Episode 28 Beat the Brain

Hello, it's me, The Brain.

These are the kind of challenges our team will face today.

Have a go at home.

What's the word in the middle?

Try one more.

Count the ice creams.

I'll relieve your anxiety by giving you the answers at the end of the show.

Now let's see if four brains are better than one -

it's Beat The Brain.

APPLAUSE

Please welcome a man who can put his feet under my table any time.

-It's John Craven.

-Well, thank you very much.

Welcome once again to Beat The Brain.

On this show, you don't need general knowledge to play,

just a sharp, perceptive mind.

Over the next half hour, our four contestants will face

arduous puzzles and demanding challenges

all designed so that you can join in at home, as well.

Let's say hello to the brain that masterminds this mental marathon.

-How are you today, Brain?

-I'm well, I suppose, John.

But wish I was your tie so I could hang around your neck all day.

HE LAUGHS

-I'm ready to play the game.

-Well, so are our team. Let's meet them now.

Please introduce yourselves.

I'm Ian and I'm a charity fundraiser.

I'm Monica and I'm a learning-support assistant.

I'm John and I'm retired.

I'm Janet, I'm the team captain and I'm a tax accountant.

-APPLAUSE

-Well, welcome, everybody.

And Janet is the team captain.

What name have you chosen for your team?

We're called the Freezywater Wets.

The Freezywater Wets, why on Earth?

We actually met when Ian came to be the pastor

of the Baptist Church that John and I attended at the time.

And baptism, in the Baptist Church, is full immersion in water

so we were wet.

-Was the church in a place called Freezywater?

-Indeed, yes.

-Right.

-And are you all related?

-John and I are married.

-Yep.

Ian and Monica are married.

And we have, between us, known each other for 30 odd years.

All the very best today. Let's hope you enjoy trying to beat The Brain.

Here's how it works. The show's brain is divided into six Zones.

Now, The Brain will select four out of those six Zones

for you to play today.

And Janet it's up to you, really, as the team captain, to decide

-which of your players will do best in each of the Zones. OK?

-OK.

You will face a series of questions in each Zone with each correct

answer adding three seconds to what we call your Brain Bank.

And the more you build up,

the better chance you have of beating The Brain in today's Final

and walking away with our jackpot of £3,000.

So, Freezywater Wets, are you ready to play?

-ALL:

-Yes.

Right, time to find out which Zone you'll be facing first.

So, Brain, the Zone, please.

Language it is. So, Janet, who are you nominating?

Would you like that one, Monica?

-MONICA:

-Me or Ian was going to do Language.

-I don't mind which way. Do you want to do it?

-OK, I'll do Language.

-JANET:

-It will be Monica, then.

-OK, Monica. Well, please, join me.

APPLAUSE

-Are you looking forward to this or not?

-Very much.

-Good.

-I like using language.

-Do you speak various languages?

Yes. As well as English, French and Russian fluently

and I speak bits of other languages. I speak bits of Polish and Italian.

Bit of modern Hebrew.

-So, you obviously enjoy playing around with words.

-I love it.

-Yes, and I love languages generally.

-Right, are you ready?

-No, but I'll give it a go.

-Let's play the Language Zone now.

You'll play two games in this Zone.

Both games have three questions worth three seconds each.

So, Brain, what's the first game?

-Hello, Monica.

-Hello, Brain.

-You were Brain of Enfield once, weren't you?

-Yes, that's true.

-You got a question wrong, what was it?

Oh, they asked what a shih tzu was

and I thought it was something to eat rather than a dog.

-Monica, I'm never letting you order a takeaway for me.

-Very wise.

Here's your first game.

Find the word that fits between the other two.

Each dash represents a letter.

To help you out, have a trial run.

-Split.

-Split, you think. Banana split, split second.

Yep, I think so.

That was answered in a split second, wasn't it? So, well done.

-Are you ready to play for real?

-Yes. Let's try.

-Off we go.

You have only 45 seconds to answer three questions.

Monica, your game starts now.

-Net.

-Net, you think.

-Mosquito net, net curtain.

-Yes, well done.

Next one.

-Oil, don't think it's oil.

-Oil, you're saying.

Oh, greenhouse gas, gas leak.

Gas, yes, that's correct.

One more to go and 25 seconds left.

Oh, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine...

Oh, heavens. Split...

SHE SIGHS

Keep thinking split second, that's not right.

-Split time, trait?

-Ten seconds to go.

Oh.

-It is a long word.

-I'm just trying to think, genetic trait...

-Guess quickly.

-Can't think of anything, genetic?

-No.

Let's find out what it was.

Split personality, personality trait.

-Oh, I'm so sorry.

-So, you did very well on the first two.

-So, ready for the second game?

-Yes, indeed.

-Could we have it, please, Brain?

-Of course. Here's the second game.

Rearrange the newspaper cuttings to form a word.

To get your eye in, Monica, have a trial run.

-What word...

-Jasmine.

-Jasmine.

-J-A-S-M-I-N-E.

Yeah, I think you could well be right. You are indeed.

-OK, so that was just the test.

-Yeah.

-Let's put you to the real test now.

-Thank you.

-Off we go.

-You have 45 seconds to answer three questions.

Your game starts now.

-Version.

-Version.

Yes, well done. Next one.

Splits.

Splits, yes.

30 seconds left.

Oh, heavens.

15 seconds left.

-Hetaeicst.

-Hm?

Hetaeicst. H-E-T-A-E-I-C-S-T... No.

No, it's not that, I don't think. A guess?

Out of time, I'm afraid. Did anybody else in the team get that?

-I think it's aesthetic.

-Aesthetic. Let's have a look and see.

You're right.

Well done, there, Ian. Your husband beat you on that last one.

-Absolutely.

-But, unfortunately, he can't get any seconds.

-Oh!

HE LAUGHS

So, Brain, what's your verdict on Monica's performance?

Monica did very well which, of course,

is very disappointing news for me.

Every second counts in the Final, Monica

and you've just upped the chances by getting 12 seconds in that Zone.

This means Freezywater Wets have 12 seconds in their Brain Bank.

-So far, so good, then.

-APPLAUSE

-Thank you.

-Thank you for playing, Monica.

-Thank you so much.

-If you'd rejoin the team.

So, time to find out what our next Zone is going to be

and who will be taking it on. So, Brain, the Zone, please.

-Multi-tasking it is. So, Janet?

-That one's mine.

Nobody else wants it so it's mine.

LAUGHTER

Well, that's very brave of you as captain.

When nobody else wants it you're going to take it on.

So, come and join me.

APPLAUSE

-So, Janet, you've been a Mensa member.

-I have.

-So, you enjoy testing your brain in all kinds of strange ways?

-I do.

What are you looking forward to in Multi-tasking? I mean, do you...

-Hopefully...

-Do you think you're a good multitasker?

I'm a woman so that makes me a multitasker, I feel.

-That's what women say.

-That's right.

-I'm out to prove it.

-Yeah.

-I think it's having children.

And having to keep an eye on what they're doing as well as doing

whatever needs to be done around the house.

That makes a big difference.

Well, let's see what The Brain has in store for you.

Brain, please reveal the first game that Janet will be playing.

-Hello, Janet.

-Hello, Brain.

-Here is your first game.

Count the named object on the left. Add the numbers on the right.

To give you some practice, have a trial run.

Count the ice creams and add the numbers.

So, how many ice creams and what was the total on the right?

-12 on the right, three ice creams, I think.

-Let's see if that's correct.

It was indeed.

-Right. Ready to play?

-Ready.

-Off we go, then.

-Please remember I can only accept your first answer.

-OK.

Your game starts now.

Count the carrots and add the numbers.

-How many carrots?

-Two carrots.

-Two carrots and what was the total?

-11.

2 and 11, you're saying. Is that correct?

It is indeed, well done. Very good start. Onto the next one.

Count the dogs and add the numbers.

-So, how many dogs?

-Five dogs.

-Five dogs. And the total?

-19.

5 and 19. Is that correct?

It is, indeed. This really is multi-tasking, isn't it?

So, one more for you, Janet.

Count the rubber ducks and add the numbers.

-How many rubber ducks?

-Five.

-Five.

-And the total?

-22.

-5 and 22.

Is that right?

-Ah!

-Oh, 4 and 22. Just missed on that one.

Where did I see the other duck?

-The rubber ducks fooled you.

-Indeed, yes.

-So, ready for game two?

-OK.

-Off we go.

-Here's your second game.

Count the number of times the named object appears in the spinning wheels.

Have a trial run.

Count the corns on the cob.

-How many corns on the cob?

-I saw seven.

-You saw seven.

What did the answer see?

It saw seven as well, well done.

-Ready for the game?

-OK, ready.

-Let's play for real.

Remember, I can only accept your first answer.

Your game starts now.

Count the snowflakes.

-How many snowflakes?

-Nine.

-Nine, you think. Is that right?

It is, indeed. Next one, please. They get faster now.

Count the pears.

How many pears did you spot?

-I made it 17.

-17, you think.

Is that correct?

-Oh!

-One out. One out.

-Ready for the last one?

-Yep.

Count the horses.

-How many horses?

-I made that 17.

-17.

See if that's correct.

It is! That time it was right.

-That was a worry.

-Yes. So, well done. Well done, Janet.

-Thank you.

-And she did all right, didn't she, Brain?

-Absolutely.

You and Monica are neck and neck.

Because, Janet, you added 12 seconds in that Zone.

Which means, Freezywater Wets, you have 24 seconds in your Brain Bank.

APPLAUSE

-Well done, Captain Janet.

-Thank you very much.

-Please rejoin your team.

So, let's find out which Zone is next and who is going to take it on.

Brain, the Zone, please.

Observation it is. So, Janet, is it John or Ian to do the observing?

-I think...

-Why is everybody looking at me?!

LAUGHTER

-We're hoping you're going to be observant.

-OK.

What do you think, John? Are you happy to take it on?

-It'd appear to be me, yes.

-Yes?

Well, come and join me, then, in the Observation Zone.

APPLAUSE

Nice to see you, John.

Now, I heard a whisper that you would prefer Orientation.

Whenever we go out anywhere I always seem to have this uncanny

ability of knowing where I'm going.

And I can usually find north.

I think it's the same principle as pigeons

who have magnets in their head.

Have you got a magnet in your head?

I've got a steel plate, not a magnet, so it must be that.

-So, that seems to work, it points you to the north?

-Yes.

-Once you know where north is then it's fairly easy to...

-Good.

Well, let's see how you do.

So, Brain, please reveal the first game John will be playing.

-Hello, John.

-Hello, Brain.

-I've never met a human compass before.

-Well, there's always a first time.

-Here is your first game.

Count the number of times the lights come on. Have yourself a trial run.

-How many times did the lights flash?

-19.

-19, you reckon. Is that right?

15.

-So are you ready to play?

-I am ready, yes.

-OK.

Brain, bring on the game.

Please remember, I can only accept your first answer.

Every correct answer will add three seconds to your Brain Bank.

The game starts now.

How many times did the lights come on?

-18.

-18, you say? Is that right?

It is, because they come up very quickly.

Let's move on to the next one.

How many times?

-19.

-19 you're saying, John. Is that right?

-18. One out.

-Oh, dear.

-Get ready for the third one.

-Ready.

Can we have it, please?

How many are you saying?

-22.

-22. Is that right?

17. Ah. Oh, dear.

They're very, very hard. I find incredibly hard, actually.

Ready for the next game?

-Yes.

-Right. Bring it on, please.

Here's your second game.

Short-changed. What's the difference in value between the two totals?

Have a trial run.

What do you think the difference is there, John?

-Er, seven. 7p.

-7p, you think? Is that right?

-3p it was. OK. Ready for it?

-I am.

-Off we go.

You have 45 seconds to answer three questions correctly.

Your game starts now.

What's the difference, do you reckon?

-Er... Pass.

-Pass that one. Next one?

50p it was.

-Er, £1.12.

-£1.12.

-£1.12.

£1.50.

You've got 12 seconds left for the last one.

Five seconds. Have a guess.

-73p.

-73p. 9p.

-Oh, you obviously don't count your change!

-I obviously don't, no.

-Pay by card, you see, that's the thing.

-Yeah.

-I hope you enjoyed playing the game.

-I did, yes.

-Brain!

John, you added three seconds in that Zone, which means in total,

Freezywater Wets have 27 seconds in their Brain Bank.

Right. Well, John. Very nice to meet you.

Thank you very much.

Hope you enjoyed coming up, even if you didn't score that many.

-Ian.

-Yes?

-You're our last player left.

-Yes.

So why don't you come and join me and we'll find out

which of the three remaining Zones you'll be playing.

Good to see you again and a lot depends on your broad shoulders now.

So I make it we've got three Zones left.

We've got Logic, Orientation and Memory.

Which one don't you want of those three?

I think Orientation is the one I don't particularly want,

because I'm not always sure which is my left hand and which is my right.

-Right.

-I think of the three, Logic would be the one I would most like.

Well, let's see what's going to happen.

Brain, please, which Zone is Ian going to play?

-Memory.

-It's Memory.

-We'll see what we can do.

-You don't find that too much?

-No, I don't mind that too much at all.

OK, it's fine. Well, let's play. The Memory Zone.

Brain, please reveal the first game that Ian will be playing.

-Hello, Ian.

-Hello, Brain.

-Here's your first game.

-Thank you.

-Forget me not.

Remember where the pictures were once they've disappeared.

-Have yourself a trial run.

-Thank you.

Where are the pound coins?

Three and five.

Three and five, you're saying, Ian? Are you right? Yes, you're right.

Well done. Yeah.

I think it's a good idea to keep your eyes fixed on that

-grid all the time.

-Yes, yes.

-Right. Ready to play?

-I'm ready to play.

-Can we have the game, please?

-Your game starts now.

-Where are the martinis?

-One and five.

-One and five, you're saying.

-Is that correct?

-It is.

-You've got a good eye for martinis.

-Oh, absolutely, yes.

-Let's move on to the next one.

Where are the cars?

-One, five and nine.

-One, five and nine.

-Is that correct? It is.

-I like cars as well.

-You like cars.

OK, so here comes the third one.

-Where are the balloons?

-One, two, 11 and eight.

-That was quick.

One, two, 11 and eight. Is that right? One, two...

Well done, you. Three out of three. Maximum number of seconds.

-So could we have the second game, please?

-Very speedy, Ian.

-Thank you.

Here's your second game. Follow the leader.

Repeat the order in which the colours flash.

Here's a trial run to help you get the feel of the game.

-Out of those eight colours, which four flashed up?

-OK.

That's pink, white, blue, and black.

Pink, white, blue, and black, you're saying. Is that correct?

-It is indeed.

-Thank you very much.

OK. So you've got the hang of this one.

-I think I've got the hang of this.

-Yeah? Ready to play the game?

-Yes.

-Off we go.

-Please remember, I can only accept your first answer.

-OK.

-Your game starts now.

White, pink, purple, green, black.

-Ah!

-Oh, no, no.

-Nearly.

-Nearly. Nearly right.

-Purple was in the wrong place, wasn't it?

-Yes.

Right, next one.

Ooh! Er, yellow, purple..

..er, yellow, white, green, pink.

Let's have a look.

-No.

-Ah! Close again.

-Yeah. Green, yellow, white.

Yes.

Off we go with the third one.

That's purple, blue,

yellow...

..er...ah, eee, dah-dah-dah -

white, green, black.

And there's another one, probably. Yes. There is.

-And the red at the end.

-And there's red at the end. Yeah.

You'd remembered the first few and then...

-I remembered the first few and then it's the other ones towards the end that get tricky.

-So, Brain?

You did well though, Ian, because you added nine seconds in that Zone,

which means Freezywater Wets -

you have finished with a grand total of 36 seconds in your Brain Bank.

-36 seconds.

-We can do a lot with that.

You can indeed, so please rejoin the team.

Well, we've finished the individual Zones.

It's now time for our team to try to Beat The Brain one last time

and take on some serious cash in today's final.

So, Freezywater Wets,

you have built up 36 seconds in your Brain Bank and your challenge

now is for each of you in turn to answer two questions correctly.

That's eight in total and if you can do that within your 36 seconds,

you'll take home our top prize of £3,000.

If you can't, there's still a chance to win some decent money.

The Brain has given you two further minutes to get those answers in

but as the time ticks down, so does the money -

at the rate of £25 a second and the longer you take, the less

there is to win and if you take too long, you win nothing at all.

OK?

Janet, as the team captain, you've chosen the order in which

your team are going to play so what's your logic behind that?

Well, we thought we would go in the order of the questions

that came up first time round,

so we're in the same order as we played the first round.

So are you happy, Monica, to be going first?

At least I get it over and done with!

-That's the logic behind it, as long as I don't hold the team up for too long.

-OK.

Are we ready? It's time to get serious. Let's start today's final.

Over to you, Brain.

You will only face questions from the games you've already seen today.

But for every game in the final, I will only accept your first answer.

-Freezywater Wets, beat me if you can.

-So that's the challenge.

-Can you beat the Brain?

-ALL: Yes.

Well, we'll see if that confidence plays out.

As usual, we start with the player on the left. That's you, Monica.

I need two correct answers from you before I can

pass on to the next player, and so on down the line. OK?

The best of luck. Let's start the final.

Count the suns.

Six.

Correct. What is the word?

Survivor.

Yes. Janet.

-Ten.

-No.

What's the missing word?

Ivy.

Correct.

Which colours match the sounds?

Green, white, blue, purple, pink.

Incorrect.

What is the word?

-Rainbow.

-Yes. John?

Eight.

No. What word in the middle?

Flare.

Where are the blackbirds?

Three, five, and seven.

-No.

-Count the bananas and add the numbers.

Two and nine.

Yes. Ian.

What's the difference?

-4p.

-Correct.

Count the yellow cups.

-Six.

-No.

What is the word?

-Genius.

-Stop the clock.

Well done.

Well, Wets, you've got eight correct answers. Congratulations on that.

You've won £1,275.

ALL: Wow! Fantastic. Wow, yes! Well done!

Oh, that's gorgeous.

That can't be bad, can it?

-So Captain Janet, you must be proud of your team?

-Very much so, yes.

I was starting to get a bit worried.

-You were really counting down then. 51 seconds left.

-We were.

But you did it. They did well, didn't they, Brain?

Well, that was a very close shave and you beat me, Freezywater Wets,

But I've still got my sweet Johnny Craven, so I have no regrets!

THEY LAUGH

Well, and thank you all for watching at home today.

I hope you enjoyed playing along, got the games right.

-For now, though, it's goodbye from Freezywater Wets.

-ALL: Bye.

-It's goodbye from the Brain.

-Goodbye.

And from me. See you next time we play Beat The Brain.

Before you go, let's see the answers to the questions

I set you at home at the start of the show.

What's the word in the middle?

The answer is night. And what about the second game?

Count the ice creams.

The answer is eight.

Whether you got these right or wrong, you can always

improve your intellect by watching us next time on Beat The Brain.