Whitney and Jake Snog Marry Avoid?


Whitney and Jake

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Transcript


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I'm Ellie Taylor. Snog Marry Avoid is back on the road,

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fighting the fakery of Britain.

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Have you fallen into a muddy puddle?

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That is just so rude!

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If you're brassy and your look is trashy, hold on to your lashes,

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because there's nowhere to hide.

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The world's only make-under computer, POD, is checking that

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Britain's fakers aren't flashing their joysticks or motherboards.

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You look like a pantomime dame.

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No, I don't. I look amazing and colourful.

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From Birmingham to Bromley, Cardiff to Liverpool, POD's sensors

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can seek out the fiercest fans of fakery.

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Families across Britain have had enough of the fakery that's stolen

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their sons and daughters, their brothers and sisters.

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ALL: Down with fakery!

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And I've accepted POD's mission to uncover the latest phony fads

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and expose their ridiculousness.

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Work the bum. Go!

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If you saw me walking down the street...

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I thought it was ridiculous.

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Let the battle against fakery commence. This is Snog Marry Avoid.

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This week, POD's landed back in the home of the dragon,

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daffodils and buff rugby boys.

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THEY ROAR

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Her sensors have detected Welsh fakery that's dipped lower

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than the valleys, and her hard drive needs to tackle it head on.

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We're back in Cardiff.

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Hello, POD.

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Are you all right, Ellie?

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A little bit overexcited. I just got picked up by a load of rugby men.

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Yes, that's because we're in Wales.

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And there's a big problem with fakery.

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Not on those blokes. They were lovely.

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Not on the men, Ellie.

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Sorry. On the ladies. Really? Fake tan, big hair, the usual?

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All the usual suspects. I want you to go and investigate them, please.

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I'm on it like a car bonnet.

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Coming up on tonight's show, we meet someone who's created

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a whole new word for his fakery.

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I don't think I'm quite orange. I would class myself as borange.

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I find why diamonds might be every girl's best friend.

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Would you want to smooch me with this?

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I would!

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And we meet an extension addict whose mum is tearing her hair out.

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I'm just losing the will to live with her now.

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If you want to get spotted in Cardiff, you've got to look tidy.

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So what are the folks of Wales wearing to look lush?

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The girls in Cardiff are famous for heels, fake tan, glitz and glam.

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There seems to be a lot more make-up lately.

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It's getting darker by the day.

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Tell me about your eyelashes. Are these semi-permanent ones?

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Individuals, yeah. You put one on, then two, and before you know it,

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you've got, like, ten on.

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That is not natural.

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It's not natural, but it's me.

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-Your head looks like an Easter egg.

-Really?

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What would you do to rid the world of fakery in Cardiff?

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I wouldn't, to be honest, because look at this.

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I've got more make-up on than half the girls.

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Now for teenager Jake, whose tidemarks aren't only showing up

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-on the bath.

-Hello, I'm Jake,

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I'm from south-east London and I'm 17 years old.

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# I am what I am... #

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The product I couldn't live without has got to be fake tan.

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I don't think I'm quite orange. But I don't think I'm quite fully brown.

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I would class myself as borange.

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I don't fake tan my whole body cos I don't see the point in

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fake tanning bits you can't see.

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I get asked if I'm Indian or mixed race.

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I'm like, "No, I'm white." And they're like, "What?!"

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It's not a normal skin colour.

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When I was younger, I used to get bullied.

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Then I started putting weight on.

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If you asked me to think about what I looked like at 16,

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I would cry because I was so fat, I was so ugly.

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Didn't wear make-up. I was just not confident in myself.

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Jake started changing about a year ago.

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He lost five stone in weight and he came out.

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# I'm coming out... #

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Coming out definitely was the best thing I ever did.

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He came out screaming. Literally, screaming. Fanfare, the lot.

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Since then, he has just got more and more make-up.

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More and more fake tan.

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The things that really bug me - his hair dye.

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How he gets it on the wall, I don't know.

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And he's also got make-up he's stolen from his sister and myself.

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I would love to see the borange gone. And just be plain Jake.

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POD, please, please get rid of all the fakery

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and just bring my Jakey back.

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Hi, POD, you might think this is borange, but this is my natural look.

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Deal with it.

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I'm here to meet Jake in a vintage shop, but I'm a bit worried

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all the patterns will be too much for him to resist.

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I'm going to get in there and stop him.

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No, back away from the patterns, you have enough on, my friend.

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Come with me.

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This tan is strong, dude.

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It's not that bad.

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Give me your hand. It's so dark. Is this standard every day?

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Yeah, this is every day. It's 20, 25 layers of fake tan.

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-Sorry, what?

-25 layers.

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-25 layers?!

-Yeah.

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Rarely have I met someone who is more in need of an intervention.

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HE LAUGHS

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This is craziness!

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Do you think that you coming to see POD is part of you

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changing from the boy at school? You've morphed into this and

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you want to move a step forward beyond that?

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Yeah, I want to get taken more seriously, if you know what I mean.

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I want to morph into a new me. But still be confident.

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-A natural, grown-up you.

-Yeah.

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-I've got a quiz for you.

-OK.

-Are you ready?

-Yeah!

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It's to try and work out if you really are ready to be

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an adult or if you are still a bit of a kid.

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I'll aim for that adult section.

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OK, do you watch cartoons or cookery shows?

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Cartoons.

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Sophisticated espresso or a lovely carton of orange juice with a straw?

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I don't know what an espresso is, so orange juice.

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Spaghetti Hoops on toast or foie gras?

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-S'ghetti on toast.

-S'ghetti?

-Yeah. I always call it that, sorry.

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OK, so, after my quiz, you are a massive child, I think.

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HE CHEERS

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But we will change that. Are you ready to go see POD?

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-I'm ready to go see POD.

-Come, follow me, my friend.

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-Am I going to have brown hands now?

-Probably.

-Gross! Get inside.

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Go, go, go!

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Hi, POD, let me in.

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I am POD, the Personal Overhaul Device. Who are you?

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Hi, POD, I'm Jake.

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Have you fallen into a muddy puddle?

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That is just so rude.

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My sensors detect 25 layers of fake tan.

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Why do you want to look like this?

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I think I look nice and brown.

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I don't want to look like a piece of paper.

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Has a pigeon pooed on your fringe?

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These are my extensions - you should get a pair.

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Fake violation. Activate emergency screen wipe.

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Can you tell POD what you would like to do for a living?

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I want to be a hairdresser and make-up artist.

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How can you be a make-up artist if you don't know what subtlety is?

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Excuse me! I do. I am actually smart. I know what subtlety means.

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Whatever it is. Yeah, I do.

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There's a rat living in your hair. I can't see its tail.

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You need rodent killer, not shampoo.

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Oh, my God!

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Our friendship was sky-high and now it's hit rock bottom.

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That is just so rude.

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Would you like to hear what the public make of your look?

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I'm a bit scared, but go for it.

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I asked the general public,

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"Would you like to snog, marry or avoid this boy?"

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What do you think they said?

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I think, well, I hope they said snog or marry,

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but that's probably not right. I'm just dreaming there.

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So, avoid.

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I would avoid him because

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his eyebrows and hair are a little bit too much for me.

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I don't care, it's fine. His eyebrows are too boring.

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I would avoid him, because his look is way too crazy.

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That's a good thing. Since when has crazy been bad?

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I would avoid him because he looks like he got dressed in the dark.

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Oh, my God, who are these people? They are so rude!

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100% of the public said they would avoid you.

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No way. That is making me feel so ugly.

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POD computes you are a calamity of colour clashes and

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you need my..

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Bit harsh. Little bit harsh, but it's the truth.

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It's time to run the deep cleanse.

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Oh, no!

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# Cos you're filthy... #

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I want all of your bangles and bracelets.

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# And I'm gorgeous... #

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Can I go home now?

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Now get rid of those ridiculous rats' tails.

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# Ooh, and I'm gorgeous... #

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Time to remove all of your make-up.

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Hold up that wipe, Jake.

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Run the make-under in three, two, one...

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Oh, my God.

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I kind of like it, actually. I think I look nice.

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POD computes you look amazing. Look how lovely your eyes are.

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Thank you!

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I like it. I feel quite happy.

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I didn't think I could look natural or nice.

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Earlier, we heard what the public thought about your previous look.

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What did they say?

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That they would all avoid me.

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This time, I showed them a picture of what you look like now.

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Here's what they said.

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I would snog him, because he looks very approachable and trendy

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and very well-groomed.

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Go, me - check me out!

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I would marry him, because he seems very stylish and pleasant.

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Everything I want in a husband, really.

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Check me out. I am just so cool.

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I think I would probably marry him,

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because he looks like a confident and go-getting young gentleman.

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Yay!

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Now, 50% of the public want to snog you

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and the other 50% want to marry you.

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I feel well good. I feel really proud of myself now.

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I know that sounds weird, but I do.

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Are you ready to show your mum your new look?

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Yeah, I'll strut my thing.

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POD computes my work here is done.

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Stay in contact with me. Text me.

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Initiate Podwalk.

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The Podwalk has been beamed into a Cardiff Bar, and Jake's ready

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to let his friends and family see his radical new look.

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I'm really excited to go on the catwalk

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and show everyone my new look.

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But I don't know how they're going to react.

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I don't know if they'll like it or not. I hope they do. Fingers crossed.

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THEY CHEER

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What do you think?

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I absolutely love it. I really do. You're so good-looking.

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-You are.

-No.

-Please, please, please keep it.

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What do you think about the clothes?

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I think they're gorgeous. Nothing to hide you. It's all fitted.

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No more big, baggy shirts. I really do love it.

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Do you feel a bit more grown-up?

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A little bit. I think I look older like this.

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I think I could rock the natural look as well.

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-I think you are rocking it, my friend.

-Thank you! So are you.

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Oh, thanks!

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THEY LAUGH

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So when I meet up with you in a couple of weeks...?

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-Yeah, I'll be au naturel. Pinky promise.

-OK.

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POD computes Jake's been transformed from a borange boy into boy band cool.

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Absolutely love Jake's new look. He looks so handsome now.

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I think it will give him more confidence to realise

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that he doesn't have to dress way out to get attention.

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And I think eventually he'll finally find a boyfriend.

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I feel natural for the first time in God knows how long. I'm excited now.

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It's like a new me.

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Yo, check out the girls in Cardiff!

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Their sparkle is blinding here in da hood,

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cos they're lovin' the bling and it ain't right. You get me?

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There's loads of bling in Cardiff. We wear it.

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It doesn't matter how much, you've got huge earrings on.

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They wear huge necklaces. Huge bracelets. It's not one or the other.

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I love a bit of bling.

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Do you have bling-type dandruff?

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This is fashion. These are my studs, POD.

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BOTH: We love bling!

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Hi, POD.

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Why's everything weird in here? What's the matter?

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Ellie, my style sensors are going completely bonkers.

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-Why?

-Because of all the bling.

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-What, do you mean jewellery?

-Yes, the bling, the horrible bling.

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I need you to do whatever you can to calm down my style sensors.

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Ellie, figure out what's going on with all this bling.

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That means I have to inhabit the look,

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and I don't really wear jewellery.

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OK, well, do your best, Ellie.

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All right, I suppose. I might have a couple of bits.

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Do I look really cool or like a Bond villain?

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-Oh, my!

-THEY LAUGH

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Would you want to do smoochy-smoochy with this?

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-Maybe.

-I would!

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This is powerful.

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-It really livens up a family photo.

-I bet it does.

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Mum, Dad, me.

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It doesn't quite fit, but I don't think anyone's noticed.

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What do you think of this?

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The accessories on your wrist seem to do it for me.

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-Some would call them bracelets. Accessories for your wrist.

-Exactly.

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SHE BEATBOXES

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I don't know why I'm doing that. I haven't got a mic.

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I'm just spitting on my hand.

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-RAPS:

-I'm here in Cardiff, it's really, really cold

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I'm here with Jimmy James

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I don't know what rhymes with Jimmy James

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And end strong.

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It's not very gangsta to have a lisp.

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You should not be focusing on anything else right now,

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apart from the girl looking awesome.

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-HE LAUGHS

-Do you like it?

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There's quite a lot there. But yeah, that's cool.

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Are you saying that about my jewellery or something else?

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Cos you proper clocked my chest there.

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-Oh, sorry!

-Unbelievable. Honestly, this look.

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Just men at me all the time.

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Now for Whitney, who spends half of her day in the loo.

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Thankfully, nothing to do with a dodgy curry -

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she's just a massive fan of the slap.

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Hi, my name's Whitney.

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I'm a blonde, bronze, big-boobed bombshell from Crewe.

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# Look at me... #

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My fakery is my hair. Make-up, eyelashes, earrings, fake tan.

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Nails. Everything apart from these.

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# Look at me... #

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# Working nine to five... #

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I used to have a job working in a call centre.

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If she's going to be three hours late for work, four hours late,

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five hours late for work, it's not important as long as she looks right.

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So, yeah, it kind of resulted in the sack.

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SHE LAUGHS

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I'm incredibly worried about Whitney's future,

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because I can't see that this is ever going to end.

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She's getting faker and faker and faker.

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My hair is a wig. It's synthetic, but I don't care. It looks natural.

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I think, anyway. Even though it's bleach blonde.

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She feels the need to have her boobs out all the time.

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Male attention is the reason I dress the way I do.

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I do get a lot of wolf whistles, a lot of winks.

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If I was natural-looking, I wouldn't get the attention,

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I know for a fact I wouldn't.

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I just don't think I'm a natural beauty.

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POD, will you please bring back my baby girl?

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POD, do you really think you're going to change this bronze,

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blonde, big-boobed bombshell? Behave!

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I'm meant to be meeting Whitney here, but I think she must be

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fiddling with her wig or something, cos she's running quite a bit late.

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Maybe I could... Maybe I could try on some wigs.

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# California gurls, we're unforgettable... #

0:16:360:16:40

# Do you believe in life after love? #

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MUSIC: "Theme From Charlie's Angels"

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Whitney the wig queen, it's lovely to meet you.

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-Hello.

-So is that a wig you have on at the minute?

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It is. Yes. I just literally clip it on my head,

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put the headband on and straighten the fringe. Done.

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That doesn't take very long. What about the rest of you?

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How long does that take to do?

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It takes about three and a half hours.

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Whitney, you're obsessed.

0:17:090:17:11

I know. I don't really have any confidence without my make-up.

0:17:110:17:14

In comparison to my friends, they've got the jaw line,

0:17:140:17:17

the cheekbones, all petite. They're all tiny.

0:17:170:17:21

Pixie-looking. Very cute and small. I'm the opposite.

0:17:210:17:26

All I've got is just the make-up and the hair.

0:17:260:17:30

Would you not leave the house without everything on like this?

0:17:300:17:33

This is the very minimum that I'd leave the house with at all.

0:17:330:17:36

But if I pushed you out the front door....

0:17:360:17:38

I'd have to rugby tackle you back into the door.

0:17:380:17:42

-Just smash the window and break back in.

-Possibly.

0:17:420:17:46

Whitney, I have a quiz for you.

0:17:460:17:47

Do you spend more time doing your make-up or with your family?

0:17:470:17:49

My make-up.

0:17:490:17:51

But does your lipstick give you a hug?

0:17:510:17:53

-It gives me a kiss.

-THEY LAUGH

0:17:530:17:57

Do you spend more time doing your make-up or watching

0:17:570:17:59

the soaps on the telly?

0:17:590:18:01

-Make-up. Only just.

-Do you spend more time doing your make-up or gossiping with friends?

0:18:010:18:06

-Make-up.

-SHE LAUGHS

0:18:060:18:09

-That is the most disturbing thing.

-I know.

0:18:090:18:11

Every single answer was make-up.

0:18:110:18:13

You are terrible. I know.

0:18:130:18:15

Right, we have no time to waste. Are you ready to come to POD?

0:18:150:18:18

-Yes.

-Come on. Let's do it.

0:18:180:18:19

-I'm going to help you up, madam.

-Thank you.

0:18:190:18:23

Hi, POD, it's Whitney. Please let me in.

0:18:230:18:26

I am POD, the Personal Overhaul Device. Who are you?

0:18:320:18:37

Hi, POD, I'm Whitney.

0:18:370:18:38

Don't look now, but you have a couple of bald men in a headlock.

0:18:380:18:42

SHE LAUGHS

0:18:420:18:44

POD computes that you have layers and layers of slap on.

0:18:440:18:48

Yes.

0:18:480:18:50

Have you brought all your make-up into POD?

0:18:500:18:52

-Maybe.

-SHE LAUGHS

0:18:520:18:55

Show it to me, then.

0:18:550:18:56

Spray tan.

0:18:560:18:58

More tan.

0:18:580:19:00

And sticky tape.

0:19:000:19:02

Whitney, what is that for?

0:19:020:19:04

For my eye shadow, so it creates a really sharp effect.

0:19:040:19:06

Put it all back again.

0:19:060:19:09

Excess baggage detected.

0:19:090:19:12

If you continue along this fakery footpath,

0:19:120:19:15

your addiction is going to go out of control. Like this.

0:19:150:19:19

SHE LAUGHS

0:19:190:19:21

What do you think of that?

0:19:210:19:23

I like the colour. I do.

0:19:230:19:26

Carry on with this fakery and your hair will get

0:19:260:19:28

so big, you'll get snow on the top of it.

0:19:280:19:31

Ooh!

0:19:310:19:33

Shall we see what other people think of your look?

0:19:330:19:36

OK, POD.

0:19:360:19:38

Run the public analysis.

0:19:380:19:40

I asked the general public,

0:19:420:19:44

would they want to snog, marry or avoid this girl?

0:19:440:19:46

What do you think they said?

0:19:460:19:48

-Snog.

-Let's see what their comments are.

0:19:480:19:51

I would avoid her.

0:19:510:19:52

She has too much make-up round her eyes, and is quite fake-looking.

0:19:520:19:56

Yes, nothing too insulting there, that's fine.

0:19:560:19:59

I would definitely avoid her, because she looks really intimidating.

0:19:590:20:03

Yes! I am.

0:20:030:20:06

I would only snog her if I was really drunk.

0:20:060:20:09

Oh.

0:20:090:20:12

In fact, 30% of the public do indeed want to snog you,

0:20:120:20:16

but a whopping great 70% of the public want to

0:20:160:20:20

get as far away from you as possible.

0:20:200:20:22

Oh.

0:20:220:20:23

POD computes you are a wig-wearing, fake, fanatical total timewaster,

0:20:230:20:27

and I'm going to nip this in the bud with my...

0:20:270:20:30

Fair enough, bring it.

0:20:350:20:38

Run the deep cleanse.

0:20:380:20:40

# If I could turn back time... #

0:20:430:20:45

Put on your deep cleanse uniform and cover up those boobs, please.

0:20:450:20:48

# If I could find a way... #

0:20:480:20:50

-Let's have that wig.

-No!

0:20:500:20:52

Come on, Whitney.

0:20:520:20:53

# I'd take back all the words that hurt you... #

0:20:530:20:56

Ah, God!

0:20:560:20:57

And I want those eyelashes.

0:20:570:20:59

You're kidding!

0:20:590:21:00

Come on, we haven't got three and a half hours now.

0:21:000:21:03

Now, take the face wipes and remove all of your make-up.

0:21:030:21:07

I look like an egg.

0:21:070:21:09

Run the make-under in three, two, one...

0:21:090:21:13

SHE GASPS

0:21:190:21:21

Oh, no way!

0:21:240:21:26

It's different.

0:21:270:21:28

Do you like it?

0:21:280:21:30

Yes, surprisingly. I can't stop smiling.

0:21:300:21:34

How does this new look compare to your old one?

0:21:340:21:37

I think the old look was a lot tackier.

0:21:370:21:41

I think this one shows confidence, style,

0:21:410:21:45

like I'm comfortable in my own skin.

0:21:450:21:48

Previously, I showed the public a picture of you wearing your old look

0:21:480:21:51

and I asked them if they'd like to snog, marry or avoid you.

0:21:510:21:54

-What did they say?

-Mainly avoid. 70% avoid. 30% snog.

0:21:540:21:59

I've now shown the public a picture of you looking like this.

0:21:590:22:02

-Would you like to hear what they said?

-Oh, OK.

0:22:020:22:05

I'd marry her, because she's got brilliant skin,

0:22:050:22:08

very good fashion sense and looks really fun to be around.

0:22:080:22:12

Aw!

0:22:120:22:14

I think I'd give her a cheeky snog, because she has a nice smile,

0:22:140:22:18

and I like her hair.

0:22:180:22:20

Aw, bless! Thank you.

0:22:200:22:22

I'd snog her, because she's really good-looking

0:22:220:22:24

and she's got a good physique.

0:22:240:22:26

-SHE LAUGHS

-No way! Thank you!

0:22:260:22:31

70% of the public do want to snog you. And the rest want to marry you.

0:22:310:22:35

Aw!

0:22:350:22:37

Are you ready to strut your stuff and show the world your natural beauty?

0:22:370:22:40

I am, POD, definitely.

0:22:400:22:42

Initiate Podwalk.

0:22:420:22:44

Whitney's ready to let her family and friends see her fresh new look.

0:22:460:22:50

I am very, very, very, very nervous at the moment

0:22:500:22:53

to walk down the catwalk with a new look.

0:22:530:22:56

I'm hoping for a big thumbs up from everyone.

0:22:560:22:58

THEY CHEER

0:22:580:23:01

Thank you.

0:23:230:23:25

Michelle, what do you think?

0:23:250:23:27

I think she looks absolutely fantastic.

0:23:270:23:30

The wig, the extensions have gone. And now she looks normal. Fantastic.

0:23:300:23:35

I think it looks lovely.

0:23:350:23:36

Do you think with this look you can still stand out

0:23:360:23:38

amongst your friends?

0:23:380:23:40

Yeah, I think I'm a lot more smiley. Big smiles. Big, bright eyes.

0:23:400:23:43

I can be Whitney with this. Definitely.

0:23:430:23:46

Do you think you're going to stop spending three,

0:23:460:23:48

four hours in the morning?

0:23:480:23:50

Yeah, definitely.

0:23:500:23:51

What are you going to do with all your spare time?

0:23:510:23:53

-Look for a job!

-Yes, that's good!

0:23:530:23:56

She's turned into the perfect daughter. What's going on?!

0:23:560:23:59

POD computes Whitney's been transformed from a brash broad

0:24:000:24:03

to a natural beauty.

0:24:030:24:05

The reaction from the audience was amazing.

0:24:050:24:08

It was very loud, very upbeat.

0:24:080:24:10

That's the biggest confidence boost you can have.

0:24:100:24:13

I'm happy about this now. Yeah, definitely.

0:24:130:24:16

Not only does she look fantastic, she was really smiling from ear to ear,

0:24:160:24:20

which tells me that she genuinely likes what she saw.

0:24:200:24:23

And I'm hoping that this is here for good.

0:24:230:24:26

Cardiff girls are creating double trouble fakery - not content

0:24:290:24:33

with one colour, they're dip dying their hair and going two tone.

0:24:330:24:36

In Cardiff, is dip dying a big thing?

0:24:360:24:39

Everyone has dip dyed hair.

0:24:390:24:40

It started off quite subtle with a little bit of blonde on the ends.

0:24:400:24:43

But there's always people who take it to an extreme.

0:24:430:24:46

Your hair looks like it's on fire.

0:24:460:24:47

That's the look I'm going for.

0:24:470:24:49

-I'm not a big fan of that, to be honest.

-Why?

0:24:490:24:52

It looks like they just haven't had their roots done.

0:24:520:24:54

I just really wonder what goes through people's minds.

0:24:540:24:57

Like, those people with half pink, half purple.

0:24:570:24:59

Jake wore all the fake tan in the world,

0:25:050:25:07

while Whitney spent all the time in the world doing her make-up.

0:25:070:25:10

Both left POD looking amazing.

0:25:100:25:13

But did they keep their looks?

0:25:130:25:15

-Hi.

-Hi.

0:25:160:25:18

Right, Miss Whitney, we'll start with you.

0:25:180:25:20

What have you kept from your make-under?

0:25:200:25:22

I've kept my lipstick.

0:25:220:25:24

THEY LAUGH

0:25:240:25:26

Loads!

0:25:260:25:28

No, the short hair. I've not got the extensions or the wig.

0:25:280:25:32

Since the make-under, I've not touched one bit of eye shadow.

0:25:320:25:35

I've only got one set of eyelashes on.

0:25:350:25:37

A more natural set compared to what I used to wear.

0:25:370:25:40

-I think it's beautiful.

-Oh, thank you.

0:25:400:25:42

It's a little bit fake, but ssh!

0:25:420:25:45

Why do you think you wore all that make-up in the first place?

0:25:450:25:48

It was like an armour. I didn't want anyone to see the real Whitney.

0:25:480:25:51

Do you think maybe you learned from this experience that you don't

0:25:510:25:54

have to put on all the war paint,

0:25:540:25:56

because people actually quite like you as you are?

0:25:560:25:58

For the past couple of years it's been like role-play, basically.

0:25:580:26:01

I've been acting like a completely different person,

0:26:010:26:04

with all the make-up and all the hair.

0:26:040:26:06

But now it's Whitney that will spend time with the family and friends.

0:26:060:26:09

Not just thinking about her appearance constantly, 24/7.

0:26:090:26:13

Now it's just me. It's me. I'm happy.

0:26:130:26:17

Warms one's cockles.

0:26:170:26:19

Jake, to you, my friend. I think we caught it just in time.

0:26:190:26:22

I think POD has nipped it in the bud with you.

0:26:220:26:25

POD saved me.

0:26:250:26:26

Your clothes are much less bonkers than when I first met you.

0:26:260:26:31

Yeah, I got sick of all the granddad clothes.

0:26:310:26:33

I kind of had a little funeral for them, cos I burnt them.

0:26:330:26:36

You were saying about how ugly the top was. So I burnt it.

0:26:360:26:40

SHE SCREAMS

0:26:400:26:41

And now you're known as the granddad clothes killer.

0:26:410:26:44

SHE LAUGHS

0:26:440:26:46

-Did you?

-Yeah. In my garden.

0:26:460:26:49

I'm so glad, Jake, you came to us when you did.

0:26:520:26:54

Because otherwise, I don't know where you would have ended up

0:26:540:26:57

or what you would have ended up doing for more attention.

0:26:570:26:59

Strapping live animals to your head for attention.

0:26:590:27:02

THEY LAUGH

0:27:020:27:04

Do you think you've got a bit more self-confidence with how you are naturally?

0:27:040:27:07

Yeah. I get a lot of people asking me for my number.

0:27:070:27:11

I'm getting proper good attention with it now.

0:27:110:27:14

So, Jake, it's still kind of about the attention?

0:27:140:27:17

No...yeah.

0:27:170:27:18

-THEY LAUGH

-Yeah, it is.

0:27:180:27:20

-There's no fake tan, which is amazing.

-No fake tan.

0:27:200:27:23

-Cos you were a hideous colour before.

-Oh, thanks!

0:27:230:27:27

No, it was over the top. But the bottles of fake tan - in the bin.

0:27:270:27:31

Put them in the fire with all the clothes.

0:27:310:27:34

-Burn it all.

-Burn!

0:27:340:27:35

Hiya, POD.

0:27:380:27:40

Another successful day ends.

0:27:400:27:42

Yes, I managed to reveal lots and lots of natural beauty.

0:27:420:27:46

Well, well done, even though you sound slightly smug.

0:27:460:27:48

But it's never enough, Ellie, there's still plenty more to do.

0:27:480:27:51

You want to carry on - I can't, I'm afraid.

0:27:510:27:54

I'm got to go and see a lovely man called St David.

0:27:540:27:56

He wants to show me his Red Dragon. You can POD off.

0:27:560:27:59

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