26/02/2013 EastEnders

Get up, Phil.

Come on, stop messing about!

Babe, why don't you trust me? It's not something you want to get involved in.

What, cos I'm the other woman?

Come on, Mum, this is our local.

You're not old enough to have a local, are you?

A lot of people weren't that fond of him, that's all.

Me included. But this ain't about Derek.

Just a little toast with the family so Alice knows he's not forgotten.

-She was properly upset?

-She tried buying his favourite food

-with a dodgy note.

-That's appropriate.

Let her just celebrate her dad's birthday, just this once!

PHONE VIBRATES

All right, yeah. Tell you what,

get her here in half an hour, all right?

-I don't want this dragging on all night.

-Good boy.

All right! You'll crease my shirt.

I hope you don't expect the girls to show up.

Don't start. At least she's making an effort.

-It's Lauren that'll be starting, ain't it?

-I thought Lauren liked Alice.

-Don't.

-What?

-We all like Alice.

Then why don't you come?

Don't think I don't know what you're trying to do.

They'll never accept you.

Some people just don't know how to lose, do they?

Let's get out of here.

Max, it's Jack. Can you just call me as soon as you get this message?

Where have you been?

Am I running this place with a child on my own now, am I?

Do you know how much I've got on my plate, Jack? Jack!

So would anything actually change then, or what?

I'll still be your boss. Only thing is, if I want to sack you,

I won't have to ask Phil's permission.

As if you needed his permission for that!

-He's wrapped round your little finger, ain't he?

-Yeah.

Jack?

Come to apologise, have you?

There you are!

Oh, Joey, this concerns you, too,

it being your dad's birthday.

Jack?

Look, I ain't being funny, Kirsty,

but he ain't going to turn up, is he?

Max said yes, so you have to go along with it. Right, Jack?

-Why bother, eh?

-Alice thinks everyone's forgotten her old man.

Yeah, we have, and that's with good reason. I'm sorry, I am,

but I'm not interested.

Phil?

Is everything all right?

What have you done to yourself?

I love you.

-Dex?

-Mum.

Dexter. Clocked off yet?

Got to finish this gearbox by tomorrow, Phil said.

You said you were going to treat me to dinner!

If I ain't got this done by morning, he'll string me up.

Mum, what are you doing?!

-I'm far too old for that, man.

-I'll buy my own sticky ribs, then.

You're getting sticky ribs?

All right, I'll finish it tomorrow, then.

So what was so important?

Right...

I have an admission to make.

I've been living beyond my means.

-Sorry?

-I'm broke. I don't have any money.

When I gave you that note, I knew it was dodgy.

I know, I know. I'm sorry. I feel terrible about it.

Before you say anything,

I want you to have that.

Come on. It's a good one. You can take it to a pawn shop.

Do what you like with it. It'll more than cover your costs.

-It looks expensive.

-It is.

Janine gave it to me, so I don't have any qualms

about giving it to you.

Nearly done?

Yeah.

Joey, did Jack seem odd to you?

Didn't notice. Why?

Couldn't shut him up earlier, and just now, he barely said a word.

-Just, "I love you."

-Yeah? Maybe he's got a guilty conscience.

Hey, I'm not going to cover the cost of you breaking that delivery van.

-What I don't understand is, how come I don't get a say?

-A say in what?

Who cares if Alice wants him remembered? I want him forgotten.

-She's upset.

-I understand that. Of course she's upset.

But at the end of the day, she's the one who went chasing after him.

-If she hadn't done that, she'd be fine.

-Don't work like that, does it?

She makes the mess and I have to clear it up. That's how it works.

Believe me, this is more about Kirsty

trying to make a name for herself than Alice.

Yeah, well, if they think I'm raising a glass to him,

they've got another think coming.

Joey...

Why did you say that about Jack?

Why would he have a guilty conscience?

I don't know. He's your fiance, not mine.

DOOR OPENS

-I saw the light on.

-Yeah, well, when the alternative's

a B&B with a shared living room, this place gets pretty inviting.

I got your message. I take it you heard about Derek's thing?

I've said to Kirsty, just keep it low key.

Just a toast or something...

-Just shut up, will you?!

-What's the matter with you?

What's all that on your hand?

It's evidence, ain't it?

I snapped. I just punched him.

Punched who?

There is no way I am sitting round a table,

-singing Happy Birthday for Uncle Derek!

-Why?

Who've you been talking to?

Surely one of the perks of him snuffing it

-is that...

-Lauren!

-..we get to forget about him

and move on with our lives.

Are you going, Uncle Jack?

-You all right, Jack?

-Yeah, of course he's going.

Where's the family solidarity with you lot?

So Kirsty's family now, is she?

-Sorry, babe, this is nothing to do with you, is it?

-So I'm not family!

Did I even mean that?

Great, Dad(!)

Yeah, really well handled(!)

Yeah, well, you two ain't making it any easier, are you?

-I've got to go.

-Jack! Jack!

Sorry, girls, I can't deal with this now.

Does that mean we don't have to go, then?

-So she turns up to work on time?

-Yes!

-Pulls her weight?

-Yes!

All right. I'll keep my nose out of it.

-Where is she now, then?

-Oh, Mum!

-I hope you're OK today.

-Me?

Well, it being Derek's birthday.

I completely forgot.

-I found Alice all upset today.

-You'd better go and see her.

-Yeah.

Well, we're having a little drink for him in the Vic in 15.

-She'll be so happy if you can make it.

-Yeah, yeah, of course.

Yes! So far, that's Max, you, me, and Dot.

What about Jack?

Maybe you could have a word?

Yeah, yeah. OK. Leave it to me, yeah.

Thank you. See you soon.

See you.

Maybe she's not that bad.

-I can't take this.

-You must. I want you to,

because the best I can offer you apart from that would be an IOU,

and that's not going to pay the bills.

No, but it'll have to do for now.

Seriously, please, I'm just glad you were honest with me.

PHONE BEEPS

Thanks.

I always knew you were a good soul.

But really, thanks. From me and Scarlett.

Come on, think!

Passport.

-So what are you going to do?

-Sign it.

He's offering me a stake in the club for free, Tanya.

-It's worth thousands.

-Is it for free, though?

You sound like Jack.

I'm getting the good cop, bad cop routine at the minute.

He's shouted at me, told me he loves me.

Is it working?

The more he tries, the more I dig in.

He just needs to accept me and Phil are friends, you know?

Like I need to accept Kirsty?

-Have you heard about her little gathering for Derek?

-Yeah!

"I just want to do it for Alice. I just want to make her smile."

-Are the girls going to go?

-Over my dead body. Seriously.

DOOR OPENS

-Right, then, I'll leave you to it, babe. See you later.

-Yeah.

All right? You ain't seen Jack, have you?

Not for ten stress-free minutes, no.

-Dad says that we should go.

-Yeah, but only with your blessing.

KNOCK AT DOOR

Oh... Jack?

Your door was a-swinging on its hinges, so I just walked in.

You want to be more careful.

Dot, now's not a good time.

Is there ever a good time for remembering the dead?

Apparently, you're pre-disposed not to toast the memory of your brother

on his birthday, so I just popped over to find out why not.

A cup of tea would be very welcome.

Mum, just please say that we can't go.

Look, I don't think it matters what anyone thought of Derek.

It's for Alice, isn't it? She's upset.

That's not my decision to make, is it?

You're old enough to decide for yourselves.

Well, would you be upset if we go?

Of course not, no.

I'm made of stronger stuff than that, aren't I?

Right. That's settled, then, innit?

I'm going to go and find Jack. See you in ten minutes.

Phil?

PHONE RINGS

"Our dead are never dead to us until we have forgotten them."

That is a quotation from a bit of poetry.

Listen, Dot, I can't do this right now.

I've got problems with Sharon I need to sort out.

Problems are what relationships are all about.

It's when you stop trying to solve them

and run away that the trouble begins.

Sorry about that. I had to deal with the girls.

-I've got Dot here giving me relationship advice!

-All right, Dot?

All I was saying was that running away causes more problems

-than standing still, half the time.

-I just need a private word

-with my brother, all right? Won't be a sec.

-Charming(!)

Well? Who'd you hit?

Phil.

Phil? What, and he didn't hit back?

-He couldn't, could he?

-What do you mean, he couldn't? Why not?

Max, I hit him. He fell in the pit, he banged his head.

There was blood coming out of his ears.

-Is he all right?

-No, he's not all right.

You're going to be in ever so much trouble

if you don't stop ignoring me.

I mean, this is supposed to be a family,

not a bus what you can jump on and off as soon as it pleases you.

I mean, at least to Derek, family meant something,

and I intend to honour for it, and you two are going to come with me.

Come on, get your coat.

Well, I wouldn't be getting IOUs if you were still here, would I?

There you are! Can't keep you away from this place, can I?

-Coming for a drink?

-I'm really not in the mood.

I thought you wanted to celebrate your dad's birthday, so here I am.

Or don't I count to you, as well?

Oh, Mum, do me a favour and look after Morgan for me.

-I'm going to the pub!

-No, listen, Tiff's round her mates,

-she's been being sick, I've got to go.

-But Kirsty's expecting us.

Please, Mum! Liam's out and I have to make sure she's OK.

-I won't be long.

-Joey's not going to be going either!

There'll be nobody there!

We should go round there, see if he's all right.

-No, there's no point.

-Why not?

-Cos he's dead, Max!

-I was looking for you.

Did he tell you...

about Phil's offer?

No, I didn't think so. He knows you'd tell me to go for it.

What offer's this?

He's giving me a share in the club. I went down the Arches

to see him just now, as a matter of fact.

What did he say, Phil?

I didn't see him.

But when I do, Jack, I'm going to sign. Just thought you should know.

See, he can't be dead, can he? If she never saw him.

He fell in the pit, Max, I told you.

You all right? Listen, Tiff's ill.

Liam'll be back in a minute

-and my mum'll be straight over. All right?

-Yeah.

Sharon thinks she can just play us off each other forever.

Let's go over there, see if he's all right.

Jack, you can't go in there, can you? Not with your hand like that!

What am I going to do, eh? Run? Front it out?

You're going to be my alibi, are you, Max?

Cos Phil is dead. I'm done for.

All she can do is think about signing contracts.

-Jack, please don't go in there.

-Listen, I need a drink.

Right, the guilt trip worked. Here we are.

All right?

Didn't expect to see you in here.

Yeah, well, I want to show her I'm not bothered, don't I?

Plus, if it all goes wrong, I want to watch.

You told him you're signing yet?

What do you think?

Honestly, it's all right round here, Mum.

I mean, I've got friends. I've got a job. Everything I need.

-Yeah, I'm happy for you.

-Mum, you have as well, you know.

Yeah, but it's just... The place is crawling with your family!

My family?

There's one.

Mum, they're not rats.

Hiya, all right?

I hope she's not here for Kirsty.

Dot's here.

Hiya!

Well, she always thought Derek was a saint, didn't she?

He's one, and all. That's two.

-IN AUSTRALIAN ACCENT:

-"We have a rare sighting of

"two specimens of the Branning clan. Wait, it might get interesting."

Stop it!

Dad, don't make me drag you in here. This was your idea.

Three...

Four...

-Five.

-Ssh!

Is this all we could manage, you know, to scrape together?

She's one, as well! That's six!

Mum, I think you're right. Maybe they are rats.

-You all right, Mum?

-Yeah.

Max looks as white as a sheet, though, don't he?

Can I get a drink in here, or what?

I hope Phil don't turn up. He looks like he might kick off.

Shouldn't you be at work?

I'm on a break.

-What you got there?

-It's nothing.

Looks expensive.

Yeah, well...

It probably is. It was my dad's. It's..

It's his birthday.

It's good you've got something to remember him by.

Is that right?

Yeah.

I had my mum's wedding ring for years.

I ended up selling it, and...

..I wish I hadn't. Those things are important, the keepsakes.

Yeah.

Keepsakes, yeah.

Happy birthday, Dad.

What did you do that for?

You know, this is actually the most

I've ever seen of them in one place, ever.

-Your family.

-Our family!

I don't see the resemblance.

Mind you, you've got the family chin.

-What? What are you talking about, family chin?

-You and that Max bloke.

Two peas in a pod!

-Mum, you know you're not funny, innit?

-Come on.

Sticky ribs wait for no man.

PHONE BEEPS

Right, that's it. Girls, they're coming in.

Dot? Dot, they're coming in.

Just when I was going outside for a fag!

Well, I suppose I'll have to wait, won't I?

Which way's she coming?

-Here you go.

-What's this?

To Derek.

Happy birthday.

ALL: Happy birthday.

Don't get upset. It's all right.

-You came for my dad?

-Under duress.

Yes, of course we did, Alice. I mean, he was a lovely man.

He was a true gentleman.

Thank you.

-Thank you.

-Thank Kirsty. It was all her own work.

-Are you going to follow me back to the Arches after, yeah?

-Why?

You want me to pay for dinner, you can help me fit the radiator.

No way!

Mum, come on, man...

DOOR OPENS

HE COUGHS

I thought Carol was meant to be here.

That was a very good turnout for the Brannings.

You've done very well.

Thanks so much for coming, Uncle Jack.

Do you want another drink?

Yeah. Vodka and orange would be good.

Another year quicker, another year smarter,

another year better looking.

And that's just for starter! You remember!

What's the second verse?

Inside or out, there'll be plenty more.

I'll be singing this song till I'm 204!

It's amazing, ain't it?

You can have the house and the kids...

and still feel like your family's slipping away from you.

That's not happening, Tan.

I know I should just be able to get over it, shouldn't I?

I should be able to rise above it.

-She gets under my skin.

-Don't go.

Do you think Mum's OK?

I never got that last line, "inside or out."

He was talking about prison.

Which is where, Sharon, I'll be going!

You happy now, are you? Did you get what you wanted?!

Tan...

Look, I don't know what's wrong, but this ain't the place.

You wouldn't let it lie, would you?

You had to keep pushing till I snapped.

Well, congratulations, cos I snapped!

I don't know what you're talking about, Jack!

-Come on, it's Derek's birthday.

-Oh, yeah. Derek.

I never thought I had anything in common with him.

But he threw his life away, didn't he, eh? Just like I did.

Cos next time you see me, I'll be old and twisted, just like him.

Yeah? My daughter, Amy, is going to hate me. Just like Joey hated him.

And when I die, this is all I've got to show for it!

Two nieces that were dragged against their will to toast my memory.

Oh, yeah, and Dot! Dot, along for the sherry!

Sorry, Jack, I shall be long gone.

-Stop it.

-No, no, don't blame me, all right?

If you want to blame someone, you blame her.

Cos this is what you wanted, ain't it?!

If you want to talk, let's go to the flat.

No, there's no time to talk!

Cos my life is done, all right? And so is his!

You're going to blame me for this, ain't you?

But you know what? It was you, all right? It was your games!

It's your fault. So go and sign your contract! Go on!

-Cos me and you, we're finished!

-Finished?

-Sharon, I loved you! I loved you! And you broke it!

-Enough!

So go on, walk. Go on!

Walk!

Phil! Are you OK? Has there been an accident?

Someone call an ambulance.

Sit down. Come on, over here.

Do you think he's OK?

I don't know. Have you been in a fight?

All right, Phil?

Phil, can you remember what happened to you?

It's all right.

It's all right, Jack. He don't remember.

He don't remember.

Phil, don't try and move, OK?

I don't think you should move yet...

You!

You did this!

Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd