:00:24. > :00:30.Welcome to The One Show for their haul hour. Tonight, we are working
:00:30. > :00:37.with children and animals. There goes the first rule of telly. The
:00:37. > :00:47.first ever One Show dog show. We have the wackiest tale. That is the
:00:47. > :00:48.
:00:48. > :00:58.dogs, but who are the kids? Only the funniest kids on telly. Ramona
:00:58. > :01:02.
:01:02. > :01:07.Her hello. Nice to have you here. Thanks for coming on. You are so
:01:07. > :01:11.famous, you three. It is not a question, just a statement. Lots of
:01:11. > :01:18.kids going back to school. Any of you been back? Today was my first
:01:18. > :01:25.day. How was it? I guess it was a bit tiring. We had random tests.
:01:25. > :01:32.And got all of our books. What was the test? To put you into your
:01:32. > :01:37.learning groups. How did you do? think I've failed. Tyger, why are
:01:37. > :01:42.you laughing? It is a big, new school for him, he must have been
:01:42. > :01:51.nervous. Are you looking forward to going back to school, Ramona?
:01:51. > :01:59.because... My friend before the holidays, a while before, left to
:01:59. > :02:06.go somewhere, and she has been away for six weeks. More than that.
:02:06. > :02:13.have missed her? Yes. That's nice, you will see them soon. Are you the
:02:14. > :02:17.most famous kid at your own school? Yeah. How does that go down? If I
:02:17. > :02:22.went around saying that, I would probably get beaten up. We know
:02:22. > :02:30.that, but who is the most famous apart from you? Previously, Jeremy
:02:30. > :02:34.Vine and Tim Vine. That's enough. Thanks very much. Earlier this week,
:02:35. > :02:39.Dom took us on a trip to the stunning island of Fetlar in the
:02:39. > :02:45.Shetlands. It is a gorgeous, tranquil place whose 70 inhabitants
:02:45. > :02:50.enjoy peace and quiet. They did until movie stardom came calling,
:02:50. > :02:54.when they went audition crazy. This is what happened.
:02:54. > :03:00.Having recently visited Fetlar for the first time and got to know some
:03:00. > :03:03.of its inhabitants, among them Bob the postman and young advocate for
:03:03. > :03:08.the island, Rachel box or, I discovered a beautiful but remote
:03:08. > :03:12.place, still in desperate need to promote itself. And now, a British
:03:12. > :03:17.movie with a �5 million budget is being filmed right here on Fetlar.
:03:17. > :03:20.That could be its chance to put itself on the map. The film,
:03:20. > :03:24.Between Weathers, is a drama about remote island life and the
:03:24. > :03:28.producers are holding auditions for the movie, attracting folk from
:03:28. > :03:33.Fetlar and across the Shetlands. What is the significance of this
:03:33. > :03:37.film? The story was ready to go, I didn't have a location. I was
:03:37. > :03:41.sitting at Heathrow, waiting to get a plane to Aberdeen, I looked up
:03:41. > :03:45.and Shetland was on. It looked fantastic. I thought immediately,
:03:45. > :03:49.this is where the movie has to be said. What sort of people are you
:03:49. > :03:53.looking for? You have heard the people speak, they have a certain
:03:53. > :03:57.look about them, a song to their voice. I wanted to capture all of
:03:57. > :04:03.that. Having the right voice isn't all it is about. I wanted to see
:04:03. > :04:12.how people were getting along with learning their lines. You look just
:04:12. > :04:15.the same. That's you. No, it is still you.
:04:15. > :04:25.With nerves on the knife-edge, it was time to impress the judges. On
:04:25. > :04:34.
:04:34. > :04:40.the panel, the head of casting, the Next. I saw the video blog. Why did
:04:40. > :04:48.you do it, it is not how it is. enjoyed that. You confused me when
:04:49. > :04:52.I was standing here. Next. This one will close when I leave. Fantastic.
:04:52. > :04:57.It wasn't long before a few familiar Fetlar faces had to face
:04:57. > :05:03.the panel as well. You have gone greyer, it suits you. You look just
:05:03. > :05:09.the same. Well done. I have had my life put on hold for the past 10
:05:09. > :05:17.years. If that makes me sound a bit bitter, I am sorry. Oh! I'm not
:05:17. > :05:22.going to argue with you! Hello. survived. I wasn't quite as nervous
:05:22. > :05:27.as I thought I might be. Do you think you got it? No. Don't say
:05:27. > :05:31.that! Be optimistic. Yes, for sure! Would I get the part or not is
:05:31. > :05:37.irrelevant. This film will be good for the island. It was fun, or
:05:37. > :05:39.taking part. It is the love for the island that has also prompted local
:05:39. > :05:44.businessman George to invest in the film. You will get your money back
:05:44. > :05:46.if it is successful but you're not getting a profit, are you? It is a
:05:46. > :05:49.social investment and we want to make sure that anything that comes
:05:49. > :05:53.out of the movie goes back to the people on the island. It is to make
:05:53. > :05:58.sure we look after communities like this, because if we don't, they
:05:58. > :06:02.will die off and the islands will empty. Back inside, the auditions
:06:02. > :06:08.were hotting up, with one special role being fought over by man's
:06:08. > :06:15.best friend. Who is auditioning here? Both of us. What special
:06:15. > :06:20.skills that has he got? He eats. All dogs eat. He eats a lot.
:06:20. > :06:26.panel had already spotted who is top dog around here. You have got
:06:26. > :06:34.the part. Now get out before you mess him -- mess up my cross.
:06:34. > :06:39.dog can get a part, why not me? it you come. I think they have
:06:39. > :06:44.given you do wrong outfit. Take it in your own time. The lure of money,
:06:44. > :06:48.ambition, and success has slowly drained the life blood of this
:06:48. > :06:54.island, Fetlar. I would say with the arrival of your good people,
:06:54. > :07:01.that blood will once again course through the veins of Fetlar. That
:07:01. > :07:05.was terrific. I would be needing to use this, then, will I? The
:07:05. > :07:09.experience of coming to Fetlar is one I shall always remember. I have
:07:09. > :07:14.learned to experience -- appreciate the tranquillity of the lifestyle
:07:14. > :07:19.here, and this city boy may well be coming back soon.
:07:19. > :07:25.It is so beautiful. Would you go back? Yeah, tomorrow. It is
:07:25. > :07:30.stunning. I would be cautious about the winter. That could be harsh.
:07:30. > :07:34.But when I was there, lovely. Tuesday we spoke about the
:07:34. > :07:38.population problem. Lots of people e-mailed him, asking how they could
:07:38. > :07:44.move there. Are their properties, houses for sale, do they still need
:07:44. > :07:47.people? In 2007, there were about 800 inquiries and the people said,
:07:47. > :07:51.we didn't really have the infrastructure in place to handle
:07:52. > :07:55.those inquiries. That has changed. A lot of things are changing. There
:07:55. > :07:59.houses which have been empty for hundreds of years, they are being
:07:59. > :08:03.encouraged by the owners to sell them on. They are putting in a new
:08:03. > :08:06.harbour, so that fishing boats can more there. And the fact that
:08:07. > :08:10.employment would start to increase as well. They are hoping to get
:08:10. > :08:15.fibre-optic broadband. There are loads of things happening to make
:08:15. > :08:23.it possible for people to move there. Fetlar have a website, we
:08:23. > :08:28.will put that on our website. You can start making inquiries. Who got
:08:28. > :08:32.through the auditions? Bob, the postman, has got through, and he is
:08:32. > :08:40.playing the part of Bob the postman. It is not easy to play yourself.
:08:40. > :08:50.was a natural. Rachel is going to play the part of the check-in girl
:08:50. > :08:59.We saw you audition, what is the news? I only know a little bit of
:08:59. > :09:07.the news. I have heard I have got a part. But... I haven't got a Scooby
:09:07. > :09:12.Doo what that is yet. We have that information. You so impress the
:09:12. > :09:17.director, not only do you have a part, but they have written a part
:09:17. > :09:25.specifically for Dominic Littlewood. Really? You will be throughout the
:09:25. > :09:29.whole film and you will play... A bus driver. Congratulations. I need
:09:29. > :09:37.some tips, what would I need to play a bus driver? Get to know your
:09:37. > :09:43.way around London. Actually, Fetlar. There are probably not that many
:09:43. > :09:49.roads. There is not that many in anything. Don't give him a hard
:09:49. > :09:59.time, you asked for his advice! presume you have a driving licence.
:09:59. > :10:07.
:10:07. > :10:11.Could point. -- good pointer. Dom The show is back tonight, full of
:10:11. > :10:15.family events where they embarrass their parents. Our next film is
:10:15. > :10:18.about a devoted dad who was already he would embarrass his daughter.
:10:18. > :10:28.Simon Boazman went to see how he hoped to get through one of the
:10:28. > :10:29.
:10:29. > :10:33.It is every father's dream to see their daughter walk down the aisle.
:10:33. > :10:37.My little girl is only 10 and I am already starting to think about her
:10:37. > :10:40.big day. For most ads, the highlight is getting to sing their
:10:40. > :10:45.daughters praises to all and sundry during the father of the bride
:10:45. > :10:51.speech. But for one bad, it has become a very daunting prospect. 18
:10:51. > :10:59.months ago, 53-year-old Mark Lawson was diagnosed with early onset
:10:59. > :11:08.Parkinson's. In some patients, the disease can affect speech. It just
:11:08. > :11:14.came on and it... It... This seemed to be like... It was... A... Little
:11:14. > :11:18.bit. The more I tried to get... Get the words out, the harder it
:11:18. > :11:25.actually became to say it, and the more stressed you get about not
:11:25. > :11:29.being able to say it... The more difficult everything becomes.
:11:29. > :11:37.used to go out quite a lot, with friends. Or of a sudden, he didn't
:11:37. > :11:41.want to do anything, at all. Once a speech stammer started, he started
:11:41. > :11:45.withdrawing in a crowd. He couldn't say things quick enough, or think
:11:45. > :11:48.things quick enough. With his daughter's wedding fast approaching,
:11:48. > :11:55.soon, all eyes will be on Mark, as he delivers the father of the
:11:55. > :12:02.bride's speech. I am absolutely terrified of... Of embarrassing
:12:02. > :12:06.myself... And... And embarrassing her as well. I have only got this
:12:06. > :12:11.one opportunity to say... To say what I want to save. You don't get
:12:11. > :12:17.any second chances. The worst scenario is totally drying up.
:12:17. > :12:23.Not... Not... Not... Being able to get anything out. And I know them,
:12:23. > :12:28.the more I am struggling, the more difficult it is going to be...
:12:28. > :12:32.Probably break my heart and cry. This is lovely.
:12:33. > :12:40.In an attempt to put his mind at ease, Mark has come for look around
:12:40. > :12:46.the wedding venue. Hello. Is this where it is going to be? Now you
:12:46. > :12:50.can see it, it is all becoming very real. Is this helping? It is, I can
:12:50. > :12:55.visualise myself in the right position. Where I am visualising it,
:12:55. > :12:58.I am in front of thousands of people. Determined not to let his
:12:58. > :13:02.illness spoil his daughter's big day, Mark approached speech
:13:02. > :13:06.therapist Mike Richards at Weston- super-Mare Hospital, to see if
:13:06. > :13:10.anything could be done to help him. Over half of people with
:13:10. > :13:15.Parkinson's disease will find they have speech problems. Some of those
:13:15. > :13:19.people will find they have stammer like symptoms. Mike decided to try
:13:19. > :13:25.altered or degree feedback technology. But it doesn't work on
:13:25. > :13:30.anyone -- everyone. When we talk normally, we subconsciously listen
:13:30. > :13:37.to what we are saying, so there is a feedback process. Altered
:13:37. > :13:43.auditory the feedback changes that, by picking up the speech and
:13:43. > :13:47.playing it in a different way. It is something that can be seen in
:13:47. > :13:51.the film, the King's Speech, when the king is wearing headphones and
:13:51. > :13:55.it disrupts his normal feedback process. The effect is to slightly
:13:55. > :13:59.slow the speech down, giving the brain time to catch up, and
:13:59. > :14:04.therefore reducing the stammer. While this old technique might be
:14:04. > :14:07.fit for a king, it can also cost a king's ransom. The device
:14:07. > :14:12.traditionally used for this kind of therapy is not widely available on
:14:12. > :14:18.the NHS and can cost over �1,000, which is too much for Mark. But
:14:18. > :14:22.modern technology might offer him a much more affordable alternative.
:14:22. > :14:28.found there was a smart phone up that found it -- claimed it could
:14:28. > :14:32.do the same job -- a smart phones app. It was less than �10. It
:14:32. > :14:39.seemed too good to be true. This is it, the thing that has changed your
:14:39. > :14:46.life. How does it work? It is an ordinary Bluetooth earpiece. When I
:14:46. > :14:51.press this button, you will see an immediate change in how everything
:14:51. > :14:55.happens. Tension is starting to build. The question that still
:14:56. > :15:05.remains, is Mark's gadget going to save the day. There's only one way
:15:06. > :15:06.
:15:07. > :15:11.I would like to welcome you to the wedding of Andrew and Melissa. This
:15:11. > :15:15.is my little girl and she always will be. I love her dearly. Look
:15:15. > :15:23.after her. Ladies and gentlemen, I would like you to stand and drink a
:15:23. > :15:27.bumper toast. The actual wedding was on Sunday
:15:27. > :15:34.and it was a private affair so we did not gatecrash it. Mark is here
:15:34. > :15:38.tonight. How did it go? How was your speech? Everything went fine.
:15:38. > :15:43.I was so confident the technology would work that I stood up to do
:15:43. > :15:47.the speech without plugging it in. I welcomed the guests, apologised,
:15:47. > :15:55.switched on the technology and carried on with the speech. And you
:15:55. > :16:00.have it with you now. Yes. Is it helping you now? When I'm using it,
:16:00. > :16:10.I do not have any problems. Thank you for being with us. A round of
:16:10. > :16:11.
:16:11. > :16:14.applause for Mark. In the film we saw there, we saw a clip of the
:16:14. > :16:19.King's Speech and you played Princess Margaret in that. Shall we
:16:19. > :16:25.have a look? Actually, we are not having a look, we are just going to
:16:25. > :16:33.talk about it. Well, can you still curtsey? Would you like to curtsy
:16:33. > :16:41.for us? OK, shall I stand? Queen has seen this, apparently.
:16:41. > :16:46.Look at that, brilliant. Oscar- winning! The Queen has seen the
:16:46. > :16:51.film, likes it and things you were great. How does that make you feel?
:16:51. > :16:59.Don't be shy. You are by royal appointment. That means she has
:16:59. > :17:05.given you her seal of approval, like jam. It's true. It is strange.
:17:05. > :17:10.I think it would be more strange for the girls -- for the girl that
:17:10. > :17:16.actually plays her when she was little. That would be strange.
:17:16. > :17:24.is going to play Stephen Fry? Who has played a young Stephen Fry?
:17:24. > :17:34.Tell us about that. #ColourCyan well, it was quite strange. Why are
:17:34. > :17:36.
:17:36. > :17:39.you playing a young Stephen Fry? it was for a short series of films
:17:39. > :17:49.called Little Crackers. #ColourYellow is it true that
:17:49. > :17:55.
:17:55. > :18:01.Stephen Fry played your headmaster? Were you asking him for tips?
:18:01. > :18:06.Star Trek -- star-struck. He was very friendly. He talked with my
:18:06. > :18:12.dad, making him coffee every morning. For some strange reason!
:18:13. > :18:20.In the end, he said I played him better than he ever would.
:18:20. > :18:25.Typically Stephen. Both of you are in a documentary about sitcoms. And
:18:25. > :18:31.did you say that My Family, your rival, is a bit predictable? Would
:18:31. > :18:41.you like to expand on that? So I am macro I knew this would come back
:18:41. > :18:43.
:18:43. > :18:46.to haunt me. -- I knew this would come back to haunt me.
:18:46. > :18:50.surprised the audience in Outnumbered, so you keep them
:18:50. > :19:00.compelled. Let's see a clip. Who'd you think once the vote by our
:19:00. > :19:03.
:19:03. > :19:08.viewers for the best club from We are gathered in the bosom of
:19:08. > :19:12.Jesus to say goodbye to this mouse, killed before its time. We have
:19:12. > :19:19.given it cheese and bread for its journey to heaven, or at least if
:19:19. > :19:25.it goes to hell it will have cheese on toast. Next, the Pope. Dust to
:19:25. > :19:35.dust, for richer or for poorer, in sickness or in health. May the
:19:35. > :19:38.
:19:38. > :19:42.Force be with you, because you are worth it. Amen. Ramona, you know
:19:42. > :19:46.you make all mothers and fathers want to have more kids? That is
:19:46. > :19:52.down to you. We will have more from our favourite kids as the show goes
:19:52. > :19:56.on. Last week, I had a chat on my radio show to a lady who teaches
:19:56. > :20:02.the old grooming. We thought, can we have a go? Seriously, how hard
:20:02. > :20:08.can it be to make a dog look good? We went to see if we could cut it.
:20:08. > :20:13.And blow-dry it. In the world of DOH beauty. We are going to learn
:20:14. > :20:22.to groom some dogs and head towards a competition. We are going to
:20:22. > :20:31.paint a pooch. I am not sure I like that phrase. Meet the clients. The
:20:31. > :20:37.instructor, and the equipment. Enough larking around. Time to find
:20:37. > :20:42.out what this is all about. going to get them in the bath and
:20:42. > :20:46.wash them. The instructor took us through a crash course of how to
:20:46. > :20:53.groom dogs the professional way, and it was harder than we imagined.
:20:53. > :20:59.I am not sure about this. It is far too serious and responsible for two
:20:59. > :21:06.stupid people. Soon it was time for us to get our hands dirty. Time to
:21:06. > :21:15.wash you. There is only one shower. I am already winning. How is the
:21:15. > :21:23.temperature? He is basically drowning him. You are so well
:21:23. > :21:28.behaved. I am nearly done. I don't know if you have noticed, but I am
:21:28. > :21:36.protecting his eyes, unlike Alex, who is leaving him to fend for
:21:36. > :21:43.himself. Cheers for that! Well, not the best start, but let's get them
:21:43. > :21:50.dry. He is not enjoying himself quite as much. Well, you have
:21:50. > :21:54.finally palled, that is for sure. You are very good. My wife takes
:21:54. > :21:59.one hour to dry her hair and now I understand why that is. Do not let
:21:59. > :22:07.them feel your stress. I am stressed, I will be honest. Look at
:22:07. > :22:16.you, with your drying machine. not get a machine to do it? We
:22:16. > :22:21.thought we would chill-out. We are reading the magazine. Alex seems to
:22:21. > :22:26.have forgotten where she is. It is a bit girly to have your nails done
:22:26. > :22:35.like that. Would you like paint on your nails? Chris is finding that
:22:35. > :22:45.it is not as easy as it looks. seems to be the only dog that comes
:22:45. > :22:45.
:22:45. > :22:54.out looking worse than when he came in. Sorry. You have got the rosette.
:22:54. > :22:57.Surprise, surprise, she has won it. Yes! Welcome to the first One Show
:22:57. > :23:07.dog show. Of time for our first event, dogs who look like their
:23:07. > :23:12.
:23:12. > :23:20.Nice graphics! Ramona and Daniel, you will be judging this round. Are
:23:20. > :23:25.you ready? Let's meet the contestants. Lookalike number one,
:23:25. > :23:29.Suckey with owner Dennis. A seven- year-old miniature dachshund, who
:23:29. > :23:34.suffers from a short dog syndrome. Apparently he does not just look
:23:34. > :23:44.like his owner, but he snores like him. Let's have a look at the owner
:23:44. > :23:44.
:23:44. > :23:51.with his dog. Very good. Who is next? No. Two, Miss Totty and her
:23:51. > :23:56.owner, Susanna. This lovely lady as a dark side. She steals the balls
:23:56. > :24:00.in the park. That is the animal, not the owner. This is a two-year-
:24:00. > :24:09.old Cocker spaniel and her favourite toy is a squeaky duck.
:24:09. > :24:19.But how similar do they look? similar. Do you like the way that
:24:19. > :24:20.
:24:21. > :24:26.Susanna has co-ordinated her outfit with the dog? Yes. No. 3, Monty
:24:26. > :24:31.with owner roared. Monty is a five- year-old Labradoodle, and as he
:24:32. > :24:41.sleeps upside down you will see him in an unusual pose. Like Miss Totty,
:24:41. > :24:47.he steals balls, but how much does he look like his owner? They are
:24:47. > :24:52.exactly the same! Here is the trophy for the lookalikes. U2, go
:24:52. > :25:02.and award the trophy to the dog that looks most like its owner.
:25:02. > :25:04.
:25:04. > :25:14.Very exciting. Who will they go for? It has got to be Monty. Thank
:25:14. > :25:19.you. We look forward to round two. Here in the UK we have a long
:25:19. > :25:24.tradition of making fantastically funny films. One studio celebrating
:25:24. > :25:29.his 80th birthday made some of the greatest. Anita Rani is feeling the
:25:29. > :25:35.love for Ealing. The movies made at Ealing Studios
:25:35. > :25:40.in its heyday in the 1940s and 1950s have become a cherished part
:25:40. > :25:45.of British film history. understand you have rooms to let.
:25:45. > :25:49.It was back in 1931 that Associated talking pictures founded that
:25:49. > :25:52.studio. Although they made war films, and even a horror movie, the
:25:52. > :26:02.company and the studios became world famous for his certain brand
:26:02. > :26:04.of classic comedy. -- a certain brand. Michael Bolton took over the
:26:04. > :26:09.studios in 1938 under his leadership heralded the golden era
:26:09. > :26:13.of the Ealing comedies. Passport to Pimlico, Whisky galore, Kind Hearts
:26:13. > :26:18.and Coronets, the Lavender Hill Mob, the man in the white suit and the
:26:19. > :26:23.Lady Killers. Mark, you are working on a season about the Ealing
:26:23. > :26:27.comedies. What makes them so distinct? They have a sense of
:26:27. > :26:32.their time. There is lightness of touch, a delicate wit and something
:26:32. > :26:37.warm about them, as well as the darker strain that we love. And a
:26:37. > :26:41.real reflection of post-war Britain. Passport to Pimlico is about an
:26:41. > :26:45.escape from rationing, so the premise involves the rediscovery of
:26:45. > :26:53.long-lost papers that proved that part of London actually belongs to
:26:53. > :26:57.the Duke of Burgundy. You mean they are technically from Burgundy?
:26:57. > :27:00.There is a sense in which some of them off the change but then they
:27:00. > :27:04.welcome the status quo back. You see that when after the fantasy of
:27:04. > :27:09.being outside of rationing, they are happy to become British again.
:27:09. > :27:12.But some of them are really dark. Kind Hearts and Coronets is
:27:12. > :27:18.fabulously dock. This is the story of the young man who feels he has
:27:18. > :27:21.been cheated of his inheritance. He should have been the heir to the
:27:21. > :27:26.money and he murders his way through the family, famously all of
:27:26. > :27:30.them played by Alec Guinness. Alec Guinness is fabulous and a star of
:27:30. > :27:34.Ealing, a comedy giant at that time. The Lady Killers is a similar sort
:27:34. > :27:40.of film. We watch the villains murder each other as they are
:27:40. > :27:48.attempting to bump off this sweet monster -- this sweet old mother.
:27:48. > :27:55.And yet, strangely, we kind of want them to finish her off. I thought
:27:55. > :27:59.you might like a cup of tea. you shouldn't! There seems to be a
:27:59. > :28:04.trend of the little guy taking on the system. This was part of the
:28:05. > :28:09.way that Britain saw itself, seeing off the mighty hunt. Ealing was
:28:09. > :28:13.also a small studio battling bigger studios in Britain. You can see the
:28:14. > :28:17.underdog on so many levels. might recognise these as the
:28:17. > :28:20.entrance to the police training school in the Lavender Hill Mob,
:28:20. > :28:24.but they really lead to the Gunnersbury Park Museum, round the
:28:24. > :28:29.corner from the studios. The museum has a collection of memorabilia
:28:29. > :28:33.from the studios. What is this model? There was a gentleman who
:28:33. > :28:38.used to make models to go into the local shops to promote what ever
:28:38. > :28:41.Ealing Studios film was going to be on at the local cinema. And the art
:28:41. > :28:47.director actually gave him the original designs for Passport to
:28:47. > :28:50.Pimlico and then he made this model. They constructed entire buildings.
:28:50. > :28:56.Yes, and you can see at the back there is nothing there, just
:28:56. > :29:01.framework. And it was the framework of collaboration, under the
:29:01. > :29:04.leadership of the director, that gave the studios the identity.
:29:04. > :29:09.critics said it was an exclusive school with me as the headmaster,
:29:09. > :29:15.but at least we produced films with a definite style and with a sense
:29:15. > :29:19.of national pride, and I don't think that is happening today.
:29:19. > :29:24.even though Ealing studios are still open and working today, they
:29:24. > :29:28.are simply studios for hire. It is the old comedies that gave a unique
:29:28. > :29:34.insight into the British psyche that will remain forever in our
:29:34. > :29:41.hearts. Most exhilarating! Gyles Brandreth, you could have
:29:41. > :29:48.come from an Ealing comedy yourself. I feel I am still living in one. In
:29:48. > :29:52.my other life I am Terry-Thomas. I live in a world peopled by Alec
:29:52. > :29:56.Guinness, Margaret Rutherford. Is there a greater happiness? I think
:29:56. > :30:01.not. You are the king of the archives but you are about to be
:30:01. > :30:05.beaten. I am also about to be hooked to my TV. I am going to
:30:06. > :30:09.start watching BBC Two from Monday night for the next four weeks at
:30:09. > :30:13.6:30pm because they have something called reel to reel. Essentially
:30:13. > :30:16.what is happening is that they have dug into the British Film Institute
:30:16. > :30:21.archives and other archives and have come up with documentary
:30:22. > :30:28.features from 1900 up to 1970, E Johns before your grandparents were
:30:28. > :30:32.born. These films have been re- edited and they found people who
:30:32. > :30:36.were in the original documentaries and confronted them with their past.
:30:36. > :30:40.They found this Ministry of Technology Cinema, centred around
:30:40. > :30:47.the country and show people what they were light years ago. A great
:30:47. > :30:54.idea. For example, they have gone back to 1977, the Queen's silver
:30:54. > :30:58.jubilee. The year I was born! you get a Jubilee Cup, because if
:30:58. > :31:02.you were born on the day of the Coronation you got one. My daughter
:31:02. > :31:08.got one. It is not about your daughter and it is not about you,
:31:08. > :31:18.it is about the Queen. And also about a special beauty queen. Let
:31:18. > :31:18.
:31:18. > :31:22.me take you back to 1977 and It was a big thing. You feel like a
:31:22. > :31:26.film star. You're never going to be a film star, but that is how I felt.
:31:26. > :31:30.I can laugh, because I am embarrassed about what I look like.
:31:31. > :31:40.Thank you to whoever took that footage. I have something to show
:31:40. > :31:46.my four girls, and that is special. What a lovely film. It is called
:31:46. > :31:49.the real history of Britain, -- it is called the Reel History of
:31:49. > :31:56.Britain. It warns people up for our programme. This girl was a princess
:31:56. > :32:06.then, she is a queen now. Across 34 years, please welcome, Nicola
:32:06. > :32:06.
:32:06. > :32:16.Grossman! That can't have been you 34 years ago, it is impossible,
:32:16. > :32:17.
:32:17. > :32:22.You were the Ramona of your day. How did you feel watching that film
:32:22. > :32:26.34 years on? It is amazing, it was really emotional. I had never seen
:32:26. > :32:30.it. I remember it vividly, but when BBC rang me up and told me what
:32:30. > :32:34.they were doing, it was amazing, to think I was going to be seeing
:32:34. > :32:41.something that happened so long ago. When I saw it, it just takes you
:32:41. > :32:46.back. It was an amazing thing to have happened. You had duties, you
:32:46. > :32:51.open a park bench. I did, I kicked off a football match in high heels
:32:51. > :32:55.as well. And we had a float and a fade, and the vicar, and the whole
:32:55. > :33:02.of the village was left. It was great, it was fabulous. It is great
:33:02. > :33:09.to see it will now. This show is going to be a massive hit. It is
:33:09. > :33:14.very touching, real stories going back to the First World War. Bury a
:33:14. > :33:17.lovely. Let's celebrate another unsung hero. There are loads of hit
:33:17. > :33:22.songs with memorable solos and often that people would play them
:33:22. > :33:25.don't get any credit whatsoever. It is our job to put them right and we
:33:25. > :33:30.have met everyone from the Mull of Kintyre piper to the She's Leaving
:33:30. > :33:34.Home Harper's. Tonight, the harmonica hero who helped Karma
:33:34. > :33:39.Chameleon conquer the charts -- harpist.
:33:39. > :33:45.Once upon a time this Mississippi steamer played an important part in
:33:45. > :33:51.pop history. It is 1983 and Culture Club are at number one again with
:33:51. > :33:56.the incredibly catchy calmer chameleon.
:33:56. > :34:00.# Karma Chameleon. # You come and go. What makes Karma
:34:00. > :34:05.Chameleon stick in your brain? That harmonica. It wasn't Boy George
:34:05. > :34:11.playing it on the recording, or any other member of the ban. It was
:34:11. > :34:15.session musician died Llandough. I am glad to say that 28 years on,
:34:15. > :34:25.the Southern belle is still doing a roaring trade, ferrying tourists up
:34:25. > :34:28.
:34:28. > :34:34.and down the Thames, and Judd is It was 1983, the height of the New
:34:34. > :34:39.Romantics, were you a new romantic? It is quite bizarre. I was an
:34:39. > :34:45.executive at CBS Records, when the record was done. I had been a
:34:45. > :34:49.session musician before the record company job. Steve Levine who was
:34:49. > :34:52.producing culture club's album, he called me out of the blue, asking
:34:52. > :34:56.me to create a line because there was a big hole at the beginning of
:34:56. > :35:02.the track. It was trying to create something odd but something that
:35:02. > :35:09.made a statement. This is the harm on a car used on the record. I just
:35:09. > :35:19.need to worship. I will give you an example. -- the harmonica used on
:35:19. > :35:19.
:35:19. > :35:24.It is your harmonica that makes it sound so sudden. -- Southern. What
:35:24. > :35:28.was the recording session like? was quite an uneventful think what
:35:28. > :35:34.I would take my lunch time out from the executive job to - down the
:35:34. > :35:39.studio. I had an idea to create something as a power statement.
:35:39. > :35:46.many takes did it take? Only a couple. With the harmonica that I
:35:46. > :35:56.used, it is in E flat. I created a little country like with a loop on
:35:56. > :36:04.
:36:04. > :36:08.It is that by brighter at the end Judge had hit the right note. His
:36:08. > :36:14.distinctive sound lifted the track and made it instantly recognisable.
:36:14. > :36:17.Karma Chameleon was the biggest hit of 1983, staying at number one for
:36:17. > :36:22.six weeks. # I am a man without conviction.
:36:22. > :36:26.Apart from George, you are the star of that song. I wasn't really the
:36:26. > :36:30.start of the song, I was just a hired hand. How does it feel when
:36:30. > :36:35.somebody else is miming to your parred? It annoys me, because I
:36:35. > :36:40.know it is me who played the track. -- to your party. They invited me
:36:40. > :36:44.to play at Wembley, and the guys were really nice. It was an
:36:44. > :36:48.interlude of fun, and I went back to the real world. Did it make you
:36:48. > :36:54.lots of money? A little. I got a fee. I think at the time it was
:36:54. > :36:58.something like �70. Every time it gets played, I get a tiny bit. I
:36:58. > :37:04.could have done with a little bit more. This song is still played so
:37:04. > :37:11.much. In 2011, if it comes on the radio now, what are you thinking?
:37:11. > :37:15.It is one of pride, satisfaction. I think, I created that, that is me.
:37:15. > :37:25.And it is something for the kids so that when I am getting buried, as
:37:25. > :37:30.
:37:30. > :37:40.the coffin goes along, you will # Is it loving in your eyes...
:37:40. > :37:43.
:37:43. > :37:51.OK, time for our One Show dog show Three contenders. Which one has the
:37:51. > :37:56.waggiest tail? Number one, please welcome Bubble. With her owner, and
:37:56. > :38:01.Lottie. Bubble is a 2-year-old Dalmatian from Sheffield who was
:38:01. > :38:11.born deaf. She even wax when she goes to see the vet, and she loves
:38:11. > :38:15.
:38:15. > :38:22.What about wagger number two? is Max with Kevin. Max is a 4-year-
:38:22. > :38:26.old Jack Russell. He wagged so much it shakes his whole backside. He
:38:26. > :38:34.likes adventures like hiking in the Alps and has been caving with
:38:35. > :38:40.Kevin's daughter. What about the last wagger? Please welcome Megan,
:38:40. > :38:45.with owner, Chloe. Megan is a 14 months old Cocker spaniel from
:38:45. > :38:50.Horsham, whose family has a history of over wagging. The big brother,
:38:50. > :38:57.Henry, wax so much that he hit his tail against a door frame and had
:38:57. > :39:02.to be hospitalised. Don't worry, he is better now. Brilliant. We need
:39:02. > :39:12.three people to count the wax. He could we ask? What about the kids
:39:12. > :39:35.
:39:35. > :39:42.You have one stock and one own age. We had a big meeting about this.
:39:42. > :39:52.This is a wag... Sorry, you're absolutely right. 30 seconds on the
:39:52. > :39:55.
:39:55. > :40:05.clock, start wagging. Looking good with the old dhow nation. Megan was
:40:05. > :40:10.
:40:10. > :40:20.good in rehearsal -- the old 10 seconds left. Max looks tired.
:40:20. > :40:35.
:40:35. > :40:45.These stocks have been wagging all Megan, come forward. How many did
:40:45. > :40:59.
:40:59. > :41:06.What do you think, Tyger? I counted 84. Are you sure? Daniel, how many
:41:06. > :41:11.did you count? I counted about the same as Tyger, about 84.
:41:11. > :41:15.weren't even concentrating! There seems to be something wrong. It is
:41:15. > :41:25.a draw. It is declared a draw because none of us really know what
:41:25. > :41:26.
:41:26. > :41:32.we are doing, but we are having It is the final round soon. Dogs
:41:32. > :41:36.that are one of a kind. The stars of Outnumbered are here, because a
:41:36. > :41:43.brand new series starts later at 9pm on BBC One. Here is a sneak
:41:43. > :41:51.peek. It is always going up or down. We should go back to the old days
:41:51. > :41:56.where we used livestock for money. What happens when you would like to
:41:57. > :42:04.buy a chicken? You buy a chicken with chickens for but how much is a
:42:04. > :42:09.chicken worth in chickens? How do you get change from a chicken?
:42:09. > :42:12.-- eggs. You improvise, there are writers but you are allowed to
:42:12. > :42:17.improvise. Was that line about the change from the chicken improvised
:42:17. > :42:23.or written? I can't remember, I presume that would have been
:42:23. > :42:28.improvised because that was an improvised section. The thing is
:42:29. > :42:34.loosely scripted. When it is scripted, we can edit it with our
:42:34. > :42:39.own words. There are actual sections, discussions and arguments,
:42:39. > :42:43.where it is all improvised. It is labelled improvised on the script.
:42:43. > :42:48.Do the writers get jealous that you are funnier than they are? I think
:42:48. > :42:52.they pass it off as their own staff! You are going into the 4th
:42:52. > :43:00.series tonight. The characters have changed, because you started when
:43:00. > :43:06.you were six, and you are now... 10? Yes. What it is like when
:43:06. > :43:15.you're looking back? Is it a bit embarrassing? I think it doesn't
:43:15. > :43:19.really seem like me, it seems like it is hard to believe I was only
:43:19. > :43:28.five because I look at people I know who are five, and I would have
:43:28. > :43:38.been just starting school. It seems weird. Who is the funniest out of
:43:38. > :43:47.you three? Not me. I do stupid In different ways. Tonight is about
:43:47. > :43:51.death, gay Uncle Bob dies. He died a while ago. Your dad has got to do
:43:51. > :43:55.the eulogy. Why do you want to go to the funeral? I don't know, Ben
:43:55. > :44:02.doesn't have strong feelings about it. In Ben, he wants to see a dead
:44:02. > :44:07.body burnt. Ramona, you want to go and you were a pretty dress and
:44:07. > :44:14.caused controversy? Yes, my mum tells me it is a celebration, so I
:44:14. > :44:20.were some fancy dress and she is a bit stuck. You say, why do I have
:44:20. > :44:29.to wear black? I think it is brilliant. Are you hungry? Sort of.
:44:29. > :44:32.Just say yes. Yes. We are going to meet Jay Rayner. Tonight I am
:44:32. > :44:42.looking for absolutely culinary perfection. Crispy, greasy, smoky
:44:42. > :44:46.or streaky, what makes the greatest My name is Jay and I am addicted to
:44:46. > :44:51.pork. There is no savoury dish that cannot be improved by the addition
:44:51. > :44:57.of a bitter of pig. No wonder our favourite comfort food is the bacon
:44:57. > :45:00.sandwich. There is many a lapsed vegetarian who will admit that
:45:00. > :45:04.nothing lures them from the straight and narrow like the
:45:04. > :45:12.savoury smell of bacon. But for a devoted connoisseur like me, it
:45:12. > :45:15.cannot be any old bacon. It has to be just right. So what makes the
:45:15. > :45:20.perfect bacon butty? Good ingredients are a must. For
:45:20. > :45:23.centuries, British households made their own bacon, curing a
:45:23. > :45:26.slaughtered animal with salt and if they wanted it smoked they would
:45:26. > :45:31.hang it in the chimney. It is more high-tech now, but that is still
:45:31. > :45:35.the method they use at this award- winning butcher's near Taunton.
:45:35. > :45:42.Back bacon comes from the line. Streaky bacon comes from the belly
:45:42. > :45:46.pork, the underside. How do we go from here to bacon? We take the
:45:46. > :45:50.burn-out, and then we dry cure it. That basically means rubbing salt
:45:50. > :45:55.into the flesh, leaving it for a period of time and then hanging it
:45:55. > :46:00.to dry and putting it on the slicer, straight into the frying pan.
:46:01. > :46:04.you think they can should have a lot of that? Without question. A
:46:04. > :46:09.body like mine takes training. You need some fat. These pigs have a
:46:09. > :46:14.layer of fat and that is where the flavour comes from. Tender pork,
:46:14. > :46:17.tender bacon. You pick up cheap bacon and it says, with added water.
:46:17. > :46:21.All that you are buying is expensive water and it releases
:46:21. > :46:27.during cooking, which is why you get water in the griddle. Is there
:46:27. > :46:32.ever a good reason for adding water to bacon? If you are an accountant.
:46:32. > :46:41.We all have an idea of what makes the perfect sandwich. Marco Pierre
:46:41. > :46:48.White thinks the best way to cook bacon is in the microwave. This is
:46:48. > :46:52.a crime against bacon. Researchers at Leeds University were even paid
:46:52. > :46:56.by a bacon manufacturer to come up with a formula for the perfect
:46:56. > :47:01.bacon butty. It took account of all sorts of variables like bacon type,
:47:02. > :47:07.cooking method and what source you use. Toppled the pile, back bacon,
:47:07. > :47:11.not too fatty, crisply grilled at 240 degrees Celsius, between thick
:47:11. > :47:16.slices of white bread. It does go on a bit. The texture and crunch
:47:16. > :47:24.were just as important as taste and smell. Now, I might not be a boffin,
:47:24. > :47:31.might not be good at maths, but I do know what I like. And so does
:47:31. > :47:35.Steve Nieve, a former patrolman of the year. Before the possession, he
:47:35. > :47:39.got to travel the country sampling bacon butties and declaring a
:47:39. > :47:45.winner. His company no longer offers that perk, but the patrolman
:47:45. > :47:50.still run on the bacon butty. What makes the perfect bacon sandwich?
:47:50. > :47:54.Crispy bacon, no fat... Hang on, bacon with no fat! That is like the
:47:54. > :48:01.Pope without praying, claiming you are a little bit pregnant. It is
:48:01. > :48:08.not really bacon. I just prefer the taste. So it is about the crunch of
:48:08. > :48:12.the bacon between the soft quilt of the bread. Definitely. Perhaps the
:48:12. > :48:17.perfect bacon sandwich, like the Holy Grail, is always out of reach.
:48:17. > :48:21.My perfect sandwich, toasted on one side, tomato ketchup, bacon well
:48:21. > :48:25.done and a smear of butter. It may not be your perfect bacon sandwich,
:48:25. > :48:31.but whatever it is, the bacon sandwich is still, for me, a
:48:31. > :48:35.national treasure and one that I could not do without.
:48:35. > :48:41.Who is not hungry after watching that? By the way, it should be the
:48:41. > :48:50.law that all butchers should have to look like Malcolm. He is the
:48:50. > :48:59.perfect butcher, isn't he? We do not even hire him. Usually we would
:48:59. > :49:03.ask the first question but Daniel has a question for you? Why did you
:49:03. > :49:07.make us eat those sandwiches? needed someone to try them and we
:49:07. > :49:14.thought you would like it. Let's look at what happened. These are
:49:14. > :49:19.your strange sandwiches, tested by the kids. First, Tracey Wright with
:49:19. > :49:25.banana and flake on cheap white bread with margarine. What is not
:49:25. > :49:29.to like. It is just Banana and bread. Next, salad cream and
:49:29. > :49:35.beetroot with cold baked beans. They thought it was torture, and so
:49:35. > :49:41.did I. Ramona did not even feel the need to try it. Finally, the triple
:49:41. > :49:47.Decker with peanut butter and Banana and courage chicken. What is
:49:47. > :49:54.wrong with you people? Daniel did nothing very much of it. So, that
:49:54. > :49:59.went down well and came up again even quicker! Very brave. You are
:49:59. > :50:08.very good to have tried them. This was the winner, the Banana and
:50:08. > :50:12.flake. That sounds really nice. Was it nice? It was OK. The the Banana
:50:12. > :50:22.was... You could not really taste the flake, it was just squishy
:50:22. > :50:23.
:50:23. > :50:29.Banana. We have had lots of messages every week asking how big
:50:29. > :50:34.are Jay's plums and will he ever bring them in. You could not resist.
:50:34. > :50:37.I am just moving on. British plums are brilliant and we have loads of
:50:38. > :50:42.them but British supermarkets are not stocking them. They are buying
:50:42. > :50:46.them from abroad and doing enormous damage to our domestic plumbing
:50:46. > :50:50.industry it. Go into the supermarket and demand British
:50:50. > :50:58.plums. We have wonderful varieties. And we have a pudding here which is
:50:58. > :51:02.quite nice. It is a clafoutis of plums, which is plums in a kind of
:51:02. > :51:12.batter with a lot of sugar, to make up for feeding you beetroot
:51:12. > :51:21.
:51:21. > :51:26.sandwiches. There is no cream. Revenge! Marks out of 10, Ramona?
:51:26. > :51:31.Seven. The final round of the One Show dog show, unique dogs coming
:51:31. > :51:37.up next. First, time for Detective Dan to dive deep into late history
:51:37. > :51:41.mystery under the high seas. The Thames estuary, for 2000 years
:51:41. > :51:45.one of the busiest shipping lanes in Britain. But beneath the waves,
:51:45. > :51:52.sunk into the silt, a graveyard strewn with shipwrecks and the
:51:52. > :51:57.bones of the men who sailed in them. In 1665, HMS London left her birth
:51:57. > :52:00.here at Chatham dock and sailed down river. She was the flagship of
:52:00. > :52:05.Charles the second's Navy, bristling with cannon, ready to
:52:05. > :52:10.take on the Dutch. But just a few miles into the Thames estuary, an
:52:10. > :52:18.explosion tore apart the whole. 300 of her crew sank with her beneath
:52:18. > :52:21.the waves. The HMS London was prepared for war, her magazines
:52:21. > :52:26.tough -- stuffed with tons of gunpowder. It must have been a
:52:26. > :52:30.terrific blast. Little wonder there were so few survivors. News of the
:52:30. > :52:34.explosion reached Samuel Pepys and he wrote in his diary that just the
:52:34. > :52:37.stern section of the ship had stuck out of the water and 25 desperate
:52:37. > :52:42.survivors had been clinging to it. Samuel Pepys makes clear that one
:52:43. > :52:46.of those rescued was not a sailor. Regulations stated that only crew
:52:46. > :52:51.members were allowed on Navy vessels, so who was the stowaway
:52:51. > :52:55.and why were they there? Today, I am joining marine archaeologist
:52:55. > :53:00.Graham Scott and his team. We are going to dive the wreck of the HMS
:53:00. > :53:03.London in the hope that they may be able to help me solve the mystery.
:53:03. > :53:09.The Thames estuary is an aggressive piece of water. Is this wreck under
:53:09. > :53:17.threat? It is not a stable site, so we can expected to deteriorate,
:53:17. > :53:21.which is why doing archaeology now is important. Checked and tested.
:53:21. > :53:25.In a very tidal river estuary there are only certain times of day when
:53:25. > :53:35.you can dive. There is a lot of wind coming in later. We are up
:53:35. > :53:37.
:53:37. > :53:41.It is sobering to think that these murky waters are the resting-place
:53:41. > :53:46.of over 300 souls. Unfortunately conditions today are too
:53:46. > :53:52.challenging to be able to retrieve any artifacts from the site. That
:53:53. > :53:56.is amazing. You can clearly make out the timbers of the 17th century
:53:56. > :54:01.wreck, an incredible piece of iron work as well. But the visibility
:54:01. > :54:04.was terrible. Graham has brought along one of the finds from last
:54:04. > :54:09.year that will hopefully shed some light on this mysterious passenger.
:54:09. > :54:13.What have you found? We found the structure of the ship itself, part
:54:13. > :54:17.of the ship itself, and we are also finding lots of small artifacts
:54:17. > :54:25.that tell us about life on board the ship and who was on board the
:54:25. > :54:31.ship as well. Is that what I think it is? Yes. It is a skull. It is
:54:31. > :54:38.the major part of a skull, the cranium. Is it possible to tell if
:54:38. > :54:43.it is a man or a woman? No, the bones experts tell us that it is in
:54:43. > :54:48.fact a woman. Women were not allowed aboard Royal Navy ships, so
:54:48. > :54:52.what were these ladies doing on HMS London? David Davies and Richard
:54:52. > :54:57.Endsor are experts in 17th century naval history. I was pretty
:54:57. > :55:01.surprised to find women on board this 17th century ship. Is that a
:55:01. > :55:06.shock to you? It seems surprising to people now, but it seems to have
:55:06. > :55:10.been common in the 17th century navy. Women generally did go to the
:55:10. > :55:14.sea at the start of the voyage for the first few nights. So the
:55:14. > :55:18.sailors could say goodbye to their wives and girlfriends. That sounds
:55:18. > :55:23.quite relaxed. Well, wives, girlfriends and perhaps other
:55:23. > :55:26.female acquaintances. Yes, and in many respects the discipline of the
:55:26. > :55:32.17th century navy was much more lenient than it became in later
:55:32. > :55:35.years. You think of them, Richard, as preservers of manliness. The
:55:35. > :55:39.guys would go out to sea and not see their wives and sweethearts
:55:39. > :55:42.four months. You would not have found women on the pay books, you
:55:42. > :55:48.would not have found their names, but they undoubtedly got on board
:55:48. > :55:54.the ships under an assumed name, a man's name. How many there were, we
:55:54. > :55:57.do not know. I hope the men did not get too distracted from their duty.
:55:57. > :56:01.Slowly the Thames is starting to give up the secrets hidden for so
:56:01. > :56:05.long on its river bed. The wreck of London, with the bones of the men
:56:05. > :56:15.and the women who died on her is just one of the extraordinary tales
:56:15. > :56:21.lying beneath its murky waters. What is going on with his hair? A
:56:21. > :56:24.bit curly. It is what goes on with their hair. Time for the final
:56:24. > :56:27.round of the One Show dog show and we are celebrating the dogs that
:56:28. > :56:32.have something special about them, that probably never win anything at
:56:32. > :56:42.a proper show, but the owners love them just the same. They are one of
:56:42. > :56:52.
:56:53. > :56:56.a kind. We have three contestants. First up, Lola, who likes to fall
:56:56. > :57:06.asleep in front of the BBC Ten O'Clock News. We are sure they will
:57:06. > :57:08.
:57:08. > :57:12.be thrilled. Next, Alfie, with its owner, Sam. This is a two year olds
:57:12. > :57:22.terrier who has long eyelashes and loves to dress up, especially as
:57:22. > :57:25.
:57:25. > :57:28.Batman. Finally, Sidley with owner, Jenny. Sydney is a one-and-a-half
:57:28. > :57:34.year-old Chinese crested dog who likes to have his tongue sticking
:57:34. > :57:39.out for most of the day. That is generally it. There we go, the
:57:39. > :57:49.tongue is officially out. Who is the one of a kind one showed will
:57:49. > :57:51.
:57:51. > :58:01.win her 2011? Tyger, you are going to judge this. You have the trophy.
:58:01. > :58:03.
:58:03. > :58:09.Sidley, with Jenny, I think. Thank you. Let's get all of them together.
:58:09. > :58:13.We are going to sing We Are the World, in the style of dogs. That
:58:13. > :58:19.is all for tonight. Thank you to Ramona, Daniel and Tyger.