

:28:04.:28:09.

with Mick Jagger and Elton John and so on, my dad is still the biggest

:28:09.:28:19.
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star and the people who have read it say, oh, your dad is great.

:28:24.:28:30.

shall dedicate the whole show to Henna! Ben Elton is here on Monday,

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have a good weekend and don't forget to put your clocks back on

:28:33.:28:39.

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