Poetry Slam Grand Final

0:00:01 > 0:00:05CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:00:05 > 0:00:08Helloooo!

0:00:08 > 0:00:10Hello!

0:00:10 > 0:00:12Wow! There's lots of people here.

0:00:12 > 0:00:14There's people here, Sophia, we're fine.

0:00:16 > 0:00:21Welcome to the BBC 2014 Edinburgh Festival Slam.

0:00:21 > 0:00:25My name's Kevin Cadwallender, and I'm one of your hosts for tonight.

0:00:25 > 0:00:29I'm going to bring on my co-host in a minute, because...

0:00:29 > 0:00:32- ..I get really tired. - AUDIENCE: Awww!

0:00:33 > 0:00:38And sometimes I just need some, erm, enthusiasm.

0:00:39 > 0:00:43So I'm going to bring to the stage my co-host, Sophia Walker,

0:00:43 > 0:00:48who is the current BBC Slam champion...

0:00:48 > 0:00:52until about, ooh, quarter past ten.

0:00:52 > 0:00:54Here she is. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:00:56 > 0:00:57Thank you!

0:00:59 > 0:01:03Erm, there are many other things to say about Sophia.

0:01:03 > 0:01:05They're all irrelevant.

0:01:05 > 0:01:08They were irrelevant, but she is a Saboteur award winner

0:01:08 > 0:01:11for her show in the Edinburgh Festival.

0:01:11 > 0:01:13There are many, many things to talk about.

0:01:13 > 0:01:15- (WHISPERING) Free show! - Free shows at the Fringe.

0:01:17 > 0:01:18You know...

0:01:18 > 0:01:21when it starts, I might even take my coat off.

0:01:21 > 0:01:22AUDIENCE: Whoo!

0:01:22 > 0:01:26Hold on to your pocket. It's getting serious in here already.

0:01:26 > 0:01:29HE SCOFFS How can you cope with the excitement?

0:01:29 > 0:01:35Erm, before we begin the slam proper, we have judges...

0:01:35 > 0:01:40for slams. Did you know that? Yes, we do.

0:01:40 > 0:01:42Not them.

0:01:42 > 0:01:44That's Mike, who's doing the scorekeeping.

0:01:44 > 0:01:47How do?

0:01:47 > 0:01:49We've called him Vorder Man.

0:01:51 > 0:01:55And this is Meera, who's doing the timekeeping.

0:01:55 > 0:01:57Without a whistle.

0:01:57 > 0:02:00And one of our judges is Eleanor Livingstone,

0:02:00 > 0:02:02who's the festival director of StAnza,

0:02:02 > 0:02:05which is one of the... oh, the biggest festivals...

0:02:05 > 0:02:08well, certainly the biggest poetry festival in Scotland

0:02:08 > 0:02:10and maybe the entire universe.

0:02:13 > 0:02:18So, to the stage, Eleanor Livingstone.

0:02:18 > 0:02:19APPLAUSE You can do better than that.

0:02:19 > 0:02:22Come on! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:02:26 > 0:02:27Good evening!

0:02:29 > 0:02:34Poetry doesn't get any more competitive than a slam.

0:02:35 > 0:02:39But all poets have to sell their poetry.

0:02:40 > 0:02:46So this is a suggestion of one way of doing that.

0:02:46 > 0:02:48This poem is...

0:02:48 > 0:02:50Sales Pitch.

0:02:51 > 0:02:56This poem has been designed

0:02:56 > 0:03:01To maximise your textual experience

0:03:02 > 0:03:06It's constructed from a special fabric

0:03:06 > 0:03:11As soft and unlikely as moths' wings

0:03:11 > 0:03:15Woven into strong lines

0:03:15 > 0:03:21And injected with pockets of brilliant white space

0:03:22 > 0:03:28It will fill your garden with daffodils in April

0:03:28 > 0:03:31And birdsong every evening

0:03:31 > 0:03:36When you pass the window, it will wave

0:03:37 > 0:03:43It won't melt in the sun and drip...

0:03:43 > 0:03:45drip...

0:03:45 > 0:03:46drip

0:03:46 > 0:03:50No sticky fingers

0:03:50 > 0:03:56It will keep you warm in bed on winter nights

0:03:56 > 0:04:04In July, it will waft cool words over sweating limbs

0:04:04 > 0:04:12And even make you sigh softly or shout out

0:04:12 > 0:04:16When you're coming to the last line

0:04:17 > 0:04:19But only...

0:04:19 > 0:04:21if you buy it.

0:04:30 > 0:04:34This is my microphone stand. It doubles as a Zimmer frame.

0:04:36 > 0:04:41Our second judge for tonight is Fay Roberts. Whoo!

0:04:41 > 0:04:42CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:04:44 > 0:04:47And, erm...Fay Roberts runs Hammer & Tongue,

0:04:47 > 0:04:49a great spoken-word night, in Cambridge.

0:04:49 > 0:04:53She has Other Voices show at the Festival - go and see that -

0:04:53 > 0:04:56and Allographic Press, many other things.

0:04:56 > 0:04:59Fay Roberts! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:05:04 > 0:05:07Hello, everyone. You all ready for a fantastic night?

0:05:07 > 0:05:09- AUDIENCE: Yes! - Oh, yes, I think so.

0:05:09 > 0:05:12Erm, the thing about poetry is it's something we use

0:05:12 > 0:05:17to express those things that we find difficult to say in other words,

0:05:17 > 0:05:20those dark, those difficult things.

0:05:20 > 0:05:26It's those things that we use to say, "Hey, I hope you get this,

0:05:26 > 0:05:27"but I also hope that you don't,

0:05:27 > 0:05:31"because I hope you haven't been through this darkness."

0:05:32 > 0:05:36This isn't one of those kind of poems.

0:05:36 > 0:05:39This, in fact, is my one and only bona fide love poem...

0:05:39 > 0:05:42that I...share with the public.

0:05:42 > 0:05:44It's called Song To The Sea.

0:05:45 > 0:05:49A glance disarms my invention

0:05:49 > 0:05:53My tongue tangles itself, tripping me to drown headlong in two eyes

0:05:53 > 0:05:56Like the sea at sunrise -

0:05:56 > 0:06:01the exact colour of a long, drawn-out summer dawn in Orkney,

0:06:01 > 0:06:04reflected.

0:06:04 > 0:06:07Brain neglected, I happily bob and sway

0:06:07 > 0:06:12Shamelessly - well, nearly - adrift in the sea of your regard.

0:06:13 > 0:06:15That small shame

0:06:15 > 0:06:18That crimson shame threads through the blue

0:06:18 > 0:06:20Like spice - cutting those cool sensations

0:06:20 > 0:06:22with hot, sharp intentions -

0:06:22 > 0:06:24The edge to every catching breath

0:06:24 > 0:06:27Striking deeper and deeper into my chest

0:06:27 > 0:06:30with every push and cresting wave

0:06:30 > 0:06:35and every tug and sighing release.

0:06:35 > 0:06:38Oh, my love, for you I'd turn sailor

0:06:38 > 0:06:40Learn to read the weather of your ways

0:06:40 > 0:06:43And ride the tides of your affections.

0:06:43 > 0:06:45No longer shipwrecked, I'd learn...

0:06:45 > 0:06:48No longer shipwrecked, I'd reconstruct your gifts -

0:06:48 > 0:06:51Those glances given, smiles bestowed and words exchanged

0:06:51 > 0:06:56Then, on that craft of sighs and hungry nights

0:06:56 > 0:06:57I'd traverse you until I lost

0:06:57 > 0:06:59All sight of land

0:06:59 > 0:07:03And there, rocked on the belly of the murmuring mystery

0:07:03 > 0:07:07I'd weave my net of words and music and cast to catch the moonlight

0:07:07 > 0:07:11Glinting from your wavetops, and bring it home with me

0:07:12 > 0:07:15Come, mermaid, and I'll sing to you

0:07:15 > 0:07:17To tell you of the love between the elements.

0:07:17 > 0:07:22You'd see me true and sure to you - holding, encircling

0:07:22 > 0:07:24Delineating but never limiting

0:07:24 > 0:07:29Smiling as again and again you throw yourself into my arms

0:07:29 > 0:07:32And run your fingers down my cheek

0:07:32 > 0:07:36With a sigh like all the world's hurt...

0:07:37 > 0:07:40..easing.

0:07:41 > 0:07:44Thank you. Have a great night. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:07:52 > 0:07:59Thank you, Fay. Our third judge and final judge is Michelle Madsen.

0:07:59 > 0:08:01- Whoo! - AUDIENCE: Whoo!

0:08:03 > 0:08:06Michelle Madsen's a poet and journalist.

0:08:06 > 0:08:08She runs Hammer & Tongue in London,

0:08:08 > 0:08:12which is kind of the UK's biggest poetry network, really.

0:08:12 > 0:08:13So...

0:08:14 > 0:08:16..let's get her to the stage.

0:08:16 > 0:08:18She's read on four continents,

0:08:18 > 0:08:20so she may as well read on the continent of Scotland.

0:08:20 > 0:08:22I didn't do geography.

0:08:22 > 0:08:24Michelle Madsen! CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:08:29 > 0:08:32Hello. I hope that you have a very fabulous evening here.

0:08:32 > 0:08:35So, you heard a love poem from Fay.

0:08:35 > 0:08:39This is a bit more of a sort of anti-love poem.

0:08:39 > 0:08:40This is more along the lines

0:08:40 > 0:08:43of you met someone who is the perfect person for you

0:08:43 > 0:08:45and then you meet their girlfriend.

0:08:48 > 0:08:51The night you said, "Beautiful"

0:08:51 > 0:08:53I laughed, my ribs out

0:08:53 > 0:08:57In great bowers of bent, roped bone which broke from me

0:08:57 > 0:09:00Choking my protests in calcified smiles

0:09:00 > 0:09:03Beaching eventually on the ashen fireside tiles.

0:09:03 > 0:09:05And I thought that night

0:09:05 > 0:09:09I thought, "This is all a tremendous joke."

0:09:10 > 0:09:13That night, we built a table out of those marble arcs

0:09:13 > 0:09:15And lined it with the lace of ancient brides

0:09:15 > 0:09:18And the pink silk of pigs' ears

0:09:18 > 0:09:22Which pricked up to hear you laugh that thick, rich mirth

0:09:22 > 0:09:26Which stoppered all our wounds in a liniment of tumbling decibels.

0:09:27 > 0:09:31That night, your generosity could have tempted retiring icebergs

0:09:31 > 0:09:32Into the sweltering gulf

0:09:32 > 0:09:38Where petrified starfish would ease in the aching meltwater.

0:09:38 > 0:09:41That night, your generosity could have begged a pause

0:09:41 > 0:09:43from a heaving coal train's snort and mass

0:09:43 > 0:09:45Better than an entire horizon of red flags

0:09:45 > 0:09:49held up by 29 boiler-suited protesters.

0:09:50 > 0:09:54That night, you wore your generosity stitched around your neck

0:09:54 > 0:09:57in a cravat of courtesy.

0:09:57 > 0:10:00I searched in the arrows of the print for a caveat of infidelity

0:10:00 > 0:10:03Made out and pointing to me

0:10:03 > 0:10:07But you soothed the edges of her sadness

0:10:07 > 0:10:08Her night fizz balked at you

0:10:08 > 0:10:11With the tight-sprung release of so many spring lambs

0:10:11 > 0:10:17Those boundless, leaping mutes bleating soundlessly into the dawn

0:10:17 > 0:10:22And I stand alone and leave you with a gift of seven lemons.

0:10:22 > 0:10:26Strung up to dry in the August heat, they have lost their bitterness

0:10:26 > 0:10:28Tanned by the sun, they are almost sweet

0:10:29 > 0:10:31You palm the fruit carefully

0:10:31 > 0:10:35As if its blanched skin would bleach the humanity from your fingertips

0:10:35 > 0:10:37But the fruit is innocent

0:10:37 > 0:10:40And I will wait for years for the ears of your eyes to open

0:10:40 > 0:10:42And the eyes of your ears to awake

0:10:42 > 0:10:45And until then, I am forbidden

0:10:45 > 0:10:49I will sit between you like an unbloodied Banquo freezing the air

0:10:49 > 0:10:52I will make time still.

0:10:52 > 0:10:53Thank you very much!

0:11:02 > 0:11:05Well, that's my exercise over for this week.

0:11:07 > 0:11:09Hello. And now we're going to start the slam proper.

0:11:09 > 0:11:13Erm, but before we do that...

0:11:13 > 0:11:15That's not really starting, then, is it?

0:11:15 > 0:11:18- Well, kinda. - We're poets. We're supposed to be

0:11:18 > 0:11:20- specific with words. - I discovered this.

0:11:20 > 0:11:22This is The Slam Prayer,

0:11:22 > 0:11:27which was found on the back of a beer mat in Chicago by Slam Papi.

0:11:27 > 0:11:31Our slam, which art with Kevin and Sophia

0:11:31 > 0:11:34Now that young Dawkins is in Tasmania

0:11:36 > 0:11:38Loud be thy name

0:11:38 > 0:11:39Thy winner come

0:11:39 > 0:11:41Judges will be done

0:11:41 > 0:11:45On earth as it is in Edinburgh

0:11:45 > 0:11:49Give us this night the gift of memory

0:11:49 > 0:11:51And forgive us our swearwords

0:11:51 > 0:11:55As we will eventually forgive the winner who shall come before us

0:11:57 > 0:12:00And lead us not into the Banshee Labyrinth

0:12:00 > 0:12:05Or to shows which keep us out without sleep for days

0:12:05 > 0:12:08Unless it be your will

0:12:08 > 0:12:12And we can blame you or you can sign our medical certificates

0:12:13 > 0:12:18For thine is the BBC Slam final

0:12:18 > 0:12:21May we be powerful and glorious

0:12:21 > 0:12:25And enthusiastic with the obvious exception of Kevin

0:12:27 > 0:12:28For ever and ever

0:12:28 > 0:12:32Or at least until about ten o'clock

0:12:32 > 0:12:34When all hell will break loose

0:12:34 > 0:12:37- Amen... - AUDIENCE: Amen!

0:12:37 > 0:12:39..And A-woman.

0:12:39 > 0:12:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:12:41 > 0:12:45So, erm, Kevin mentioned foul language in there,

0:12:45 > 0:12:48and you've had a foul-language warning, but this is a poetry slam.

0:12:48 > 0:12:51These poets are going to come up here... This is bloodthirsty.

0:12:51 > 0:12:54People are going to be getting into some tough topics.

0:12:54 > 0:12:56We don't know what they're going to say.

0:12:56 > 0:12:59Some of it might be quite risky. We apologise to you in advance.

0:12:59 > 0:13:01But this is the point where you brace yourselves.

0:13:01 > 0:13:05That said, you are a very important part of these events.

0:13:05 > 0:13:09I was listening to you back there during the judges' poems,

0:13:09 > 0:13:13and while their poems were excellent you were just woefully disappointing.

0:13:14 > 0:13:19You need to react. One third of the poets' score is your reaction.

0:13:19 > 0:13:22I mean, you're about as much as Kevin is.

0:13:22 > 0:13:25A little bit more enthusiasm from everyone in this tent

0:13:25 > 0:13:27would not go amiss.

0:13:27 > 0:13:28SHE CLEARS HER THROAT

0:13:28 > 0:13:31CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:13:31 > 0:13:32About time!

0:13:35 > 0:13:38OK, well, all the other rules are rather boring, so forget them.

0:13:38 > 0:13:41This is the important one. He can do them.

0:13:41 > 0:13:43What we need you to do is we need you to react.

0:13:43 > 0:13:47So a poet comes on this stage and he does something rather good,

0:13:47 > 0:13:50pretty impressive. You know, way above school quality.

0:13:50 > 0:13:52This is like "free bottle of wine with dinner" good.

0:13:52 > 0:13:54What does that sound like?

0:13:54 > 0:13:56CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:13:57 > 0:14:01All right. The next poet comes on.

0:14:01 > 0:14:02This is the equivalent of having

0:14:02 > 0:14:06Caitlin Moran and Sue Perkins permanently in your living room.

0:14:06 > 0:14:08WILD CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:14:12 > 0:14:15All right. The next poet comes on.

0:14:15 > 0:14:19This poem was so earth-shatteringly transformative

0:14:19 > 0:14:22you have been promoted at work.

0:14:22 > 0:14:24We are now living in a country

0:14:24 > 0:14:26where Edinburgh has the climate of Tenerife.

0:14:26 > 0:14:28The world has shifted. What does that sound like?

0:14:28 > 0:14:30EVEN LOUDER CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:14:33 > 0:14:37We need to keep the energy right up here all night.

0:14:37 > 0:14:40I did this last year. This is terrifying.

0:14:40 > 0:14:44The least you owe those poets back there is that level of noise.

0:14:44 > 0:14:49The rules are the poets come on in the order that they've been selected

0:14:49 > 0:14:51and they have three minutes in each round.

0:14:51 > 0:14:54So we go through the first round. But first,

0:14:54 > 0:14:59we need a further sacrifice. We do need a further sacrifice.

0:15:00 > 0:15:02For the gods of poetry.

0:15:04 > 0:15:11OK, so our sacrificial poet is the Farrago UK Slam champion,

0:15:11 > 0:15:14Sara Hirsch. CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:15:25 > 0:15:28I meet you at Natalie's birthday

0:15:28 > 0:15:31In a Soho swanky far-too-fancy bar

0:15:31 > 0:15:32You know who you are

0:15:32 > 0:15:35You're the friend of a friend with the flamboyant tie

0:15:35 > 0:15:37And the pinstripe perfect suit

0:15:37 > 0:15:39"The corporate guy"

0:15:39 > 0:15:42I ask your name and you reply With a confident "Simon...

0:15:42 > 0:15:43"But you can call me Si"

0:15:43 > 0:15:47And I sigh to myself and I try to like you

0:15:47 > 0:15:48We're chatting casually

0:15:48 > 0:15:51I'm clutching an overpriced G & T and you're telling me

0:15:51 > 0:15:54That you work in IT And your office is over in Battersea

0:15:54 > 0:15:56And THAT'S how you know Natalie!

0:15:56 > 0:15:59Oh, I see, she does your marketing for you, does she?

0:15:59 > 0:16:02"Ha! How funny," I laugh Even though it isn't remotely

0:16:03 > 0:16:05I order another drink and so do you

0:16:05 > 0:16:07And then comes the question

0:16:07 > 0:16:10"So, what do you do?"

0:16:10 > 0:16:13And for a moment, I consider lying Tell you I work in admin

0:16:13 > 0:16:16But you're staring at me and smiling And there's no point in denying it

0:16:16 > 0:16:18And before you know it I'm replying with...

0:16:19 > 0:16:21"I'm a children's entertainer"

0:16:21 > 0:16:24And I know you want to laugh Most people do

0:16:24 > 0:16:26And then, so predictably You look at me and frown

0:16:26 > 0:16:29"So, you're a clown"

0:16:29 > 0:16:32And it's in that moment that I want to say this

0:16:33 > 0:16:36You know on Sunday morning When you're snoring in your bed

0:16:36 > 0:16:38Recovering from your nine to five?

0:16:38 > 0:16:39Well, instead, I drive

0:16:39 > 0:16:42To a village hall somewhere off the M25

0:16:42 > 0:16:45And when I arrive I'm awaited with bated breath

0:16:45 > 0:16:47Alison's turning five

0:16:47 > 0:16:50And, yes, I dress up And, no, I don't wear the make-up

0:16:50 > 0:16:52But I do have massive shoes

0:16:52 > 0:16:55And, yes, I know the hokey cokey inside out

0:16:55 > 0:16:57And even though I know it's not really what it's all about

0:16:57 > 0:17:01For two hours on a Sunday For me it kind of is

0:17:01 > 0:17:04And for these kids It pretty much sums up what life is

0:17:04 > 0:17:08And if you listen to the words, it really should be what life's about

0:17:08 > 0:17:12You have to put your whole self in in life to get your whole self out

0:17:12 > 0:17:15Do you... LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

0:17:15 > 0:17:18Do you put your whole self in, Simon? Because I do

0:17:18 > 0:17:20And when I do, I shake it all about!

0:17:20 > 0:17:23CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:17:23 > 0:17:26And, yes, you correctly assume That I make balloons

0:17:26 > 0:17:28But not just any balloons

0:17:28 > 0:17:31I can make a bike out of balloons

0:17:31 > 0:17:34And for Alison, that is literally the best thing she could hope for

0:17:34 > 0:17:35And I make that happen

0:17:35 > 0:17:38I give a five-year-old the best thing she can imagine

0:17:38 > 0:17:41Before you've even had your breakfast

0:17:41 > 0:17:44I can sing all the words to # I like to move it, move it #

0:17:44 > 0:17:47And if that's not a skill Well, I'd like to see you do it

0:17:47 > 0:17:51I can dance to Gangnam Style I can make a crying toddler smile

0:17:51 > 0:17:55I can keep 40 kids completely silent...

0:17:55 > 0:17:56If only for a while

0:17:56 > 0:17:58And, yes, I have a degree

0:17:58 > 0:18:01But I've also got conga lines and magic on my CV

0:18:01 > 0:18:03And, yeah, I know nothing about IT

0:18:03 > 0:18:05But I am fully qualified in puppetry

0:18:05 > 0:18:08I can limbo dance and disco dance

0:18:08 > 0:18:10And I can do the cancan dance

0:18:10 > 0:18:11Dressed as a princess

0:18:11 > 0:18:13For four minutes straight

0:18:13 > 0:18:15Whilst blowing bubbles and simultaneously making sure

0:18:15 > 0:18:19That none of the kids touch my stuff or steal my stuff or break my stuff

0:18:19 > 0:18:21Or kick me or each other

0:18:22 > 0:18:24In other words, I can multitask And before you ask

0:18:24 > 0:18:28Yes, I can make water disappear And just to be clear

0:18:28 > 0:18:30I love my job

0:18:30 > 0:18:32I mean, I get to play on a daily basis

0:18:32 > 0:18:34And judging by the look on the children's faces

0:18:34 > 0:18:36I'm pretty damn good at it

0:18:36 > 0:18:39And it's that look that makes me want to do it

0:18:39 > 0:18:42That "happy and you know it and you really want to show it" reaction

0:18:42 > 0:18:44I mean, talk about bloody job satisfaction!

0:18:47 > 0:18:49But I don't say any of that

0:18:49 > 0:18:51I never do!

0:18:51 > 0:18:55I normally just look at the ground and nod

0:18:55 > 0:18:56And mumble...

0:18:56 > 0:18:58"Yeah.

0:18:58 > 0:19:00"Yeah, I'm just a clown."

0:19:00 > 0:19:01Thank you!

0:19:01 > 0:19:03LOUD CHEERING

0:19:10 > 0:19:13Kevin didn't tell you this part,

0:19:13 > 0:19:18but she is currently ranked the third-best poet in the world.

0:19:18 > 0:19:20- AUDIENCE: Whoo! - Yeah!

0:19:20 > 0:19:21That's pretty cool.

0:19:21 > 0:19:25So, we have seven poets competing for tonight's title.

0:19:25 > 0:19:28I am going to give you an introduction to each of them...

0:19:28 > 0:19:29which they wrote.

0:19:29 > 0:19:32They probably don't want me to have told you that part!

0:19:32 > 0:19:37They are going to come on in this order, and this is the last time

0:19:37 > 0:19:40we are going to tell you their order, so pay attention to these names.

0:19:40 > 0:19:45First up is Kevin McLean. He is a member and organiser of Loud Poets.

0:19:45 > 0:19:49He won the Edinburgh Lit Soc Slam, the Soapbox Lightning Slam,

0:19:49 > 0:19:54Lach's Superhoot and competed in the Scottish National Slam Championship.

0:19:54 > 0:19:57We asked them to write one sentence about themselves.

0:19:57 > 0:19:59Kevin McLean is one of the Loud Poets,

0:19:59 > 0:20:02though his loudness can also be witnessed

0:20:02 > 0:20:04in these following areas of his life -

0:20:04 > 0:20:06the pre-dawn ritual sacrifice,

0:20:06 > 0:20:08the moments following a Prada reveal

0:20:08 > 0:20:12and "right now, look, he's behind you."

0:20:12 > 0:20:14Next up will be Charlie Dupree.

0:20:14 > 0:20:16Charlie is a spoken word and rap artist

0:20:16 > 0:20:18known for combining literary influences

0:20:18 > 0:20:21with a rhythmic characterised delivery

0:20:21 > 0:20:24described by Annexe magazine as "a unique brand of poetic wizardry".

0:20:24 > 0:20:27On the spoken word circuit and festivals such as Latitude,

0:20:27 > 0:20:31Secret Garden Party, Soundwave and Troyfest,

0:20:31 > 0:20:34he's supported Scroobius Pip, Ghostpoet, Kate Tempest,

0:20:34 > 0:20:35is a multiple slam winner

0:20:35 > 0:20:39and three-time Hammer & Tongue national finalist.

0:20:39 > 0:20:43His sentence is a pulsing concoction of literary influences

0:20:43 > 0:20:45and kinetic verbal onslaughts.

0:20:45 > 0:20:48I don't know what half those words mean. That's fantastic.

0:20:48 > 0:20:52Kirsten Luckins is the Northeast programme coordinator for spoken word

0:20:52 > 0:20:55organisation Apples and Snakes, she is a performer and poet in her right,

0:20:55 > 0:20:59often looking at themes of spiritual, sexual and emotional identity.

0:20:59 > 0:21:02She blogs at kirstenluckins.wordpress.com

0:21:02 > 0:21:04and unfortunately you've missed it,

0:21:04 > 0:21:08but she did an amazing show called The Moon Cannot Be Stolen,

0:21:08 > 0:21:10it was on a national tour, it will probably go on another one,

0:21:10 > 0:21:12look out for it, it's wicked.

0:21:12 > 0:21:14David Lee Morgan has travelled the world

0:21:14 > 0:21:17with his saxophone as a performance poet and street musician.

0:21:17 > 0:21:22He has won many poetry slams, including the UK SLAM! Championships.

0:21:22 > 0:21:26His 2013 spoken word show Science, Love And Revolution received

0:21:26 > 0:21:29rave reviews at the Edinburgh Fringe and was featured at StAnza.

0:21:29 > 0:21:32He is a long-standing member of the Writers' Guild,

0:21:32 > 0:21:36has a PhD in creative writing, lives in in London, grew up in the USA,

0:21:36 > 0:21:39was born in Berlin and has been published

0:21:39 > 0:21:41in really a very long list of places.

0:21:41 > 0:21:45Toby Campion was part of Georgetown University's Poetry Slam Team,

0:21:45 > 0:21:49which competed in the national American slam.

0:21:49 > 0:21:53He came back to the UK, he set up a slam team at Edinburgh University

0:21:53 > 0:21:56and they won the British University national slam championships!

0:21:56 > 0:21:59That's kind of cool. Go, Toby.

0:21:59 > 0:22:02Toby Campion is an exciting, up-and-coming spoken word artist

0:22:02 > 0:22:05from Leicester, currently based in Edinburgh.

0:22:05 > 0:22:08Agnes Torok is a spoken word poet, workshop leader,

0:22:08 > 0:22:10event organiser and human.

0:22:10 > 0:22:12She is part of running Open Mic Soapbox,

0:22:12 > 0:22:15events collective Inky Fingers and Loud Poets.

0:22:15 > 0:22:17She has won slams in two languages

0:22:17 > 0:22:21and been a sacrificial poet on three continents.

0:22:21 > 0:22:22That's pretty cool.

0:22:22 > 0:22:25She did an amazing show called Sorry I Don't Speak Culture,

0:22:25 > 0:22:27which has also closed,

0:22:27 > 0:22:31but was the talk of every single poet on the Fringe, so watch out for her.

0:22:31 > 0:22:34Agnes spits and slams in two languages

0:22:34 > 0:22:36about life, hope and political ignorance.

0:22:36 > 0:22:39Sometimes, if you're lucky, she's even funny.

0:22:39 > 0:22:43Our last poet up tonight is Amanda Baker.

0:22:43 > 0:22:45Five proudest poetry moments in reverse order.

0:22:45 > 0:22:49Five - delivering a set despite falling on my face on stage

0:22:49 > 0:22:51at the Playhouse Theatre, Newcastle.

0:22:51 > 0:22:54Four - Richard Madeley chortling at my Royal Wedding poem on radio

0:22:54 > 0:22:57then chickening out of reading it.

0:22:57 > 0:22:59Three - being short listed in the 2011

0:22:59 > 0:23:02Bridport International Poetry Prize with a poem about grief.

0:23:02 > 0:23:05Two - deciding after my second experience of slamming

0:23:05 > 0:23:09never, ever to do another slam EVER, EVER, EVER.

0:23:09 > 0:23:12Um, Amanda? LAUGHTER

0:23:12 > 0:23:13One - winning a big orange

0:23:13 > 0:23:16and yellow satin rosette for a poem in a birthday card

0:23:16 > 0:23:20I made for Beatrix Potter at my local library when I was six.

0:23:20 > 0:23:22AUDIENCE: Aww!

0:23:22 > 0:23:25Amanda Baker, laughmaker, syntax shaker, word whittler,

0:23:25 > 0:23:28tonsil tickler, author, blogger, poet.

0:23:28 > 0:23:31First up to the stage, kicking off the slam,

0:23:31 > 0:23:34please put your hands together - Kevin McLean.

0:23:34 > 0:23:36CHEERING

0:23:47 > 0:23:51Once she said I was precious to her like a diamond

0:23:51 > 0:23:53Never realising that I would rather be

0:23:53 > 0:23:54The rough stuff you find them in

0:23:54 > 0:23:56And I know she meant it as a compliment

0:23:56 > 0:23:59But how do you compare a spec of glitter

0:23:59 > 0:24:01To the substance of a continent?

0:24:01 > 0:24:04Honestly, diamonds are fucking stupid

0:24:04 > 0:24:05LAUGHTER

0:24:05 > 0:24:09"Hey, sweetheart, I got you this ring to prove what my love is worth

0:24:09 > 0:24:12"All I had to do was rip open the earth and enslave a whole race

0:24:12 > 0:24:16"And their children, and their children, and their children...

0:24:16 > 0:24:18"Will you marry me?"

0:24:19 > 0:24:22Well, that's not the kind of shiny that I want to be

0:24:22 > 0:24:25She said, "OK, then you're the best thing since sliced bread"

0:24:25 > 0:24:29I told her, "If I was a loaf, I'd be 100% crust

0:24:29 > 0:24:31"The part that nourishes us No pre-sliced white fluff

0:24:31 > 0:24:34"I would be uneven and filled with seeds

0:24:34 > 0:24:37"And you would have to cut into me to see what treasures I bleed"

0:24:37 > 0:24:40So she went for something simpler

0:24:40 > 0:24:44She said, "I love the way your hand fits perfectly in mine", and, er...

0:24:44 > 0:24:47I didn't believe her. LAUGHTER

0:24:47 > 0:24:49And it's not that I don't appreciate it a lot

0:24:49 > 0:24:50It's that my stomach churns

0:24:50 > 0:24:52At the thought of accepting a compliment so grand

0:24:52 > 0:24:54While remaining so self-conscious

0:24:54 > 0:24:57About my size, my hair, my misshapen hand

0:24:57 > 0:24:59And maybe that's why sometimes I lack

0:24:59 > 0:25:03And the compliments that I choose to give back, see...

0:25:03 > 0:25:06She never felt at ease when I would play her ribs like piano keys

0:25:06 > 0:25:11She would beg me "Please, stop...I'm too thin"

0:25:11 > 0:25:14Couldn't see that all I ever wanted was for her to sing along

0:25:14 > 0:25:16Couldn't see that when I kissed the scars on her wrist

0:25:16 > 0:25:17I was saying, "You're strong"

0:25:17 > 0:25:20Because I understand that the war waged against oneself

0:25:20 > 0:25:21Is the hardest one to fight

0:25:21 > 0:25:24And so somewhere along the line I guess we both just lost sight

0:25:24 > 0:25:27Of what the other was trying to say Which in its simplest terms is

0:25:27 > 0:25:30"YOU...are pretty great"

0:25:31 > 0:25:35So the next time someone I love tells me I'm their needle in the hay

0:25:35 > 0:25:38I will try and feel less like I'm under attack

0:25:38 > 0:25:42I'll try and see that while everyone else is wearing gold

0:25:42 > 0:25:45Sometimes it's silver that stands out in the stack.

0:25:45 > 0:25:48CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:26:10 > 0:26:11Things

0:26:13 > 0:26:15Everywhere I look, I see things

0:26:15 > 0:26:19Things, things, things encircle my body like a big stack of rings

0:26:19 > 0:26:21But what are things?

0:26:21 > 0:26:23The things that we sense or something else?

0:26:23 > 0:26:26Are the things really things for the things themselves?

0:26:26 > 0:26:29Or are they just things for us? Do we make the things things

0:26:29 > 0:26:32By giving them their thingness? Are they just ours

0:26:32 > 0:26:36Or can they be their own? Do the toys stay alive when you leave the room?

0:26:41 > 0:26:42Stuff...

0:26:42 > 0:26:44LAUGHTER

0:26:44 > 0:26:46Everywhere I look, I see stuff

0:26:46 > 0:26:49Stuff, stuff, stuff, am I swimming in an ocean of subatomic dust?

0:26:49 > 0:26:51Both time and space have a liquidy feel

0:26:51 > 0:26:54They're not as solid as they wish they were

0:26:54 > 0:26:56But getting back to stuff

0:26:56 > 0:26:58Now, most of the stuff we have our own words for

0:26:58 > 0:27:01But do they really relate to the stuff that they serve for?

0:27:01 > 0:27:03Or are they just sounds?

0:27:03 > 0:27:05Sounds that distinguish stuff on the grounds

0:27:05 > 0:27:08That their English invention is for the intention to use to apply

0:27:08 > 0:27:10To particular sections of stuff

0:27:12 > 0:27:16But maybe language isn't enough to encompass what it means to be stuff

0:27:18 > 0:27:20So things and stuff, things and stuff

0:27:20 > 0:27:22Things in themselves become stuff for us

0:27:22 > 0:27:24Ordered, arranged into causal space

0:27:24 > 0:27:26As the flow of time forth when the thoughts give pace

0:27:26 > 0:27:28So you're not to me now what you seemed to me then

0:27:28 > 0:27:31Everything you are is rescreened in my head

0:27:31 > 0:27:33Memories disagree when you meet up with friends

0:27:33 > 0:27:36Cos the details run free in the bleed of your sense

0:27:36 > 0:27:38The cup's half full on one day, half empty the next

0:27:38 > 0:27:41It's the jester perception infecting its guests

0:27:43 > 0:27:45Cos words and things have separate lives

0:27:45 > 0:27:47Have separate potential hidden inside

0:27:47 > 0:27:50But I don't mind as long as every day I can bathe in the stuff

0:27:50 > 0:27:53Swim in the things, wallow in the beauty of my surroundings

0:27:53 > 0:27:57Paddle in the atoms of this totality of things and stuff

0:27:57 > 0:27:59That make up this reality

0:27:59 > 0:28:01But there's so much stuff

0:28:01 > 0:28:03In my lifetime I can try as I might

0:28:03 > 0:28:05But I won't have a hope of grasping the full scope of this

0:28:05 > 0:28:07Awfully enormous exorbitant border

0:28:07 > 0:28:09This raucously orderless ocean of stuff

0:28:09 > 0:28:11And the same thing goes for every single one of us

0:28:11 > 0:28:14We rush through our days in a haze of lust

0:28:14 > 0:28:17But eventually, like diamonds We are cut with our own dust

0:28:17 > 0:28:20Cos the human brain can't comprehend much

0:28:20 > 0:28:23And everything it does is usually contentious

0:28:23 > 0:28:27I'm just being charmingly observant, not pretentious

0:28:27 > 0:28:29I can wax lyrically about the mystery

0:28:29 > 0:28:31Far more things than are dreamt of in philosophy

0:28:31 > 0:28:32See what you can, see what you got

0:28:32 > 0:28:34With big black cloak draped over the top

0:28:34 > 0:28:37Short for the truth, short for the real

0:28:37 > 0:28:39Short for the juice behind the peel

0:28:39 > 0:28:41Short for what's born inside your mind

0:28:41 > 0:28:43Short for the whips and scorns of time

0:28:45 > 0:28:47So I'll draw a line there

0:28:47 > 0:28:49You've probably had enough

0:28:49 > 0:28:53That is my ode to things and stuff.

0:28:53 > 0:28:55CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:29:04 > 0:29:06AUDIENCE: Whoo!

0:29:17 > 0:29:19When it's getting...

0:29:19 > 0:29:22Getting, getting, getting

0:29:22 > 0:29:25Getting-ting-ting-ting-ting-ting- ting-ting-ting

0:29:25 > 0:29:27Getting on for June

0:29:27 > 0:29:30It will be monsoon, soon

0:29:30 > 0:29:35When the rain - thin, pin rain

0:29:35 > 0:29:38Rain - slap, drop rain

0:29:38 > 0:29:41Fat, green bean rain

0:29:41 > 0:29:43Double time, ring-ting rain

0:29:43 > 0:29:45Rain tings, tin court

0:29:45 > 0:29:47Slap-bang, pan court

0:29:47 > 0:29:50Pantiles, sing songs

0:29:50 > 0:29:52Terracotta pan-pan-pan

0:29:54 > 0:29:56Stay on when the rains come

0:29:56 > 0:29:57There's not a lot to do

0:29:57 > 0:30:00Just talk a little tittle-tattle Listen to the palm tips rattle

0:30:00 > 0:30:03And the dripping and the dropping And the drumming on the leaves

0:30:03 > 0:30:07And the flowers For hours and hours and hours

0:30:07 > 0:30:11Bougainvillea, pink... Pink, pink, pink, pink, pink, pink

0:30:11 > 0:30:14And the rain - thin, pin rain

0:30:14 > 0:30:17Rain - slap, drop rain

0:30:17 > 0:30:19Fat, green bean rain

0:30:19 > 0:30:21Double time, ring-ting rain

0:30:21 > 0:30:22Rain tings, tin court

0:30:22 > 0:30:24Slap-bang, pan court

0:30:24 > 0:30:26Pantiles, sing songs

0:30:26 > 0:30:29Terracotta pan Terracotta pan-pan-pan

0:30:30 > 0:30:32Stay on when the rains come

0:30:32 > 0:30:34The beaches are deserted -

0:30:34 > 0:30:37Candolim, Calangute, Baga

0:30:37 > 0:30:39Baga-baga-baga-baga-bag

0:30:39 > 0:30:42Backpackers packed up, shooting through

0:30:42 > 0:30:45Bombay butterflies gone back to Juhu

0:30:45 > 0:30:48On the catamaran, the catamaran, the catamaran, the catamaran

0:30:48 > 0:30:50And the rain - thin, pin rain

0:30:50 > 0:30:52Rain - slap, drop rain

0:30:52 > 0:30:54Fat, green bean rain

0:30:54 > 0:30:57Double time, ring-ting, rain-rain tings

0:30:57 > 0:30:58Thunder...

0:30:58 > 0:31:01LAUGHTER

0:31:01 > 0:31:03Tin court Slap-bang, pan court

0:31:03 > 0:31:05Pantiles, sing songs

0:31:05 > 0:31:08Terracotta pan, terracotta pan Terracotta pan-pan-pan

0:31:08 > 0:31:11Cos when the rains come down

0:31:11 > 0:31:14The rains come down in a rush

0:31:14 > 0:31:16In a rush, drops are dripping, drips are dropping

0:31:16 > 0:31:19From the drooping tips of palms On the paddies and the brollies

0:31:19 > 0:31:21Of the people on the mopeds On the heads of the cattle

0:31:21 > 0:31:23Like steam from a kettle Rain comes down

0:31:23 > 0:31:25In a rush, in a crush

0:31:25 > 0:31:29On the terracotta pan-pan-pan-pan-pan-pantiles

0:31:29 > 0:31:32Of the veranda, the veranda, the veranda, the veranda

0:31:32 > 0:31:35The veranda, the ve-randa, the ve-ran-da

0:31:35 > 0:31:37The ve-ran...

0:31:40 > 0:31:41..da.

0:31:41 > 0:31:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:32:01 > 0:32:07The Congo Free State 1885 to 1908

0:32:09 > 0:32:14We are the hands that hold nothing We are the hands strung on a string

0:32:14 > 0:32:16We are the hands counted in bullets

0:32:16 > 0:32:18Body and bloodless bone and skin

0:32:18 > 0:32:20We are the hands...

0:32:22 > 0:32:26It's not cruelty, it's logic, simple logic

0:32:26 > 0:32:29Guns do not kill people, bullets kill people

0:32:29 > 0:32:32We give you bullets for killing Africans

0:32:32 > 0:32:34Not white people

0:32:34 > 0:32:35So here's the deal

0:32:35 > 0:32:38You fire a bullet You give me a hand

0:32:38 > 0:32:41You hit the target You cut off a hand

0:32:41 > 0:32:45You fire and miss You cut off a hand

0:32:45 > 0:32:49Any hand, so long as it's African

0:32:50 > 0:32:52This is how the rubber is harvested

0:32:52 > 0:32:54You take a knife and cut into the bark

0:32:54 > 0:32:56Cut into the limb and the tree weeps

0:32:56 > 0:32:58Cut into the root and it drowns in tears

0:32:58 > 0:33:01You smear the tears onto your body

0:33:01 > 0:33:04The tears dry into a second skin

0:33:04 > 0:33:07When we rip skin from skin

0:33:07 > 0:33:08You howl in agony

0:33:09 > 0:33:11It's not cruelty, it's accounting

0:33:11 > 0:33:14There were too many bullets and never enough hands

0:33:14 > 0:33:16So they became valuable

0:33:16 > 0:33:19And one severed hand is pretty much like any other

0:33:19 > 0:33:21So they became exchangeable

0:33:21 > 0:33:24They functioned as currency

0:33:24 > 0:33:27In other words, hands were money

0:33:27 > 0:33:29Slavery, ivory, rubber and gold

0:33:29 > 0:33:31Look at the photos from the days of old

0:33:31 > 0:33:33When the Congo was owned by Leopold

0:33:33 > 0:33:35Look at the villagers lined up in rows

0:33:35 > 0:33:37Look at the stump at the end of the wrist

0:33:37 > 0:33:40Nothing but air where the blade has kissed

0:33:40 > 0:33:42Not even girls and boys were missed

0:33:42 > 0:33:47Cold hand, tantalum, tungsten, tin I am the plague the wind blew in

0:33:48 > 0:33:50The warrior leaders and the warrior peoples

0:33:50 > 0:33:53Mulamba, Kandolo, Yamba Yamba

0:33:53 > 0:33:55Kimpuki, Nzansu, Mulume Niama

0:33:55 > 0:33:57The Boa and the Budja The Yaka and the Chokwe

0:33:57 > 0:34:00The Sanga in the caves of Tshamakele

0:34:02 > 0:34:04We blocked up the last cave and starved you for months

0:34:04 > 0:34:06But you never gave up

0:34:06 > 0:34:10We set fire to the mouth of the cave Still, you wouldn't surrender

0:34:10 > 0:34:12You never surrendered So what?

0:34:12 > 0:34:15I am the hand that grows back

0:34:15 > 0:34:17Fist, fingers blossoming around your throat

0:34:17 > 0:34:20Blood money coursing through my veins

0:34:20 > 0:34:23I am the steamboat and the banknote The machine gun and the hedge fund

0:34:23 > 0:34:26I am the World Wide Web of profit and loss, supply and demand

0:34:26 > 0:34:29If you want me dead Don't cut off my hand

0:34:29 > 0:34:31Cut off my head.

0:34:33 > 0:34:38We are the hands that hold nothing We are the hands strung on a string

0:34:38 > 0:34:40We are the hands counted in bullets

0:34:40 > 0:34:43Body and bloodless, bone and skin

0:34:43 > 0:34:44We are the hands

0:34:44 > 0:34:47We have no teeth, no mouth, no tongue, but we speak truth

0:34:47 > 0:34:50We are the bulletproof.

0:34:52 > 0:34:55CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:35:14 > 0:35:17This poem is a true story about me,

0:35:17 > 0:35:19that I actually wrote when I was a baby.

0:35:20 > 0:35:24I don't know if you know, but in England you only have 42 days

0:35:24 > 0:35:27to name your baby before the state assigns it one.

0:35:27 > 0:35:31I'm 41 days old, still anonymous, and I'm not happy about it.

0:35:31 > 0:35:33Sitting in my crib

0:35:33 > 0:35:35I'm a glass bottle

0:35:35 > 0:35:38Parents throw names at me like ring-toss at the fair

0:35:38 > 0:35:39But none stick

0:35:39 > 0:35:41Do they blame me?

0:35:41 > 0:35:42Hate me?

0:35:42 > 0:35:44I know that they're angry

0:35:44 > 0:35:46They keep getting in my face making babbling noises

0:35:46 > 0:35:49And I'm like, "Back off or I'll pooh again."

0:35:50 > 0:35:54We've been through the Biblical stage, the Noahs and the Peters

0:35:54 > 0:35:58Through the international phase, Pierre, Pedro and Demetrius

0:35:58 > 0:36:02Made it through the terrifying time where Ambrose was on the table

0:36:04 > 0:36:06Apparently I'm too bouncy for a David

0:36:06 > 0:36:08Too quite for a Daryl

0:36:08 > 0:36:09I've too much hair for a Henry

0:36:09 > 0:36:11And too much penis for a Carol

0:36:13 > 0:36:14I'm too blond for a Jamie

0:36:14 > 0:36:16Too grumpy for a Stan

0:36:16 > 0:36:18And according to my Uncle Mikey

0:36:18 > 0:36:20I'm too chubby to be a Dan

0:36:21 > 0:36:23Not looking so skinny yourself, Michael

0:36:23 > 0:36:25How's the second divorce going?

0:36:28 > 0:36:30Are my features so obscene

0:36:30 > 0:36:33That no combination of letters will rest easy upon them?

0:36:33 > 0:36:36They named my sister quickly enough - Maxine

0:36:36 > 0:36:38Little did they know in four years' time

0:36:38 > 0:36:41Eminem will write a song about a prostitute crack-fiend

0:36:41 > 0:36:43Called Maxine, who needs a vaccine

0:36:43 > 0:36:44So joke's on you, Mum and Dad.

0:36:44 > 0:36:47LAUGHTER

0:36:47 > 0:36:50Am I destined to remain a nameless bottle for ever?

0:36:50 > 0:36:54Will letters on the side of Starbucks cups and Coke cans

0:36:54 > 0:36:58Never convince me that companies actually care about who I am?

0:36:58 > 0:37:00Will there ever come a day when I walk down the street

0:37:00 > 0:37:04And people think, "Yeah, he's got a name"?

0:37:08 > 0:37:10I suppose that day is nearly upon me

0:37:10 > 0:37:12Tomorrow a man in a grey suit behind a desk

0:37:12 > 0:37:16Will call me something like "Stapler" or "Semi-colon"

0:37:17 > 0:37:19But until then, I sit here

0:37:19 > 0:37:21A glass bottle in a crib

0:37:21 > 0:37:23No label to gender me

0:37:23 > 0:37:25To dictate my characteristics

0:37:25 > 0:37:29To be my success or downfall in this moment

0:37:29 > 0:37:31I can be whatever I want to be

0:37:31 > 0:37:34So maybe I don't want a name after all.

0:37:34 > 0:37:36Or maybe they'll call me Toby at the last minute

0:37:36 > 0:37:39and for the rest of my life will make "Toby or not Toby" jokes

0:37:39 > 0:37:42Or tell me I share a name with their pet dog

0:37:42 > 0:37:45Either way, I will smile and take it

0:37:45 > 0:37:46Because the bottom line is

0:37:46 > 0:37:48I'm not too chubby to be a Dan

0:37:48 > 0:37:50A name is whatever you make it.

0:37:50 > 0:37:51Thank you.

0:37:51 > 0:37:53CHEERING

0:38:04 > 0:38:07The old ladies in the hospital

0:38:07 > 0:38:10They've got it all figured out

0:38:10 > 0:38:13They crown you family when you were a stranger only a minute ago

0:38:13 > 0:38:16And they talk about everything

0:38:16 > 0:38:18All the good stuff

0:38:18 > 0:38:21Like how nice the nurses are for bringing extra toast at night

0:38:21 > 0:38:24And whose grandchild is meant to come for visiting hour today.

0:38:25 > 0:38:28They joke about everything

0:38:28 > 0:38:31"Why, I don't know what I ever did to that man Parkinson

0:38:31 > 0:38:34"To have him give me his disease!"

0:38:34 > 0:38:37Nothing is serious enough to take serious

0:38:37 > 0:38:38When death may be at the door

0:38:38 > 0:38:41These beds have been rolled around more than once before

0:38:41 > 0:38:43And I don't know who left, or through what door

0:38:43 > 0:38:44For me to earn a place

0:38:44 > 0:38:48But I know I no longer need to earn it

0:38:48 > 0:38:52Because the old ladies in the hospital have got it all figured out.

0:38:53 > 0:38:55When things get rough

0:38:55 > 0:38:57You talk about the worries and the scaries

0:38:57 > 0:38:59And you get through them

0:38:59 > 0:39:05One compliment, one smile and, yeah, one cup of tea at a time.

0:39:05 > 0:39:08Ain't no each man to himself here

0:39:08 > 0:39:10Ain't no survival of the fittest here

0:39:10 > 0:39:13It's the survival of those most able to co-operate

0:39:13 > 0:39:17The survival of those most able to care for more than themselves

0:39:17 > 0:39:21It's the survival of us, collectively

0:39:21 > 0:39:24What does it matter if I get better if you get worse?

0:39:24 > 0:39:28How could I be winning if we are losing?

0:39:28 > 0:39:30So it is with society

0:39:30 > 0:39:33And so it is with ward 210

0:39:33 > 0:39:37Because the old ladies in the hospital have got it all figured out.

0:39:38 > 0:39:41When things get real rough

0:39:41 > 0:39:45I mean, when things get real rough

0:39:45 > 0:39:47When Jessie struggles to reach her straw

0:39:47 > 0:39:49Only to get it stuck so far down her throat

0:39:49 > 0:39:50She starts suffocating

0:39:50 > 0:39:53And Nancy is too far away from her walker to reach her in time

0:39:53 > 0:39:56And the rest of us have too many things hooked into our bloodstreams

0:39:56 > 0:39:59To move when things get real rough.

0:40:01 > 0:40:03You call for help.

0:40:03 > 0:40:05Capital H.

0:40:05 > 0:40:08But when helps come and helps help

0:40:08 > 0:40:11You ask how help's doing today

0:40:11 > 0:40:13Because no-one's life is easy.

0:40:13 > 0:40:16Did help get some rest after her shift last night?

0:40:16 > 0:40:19Has her youngest stopped crying from the toothache?

0:40:19 > 0:40:20You listen to help too

0:40:20 > 0:40:24Because we are all in this together

0:40:24 > 0:40:29And the old ladies in the hospital have it all figured out

0:40:29 > 0:40:31Because they are fearless in the face of fear

0:40:31 > 0:40:35Because they will literally hang their laundry out in public

0:40:35 > 0:40:38And flash each other by opening their gowns, daily

0:40:38 > 0:40:42Before they will feel shameful in the face of shame

0:40:42 > 0:40:47Because they put their hearts and minds and scars out in the open

0:40:47 > 0:40:50You know you can trust them

0:40:50 > 0:40:52With your life.

0:40:52 > 0:40:54CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:41:08 > 0:41:10Hello, blue tent people.

0:41:10 > 0:41:16My first offering for you tonight is rampant consumerism.

0:41:16 > 0:41:20A while back, I was listening to a commercial radio station -

0:41:20 > 0:41:23accidentally, obviously!

0:41:23 > 0:41:26And an advertisement caught my attention

0:41:26 > 0:41:29and the first line of this advertisement became

0:41:29 > 0:41:34the opening of this poem which is called Aspirational Bathroom.

0:41:37 > 0:41:41All of us aspire to have the most beautiful bathroom we can afford

0:41:41 > 0:41:46If you want to be adored, get aboard, we'll get you credit-scored

0:41:46 > 0:41:49To get this orgasmic quality in your voice

0:41:49 > 0:41:52Simply make the right choice of dining room chairs

0:41:52 > 0:41:53Singles or pairs

0:41:53 > 0:41:56Want that sense of together?

0:41:56 > 0:41:58Buy them in leather

0:41:58 > 0:41:59Buy now, don't pay for years

0:41:59 > 0:42:02No financial fears we want you to have it

0:42:02 > 0:42:04We REALLY want you to have it

0:42:04 > 0:42:06We don't see how you can live without it

0:42:06 > 0:42:08Get it now.

0:42:08 > 0:42:13To show your success, you must posses somewhere expensive to sit

0:42:13 > 0:42:16Or your life will be shit

0:42:16 > 0:42:19So come and indulge on this upholstered bulge

0:42:19 > 0:42:21Here's a car that's sexy

0:42:21 > 0:42:24Will do much more than go A to B

0:42:24 > 0:42:28Empty highway, pretty house with a sweet, smiling spouse

0:42:28 > 0:42:30Kids called Emma and Zack

0:42:30 > 0:42:32Don't fight or puke in the back

0:42:32 > 0:42:33For those girls and boys

0:42:33 > 0:42:38Rooms full of toys made in sweatshops in Asia

0:42:38 > 0:42:43Or risk the inevitable possibility they'll want to euthanise ya.

0:42:43 > 0:42:45Then fly away to paradise

0:42:45 > 0:42:48Smiling locals are so nice

0:42:48 > 0:42:51Drink, servility and food?

0:42:51 > 0:42:53Enhance the exotic mood

0:42:53 > 0:42:58Because you deserve to have everything your heart may desire

0:42:58 > 0:43:03Let it be to the very best bathroom that you aspire.

0:43:03 > 0:43:05Thank you.

0:43:05 > 0:43:07APPLAUSE

0:43:15 > 0:43:17It's a lovely room, isn't it?

0:43:18 > 0:43:22Lovely, kind of cubist fireworks.

0:43:24 > 0:43:25Erm...

0:43:25 > 0:43:29OK, well, that is the first round,

0:43:29 > 0:43:32so what happens in the second round is the order is reversed

0:43:32 > 0:43:35and they all come on again. But first, we need to...

0:43:36 > 0:43:39I had a text from the god of poetry.

0:43:42 > 0:43:45And it said it wasn't appeased yet.

0:43:45 > 0:43:49So, we didn't really have anyone else we could sacrifice,

0:43:49 > 0:43:51so what we thought we'd do is

0:43:51 > 0:43:56bring on...the current BBC Slam champion.

0:43:56 > 0:43:59CHEERING

0:43:59 > 0:44:01So, welcome to the stage, Sophia Walker.

0:44:01 > 0:44:03CHEERING

0:44:11 > 0:44:17He says, "Faggots, man, took me a while to be OK with them

0:44:17 > 0:44:22"But lesbians, never had a problem with lesbians."

0:44:23 > 0:44:26If you ever address me directly

0:44:26 > 0:44:29Forget you think lesbians are sexy

0:44:29 > 0:44:32That you can somehow decide that dykes are fine

0:44:32 > 0:44:34While gay men vile

0:44:34 > 0:44:37Please, say what you mean

0:44:37 > 0:44:41If you hate gay men then you hate me

0:44:41 > 0:44:43So name me "faggot"

0:44:43 > 0:44:49Faggot, noun, bundle of twigs

0:44:49 > 0:44:56Faggot, noun, contemptuous term for a woman

0:44:56 > 0:45:01Faggot, noun, disparaging and offensive reference

0:45:01 > 0:45:03To a male homosexual

0:45:03 > 0:45:07You claim your words are just figurative

0:45:07 > 0:45:10That there's no linking hate to hate crime statistics

0:45:10 > 0:45:14But each time you say, "Faggot," others use that as excuse

0:45:14 > 0:45:17To bash faggots whilst standing up for your views.

0:45:19 > 0:45:22You say, "Faggot," like there's no consequence

0:45:22 > 0:45:25Like others aren't inspired by the ire you spit

0:45:25 > 0:45:31To us, stone wall isn't a convenient surface for violence

0:45:31 > 0:45:34You can't act like these attacks aren't actively happening.

0:45:36 > 0:45:40Faggot, noun, 15th century

0:45:40 > 0:45:42Bundle of twigs

0:45:42 > 0:45:48Specifically the sticks used to set fire to heretics

0:45:48 > 0:45:53Faggot, noun, 16th century

0:45:53 > 0:45:56Contemptuous term for a woman

0:45:56 > 0:45:58Inferring the twig definition

0:45:58 > 0:46:01This reference to women as something awkward

0:46:01 > 0:46:03That has to be carried

0:46:03 > 0:46:05Meaning baggage

0:46:05 > 0:46:07Meaning burden

0:46:07 > 0:46:09Meaning worthless.

0:46:09 > 0:46:14Faggot, noun, 20th century

0:46:14 > 0:46:17Offensive and disparaging reference to a male homosexual

0:46:17 > 0:46:20Which, to some, means "less than human"

0:46:20 > 0:46:25Means carte blanche excuses to get violent and abusive

0:46:25 > 0:46:30Keep the word faggot but mind how you use it

0:46:30 > 0:46:33Meaning changes through evolving uses

0:46:33 > 0:46:37What started as wood would grow through usage

0:46:37 > 0:46:40Twigs branched out to meanings abusive.

0:46:41 > 0:46:43We don't need to redefine

0:46:43 > 0:46:46Words don't stay rooted

0:46:46 > 0:46:50In time, we'll have re-sown the seeds of its usage

0:46:50 > 0:46:54In origin, faggot twigs were lit and burned to ground

0:46:54 > 0:46:57Then ashes turned the term to women

0:46:57 > 0:47:01Burdens unbundled, women whittled, new beginnings

0:47:01 > 0:47:05No longer worthless, the term yet again shifted

0:47:05 > 0:47:07Gay men came victim

0:47:07 > 0:47:12Love is fuel to flame when twigs turn matchstick wicked.

0:47:12 > 0:47:17But through history, these ashes have led to same vision

0:47:17 > 0:47:22Each time, revived, a fiercer Phoenix has risen.

0:47:22 > 0:47:24Thank you.

0:47:24 > 0:47:26CHEERING

0:47:35 > 0:47:37Thank you, Sophia.

0:47:37 > 0:47:41And now we're going to start the second round.

0:47:41 > 0:47:47So, in reverse order, which means first up, Amanda Baker.

0:47:47 > 0:47:51APPLAUSE

0:47:54 > 0:47:57You look familiar. I know you.

0:47:57 > 0:48:03OK, so second piece of observational, satirical, character-centred,

0:48:03 > 0:48:07issue-orientated, randomly-topical, neo-contemporary, pseudo-retro,

0:48:07 > 0:48:09variety-type, sketch-style, political-polemical,

0:48:09 > 0:48:13depression-inspired, stand-up-comedy-theatre,

0:48:13 > 0:48:16kind of, narrative, humorous, performance poetry for you.

0:48:17 > 0:48:21This piece is called African Journalist In Britain.

0:48:21 > 0:48:23People who were at the heats, I apologise,

0:48:23 > 0:48:26I did do this one earlier in the week, but it's quite relevant.

0:48:26 > 0:48:30As a nation, globally and historically,

0:48:30 > 0:48:32we're absolutely mad about sticking

0:48:32 > 0:48:34our noses into other people's business,

0:48:34 > 0:48:38so this is my take on what it would be like the other way around.

0:48:41 > 0:48:45I've come to Britain to study the natives of this land

0:48:45 > 0:48:46From what I heard in Africa

0:48:46 > 0:48:48Things were going grand

0:48:48 > 0:48:52But I found the children were sick with swollen, bloated bellies

0:48:52 > 0:48:55Suffering the syndrome ECSIFOT -

0:48:55 > 0:48:57Eating crap, sitting in front of tellies.

0:48:59 > 0:49:01I went to the town centre at night

0:49:01 > 0:49:03I was shocked at what I saw

0:49:03 > 0:49:06The people there were so sick

0:49:06 > 0:49:08They could only lie down on the floor

0:49:08 > 0:49:11This ailment made them vomit

0:49:11 > 0:49:13They could not speak or move

0:49:13 > 0:49:16Oxfam should start a charity here to help things improve

0:49:16 > 0:49:21And in a nation with a history proud and imperial

0:49:21 > 0:49:25The women could afford only dresses made of tiny pieces of material.

0:49:27 > 0:49:30Your Mr Clegg sold his principals

0:49:30 > 0:49:32Dragged them in the muck

0:49:32 > 0:49:35In my country too, politicians don't give a...

0:49:35 > 0:49:37Lot of consideration to the democratic process.

0:49:37 > 0:49:39LAUGHTER

0:49:39 > 0:49:41I will take this report back home

0:49:41 > 0:49:43Show it to the people of my land

0:49:43 > 0:49:46We will set up Help Britain scheme

0:49:46 > 0:49:47She seems to need a hand

0:49:47 > 0:49:50We will collect the things that are needed

0:49:50 > 0:49:52And drop them in parcels by air

0:49:52 > 0:49:54A bit of perspective, some humility

0:49:54 > 0:49:57Cos they don't seem to have their fair share.

0:49:57 > 0:49:59Thanks very much.

0:49:59 > 0:50:01CHEERING

0:50:16 > 0:50:19When did you realise?

0:50:19 > 0:50:21How did your parents take it?

0:50:21 > 0:50:26How did you know for sure you were straight?

0:50:27 > 0:50:30Did you have a lot of straight role models?

0:50:30 > 0:50:32Are all your friends straight too?

0:50:32 > 0:50:34And how can you be sure though

0:50:34 > 0:50:37If you've never had sex with, like, anyone of the same sex as you?

0:50:37 > 0:50:40How can you be sure though if you've only had sex with, like,

0:50:40 > 0:50:42A few people of the same sex as you?

0:50:42 > 0:50:45How can you be sure though if you've never had sex?

0:50:45 > 0:50:48Sorry, is this making you uncomfortable?

0:50:49 > 0:50:52I've heard that straight people never have sex. Is that true?

0:50:52 > 0:50:55I've heard that straight people have sex, like, all the time.

0:50:55 > 0:50:59Is that true? Doesn't it ever bother you that you'll be able to have kids?

0:50:59 > 0:51:02Like, even if you really don't want them?

0:51:03 > 0:51:06You might still have kids one day.

0:51:06 > 0:51:09Sorry, is this too personal?

0:51:09 > 0:51:11Would you say that there was, like,

0:51:11 > 0:51:13A particular trauma in your childhood

0:51:13 > 0:51:15That led to you being straight?

0:51:15 > 0:51:18Do you think that being straight is more of a nature or a nurture thing?

0:51:18 > 0:51:21Do you believe that being straight is a choice?

0:51:21 > 0:51:24Oh, my God, I've always wanted a straight best friend!

0:51:24 > 0:51:25We should totally hang out

0:51:25 > 0:51:28And do prescribed straight family activities next week.

0:51:28 > 0:51:31So, let's just get this straight though...

0:51:31 > 0:51:35If you have a partner of the opposite sex...

0:51:35 > 0:51:37Does that mean that you're straight?

0:51:37 > 0:51:39Or just straight-curious?

0:51:39 > 0:51:42Or is it like a phase thing?

0:51:42 > 0:51:48So, if you're straight, does that mean that you like to eat food?

0:51:48 > 0:51:51Occasionally listen to music?

0:51:51 > 0:51:54Have hobbies? Oh, my God, me too!

0:51:57 > 0:51:58So, if you're straight,

0:51:58 > 0:52:03Do you have to, you know, do you have to dress straight?

0:52:03 > 0:52:06If you're straight do you have to go on the straight parade?

0:52:06 > 0:52:09Is it true that bi-sexual women only make up with men

0:52:09 > 0:52:10To get women's attention?

0:52:10 > 0:52:15How does your being straight fit into your religious beliefs?

0:52:15 > 0:52:18Is it really hard to be both straight and white?

0:52:18 > 0:52:22Sorry. Is this offensive?

0:52:22 > 0:52:25I can tell straight jokes, right? I mean, I have a straight friend.

0:52:25 > 0:52:28I have this one totally cute straight friend.

0:52:28 > 0:52:30I should totally hook you guys up.

0:52:31 > 0:52:33Did you ever watch that one TV series?

0:52:33 > 0:52:36You know, that one about straight people?

0:52:36 > 0:52:40Do you know there's one other straight person that I know.

0:52:40 > 0:52:42Do you hate men?

0:52:42 > 0:52:44Do you hate women?

0:52:44 > 0:52:47Do you hate yourself?

0:52:48 > 0:52:55CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:53:14 > 0:53:19It's not a brainstorm. It's a mind map. Yeah?

0:53:19 > 0:53:22They're not trannies and benders They're gays and transgender

0:53:22 > 0:53:25Coloured people are now people of colour.

0:53:25 > 0:53:28So the feelings towards them and the problems they face

0:53:28 > 0:53:30Might no longer exist and have all been erased, right?

0:53:32 > 0:53:33I'm left sceptical

0:53:33 > 0:53:37Because while slums and favelas have magically transformed

0:53:37 > 0:53:38Into places of mass dwelling

0:53:38 > 0:53:42The perceptions of those in the towers above looking down

0:53:42 > 0:53:44Looking down haven't faltered.

0:53:44 > 0:53:46And what's more those inside

0:53:46 > 0:53:49Still denied, still deprived remain unaltered.

0:53:49 > 0:53:50Remain hungry.

0:53:50 > 0:53:52As their oppressors eat on in the extra time

0:53:52 > 0:53:55They've been bought away from the global spotlight

0:53:55 > 0:53:57While campaigners congratulate themselves

0:53:57 > 0:53:59On a false victory of change.

0:53:59 > 0:54:03A lexical distraction that pauses real action, nothing has changed.

0:54:03 > 0:54:06The spelling is different but the semantics remain

0:54:06 > 0:54:09Connotations cling on like mould on a wall

0:54:09 > 0:54:12While new phrasing and political correctness

0:54:12 > 0:54:13Whitewash over it all

0:54:13 > 0:54:16And the rule-makers and their mouthpieces stand by.

0:54:16 > 0:54:18Sleeves rolled up and toolkits out

0:54:18 > 0:54:20Ready to put decking over the Third World

0:54:20 > 0:54:23And cover riots with a trellis and reassurance

0:54:23 > 0:54:25So that all we're left with

0:54:25 > 0:54:27Is developing countries and urban disorders.

0:54:27 > 0:54:30And they'll slap on the varnish and change what's expected

0:54:30 > 0:54:34So this word lasts a while before hate corrosion infects it

0:54:34 > 0:54:36But for now, the paint is fresh

0:54:36 > 0:54:40And the wall has been whitened but the bricks are still rotten

0:54:40 > 0:54:43And I am still frightened We have missed the point.

0:54:43 > 0:54:45The point is, it's not what you build

0:54:45 > 0:54:47It's the feelings behind it

0:54:47 > 0:54:49Because you can dig up your roses and put down hydrangeas

0:54:49 > 0:54:51But they're in the same dirt

0:54:51 > 0:54:54And sooner or later the vines of opposition and the weeds of fear

0:54:54 > 0:54:57Will wrap their way round to give an all-too-familiar veneer.

0:54:57 > 0:55:02Committing racially motivated unprovoked, actual bodily harm

0:55:02 > 0:55:06On a man of ethnic minority heritage is still Paki-bashing.

0:55:06 > 0:55:09The boy who was a retard at birth, a spastic at three

0:55:09 > 0:55:12Handicapped in school, special needed in adolescence,

0:55:12 > 0:55:14Is today mentally disabled.

0:55:14 > 0:55:15Who knows what he'll be tomorrow

0:55:15 > 0:55:18But I bet someone will still laugh As he walks down the street

0:55:18 > 0:55:21At the twinge in his hand and drool on his cheek.

0:55:21 > 0:55:23He doesn't need another change of label

0:55:23 > 0:55:25We need a change of mind.

0:55:25 > 0:55:27For rule-makers to put down their paintbrush

0:55:27 > 0:55:29And stop the orthographic DIY.

0:55:29 > 0:55:32Stop hammering new words over the same old cracks

0:55:32 > 0:55:35Cos our dictionaries are bursting but we're still off track, yeah

0:55:35 > 0:55:37We don't use the N word

0:55:37 > 0:55:39Or the P word and for that we are better

0:55:39 > 0:55:42But the Q word and Z word We're running out of letters

0:55:42 > 0:55:46Instead of moving lips, start opening eyes and broadening minds

0:55:46 > 0:55:48Because they aren't changing minds

0:55:48 > 0:55:50Changing language like this is doomed for demise.

0:55:50 > 0:55:53I'm not saying our foundations haven't dramatically improved

0:55:53 > 0:55:56But there are still some blocks that have yet to be moved

0:55:56 > 0:56:00So if you want to make a change where semantics can't hide it

0:56:00 > 0:56:03Try fixing the problem Not the words that describe it.

0:56:03 > 0:56:05Thank you.

0:56:05 > 0:56:09CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:56:22 > 0:56:25Crazy Santas occupy the World.

0:56:25 > 0:56:30Imagine you were this cool old guy who loved children, truly and deeply

0:56:30 > 0:56:33Loved every beat of the way they stiff little tick-tock walk

0:56:33 > 0:56:36And the monkey talk and the roar of the buzz and the whisper

0:56:36 > 0:56:39The butterfly why of honey and wonder and thirsty hunger

0:56:39 > 0:56:42They give you their hand with everything in it

0:56:42 > 0:56:43And your heart lurches into...

0:56:43 > 0:56:46Give me a place to stand and I will move the universe

0:56:46 > 0:56:50Squeeze it down into the perfect toy to light the smile inside your eye.

0:56:50 > 0:56:52Would give you anything.

0:56:52 > 0:56:54Imagine this

0:56:54 > 0:56:58Multiplied by every newborn smile in a heartbreak world

0:56:58 > 0:57:01If you could be Santa for every boy and girl

0:57:01 > 0:57:04Imagine a magic workshop powered by twinkle of the eye drive

0:57:04 > 0:57:06Quantum indecision and reindeer jive

0:57:06 > 0:57:09Every elf in all 11 dimensions drugged and demented

0:57:09 > 0:57:11But working with manic precision

0:57:11 > 0:57:13A just-in-the-nick-of-time engine

0:57:13 > 0:57:15That's why they call you Saint Nick

0:57:15 > 0:57:17And in the back of the sleigh, a bag big enough

0:57:17 > 0:57:19To carry its weight in wishes. This is it.

0:57:19 > 0:57:22The delicious impossible minute when every child on the planet is given

0:57:22 > 0:57:27The one perfect gift that says, "This is your world and you belong in it."

0:57:27 > 0:57:30Imagine you could do this one wonderful thing.

0:57:30 > 0:57:33But for the rest of the year that was all you could do

0:57:33 > 0:57:35And the toys would go out and be used up and worn out and broken

0:57:35 > 0:57:37And that was good, the way it should be

0:57:37 > 0:57:39That was why you would build them.

0:57:39 > 0:57:42Toys were made to be broken, not children.

0:57:42 > 0:57:44But in the war-torn days of the in-between year

0:57:44 > 0:57:47The names would change but it was always King Herod's reign.

0:57:47 > 0:57:50And the soldiers would go from door to door with bloody swords

0:57:50 > 0:57:52While you all worked on through tears in horror

0:57:52 > 0:57:54Knowing you could never make it right

0:57:54 > 0:57:57No matter how magical that one perfect night.

0:57:57 > 0:57:59What would you do?

0:57:59 > 0:58:03Would you go on working when you could only give the one magic minute?

0:58:03 > 0:58:06Better than nothing and who could argue with arithmetic?

0:58:06 > 0:58:08Or would you go crazy with the weight of anger and grief?

0:58:08 > 0:58:10Would you feel responsible?

0:58:10 > 0:58:12Would you feel like a thief living a life so sweet

0:58:12 > 0:58:16Full of hard work done well when so many children were living in hell?

0:58:16 > 0:58:18Some people can't ever get enough

0:58:18 > 0:58:20Give them a minute and they want eternity

0:58:20 > 0:58:22The kind who can never be happy with even a scrap of cruelty

0:58:22 > 0:58:25They go crazy at the thought of one child dying a needless death

0:58:25 > 0:58:27They can't rest

0:58:27 > 0:58:29They got to be moving, making more than a difference

0:58:29 > 0:58:31Making everything different.

0:58:31 > 0:58:35These are the crazy Santas who never give up, crazy Santas, mad with love.

0:58:35 > 0:58:37Crazy Santas get up at the crack of dawn

0:58:37 > 0:58:40Work boots on, march out onto the field, into the street

0:58:40 > 0:58:43Get beat, fight back, get shot at, don't stop, live life hot-wired.

0:58:43 > 0:58:47Crazy Santas are dangerous But it's a dangerous world

0:58:47 > 0:58:49Some people can't help fighting back

0:58:49 > 0:58:51Whenever they see the weak attacked

0:58:51 > 0:58:54They live like champions in the Army of the never-had-a-chance.

0:58:54 > 0:58:57Some of them pick up the gun Some of them live like saints

0:58:57 > 0:58:59All of them are powered by love

0:58:59 > 0:59:00All of them make mistakes

0:59:00 > 0:59:04Some say we need more magic minutes That's the best we can do

0:59:04 > 0:59:07But I believe we need to reach out for eternity

0:59:07 > 0:59:10We need to be crazy Santas who never give up

0:59:10 > 0:59:13Crazy Santas, mad with love.

0:59:15 > 0:59:18CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

0:59:40 > 0:59:41Talking Myself Round.

0:59:42 > 0:59:48The sudden drop in the temperature of your attentions

0:59:48 > 0:59:52Has left me feeling stranded like a lizard.

0:59:52 > 0:59:54Caught out by nightfall.

0:59:54 > 0:59:56Frost hobbled. Frozen.

0:59:56 > 0:59:59Six diamond inches from safety.

1:00:02 > 1:00:06Six diamond inches, six million light years

1:00:06 > 1:00:09It's all the same when you're helpless.

1:00:09 > 1:00:13I must have come a long, cold way from my home if yours is the hand

1:00:13 > 1:00:17I wish would reach out and squeeze blood from my stony heart.

1:00:17 > 1:00:20If yours is the body heat

1:00:20 > 1:00:24The arcing sun in the radiant daydreams of my reptilian mind

1:00:24 > 1:00:27I find there are galactic wastes between us.

1:00:27 > 1:00:33I have launched my Voyager heart and it is an obsolete probe

1:00:33 > 1:00:35Lopsided and hairy with chaotic antennae

1:00:35 > 1:00:38Beeping out some futile code.

1:00:38 > 1:00:40Beep.

1:00:40 > 1:00:42Do you like me?

1:00:42 > 1:00:44Beep.

1:00:44 > 1:00:47Can you hear me?

1:00:47 > 1:00:49Beep.

1:00:49 > 1:00:50Are you still there?

1:00:51 > 1:00:53Beep.

1:00:55 > 1:01:00I'm turning cold flanks in the void. Solitary.

1:01:00 > 1:01:02I've missed your orbit entirely.

1:01:04 > 1:01:06Well... We're not suited anyway.

1:01:08 > 1:01:11We are completely different shapes, you and me

1:01:11 > 1:01:14I am a fractal kind of female My mess proliferates

1:01:14 > 1:01:16And you are so Euclidean

1:01:16 > 1:01:18So very, very straight You are a cube.

1:01:19 > 1:01:22You are a white cube.

1:01:22 > 1:01:26You are a...perfect white cube.

1:01:26 > 1:01:29Six sides neatly spackled

1:01:29 > 1:01:32And I am slum-built, 17-dimensional

1:01:32 > 1:01:35Ramshackle held together with bits of string

1:01:35 > 1:01:36But I have a theory

1:01:36 > 1:01:40I think the thing about white cube spaces is, you can't live in them

1:01:40 > 1:01:44And the thing about shantytowns is that people can and do live

1:01:44 > 1:01:47Cheek by jowl in a squalid Eden of sheds

1:01:47 > 1:01:51Survival ritual carnival Meat between our teeth.

1:01:51 > 1:01:54I think you think the world would be more beautiful if it was tidied up

1:01:54 > 1:01:56It's not a toy box

1:01:56 > 1:01:58It's poetry and puss

1:01:58 > 1:02:00Bacteria and butterflies

1:02:00 > 1:02:01Us killing them, them killing us

1:02:01 > 1:02:03It is everything.

1:02:03 > 1:02:06You go ask Shiva on the burning gats.

1:02:06 > 1:02:08He is grey-faced and greasy

1:02:08 > 1:02:12With cremation ash and rendered human fats

1:02:12 > 1:02:16Red eyed and rabid, he gnaws the holy flesh

1:02:16 > 1:02:18From the black bones of the world

1:02:18 > 1:02:23Untroubled by asymmetry or dust bunnies.

1:02:24 > 1:02:28He holds forever in his mind the entire river's course

1:02:28 > 1:02:31From the fetid, fecund mangroves of the delta

1:02:31 > 1:02:34Back to the crystal glacier source

1:02:34 > 1:02:36The mighty Ganges is just one dread

1:02:36 > 1:02:39In the big blue topknot on his big blue head.

1:02:40 > 1:02:42And we... BUZZER

1:02:42 > 1:02:44Aw.

1:02:44 > 1:02:48..are all just bodies of water. You and me, we are sacks of shit.

1:02:48 > 1:02:52Spindled around our walking guts We are miracles, we are profane.

1:02:52 > 1:02:54The birth cord sets us off like tops

1:02:54 > 1:02:58But when the force that spins us stops...

1:02:58 > 1:03:00Crash down, splashdown

1:03:00 > 1:03:02We are all just dirt again.

1:03:03 > 1:03:08CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:03:17 > 1:03:19Hey, guys. Right, so this next one is what happens

1:03:19 > 1:03:21if you read too much existentialism.

1:03:25 > 1:03:27I'm sitting on a train.

1:03:29 > 1:03:31The window is ablaze I'm feeling tickled by my day

1:03:31 > 1:03:34About which there has been little to complain.

1:03:35 > 1:03:38And I start...to chuckle.

1:03:39 > 1:03:41Nothing over the top

1:03:41 > 1:03:44No diaphragm expulsions

1:03:44 > 1:03:47Just a little titter shapes my face's happy muscles

1:03:47 > 1:03:50Elation laps and fumbles at my brain state's traffic bustle

1:03:50 > 1:03:54As I share a friendly giggle with myself for absent trouble.

1:03:56 > 1:03:58But then the planet plunges

1:03:58 > 1:04:02As I realise with abject disgust that...

1:04:02 > 1:04:05I'm being watched.

1:04:07 > 1:04:09Watched.

1:04:09 > 1:04:11Looked at. Observed.

1:04:11 > 1:04:15Two beady eyes toad-like in the puddingy countenance

1:04:15 > 1:04:17Of some crook, some turd, fixed on me

1:04:17 > 1:04:21His lips tensed in a wry derisory smirk.

1:04:21 > 1:04:24Instantaneously my eyes avert away from this tyke this jerk

1:04:24 > 1:04:27Who's just used one look to decry my mirth.

1:04:27 > 1:04:30I do all I can not to cry out berserk

1:04:30 > 1:04:33There's fire in my bones Every fibre is groaning.

1:04:33 > 1:04:36How dare he invade this most private of moments!

1:04:37 > 1:04:41I try to now focus on passing hill things, farms and buildings

1:04:41 > 1:04:45But I'm too painfully aware that this perverse little incident

1:04:45 > 1:04:48Has caused my whole cosy little world to disintegrate.

1:04:48 > 1:04:52His gaze has blown the pixels from my screen of pure bliss

1:04:52 > 1:04:55Now they've regrouped to run from me and flee towards him.

1:04:55 > 1:04:57He's torn through my contentment, my blessedness, my reverie

1:04:57 > 1:05:00His stare like a sword through my self-tended ecstasy

1:05:00 > 1:05:03He wrenches me away from my self where I'm meant to be

1:05:03 > 1:05:06As his object in the midst of his reverie.

1:05:09 > 1:05:12Now he drives every stride like a knight on his nag

1:05:12 > 1:05:16I find I with his eyes am in-flight from my am

1:05:16 > 1:05:18I can't be my version of me Now I'm his version of me

1:05:18 > 1:05:22I'm redrawn in his kagita He prefers me to be

1:05:22 > 1:05:24My meanness is chief rehashed in a blender

1:05:24 > 1:05:28I'm a play in his perceptions of my act, he's director.

1:05:28 > 1:05:30Recasts me in shapes Replanting my nature

1:05:30 > 1:05:33Hustles me on stage from the darkness of the wings

1:05:33 > 1:05:36His eyes multiply into 1,000 leering faces

1:05:36 > 1:05:40Descending on me from the gods as I realise I am in hell.

1:05:40 > 1:05:42The hell of other people

1:05:42 > 1:05:45And the various theatre of all that's truly evil!

1:05:47 > 1:05:50And then I realise that I've just thrown myself out of the window

1:05:51 > 1:05:53Of a moving train.

1:05:53 > 1:05:55Thank you very much.

1:05:55 > 1:06:00CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:06:19 > 1:06:21Good morning, good afternoon, good evening

1:06:21 > 1:06:23I guess it all depends how long you've been awake

1:06:23 > 1:06:25My watch calls it 36 minutes past the 42nd hour

1:06:25 > 1:06:29And I think I'm just about to get my second wind!

1:06:29 > 1:06:30Ha-ha-ha!

1:06:30 > 1:06:32HIS LAUGHTER DIES OUT

1:06:32 > 1:06:33Speaking of wind

1:06:33 > 1:06:35Did you know the windiest place in the world

1:06:35 > 1:06:36Is the George V Coast in Antarctica

1:06:36 > 1:06:37Where Wikipedia reliably informs me

1:06:37 > 1:06:40Winds can reach speeds of up to 350kph?

1:06:40 > 1:06:41This of course pales into insignificance when compared

1:06:41 > 1:06:43With the speed with which my brain will go off on a tangent

1:06:43 > 1:06:45Due to a lack of sleep

1:06:45 > 1:06:49I...AM...TIRED!

1:06:49 > 1:06:51But I cannot rest

1:06:51 > 1:06:54An adult human brain works best after eight hours of peaceful slumber

1:06:54 > 1:06:56If only my nightly diet of every TV show ever made

1:06:56 > 1:06:57And Tumblr had the same affect, but hey!

1:06:57 > 1:06:59We all love Dr Who/Sherlock crossover

1:06:59 > 1:07:01Get some passive-aggressive comments

1:07:01 > 1:07:02About getting more sleep from Netflix

1:07:02 > 1:07:05What...was I...talking about?

1:07:05 > 1:07:07LAUGHTER

1:07:07 > 1:07:08His brain has begun to phase in and out

1:07:08 > 1:07:10As he attempts to perform on stage

1:07:10 > 1:07:13His sleep-starved psyche tries frantically to remain focused

1:07:13 > 1:07:16On the task at hand, he mumbles a curse

1:07:16 > 1:07:18As he realises he's begun to narrate his own life

1:07:20 > 1:07:21Out loud

1:07:22 > 1:07:24In the third person

1:07:24 > 1:07:25LAUGHTER

1:07:25 > 1:07:27Damn

1:07:27 > 1:07:28I'm tired

1:07:28 > 1:07:29But I can't rest

1:07:29 > 1:07:31I was eight years old when the nightmares started

1:07:31 > 1:07:34I would lie in bed in a room endlessly expanding

1:07:34 > 1:07:36A voice would boom with an accent made of thunder

1:07:36 > 1:07:38And stone and I would have to clutch the quilt to the side

1:07:38 > 1:07:40Of my makeshift ship and ride that till I'd wake

1:07:40 > 1:07:42And feel my body ache from the ripples so

1:07:42 > 1:07:45Now he spent his time daydreaming about mornings

1:07:45 > 1:07:46When I would fall back to reality

1:07:46 > 1:07:49I'm tired but I can't risk screaming because at least when you wake

1:07:49 > 1:07:52In a cold sweat you know

1:07:52 > 1:07:54You've achieved

1:07:54 > 1:07:55Escape

1:07:56 > 1:08:00But in all that extra time you must get so much done!

1:08:00 > 1:08:03List of accomplished tasks since last sleeping 36 hours ago - one

1:08:03 > 1:08:06After three minutes of staring, finally found the comma key

1:08:06 > 1:08:09B - visited two rooms - four! I'm tired but I can't rest

1:08:09 > 1:08:12One - after three minutes of staring, finally found the comma key

1:08:12 > 1:08:16Two - created list of accomplished tasks and it's just not right enough

1:08:16 > 1:08:18Can't write enough, bruises appear, don't know how from

1:08:18 > 1:08:20Maybe they came when I'm about to fall, I'm tired

1:08:20 > 1:08:22But I can't rest, can't remember the word, lyrics to my favourite songs

1:08:22 > 1:08:24I'm tired but I can't rest

1:08:24 > 1:08:25Don't dare drive!

1:08:25 > 1:08:27Can't... WORDS BECOME INDISTINCT

1:08:27 > 1:08:28So brightly red, I'm tired

1:08:28 > 1:08:31Can't rest, pressure down like a diamond tired but I

1:08:31 > 1:08:32Can't rest, can't rest, can't...

1:08:32 > 1:08:34Can't...can't...

1:08:34 > 1:08:36Can't...

1:08:36 > 1:08:38CHEERING

1:08:56 > 1:08:58Oh, God.

1:08:58 > 1:08:59What's going on?

1:09:01 > 1:09:03I'm down with the kids on the street.

1:09:03 > 1:09:05LAUGHTER

1:09:05 > 1:09:07I'm telling them to be quiet.

1:09:07 > 1:09:08Mostly.

1:09:10 > 1:09:11What?

1:09:17 > 1:09:21OK, so we've seen the second round. The judges are adding up the scores,

1:09:21 > 1:09:23and in a moment...

1:09:23 > 1:09:26we will know who's in the final.

1:09:26 > 1:09:30- It's very tense. - What is?

1:09:30 > 1:09:32- Who's in the final. - Oh, yeah, it's very tense.

1:09:32 > 1:09:34It's really interesting, actually,

1:09:34 > 1:09:35cos last year we were back stage

1:09:35 > 1:09:38and we engaged in this massive group hug in this horrible, hippy,

1:09:38 > 1:09:42American kind of way and right now they're all back there working out.

1:09:42 > 1:09:45They're furiously pacing up and down and exercising.

1:09:45 > 1:09:47I'm exhausted just watching them.

1:09:47 > 1:09:49I'm exhausted.

1:09:49 > 1:09:50LAUGHTER

1:09:50 > 1:09:52- You're also exhausting. - Before I came here.

1:09:54 > 1:09:55But I've got my hat on.

1:09:57 > 1:09:58I really wish you wouldn't.

1:10:00 > 1:10:02Oh, look, Mike Dillon,

1:10:02 > 1:10:05former Scottish national slam champion,

1:10:05 > 1:10:07and score keeper.

1:10:11 > 1:10:15Oh, I'm not going to keep going. I'm going to turn you into a rapper.

1:10:15 > 1:10:17CHEERING AND LAUGHTER

1:10:18 > 1:10:21How long do I have to explain?

1:10:21 > 1:10:23VOICE FROM CROWD: Give us the Dalek one.

1:10:24 > 1:10:25Oh, God.

1:10:26 > 1:10:29For the final time ever.

1:10:29 > 1:10:34IN DALEK VOICE: As a busy working Da-a-alek

1:10:34 > 1:10:38Conquering planet after planet

1:10:38 > 1:10:44Sometimes I neglect my skincare...regime

1:10:45 > 1:10:49Which leads to metal fatigue

1:10:49 > 1:10:53And telltale signs of ageing

1:10:53 > 1:10:57Or r-r-r-r-rust

1:10:57 > 1:11:00As you humans call it

1:11:00 > 1:11:03I recommend Brillo Pads

1:11:03 > 1:11:06And battery acid

1:11:06 > 1:11:12To exfoliate, you must...exfoliate

1:11:12 > 1:11:15Use an angle grinder, preferably

1:11:15 > 1:11:18Or a bastard file

1:11:18 > 1:11:21Or r-r-rasp

1:11:21 > 1:11:22Moisturise

1:11:22 > 1:11:26You will need to...moisturise

1:11:26 > 1:11:30With diesel of cr-r-r-rude oil

1:11:31 > 1:11:36Then I can conquer my busy working day

1:11:36 > 1:11:41And not worry about cowering alien life forms

1:11:41 > 1:11:46Commenting on those little oxidation blemishes

1:11:46 > 1:11:50That can ruin a Dalek's...

1:11:50 > 1:11:51IN SMOOTH VOICE: ..confidence

1:11:51 > 1:11:53LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

1:11:53 > 1:11:57Brillo Pads and battery acid

1:11:58 > 1:12:01It's not really worth it.

1:12:01 > 1:12:03LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE

1:12:08 > 1:12:13All right, we have the people going through and we have a tie situation,

1:12:13 > 1:12:16so four poets are going through

1:12:16 > 1:12:20to the final. Two of them have the exact same score.

1:12:20 > 1:12:24They will appear on stage in this order in the next round -

1:12:24 > 1:12:26Agnes Torok...

1:12:26 > 1:12:28CHEERING

1:12:28 > 1:12:29..Toby Campion...

1:12:29 > 1:12:31CHEERING

1:12:31 > 1:12:33..Kirsten Luckins...

1:12:33 > 1:12:34CHEERING

1:12:34 > 1:12:37..and, finally, David Lee Morgan.

1:12:37 > 1:12:39CHEERING These are your final four poets.

1:12:39 > 1:12:43Please welcome Agnes Torok to the stage.

1:12:43 > 1:12:45CHEERING

1:12:57 > 1:13:00Give me a student

1:13:00 > 1:13:01Any student

1:13:01 > 1:13:05Give me only one definition of success and only one way to make it

1:13:05 > 1:13:08Give me academic excellence

1:13:08 > 1:13:10Give me full-time extracurriculars

1:13:10 > 1:13:13Give me a part-time job to pay the bills

1:13:13 > 1:13:18Give me internship followed by internship followed by...

1:13:18 > 1:13:22Internship followed by, uh, internship

1:13:22 > 1:13:25Give me a lifetime of debt

1:13:25 > 1:13:28Then tell me I am worthless

1:13:28 > 1:13:31Tell me my labour is not worth paying for

1:13:31 > 1:13:35Tell me it's a favour to hire me for free

1:13:35 > 1:13:36Go on

1:13:36 > 1:13:38Tell me I am worthless

1:13:38 > 1:13:42When in this country, millions of people compete for thousands of jobs

1:13:42 > 1:13:46Call it their own personal failure when they don't all get one

1:13:46 > 1:13:49When the young and the old and the sick have no way into a labour market

1:13:49 > 1:13:51Ever contracting, ever decreasing

1:13:51 > 1:13:54When you take money out of their opportunities for education

1:13:54 > 1:13:56And health, call it their fault

1:13:56 > 1:14:00Call them lazy, call them benefit scroungers

1:14:00 > 1:14:03Call it a culture of dependency, go on

1:14:03 > 1:14:06Tell us we are worthless

1:14:06 > 1:14:08Say it's not political

1:14:08 > 1:14:11Say it's just the way it is that foodbanks can be cut

1:14:11 > 1:14:14But big banks need to be bailed out

1:14:14 > 1:14:18That the minimum wage can stagnate and benefits be chopped off entirely

1:14:18 > 1:14:22But when the 1% made more off of the first year of the financial crisis

1:14:22 > 1:14:25Than they had for the 30 years before

1:14:25 > 1:14:26Call it austerity

1:14:26 > 1:14:28Go on

1:14:28 > 1:14:31Tell us we are worthless

1:14:31 > 1:14:33Tell us unemployment levels skyrocketing

1:14:33 > 1:14:35Have nothing to do with it

1:14:35 > 1:14:39Tell us being more likely to end up on the street than in a graduate job

1:14:39 > 1:14:42Has nothing to do with it

1:14:42 > 1:14:43Go on

1:14:43 > 1:14:45Tell me we're all middle class now

1:14:45 > 1:14:48Call call-centre workers and shelf stackers

1:14:48 > 1:14:49Garbage handlers and cleaners

1:14:49 > 1:14:53Call one out of five working for less than the minimum wage

1:14:53 > 1:14:55Which is less than the living wage

1:14:55 > 1:14:58Just middle class in the making

1:14:58 > 1:14:59Go on

1:14:59 > 1:15:02Tell us we are worthless

1:15:02 > 1:15:05Occupy my body as if it were a resource you could use

1:15:05 > 1:15:07To erase the GDP

1:15:07 > 1:15:09Broken back from all the heavy lifting

1:15:09 > 1:15:12Crumbling knees from all those hours

1:15:12 > 1:15:15Standing, depression and stress from the worry

1:15:16 > 1:15:18How will I pay rent this month?

1:15:18 > 1:15:24How will she support the kids? How will he pay the medical bills? Go on

1:15:24 > 1:15:27Tell us we are worthless

1:15:27 > 1:15:32Tell us the only thing not working about this system

1:15:32 > 1:15:34Is us.

1:15:34 > 1:15:37CHEERING

1:15:56 > 1:15:57A young boy

1:15:57 > 1:15:59Bringing together pale maps of innocence

1:15:59 > 1:16:01Not yet creased by this world

1:16:01 > 1:16:04Got on his knees and prayed

1:16:04 > 1:16:06And at the end he says, "PS, God

1:16:06 > 1:16:08"If you ever need someone to talk to

1:16:08 > 1:16:10"I'm here"

1:16:10 > 1:16:12He didn't know God would take him at his word

1:16:12 > 1:16:15Didn't know all of the things God had on her mind

1:16:15 > 1:16:16Terrible things

1:16:16 > 1:16:18She'd been waiting to get off her chest

1:16:18 > 1:16:20They flooded his head like locusts

1:16:20 > 1:16:22And boils and rivers of blood

1:16:22 > 1:16:25This was the 11th plague that had been waiting for him

1:16:25 > 1:16:27Filling his body with false idols and sin

1:16:27 > 1:16:29But no-one could see

1:16:29 > 1:16:32Why his face would twitch and his body would shudder

1:16:32 > 1:16:34Although they looked him in the eye

1:16:34 > 1:16:35Of the storm behind his forehead

1:16:35 > 1:16:37They couldn't see the turbulence in his lungs

1:16:37 > 1:16:39Couldn't see the lightning

1:16:39 > 1:16:43Striking holes in his guts so his stomach was always sinking

1:16:43 > 1:16:44When you hear a sick child

1:16:44 > 1:16:46You think chickenpox

1:16:46 > 1:16:49You don't think mental affliction that Calpol can't soothe

1:16:49 > 1:16:51And plasters won't cover

1:16:51 > 1:16:53No-one wants to believe that a child

1:16:53 > 1:16:56With so little in their brain can have so much on their mind

1:16:56 > 1:16:57So with blind eyes turned

1:16:57 > 1:17:01He carries on believing that these are confessions from God

1:17:01 > 1:17:03Anxious guilt that builds

1:17:03 > 1:17:05His cabin pressure builds

1:17:05 > 1:17:08His air sickness, he reaches for an oxygen mask that isn't there

1:17:08 > 1:17:10Some way to breathe

1:17:10 > 1:17:12Some way to say "Stop, I'm sorry

1:17:12 > 1:17:14"I can't be your psychiatrist any more, God

1:17:14 > 1:17:17"There's only room for one on this leather couch

1:17:17 > 1:17:18"And I think I need to lie down

1:17:18 > 1:17:20"I think I'm feeling a bit poorly

1:17:20 > 1:17:23"You let yourself into my mind but didn't shut the door behind you

1:17:23 > 1:17:24"I should have said

1:17:24 > 1:17:27"This was invite-only, there are no plus-ones

1:17:27 > 1:17:29"But I didn't know you're friends with demons, God

1:17:29 > 1:17:31"I didn't know the highwaymen you rode with

1:17:31 > 1:17:33"Who would hijack my happiness and now

1:17:33 > 1:17:35"I'm held hostage to a light switch -

1:17:35 > 1:17:37"One-two switch on, one-two switch off

1:17:37 > 1:17:39"And people just laugh at me

1:17:39 > 1:17:43"Just point and laugh at the freak in the doorway flicking the switches

1:17:43 > 1:17:46"And washing his hands and I want to scream 'I'm doing this for you!'

1:17:46 > 1:17:49"Without my one-two, one-two, the whole wide world would switch off

1:17:49 > 1:17:52"The weight of the whole wide world is on my back

1:17:52 > 1:17:54"But I have nothing in my hand but these maps

1:17:54 > 1:17:56"That won't tell me where to go

1:17:56 > 1:17:57"I am lost, God"

1:17:59 > 1:18:02If I could speak to him now

1:18:02 > 1:18:04I would say, "Young boy

1:18:04 > 1:18:06"You are doing so well

1:18:06 > 1:18:09"You are being so strong, brave boy

1:18:09 > 1:18:10"I know what they don't

1:18:10 > 1:18:13"I know your shoulders make London Bridge look like Lego

1:18:13 > 1:18:15"With the loads that they bear

1:18:15 > 1:18:18"I know your smile is a war zone

1:18:18 > 1:18:20"I know you talk the voices in your head down from ledges

1:18:20 > 1:18:22"Every single day

1:18:22 > 1:18:24"Clever boy

1:18:24 > 1:18:25"This, too, shall pass

1:18:25 > 1:18:28"And I don't have the answers to give you

1:18:28 > 1:18:29"But brave boy

1:18:29 > 1:18:32"Don't blame yourself for trying to be good

1:18:32 > 1:18:35"And don't blame God for the Devil's work."

1:18:36 > 1:18:38Thank you.

1:18:38 > 1:18:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:19:03 > 1:19:05This house looks like a bomb site.

1:19:09 > 1:19:11It's dark in here.

1:19:12 > 1:19:15I'm scared I'm already dead

1:19:16 > 1:19:17And you won't hear me

1:19:19 > 1:19:21I forgot to put on my rings.

1:19:22 > 1:19:24I was washing up when it hit.

1:19:26 > 1:19:28You'd forget your head, you'd say

1:19:29 > 1:19:31And then marry me again.

1:19:33 > 1:19:35It's the little things.

1:19:36 > 1:19:39Spoons under a Sunday duvet

1:19:39 > 1:19:41Cuppa puppa tea

1:19:42 > 1:19:45I'd put the kettle on this time, love

1:19:45 > 1:19:46No argument

1:19:47 > 1:19:49But I'm finding it hard to move.

1:19:51 > 1:19:53Lover, help me

1:19:55 > 1:20:00I can't tell which is floor or where the ceiling went

1:20:03 > 1:20:08I always thought that you would be holding my hand

1:20:08 > 1:20:10Or I would be holding yours

1:20:11 > 1:20:13But always us.

1:20:14 > 1:20:18Ever since we first pulled down the vow

1:20:18 > 1:20:22And felt it land so lightly.

1:20:23 > 1:20:26I'm covered in brick dust

1:20:27 > 1:20:30So you should remember me laughing

1:20:32 > 1:20:34Me at my best.

1:20:36 > 1:20:37I'm so sorry, love

1:20:38 > 1:20:40I left you to clear up all the mess.

1:20:42 > 1:20:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:21:06 > 1:21:07What is to be done?

1:21:09 > 1:21:13The revolution will not come until it has pierced your heart

1:21:13 > 1:21:14Until every cruelty and injustice

1:21:14 > 1:21:16No matter who it is done to

1:21:16 > 1:21:17Feels as if it were done to you

1:21:18 > 1:21:22Until you are naked, open wide, wounded by every homeless cry

1:21:22 > 1:21:23A mother to every hungry child

1:21:23 > 1:21:25A native son to every tribe

1:21:25 > 1:21:27Stranded in the forest flames

1:21:27 > 1:21:28Swallowing smoke and tears of rage

1:21:28 > 1:21:30Running from the thunder of the helicopter gun.

1:21:30 > 1:21:32The revolution will not come

1:21:32 > 1:21:34Until your back aches and the sun bakes you

1:21:34 > 1:21:37And the pain breaks you until every minute of your life hurts

1:21:37 > 1:21:39And the ripe fruit falls down into the dirt

1:21:39 > 1:21:42Because your fingers and your bones and your brain are numb.

1:21:42 > 1:21:44The revolution will not come

1:21:44 > 1:21:46Until every cop car is looking for you

1:21:46 > 1:21:48For what you are, not what you do

1:21:48 > 1:21:50And you stand on the earth branded by the wrong action

1:21:50 > 1:21:52The wrong coloured tongue

1:21:52 > 1:21:53The wrong sexuality

1:21:53 > 1:21:54The wrong mother tongue

1:21:54 > 1:21:55Too fat, too thin, too old, too young.

1:21:55 > 1:21:57The revolution will not come

1:21:57 > 1:22:00Until you walk the streets bearing unwanted seed

1:22:00 > 1:22:03Condemned to breed by men who call you girl

1:22:03 > 1:22:04And think they bloody own the world

1:22:04 > 1:22:06Until you stare up into the hate-filled face

1:22:06 > 1:22:08Of a rapist thrusting into you

1:22:08 > 1:22:11When you can smell his breath, taste the rancid kiss

1:22:11 > 1:22:13When your stomach twists in anger and disgust

1:22:13 > 1:22:16When you can feel of this as if it were done to you.

1:22:16 > 1:22:18It's not enough

1:22:18 > 1:22:20Because the revolution will not come

1:22:20 > 1:22:22Until it has made you wise

1:22:22 > 1:22:24So what if you hate injustice?

1:22:24 > 1:22:26So what if you're willing to die to make a change?

1:22:26 > 1:22:28It's not enough to brave

1:22:28 > 1:22:29Not even enough to love

1:22:29 > 1:22:32Unless love leads to wisdom when push comes to shove.

1:22:32 > 1:22:34So you learn to read books and faces

1:22:34 > 1:22:36You study what gender and race is

1:22:36 > 1:22:39You look at science and the economy at every class and group in society

1:22:39 > 1:22:41You study the past But you don't live in it

1:22:41 > 1:22:42You don't worship it

1:22:42 > 1:22:45You don't pick through the rubble for a lost god to believe in

1:22:45 > 1:22:48You read history not with a branding iron but a blowtorch

1:22:48 > 1:22:50You are not a king You are not a priest

1:22:50 > 1:22:51You are not singing in the bloody choir

1:22:51 > 1:22:54You are the fire that burns through history

1:22:54 > 1:22:57Your genealogy is written in the ashes of burnt-out villages

1:22:57 > 1:22:58Crucified slaves

1:22:58 > 1:23:00Weavers chained to their looms

1:23:00 > 1:23:01Heretics burned at the stake

1:23:01 > 1:23:04Screaming out the truth.

1:23:04 > 1:23:06How many thousands of years of fighting each other

1:23:06 > 1:23:07Over the never enough?

1:23:07 > 1:23:09One class over after another rising to the top

1:23:09 > 1:23:11And beating back down everyone else

1:23:11 > 1:23:13With laws and religion and bullets

1:23:13 > 1:23:14When you don't listen?

1:23:14 > 1:23:16How many thousands of years of system after system

1:23:16 > 1:23:19And always the same fundamental division?

1:23:19 > 1:23:21You work, they rule

1:23:21 > 1:23:23But you are more than just a talking tool

1:23:23 > 1:23:25Let the revolution be your school

1:23:25 > 1:23:27Study the connections

1:23:27 > 1:23:31And you begin to see the chains of slavery are chains of power too

1:23:31 > 1:23:34The connect you to an army of the dispossessed

1:23:34 > 1:23:36And it's an army you will need

1:23:36 > 1:23:38Because the revolution will not come

1:23:38 > 1:23:40Until it has made you strong.

1:23:40 > 1:23:42Power is a good thing

1:23:42 > 1:23:44Try living without it

1:23:44 > 1:23:46But without a doubt it divides into two

1:23:46 > 1:23:47The power to win is the power to lose

1:23:47 > 1:23:49Power is nothing but the power to choose

1:23:49 > 1:23:51It's only as good as how you use it

1:23:51 > 1:23:54So be leaders who know how to be led

1:23:54 > 1:23:56Be teachers who know how to be taught

1:23:56 > 1:23:58Revolution is a war that has to be fought

1:23:58 > 1:24:01They got the guns and the weapons of mass communication

1:24:01 > 1:24:04You got the power to the people that comes with organisation

1:24:04 > 1:24:05You got the power to the people

1:24:05 > 1:24:07But you better believe they hate it

1:24:07 > 1:24:08If you give 'em a chance

1:24:08 > 1:24:09They'll break it BUZZER SOUNDS

1:24:09 > 1:24:11You know it's only as good as you make it

1:24:11 > 1:24:12You got the power to the people

1:24:12 > 1:24:14Are you ready to take it?

1:24:15 > 1:24:18CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:24:29 > 1:24:31A round of applause for all four finalists.

1:24:31 > 1:24:33CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:24:36 > 1:24:40We're going to introduce all of the poets back to the stage,

1:24:40 > 1:24:45except Amanda Baker, who's had to go home because she has childcare.

1:24:45 > 1:24:48Issues she has to get off, so she's got off.

1:24:48 > 1:24:50- Shall we introduce them? - Yes, can we please welcome

1:24:50 > 1:24:51to the stage Agnes Torok?!

1:24:53 > 1:24:56David Lee Morgan.

1:24:56 > 1:24:57Toby Campion.

1:24:59 > 1:25:00Kevin McLean.

1:25:07 > 1:25:09Kevin McLean, come on.

1:25:09 > 1:25:10Charlie Dupre.

1:25:13 > 1:25:16Who is apparently not there, but he's fantastic.

1:25:16 > 1:25:17Kirsten Luckins.

1:25:20 > 1:25:22Have they all just fled?

1:25:24 > 1:25:27Honestly, it's like herding cats.

1:25:27 > 1:25:29Where's the other one? Where's Kevin?

1:25:29 > 1:25:30Charlie Dupre, I announced you already.

1:25:30 > 1:25:32Charlie Dupre.

1:25:34 > 1:25:35So these are our...

1:25:37 > 1:25:39This is the heat certificate winners.

1:25:39 > 1:25:43One for Toby for winning heat two, cos there were nine poets in that

1:25:43 > 1:25:47and it really was hard to win, so they've all got certificates.

1:25:51 > 1:25:54Agnes Torok won heat three.

1:25:57 > 1:25:59David Lee Morgan won heat four.

1:26:04 > 1:26:07And Amanda Baker has gone.

1:26:09 > 1:26:11So we can give this to her.

1:26:11 > 1:26:14I'll get this delivered to her by a pigeon.

1:26:17 > 1:26:22The other tube is our audience...

1:26:22 > 1:26:25our audience thing.

1:26:25 > 1:26:28We decided we'd choose a queen of the audience,

1:26:28 > 1:26:31someone who's been to all of the slams.

1:26:31 > 1:26:33Cos slam cannot happen without the audience,

1:26:33 > 1:26:35and that deserves a little bit of recognising.

1:26:35 > 1:26:38So where's Trish Trainer?

1:26:38 > 1:26:39CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:26:47 > 1:26:52Five slams in five days at the Edinburgh Fringe is a big deal.

1:27:02 > 1:27:03Can we also...?

1:27:03 > 1:27:06Just to make them worry for another couple of seconds about who won,

1:27:06 > 1:27:09this has been in the works since about February.

1:27:09 > 1:27:13It takes six months of organising and it is organised by one person

1:27:13 > 1:27:16and one person only, and there's a reason I'm here for energy,

1:27:16 > 1:27:19it's because it's been him, the poor man.

1:27:19 > 1:27:22Can we get a round of applause for Kevin Cadwallender?

1:27:22 > 1:27:24CHEERING

1:27:30 > 1:27:32Wow. Do you want me to do it?

1:27:35 > 1:27:39In second place - Toby Campion.

1:27:39 > 1:27:41CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:27:44 > 1:27:47It gives me a massive deal of pleasure

1:27:47 > 1:27:51to pass my title on to a very dear friend of mine.

1:27:51 > 1:27:54A poet I have respected since 2008 -

1:27:54 > 1:27:56David Lee Morgan.

1:27:56 > 1:27:59CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:28:07 > 1:28:11There's times in poetry slams where gimmickry does well.

1:28:11 > 1:28:14It's not very often that someone can come up

1:28:14 > 1:28:17and do six poems in a row that matter and win.

1:28:17 > 1:28:20David Lee Morgan, that was a really big achievement.

1:28:20 > 1:28:21It was wicked.

1:28:23 > 1:28:25Thank you, David.

1:28:28 > 1:28:29David...

1:28:33 > 1:28:36Oh, there's all this hugging. I don't know what poetry's coming to.

1:28:36 > 1:28:39I'm sorry, I'm really happy about it.

1:28:39 > 1:28:42David, would you like to deliver another poem?

1:28:44 > 1:28:46Whatever you would like.

1:28:46 > 1:28:49I think I should do a short one.

1:28:52 > 1:28:54CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:29:00 > 1:29:04This is such a thrill to win that.

1:29:04 > 1:29:09I'm so excited. This is one of the best...

1:29:09 > 1:29:11Well, I would say that, wouldn't I?

1:29:11 > 1:29:13But it is one of the best-judged slams,

1:29:13 > 1:29:16big slams, going in the country.

1:29:18 > 1:29:20Poets get up here,

1:29:20 > 1:29:24not just kind of stunt men, that often win other slams.

1:29:24 > 1:29:25OK, my poem.

1:29:25 > 1:29:28Let's have a short poem about cigarette smoking

1:29:28 > 1:29:32in what I imagine to be the Classical Greek mode.

1:29:34 > 1:29:36Ode To The Cigarette.

1:29:38 > 1:29:41Oh, phallic nipple!

1:29:42 > 1:29:44I said it was short.

1:29:45 > 1:29:46CHEERING AND APPLAUSE

1:29:57 > 1:29:59OK, guys.

1:29:59 > 1:30:02OK, I hope you've enjoyed the 2014 Poetry Slam.

1:30:04 > 1:30:08That was Kevin Cadwallender. I have been Sophia Walker.

1:30:08 > 1:30:09In case you don't know it,

1:30:09 > 1:30:13that man actually brought slam poetry to the UK in the early '70s.

1:30:13 > 1:30:16Americans try and say it was invented in 1984.

1:30:16 > 1:30:19Interesting how he was hosting slams in Edinburgh in '71.

1:30:19 > 1:30:21It's all lies.

1:30:22 > 1:30:26It's all lies. Everyone knows who invented slam.

1:30:26 > 1:30:27Uh-huh.

1:30:27 > 1:30:29It was...wrestlers.

1:30:31 > 1:30:36So this is a symbolic passing of the baton over to Sophia.

1:30:36 > 1:30:40I will be your host next year. Let's see you back in 2015.

1:30:40 > 1:30:42Enjoy yourselves, good night.

1:30:42 > 1:30:43CHEERING AND APPLAUSE