0:00:33 > 0:00:37- Morning, Gerry.- How are you today? Are you in England?
0:00:37 > 0:00:39- I'm flying home right now. - Well, you know, at the moment?
0:00:39 > 0:00:41There's a taxi waiting for me right now.
0:00:41 > 0:00:42HORN BEEPS
0:00:42 > 0:00:45And my flight is shortly after 12 o'clock.
0:00:45 > 0:00:47It will be undoubtedly delayed.
0:00:47 > 0:00:51And on Friday I had this experience that I would like to share with you.
0:00:51 > 0:00:52Oh, that's nice.
0:00:52 > 0:00:55- And this is what happened. I was sitting on the Flybe flight.- Yes.
0:00:55 > 0:00:58And I was squeezed against the window, and the plane was full.
0:00:58 > 0:01:00And I was lucky, cos the seat beside me was empty.
0:01:00 > 0:01:02And I thought, happy days, this is brilliant!
0:01:02 > 0:01:04Get the legs stretched out at last!
0:01:04 > 0:01:08Onto the plane, and my seat was the only one that was then empty,
0:01:08 > 0:01:12- onto the plane walked the last passenger.- Very big man, was he?
0:01:12 > 0:01:15He had to be about ten stone heavier than me.
0:01:15 > 0:01:16HE LAUGHS
0:01:16 > 0:01:19And I thought, oh, please, no! This is like a sitcom.
0:01:19 > 0:01:22And he squeezed into this seat,
0:01:22 > 0:01:25and all I can describe it as is bum-on-bum.
0:01:25 > 0:01:31And his thigh pressed against mine!
0:01:32 > 0:01:34And, Gerry, I was traumatised for the whole flight!
0:01:34 > 0:01:36HE BURPS
0:01:36 > 0:01:38And just I...I was sweating when I got out of this,
0:01:38 > 0:01:41but this man's flesh pressed against mine!
0:01:41 > 0:01:45I'll let you go. Good morning!
0:01:45 > 0:01:49HE PLAYS GUITAR
0:01:51 > 0:01:53I touched a Beatle on the elbow.
0:01:53 > 0:01:55- A real Beatle?- Yeah.
0:01:55 > 0:01:58- Which one was it?- George. - George Harrison, you touched him!
0:01:58 > 0:02:02- This is the sort of thing that'll make the people celebrate... - I forgot all about that.- I know.
0:02:02 > 0:02:04And you take it off from here.
0:02:04 > 0:02:10And he said to me, he says, "Excuse me", he says, "Where's such-and-such road?"
0:02:10 > 0:02:13- You see? And I...I really... - Did you know who it was?
0:02:13 > 0:02:17When he started to speak I realised, this is...this is George Harrison!
0:02:17 > 0:02:20- Yes.- So I walked over to him. And I touched him on the elbow.
0:02:20 > 0:02:24I didn't realise, I said, "Look, over there!" And I made up these directions.
0:02:24 > 0:02:27- So you sent him the wrong...- I didn't know where it was...
0:02:27 > 0:02:30You sent him the wrong way. And you said, "Up there and turn left and..."
0:02:30 > 0:02:33"Turn left and keep on going, and you'll see the signs then
0:02:33 > 0:02:35for the M56 or whatever, and he says, "Right...
0:02:35 > 0:02:39- "Ta, mate," or summat.- You sent him down The Long And Winding Road.
0:02:39 > 0:02:40I did!
0:02:40 > 0:02:42BOTH: Ha-ha-ha!
0:02:42 > 0:02:43I bet that was the inspiration for the song!
0:02:43 > 0:02:45It's Nowhere Man, that's where he was going!
0:02:45 > 0:02:49But I decided that I would never wash my finger again.
0:02:49 > 0:02:52Well, by the look of it, I don't think you ever have.
0:02:52 > 0:02:53BOTH: Ha-ha-ha!
0:02:53 > 0:02:56I'm going to tell a story now, it's a pretty short story.
0:02:56 > 0:02:58No! Who cares?
0:02:58 > 0:03:00- Would you shut up! Do I have to turn you off?- OK, go on.
0:03:00 > 0:03:03I'm going to tell the story and let the listeners be the judge
0:03:03 > 0:03:05as to whether or not this happened to me or not.
0:03:05 > 0:03:07I walked into a certain place.
0:03:07 > 0:03:10Not, I might add, in Derry/Londonderry,
0:03:10 > 0:03:11and in comes Phil Lynott.
0:03:11 > 0:03:16And you want to have seen him - he looked like a Greek God.
0:03:16 > 0:03:18And the whole place just stopped.
0:03:18 > 0:03:22And everybody just idolised him, and he came up to the bar,
0:03:22 > 0:03:25and he went, "Give us a pint of Steelhead".
0:03:25 > 0:03:28And the pints started to appear by magic, and he stood there
0:03:28 > 0:03:32and everybody was around him, saying, "Oh, Phil, great, what time you up?"
0:03:32 > 0:03:33So he was the hero of the hour.
0:03:33 > 0:03:36And everybody kept buying him drink, and the drink came flying up.
0:03:36 > 0:03:40But I was standing watching this, and I said, "Phil, I'm so happy for you, you've made it.
0:03:40 > 0:03:43"Maybe someday we'll make it and we'll be like you."
0:03:43 > 0:03:45And then, as time went on, the night went on,
0:03:45 > 0:03:48and these women were all hanging round him.
0:03:48 > 0:03:52I was trying to get with the ones that fell off him, trying to get them.
0:03:52 > 0:03:56And then I got fed up, so I just decide to go home,
0:03:56 > 0:04:00but on my way home I decided to go into the toilet for a jimmy riddle, you know.
0:04:00 > 0:04:04- So I'm standing there, you know what it's like when you're standing there. - Oh...
0:04:04 > 0:04:05I'm just trying to paint the picture!
0:04:05 > 0:04:08- More information than we need. - Paint the picture.- OK.
0:04:08 > 0:04:11And I looked around, and there was Phil Lynott standing beside me.
0:04:11 > 0:04:14And he went, "How are you, Gerry?"
0:04:14 > 0:04:17I said, "I'm all right, Phil".
0:04:17 > 0:04:19He said, "Could you do me a favour?" I says, "What?"
0:04:19 > 0:04:22He said, "Lend us a tenner, will you?"
0:04:22 > 0:04:24I says, "What?" He said, "Lend us a tenner."
0:04:24 > 0:04:28I said, "What do you mean, lend you a tenner?" He says, "I'm busted. I'm broke."
0:04:28 > 0:04:32He said, "There's nothing worse than people thinking you have money when you have none."
0:04:32 > 0:04:36So there you are, I gave him a tenner, he went out and bought a drink.
0:04:36 > 0:04:41He had no money. So there he had stardom, adulation, fame, no money.
0:04:41 > 0:04:43And I suddenly said to myself,
0:04:43 > 0:04:45that's what show business is about.
0:04:45 > 0:04:47It's all about appearance.
0:04:51 > 0:04:54Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:04:54 > 0:04:57E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk