May the Spoon Be with You The Apprentice USA

Last time on All-Star Celebrity Apprentice, teams were tasked

with designing a luxury suite in Brooklyn's Barclays centre.

-Go, do a beautiful job, have fun.

-OK, thank you.

On Plan B, Penn Jillette dug deep into his rolodex

for project manager Lisa Rinna.

-I will get Lisa Lampanelli.

-I like that idea.

-You want Teller?

-Yes, I want 'em all.

Penn has connections up the wazoo.

While on Team Power, project manager

Marilu Henner was consumed with the detail.

-The hell are you getting?

-I'm getting a mirror.

-OK.

-I am.

Where you going to put a mirror at?

I'm going to put a mirror in here, I want one.

-You guys...

-No, I got you, that's why I'm trying to keep you on track.

And Trace Adkins was at his wits' end.

Dude has seven more hours here!

Can't do this any more!

I feel like the substitute teacher who has the detention class.

Penn's big guns showed up for the party, and Plan B was a success...

Teller's east-Indian needle mystery!

..while Team Power played chess...

You know, what is better and more royal for a king than a chess game?

You don't normally see that at a hot, happening party.

..ensuring Lisa's second win as project manager.

Lisa, you're going to be very happy.

Your team did a far better job.

-Yes!

-That's 100,000 for St Jude.

Left in the hot seat, Trace had to defend himself.

You should fire Trace. He was very curmudgeon-y.

He dropped out three tasks ago.

Trace...what's wrong with him?

Funny, they've used my ideas on the last three tasks.

But his time wasn't up yet.

They didn't like the suite,

they didn't like the chess, and you're the project manager.

Marilu, you're fired.

Now, the final four will have to battle each other,

because tonight, two will be left standing to face their final task.

Oh, my gosh.

Here's lookin' at you, kid.

Here's lookin' at you, kid.

We have made it as far as two people

ever have without a negative word about the other.

I hear Trace's voice, so it's Marilu.

-The final four, huh?

-That's it.

-Congratulations.

Congratulations. Congratulations, Trace.

-Congratulations.

-I don't feel like I should be congratulated.

I made the final four.

Congratulations.

'To be with Trace Adkins, Penn Jillette and Lil Jon,'

I am proud. I think it's cool as can be.

Whoa, Marilu... She threw me under the bus, didn't she?

-Yeah.

-"Fire him!"

-Did she?

Yeah, she said, who do you think you should...?

Who do you, who would you fire? She said Trace.

-I'm a curmudgeon!

-She also said crabby. Curmudgeon I understood,

crabby I went, "What is he, six?"

'I've been called a lot worse than a curmudgeon,

'but I'll say this.'

I didn't come up here to just dick around, I came up here to win.

PHONE RINGS

-Uh-oh, that's Mr Trump.

-Yes? Should I answer it?

BLEEP.

-Hello.

-'Mr Trump would like you all back in the boardroom right away.'

All right, we'll be right there.

Boys, Mr Trump would like to see us back in the boardroom.

You never want to go back in the boardroom on the same night!

Let's go.

And we just went, "Uh-oh, now what?"

# Money, money, money, money

# Money!

# Money, money, money, money

# Money!

# Some people got to have it

# Yeah

# Some people really need it

# Listen to me, y'all

# Do things, do things, do things, bad things, baby

# Dollar bills, y'all

# Come on

# That mean, old lean

# Mean green

# Almighty dollar!

# I know that money

# Give me a nickel, brother, can you spare a dime?

# Money can drive some people out of their minds

# No good, no good

# Money!

# Money, money, money, money

# Money! #

Congratulations, you're the final four. You've done an amazing job.

-Thank you.

-There are no losers in this room.

Unfortunately, two of you will be fired.

Trace, why should you be in the finals?

Well, I believe there is a final task,

which, in a lot of years has been a fundraising task.

I brought two six-guns with me to this gunfight

and I may have fired five rounds.

What does that mean, exactly? You have to explain that.

I got some bullets left.

And you were the highest fundraiser

of anyone who sits in this room today.

Yes.

It's very impressive.

How did you do as project manager, Trace?

I won twice.

I think that...

How did you do overall?

Well, I was doing pretty dang good till I got over here on Power,

and then, uh, not so great.

You did five and five.

Lil Jon, why should you be in the finals?

Oh, because I'm a strong player,

I'm an excellent leader,

very creative,

excellent at marketing, branding,

and just, I'm really good at every aspect

-of this game.

-I agree, but you had a very bad record.

-Right?

-That's not totally my fault.

-Well...

-I had one and one...

-You were in

a bad team, but you did have a bad record.

-Right.

-And as project manager you lost and won.

-Yes.

I did.

-I mean, I'm pretty strong...

-Should you remain in the room?

Definitely should remain in the room.

So, Lisa, why should you be in the final two?

Well, I believe I am the second highest earner

-at 505,000.

-Correct.

And...I believe that I have fought hard and I am a great leader

and I have proven myself this time around.

I'm creative and I'm a fighter,

and I didn't give up, I came back here and I fought

and I'm sitting in this final four,

and I believe I deserve to be in the final two.

I am the second-highest earner.

Mr Trump, I think it is interesting to note that

although project managers Trace and Lisa

brought in the most money,

that I was their second when I wasn't project manager,

and, um,

I, uh...

I think that matters, that matters somewhat, too.

OK, fine.

And why should you be in the finals?

I don't think anyone handles pressure better than I do.

In my career with Teller,

we deal with, uh,

quite literally life-and-death situations

and I would, um, ask you

not to confuse, uh,

self-control and self-restraint with a lack of passion.

I want to do this as much as anyone, or more,

and I also think that being able to control one's self

is the first step, and I haven't had any conflict with anyone.

I think I've had some very good ideas,

and it seems like when it's tick-tock

and down to the last second, I don't tremble.

OK.

Trace...

..Lil Jon...

Lisa...

Penn...

you're the best of the best, and that's been a smart bunch.

But we're far from over.

And what I'm going to do right now is fire one person from each team.

You've all done a fantastic job,

and remember, there are no losers in this room.

-Ivanka?

-I guess I'd be curious to hear from each of you

what you did differently this season relative to

the first one and how it worked for you.

-I mean, Lisa...

-Especially you, Lisa!

-But it is interesting.

-She made the greatest comeback by far.

Everyone else has done well, but she really made a comeback.

I'm sure everyone learns something,

-especially watching themselves.

-It's a great question.

-I love that question.

-Great question. Well, for me, uh,

I'm a different person than I was two years go,

I would say.

And I, I had to leave my fear at home.

I had to come here fearless.

-And I think that's probably...

-Were you nervous coming the second time?

I was... I didn't want to come,

but I knew it was something that I needed to do.

-For myself...

-Because you had a bad experience the first time.

I had a really bad experience, and it scarred me.

-Was that hard on you?

-Yeah, it was.

-It was very hard.

-You're fully recovered.

-Well, I am now!

-You're a patient who has fully recovered.

-I am now.

-A lot different, right?

-A lot different.

-Oh, I see,

-so that had a big impact, being so early out.

-Yes, it did, actually.

-More than I realised.

-I can understand that.

Did you take heat?

-Yes, I did.

-Not from your husband, though.

-No, of course not.

But, yeah, of course I took heat.

You did. Yeah, I can understand.

-I did.

-Well, you won't be taking heat any longer.

How do you respond to that question, Penn? Ivanka's question.

You know, no-one has more experience collaborating than I do.

38 years working with Teller.

And I came in last time with so much experience

working in a group

and so little experience working with different people.

And I came in treating everyone like they were Teller.

And, uh, although, to me, that felt like respect,

it was also a little bit brusque and a little bit aggressive.

And this time I tried to keep the same amount of respect

but just not be quite as domineering. I mean, uh,

after 38 years, Teller and I can say anything to each other.

Four words in one idea, we can say, "That's no good",

and the other one understands everything, it's been a long time.

And now I realise this time,

I didn't change much,

except I tried to remember that everybody hadn't been

working with me for 38 years.

Lil Jon, respond to that question.

Um, I think this time I'm motivated for more personal reasons.

-Why?

-My mother had a stroke due to diabetes

and I didn't even know she was still suffering with her diabetes.

I just remembered her having the diabetes

when I was younger and I thought

it went in remission. And a couple of weeks

before I'm supposed to come and do the show

she had a stroke and, due to complications,

like, it affected her recovery.

Like, she still isn't able to speak and she's not conscious, really.

So, I mean, I came, you know...

People don't know how bad diabetes can be.

Yeah, it's really bad.

-People just don't understand how bad.

-I came back,

you know, I'm fighting for my mom, so I have a personal push, you know,

this time, you know,

I just have more personal motivation.

Trace, how would you respond to Ivanka's question?

I don't think I dramatically played the game any differently

than I played it the first season I was on here.

You know, I came in, I said I want to be project manager

on the first task,

and that's the way I started the game

and that's the way I've played it. I brought my A game to every task,

I've come up with the best ideas I could come up with,

but at the same time I never got sucked into any of the drama.

I kept my integrity. You know...

Honestly, I'd say that's true for everybody here.

I think you've all done amazingly and you've all kept your integrity.

Thank you.

Lil Jon, who would you fire?

Lisa or Penn?

Everybody here deserves to be here right now.

That's true, I agree. That's why they're here.

-Um...

-Who would you fire?

I guess...

I've seen Penn do a lot and I think in the last task,

I wasn't in the room, so I don't know, I might be wrong,

but it seems like Penn took over the last task.

-He did very well.

-So it seems like Lisa

might be the one I would go with,

because I just haven't seen her really just step out there

and do something, like, step up to be project manager or whatever.

Trace, who would you fire from that team?

Hm.

Uh, it would be...

-..Lisa, I would say.

-Why? Why?

Just going forward, I'm looking at the last task

and I think you ought to have...

the two big guns going at it.

And, uh, if I was really just wanting to win

the game at all costs,

I'd say, you know, let me go up against Lisa.

But I want it to be a great show,

I want it to be fireworks. I want to go against Penn.

Lil Jon, do you think Penn is stronger than Lisa?

I don't really know their team like that,

but, I mean, from what it appears to me,

I think Penn is definitely super-strong.

But Lisa is very strong, too, I mean, to do, to stay this long

after what she went through the last time,

I've been commending her every day.

I've been very impressed with her, too,

the times I've got to work with her.

-Thank you.

-I'm impressed with her, too.

-Your husband's going to be so proud of you, Lisa.

-I know.

Boy, did you make a great decision.

You probably walked around for two years like a loser, right?

You made such a great decision.

No, is that true? Did you make a good decision coming back?

I made a great decision.

I made an excellent decision coming back,

and it wasn't an easy one, but I'm really glad I made it.

Hey, Lisa, I have a question for you.

Jon sort of alluded to it a little but, he said,

"Hey, I saw Penn sort of be the star the last time", even though

you were project manager. I mean, it sounded a little bit like he was

saying maybe you were riding on Penn's coat-tails.

What do you have to say to that? How do you answer that?

This is going to be a differentiator going forward.

I don't believe that to be true.

I believe we worked as a team, a very strong team.

So I disagree with that.

Forgive me for speaking up,

but she was project manager and acted that way.

I think I helped her an awful lot,

and I think it's undeniable that I worked as hard as I could

in every task regardless of who was project manager,

but she was the leader, she was not riding on my coat-tails.

Now, Lisa, you know that I've been your biggest booster.

I've been your biggest fan.

-Other than your husband, there's no bigger fan.

-Thank you.

And I think you've done an amazing job, and you certainly are

the comeback player of the decade as far as

Celebrity Apprentice or Apprentice is concerned.

But Penn has really been the star so far,

and I really do want to see him in the final.

Lisa, you're fired.

And congratulations, great job.

-Thank you.

-Thank you very much.

-Thank you.

-I'm so sorry, Lisa.

-Aw, it's OK, baby. Thank you very much.

-DONALD JR:

-Well done, Lisa.

-You really did a great job.

-Thank you so much.

Congratulations.

-This has been awesome.

-Thank you.

And don't forget, you've won 505,000 for your charity...

-Thank you.

-..so you can be very, very proud.

-I am so proud.

-Thank you.

-Great job, Lisa.

-Thank you so much.

-Love you.

-Love you.

I came so far.

To me it was such a win-win...win, win, win situation

in so many ways. And just the message that it puts out,

I think, to everyone. Not to give up, ever.

I mean, look at how far you can come if you set your mind to it.

-OK, so, Penn, congratulations.

-Well thank you.

Trace, Lil Jon,

one of you will be fired.

Penn, who would you fire on the other team?

It would be Lil Jon. He's the only one I've not worked with,

So I don't have enough information,

and from ignorance I would go with Lil Jon.

What about Trace?

Uh, Trace, from the beginning, from the first day I met him,

I thought he was the strongest, he was fabulous.

But Lil Jon I've never worked with, so it's an unfair answer.

So, Trace, after admitting that you checked out for three weeks,

and you sort of did,

why should I choose you to be in the finals?

Marilu said I checked out, I didn't say I checked out,

I just said I wasn't in love with the ideas I'd come up with.

And I wasn't, I mean, it's not for lack of trying,

I just haven't hit home runs.

Should they have used your ideas?

Did they make a mistake in not using your ideas?

They did use my ideas.

They used my ideas on every task for the last four tasks,

they were always my ideas.

I just didn't think they were the best ones

I'd ever come up with, and that happens sometimes.

And tomorrow, maybe it'll be better,

you know, but you don't give up just because...

Why should I keep you over Lil Jon?

Well, uh...

..I just think that, going forward,

that I'm going to bring big guns to the last show, that's all I know.

I'm going to go out on that stage and put

a boot in somebody's ass.

That's what I've been playing towards the whole time.

Lil Jon, that's a very good answer. How do you respond to that?

I'm similar, like, um,

I look at myself as, when I'm put under pressure,

I can change direction if I need to and adjust

and adapt to the situation and roll with the punches

and still complete the task.

I feel I'm very strong, very intelligent, underestimated...

-And...

-I don't think you're underestimated any more,

to be honest with you.

I think maybe in the first season, you may have been, years ago,

but you've proven yourself to me,

you've proven yourself to a lot of people.

-Thank you.

-You're a smart guy, you've done an amazing job.

So we're going to have a big task next week.

Do you think you're going to bring in money,

do you think you're going to bring in star power?

-I can bring in money, I can bring in star power.

-Who would the star power be that you'd bring in?

I don't know, it depends on what kind of task it is.

You have to kind of cater the celebrity

to the task that you're dealt.

Well, a lot of the victory is going to be who you bring in.

One of the reasons your team lost last time is because

-it wasn't the same as what Penn was able to bring in.

-Right.

-You understand that.

-Yeah.

I'm going to do everything in my power to bring celebrities

to whatever the event is.

I got some bullets left in my gun, too.

Who would you bring in, star power?

Who do you think you'd be able to bring in, Trace?

-Everybody I could, I mean...

-They all want to be on the show.

I have all their phone numbers.

The good news is, it's easy. They all want to be on the show,

so in that sense it's really very easy.

Trace, you seem a little bit quiet, a little but more subdued.

You get the opportunity to talk about who you'd be bringing in,

isn't now the time to really impress?

I know everybody that's a star in Nashville.

I know 'em all. So I'll bring as many of em as I can possibly get.

I'm not going to limit myself or I'm not going to...

..make too grandiose a promise.

So, Lil Jon, what's Trace's biggest weakness?

I think Trace's weakness is

sometimes he's a little distant from the team.

Like, he doesn't show a lot of his weaknesses.

-If he has 'em, he doesn't show 'em all.

-OK.

-That's good.

-But I'm not scared of anyone.

-I know you're not.

-I can go up against anyone.

-I can see that.

I can, I can bet on that.

Trace, what do you think of what Lil Jon just said about you?

He's correct. He can't find my weakness.

You sort of said that, Lil Jon. It's OK, it's a complement.

What about Lil Jon, what's his weakness, Trace?

I just don't know if, going forward, he'll bring in the names.

I don't know, I mean,

it's not always as easy to get 'em here as you think it is.

That's interesting.

Penn, I guess I'd like to hear from you. You can't probably speak to

Lil Jon as quite as easily, but knowing you're friends with Trace,

what do you see as his biggest weakness?

Uh, I think that Trace's...

..biggest weakness is, uh, he,

he occasionally fades.

He is the smartest, he is the best player, he understands the game,

but occasionally he will pull back a little bit.

I don't know if that's strategy, I don't know if that's, uh...

emotional.

So I would say that that's the only weakness I saw and...

He has really good ideas.

He's really smart.

He really knows what's going on.

Lil Jon, how do I get over the fact

that you lost as project manager?

-Now, Trace was 2-0, he won both times as project manager...

-Right.

..and as project manager you lost and won.

-Yes.

-And you won 40,000,

he won 710,000, so that's a big difference.

-Well, I mean, he went first, he went first...

-And he had a better team.

And he had a better team, he picked his team.

-By the way, which is a great tribute to him.

-Right.

-He picked his team.

-Um...

-I brought in...

-Would you give him credit for picking that team,

which was a good team, that I took him away from his own team?

Yeah, I definitely can give him credit.

Would you give yourself credit for that, Trace?

The man that's left in here is the guy that I picked first.

Because I knew that he and I together

were going to be formidable. Unstoppable.

Lil Jon, how do I get over the fact

that he raised more money than anybody?

That he had a great record,

that he had a fantastic project manager record, undefeated,

and you WERE defeated?

-It's tough, right?

-I mean, I've still been a tough player.

You can't judge me on my team.

If you're a superstar on a losing team,

you can't do nothing about that

-till they give you a good supporting cast.

-That could be true.

I agree. Ivanka, go ahead.

-I think this is very difficult.

-Very tough.

-I think that...

-Very tough.

-..you're both incredibly intelligent

and couldn't be more different in terms of style.

Yet you're both highly creative.

So, I think you bring a lot of the same skillset to the table

but you do so in a totally different way.

I agree!

Well, what I'm going to do is very tough for me, I'll be honest.

Because I think you're both outstanding.

I think Penn is outstanding, but I think you're both outstanding.

And...

we have to never lose sight of the fact

that the Celebrity Apprentice/Apprentice,

which is one of the most successful shows on television,

has great credibility,

and it is about winning, and it is about record.

And his record HAS been better than your record.

What I'm going to do is, because I believe so much

in what you're doing for diabetes,

I'm going to give you an extra 20,000.

-I think you are absolutely fantastic, Lil Jon.

-Thank you.

But you're fired.

-Thank you.

-You did a fantastic job, thank you.

-Congratulations, bro.

-Thank you.

-Congratulations.

Well done, Jon.

Good guy.

-He's a good man.

-Great guy.

I wish I'd gotten to work with him.

I would have loved to have been in the final two,

I want to go in there and kick the boardroom table over,

because I'm supposed to be in the final two.

But, you know what? I played a great game

and I stepped up when needed, so,

you can tweet Mr Trump right now and tell him

I should have been in the final two. Why don't y'all do that?

Congratulations, you've done a fantastic job.

You're in the finals of Celebrity Apprentice All-Star.

You really competed against some very talented, wonderful people,

but some really talented people.

Smart people.

You're going to win a lot of money for your charity.

250,000 at least. That's big money.

And it could be substantially more than that.

So, good luck, go back to your suite.

I'll see you tomorrow morning at the Trump building at 40 Wall Street.

We're going to have some fun.

-All right.

-Thank you.

-Thank you so much.

-Great going.

-Well done, guys.

We're going to fight here first? No, you go ahead.

This is probably the biggest final you've ever had.

-Oh, by far.

-By a lot!

200lb and about six inches!

-Good.

-Let's go, baby.

-Let's do it.

The biggest finalists there are, it's true.

I hate to say I told you so.

PENN LAUGHS

You love to say I told you so.

Ah.

This is the way I wanted it from day one,

A lot of champagne and two non-drinkers, huh?

Yes, how about that?

I wanted to go up against Penn.

That's the reason I picked him first to be on my team, because I knew

that he and I together could make it all the way to the end of this game.

Apple cider.

Uh, I sure hope the best man doesn't win!

To the finals.

I respect Trace, I consider now, after this, Trace a friend,

but I will be the All-Star Celebrity Apprentice.

Not just the Celebrity Apprentice, the All-Star Celebrity Apprentice!

Moi.

It's just like we're two old men, sitting on the porch.

PENN LAUGHS

'I'm going to the matts on this one.'

I'm going to bring everybody I can bring.

If I can everybody in Hollywood to this son of a bitch, I'd bring 'em!

Time to find some celebrities and some money.

Good luck.

There's no saving anything for tomorrow here.

I mean, this is it.

-Good morning.

-Good morning.

-Good morning. Oh, excuse me one second.

-Ah, very good.

-I wanted you to remember that the good guy

will be in the white hat.

Very good. What do you think of that, huh?

I like it. All right.

Penn, Trace, great job.

Fired 12 people, smart people, talented people,

you're left.

Somebody's going to be the All-Star Celebrity Apprentice.

How do you feel about it, Penn?

I feel great, I'm having a great time,

and I couldn't have a better person to play with or against

than Trace, he's wonderful.

OK, now,

we're standing in one of the greatest buildings in New York.

It's called the Trump Building at 40 Wall Street.

One of my favourite tenants happens to be Duane Reade.

Duane Reade is owned by Walgreens, a fantastic company, a hot company,

and with me today from Walgreens...

-Joe?

-Continuing its rich tradition of innovation,

Walgreens introduced Delish ice cream last year.

For your last and most challenging task,

you are going to create a unique flavour

of Walgreens Delish ice cream

which will be sold in over 8,000 Walgreens

and Duane Reade locations nationwide.

Oh, boy!

When I heard we were tasked with coming up with

a new flavour of ice cream,

I thought, "Penn eats a lot of ice cream".

Advantage Penn.

In addition to creating the new flavour,

you will design the packaging, you will create a promotional video

and you will also sell up to 50 tickets for a VIP event

that you will be hosting.

My advisors are Ivanka and the great Joan Rivers.

Now, Joan, you've won, you're a great winner.

If they win, one of them will, how are they going to feel?

For the rest of your life, people will say,

"I saw you and I wanted you to win on Celebrity Apprentice."

What it does for your charity,

you can't even feel it except in your heart, it's amazing.

It's just wonderful.

Ivanka?

You'll be judged based on the following criteria.

Your ice cream's flavour,

brand messaging and creativity of

both the video and the product packaging,

overall presentation and additional money raised through ticket sales.

OK. I think you're going to need some helpers.

Let's bring 'em up!

-Nice hat!

-Thank you!

-Is this good versus evil?

-Good versus evil.

S'up, bro?

You're coming over here? I'm very glad to see that!

I'm great, thank you.

All right. I've picked your teams.

Trace, you've got Lil Jon, Gary and Marilu.

Penn, you've got Lisa, La Toya and Dennis.

How do you feel about your team?

I haven't worked with Dennis and La Toya,

so I'm thrilled to try that,

and I am SO, so glad I've got Lisa.

I can see that. That's why I gave Lisa to you.

Thank you. That's very kind of you.

That's all I worried about all last night.

-Trace, how do you feel about your team?

-Feel good about it.

I've worked with Jon enough, and of course Marilu.

If we're going to have some kind of an event,

I've got the event goddess with me.

And then Gary, what can you say, you know, he's a legend.

Gary's doing great.

I picked the teams because

I really think they are going to be incredible,

and you have all done an amazing job.

There are no losers in this line,

that I can tell you. OK, the winner

is going to win 250,000 for your charity.

All right? Go get em.

OK, so this is our station.

These are all ingredients that we get to play with.

We can start with a base. You know,

a base like vanilla, chocolate, peanut butter.

What flavour you thinking of, homie?

What's your flavour?

'This is the real deal. We are tasked with'

coming up with an ice cream flavour

and then we make a 60-second commercial about it...

-Jon, you're going to direct the video.

-Really?!

'..and then we have to have an event'

to present this new ice cream flavour to the public.

We all need to start trying to determine

how many tickets we're each going to need.

Each ticket has to go for as much as we can get.

Right.

I'm going to sell mine from anywhere

from 5,000 to a quarter of a million dollars apiece.

Hey, Nancy, hi!

I'm good, did you get my message?

At the end of this task, the winner is going to receive,

in addition to what you raised on your own,

another quarter of a million dollars.

And if I win, the money goes to the American Red Cross.

Last year I was out of town when my house burned,

and the Red Cross was there when I couldn't be there.

They looked after the, uh,

the emotional and physical wellbeing of my family

after a house fire, and I was 2,000 miles away.

There is no more noble...

..charity in this country than the American Red Cross.

It's not even an option.

-Losing is not even an option in this deal.

-I know.

-Oh, look at this!

-Oh, it's a kitchen!

It's a kitchen! How exciting!

We're going to be working here, look at all the products.

Penn, these are the ingredients we're going to be working with.

It's a whole different kind of feeling on the final task.

What's your favourite flavour of ice cream, Dennis?

The typicals.

I hate to say this, but I'm a chocolate and vanilla guy.

It's a game up until now, and now for the final task

it really is about the charity,

and when I win, that's another quarter million

that'll go to Opportunity Village,

and I want to give them that money, I really do.

I think I can, I have a good shot. I get Vegas.

Vegas can beat Nashville, right? Sure!

Can I take a moment with your attention?

My charity is Opportunity Village.

-OK.

-And in the early '60s, Wayne Newton, Elvis Presley

and Colonel Parker

were very concerned about people with intellectual disabilities.

The idea of Opportunity Village

was to take these people, and they'd build kitchens

and they'd build restrooms and teach them

-to do jobs.

-Oh, how sweet.

-And they'd go out into society.

The jobs that you would never take are the jobs they desperately want.

Penn sat us down and really shared with us

the genesis of Opportunity Village.

The fact that Elvis started this

and that Wayne Newton is a part of it,

these are, like, icons.

-It's Elvis' charity, man.

-Wow.

-That's wonderful.

Think about every one of those scarves,

every one of those scarves was made at Opportunity Village.

They would be sewed by them and Elvis would kiss it

and it went out to the fans.

I'm sorry, this makes me cry. I mean,

the pride of someone who has a job...

Excuse me. ..working in a kitchen is greater than the pride of

winning an Academy Award.

Excuse me, I'm so sorry.

Don't cry.

To see him get vulnerable,

that's what it's all about. That's why we're here.

I love that, I didn't know that's what it was.

So that's what Opportunity Village is.

And...it's Elvis' charity!

I know!

And...it's Elvis' charity!

Trace is going to do down home.

Yeah, and you gotta go the other way.

I would really like to tie it in with Vegas and with magic.

We've got to design an ice cream flavour.

So the one flavour has to be presented by six o'clock.

And that's going to be based on what the customers like better.

Then we have to also make an up to 60-second video

launching our ice cream flavour.

What Teller and I are known for, you know, is Vegas.

I think that in the commercial we're going to use Penn & Teller.

And four showgirls.

Shut up!

We then have to host the whole thing, raising money,

selling 50 tickets to this ice cream social

to make as much money as we can.

It's an ice cream social.

Ice cream social, Vegas-style.

Ice cream social, Vegas-style. Excellent.

Now, uh, door prizes,

you got any great door prizes?

I would think, like, a sports door prize?

-This is where I come in at.

-I would think!

'Trace has a good, solid plan.'

He's not going to make dirt ice cream.

He's not going to just plain screw the pooch.

So there's a lot to do.

Oh, boy! She's got ice cream!

Oh, that's some good eatin'.

-You want a big spoon!

-What are you doing?

We have such a lovely ice cream wizard and her name is Katie,

and I like the idea that we have a wizard,

because Penn is all about magic.

Penn is really passionate about the macadamia nuts.

-And the caramel.

-And the caramel.

-Butter pecan is really good.

-I love that!

-But I'm thinking Sin City.

Yeah, yeah, I like that.

We get to do two flavours, then you get to pick one.

Sin City, buttery, pecan...

is one of them.

This is Sin City without a gamble.

-That's good.

-'But the second flavour of ice cream,

'we're struggling with it.'

Vegas Magic Gold.

We have a little chocolate piece that looks like a turtle.

Oh, they're cute, look at... They're like little baby turtles!

They are!

-And it's filled with caramel.

-Caramel chocolate in vanilla?

Chocolate makes a difference. It's vanilla base, chocolate swirl...

-Or revel.

-..and Turtle pieces.

-And Turtle pieces.

Is that the one with the swirl?

Cos we could name it Vegas Magic Swirtle!

-Swirtle!

-Swirtle!

What a cute idea!

We could name it Vegas Magic Swirtle!

It's the one with the swirl!

-Swirtle!

-Swirtle!

-Swirtle!

-Swirtle, it's a swirtle!

-You are a genius!

-Swirtle!

-Swirtle!

When La Toya said "swirtle",

which was the swirl of the chocolate,

with the -rtle of the turtle, I was thrilled to pieces.

I think that might be my new favourite word.

Swirtle!

I think we all do our happy dance.

Dennis, can you play our little happy dance?

-No.

-No!

We had two things going on, but with magic swirtle I felt

the groove, I felt the needle go...and just fall right in there.

I'm loving the swirtle.

What if we get to our taste test and people go, "I hate this"?

We kill ourselves.

LAUGHTER

Let's just go all, just as decadent as we can be.

We've got peanut butter, the chocolate, the caramel,

the strawberry, peanut butter, uh, buttercream...

'We had our dedicated ice cream wizard, Logan.'

Logan was there to help us develop

the flavour that we wanted to do.

If we're going to go dairy, let's go dairy.

Load it up with that buttercream.

-It's butter fat.

-Yeah, you could do buttercream...

-Just put fat in it.

They said we gotta choose two options for the flavour.

'We have to create two different ice cream flavours'

and then we're going to let the public try 'em out

later in the day. Whichever one the public picks

is the one we'll go with.

You know those maple nut candies?

-Yup.

-That's my favourite candy.

-OK.

-What about red velvet?

-Yup.

-You've got red velvet stuff?

We've got red velvet background flavour,

we've got red velvet caramel, so we can really build you

-a lot of red velvet.

-I like red velvet cake.

-Awesome.

Yeah, let's do that. We do red velvet

-and we do maple nut, blah, blah, blah.

-OK.

'We've come down to two of my own personal favourite things.

'I like red velvet cake.'

-What is that?

-That's your red velvet.

Red velvet, look.

And my favourite candy is maple nut candy,

so we went with those two things.

I haven't tasted ice cream like this, ever.

I had a little, teeny, tiny, tiny little

minuscule scoop just to be able to taste to it.

Gary had his own pint, Gary, he was

our champion taste-tester on our team.

May the spoon be with you!

Especially when you have Delish ice cream.

# Maple Macadamia, Maple Macadamia

# Maple Macadamia, get one today! #

Gary was definitely on a sugar rush for a while.

Woo!

But what comes up must come down.

-Um...

-SNORING

I just put elephant tranquiliser in Gary's ice cream sample.

I'm going to the pet store tonight and getting a shocking collar.

For Gary.

Well, I don't know what you agree on,

-cos it seems really good to me.

-Woo!

Final task is a whopper!

I need tickets given out to where?

It's heavily celebrity-driven.

You get 50 tickets to sell for however much you want.

-You have people, Lisa?

-OK, oh, my God, it rang.

You have exactly what we need.

So, we gotta get a lot of celebrities, a lot of people here.

Thinking about my jersey and a Derek Jeter jersey.

And we've got to get ka-ching ka-ching.

OK, so, what we want to do is, we want to see our images.

I can't look at these right now, but I'll call Wayne Newton,

that should not be too long of a call.

'As far as money is concerned,'

Trace can cast a very wide net.

-'Hello.'

-Hello, can I speak to Wayne Newton, please?

This is Penn, Penn Jillette of Penn & Teller.

'I'm not wishing I'm going to win, I'm not hoping I'm going to win,'

I am working as hard as I can so I will win

250,000 to a charity that is close to my heart.

Wonderful. I am here with

Lisa Rinna, La Toya Jackson

and Dennis Rodman, I think all of whom you know.

-ALL:

-Hi, Wayne!

I am a finalist for Opportunity Village, which, of course,

is your charity,

and if you would come and deliver a big cheque from Caesars

and try some ice cream and give, you know, Mr Las Vegas

a little run in New York City. Can you do that for us Monday?

'I mean, I'm asking an awful lot'

of Wayne, an awful lot.

Well, we hope you can make it, man. We'll look forward to seeing you.

I wasn't confident that Wayne Newton could make it.

The more famous the Vegas showperson is

'the less likely they are to be hanging out in New York.'

Thanks a lot, Wayne.

-BOTH:

-Bye, Wayne!

-Bye-bye.

-Oh, he'll come.

Team Trace!

-Hey, hi!

-Hello, hello, hello!

-It smells great.

-How you doing?

Hello, my darling.

'Joan Rivers. She's a feminine mystery

'and a feminine magical powerhouse.'

She fixed her hair up like she came from another galaxy.

She goes for the jugular when it's necessary.

That's what I respect about her. She doesn't pull punches.

-And my darling.

-How are you, love?

This is, oh, look at this, this is why I'm glad I'm not in this team.

Indulge.

-Where are you along the line?

-We are either going with

a Maple Macadamia or...

red velvet is my favourite cake, so we went with the red velvet cupcake.

They're going to be....civilians tasting this stuff.

We'll watch their faces.

We'll just watch their faces and see what kind of reaction we get.

-There's three distinct parts, kind of here.

-Right.

The product, the video, which means your presentation...

-Right.

-..and then it's the big party.

-Right.

They probably have a leg up, just because...

Penn's got the biggest rolodex, ever.

Penn's got the biggest rolodex I've ever seen.

So, are you sitting down now and going through your rolodexes

-and saying...

-Yes.

-Who do you think you can get?

We're trying to do that.

So, who have you called on?

Tim McGraw turned me down, Blake Shelton. Toby's doing Leno that day,

so he's turned me down.

'Any time you're doing a fundraising task'

you're going to worry whether the donors

and the celebrities are going to show up,

'but I think I can probably compete with Penn.'

I wanted Big Show, the biggest wrestler I know, to come,

but he's in Spain.

It's very tough.

It is tough.

I think Team Trace doesn't have the star access

that Penn's team has.

I mean, country and western, Marilu,

half of her friends are dead already.

Gary Busey, I don't think his Christmas card list is gigantic.

-See you at the party.

-Yeah.

-Yes, ma'am.

-Bye.

OK, now we really have to do this.

What are the images we want?

Las Vegas, top hat, bunny.

-There's no mystery here.

-OK.

But in the bottom of the container - poof, it's gone.

Cute!

-I know I am, but it's also a good idea.

-Cute!

-I know I am but it's also a good idea.

-Cute!

Super-cute. Super-good.

One of those extra touches that you just go...

Poof, it's gone!

Or disappeared or whatever.

Those are those beautiful creative moments in advertising

and branding that just might come through you.

Poof, it's gone.

THEY LAUGH

'I think Penn is a genius writer. It just comes through him.'

He's better than anybody at it.

-Ta-da.

-Hello, Joan!

So are you all just dying cos of calories?

Takes more calories than you have just to keep me alive for a day.

Team Penn.

I love Joan Rivers. She's been there, she's done it.

To have the only female that's won Celebrity Apprentice come in

with her wisdom, I mean, please - Joan knows how to work it

like nobody's business and I admire her greatly.

Dennis, you know, is very flamboyant.

He's like a black Liberace.

LAUGHTER

-But we had great times working together.

-We sure did. We sure did.

Dennis, what you see is not what you get.

-That's right.

-Yeah, I know.

-So, happy, not happy?

-Deliriously happy, I think.

We are doing a Vegas magic theme.

-Which means? Calories disappear?

-Yeah, exactly.

-Yeah!

We have a delicious new vanilla chocolate magic "swirtle" ice cream.

And swirtle is a combination,

a little turtle candy with a swirl of chocolate.

The other one is sin city, then we got Wayne Newton coming in.

-To the party?

-Yes.

-That's amazing!

There is a small problem.

Wayne Newton said on the phone, "Count on me,"

BUT he as a parade in Arizona.

He said, "Count on me..."

This task, they want celebrities,

so the wheels are turning and you're going,

"Wow, is Wayne Newton going to make it?"

-You just don't know.

-I'll probably have, on top of that,

Debbie Harry, Dick Cavett, a few other friends coming in.

-You're all friends?

-Just like you love all the other comics.

I love all the other comics(!)

LAUGHTER

-So you guys are in very good shape, then?

-Yeah, we think so.

We think so.

You know, we were originally called Plan B and as you know,

things always crash and burn and talk to me tomorrow when

Wayne Newton's fallen through.

I think Penn's magic, Vegas concept is...brilliant.

The only negative I saw, really,

in Penn's group was that we all know celebrities say yes, yes, yes,

and then suddenly, "Well, I couldn't make it."

It's wonderful, great, I look forward to the party.

Yeah, and the ice cream. Which you will eat, what, like a half a spoon?

Whatever they put in their mouths, I would put in my mouth.

-And that's your rule for life, isn't it?

-That's my rule for life.

LAUGHTER

# Let's go

# Feeling good

# Don't believe

# What you would

# Do if you didn't have the Maple Macadamia Nut

# Hey, hey... #

HE SINGS INCOHERENTLY

OK, Gary, come on, you and I gotta go to the taste test thing.

OK.

Trace decided that he and Gary would go to do the taste test.

Really, really look at their faces.

-You know?

-Yeah. That'll give us a good signal what to do.

-Mm-hm.

So he and Gary went and I said, "Make sure you look at their faces.

"When somebody tastes the ice cream, make sure you're getting

"the reaction from the way they're responding to it."

We're going to Duane Reade,

we're going to watch them taste our ice cream.

-OK, we want to watch their faces.

-Yeah, and see which one they prefer.

I'm really good at watching people's faces, no matter what they're doing,

to get an expression off of that that I can use in

my improvisational spontaneity creative art.

-Repeat that.

-No.

GARY LAUGHS

-SHOUTING:

-We have an ice cream tasting contest!

Right back here in the corner of the store!

When it came time for us to go to the location and do

the actual taste test,

there wasn't even a question in my mind

I was going to take Gary with me.

-SHOUTING:

-Feel free to come and eat some free ice cream!

And your face will tell us how you like it!

-TRACE LAUGHS

-OK. Good.

'I was already fairly certain which one I was going to go with,

'but I wanted to see'

the reaction of these people.

Keep control of yourself. Come on, folks.

This is Red Velvet and this is Maple Macadamia Nut.

Isn't that good?

-I like it.

-That's one!

-Yummy, creamy.

When you walk through the streets, tell people how good

Delish maple ice cream is.

-Well, they can't have that yet.

-Huh?

-They can't get that yet.

-Why can't they?

-They just can't.

-Why?

-Cos we just invented it.

-Oh, we just invented it.

-You did not really just invent it.

-Yeah, we did, too.

-Liars.

Yeah, we did. Another Maple Macadamia.

Come on up, those who want a free punch of ice cream!

Which one do you like?

-Maple.

-See? All right, good.

-OK.

OK, get ready.

Change.

-That's pretty good.

-Mark down maple!

-What's your favourite?

-I like this one.

-You like the Red Velvet?

-You like Red Velvet.

-Mm-hm.

-She's a Red Velvet fan.

-OK. Red Velvet.

One woman came in, very attractive,

and she had the honest, authentic look of a Red Velvet queen.

She liked Red Velvet. Everyone else went for Maple Macadamia.

It's the Maple Macadamia. 9-1. 9-1 over Red Velvet.

-Yeah, that's the one we're going with.

-OK. All right, bye.

Yay!

# Maple Macadamia

# Maple Macadamia, get one today! #

I know you're in a hurry but it'll take two seconds just to sample it

-and tell me what you think.

-Let me give it a shot.

-OK, great.

Hold on, sorry, Melissa...

Oh. Dennis. How we doing?

Dennis and I went over to Walgreens.

We want to test the people and see which flavour they prefer -

Sin City or the Magic Swirtle.

-Can you tell me what you like about it?

-I like the fudge.

"I love the fudge."

Would you like to sample some ice cream?

-Is there a whopper in there?

-The swirtle is mixed with chocolate.

-It's so good.

-Right, right?

Can I just take the whole tub or...?

Everybody likes the chocolate.

It's very interesting when people try the ice cream,

everyone's palate is different.

-Ice cream...

-This one, it's called the swirtle.

-Did an excellent job making it.

-Thank you.

-It's creamy and delicious.

-Look at this guy.

All the people, everyone loved the Magic Swirtle.

-Did you make these?

-Yes, we did.

-Today.

-A new profession for you?

-Yes.

LAUGHTER

-I like the swirtle.

-You like the swirtle?

I thought Magic Swirtle was absolutely great and that was

my choice. I knew it would win everything.

-So who's the winner?

-Who do you think?

You can see it - the swirtle.

I should call them and let them know.

-'Hello?'

-Hi, Penn?

-Yes.

-Basically, everybody loves the swirtle. OK.

Put a couple on there.

Everybody loved the swirtle more than the other.

They loved it for being crunchy and creamy.

Report back was that people loved the swirtle.

They were digging the swirtle. They were down with the swirtle.

They were chillin' with the swirtle.

The big problem on this is it's a little hard to understand

-"swirtle" if you don't know "turtle".

-I know.

But, you know, you don't want to eat something you don't know what it is.

I don't think we have as strong a name as we thought we did.

-I hope we have really good ice cream and really a lot of money.

-Yeah.

All of a sudden I got really worried

that swirtle would be too mysterious.

-Swirtle's cute, but I'm a little...

-It is.

-It's cute.

Still felt like that swirtle was hanging out there all pink and naked

and I didn't want people to be confused.

What do you think would be stronger?

If I do think of something stronger right now I'll just kill myself.

-Don't do that.

-I mean, that's... We're stuck with swirtle.

Have we come up with any names?

Either "ravishing" or something, or something...Maple Macadamia Medley.

'I like to think of the final task as the greatest hits task.

'The first day was the ice cream flavour,

'the second was the commercial and the third was the party.

'So we had a lot to do in a very short period of time.

'And Trace knew Lil Jon was going to deliver on the commercial.'

It was just, what's the commercial going to be?

And of course that started with the flavour.

Maple Macadamia Medley. Or Mashup.

Maple Macadamia Mashup.

-That's what you said?

-Yeah, Maple Macadamia Mashup.

That's not bad.

-Match up?

-Mashup is like a mashup,

it's like, it's two things put together.

They put two totally different songs together...

-What about mix and match...?

-..mashing 'em up.

Mashup - where you take two flavours,

two songs or whatever and blend them together.

Or two anything and blend them together.

It...sounds like potatoes when I hear it.

It's not. Not to a younger crowd.

I think Marilu said mashup or Lil Jon said mashup.

Yeah, that's cool. It's perfect, actually,

because of social media, the youth element, it's perfect.

Think it should be you getting filmed on the viral video.

Like, people will tweet you doing something with the ice cream...

to the next person. I just think that makes sense.

Especially after the dog thing.

I definitely know how to utilise Gary to the fullest.

When I heard we had to do a video concept, I was like,

"We gotta use Gary in it."

What if he's eating a ice cream and he does it - Gary's eating

the ice cream and he starts to do the Busey dance.

Because he likes the ice cream so much.

And then it turns into a craze.

I can make up the Busey dance.

It will scare you and make you laugh.

"Whoa, God, what is that?!"

It's definitely realistic for him to be doing something crazy,

and that's a viral video.

You should start working on some moves.

Let me go out here.

I like that.

We want Gary to do some kind of goofy dance.

And then all of a sudden it becomes a viral thing that catches on,

like Gangnam, that kind of thing.

I want to put him in Speedo, myself.

Or a thong!

Oh, don't worry, it's going to come.

Oh, my goodness.

What do you say, you want to dance with me?

Not yet. I don't think you've hit on it yet.

It's day two of the final task.

-So this is our room.

-Hello, everybody.

-Very nice.

And the task is to design, create an ice cream,

do all the packaging for the ice cream,

do a video about the ice cream, and then invite a bunch of people to

the event to pay ridiculous amounts of money to be around the ice cream.

-American Atheists coming through.

-Good.

And we made really good ice cream.

-Where's...?

-Here we go.

-I like it.

After I had the name, Vanilla Chocolate Magic Swirtle,

I was worried people would say, "What is a magic swirtle?"

So I decided to hang a lantern on that,

which is what you always do in magic and comedy.

"What is a swirtle? It's a good, delish, sweet and salty,

"creamy and crunch, rich Madagascar vanilla ice cream

"with a sea salt chocolate swirl and chunks of chocolate caramel candy."

So I put in, "What is a magic swirtle?" as our kind of slogan.

When you have something you really don't want and you're

insecure about, you make sure you put it right out in the front

so no-one else can bust you on it.

I like it.

'It's as easy as that.'

And people will be sucking it down like it were black tar heroin.

Wow.

Ah. There's Teller.

-You're in the right place.

-Oh, great.

-And show folk.

The showgirls!

-How you been?

-Great.

-Hi, I'm La Toya.

'The idea of this commercial,

'which is the magic and the Las Vegas theme'

with Penn and Teller, his partner, and of course the Vegas showgirls.

It's all come together as one, as a swirtle.

What we need to do is get some idea of what your outfits look like.

Wonderful. Let's take a look.

Oh, look at you girls! You look beautiful!

I love it! Oh, my gosh!

Vegas versus Nashville at just about anything, Vegas wins.

I hope that Mr trump says, "OK, they're not kidding around!"

HE LAUGHS

Cos look at that.

I'm excited because I've never seen a showgirl close and personal

and if I was gay, I would have jumped through the roof.

Really.

Penn? It's fantastic.

And on the monitor it's un-BLEEP-believable.

The visual of having four showgirls with Penn and Teller sold it. 100%.

This is like a morning TV show.

LAUGHTER

This is it, yep.

Oh, it is. Oh, so, yeah.

We have a lot to do. I mean, we have very little time to do it in and if

I was managing I would be getting

nervous right about now, but...

You know, a cowboy's in charge.

So, first set up - couch, grandfather, granddaughter.

She explains the mashup to him.

And he goes, "Oh!

"You mean like combining a new dance and an old dance?"

And then he goes, "Oh, so mashup is like combining those two things?"

And then he does it and she goes, "Wait, wait! Stop!"

She grabs her phone, says, "Do it again!"

He does it again. That's where it goes viral.

That's when her friends start picking it up.

-You feeling me?

-Mm-hm.

Huh? How about that what I just said?

-That was

-BLEEP,

-right, huh? Are you feeling me?

We had a concept but we didn't have the dance,

which was going to be the important part of the commercial,

because the dance is what's supposed to be

so fabulous that it goes viral.

You should probably go stretch.

-Yeah.

-Go stretch.

GARY GROANS

Trace tells Gary at one point,

"Gary, go ahead on over there

"and stretch so you can be ready."

And Gary is on this crazy stretching regimen

and doing all these stretches and talking to himself.

Whoosh!

Sometimes something's so off-the-wall,

we think of as out of the box.

Gary just thinks of it as normal.