:00:16. > :00:23.Hello and welcome to The One Show, all the way from Wild West London,
:00:24. > :00:28.with "Mad Dog" Alex Jones. And "Calamity" Chris Evans. All we're
:00:29. > :00:31.missing is a baddie, so who better than the man once named "sexiest
:00:32. > :00:34.villain" for his role as Al Swearengen in the western series
:00:35. > :00:50.Deadwood. Mosey down here pardner. It's Ian McShane!
:00:51. > :01:04.Hello! Hello, how are you? I'm all right. Ian, welcome. Great band, by
:01:05. > :01:15.right. Ian, welcome. Great band by the way! Hello, lemon suckers. It is
:01:16. > :01:22.a grubby old thing, fistfights, much dust... We haven't got a picture of
:01:23. > :01:29.you! If I had an accent like that, I'm not sure I would've gone it. Do
:01:30. > :01:38.you joy -- do you enjoy acting in that kind of thing? Have you watched
:01:39. > :01:45.it? I just love that type of thing. Following on from Sopranos, it had
:01:46. > :01:51.36 episodes. It is an extraordinary piece of work, the writing. It is
:01:52. > :01:56.the story of America, not just a western. Why does this man say, or
:01:57. > :02:05.claim, that he owes his career to you? There he is. This came up once
:02:06. > :02:12.before. Send a cheque, David! What is his story? There is an one. He
:02:13. > :02:16.mentioned it once on the show, I think it was Richard and Judy. They
:02:17. > :02:22.said they had a surprise for me. I sold him to send a cheque, but I
:02:23. > :02:27.still haven't got it. I think because he has a northern accent,
:02:28. > :02:33.and he looks a bit like me. It was a Lovejoy thing. I guess that was it,
:02:34. > :02:36.but Lovejoy had been over ten years then. You have such a big voice you
:02:37. > :02:41.then. You have such a big voice, you don't need a microphone! Ian is here
:02:42. > :02:48.all evening for a proper good old chat. We want you to dig out all
:02:49. > :02:51.those old pictures of you as a kid doing your best John Wayne
:02:52. > :02:58.impression, as Ian starred in Deadwood. The political cartoonist
:02:59. > :03:01.in this next film do not need a six shooter to take on the big guns. A
:03:02. > :03:06.shooter to take on the big guns A sharpened pencil and a fast wit
:03:07. > :03:09.other weapons of their choice. Last night, we sent Lucy "Blazin'
:03:10. > :03:18.Saddles" Siegle into a Soho bar to meet up with some of the best
:03:19. > :03:23.cartoonists in the boot -- in the business. This week, receiving a
:03:24. > :03:27.kick where it hurts, it has been the turn of Jeremy Hunt, Secretary of
:03:28. > :03:32.State for health. Tonight, cartoonists gathered to discuss the
:03:33. > :03:37.most hilarious and nefarious political moments of the last 12
:03:38. > :03:41.months. And we are in the perfect surroundings. This restaurant has
:03:42. > :03:48.been a favourite haunt for politicians planting clues and
:03:49. > :03:53.destroying careers for over 30 years. Ideal fodder for cartoonists.
:03:54. > :03:58.The thing about a cartoon is it does have certain privileges. It can say
:03:59. > :04:02.things that an article can't. You wouldn't get an article starting off
:04:03. > :04:07.by saying that the Prime Minister has a stupid, ugly mouth, which is
:04:08. > :04:12.what I do on a daily basis. Do you know when you have something really
:04:13. > :04:16.funny that crystallises that moment? When I am doing the rough draft I
:04:17. > :04:20.get a Eureka moment sometimes. Sometimes I think it is the funniest
:04:21. > :04:24.thing I have ever done in my life, and other times I just stare at it
:04:25. > :04:31.and have no idea what I am talking about. Who really goes for it here?
:04:32. > :04:35.Martin. There are whole swathes of people out there just waiting to be
:04:36. > :04:37.offended. I have received death threats from all sort of people by
:04:38. > :04:44.threats from all sort of people, by e-mail. People ask why am so
:04:45. > :04:48.cynical. I am not cynical. I am sceptical. Tony Blair was the most
:04:49. > :04:53.popular Prime Minister people had ever known in 97, but after he
:04:54. > :05:04.resigned, he couldn't even walk down the street. Nadine Doris became a
:05:05. > :05:11.target this year after her appearance on I'm A Celebrity Get Me
:05:12. > :05:19.Out Of Here. Why is somebody like her such a target? Because she is in
:05:20. > :05:22.the news. It is said that the one -- the one thing worse for a politician
:05:23. > :05:27.than being drawn in a political cartoon is not being drawn in one.
:05:28. > :05:34.Because people have to have heard of them. I would guess that any MP in
:05:35. > :05:37.the House of Commons would be flattered to be drawn by you. Also
:05:38. > :05:43.the point about cartoonists is it is mind over matter. They pretend they
:05:44. > :05:49.don't mind and we pretend they don't matter. I know where politicians
:05:50. > :05:53.hang it. They hang it in their toilets. You don't have to be Freud
:05:54. > :05:59.to work out what is happening there. They are diffusing the damage we are
:06:00. > :06:04.trying to do to them as the silent assassins. This year, satirists lost
:06:05. > :06:07.perhaps one of their greatest sources of parody, Margaret
:06:08. > :06:11.Thatcher. How does the current crop of political leaders measure up? You
:06:12. > :06:17.know you've got them when they just pour out of your hand, and you have
:06:18. > :06:23.recreated them. Nigel Farage, his face, and the beer and cigarettes. I
:06:24. > :06:27.have a funny story involving Ed Miliband, because I absolutely love
:06:28. > :06:32.drawing him. He is the full package in terms of what he looks like, the
:06:33. > :06:38.way he behaves, public perception of him. You have so much to go on. If
:06:39. > :06:43.you want to produce an icon, the man staring eye of Thatcher, for
:06:44. > :06:51.example. They need to have a mad, staring eye. Brilliant. We are
:06:52. > :06:53.joined by two of those top cartoonists, Ben "The Kid" Jennings
:06:54. > :06:59.and "Buffalo" Bob Moran. Good evening. What have you two been
:07:00. > :07:10.sketching since you arrived here today? We both had a little go at...
:07:11. > :07:19.Guess! I will take either of those. Yours looks a little bit like aeon
:07:20. > :07:26.Hyslop -- like Ian Hyslop. Is that supposed to be me? We have a live
:07:27. > :07:29.challenge for you. Ian has picked a story from today's newspapers. You
:07:30. > :07:33.have ten minutes to think about it and then five minutes to sketch a
:07:34. > :07:40.cartoon that we will look at before the end of the show. Ian, what is
:07:41. > :07:42.the story. It is the news that the NSA has been listening in on the
:07:43. > :07:47.phone calls of 35 world leaders. phone calls of 35 world leaders
:07:48. > :07:52.Including Angela Merkel. So you have ten minutes to draw her. You've got
:07:53. > :07:59.some ideas together already, haven't you? Yes. It is a bit of an ongoing
:08:00. > :08:06.topic as well. So you are in the groove already. I love drawing
:08:07. > :08:08.Angela Merkel. So ten minutes to think about it and five minutes to
:08:09. > :08:16.draw it. Off you go. Great. Ian, we draw it. Off you go. Great. Ian we
:08:17. > :08:21.were talking earlier, and we were saying, in 30 years we have never
:08:22. > :08:25.seen you interviewed hardly at all. So you must be really passionate
:08:26. > :08:31.about this project, that you have flown all the way over from LA to
:08:32. > :08:39.give it a good push. I just happened to be in town. The BBC didn't give
:08:40. > :08:44.me a ticket! It is a great show. When sky brought it the first time,
:08:45. > :08:49.they spent a lot of money on it. I came over and did a bit of PR for
:08:50. > :08:56.it, but they put it out on Monday night at 10pm. That is not a great
:08:57. > :09:02.night for TV. So the show never got the audience it deserved in this
:09:03. > :09:06.country. In America, it was a huge hit. It went on for three years but
:09:07. > :09:13.not here. So when they said they would bring it back again on the CBS
:09:14. > :09:17.Action channel, I said, absolutely. It is a really great show. Not just
:09:18. > :09:21.because it did wonders for me and the rest of the people in it and it
:09:22. > :09:30.was a big success, but because the guy who created it also created NYPD
:09:31. > :09:34.Blue, and he is a really phenomenal writer. It was like doing a
:09:35. > :09:42.workshop. It wasn't like doing a normal TV show. There was never a
:09:43. > :09:48.script for the show. There was just the idea and scenes. We filmed it
:09:49. > :09:54.all on a ranch. It was about 25 miles north of LA, and everybody was
:09:55. > :10:01.there. The writers, the producers, the sets, everything. We were all
:10:02. > :10:07.there, so we could do whatever he wanted, so it was kind of like
:10:08. > :10:13.improvising every day. He once asked how you make the show, and he said,
:10:14. > :10:19.we all get there at 6:30am, we hold our private parts, and we jump! I
:10:20. > :10:23.was very good there. You've got to be careful before the watershed!
:10:24. > :10:23.was very good there. You've got to be careful before the watershed My
:10:24. > :10:35.be careful before the watershed! My grandchildren are here as well. Give
:10:36. > :10:45.us a wave! A very wild West wave! Wild Bill Hickok was a real
:10:46. > :10:51.character. They were all characters. The sheriff, there he is, upon the
:10:52. > :10:57.screen, he is a real character. The town is famous because it is where
:10:58. > :11:08.Wild Bill came from and was shot in the back. He was holding the famous
:11:09. > :11:13.poker hand, aces and eight. He was shot in the back. It still happens
:11:14. > :11:18.all the time, because it is a huge tourist attraction. Yes. They had a
:11:19. > :11:22.big do there about a year after the show. There is huge interest in this
:11:23. > :11:26.town because of the success of the TV show. A few of the lads went who
:11:27. > :11:32.was in the show -- who were in the show. People were dressed up. It was
:11:33. > :11:41.like going to a circus, with people getting dressed up as characters and
:11:42. > :11:50.yelling on the streets. Wide easing it was such a hit? -- wide EU
:11:51. > :11:56.think? It was huge. A Western TV show in the modern day. I think
:11:57. > :12:05.because it was HBO, it could do it well. If it had been on CBS or BBC,
:12:06. > :12:10.you are constricted from doing the nitty-gritty. He created his own
:12:11. > :12:19.world and his own vision. I think because it wasn't just a Western
:12:20. > :12:25.every week. It was about the town, the people. What about Lovejoy fame
:12:26. > :12:31.compared to Deadwood fame? American fame is different. I did have a
:12:32. > :12:40.meeting once about doing Lovejoy in America. They wanted to do it. We
:12:41. > :12:48.only did a year in 1986, and then we took it off the air for three years.
:12:49. > :12:52.Jonathan Powell came back as controller, and asked us to do it
:12:53. > :12:58.again the same way, and it was hugely successful. NBC heard about
:12:59. > :13:04.it and had an idea, and I said, why don't you do an American show? That
:13:05. > :13:13.it never went anywhere. But you did OK elsewhere. But Edward, I think it
:13:14. > :13:17.is all about timing. -- Deadwood. The timing was right. It was after
:13:18. > :13:25.the Sopranos. It was the show's time. As much good as it did me and
:13:26. > :13:30.Tim and everyone else, the show is a phenomenal show. Every character in
:13:31. > :13:34.it gets fair weight. Even the actors who you think our tiny parts are
:13:35. > :13:38.suddenly thrust to the front. That is why he is a great writer. He
:13:39. > :13:44.never loses sight of what he is doing. If you have satellite or
:13:45. > :13:50.cable, Deadwood is showing on the CBS Action channel in its entirety
:13:51. > :13:56.from the 6th of December, and is out on DVD. Of course, there are more
:13:57. > :14:03.than a few cliches in Westerns. A stranger walks into a saloon. There
:14:04. > :14:11.is a game of poker in the corner. There is a nervous Barman cleaning
:14:12. > :14:16.glasses with a tea towel. There is another cliche that cannot happen in
:14:17. > :14:22.the real world, and we can prove it. Black and white movies are full
:14:23. > :14:27.of quicksand. Our cowboy hero is chased by the baddie. He gets to the
:14:28. > :14:32.quicksand, and he sinks, inch by inch, until all that remains to see
:14:33. > :14:36.where he was is his hat. Movies like this one has got it all wrong. You
:14:37. > :14:46.cannot act chilly sink down this far. So what exactly is quicksand?
:14:47. > :14:50.Morecambe, part of the north-west coastline of England, is around 120
:14:51. > :14:58.square miles of complex geography, fine sand, deep limestone and tricky
:14:59. > :15:02.tides. It is one of the top places in the world to have quicksand. In
:15:03. > :15:07.the 1500s, a royal guide was appointed to help anyone who wanted
:15:08. > :15:12.to cross the bay. Cedric Robinson has just celebrated 50 years in this
:15:13. > :15:21.role, still using a traditional method of mapping out a safe passage
:15:22. > :15:25.away from danger. You put the stick in here and test the depths. A big
:15:26. > :15:31.rock. If you went in there, you would be there for a while. You
:15:32. > :15:35.would need be rescued. Quicksand is made by Dykes, gullies, which drain
:15:36. > :15:41.off from higher ground into another area of water. I was told by my
:15:42. > :15:47.father to never cross with a horse and cart in those areas. When people
:15:48. > :15:52.do not listen, they get stuck. I am just looking at my feet. Am I just
:15:53. > :16:00.moving around and sinking in? You are not. It is because I stood
:16:01. > :16:04.still. That water coming out, that will set just like cement. For a
:16:05. > :16:10.beach to have quicksand, it needs to elements. Sound of just the right
:16:11. > :16:14.grain size, and underground, flowing water that is forced to the surface.
:16:15. > :16:22.Researchers at the University of Leeds are trying to work out exactly
:16:23. > :16:26.why, how and when quicksand appears. This professor is leading the
:16:27. > :16:30.research. We have sediment layers in here. At the moment it is solid. We
:16:31. > :16:33.here. At the moment it is solid We are going to inject water
:16:34. > :16:38.underneath. It is beginning to support more and more of the weight
:16:39. > :16:43.of the grains, so we are getting closer to that transition from solid
:16:44. > :16:48.to liquid. There he goes! It has just become quicksand, and you can
:16:49. > :16:54.see that our volunteer is slipping in. Why exactly does he think? With
:16:55. > :17:00.quicksand, the grains are just on top of each other, supporting each
:17:01. > :17:04.other's weight. When you step on the quicksand, that structure collapses,
:17:05. > :17:09.and it squeezes the water out, and then it begins to turn back into a
:17:10. > :17:19.solid, and forms a tight, dense network around you, and that is what
:17:20. > :17:24.keeps you fast in the sediment. If someone does get stuck, the Coast
:17:25. > :17:28.Guard are on hand to help. He won Morecambe, they regularly have
:17:29. > :17:32.training exercises, and today they are going to rescue me. The reason
:17:33. > :17:37.films have got it wrong is because we are less dense than quicksand. A
:17:38. > :17:43.person cannot sink below the waist. Within minutes, I am up to the waist
:17:44. > :17:51.and stuck. It is pressing on your legs like crazy. Below the surface,
:17:52. > :17:55.the water has been squeezed out and the sand has become solid around me.
:17:56. > :18:01.Now it is down to the coastguard to set me free. How we get you out, we
:18:02. > :18:06.inject water into the mud. It thins it out and we dig you out.
:18:07. > :18:12.The water is pumped in, under the surface, to reliquefy the sand
:18:13. > :18:17.trapping me in. After a short time I can feel that transition point of
:18:18. > :18:23.when the sand goes from a solid into a liquid and becomes lose around my
:18:24. > :18:28.legs. You know what is really scary about
:18:29. > :18:33.that is just how quickly you sink in. I was only in up to here - my
:18:34. > :18:38.knees. Imagine what it would be like if you went up to here!
:18:39. > :18:44.See, all those years of worry and youed would never sin -- and you
:18:45. > :18:50.would never sink below your waist. You would get sun burnt. You would
:18:51. > :18:54.be bright red. Antonia Quirke is here now, to
:18:55. > :18:59.celebrate some classic western themes. Quicksand aside, what three
:19:00. > :19:06.top ingredients do you need in every top western? A great actor - John
:19:07. > :19:14.Wayne. You need gun-slingings, tricks and a brilliant brilliant
:19:15. > :19:16.sound track. Let's see him in one of his first films then - this is an
:19:17. > :19:39.innocent man. Don't look back! How did it all come about? Westerns
:19:40. > :19:41.started in the 1920s and 1930s, outside Hollywood n the desert. They
:19:42. > :19:45.started in the 1920s and 1930s, made hundreds of them. 18 million
:19:46. > :19:50.Americans queued up every week to see them. John Wayne was a props
:19:51. > :19:54.boy. He was carrying an armchair over his head one day and some
:19:55. > :20:00.director thought he looked good and put him on camera. The early films
:20:01. > :20:06.are lost. That is a rare footage, 1933.
:20:07. > :20:20.Let's see him as we know him now in The Searchers. All about the war.
:20:21. > :20:28.That is a famous shot. It is. It is one of the greatest
:20:29. > :20:33.shots in cinema. This actor came to represent America itself. To do him
:20:34. > :20:41.walking away like that is terrific. How did he develop that walk? He was
:20:42. > :20:48.copying a Native American tribal walk.
:20:49. > :20:53.I think he dropped his baguette! They used smaller and smaller horses
:20:54. > :21:01.as he got older so he would manage to look as big. Who knows what the
:21:02. > :21:06.truth of this is! We have done John Wayne. Now gun-slinging. Some of our
:21:07. > :21:14.greatest actors have spent months of their lives trying to perfect tricks
:21:15. > :21:25.with guns. Steve McQueen trying to learn to reload without looking
:21:26. > :21:29.down. This is Shane.
:21:30. > :21:45.Shane, get out! He didn't enjoying any of that. A
:21:46. > :21:50.scene later on... He was... I am a huge fan of movies. It is a classic
:21:51. > :21:59.movie. That is really, if you know that, that is like Drive is the
:22:00. > :22:08.modern Shane as a film noir. It is a fabl.
:22:09. > :22:14.A great movie. We are not doing sound tracks. No! Glad you got that
:22:15. > :22:19.note! Ten minutes have past since we set Bob Moran and Ben Jennings the
:22:20. > :22:25.challenge to think up a topical cartoon live on the show. Now, they
:22:26. > :22:30.have just five minutes to scech that -- sketch that cartoon. Boys, go!
:22:31. > :22:36.They are off! In the mean time, we'll go for a relaxing stroll
:22:37. > :22:41.around the town of Pentwynmaur, with one of Britain's most successful
:22:42. > :22:44.boxers. I think you can give that a bit more, to be honest! Have another
:22:45. > :22:53.go with this! Great! Let's go! It is the
:22:54. > :23:00.undefeated supermiddleweight of the world Joe Calzaghe.
:23:01. > :23:05.I'm Joe Calzaghe. I am going back to the house in Pentwynmaur, South
:23:06. > :23:08.Wales, where I grew up. I lived here from the age of three. My mum and
:23:09. > :23:24.dad still live here today. My mother is a local girl. My father
:23:25. > :23:30.decided to go to Wales, went into a Wimpy, six days later, they met and
:23:31. > :23:36.got married. My father is a musician, so he would be away a lot
:23:37. > :23:38.when I was young. Most brothers and sisters fight a lot of the time. We
:23:39. > :23:43.sisters fight a lot of the time We love each other to bits, but we
:23:44. > :23:48.would fight and misbehave and whatever. My day was like play
:23:49. > :23:55.football, go hunting, go into the woods. I was always outdoors. I
:23:56. > :24:00.would come in when the light lights came on. I try and do that with my
:24:01. > :24:05.children now. Now we have computers and phones. There was nothing like
:24:06. > :24:12.that. It was great back in them days. It was all about the outdoors.
:24:13. > :24:18.The kitchen is my favourite place, to be honest. My mother used to make
:24:19. > :24:24.a great dinner and steak and kidney pie. My grandfather is a chef. My
:24:25. > :24:31.two uncles are chefs. I cannot really cook very well. I just do the
:24:32. > :24:36.tasting. I have got myself -- I got myself a ferret. I used to like
:24:37. > :24:42.rabbiting. My mum was very upset about that. So, I had to sneak them
:24:43. > :24:44.in the first time. She was like, "don't bring them in this house."
:24:45. > :24:45.in the first time. She was like, "don't bring them in this house " I
:24:46. > :24:49."don't bring them in this house." I was OK. I would leave it outside and
:24:50. > :24:55.sneak it in the fridge when she was not looking. From nine, my dad
:24:56. > :25:01.brought me a punch ball. I stood and whacked it. Knocked the top off it.
:25:02. > :25:06.He was like, oh, OK! Do that again! He saw a talent and took me to the
:25:07. > :25:12.boxing gym. I remember to this day the smell of the gym. I remember how
:25:13. > :25:18.scary it looked. A nine-year-old kid walking in and seeing these guys
:25:19. > :25:24.punching bags. I lost my first ever fight, actually. I cried like a baby
:25:25. > :25:29.in the ring, with my head against the post. A champion at 13 - that
:25:30. > :25:34.was it for me. Everything else, that feeling. I wanted to become a world
:25:35. > :25:40.champion. My mum never wanted many me to box. She was also supportive,
:25:41. > :25:43.because she knew how much I wanted to win, how much I wanted to become
:25:44. > :25:48.a champion. This is where I would make a den
:25:49. > :25:54.when I was about six or seven. I used to make a den here with my
:25:55. > :26:00.mates. Good thanks. You all right! Mr
:26:01. > :26:05.Stephens, you all right? I like to stay at home, be around my family.
:26:06. > :26:11.The great thing is you are left alone, brought up in this place I
:26:12. > :26:17.can walk down the street and you are just Joe.
:26:18. > :26:22.In the early days, I had to be in my front day playing football or be
:26:23. > :26:27.with my mates. We would go to the football field and spend all day
:26:28. > :26:36.playing. My kids are quite grown up now. You think how quick time goes.
:26:37. > :26:40.All my mates went to Newbridge school. I went to a comprehensive
:26:41. > :26:49.school. I didn't get on there from age 14. Trouble and stuff. It was
:26:50. > :26:53.not physical. Talking and mental and name-calling. You can become
:26:54. > :26:55.sensitive. You get ganged up on. name-calling. You can become
:26:56. > :26:58.sensitive. You get ganged up on I sensitive. You get ganged up on. I
:26:59. > :27:06.was sensitive. I was quite shy growing up. It was one of those
:27:07. > :27:07.things. I'll always have fond memories of this place. It will
:27:08. > :27:27.always be home for me. Lovely film. Joe Calzaghe! A great
:27:28. > :27:32.boxer. Terrible cook, according to Ian, who saw him on MasterChef.
:27:33. > :27:38.Boys, you have 30 seconds to finish your cartoons before we want to see
:27:39. > :27:46.the drawings. This is exciting! Once again - the topic is wild leaders
:27:47. > :27:52.being bugged by the US. Is that correct? That is correct. They have
:27:53. > :27:56.a fondness for cartooning Angela Merkel for some bizarre reason. I
:27:57. > :28:03.don't know why! Five seconds left!
:28:04. > :28:09.OK, here we go. Put your pens down. OK, come over here boys. As quick as
:28:10. > :28:15.you can! Run, run, run, run, otherwise we'll be walking into the
:28:16. > :28:21.Queen Vic! Ian Smith - when he was three.
:28:22. > :28:32.Forgive the dodgy haircut. He blames his mum. This is Raymond, he is now
:28:33. > :28:44.30. This is Chris, in times gone by. All right p, boying. -- all right
:28:45. > :28:54.boys. An ear wig going through the ear ears. I have gone for Angela
:28:55. > :29:01.Merkel in the bath. I love that! Ian, thanks for being on the
:29:02. > :29:06.programme. Thanks to all our guests. The musicians, who were brilliant.
:29:07. > :29:11.CBS Action, every day from the 6th CBS Action, every day from the th
:29:12. > :29:17.September, you can see Ian. See you on Monday. Goodbye!
:29:18. > :29:21.-- 6th December. You can see Ian then.
:29:22. > :29:26.See you on Monday.