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CHEERING AND APPLAUSE | 0:00:21 | 0:00:23 | |
Hello and welcome to Top Gear. | 0:00:23 | 0:00:26 | |
-We're back! -CHEERING | 0:00:26 | 0:00:28 | |
-And we've got lots and lots of shiny new cars. -That's right. | 0:00:28 | 0:00:32 | |
CHEERING | 0:00:32 | 0:00:33 | |
That's right. | 0:00:33 | 0:00:35 | |
In fact, here's a look at what's coming up over the next seven weeks. | 0:00:35 | 0:00:38 | |
# My mother told me "Son, let it be"... # | 0:00:40 | 0:00:43 | |
Oh, it's on! | 0:00:43 | 0:00:44 | |
# Sold my soul to the calling... # | 0:00:44 | 0:00:48 | |
Let's go racing! | 0:00:48 | 0:00:49 | |
# Sold my soul to a sweet melody... # | 0:00:49 | 0:00:52 | |
HE LAUGHS | 0:00:52 | 0:00:55 | |
# Now I'm gone, now I'm gone now I'm gone | 0:00:55 | 0:00:59 | |
# Oh, gimme that fire... # | 0:00:59 | 0:01:01 | |
ENGINE ROARS | 0:01:01 | 0:01:03 | |
TYRES SQUEAL | 0:01:03 | 0:01:04 | |
-THEY LAUGH -It's got a chicken! | 0:01:04 | 0:01:05 | |
I'm done. Have the car, I'm out. | 0:01:05 | 0:01:08 | |
HE LAUGHS | 0:01:08 | 0:01:10 | |
Oh, the acceleration is enormous! | 0:01:10 | 0:01:13 | |
Whoo! | 0:01:13 | 0:01:14 | |
The way this is written, | 0:01:15 | 0:01:17 | |
it sounds like I just kicked your ass here. | 0:01:17 | 0:01:19 | |
HE LAUGHS | 0:01:19 | 0:01:20 | |
# Oh, gimme that fire... # | 0:01:20 | 0:01:22 | |
My knob's come off! | 0:01:22 | 0:01:24 | |
# Oh, gimme that fire... # | 0:01:24 | 0:01:27 | |
Oh, yes! What a thing! | 0:01:27 | 0:01:29 | |
# Oh, gimme that fire... # | 0:01:29 | 0:01:32 | |
THAT is immature. | 0:01:32 | 0:01:33 | |
Ooh. OK. | 0:01:35 | 0:01:37 | |
All righty. | 0:01:37 | 0:01:38 | |
Wow, that's a lot for the eyes. | 0:01:38 | 0:01:40 | |
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE | 0:01:40 | 0:01:44 | |
Looks OK to me. | 0:01:44 | 0:01:46 | |
OK...let's kick it off with this. | 0:01:46 | 0:01:49 | |
The LaFerrari. | 0:01:49 | 0:01:50 | |
Costs £1 million, and only 500 will ever be built. | 0:01:50 | 0:01:54 | |
Interesting, isn't it, that adding "La" to a name | 0:01:54 | 0:01:57 | |
makes it sound more exotic, | 0:01:57 | 0:01:59 | |
whereas "Le" - not so much, really. | 0:01:59 | 0:02:02 | |
LAUGHTER | 0:02:02 | 0:02:04 | |
I get it. I see what you did there. You got... You got me. | 0:02:04 | 0:02:07 | |
We don't need to go into your last name. All right. | 0:02:07 | 0:02:09 | |
Anyhow, the LaFerrari. | 0:02:09 | 0:02:12 | |
You hear that, you think, "Ferrari's VIP area," right? | 0:02:12 | 0:02:16 | |
The fastest, the most advanced, the most exclusive. | 0:02:16 | 0:02:20 | |
Well, nearly. Because, in the world of Ferrari, | 0:02:20 | 0:02:23 | |
turns out there's a V-VIP area - | 0:02:23 | 0:02:26 | |
-somewhere off-limits to us mere commoners. -Mm-hm. | 0:02:26 | 0:02:29 | |
Somewhere home to a truly extraordinary machine. | 0:02:29 | 0:02:32 | |
Here it is, the Ferrari FXXK. | 0:02:42 | 0:02:46 | |
And, no, that name is NOT accidental. | 0:02:46 | 0:02:49 | |
-Oh, my -BLEEP -days. | 0:02:50 | 0:02:53 | |
It's based on the bones of the LaFerrari hypercar, | 0:02:53 | 0:02:56 | |
but it's been intensified in every department. | 0:02:56 | 0:02:58 | |
Only 40 will ever exist, | 0:03:01 | 0:03:03 | |
and it costs over £2 million. | 0:03:03 | 0:03:06 | |
Or at least it would, if you could buy it. | 0:03:07 | 0:03:09 | |
Which you can't. Even if you're a zillionaire, | 0:03:09 | 0:03:12 | |
you don't just phone up Ferrari with your credit card details. | 0:03:12 | 0:03:15 | |
Oh, no. | 0:03:15 | 0:03:17 | |
First, you must have been judged, in Ferrari's words, | 0:03:17 | 0:03:20 | |
to "have the right mind-set." | 0:03:20 | 0:03:22 | |
You must be invited. | 0:03:22 | 0:03:24 | |
In fact, the FXXK is so unattainable, | 0:03:25 | 0:03:28 | |
I'm the first outsider ever permitted to drive one. | 0:03:28 | 0:03:32 | |
ENGINE PURRS | 0:03:35 | 0:03:38 | |
So, just for today, | 0:03:38 | 0:03:41 | |
you can keep your LaFerraris, | 0:03:41 | 0:03:43 | |
your everyday hypercars. | 0:03:43 | 0:03:46 | |
ENGINE GROWLS | 0:03:46 | 0:03:48 | |
MUSIC: Run by Bring Me The Horizon | 0:03:48 | 0:03:51 | |
Today, I've got more power, | 0:03:51 | 0:03:54 | |
more lightness, | 0:03:54 | 0:03:56 | |
more grip. | 0:03:56 | 0:03:58 | |
So much MORE. | 0:03:58 | 0:03:59 | |
ENGINE ROARS | 0:04:04 | 0:04:08 | |
Oh! Oh! | 0:04:10 | 0:04:12 | |
The speed is preposterous! | 0:04:15 | 0:04:18 | |
If you believe it, | 0:04:19 | 0:04:20 | |
it has 1,050 horsepower. | 0:04:20 | 0:04:24 | |
That's 87 more than the LaFerrari road car. | 0:04:28 | 0:04:31 | |
It's SO physical. | 0:04:33 | 0:04:35 | |
It gets inside your body. | 0:04:35 | 0:04:38 | |
Sensational, addictive, mighty, corrupting power! | 0:04:40 | 0:04:46 | |
0 to 60 takes just over two seconds, | 0:04:49 | 0:04:52 | |
but this car lives way beyond that. | 0:04:52 | 0:04:55 | |
Just keeps going... | 0:04:55 | 0:04:57 | |
until your brain implodes... | 0:04:57 | 0:04:58 | |
..like a collapsing star! | 0:05:00 | 0:05:01 | |
Like the LaFerrari, the FXXK has a KERS system | 0:05:05 | 0:05:08 | |
harvesting energy wasted underbraking. | 0:05:08 | 0:05:11 | |
If I brake hard now, | 0:05:11 | 0:05:12 | |
I can feel a kind of pressure behind my eyeballs, forcing them forward. | 0:05:12 | 0:05:17 | |
But here the system is F1 spec, | 0:05:17 | 0:05:20 | |
and when it uses that energy to boost the performance | 0:05:20 | 0:05:22 | |
of the 6.3-litre V12 engine... | 0:05:22 | 0:05:25 | |
..it just bungs you down the road. | 0:05:26 | 0:05:28 | |
It's not like a normal car experience of acceleration. | 0:05:28 | 0:05:32 | |
Here we go. I accelerate in third and... | 0:05:32 | 0:05:35 | |
ENGINE ROARS | 0:05:35 | 0:05:36 | |
..I'm 100 yards further than I thought. | 0:05:36 | 0:05:39 | |
Good Lord. | 0:05:39 | 0:05:40 | |
And then there's the traction control. | 0:05:41 | 0:05:44 | |
Because Ferrari doesn't want to kill its wealthiest customers, | 0:05:44 | 0:05:47 | |
they're some of the most sophisticated systems | 0:05:47 | 0:05:49 | |
I've ever encountered. | 0:05:49 | 0:05:51 | |
I can just bury the throttle coming out of turns, | 0:05:51 | 0:05:54 | |
and it just manages it beautifully. | 0:05:54 | 0:05:57 | |
I suppose part of the thrill of this car is... | 0:05:57 | 0:06:00 | |
building up the courage to switch them off. | 0:06:00 | 0:06:03 | |
Well, you only live once. | 0:06:03 | 0:06:05 | |
ENGINE ROARS, TYRES SQUEAL | 0:06:08 | 0:06:11 | |
Oh, yes! I'm alive! I'm alive! | 0:06:18 | 0:06:22 | |
HE LAUGHS | 0:06:24 | 0:06:26 | |
Now, this is a good way to ruin some very expensive tyres. | 0:06:29 | 0:06:32 | |
Fortunately, changing them is easy, | 0:06:33 | 0:06:35 | |
because your £2 million FXXK | 0:06:35 | 0:06:38 | |
also comes with its very own Ferrari pit crew... | 0:06:38 | 0:06:41 | |
..just like a modern Formula One car. | 0:06:42 | 0:06:45 | |
But, unlike a modern Formula One car, | 0:06:45 | 0:06:48 | |
it doesn't need to comply with a great big rule book. | 0:06:48 | 0:06:50 | |
In fact, it doesn't need to comply with the rule book...well, at all. | 0:06:50 | 0:06:54 | |
Ferrari basically said to its engineers, | 0:06:56 | 0:06:58 | |
"Knock yourselves out, do whatever the hell you want. | 0:06:58 | 0:07:00 | |
"Just make it fast. | 0:07:00 | 0:07:02 | |
"CRAZY fast!" | 0:07:02 | 0:07:03 | |
And this being Ferrari... | 0:07:07 | 0:07:09 | |
..crazy fast on the straights is just the start. | 0:07:10 | 0:07:14 | |
The true nature of this car lies in the way it corners. | 0:07:15 | 0:07:20 | |
ENGINE ROARS | 0:07:20 | 0:07:22 | |
The faster you go, the harder it sticks. It's like a giant magnet. | 0:07:22 | 0:07:27 | |
You can't see it but, boy, can you feel it. | 0:07:27 | 0:07:30 | |
It's lawless, savage. | 0:07:32 | 0:07:35 | |
It's motorsport unlimited. | 0:07:36 | 0:07:39 | |
Unbound by rules, | 0:07:42 | 0:07:43 | |
the FXXK can delve deep into the dark art of aero. | 0:07:43 | 0:07:47 | |
From that enormous active wing to the insane diffuser, | 0:07:47 | 0:07:51 | |
its hunger for downforce crushes the tyres into the tarmac. | 0:07:51 | 0:07:55 | |
The aero through this left-hander. | 0:07:58 | 0:08:00 | |
Wow! Into the deck. | 0:08:00 | 0:08:03 | |
Right now, it feels about the fasted thing ever made, to me. | 0:08:04 | 0:08:08 | |
'The performance of the FXXK is so extraordinary, | 0:08:13 | 0:08:17 | |
'it recalibrates your understanding of... | 0:08:17 | 0:08:19 | |
'what a car is capable of. | 0:08:19 | 0:08:21 | |
'It's wonderful, intoxicating. | 0:08:21 | 0:08:25 | |
'It's so cutting-edge, it's...' | 0:08:25 | 0:08:26 | |
I got quite a high water temperature now, so I need to just cool it down. | 0:08:26 | 0:08:30 | |
'..well, it's high maintenance. | 0:08:30 | 0:08:32 | |
'And that means your pit crew will spend a lot of time | 0:08:33 | 0:08:36 | |
'fiddling about with stuff you don't understand.' | 0:08:36 | 0:08:39 | |
Needs a reset on the, er... | 0:08:39 | 0:08:41 | |
Er... | 0:08:41 | 0:08:43 | |
And this ultimate Ferrari thoroughbred is so extreme, | 0:08:43 | 0:08:46 | |
you can't drive it on the road, | 0:08:46 | 0:08:48 | |
and it doesn't qualify for any existing race series. | 0:08:48 | 0:08:51 | |
ENGINES ECHO | 0:08:51 | 0:08:55 | |
So, as a car, the FXXK doesn't really make sense. | 0:08:59 | 0:09:03 | |
But it's not meant to. | 0:09:03 | 0:09:05 | |
It's not really a car. | 0:09:05 | 0:09:06 | |
What it is is a ticket... | 0:09:08 | 0:09:11 | |
to the most exclusive private members club on the planet. | 0:09:11 | 0:09:14 | |
And this club has one final members-only benefit. | 0:09:17 | 0:09:21 | |
You see, up to now, the car has been holding back, | 0:09:23 | 0:09:27 | |
saving power to make sure its batteries never run flat. | 0:09:27 | 0:09:30 | |
But the FXXK has something called Qualify Mode, | 0:09:32 | 0:09:36 | |
and that gives you all the petrol power | 0:09:36 | 0:09:38 | |
and all the electric power in one massive hit. | 0:09:38 | 0:09:41 | |
Maximum attack for one lap only. And, well... | 0:09:42 | 0:09:46 | |
since I've only got one lap left, well... | 0:09:46 | 0:09:49 | |
you can't take it with you. | 0:09:49 | 0:09:50 | |
1,050 horsepower! | 0:10:23 | 0:10:26 | |
What a car! What a day! | 0:10:26 | 0:10:30 | |
Drink it up. Drink it up, it's the last lap. | 0:10:43 | 0:10:46 | |
Unbelievable. I'll never get to do that again. | 0:10:54 | 0:10:59 | |
I'm staggered I've had a chance to do it in the first place. | 0:10:59 | 0:11:02 | |
When the world's electric... | 0:11:06 | 0:11:08 | |
..I think I'll remember this day more than every other. | 0:11:09 | 0:11:14 | |
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE | 0:11:20 | 0:11:22 | |
-Ooh. -Well, I didn't crash. -No, you didn't. No, what an incredible car. | 0:11:24 | 0:11:29 | |
And I've got to be honest, you drove the ass off it. | 0:11:29 | 0:11:31 | |
One tiny point though, and I don't mean to be picky, | 0:11:31 | 0:11:34 | |
-but you know this whole exclusive club thing? -Mm-hm. | 0:11:34 | 0:11:36 | |
OK, so what you're saying is, | 0:11:36 | 0:11:38 | |
if you're a very, very special friend of Ferrari, | 0:11:38 | 0:11:41 | |
you might just be lucky enough to receive an invitation | 0:11:41 | 0:11:46 | |
-to give them £2 million. -Correct. | 0:11:46 | 0:11:49 | |
And in return, you get a car that, yeah, | 0:11:49 | 0:11:51 | |
is very fast and very pretty, but it's essentially useless, right? | 0:11:51 | 0:11:55 | |
I mean, you can't drive it on the road, | 0:11:55 | 0:11:57 | |
you can't enter it in any race series, | 0:11:57 | 0:11:59 | |
you need a team of mechanics to keep it running... | 0:11:59 | 0:12:01 | |
Also correct. | 0:12:01 | 0:12:04 | |
That's good business. | 0:12:04 | 0:12:06 | |
LAUGHTER | 0:12:06 | 0:12:07 | |
It is if you're Ferrari. | 0:12:07 | 0:12:09 | |
Now, this is the point we usually hand the car over to Stig | 0:12:09 | 0:12:12 | |
to thrash around our test track, but today, we can't. | 0:12:12 | 0:12:15 | |
It's just too cold out there. | 0:12:15 | 0:12:16 | |
The FXXK is on racing slicks and it just won't get hot enough to work. | 0:12:16 | 0:12:20 | |
We're sorry. | 0:12:20 | 0:12:21 | |
But we'll try to coax it back again for a lap later in the series | 0:12:21 | 0:12:24 | |
-when the weather warms up a bit. -Yes, we will. Rory. | 0:12:24 | 0:12:27 | |
What a car. | 0:12:27 | 0:12:29 | |
And the high horsepower thrills don't end there, | 0:12:29 | 0:12:31 | |
because later this series, and I can't believe I got to do this, | 0:12:31 | 0:12:34 | |
but I drive the new Renault Twingo. | 0:12:34 | 0:12:38 | |
-Oh, yes. -Wahey! -Oh, yes. -Ho, ho! APPLAUSE | 0:12:38 | 0:12:40 | |
-Whoo! -Yeah. | 0:12:40 | 0:12:42 | |
OK. Now it is time to introduce this week's studio guest. | 0:12:43 | 0:12:48 | |
He's the star of Atonement, X-Men and Split. | 0:12:48 | 0:12:51 | |
Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome James McAvoy. | 0:12:51 | 0:12:54 | |
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE | 0:12:54 | 0:12:56 | |
WHISTLING | 0:12:59 | 0:13:01 | |
Welcome, welcome. | 0:13:03 | 0:13:05 | |
Now, James, I know you didn't get a chauffeur to drop you down today. | 0:13:09 | 0:13:13 | |
-You drove yourself, right? -I did, yes. -OK, what did you drive? | 0:13:13 | 0:13:15 | |
-I drove my RS3. -Nice, little pocket rocket. -Little ninja, yeah. | 0:13:15 | 0:13:19 | |
-300 plus horsepower there. -Uh, if you say so. | 0:13:19 | 0:13:22 | |
Yeah, I just know it goes fast, man. It goes fast. | 0:13:22 | 0:13:25 | |
So you have a driver's licence now, | 0:13:25 | 0:13:26 | |
but didn't you drive for years without one? | 0:13:26 | 0:13:29 | |
This is the weird thing. I played a car thief in Shameless | 0:13:29 | 0:13:32 | |
and I had to drive many beautiful cars | 0:13:32 | 0:13:34 | |
and nobody ever asked me if I had a driver's licence, | 0:13:34 | 0:13:36 | |
so I didn't, I didn't offer it up. | 0:13:36 | 0:13:38 | |
-I didn't get a driver's licence until six years later. -Hang on. | 0:13:38 | 0:13:41 | |
You're painting quite a picture for us. | 0:13:41 | 0:13:43 | |
Any other bad behaviour you want to come clean with? | 0:13:43 | 0:13:45 | |
I do actually have a clean driver's licence, but I did have a... | 0:13:45 | 0:13:48 | |
I had a provisional driver's licence just for riding a 125 scooter | 0:13:48 | 0:13:52 | |
before I grew up and got a big bike, and, erm... | 0:13:52 | 0:13:56 | |
I got 11 points on my provisional licence. | 0:13:56 | 0:13:59 | |
-LAUGHTER -Yeah. | 0:13:59 | 0:14:00 | |
The guy, the policeman that took me aside | 0:14:00 | 0:14:03 | |
was like, "I'm probably going to let you off with it", | 0:14:03 | 0:14:06 | |
and his partner was like shouting from the car going, "No way! | 0:14:06 | 0:14:09 | |
"He's going down! This is unbelievable!" | 0:14:09 | 0:14:11 | |
So, yeah, they put me in the back of the car | 0:14:11 | 0:14:13 | |
and made me feel like a drug dealer. | 0:14:13 | 0:14:15 | |
All right, now, you didn't just come down here to enjoy our company, | 0:14:15 | 0:14:19 | |
because, frankly, who would do that? No, no. | 0:14:19 | 0:14:21 | |
-You came here to drive fast around our track. -Yes. | 0:14:21 | 0:14:24 | |
And the first thing that everyone here should know is that | 0:14:24 | 0:14:27 | |
the original Top Gear track is back! | 0:14:27 | 0:14:30 | |
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE | 0:14:30 | 0:14:32 | |
And here's the other thing you need to know, we've got a new car. | 0:14:35 | 0:14:39 | |
And after all those Lianas and Lacettis and Cee'ds... | 0:14:39 | 0:14:42 | |
-I'm still a big fan of the Cee'd. -That's cos you were quick in it. | 0:14:42 | 0:14:44 | |
We decided it was high time for something a bit more exciting, | 0:14:44 | 0:14:47 | |
something rear-wheel drive, something fast. | 0:14:47 | 0:14:50 | |
That's right, but not too fast, | 0:14:50 | 0:14:52 | |
cos we're talking about celebrities here, | 0:14:52 | 0:14:54 | |
not responsible adults. | 0:14:54 | 0:14:55 | |
Which meant there was only one car for the job, | 0:14:55 | 0:14:57 | |
and I mean literally only one car. | 0:14:57 | 0:15:00 | |
Introducing our new reasonably fast car, | 0:15:00 | 0:15:04 | |
it's the Toyota GT86. | 0:15:04 | 0:15:06 | |
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE | 0:15:06 | 0:15:08 | |
Drive it well and it's so much fun, but get it wrong and you will spin. | 0:15:12 | 0:15:16 | |
-I guarantee it. -Yeah, so do I. From experience I can guarantee it. | 0:15:16 | 0:15:21 | |
Right, so, obviously we're not going to send you out there | 0:15:21 | 0:15:24 | |
without a little bit of instruction, so... | 0:15:24 | 0:15:26 | |
Do you remember at school that one teacher | 0:15:26 | 0:15:29 | |
who really inspired you, nurtured you, believed in you? | 0:15:29 | 0:15:33 | |
Well, our instructor is exactly the opposite of that. | 0:15:33 | 0:15:38 | |
He's mad, he's tiny, his head is very shiny, it's Chris Harris. | 0:15:38 | 0:15:41 | |
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE | 0:15:41 | 0:15:43 | |
Welcome to the Toyota GT86. | 0:15:45 | 0:15:47 | |
Your performance reflects on me. | 0:15:47 | 0:15:49 | |
-All right, mate. -So you've got to listen. -What? -OK? | 0:15:49 | 0:15:52 | |
Aim for the 50 metre board. | 0:15:54 | 0:15:56 | |
Don't try and be funny. Fourth gear. | 0:15:56 | 0:15:58 | |
When I say "brake", brake. Brake! | 0:15:58 | 0:16:01 | |
CAR SCREECHES | 0:16:01 | 0:16:02 | |
-Listen! Listen, James. -I am. | 0:16:05 | 0:16:07 | |
Over that way. Do what you're told. | 0:16:07 | 0:16:09 | |
My hand's over there. Look, third gear. Third gear. | 0:16:09 | 0:16:12 | |
-Third gear, that's second, you... -BLEEP | 0:16:12 | 0:16:13 | |
-Third! Third! -CAR SCREECHES | 0:16:13 | 0:16:16 | |
Argh! | 0:16:18 | 0:16:20 | |
Aw! | 0:16:20 | 0:16:21 | |
-OK. -Whoo! | 0:16:21 | 0:16:22 | |
You have to listen to the next bit, | 0:16:25 | 0:16:27 | |
otherwise we both end up being looked for through dental records. | 0:16:27 | 0:16:30 | |
Fourth gear. Fourth gear. | 0:16:30 | 0:16:31 | |
CAR SCREECHES | 0:16:31 | 0:16:35 | |
JAMES LAUGHS | 0:16:37 | 0:16:39 | |
Yes! | 0:16:40 | 0:16:41 | |
I wish they'd given me someone talented for this first episode, | 0:16:41 | 0:16:44 | |
cos it would look so good for my coaching skills. | 0:16:44 | 0:16:47 | |
Oh, my lord. | 0:16:49 | 0:16:51 | |
And over the line. | 0:16:51 | 0:16:53 | |
And stop. | 0:16:53 | 0:16:54 | |
And never... | 0:16:56 | 0:16:57 | |
-BLEEP -..do that to me again. | 0:16:57 | 0:16:59 | |
-You loved it. -Jesus Christ. -You loved it. | 0:16:59 | 0:17:01 | |
APPLAUSE | 0:17:01 | 0:17:03 | |
MATT LAUGHS | 0:17:06 | 0:17:07 | |
Well, very nice, very nice. | 0:17:09 | 0:17:11 | |
I'm beginning to see why that career as a hostage negotiator | 0:17:11 | 0:17:15 | |
never worked out for you. | 0:17:15 | 0:17:16 | |
OK, seriously, Harris, that is no way to speak to our guest. | 0:17:16 | 0:17:20 | |
Absolutely not. | 0:17:20 | 0:17:21 | |
Do you know what? I kind of liked it. | 0:17:21 | 0:17:23 | |
I like to be treated rough sometimes. | 0:17:23 | 0:17:24 | |
-That's just... -LAUGHTER | 0:17:24 | 0:17:26 | |
Well, anyway, we are looking forward to seeing your timed lap | 0:17:26 | 0:17:29 | |
a little bit later. But first, here's a question... | 0:17:29 | 0:17:32 | |
£150,000, something fun for the summer, what do you buy? | 0:17:32 | 0:17:36 | |
-Er, GT3 RS. -OK, Rory? | 0:17:36 | 0:17:39 | |
-McLaren 570? -Mm-hm. | 0:17:39 | 0:17:41 | |
Yellow Ford Capri with black stripes on it. | 0:17:41 | 0:17:44 | |
LAUGHTER OK. | 0:17:44 | 0:17:46 | |
-OK, all good. -Thanks. -All good. All wrong. | 0:17:46 | 0:17:49 | |
Because the most fun you can have for £150,000 is one of these. | 0:17:49 | 0:17:55 | |
GENTLE LAUGHTER | 0:17:55 | 0:17:57 | |
-That's a Hobbit caravan. -No. No, that's a pressure washer. | 0:17:57 | 0:18:01 | |
So it's a pressure washer for £150,000 Sterling. | 0:18:01 | 0:18:05 | |
What are you going to wash with that? | 0:18:05 | 0:18:07 | |
I'm going to wash a melon, a shed and a Volvo. Check this out. | 0:18:07 | 0:18:12 | |
This is the Karcher Ecomaster mark three. | 0:18:12 | 0:18:15 | |
It runs at about 2,800 bar of pressure. | 0:18:15 | 0:18:18 | |
That's...about 40,611 PSI. | 0:18:18 | 0:18:22 | |
Roughly. Exactly. | 0:18:22 | 0:18:24 | |
This cleans stuff really well. | 0:18:24 | 0:18:27 | |
Watch this. | 0:18:27 | 0:18:29 | |
There you have it! | 0:19:04 | 0:19:06 | |
Clean! | 0:19:06 | 0:19:08 | |
Clean as a whistle! | 0:19:08 | 0:19:09 | |
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE | 0:19:11 | 0:19:14 | |
Am I right? That's good. That thing's great. | 0:19:14 | 0:19:18 | |
-Your handwriting is appalling. -LAUGHTER | 0:19:20 | 0:19:22 | |
Don't pretend you're not jealous. | 0:19:22 | 0:19:24 | |
Right, I need to vent about something. | 0:19:24 | 0:19:26 | |
The other night I was watching Ronin, OK? | 0:19:26 | 0:19:28 | |
-Ronin, that film that came out, what? 20 years ago? -Yeah. | 0:19:28 | 0:19:31 | |
-Always up-to-date. -Stop that. Look, | 0:19:31 | 0:19:32 | |
one of the best on-screen car chases of all time. Agreed? | 0:19:32 | 0:19:35 | |
-FROM AUDIENCE: -Yes. -OK. | 0:19:35 | 0:19:37 | |
But I've spotted something that's troubling me, vexing me. | 0:19:37 | 0:19:39 | |
Have a look at this. | 0:19:39 | 0:19:40 | |
-GUNSHOT -Wait there! There! | 0:19:46 | 0:19:47 | |
-How annoying is that? Did you see that? -What? -See what? | 0:19:47 | 0:19:50 | |
-You saw that. -What?! -There. | 0:19:50 | 0:19:52 | |
BMW E34 M5 1990, turbine design wheel, | 0:19:52 | 0:19:56 | |
cool for brake distance, that kind of thing. | 0:19:56 | 0:19:59 | |
Cut to... That's not an M5 wheel. | 0:19:59 | 0:20:02 | |
-LAUGHTER -That's the... | 0:20:02 | 0:20:04 | |
That's from a 535i. It's a continuity nightmare. | 0:20:04 | 0:20:08 | |
How long are you planning on being a virgin? | 0:20:08 | 0:20:11 | |
LAUGHTER | 0:20:11 | 0:20:13 | |
APPLAUSE | 0:20:13 | 0:20:16 | |
I could help you out. | 0:20:19 | 0:20:20 | |
Look, you work in film, you saw that, that's a nightmare. | 0:20:20 | 0:20:23 | |
-Yeah, right? -This has been bothering me... Can I do one more? -Go ahead. | 0:20:23 | 0:20:27 | |
..bothering me since 1987. Withnail And I. Great film? | 0:20:27 | 0:20:30 | |
-A wonderful film. -You must know it line by line. -Yeah... Go on, then. | 0:20:30 | 0:20:34 | |
Continuity nightmare. | 0:20:34 | 0:20:36 | |
Watch this. | 0:20:36 | 0:20:37 | |
Withnail, car. | 0:20:39 | 0:20:41 | |
There! | 0:20:41 | 0:20:42 | |
-Where? What? -You saw it. | 0:20:42 | 0:20:44 | |
-Saw what? -You saw it! | 0:20:44 | 0:20:46 | |
Withnail is set in 1969, OK? | 0:20:46 | 0:20:50 | |
It's the end of the '60s, it's apocalyptic. | 0:20:50 | 0:20:52 | |
Right in the background is a Volvo 340 DL, launched in... | 0:20:52 | 0:20:56 | |
1976! Even worse, the red smudge behind it, | 0:20:56 | 0:21:00 | |
Nissan Sunny, 1981. | 0:21:00 | 0:21:02 | |
-LAUGHTER -It's terrible. | 0:21:02 | 0:21:04 | |
Imagine, OK, Gladiator, Russell Crowe struts in, | 0:21:04 | 0:21:07 | |
"I'm the father of someone... got murdered, | 0:21:07 | 0:21:09 | |
"I'm generally fed up with life," toga, look down below. | 0:21:09 | 0:21:11 | |
-Air Jordans. -LAUGHTER | 0:21:11 | 0:21:14 | |
You're not going to suffer that. It's not good. | 0:21:14 | 0:21:17 | |
It is literally, | 0:21:17 | 0:21:18 | |
literally...nothing like that. OK? | 0:21:18 | 0:21:21 | |
In fairness, though, I do hate film mistakes. | 0:21:21 | 0:21:24 | |
-You know Mad Max Fury Road? -Yeah. | 0:21:24 | 0:21:27 | |
OK, if you look really close, really, really closely, | 0:21:27 | 0:21:31 | |
don't blink, you'll miss it, | 0:21:31 | 0:21:33 | |
you'll see that they cast Tom Hardy instead of me. | 0:21:33 | 0:21:36 | |
LAUGHTER | 0:21:36 | 0:21:37 | |
Look real close. You can see it. | 0:21:37 | 0:21:40 | |
Anyway, moving on, a couple of months back the producers | 0:21:40 | 0:21:43 | |
told us to tackle a serious consumer question. | 0:21:43 | 0:21:45 | |
Specifically this one... | 0:21:45 | 0:21:47 | |
What is the most reliable new car on sale today? | 0:21:47 | 0:21:51 | |
And we said, "Well, that's a stupid question. | 0:21:51 | 0:21:53 | |
"New cars can't be reliable. They're new. | 0:21:53 | 0:21:56 | |
"You have to earn reliability over lots and lots of miles." | 0:21:56 | 0:21:59 | |
If a car's driven to, say, the moon and back, and it's still going, | 0:21:59 | 0:22:03 | |
now that's proof of reliability. | 0:22:03 | 0:22:05 | |
That's right, so our producer said, "All right, you're on." | 0:22:05 | 0:22:08 | |
They told us each to go buy a car | 0:22:08 | 0:22:10 | |
that HAD driven to the moon and back. | 0:22:10 | 0:22:12 | |
Well, the Earth equivalent. | 0:22:12 | 0:22:14 | |
480,000 miles on the clock. So we did. | 0:22:14 | 0:22:18 | |
And they shipped them off for a series of reliability challenges | 0:22:18 | 0:22:21 | |
in the middle of nowhere. | 0:22:21 | 0:22:23 | |
A little place called Kazakhstan. | 0:22:23 | 0:22:25 | |
So... | 0:22:38 | 0:22:39 | |
Kazakhstan. | 0:22:39 | 0:22:41 | |
Shall we go and find our cars? | 0:22:41 | 0:22:43 | |
-Three containers, gentlemen. -Who wants to go first? | 0:22:47 | 0:22:50 | |
-Can I go first? -Go for it. | 0:22:50 | 0:22:51 | |
You're going to love it. | 0:22:53 | 0:22:54 | |
What do you think he's got? | 0:22:56 | 0:22:58 | |
Some kind of mental issue. | 0:22:58 | 0:23:00 | |
RORY LAUGHS | 0:23:00 | 0:23:01 | |
-It's definitely a sports car, no? -Yeah, it's got to be. | 0:23:01 | 0:23:04 | |
-A high mileage Ferrari, perhaps? -Maserati. | 0:23:04 | 0:23:08 | |
-High mileage Maserati? -Yeah. | 0:23:08 | 0:23:10 | |
Which is, you know, a horrible idea. | 0:23:10 | 0:23:13 | |
-'But Chris surprised us both.' Oh! -That's not Italian. | 0:23:13 | 0:23:17 | |
That's not Italian at all. RORY LAUGHS | 0:23:17 | 0:23:19 | |
A Volvo? | 0:23:19 | 0:23:21 | |
The Volvo V70. | 0:23:21 | 0:23:23 | |
You want reliability, you go to Sweden, gentlemen. You know that. | 0:23:23 | 0:23:27 | |
She's a minter. | 0:23:27 | 0:23:28 | |
I don't want to patronise you, but you know that in the Arctic Circle | 0:23:28 | 0:23:32 | |
a reliable car is the difference between life and death. | 0:23:32 | 0:23:36 | |
But you're not playing a housewife in this film. That's the thing. | 0:23:36 | 0:23:39 | |
Look, I know, it's not going to set any pulses racing, | 0:23:39 | 0:23:42 | |
but V70s in this generation are very, very strong. | 0:23:42 | 0:23:45 | |
Manual gearbox for a bit of fun, and there's a button in there | 0:23:45 | 0:23:48 | |
that's for heated seats, | 0:23:48 | 0:23:50 | |
and I wonder whether either of you two have that function. | 0:23:50 | 0:23:52 | |
-Shall we see your car, Matt? -THEY LAUGH | 0:23:52 | 0:23:55 | |
That's really sad, mate. | 0:23:57 | 0:23:59 | |
Forget Sweden. | 0:24:00 | 0:24:02 | |
You want reliability? | 0:24:02 | 0:24:04 | |
-CHRIS LAUGHS -He's got it! | 0:24:04 | 0:24:06 | |
THEY LAUGH | 0:24:06 | 0:24:07 | |
-Right, here we go. -He's got a Merc. | 0:24:07 | 0:24:09 | |
Now, he thinks he's just bought into the ultimate brand | 0:24:09 | 0:24:13 | |
-of reliability, but little does he know. -Come on now. | 0:24:13 | 0:24:16 | |
-Huh? -Explain yourself. | 0:24:18 | 0:24:20 | |
Mercedes, the symbol, | 0:24:20 | 0:24:22 | |
the quintessential symbol of quality, right? | 0:24:22 | 0:24:25 | |
You go anywhere in the world, | 0:24:25 | 0:24:26 | |
you see these E-Classes just rattling along, | 0:24:26 | 0:24:29 | |
clicking off the miles, reliability, reliability, reliability. | 0:24:29 | 0:24:33 | |
Do you understand the significance of the colour? | 0:24:33 | 0:24:36 | |
It's like a beige, kind of like a granny's living room colour. | 0:24:36 | 0:24:39 | |
-You know why it's that colour? -I don't know. | 0:24:39 | 0:24:41 | |
That was a taxi cab, that was a German taxi cab, | 0:24:41 | 0:24:44 | |
-probably from the Berlin area. -What? | 0:24:44 | 0:24:47 | |
So that's had the hardest life imaginable. | 0:24:47 | 0:24:50 | |
While Matt came to terms with his new taxi... | 0:24:50 | 0:24:53 | |
-But it's still an E-Class. -..I went to fetch...mine. | 0:24:53 | 0:24:57 | |
MUSIC: London Calling by the Clash | 0:24:57 | 0:25:00 | |
Oh, my God. | 0:25:00 | 0:25:03 | |
MATT LAUGHS | 0:25:03 | 0:25:05 | |
What were you thinking? | 0:25:05 | 0:25:08 | |
I don't know what to say. | 0:25:08 | 0:25:10 | |
CHRIS WHEEZES AND LAUGHS | 0:25:11 | 0:25:13 | |
Look, you want to talk reliability? | 0:25:13 | 0:25:15 | |
This has got to be in the conversation, OK? | 0:25:15 | 0:25:17 | |
London taxi, utterly bombproof. | 0:25:17 | 0:25:20 | |
Come the apocalypse, there will only be cockroaches and London cabs. | 0:25:20 | 0:25:24 | |
I don't know where to begin, Rory. | 0:25:24 | 0:25:26 | |
Look, first of all, | 0:25:26 | 0:25:27 | |
these vehicles are designed to cover very short distances. | 0:25:27 | 0:25:30 | |
Maybe 40, 50 miles at a stretch. | 0:25:30 | 0:25:32 | |
Beyond that, they are purgatory. | 0:25:32 | 0:25:34 | |
Well, that's neither here nor there. | 0:25:34 | 0:25:36 | |
Also, people visit London to come and see the London black cab. | 0:25:36 | 0:25:41 | |
No, they don't. | 0:25:41 | 0:25:42 | |
They get in that piece of crap to go see something else. | 0:25:42 | 0:25:45 | |
Tell me the best thing about this car. | 0:25:45 | 0:25:47 | |
The best thing about this car, turning circle, 7.62 metres. | 0:25:47 | 0:25:51 | |
I can run rings around your cars. | 0:25:51 | 0:25:54 | |
Right. | 0:25:54 | 0:25:55 | |
But before he could get in and show us, a man appeared in an old Lada. | 0:25:55 | 0:26:00 | |
-Welcome. -Thank you. | 0:26:00 | 0:26:02 | |
Wheel bearing's gone. | 0:26:03 | 0:26:04 | |
"You and your high-milers will now undertake | 0:26:05 | 0:26:08 | |
"a series of reliability challenges as you cross Kazakhstan | 0:26:08 | 0:26:11 | |
"to the Baikonur Cosmodrome, | 0:26:11 | 0:26:14 | |
"which is home to the Soviet Union's space programme. | 0:26:14 | 0:26:17 | |
"There's a rocket launch in two days. Be there." | 0:26:17 | 0:26:20 | |
-We're going to a rocket launch? -No, no, no. | 0:26:20 | 0:26:23 | |
Those of us that have a car that's going to make it to a rocket launch | 0:26:23 | 0:26:26 | |
are going to a rocket launch. | 0:26:26 | 0:26:27 | |
You two are going to die on the Steppe. | 0:26:27 | 0:26:30 | |
Why do you have to be like that? | 0:26:30 | 0:26:31 | |
Yes, ahead of us lay the Steppe, | 0:26:33 | 0:26:36 | |
a vast desert of unforgiving terrain and extreme temperatures, | 0:26:36 | 0:26:41 | |
certain to test our high-miler's reliability. | 0:26:41 | 0:26:44 | |
The journey would lead us to the Baikonur Cosmodrome, | 0:26:44 | 0:26:48 | |
the world's largest, oldest space launch facility. | 0:26:48 | 0:26:51 | |
And the home of the Russian space programme. | 0:26:53 | 0:26:56 | |
Sputnik, Yuri Gagarin, | 0:26:56 | 0:26:59 | |
even the first piece of the International Space Station, | 0:26:59 | 0:27:02 | |
all were launched from this 3,000 square mile | 0:27:02 | 0:27:05 | |
Russian-controlled facility... | 0:27:05 | 0:27:06 | |
..but with only two days to get there, | 0:27:09 | 0:27:11 | |
we had a lot of ground to cover. | 0:27:11 | 0:27:13 | |
I was just thinking, you see a car with 100,000 miles on it, | 0:27:17 | 0:27:20 | |
you think, right, time to get a new one, that's pretty much worn out. | 0:27:20 | 0:27:23 | |
That's not what we've done, we've gone for cars | 0:27:23 | 0:27:25 | |
that have 500,000 miles on them, and mine runs fine. | 0:27:25 | 0:27:28 | |
-How does yours run? -My cab hasn't aged a bit. | 0:27:28 | 0:27:32 | |
-What did you say? It was a piece of -BLEEP? | 0:27:32 | 0:27:34 | |
RORY LAUGHS | 0:27:34 | 0:27:36 | |
This taxi is a bit of a shed. | 0:27:38 | 0:27:41 | |
I've just discovered that my heating doesn't work - | 0:27:41 | 0:27:45 | |
and that's a bad thing, because in Kazakhstan | 0:27:45 | 0:27:48 | |
it's currently minus 12 degrees outside. | 0:27:48 | 0:27:51 | |
First impressions, very impressive. | 0:27:52 | 0:27:55 | |
Doesn't really rattle or shake, it's remarkable. | 0:27:55 | 0:27:58 | |
Let's face it, Volvos are so reliable. | 0:27:58 | 0:28:01 | |
If this thing does break down, | 0:28:01 | 0:28:03 | |
there'd probably be a national day of mourning in Sweden. | 0:28:03 | 0:28:05 | |
Guys, I don't have any heating whatsoever in my cab. | 0:28:06 | 0:28:10 | |
The sun's out, Rory. Think positive, think warm. | 0:28:10 | 0:28:15 | |
I'm going to die of pneumonia, man! | 0:28:15 | 0:28:17 | |
HE CHUCKLES | 0:28:17 | 0:28:18 | |
'Heading out of town, we made a start for Baikonur | 0:28:20 | 0:28:24 | |
'and the bustle quickly dwindled.' | 0:28:24 | 0:28:28 | |
Look at it, it's just acres and acres of nothing. | 0:28:28 | 0:28:31 | |
It's like...Stoke! | 0:28:31 | 0:28:35 | |
'And, as the road turned to dirt, | 0:28:35 | 0:28:37 | |
'we got the feeling this might not be the way to Baikonur after all.' | 0:28:37 | 0:28:41 | |
Why are we doing this? Can't we find another road? | 0:28:41 | 0:28:46 | |
'But then...' | 0:28:46 | 0:28:47 | |
Look at that. | 0:28:47 | 0:28:49 | |
-That is huge. -Thanks, Chris. | 0:28:49 | 0:28:52 | |
'We had stumbled across our first opportunity | 0:28:52 | 0:28:55 | |
'for a spot of competition.' | 0:28:55 | 0:28:57 | |
Are you thinking what I'm thinking? | 0:28:57 | 0:28:58 | |
I think I am thinking what you're thinking. | 0:28:58 | 0:29:00 | |
That looks like a race track to me. | 0:29:00 | 0:29:02 | |
I think we need to get it on. | 0:29:02 | 0:29:05 | |
'Our first test of reliability would be an impromptu quarry race | 0:29:07 | 0:29:11 | |
'down to the bottom, back to the top. | 0:29:11 | 0:29:14 | |
'First past the cow's head...wins.' | 0:29:14 | 0:29:19 | |
Gentlemen, may the best man and his machine win. | 0:29:20 | 0:29:24 | |
Come on, little black cab. | 0:29:24 | 0:29:26 | |
Three, two, one...go. | 0:29:26 | 0:29:28 | |
Oh, that's hopeless. I've just been overtaken by a bloody London taxi! | 0:29:32 | 0:29:35 | |
I've got better traction than Chris! Yeah! | 0:29:35 | 0:29:38 | |
Oh, Matt's quick, though. | 0:29:38 | 0:29:40 | |
-Oh-ho! -Ah, he's in front. | 0:29:40 | 0:29:43 | |
Come on, chase him down, chase him down. | 0:29:43 | 0:29:45 | |
Oh, he's gaining. | 0:29:47 | 0:29:48 | |
Come on, come on. | 0:29:50 | 0:29:52 | |
Yes! Yes, yes, yes! | 0:29:52 | 0:29:56 | |
Ha-ha! | 0:29:56 | 0:29:58 | |
Oh, Rory with the big move up the inside. | 0:29:59 | 0:30:02 | |
We're in front! The black cab is in front! | 0:30:05 | 0:30:08 | |
-Oh, get out of the way! -THUDDING | 0:30:09 | 0:30:11 | |
Hey, hey, watch the paint! | 0:30:11 | 0:30:13 | |
Come on, baby, come on, hold it together. | 0:30:13 | 0:30:16 | |
OK, we're coming around the loop. Ah, the turning circle coming in. | 0:30:16 | 0:30:20 | |
More than handy there. | 0:30:20 | 0:30:22 | |
79 horsepower! 0-60 in 21 seconds. | 0:30:22 | 0:30:28 | |
-THUDDING -Sorry! | 0:30:28 | 0:30:30 | |
And we've destroyed the Merc and the Volvo. | 0:30:30 | 0:30:33 | |
Oh, this is hopeless. | 0:30:33 | 0:30:35 | |
Slow up the hill. I got him, I got him. | 0:30:35 | 0:30:37 | |
Matt's gaining, Matt's gaining. | 0:30:37 | 0:30:39 | |
Here we go. | 0:30:41 | 0:30:43 | |
Ah, no! | 0:30:44 | 0:30:46 | |
-Thank you! -No! | 0:30:46 | 0:30:48 | |
-Yeah. -Oh! | 0:30:48 | 0:30:51 | |
Right, come on, old girl. | 0:30:53 | 0:30:54 | |
Here comes Chris. | 0:30:56 | 0:30:59 | |
-RATTLING -I'm on the defensive. | 0:30:59 | 0:31:01 | |
Hold him off, hold him off! Hold him off! Hold him off... | 0:31:02 | 0:31:06 | |
ENGINE GRINDS | 0:31:08 | 0:31:09 | |
Matt's slowing down. | 0:31:09 | 0:31:10 | |
What the...? | 0:31:10 | 0:31:12 | |
LOUD CRASH | 0:31:15 | 0:31:17 | |
-What the -BLEEP?! | 0:31:17 | 0:31:18 | |
ENGINES GO SILENT | 0:31:18 | 0:31:20 | |
Whoo! | 0:31:24 | 0:31:25 | |
Come on! Yes! | 0:31:25 | 0:31:28 | |
Ha-ha! | 0:31:28 | 0:31:31 | |
Not quite the end I'd expected. | 0:31:31 | 0:31:33 | |
HE LAUGHS | 0:31:35 | 0:31:36 | |
-Well, what happened? -What do you mean, what happened? | 0:31:39 | 0:31:42 | |
-You weren't moving. -I lost drive. | 0:31:42 | 0:31:44 | |
Coming up the hill, the transmission kind of let go. | 0:31:44 | 0:31:46 | |
I'll tell you what happened. | 0:31:46 | 0:31:48 | |
-I just won the race in the black cab! -Honestly, I'm disappointed. | 0:31:48 | 0:31:51 | |
I was coming past you, and you were stationary. | 0:31:51 | 0:31:54 | |
-You weren't coming past me. -I was. I was pushing you up the hill. | 0:31:54 | 0:31:56 | |
No, I was putting the moves on you, I was blocking you. | 0:31:56 | 0:31:59 | |
So you reckon you were not being pushed up the hill? | 0:31:59 | 0:32:01 | |
I was defensive driving the hell out of you. | 0:32:01 | 0:32:03 | |
-You weren't aware you were being pushed up the hill? -Yeah, | 0:32:03 | 0:32:05 | |
-but that was enough to stay ahead! -CHRIS LAUGHS | 0:32:05 | 0:32:07 | |
You would have pushed me over the finish line! | 0:32:07 | 0:32:09 | |
I'm feeling slightly guilty. | 0:32:09 | 0:32:11 | |
This car has lived for 13 years and 570,000 miles. | 0:32:11 | 0:32:15 | |
And I've had it 42 miles. | 0:32:15 | 0:32:17 | |
42 miles! | 0:32:17 | 0:32:19 | |
The last one was probably the most special. | 0:32:19 | 0:32:22 | |
-Meanwhile... -Yeah. -..pristine, good as new. | 0:32:22 | 0:32:26 | |
I can change that quite quickly for you. | 0:32:26 | 0:32:28 | |
THEY CHUCKLE | 0:32:28 | 0:32:29 | |
'Our quarry race had taken its toll - | 0:32:33 | 0:32:35 | |
'but, after a few hours, we were back on the road.' | 0:32:35 | 0:32:40 | |
Your Volvo looks like the Terminator near the end of the film. | 0:32:40 | 0:32:44 | |
I removed a quarter of the front of the car | 0:32:48 | 0:32:51 | |
and the warning system simply tells me, "Bulb failure, dipped beam". | 0:32:51 | 0:32:56 | |
That's how tough this car is. That's Nordic strength. | 0:32:56 | 0:32:58 | |
And also, the airbox has been a bit squashed | 0:32:59 | 0:33:02 | |
which means it now sounds like a full-house Audi Quattro. | 0:33:02 | 0:33:05 | |
So, actually, I've improved the car. | 0:33:05 | 0:33:08 | |
REVVING | 0:33:08 | 0:33:11 | |
It does sound good. | 0:33:11 | 0:33:13 | |
That is nice. | 0:33:13 | 0:33:15 | |
Ba-a-ah! | 0:33:15 | 0:33:17 | |
'At last, we were on the road to Baikonur | 0:33:19 | 0:33:22 | |
'and the producers had told us to make a stop at the next town, | 0:33:22 | 0:33:25 | |
'a place called Kyzylorda. | 0:33:25 | 0:33:27 | |
'So, we pressed on, | 0:33:27 | 0:33:29 | |
'and Chris took it upon himself to keep us entertained.' | 0:33:29 | 0:33:33 | |
Were you to drive from one side of Kazakhstan to the other | 0:33:33 | 0:33:36 | |
it's the same as driving from London to Istanbul. | 0:33:36 | 0:33:39 | |
It's basically the size of Western Europe. | 0:33:39 | 0:33:42 | |
Is it really? | 0:33:42 | 0:33:44 | |
On a smaller scale, this country was the origin of the apple tree, | 0:33:44 | 0:33:49 | |
so the apple was invented here. | 0:33:49 | 0:33:52 | |
Was it really? | 0:33:52 | 0:33:54 | |
The Kazakhs were also the first people to domesticate the horse, | 0:33:54 | 0:33:58 | |
the humble horse. | 0:33:58 | 0:34:00 | |
'But, before Chris could go full corduroy, | 0:34:02 | 0:34:05 | |
'we arrived in Kyzylorda and, at the local sports ground, | 0:34:05 | 0:34:09 | |
'we discovered apples and horses weren't all they had invented.' | 0:34:09 | 0:34:13 | |
CROWD NOISE | 0:34:13 | 0:34:15 | |
'They were playing a game called kokpar. Basically, that's goat polo. | 0:34:15 | 0:34:21 | |
'It's a professional sport in Kazakhstan, | 0:34:21 | 0:34:23 | |
'and the aim is to get the goat carcass in the goal.' | 0:34:23 | 0:34:26 | |
I got to say, this is, uh, right up there with some of the, um, | 0:34:30 | 0:34:36 | |
grossest shit I've ever seen. | 0:34:36 | 0:34:38 | |
THEY LAUGH | 0:34:38 | 0:34:39 | |
'As we wondered what else the afternoon had in store, | 0:34:47 | 0:34:50 | |
'a challenge arrived.' | 0:34:50 | 0:34:52 | |
It says, "You will need now take on some local high-mile heroes | 0:34:52 | 0:34:55 | |
"in a simple game of tag. | 0:34:55 | 0:34:58 | |
"If you tag another car, they're out. | 0:34:58 | 0:35:00 | |
"If you get tagged, you're out. | 0:35:00 | 0:35:04 | |
"Last car driving is the winner." | 0:35:04 | 0:35:06 | |
'Apparently, goat polo was just a warm up. | 0:35:09 | 0:35:11 | |
'And, as we took to the field, | 0:35:11 | 0:35:13 | |
'the atmosphere in the stands was electric. | 0:35:13 | 0:35:16 | |
'To prove which of our high-milers | 0:35:18 | 0:35:20 | |
'was the most rugged performance machine, | 0:35:20 | 0:35:22 | |
'we'll be going up against not just each other | 0:35:22 | 0:35:24 | |
'but three Steppe-hardened Lada workhorses. | 0:35:24 | 0:35:27 | |
'Proven benchmarks of reliability...' | 0:35:27 | 0:35:29 | |
REVVING | 0:35:29 | 0:35:31 | |
'..driven by a crack squad of local talent. | 0:35:31 | 0:35:34 | |
'So, with all six cars spaced out around the track, | 0:35:35 | 0:35:39 | |
'it was time for tag.' | 0:35:39 | 0:35:43 | |
Whoop, whoop, whoop. Let's go racing! | 0:35:44 | 0:35:47 | |
ENGINES REV | 0:35:49 | 0:35:51 | |
Here we go! | 0:35:51 | 0:35:52 | |
Come on, baby. Let's do this one to London. | 0:35:52 | 0:35:55 | |
-RORY: -Oh, that Lada is mine! | 0:35:56 | 0:35:58 | |
Hey, little red Lada, I'm coming after you. | 0:35:58 | 0:36:01 | |
They're surprisingly quick, these Ladas, these local hands. | 0:36:04 | 0:36:07 | |
I think I've got the Kazakhstani rallying champion in front of me. | 0:36:09 | 0:36:13 | |
'With the Volvo and taxi both struggling in the early stages...' | 0:36:16 | 0:36:20 | |
ENGINES REVVING | 0:36:20 | 0:36:22 | |
'..it was Matt's Mercedes making all the moves.' | 0:36:22 | 0:36:25 | |
I got this red guy, I got him, I got him! | 0:36:25 | 0:36:28 | |
CRUNCHING AND THUDDING | 0:36:28 | 0:36:30 | |
CHEERING | 0:36:30 | 0:36:31 | |
Matt's got the red Lada. | 0:36:31 | 0:36:33 | |
'But Matt had forgotten to check his mirrors.' | 0:36:33 | 0:36:35 | |
Damn! CHEERING | 0:36:37 | 0:36:39 | |
I'm out. I'm out. | 0:36:39 | 0:36:41 | |
'Having taken out the Merc, | 0:36:41 | 0:36:43 | |
'the little blue Lada had a taste for blood.' | 0:36:43 | 0:36:46 | |
I'm going to hit the brake and let him fly past me! | 0:36:46 | 0:36:48 | |
He's missed! The blue Lada has missed! | 0:36:50 | 0:36:53 | |
'But then, it wasn't the blue Lada I needed to worry about.' | 0:36:53 | 0:36:57 | |
Oh, Harris is behind me. | 0:36:57 | 0:36:59 | |
No, no, no, no! | 0:36:59 | 0:37:00 | |
-Give you a little tap, Rory. -THUD | 0:37:01 | 0:37:03 | |
Oh, Harris has got me! | 0:37:03 | 0:37:05 | |
A slight bonnet issue now, a slight bonnet issue. | 0:37:06 | 0:37:09 | |
RORY GUFFAWS | 0:37:09 | 0:37:10 | |
'With one increasingly battered Volvo left in the running, | 0:37:14 | 0:37:17 | |
'it should have been easy pickings for the two remaining Ladas, | 0:37:17 | 0:37:20 | |
'but Harris doesn't give up easily.' | 0:37:20 | 0:37:23 | |
I'm on the blue Lada now. | 0:37:23 | 0:37:25 | |
Come on, Harris, get him, get him, get him, get him, get him! | 0:37:27 | 0:37:31 | |
I'm going to tap him, I'm going to tap him. | 0:37:31 | 0:37:32 | |
CHEERING | 0:37:34 | 0:37:35 | |
A bit harsh, but there we go. He needed to know I was there! | 0:37:37 | 0:37:41 | |
Right, come on. This is the endgame. | 0:37:41 | 0:37:44 | |
He's chasing down the last Lada right now. I think he might do it. | 0:37:45 | 0:37:49 | |
I can't actually see anything. Where is he? | 0:37:52 | 0:37:54 | |
Ooh, there he is. Nudge. | 0:37:54 | 0:37:56 | |
He's got him! | 0:37:56 | 0:37:58 | |
CHEERING | 0:37:58 | 0:37:59 | |
CHRIS LAUGHS | 0:37:59 | 0:38:00 | |
Victory. | 0:38:00 | 0:38:02 | |
Finally, the Volvo gets something. | 0:38:02 | 0:38:05 | |
Way to go, Harris, all right! | 0:38:06 | 0:38:09 | |
Why is he always finishing races with his bonnet up? | 0:38:09 | 0:38:11 | |
Oh, I... It's an aero device, gives me a bit of extra front downforce. | 0:38:11 | 0:38:15 | |
RORY LAUGHS | 0:38:15 | 0:38:16 | |
A couple more screws in the bonnet this time, I think. | 0:38:16 | 0:38:18 | |
Yeah, I think so. We'll get there. We'll get the old girl to Baikonur. | 0:38:18 | 0:38:22 | |
I want to see a rocket go off. | 0:38:22 | 0:38:24 | |
To Baikonur! | 0:38:24 | 0:38:25 | |
APPLAUSE AND CHEERING | 0:38:31 | 0:38:32 | |
You know, honestly, before that trip, | 0:38:37 | 0:38:41 | |
I had no idea that Kazakhstan was real. | 0:38:41 | 0:38:44 | |
I thought it was one of those made-up places | 0:38:44 | 0:38:46 | |
like Timbuktu or Guernsey. | 0:38:46 | 0:38:48 | |
GENTLE LAUGHTER | 0:38:48 | 0:38:49 | |
Those are both real places. | 0:38:49 | 0:38:51 | |
I know. GENTLE LAUGHTER | 0:38:52 | 0:38:54 | |
OK, James, to recap what happened there | 0:38:54 | 0:38:57 | |
for everyone's benefit and yours is that | 0:38:57 | 0:38:59 | |
the taxi won the race around the quarry. All right! | 0:38:59 | 0:39:03 | |
CHEERING | 0:39:03 | 0:39:04 | |
-Yeah, yeah? -Don't do the dance, don't do the dance! | 0:39:04 | 0:39:07 | |
I won the race around the goat sacrifice temple. | 0:39:07 | 0:39:11 | |
Yeah, and Matt's Mercedes... | 0:39:11 | 0:39:12 | |
No, no, no, don't, don't do it. Don't bad-mouth the Mercedes. | 0:39:12 | 0:39:16 | |
Don't do it, because we're in the presence | 0:39:16 | 0:39:18 | |
of another lover of classic Merc, right? | 0:39:18 | 0:39:20 | |
-Yeah, yeah, yeah. -Am I right? Now, is it true | 0:39:20 | 0:39:23 | |
that you once owned Idi Amin's Mercedes SL? | 0:39:23 | 0:39:26 | |
-JAMES LAUGHS -Erm... | 0:39:26 | 0:39:28 | |
I was in a movie called The Last King Of Scotland, | 0:39:28 | 0:39:30 | |
and at the end of that movie, they gave me this car that I drove in, | 0:39:30 | 0:39:34 | |
which I didn't know at the time | 0:39:34 | 0:39:35 | |
but it had belonged to somebody | 0:39:35 | 0:39:37 | |
and Idi Amin had given it to that person. | 0:39:37 | 0:39:40 | |
So they said at the end of the movie I could have it. | 0:39:40 | 0:39:41 | |
But, again, I didn't have a driver's licence | 0:39:41 | 0:39:44 | |
and I didn't really fancy driving it back from Uganda. | 0:39:44 | 0:39:47 | |
So I left it. I just left it there. | 0:39:47 | 0:39:50 | |
I think they gave it to my driver, he was a nice guy called Fred. | 0:39:50 | 0:39:53 | |
Nice. Way to go, Fred. | 0:39:53 | 0:39:55 | |
Right, now, it's time to find out how you went around the track | 0:39:55 | 0:39:58 | |
in our new reasonably fast car. Come on. How did it go out there? | 0:39:58 | 0:40:02 | |
Well, I don't think it went that well. But it was a tonne of fun. | 0:40:02 | 0:40:06 | |
-Well, what do you think? Let's see how you did. -OK. | 0:40:06 | 0:40:09 | |
'So, here we go, then. Soaking wet track for James. | 0:40:09 | 0:40:11 | |
'Off the line. Traction control on.' | 0:40:11 | 0:40:14 | |
Big balls. Big, big balls, that's all you need. | 0:40:14 | 0:40:17 | |
'I don't disagree with you. Coming up towards the first corner.' | 0:40:17 | 0:40:21 | |
Wetter than a waterfall in a monsoon. | 0:40:21 | 0:40:25 | |
'This braking's going to be tough. | 0:40:25 | 0:40:27 | |
'There's a direction change and also a surface change. | 0:40:27 | 0:40:29 | |
'The grip levels there are terrible. | 0:40:29 | 0:40:31 | |
'Best to stay on the track, I find, there!' | 0:40:31 | 0:40:33 | |
Shut it! | 0:40:33 | 0:40:35 | |
'Blending left, turning right into Chicago. | 0:40:35 | 0:40:38 | |
'The inside line is off the frame at the moment so, | 0:40:38 | 0:40:41 | |
'actually, there's grip around the outside.' | 0:40:41 | 0:40:42 | |
Come on! | 0:40:42 | 0:40:44 | |
'Now, this is the long drag toward Hammerhead. | 0:40:45 | 0:40:47 | |
'Big braking has triggered the warning lights, | 0:40:47 | 0:40:49 | |
'you were braking so hard, that must be good. | 0:40:49 | 0:40:51 | |
'The car's going to oversteer a bit, is it? Yeah, there it goes.' | 0:40:51 | 0:40:54 | |
Whoo! | 0:40:54 | 0:40:55 | |
'I'd like to say you caught that. It wasn't, the electronics caught it. | 0:40:55 | 0:40:58 | |
'And again! That was a mid-gear change slide. | 0:40:58 | 0:41:00 | |
'That's just showing off! | 0:41:00 | 0:41:02 | |
'Now we've got this fast right here, down towards the follow-through.' | 0:41:02 | 0:41:06 | |
TYRES SCREECH | 0:41:06 | 0:41:07 | |
Yeah! Whoo! | 0:41:07 | 0:41:10 | |
'You think you're saving that, you're not. The computer's doing it. | 0:41:10 | 0:41:13 | |
'Through the follow-through. That looks terrifying. | 0:41:13 | 0:41:16 | |
-'Oh, my Lord. It looks...' -JAMES LAUGHS | 0:41:16 | 0:41:18 | |
'You're like a sort of Scottish Ari Vatanen, aren't you? | 0:41:18 | 0:41:21 | |
'Now, coming hard into second to last, does he make the apex? | 0:41:21 | 0:41:24 | |
'He does. He clips it.' | 0:41:24 | 0:41:25 | |
-That's so slippery, isn't it? -Yeah, it's horrible. | 0:41:25 | 0:41:28 | |
'Through Gambon. Nowhere near the racing line. | 0:41:28 | 0:41:31 | |
'And over the line.' | 0:41:31 | 0:41:33 | |
-APPLAUSE -Thank you. -Good effort. | 0:41:33 | 0:41:36 | |
Honestly... | 0:41:36 | 0:41:37 | |
Can I just say, before we go anywhere, | 0:41:37 | 0:41:40 | |
it was so slippery out there today. | 0:41:40 | 0:41:43 | |
-It really was treacherous. -Yes. | 0:41:43 | 0:41:45 | |
-But it was a lot of fun because it was. -It was a good run. | 0:41:45 | 0:41:48 | |
OK, new car means a new lap board. | 0:41:48 | 0:41:50 | |
We've already had a test day where we sent a bunch of celebs | 0:41:50 | 0:41:53 | |
out in the GT 86 to lay down some markers. | 0:41:53 | 0:41:56 | |
You can watch how they did over on Extra Gear. | 0:41:56 | 0:41:58 | |
But the fastest time so far is one minute 39.5 | 0:41:58 | 0:42:02 | |
from Olympic double gold-winning gymnast Max Whitlock. | 0:42:02 | 0:42:05 | |
Oh, I loved his pommel routine, did you ever see that? | 0:42:05 | 0:42:08 | |
GENTLE LAUGHTER Elegant... Anyway, all right. | 0:42:08 | 0:42:10 | |
James, and Chris, because, frankly, this is your fault | 0:42:10 | 0:42:13 | |
if he doesn't go straight to the top, you were his instructor. Right. | 0:42:13 | 0:42:17 | |
-Feeling confident? -Mm, not really. A little bit... | 0:42:17 | 0:42:20 | |
-Come on! -Go on, show me. | 0:42:20 | 0:42:21 | |
All right. You did it in the wet, so it's a wet time. | 0:42:21 | 0:42:26 | |
-One minute...47.1. -Yes...yes.. | 0:42:26 | 0:42:33 | |
-Oh! That's not bad. That's not bad. -APPLAUSE | 0:42:33 | 0:42:35 | |
That's not bad. | 0:42:35 | 0:42:37 | |
-Thank you. That's not bad. -That's awesome. Not bad at all. | 0:42:37 | 0:42:39 | |
Right underneath Ore Oduba there. | 0:42:39 | 0:42:41 | |
-A fine effort. -Congratulations. -I'm the only one in the wet. | 0:42:41 | 0:42:44 | |
That's good. That is good. | 0:42:44 | 0:42:46 | |
Only one in the wet. | 0:42:46 | 0:42:47 | |
I think you guys will have a lot of fun this season | 0:42:47 | 0:42:49 | |
with the celebrities in that car | 0:42:49 | 0:42:51 | |
because you just can't control it | 0:42:51 | 0:42:52 | |
like you could that Cee'd that we both drove. | 0:42:52 | 0:42:54 | |
-When you say "fun", do you mean death? -Yeah! | 0:42:54 | 0:42:56 | |
LAUGHTER | 0:42:56 | 0:42:57 | |
All right, James, thank you so much for coming down and playing with us. | 0:42:57 | 0:43:00 | |
Ladies and gentlemen, James McAvoy! | 0:43:00 | 0:43:03 | |
-APPLAUSE AND WHISTLING -Thank you! | 0:43:03 | 0:43:05 | |
Now, time to return to our high-mile challenge. | 0:43:08 | 0:43:13 | |
Earlier on, the three of us each had bought a car | 0:43:13 | 0:43:15 | |
that had driven to the moon and back. | 0:43:15 | 0:43:17 | |
And we were crossing Kazakhstan | 0:43:17 | 0:43:19 | |
for an appointment with the big rocket. | 0:43:19 | 0:43:21 | |
We awoke to the chill of another morning in Kazakhstan. | 0:43:25 | 0:43:28 | |
And Chris noticed that overnight I had been busy. | 0:43:28 | 0:43:32 | |
Matt, what's going on with the back of your car? | 0:43:32 | 0:43:35 | |
Was it abducted last night by a band of amateur scaffolding people? | 0:43:35 | 0:43:38 | |
You know that the little thing you gave me | 0:43:38 | 0:43:41 | |
that lifted the ascent of the car up about four feet? | 0:43:41 | 0:43:43 | |
Well, that's me being cautious | 0:43:44 | 0:43:46 | |
and just trying to preserve the rear end of this Mercedes. | 0:43:46 | 0:43:50 | |
Despite the previous day's trials, all three of our high-milers | 0:43:50 | 0:43:54 | |
were still in the hunt for Baikonur. | 0:43:54 | 0:43:57 | |
But since we had the place to ourselves, | 0:43:57 | 0:43:59 | |
Rory had an idea to see whose car was holding together best. | 0:43:59 | 0:44:03 | |
How about a top speed challenge? | 0:44:03 | 0:44:06 | |
But here's the twist - this is all about reliability. | 0:44:06 | 0:44:09 | |
So I think we should find out whose car gets closest | 0:44:09 | 0:44:12 | |
to their manufacturer's claimed top speed. | 0:44:12 | 0:44:15 | |
-That sounds good. -Chris, you're up first. | 0:44:15 | 0:44:18 | |
And the Volvo's top speed? | 0:44:18 | 0:44:20 | |
125mph. | 0:44:20 | 0:44:23 | |
Three, two, one, go for it! | 0:44:23 | 0:44:26 | |
WHEELS SPIN | 0:44:26 | 0:44:28 | |
ENGINE ROARS | 0:44:28 | 0:44:29 | |
-It's pretty aggressive. -Yeah. | 0:44:29 | 0:44:32 | |
That's the half a million mile clutch he's working with. | 0:44:34 | 0:44:37 | |
THEY CHUCKLE | 0:44:37 | 0:44:38 | |
Come on, Volvo! | 0:44:38 | 0:44:40 | |
Fourth, come on. | 0:44:40 | 0:44:41 | |
That's 90. | 0:44:41 | 0:44:43 | |
If Volvos are as reliable as he says they are, this should be no problem. | 0:44:43 | 0:44:48 | |
I'm not even 100. | 0:44:49 | 0:44:51 | |
Not even 100, come on! | 0:44:51 | 0:44:54 | |
-How are the kids? -Good. Yours? -Yeah, not too bad. | 0:44:56 | 0:44:58 | |
-All right. -Right. | 0:45:00 | 0:45:01 | |
-How did we do? -I blame you for what just happened there. | 0:45:01 | 0:45:06 | |
I've got terrible aero and no power cos my airbox has moved | 0:45:06 | 0:45:09 | |
because you stopped your vehicle on the first challenge, and I hit you. | 0:45:09 | 0:45:14 | |
-That's my fault? -Yeah, that's your fault. | 0:45:14 | 0:45:16 | |
-Who hit who? -Who stopped? -Who hit who? -Who stopped? | 0:45:16 | 0:45:20 | |
-Who hit who? -I couldn't have hit the thing if it hadn't stopped. | 0:45:20 | 0:45:23 | |
If there's a policeman standing there, you'd be in trouble. | 0:45:23 | 0:45:26 | |
Do they have policeman at race circuits? | 0:45:26 | 0:45:28 | |
It wasn't a race circuit, we were in a hole in the ground. | 0:45:28 | 0:45:32 | |
THEY ALL LAUGH | 0:45:32 | 0:45:33 | |
Look, the news is, 104mph, | 0:45:33 | 0:45:36 | |
which is not good enough cos this thing should do 124, 125. | 0:45:36 | 0:45:39 | |
So I'm 20mph back. So go and do your worst, I'm going to lose. | 0:45:39 | 0:45:43 | |
Next up, my European E-Class, | 0:45:43 | 0:45:47 | |
with its 180 kilometres per hour top speed. | 0:45:47 | 0:45:50 | |
Go! | 0:45:50 | 0:45:52 | |
There's 100. | 0:45:55 | 0:45:57 | |
There's 120. | 0:45:58 | 0:46:00 | |
-Did they really invent apples in Kazakhstan? -Yeah, apparently. | 0:46:01 | 0:46:05 | |
I just think, if they invented the apple, | 0:46:07 | 0:46:09 | |
then we should try an actual Kazakhstani apple. | 0:46:09 | 0:46:12 | |
I'd love to have an apple. | 0:46:12 | 0:46:13 | |
155. | 0:46:13 | 0:46:16 | |
Russet's that sort of thick-skinned, amber-coloured apple, | 0:46:16 | 0:46:18 | |
delicious things. The juice from them makes a very good drink. | 0:46:18 | 0:46:22 | |
-Come on, then, what's the number? -Take a guess. | 0:46:24 | 0:46:27 | |
160. | 0:46:27 | 0:46:28 | |
-Wow, on the money. -160? -160, that's about 100 miles an hour. | 0:46:28 | 0:46:32 | |
So, by getting within about 12mph of my top speed, I had edged Chris. | 0:46:32 | 0:46:39 | |
But I'd left the door open for Rory's 81mph taxi. | 0:46:39 | 0:46:42 | |
Go! | 0:46:42 | 0:46:44 | |
-Come on, black can. -Takes off like a shot. | 0:46:44 | 0:46:47 | |
40. | 0:46:47 | 0:46:48 | |
45. | 0:46:48 | 0:46:51 | |
He was hardly the figure of humility when he won last time, | 0:46:51 | 0:46:53 | |
what's he going to be like this time? | 0:46:53 | 0:46:55 | |
81mph. | 0:46:55 | 0:46:57 | |
Ahhh! Yeah! | 0:46:57 | 0:46:59 | |
Unbearable. | 0:46:59 | 0:47:00 | |
RORY LAUGHS | 0:47:00 | 0:47:03 | |
It just gets better with time. | 0:47:03 | 0:47:05 | |
Like a fine wine. | 0:47:05 | 0:47:07 | |
Right, gentlemen. | 0:47:07 | 0:47:09 | |
Give me the good news or the bad news. | 0:47:09 | 0:47:11 | |
Well, I'm afraid it's bad news for you, but good news for me. | 0:47:11 | 0:47:15 | |
I managed 84mph. | 0:47:15 | 0:47:17 | |
3mph more than the manufacturer's quoted top speed. | 0:47:19 | 0:47:23 | |
-What? -84mph. -Really? | 0:47:23 | 0:47:26 | |
-Hey, come on, you got to give it up for the taxi, right? -Yeah. | 0:47:26 | 0:47:29 | |
-I guess so, yeah. -Jump back in your cars, see if you can keep up. | 0:47:29 | 0:47:33 | |
Nice one... | 0:47:35 | 0:47:36 | |
(A-hole.) | 0:47:36 | 0:47:37 | |
I didn't expect the taxi to go faster than it did | 0:47:39 | 0:47:43 | |
when it left the factory. | 0:47:43 | 0:47:45 | |
That's amazing. | 0:47:45 | 0:47:46 | |
With begrudging respect for the black cab, we headed on. | 0:47:46 | 0:47:50 | |
And before long, I made a discovery. | 0:47:50 | 0:47:53 | |
Hey, there's a David Hasselhoff cassette in the stereo. | 0:47:53 | 0:47:57 | |
Check it out. | 0:47:57 | 0:47:58 | |
# I've been looking for freedom | 0:47:58 | 0:48:01 | |
# But it can't be found... # | 0:48:01 | 0:48:05 | |
He's been looking for freedom, but it can't be found. | 0:48:06 | 0:48:09 | |
But as the hours dragged on... | 0:48:14 | 0:48:16 | |
I'm finding the flatness quite imposing now. | 0:48:18 | 0:48:21 | |
You wouldn't want to break down out here, would you? | 0:48:23 | 0:48:25 | |
..we were told to head to our last overnight stop... | 0:48:28 | 0:48:31 | |
So that's it, that's quite literally the end of the road. | 0:48:31 | 0:48:34 | |
..located somewhere within the vast emptiness | 0:48:34 | 0:48:37 | |
that surrounded the Baikonur Cosmodrome. | 0:48:37 | 0:48:40 | |
That's a dried up salt bed. | 0:48:46 | 0:48:48 | |
Wow! | 0:48:48 | 0:48:50 | |
That's like Kazakhstan's Bonneville. | 0:48:50 | 0:48:52 | |
Driving on into the dark, inky gloom, | 0:49:02 | 0:49:05 | |
eventually we arrived at our overnight stop | 0:49:05 | 0:49:09 | |
where our final challenge awaited. | 0:49:09 | 0:49:12 | |
-Oh, hello. -What does it say? | 0:49:13 | 0:49:16 | |
It says, "Tomorrow you drive to Baikonur. | 0:49:16 | 0:49:20 | |
"You must reach the border gate by 2pm. | 0:49:20 | 0:49:23 | |
"At 9am tomorrow, your mileage trips will be reset. | 0:49:23 | 0:49:26 | |
"The winner is the high-miler that racks up the most miles | 0:49:26 | 0:49:30 | |
"over the subsequent five hours. | 0:49:30 | 0:49:33 | |
"Only the winning car will attend the launch. | 0:49:33 | 0:49:36 | |
"The two losing cars will be sentenced to hard labour." | 0:49:36 | 0:49:39 | |
All right, OK. | 0:49:39 | 0:49:41 | |
# I'm looking for freedom... # | 0:49:41 | 0:49:44 | |
You know what I'm going to do when I get home? | 0:49:44 | 0:49:46 | |
I'm going to dig out my Hoff collection. | 0:49:46 | 0:49:48 | |
You should go to a doctor. | 0:49:48 | 0:49:49 | |
With the rest of the night to consider our strategies... | 0:49:51 | 0:49:55 | |
..the next morning, we awoke to a tantalising sight. | 0:49:56 | 0:49:59 | |
-Oh, wow! -Oh, yeah, look at that! | 0:50:04 | 0:50:07 | |
Yes, the Baikonur Cosmodrome was almost within reach. | 0:50:07 | 0:50:11 | |
But with our trip meters covered and reset, | 0:50:15 | 0:50:17 | |
first there was a challenge to win. | 0:50:17 | 0:50:19 | |
And Chris was late. | 0:50:19 | 0:50:22 | |
LAUGHTER | 0:50:22 | 0:50:26 | |
What have you done? | 0:50:26 | 0:50:28 | |
Mind your own business, Matthew. | 0:50:28 | 0:50:31 | |
All right, all right. Most miles when we get to Baikonur wins. | 0:50:32 | 0:50:36 | |
Three...two... | 0:50:36 | 0:50:38 | |
one, let's rock. | 0:50:38 | 0:50:40 | |
If he's going to roar it, why's he not moving? | 0:50:43 | 0:50:45 | |
I don't know, and maybe the taxi finally packed it in. | 0:50:45 | 0:50:48 | |
So, clearly I'm not going to beat those guys in a head-to-head race. | 0:50:49 | 0:50:52 | |
I need to be smart about this challenge, | 0:50:52 | 0:50:55 | |
and approach things with a bit more cunning. | 0:50:55 | 0:50:58 | |
A cagey start from the others, | 0:51:00 | 0:51:02 | |
but my plan was simple - | 0:51:02 | 0:51:03 | |
more speed means more miles. | 0:51:03 | 0:51:06 | |
The easy way to make your car quicker is to lose weight. | 0:51:06 | 0:51:09 | |
Seats are gone, | 0:51:09 | 0:51:10 | |
door panels gone. | 0:51:10 | 0:51:12 | |
And I figured the best place to take my new superlight racer | 0:51:13 | 0:51:17 | |
was back to Kazakhstan's Bonneville. | 0:51:17 | 0:51:19 | |
Even if that did mean... | 0:51:19 | 0:51:22 | |
another lengthy, off-road drive to reach it. | 0:51:22 | 0:51:25 | |
Meanwhile, in Harris's Volvo... | 0:51:27 | 0:51:29 | |
Ha-ha, a road! | 0:51:29 | 0:51:31 | |
..Chris was heading for a nearby town | 0:51:31 | 0:51:34 | |
with his own harebrained strategy. | 0:51:34 | 0:51:36 | |
Speed is in the mind, so to change my mind-set, | 0:51:36 | 0:51:40 | |
I've invoked Volvo's racing history here. | 0:51:40 | 0:51:44 | |
You remember? | 0:51:46 | 0:51:47 | |
The year was 1994 and British touring car legend | 0:51:47 | 0:51:50 | |
Rickard Rydell debuted the Volvo 850 Estate. | 0:51:50 | 0:51:53 | |
Surely the coolest estate car ever. | 0:51:57 | 0:51:59 | |
Add to that a...perfectly safe range-extending fuel tank | 0:52:02 | 0:52:05 | |
and you have the ultimate high-mileage maker. | 0:52:05 | 0:52:08 | |
I just needed somewhere to use it. | 0:52:08 | 0:52:10 | |
So, I did a bit of research last night. | 0:52:10 | 0:52:12 | |
There is an airfield near here, I don't quite know where, | 0:52:12 | 0:52:15 | |
but I know it's nearby. | 0:52:15 | 0:52:17 | |
The second thing I did last night was to learn a Russian phrase. | 0:52:17 | 0:52:21 | |
"Where's the airfield?" | 0:52:21 | 0:52:22 | |
Here we are, I'll ask this woman here. | 0:52:22 | 0:52:24 | |
SPEAKS RUSSIAN | 0:52:24 | 0:52:28 | |
No, she didn't want to know. | 0:52:28 | 0:52:30 | |
She didn't want to... | 0:52:30 | 0:52:32 | |
'Now, while the others wasted valuable time | 0:52:32 | 0:52:35 | |
'finding places they could up the pace...' | 0:52:35 | 0:52:38 | |
Into gear. | 0:52:38 | 0:52:39 | |
Now for some revs. | 0:52:42 | 0:52:43 | |
'..I opted for a short cut.' | 0:52:43 | 0:52:46 | |
Right, this is it. | 0:52:48 | 0:52:50 | |
Let the high mileage begin. | 0:52:50 | 0:52:53 | |
Woohoo! | 0:52:56 | 0:52:58 | |
SPEAKS RUSSIAN | 0:52:59 | 0:53:01 | |
No, that's not happening. | 0:53:01 | 0:53:03 | |
Though I swear I heard one of them say, "Is that Rickard Rydell?" | 0:53:03 | 0:53:06 | |
SPEAKS RUSSIAN | 0:53:06 | 0:53:09 | |
That was it. | 0:53:20 | 0:53:21 | |
We're on. This direction. | 0:53:21 | 0:53:23 | |
Woohoo! | 0:53:26 | 0:53:28 | |
Now, this is what I call easy miles. | 0:53:30 | 0:53:33 | |
Nice and soft terrain, not too hard on the car. | 0:53:33 | 0:53:36 | |
RUMBLING AND CLANKING | 0:53:36 | 0:53:40 | |
What the hell was that? | 0:53:42 | 0:53:43 | |
Something's come wildly loose, | 0:53:45 | 0:53:46 | |
I don't know if it's that bar on the back or what. | 0:53:46 | 0:53:49 | |
In fact, it was worse. | 0:53:49 | 0:53:52 | |
And with no time to lose, | 0:53:52 | 0:53:53 | |
the Mercedes needed the delicate touch of a professional. | 0:53:53 | 0:53:57 | |
Saved a little more weight. | 0:54:10 | 0:54:11 | |
After a slow start over in the Volvo... | 0:54:19 | 0:54:21 | |
..Rickard Rydell had finally found his airfield. | 0:54:22 | 0:54:26 | |
100 miles an hour. | 0:54:29 | 0:54:31 | |
What a place! | 0:54:33 | 0:54:34 | |
High banking at Daytona. | 0:54:37 | 0:54:39 | |
I really like this car. | 0:54:39 | 0:54:40 | |
She may be old, she may be almost worn out, | 0:54:40 | 0:54:44 | |
but she's got heart, she really does. | 0:54:44 | 0:54:46 | |
'After three hours of flat-out, lightweight racing though...' | 0:54:46 | 0:54:51 | |
A fuel light just came on. | 0:54:51 | 0:54:53 | |
'..it was time to start the long drive back.' | 0:54:53 | 0:54:56 | |
OK, Baikonur! | 0:54:56 | 0:54:58 | |
Now, Rory was also running low on fuel, but he had thought ahead. | 0:55:00 | 0:55:04 | |
-Ouch! -BLEEP! | 0:55:07 | 0:55:09 | |
No! | 0:55:15 | 0:55:17 | |
Oh, that is dead. | 0:55:22 | 0:55:24 | |
That's dead, isn't it? That's definitely dead. | 0:55:27 | 0:55:30 | |
Oh, man! | 0:55:32 | 0:55:34 | |
Back in my range-extended Volvo, things were looking tasty. | 0:55:34 | 0:55:40 | |
I'm averaging a lot of miles an hour here. | 0:55:41 | 0:55:44 | |
A lot of miles an hour. | 0:55:44 | 0:55:46 | |
And while I was piling on the miles, Matt... | 0:55:47 | 0:55:50 | |
wasn't. | 0:55:50 | 0:55:51 | |
All right, finally a little bit of smooth road. | 0:55:51 | 0:55:54 | |
CLUNKING | 0:55:54 | 0:55:56 | |
Oh, spoke too soon. | 0:55:56 | 0:55:59 | |
But then, somehow... | 0:55:59 | 0:56:01 | |
..the cab was back. | 0:56:03 | 0:56:05 | |
How is this car still running? Unbelievable! | 0:56:07 | 0:56:10 | |
I love this car. | 0:56:13 | 0:56:14 | |
We're a team. | 0:56:15 | 0:56:18 | |
Whatever happens, we're a team. | 0:56:18 | 0:56:20 | |
'And at last...' | 0:56:22 | 0:56:23 | |
This is it, this is it. | 0:56:23 | 0:56:25 | |
'..this team reached the entrance to the Cosmodrome.' | 0:56:25 | 0:56:28 | |
I'm the first one here, | 0:56:28 | 0:56:30 | |
so I may as well do a few of my legendary tiny turning circles. | 0:56:30 | 0:56:34 | |
Every mile counts. Every mile counts. | 0:56:34 | 0:56:37 | |
And with just a few minutes left... | 0:56:39 | 0:56:42 | |
Hey, there you are! | 0:56:42 | 0:56:44 | |
..it was a desperate fight to add distance. | 0:56:44 | 0:56:48 | |
I can add some miles too, man, two can play at that game. | 0:56:48 | 0:56:52 | |
Where's Harris? | 0:56:55 | 0:56:57 | |
-Oh, -BLEEP! | 0:56:59 | 0:57:01 | |
Rory, Rory, that's it. Two o'clock. Two o'clock, the party is over. | 0:57:03 | 0:57:08 | |
How's your head? Dizzy? | 0:57:11 | 0:57:13 | |
Dizzy. | 0:57:13 | 0:57:14 | |
That is becoming his signature look. | 0:57:16 | 0:57:18 | |
Maybe he can't see where he's going. | 0:57:18 | 0:57:20 | |
-Gentlemen. -How did you do? | 0:57:22 | 0:57:24 | |
-Well, quietly confident, but let's see what happens. -Who's this? | 0:57:24 | 0:57:29 | |
He must be checking the mileage. | 0:57:29 | 0:57:31 | |
He's got a lovely wrist action on that ratchet. | 0:57:34 | 0:57:37 | |
-Thank you, thank you very much. -OK, Matt. | 0:57:38 | 0:57:41 | |
OK, I have here the results. | 0:57:43 | 0:57:47 | |
In third place, with 211 miles... | 0:57:47 | 0:57:50 | |
Mr Chris Harris. | 0:57:50 | 0:57:52 | |
-Oh! -Congratulations. | 0:57:52 | 0:57:54 | |
In second place, with 284 miles... | 0:57:58 | 0:58:01 | |
-..Mr Matt LeBlanc. -Come on! | 0:58:03 | 0:58:06 | |
-That's right. -Say it, say it. | 0:58:06 | 0:58:09 | |
In first place, with 329 miles, Mr Rory Reid in the black taxi. | 0:58:09 | 0:58:16 | |
Way to go, man. | 0:58:17 | 0:58:19 | |
Hang on, hang on, look at this. | 0:58:21 | 0:58:23 | |
Oh, really? Is that what's happening? | 0:58:24 | 0:58:28 | |
The losers lose their cars. | 0:58:29 | 0:58:31 | |
'So we had our winner. | 0:58:33 | 0:58:34 | |
'And as the others set off toward their new life of service | 0:58:34 | 0:58:38 | |
'on the Kazakh Steppe...' | 0:58:38 | 0:58:40 | |
I'd become rather fond of my Volvo, Matt. | 0:58:40 | 0:58:43 | |
Yeah, I'm going to miss that old car. | 0:58:43 | 0:58:46 | |
'The truth is, all our high-milers had proven their worth. | 0:58:46 | 0:58:50 | |
'And now, all that remained were the last few miles | 0:58:50 | 0:58:54 | |
'into the heart of the Cosmodrome and the launch site. | 0:58:54 | 0:58:57 | |
'This would be the black cab's victory lap.' | 0:58:57 | 0:59:00 | |
-Where you headed? -Rocket launch? -Jump in. | 0:59:00 | 0:59:03 | |
And it gave us a chance to consider something. | 0:59:04 | 0:59:08 | |
You see, to most people, cars are just a tool, a runaround. | 0:59:08 | 0:59:12 | |
You might run one for 60, 70, | 0:59:13 | 0:59:17 | |
even 100,000 miles and think it's had its day. | 0:59:17 | 0:59:20 | |
But the truth is, it could do so much more.' | 0:59:20 | 0:59:24 | |
Back in the '50s, the US and Soviet Union's fierce battle | 0:59:24 | 0:59:28 | |
for global engineering dominance propelled mankind into space. | 0:59:28 | 0:59:33 | |
The Cold War thawed just for a moment | 0:59:34 | 0:59:37 | |
as the world stood in collective wonder at what we could achieve. | 0:59:37 | 0:59:42 | |
It was an event that marked one of the most intense periods | 0:59:42 | 0:59:46 | |
of technological development in human history - | 0:59:46 | 0:59:49 | |
and it brought us to today, where right now, | 0:59:49 | 0:59:53 | |
sat on your driveway, you could have a car, | 0:59:53 | 0:59:56 | |
a car, that's been so well engineered, | 0:59:56 | 1:00:01 | |
it'll go the distance to the moon and back, and beyond. | 1:00:01 | 1:00:05 | |
Wow! | 1:00:11 | 1:00:12 | |
I still can't get that Hasselhoff song out of my head. | 1:01:15 | 1:01:18 | |
THEY LAUGH | 1:01:18 | 1:01:20 | |
APPLAUSE | 1:01:20 | 1:01:24 | |
Amazing cars, indestructible. Indestructible. | 1:01:24 | 1:01:27 | |
OK, so, Rory, we know why our cars aren't here, | 1:01:27 | 1:01:31 | |
they're doing hard labour in Kazakhstan. | 1:01:31 | 1:01:33 | |
But where's your little black cab, | 1:01:33 | 1:01:35 | |
did you not want to drive it back the 3,000 miles from Baikonur? | 1:01:35 | 1:01:37 | |
I'd have loved to have driven my taxi home, | 1:01:37 | 1:01:40 | |
but it had a higher calling, a public duty. | 1:01:40 | 1:01:42 | |
Check this out. | 1:01:42 | 1:01:43 | |
See that? | 1:01:43 | 1:01:44 | |
APPLAUSE | 1:01:44 | 1:01:47 | |
That's been immortalised, OK? It's a symbol of hope. | 1:01:49 | 1:01:53 | |
Yeah, you know, that was really nice. | 1:01:53 | 1:01:56 | |
The good men and women of Baikonur, | 1:01:56 | 1:01:58 | |
they can look up at your humble taxi, | 1:01:58 | 1:02:01 | |
symbol of Britain, of London, | 1:02:01 | 1:02:03 | |
and think, thank God I don't have to drive one of those. | 1:02:03 | 1:02:05 | |
Don't hate a winner, Matt. | 1:02:05 | 1:02:07 | |
-Don't do the dance, don't do the dance. -No dancing. | 1:02:07 | 1:02:10 | |
OK, next week, convertible supercars in the USA, | 1:02:10 | 1:02:14 | |
the Alfa Romeo Giulia and one very broken windscreen. | 1:02:14 | 1:02:17 | |
-Thanks for watching. -Yeah, we'll see you all next week. | 1:02:17 | 1:02:20 | |
-ALL: -Goodnight. | 1:02:20 | 1:02:21 |