:00:18. > :00:19.Hello and welcome to The One Show with Matt Baker...
:00:20. > :00:30.And, sitting on our sofa, someone who doesn't think we should
:00:31. > :00:33.Judging by past performances, there's no way that tonight's guest
:00:34. > :00:48.will be anything other than gloriously, absurdly silly...
:00:49. > :00:56.Lets get on with the show. He is creepy. It is sausage clock.
:00:57. > :01:13.I had never seen any of that because I was in it. It was funny with Gary
:01:14. > :01:20.and Lord Sugar. He loved every minute of that! This is your tenth
:01:21. > :01:25.appearance on the show. There must be a prize! Unfortunately no
:01:26. > :01:34.sausages involved. But you have brought this button. I will go along
:01:35. > :01:45.with the charade! You asked us to get it, carry on. It is not for Red
:01:46. > :01:50.Nose Day, this is what I use on my new ITV show Alien Fun Capsule. The
:01:51. > :01:54.idea is if I see something funny I press the button and it is
:01:55. > :02:00.transferred into the alien Bob Capshaw. I was asked by a world
:02:01. > :02:05.government sometime ago -- Alien Fun Capsule. To collect all the funniest
:02:06. > :02:09.stuff I could find to put it into a capsule in case we are invaded by
:02:10. > :02:15.Lian and then I could show them that we are fun to hang out with. That is
:02:16. > :02:22.the concept of the show, I admit it is wafer thin. We like it! So thin
:02:23. > :02:26.that you could smoke it. We thought we would recreate it tonight.
:02:27. > :02:32.Anything you find funny that could go into the Fun Capsule just pressed
:02:33. > :02:43.the buzzer at any point in time. I love the idea. Do something funny!
:02:44. > :02:48.Do not put me on the spot! It should be spontaneous. Well hopefully
:02:49. > :02:54.people at home will not be pressing any buttons and staying with us.
:02:55. > :02:59.More interesting than funny. You just get settled in.
:03:00. > :03:03.Buying and moving into a new home is a stressful time -
:03:04. > :03:07.mortgages, solicitors, surveys, moving vans and the rest.
:03:08. > :03:09.So you might think a brand-spanking new-build property
:03:10. > :03:31.Probably heard the UK is in the middle of a housing crisis with the
:03:32. > :03:32.government claiming 1 million new homes must be built by 2020. But
:03:33. > :03:38.some people say the push to build new homes in quantity is resulting
:03:39. > :03:42.in a drop in quality. Last month one of the U:K.'s biggest house-builders
:03:43. > :03:47.Bovis Homes announced it was setting aside ?7 million to fix problems
:03:48. > :03:50.with some of its homes. The people that own the homes are so angry
:03:51. > :03:55.about their shoddily built dwellings that they have done what angry
:03:56. > :04:00.people do these days. They started a Facebook group.
:04:01. > :04:04.Almost 3000 customers have been posting complaints about cracked
:04:05. > :04:12.roofs, damp ceilings and even wonky walls. Danny Moffat is one of the
:04:13. > :04:18.Facebook campaigners. In 2014 the former Royal Marine bought his
:04:19. > :04:22.?600,000 home in Surrey. We ploughed all of my pension from the Royal
:04:23. > :04:27.Marines into this home. It was supposed to be the forever home, all
:04:28. > :04:31.the extras included and unfortunately they have been a lot
:04:32. > :04:35.of extras we were not including. Most new bills come with a snagging
:04:36. > :04:40.list, an inventory of jobs that the builder must come back to fix. In
:04:41. > :04:46.the case of Danny is less of a list and more a catalogue of disaster.
:04:47. > :04:52.We probably identified 1000 snags. As you go into the master bedroom
:04:53. > :04:55.the floor sinks to the centre. The downstairs toilet was blocked. They
:04:56. > :04:59.realised the pipe was the wrong size and that led to the back wall being
:05:00. > :05:05.damp and the whole dining room floor had to be taken up. It is a bit like
:05:06. > :05:11.everyday is a school day every day is a snagging day when you buy a
:05:12. > :05:16.Bovis Home. Stewart from Bedford also bought his Bovis Home in 2014
:05:17. > :05:21.but for the past three years his biggest problem has been keeping out
:05:22. > :05:26.the cold. Talk to me about the practicalities of living here. Even
:05:27. > :05:30.with the heating on and radiators blazing we have like a Siberian wind
:05:31. > :05:34.blowing across the floor. If we are sitting here doing anything we have
:05:35. > :05:40.to wear a thick jumper and thermal socks. Stewart complained to Bovis
:05:41. > :05:45.Homes but it fell on deaf ears so he shelled out for a thermal imaging
:05:46. > :05:49.survey of his home. Everything should be roughly the same orange
:05:50. > :05:54.colour and you can see in every corner of every room there is some
:05:55. > :05:59.area of missing installation. In a statement a spokesperson for Bovis
:06:00. > :06:04.Homes said that the firm recognised that there had been customer service
:06:05. > :06:07.issues at some locations. They said they are changing as a business,
:06:08. > :06:12.slowing overall building rates. They had while the majority of customers
:06:13. > :06:15.are happy, they're committed to making things right by homeowners
:06:16. > :06:20.who have reported issues to them. But when it comes to house-builders
:06:21. > :06:33.it is not just Bovis Homes who are letting customers down. Paul Higgins
:06:34. > :06:50.is chief executive at the homeowners Alliance. There is some great
:06:51. > :06:51.house-builders are out there who are selling to customers for life and
:06:52. > :06:53.they take part in the work and want to get things done but sadly other
:06:54. > :06:53.house-builders who at the expense of quantity, quality is Bing, mice.
:06:54. > :06:54.There is a lack of consumer protection buying a new home. When
:06:55. > :06:55.you buy a new car you can return it but you cannot return home. The
:06:56. > :06:55.government has set a target of new homes that must be built by 2020.
:06:56. > :07:00.But what is it doing to protect people moving into those homes.
:07:01. > :07:02.Oliver Caldwell MP chairs and All Party Parliamentary Group on Iran
:07:03. > :07:07.bill. Last year he commissioned a report calling for house-builders to
:07:08. > :07:12.be held to account. You recommended an ombudsman for new homes back in
:07:13. > :07:15.July last year and we have not got one. The government has got to look
:07:16. > :07:20.at it as to whether or not that is except a way of going for. We will
:07:21. > :07:24.hope we will have a response in the autumn or by the end of the year
:07:25. > :07:28.certainly. So Bovis Homes have committed ?7 million nationwide,
:07:29. > :07:33.what can you do to make sure that they fulfil their commitment and put
:07:34. > :07:36.things right? I think it is an indication they realised there is an
:07:37. > :07:40.issue and they've got to do something about it. We had to make
:07:41. > :07:46.sure there is legislation and strictures in place which are going
:07:47. > :07:51.to deliver good quality builds. So Oliver thinks it is time for some
:07:52. > :07:55.action. A bit worrying then that is made of American government have not
:07:56. > :07:59.included his ideas in their big housing plan. Of course none of this
:08:00. > :08:03.will come as any comfort to you if you are currently sitting in a
:08:04. > :08:09.lounge of your new-build home with the breeze coming in under the
:08:10. > :08:15.skirting boards. Watching television with Harry Hill
:08:16. > :08:21.is like watching television with the constant running commentary! I'm
:08:22. > :08:28.still making TV Burp but just for the kids and family at home! We all
:08:29. > :08:34.shout at the telly. Let's talk about this Alien Fun Capsule. Bagging all
:08:35. > :08:38.the things that could potentially delight aliens, anything funny. But
:08:39. > :08:46.it is an interesting concept. If aliens were watching British
:08:47. > :08:53.television right now, what do you think they would be thinking, would
:08:54. > :08:58.they be enjoying it? I think they would be putting the One Show into
:08:59. > :09:05.their Fun Capsule. There's a lot of strange stuff on at the moment on
:09:06. > :09:11.TV. My family, I have three girls, they loved to watch don't tell the
:09:12. > :09:17.bride and say yes to the dress. You have a guy arranging the wedding and
:09:18. > :09:22.the girl saying oh no, what has he done! But you agree to be part of
:09:23. > :09:26.the show! It should not be complete surprise that he organised the whole
:09:27. > :09:30.thing in an Indian takeaway! But as you said, with the aliens, they
:09:31. > :09:40.would be watching from light years away. So it would be very old
:09:41. > :09:48.programmes. You different guests each week. It is a panel show.
:09:49. > :09:53.Basically I pitched the show to ITV and had various ideas but they said
:09:54. > :09:58.we would like a panel show. ITV does not really have a panel show. I have
:09:59. > :10:06.never even been on one let alone be the host and I do not particularly
:10:07. > :10:13.like them! So I have the panel. And what do you ask them? Well, not
:10:14. > :10:16.much! The idea originally was they would come in with funny stuff but
:10:17. > :10:22.it ended up with me just showing them stuff and as all laughing. But
:10:23. > :10:27.a lot of it is me taking the Mickey. Judith Chalmers was on the show, the
:10:28. > :10:43.veteran broadcaster of course. Let's just have a look. Here we go.
:10:44. > :11:02.Wish you were here! Hello, Judith, I wish you were here! Not in a bad
:11:03. > :11:08.way. I was just making a comment about the theme of Judith and her
:11:09. > :11:16.show. It's came across as you taking an instant dislike! I love it! We
:11:17. > :11:23.need a trumpet. It took a long time to learn that. Months of rehearsal.
:11:24. > :11:28.You also have regular rounds. One of them involves local news headlines.
:11:29. > :11:35.We've got our audience in tonight to help us explain. So when you're
:11:36. > :11:41.ready a bit of music and off you go. Large lorry negotiates tight bend.
:11:42. > :11:50.Comfortable mother in custard shortage. I'm not dead says
:11:51. > :12:00.grandmother. Early customers find booths closed. New footbath gate is
:12:01. > :12:08.too noisy. Thank you very much. So where did this start? Local news
:12:09. > :12:12.round-up is what we think. You see these headlines on boards outside
:12:13. > :12:18.newsagents. So we went to get as many as we could. I think we do for
:12:19. > :12:24.five each week. And they're all true. Those are true. Completely
:12:25. > :12:35.real stories. Do you have a favourite? I do like the custard
:12:36. > :12:37.story. With double mother in custard shortage. I'm a big fan but stubble.
:12:38. > :12:40.That could go in Fun Capsule. Let's stick with it.
:12:41. > :12:44.Harry Hill's Alien Fun Capsule continues Thursday, 8.30pm, ITV.
:12:45. > :12:48."Stressed dog goes grey" could easily be another
:12:49. > :12:51.funny headline on Harry's local news round-up.
:12:52. > :12:54.But according to a new study, it's a real, serious and widespread
:12:55. > :12:56.problem for many dogs and their owners.
:12:57. > :13:11.Silver hairs, many of us discover them sooner than we would like.
:13:12. > :13:15.Normally the hallmark of age and maturity is often said also to be
:13:16. > :13:21.the tell-tale sign of stress. Could high-pressure jobs be to blame? We
:13:22. > :13:25.do know premature greying can be caused by genetics, disease and
:13:26. > :13:29.damage to the skin. But surprisingly there is little evidence that stress
:13:30. > :13:38.or anxiety gives us silver hairs. The science is still a bit of a grey
:13:39. > :13:42.area. So we were intrigued to hear about a
:13:43. > :13:47.study that claim to find the connection not with humans but in
:13:48. > :13:50.dogs. New research carried out by a group
:13:51. > :13:56.of universities in the USA found that there could be a link between
:13:57. > :14:02.dogs with prematurely grey fur and anxiety. Using a sample of 400 young
:14:03. > :14:06.dogs aged under four years old researchers took photographs of
:14:07. > :14:14.their mothers. The dogs were rated on a silver scale from no grey fur
:14:15. > :14:20.to a full grey nose. The study found the more likely the dog was to be
:14:21. > :14:25.nervous or show impulsive behaviour the more grey hairs they had. To
:14:26. > :14:31.find out what can make dogs anxious I meeting with behaviourist and
:14:32. > :14:38.trainer Louise and her dog Fred. Hello, Fred how you doing. I noticed
:14:39. > :14:44.he has some grey in his muscle. You must be interested in the study. It
:14:45. > :14:49.is fascinating, dogs can go grey because of genetics and more breeds
:14:50. > :14:52.are more prone to it. I've noticed a lot of younger rescued dogs that
:14:53. > :14:58.looked older than their years. Fred is a good example. He's just five
:14:59. > :15:02.years old. I took on last year. He had grave error before we got him.
:15:03. > :15:06.And you believe it be stressed related. I think there could be a
:15:07. > :15:11.link because he had a rocky start to life. You would not imagine a dog
:15:12. > :15:18.like this, a great Dane, to be nervous. He gets anxious? I would
:15:19. > :15:21.say he definitely arrived with some kind of anxious tendencies. We're
:15:22. > :15:26.working on that. Let's take for a walk.
:15:27. > :15:37.For Fred a city walk like this can be stressful. Traffic.
:15:38. > :15:40.Strangers. And children shouting all put him on
:15:41. > :15:45.edge. But for Louise this is only part of
:15:46. > :15:53.the story. There are other subtler signs of stress to look out for. It
:15:54. > :15:58.can be yawning. Lip licking. You can get ears going back, the tail
:15:59. > :16:00.underneath. You can find some dogs will do displacement activity, so
:16:01. > :16:04.they can be going towards something and start sniffing the ground as a
:16:05. > :16:08.way of avoiding things. There's a lot of things but it's about putting
:16:09. > :16:13.them all together. Louise is gradually training Fred to cope. She
:16:14. > :16:17.keeps an eye on his subtle cues and posture. If something makes him
:16:18. > :16:21.nervous she uses a command to tell him they're changing direction. In
:16:22. > :16:25.this way, Fred has learned to trust Louise and stay calm even when
:16:26. > :16:30.something worries him. I think it's about not forcing them into a
:16:31. > :16:33.situation. I never wanted to push him into something, I never wanted
:16:34. > :16:37.to make him do something. Understanding a dog's stress signs
:16:38. > :16:42.and what causes them can help owners build their dog's confidence and
:16:43. > :16:46.ultimately reduce anxiety. There's still lots more research to
:16:47. > :16:49.be done but understanding what changes the hair colour in dogs
:16:50. > :16:53.could one day help us understand what makes us go grey. In the
:16:54. > :16:57.meantime, recognising those signs of anxiety in our four-legged friends
:16:58. > :17:03.and knowing how to keep them happy could only be a good thing.
:17:04. > :17:08.Good boy! Well, thanks, Patrick. As you can
:17:09. > :17:12.see, Fred is now here on The One Show. Live, he continues to make
:17:13. > :17:17.great progress overcoming his nerves. Louise who we saw in the
:17:18. > :17:22.film feels this is the right time for him to make his debut on live
:17:23. > :17:26.television. He is incredibly relaxed. How has it gone getting him
:17:27. > :17:29.here? He's done well. We had time to familiarise himself with the studio,
:17:30. > :17:36.that was part of it, getting used to it, knowing he would be all right to
:17:37. > :17:45.come in. No stage fright at all. I wish I had done the same thing! He
:17:46. > :17:53.has a new friend. He does. He has make a first dog friend, a dog
:17:54. > :17:57.called Crocus. What do they do? They go out for walks. Of course. When
:17:58. > :18:03.one sniffs the other one does, when one stops the other stops. A bit of
:18:04. > :18:09.running around together. Listen, Harry, we know you love sausages and
:18:10. > :18:13.you love dogs. We have a great opportunity if you want to take this
:18:14. > :18:25.opportunity, you can potentially feed Fred. Open wide, Louise! Sorry,
:18:26. > :18:33.the dog. Not me. Fred, do you want a sausage, come on, Fred! He is a
:18:34. > :18:37.gentle giant. Thank you to you both. Come and see us again, Fred, keep us
:18:38. > :18:43.updated with the progress and how it's going. All right. Dave, we need
:18:44. > :18:46.more sausages! Get the frying pan on. Now Red Nose
:18:47. > :18:50.Day is fast approaching and it's time to get involved. We are not
:18:51. > :18:56.asking for money today, though. We need your laughs. Giggles, chuckles
:18:57. > :18:58.and chortles. Details will be along shortly. First, here is some
:18:59. > :19:37.hilarious inspiration. # Come up and see me, make me
:19:38. > :19:41.smile... It's so infectious. Can you compete with that lot? Comic Relief
:19:42. > :19:44.want to celebrate Britain's best laugh, if you or someone you know
:19:45. > :19:48.has a brilliant laugh film it on your phone and make sure it is this
:19:49. > :19:53.way, please. Landscape. Not this way, portrait. Yes, please send in a
:19:54. > :19:56.quick video to our usual address. We will show some of our favourite
:19:57. > :20:02.laughs on The One Show next week. Now, Harry, we have got some laughs
:20:03. > :20:05.for you right now. The question is what are these
:20:06. > :20:10.people laughing at that you are about to see. I see, it's a quiz.
:20:11. > :20:18.First, this presenter in Australia having an unprofessional moment.
:20:19. > :20:22.What are they laughing at? LAUGHTER
:20:23. > :20:27.We have options for you. OK. Is he laughing at his co-host falling
:20:28. > :20:31.over, Donald Trump or a grumpy cat? Cats are always funny. I am going to
:20:32. > :20:40.say grumpy cat. Let's have a look. It is a grumpy cat!
:20:41. > :20:44.Grumpy cat. Fred is laughing too. OK. On to the next one. Let's look
:20:45. > :20:52.at the next one. This little baby.
:20:53. > :20:56.Now, is this baby laughing at a snoring dog, a bowl of baked beans
:20:57. > :21:05.or a bald man with big collars on the telly? It can't be the last one.
:21:06. > :21:11.Baked beans. Let's find out. It's you! Lastly, this is from our
:21:12. > :21:17.show. Chatting to Dawn French in 2010. What was Dawn laughing at
:21:18. > :21:22.here? A dancing Daleka rude cake or Gyles Brandreth?
:21:23. > :21:29.It's got to be a rude cake. With Dawn. Let's find out.
:21:30. > :21:35.It is a rude cake! Very good. Two out of three ain't
:21:36. > :21:41.bad. Mike's here tonight. He wants to make it into the alien fun
:21:42. > :21:48.capsule, after all he and Harry had lots in common, not just the
:21:49. > :21:53.obvious. Harry loves all things weird. We could be brothers. You
:21:54. > :22:00.could. Mike has been on the track of a slithery cove cropping up in
:22:01. > :22:06.unexpected places. The tranquil waters of this lake are
:22:07. > :22:11.rich in aquatic life, from frogs and fish, to newts, the perfect prey for
:22:12. > :22:16.an animal you wouldn't normally associate with water, a long, smooth
:22:17. > :22:20.olive green predator, the grass snake. But there is a lot more to a
:22:21. > :22:25.grass snake than simply being, well, a snake in the grass.
:22:26. > :22:29.Personally I think the grass snake is one of the most poorly named
:22:30. > :22:34.animals in Britain. Most people would assume that only found on dry
:22:35. > :22:37.land, in amongst grass. But probably a much better name would be water
:22:38. > :22:42.snake. And I want to show you why.
:22:43. > :22:46.But the problem is finding one. The best chance of a sighting should
:22:47. > :22:53.be on a sunny morning, just like this.
:22:54. > :23:01.At the moment they'll have just come out and will be basking underneath
:23:02. > :23:05.that heat. They don't have ears but detect sound through vibrations in
:23:06. > :23:09.the ground, so my voice won't disturb them but I have to trod
:23:10. > :23:14.softly. For several hours, nothing. But just as we were about to give
:23:15. > :23:22.up, whilst the camera was pointing in another direction, it happened.
:23:23. > :23:27.This is a really exciting and frustrating in equal measure, our
:23:28. > :23:33.cameraman has just had a grass snake swim past his feet but it's
:23:34. > :23:38.disappeared. It seems to have gone under there. All we can do is sit
:23:39. > :23:48.and wait. Got it!
:23:49. > :23:52.It's a very, very long snake. That's got to be a metre 20. Making it a
:23:53. > :23:58.female, the females are generally longer. A lily pad is the perfect
:23:59. > :24:05.place for a rest. While tasting the air for the scent of prey. I have
:24:06. > :24:09.never seen one swimming as well as that, that's sensational.
:24:10. > :24:15.The best views I have ever had of grass snake, but I want to find out
:24:16. > :24:21.how it swims so well. It means getting a much closer look
:24:22. > :24:26.in more controlled surroundings. I am only handling this marvellous
:24:27. > :24:30.beast here with a special permission of the good folk here. It let's me
:24:31. > :24:36.show you why a grass snake is a grass snake. For me the key feature
:24:37. > :24:44.is that yellow collar behind its head. They get a really close-up
:24:45. > :24:49.view of its eye, the pupil is round, not like a vertical cat's eye pupil
:24:50. > :24:54.but I am not here to look into its eyes, I am here to look at its
:24:55. > :24:59.aquatic skills so we have set up a snake swimming pool. Under water and
:25:00. > :25:03.slow motion cameras will allow us to film it in action. Right, it's the
:25:04. > :25:05.moment of truth. Time to see how our swimmer gets on in the specially
:25:06. > :25:13.rigged tank. Here we go!
:25:14. > :25:19.Oh! Look at that! Powering away with the S-shaped
:25:20. > :25:23.curves. Slow motion reveals how the snake swims forward. With each turn
:25:24. > :25:29.its body acts like a paddle, pushing the water back to propell the snake
:25:30. > :25:35.forward. Its stream-lined body glides through
:25:36. > :25:42.the water. Strong muscles keep its head raised
:25:43. > :25:51.well above the surface. On the look out for predators and
:25:52. > :25:55.prey. Grass snakes really are perfectly
:25:56. > :26:01.adapted for an aquatic lifestyle. So next time you take a stroll along
:26:02. > :26:07.the water's edge, see if you can spot one of these skilful serpents
:26:08. > :26:11.swimming silently past. Isn't that a beautiful film? Thank
:26:12. > :26:17.you, Mike. Harry, it will come as no surprise to you that the grass snake
:26:18. > :26:20.is not a great name for that particular animal, because all
:26:21. > :26:27.afternoon you have been busy for us. Mike, pick it up from here. We gave
:26:28. > :26:32.you animal names that were slightly ridiculous and weird and asked you
:26:33. > :26:37.to draw what you thought they were. The first one was mountain chicken.
:26:38. > :26:43.I have drawn this, right. He is up a mountain. I like it. His beak is
:26:44. > :26:51.brightly coloured so that a plane won't hit him. Quite fat. He stays
:26:52. > :26:59.nice and warm up there. Accuracy, one. It's actually a frog. The
:27:00. > :27:05.largest frog in the Caribbean Islands. It lives up mountains and
:27:06. > :27:12.apparently tastes like chickens. It's disappearing fast. What is
:27:13. > :27:19.next? The next one is a... You tell us. You said it's a killdeer.
:27:20. > :27:24.Poisoned horns, it's got a helicopter landing pad. That's
:27:25. > :27:29.brilliant. That bit is remarkably accurate. Actually, it's not.
:27:30. > :27:46.Killdeer is not a killer deer and it's not a killer of deer. It's
:27:47. > :27:58.actually a north American mid-sized bird. One more. The Hickory Horned
:27:59. > :28:01.Devil. I am afraid it's a caterpillar from the north-east
:28:02. > :28:08.American forest. It's jumbo-sized, about the size of a hot-dog. It has
:28:09. > :28:14.amazing tips like a horned devil and it is utterly harmless. There you
:28:15. > :28:19.go. A huge round of applause for Harry. When Harry has more time this
:28:20. > :28:27.is what he can produce. Harry is hoping to get into the Royal Academy
:28:28. > :28:32.of Art, with this. His version of Monarch of the Glen. Stunning. We
:28:33. > :28:35.wish you all the best. Mike, thank you so much. Wonderful. That's your
:28:36. > :28:45.lot tonight. A big thank you to Harry Hill!
:28:46. > :28:50.Alien Fun Capsule continues on Thursday 8pm on ITV. Tomorrow we
:28:51. > :29:03.have a stellar line-up, we will be joined by the stars of a new film
:29:04. > :29:12.Life, Rebecca Ferguson and how old A lister Jake Gyllenhall. Sheena
:29:13. > :29:14.Easton will be making an entrance with 42 tap dancers. See you then.