Party

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0:00:06 > 0:00:09# Where do you go when you know nobody can understand you?

0:00:09 > 0:00:12# When it's just too much to handle

0:00:12 > 0:00:15# What you do when you end up somewhere you never been to?

0:00:15 > 0:00:18# Wash that stress out like it was shampoo

0:00:18 > 0:00:19# You should stay

0:00:19 > 0:00:20# It can change

0:00:20 > 0:00:23# There's good days and bad days

0:00:23 > 0:00:26# But one day down the line this time is sure to stop

0:00:26 > 0:00:28# So the only time is now 4 o'clock. #

0:00:31 > 0:00:32Listen up.

0:00:32 > 0:00:35Switch off.

0:00:35 > 0:00:39Keep closed.

0:00:39 > 0:00:40Feed me.

0:00:41 > 0:00:44- Make sure you double lock at night. - Yeah.

0:00:44 > 0:00:46- Keep the windows...- Mum, it's fine.

0:00:46 > 0:00:49We'll be sweet as. Oh, and, uh...

0:00:49 > 0:00:53- What time are you flying out tonight?- Why?

0:00:53 > 0:00:55I was just... I was just wondering.

0:00:55 > 0:01:01Read my lips. Two friends, Ash and Ryan, no more.

0:01:03 > 0:01:06- And you'll be here to keep an eye on him, yeah?- Mm...

0:01:06 > 0:01:08Well, I thought maybe I'd go check out a gig in...

0:01:08 > 0:01:11No way. You're not leaving Josh to throw some kind of wild party.

0:01:11 > 0:01:15- They're only two friends, Mum. - That's what your brother said

0:01:15 > 0:01:18when he was your age. "Just two friends, Mum."

0:01:18 > 0:01:23What sort of friends feed crisps to a goldfish?

0:01:23 > 0:01:29What sort of friends leave dirty footprints over my bedroom floor?

0:01:30 > 0:01:35- And what kind of friends are sick in a jug?- Ow!

0:01:35 > 0:01:37Mum, how many times can I say I'm sorry, you know?

0:01:37 > 0:01:41- I learned my lesson.- Yeah, yeah. I've learnt my lesson too.

0:01:41 > 0:01:44- You are staying in with him.- OW!

0:01:44 > 0:01:45Ooh!

0:01:45 > 0:01:46THEY LAUGH

0:01:49 > 0:01:53- What time you going to this gig? - You are joking.- She'll never know.

0:01:53 > 0:01:58She'll know. She'll phone me up, she'll want to speak to me.

0:01:58 > 0:02:03- Well, I won't answer. - She'll find out.

0:02:03 > 0:02:06She's like a black Miss Marple with attitude.

0:02:06 > 0:02:09- You saw here with that spoon. - You scared?

0:02:09 > 0:02:11Of course I'm scared, you muppet!

0:02:11 > 0:02:15So, you're just going to hang around all night like one of those

0:02:15 > 0:02:17fun-sucking bin bags from Harry Potter?

0:02:17 > 0:02:23Come on, bruv. It could be just me, you, Ash, Ryan.

0:02:23 > 0:02:29- Could get a pizza, rent a DVD. - Yeah. Watch Chicken Run.

0:02:31 > 0:02:36- I just don't get it. Why does no-one trust me?- I trust you.

0:02:36 > 0:02:39- Ash, you'd trust a pig if it told you it could fly.- Sure.

0:02:39 > 0:02:44I mean, if it's learned how to talk, that must be a pretty clever pig.

0:02:44 > 0:02:46Look. All I'm trying to say is,

0:02:46 > 0:02:49just because my brother had a party once doesn't mean I will too.

0:02:49 > 0:02:51Yo, Josh. Done the invites to your party.

0:02:51 > 0:02:55- Great. Don't hand them out yet though.- All right.

0:02:55 > 0:02:57I'll just go back in time and not hand them out, shall I?

0:02:57 > 0:03:00What did you do that for, you spanner?

0:03:00 > 0:03:03Because you told me to, you plank.

0:03:03 > 0:03:05Now I'm telling you to get them all back.

0:03:08 > 0:03:12All right. Fine. I will. You monkey wrench.

0:03:14 > 0:03:15So are you having a party or what?

0:03:15 > 0:03:19Yeah, once I figure out how to dump the babysitter.

0:03:20 > 0:03:21DRUMMING

0:03:28 > 0:03:31Josh! Josh!

0:03:31 > 0:03:33What did the drum kit ever do to you?

0:03:33 > 0:03:37Ruin my social life. I'm pretending it's my brother.

0:03:37 > 0:03:42- So I'm guessing Nathan's not on your list then?- What list?

0:03:42 > 0:03:45The guest list for your party. Found this on the floor.

0:03:45 > 0:03:47Oh, that's not really a party.

0:03:47 > 0:03:51It's just a small social gathering with a couple of personal friends.

0:03:51 > 0:03:54- Sounds great. I'll try and pop along.- Oh, no, no...- I'm joking.

0:03:54 > 0:03:58Thanks for the invite but I'm going to see L'Amour et La Femme.

0:03:58 > 0:04:00Who the what now?

0:04:00 > 0:04:01SHE LAUGHS

0:04:01 > 0:04:03It's a film. A classic.

0:04:03 > 0:04:05It's old, French, black and white, about four hours long.

0:04:05 > 0:04:09- You'd love it(!)- Wow, miss. Why don't you do more fun things?

0:04:09 > 0:04:11Like sticking forks in your head.

0:04:11 > 0:04:15Yes, I am aware the I will probably be the only person in the cinema.

0:04:17 > 0:04:20- You're starting to sound like my brother now.- Do I?

0:04:20 > 0:04:24Yeah, he loves all those old, boring black and white films.

0:04:24 > 0:04:25Really?

0:04:25 > 0:04:28Yeah. He's seen every one. He's practically French now.

0:04:28 > 0:04:33- Nathan can speak French. - Yeah, sure...

0:04:33 > 0:04:37But the problems is, his mates always want him to see proper films.

0:04:37 > 0:04:38You know, with colour.

0:04:38 > 0:04:42He's welcome to come along with me if he likes.

0:04:42 > 0:04:45Yeah, you should totally ask him.

0:04:45 > 0:04:48Yeah. I'll do that.

0:04:53 > 0:04:54Wait. He said what?

0:04:54 > 0:04:57Classic French cinema. Said you're a fan.

0:04:57 > 0:05:00- Yeah, that.- Like I'd... They're showing L'Amour et La Femme

0:05:00 > 0:05:02and I wondered if you want to come along.

0:05:02 > 0:05:07Yeah, course. Unless you wanted to watch something else.

0:05:07 > 0:05:11I heard Shark Attackers was supposed to be great, but...

0:05:11 > 0:05:16I'm sure L'amour and the thing... That sounds good too.

0:05:16 > 0:05:23- Josh said you're practically fluent. - Me? Yeah. 'Leetle beet'.

0:05:23 > 0:05:27- You'll have to give me French lessons.- Ah, oui oui!- Mr Carter.

0:05:27 > 0:05:33Or should I say Monsieur Carter? Vous parlez francais alors.

0:05:33 > 0:05:35- You what?- You speak French.

0:05:37 > 0:05:41- Yes. Yes I do.- Formidable.

0:05:41 > 0:05:43Our French assistante is down with the flu.

0:05:43 > 0:05:45You wouldn't mind filling in, would you?

0:05:50 > 0:05:53Seven, eight. They probably...

0:05:53 > 0:05:56- All right. Come on.- Oi. Fish food.

0:05:56 > 0:05:59- What's up?- What's up? I'll tell you what's up.

0:05:59 > 0:06:00What's up is I'm now on my way

0:06:00 > 0:06:02to teach a Year 8 French conversation class.

0:06:02 > 0:06:06- No way! Since when did you start speaking French?- I don't.

0:06:06 > 0:06:09- But thanks to you, Bogof thinks I do.- How come? Oh, let me guess.

0:06:09 > 0:06:12You were trying to get a date with Miss Poppy.

0:06:12 > 0:06:15- You're in it deep now, mate. - No, you're in it deep. With me.

0:06:15 > 0:06:20- Who me? You're supposed to be thanking me.- What for?

0:06:20 > 0:06:25- Did you get a date nor not?- Well, yeah, but...- Well, there you go.

0:06:25 > 0:06:29- I know what you're up to, so I am going to go out tonight.- Sweet as.

0:06:29 > 0:06:32But I'm trusting you, all right?

0:06:32 > 0:06:36You can have two friends around, Ash, Ryan. No more. Promise me.

0:06:36 > 0:06:37Would I lie to you?

0:06:43 > 0:06:46Yo. Party round at mine tonight.

0:06:46 > 0:06:47THEY CHEER

0:06:50 > 0:06:54- Got them.- Great. You can hand them out now.

0:06:58 > 0:07:00Je m'appelle Katie.

0:07:00 > 0:07:03J'ai quatorze ans. J'adore les animaux.

0:07:03 > 0:07:05J'ai un chien, deux chats,

0:07:05 > 0:07:12un petit lapin et un poisson rouge qui sait nager a l'envers!

0:07:12 > 0:07:14STUDENTS LAUGH

0:07:15 > 0:07:16Heh.

0:07:19 > 0:07:21Here you go. See you later, mate.

0:07:21 > 0:07:25- Right. That's all of them. - See you tonight, losers.

0:07:27 > 0:07:29That's what we've got to look out for.

0:07:29 > 0:07:32Troublesome gatecrashers like Molly.

0:07:32 > 0:07:35Chill out, Fiona. She's not going to gatecrash.

0:07:35 > 0:07:37I invited her.

0:07:37 > 0:07:41You what? You can't have. I do all the invites.

0:07:41 > 0:07:42Nah. I didn't bother with them.

0:07:42 > 0:07:45You do not want to get bogged down in paperwork.

0:07:45 > 0:07:48But... Who else have you asked?

0:07:48 > 0:07:51Ash, we're going to have a problem with numbers.

0:07:51 > 0:07:53Don't worry about that. I asked loads of people.

0:07:53 > 0:07:55That's what I mean, you melon.

0:07:55 > 0:07:58Guys, I heard Josh's party was getting out of control,

0:07:58 > 0:08:01but it's fine because I've invited some really hard Year 11s

0:08:01 > 0:08:04- so there'll be no trouble. - What? They can't come.

0:08:04 > 0:08:06Tell them. Tell them they can't come.

0:08:06 > 0:08:10I would, but they'll probably beat you up.

0:08:10 > 0:08:14It's fine! It's all under control.

0:08:14 > 0:08:16Don't invite anyone else.

0:08:16 > 0:08:18What time's the party tonight?

0:08:18 > 0:08:21You're definitely not coming. No way. There's no room.

0:08:21 > 0:08:23You saying I'm too fat to fit in a house?

0:08:23 > 0:08:24SIGHS

0:08:24 > 0:08:26Fine, you can come.

0:08:26 > 0:08:29I know. And I'll bring my friends Britney, Lynne and Adele,

0:08:29 > 0:08:32and they'll bring their cousins, boyfriends and their mates.

0:08:32 > 0:08:34But not Shanice. She's a nightmare.

0:08:34 > 0:08:37- Coming to the party? Everybody is. - THEY CHATTER

0:08:37 > 0:08:40Mate. You have well messed this up.

0:08:40 > 0:08:42You did what?!

0:08:44 > 0:08:46HE RAPS: I thought I had this under control

0:08:46 > 0:08:50Now it feels like I dug up a hole and I'm falling

0:08:49 > 0:08:50Whoa!

0:08:50 > 0:08:53Man, I'm falling

0:08:51 > 0:08:53Whoa!

0:08:53 > 0:08:55This party's already a disaster

0:08:55 > 0:08:57Like Nathan's was in the past

0:08:57 > 0:08:59I know for a fact he ruined his own bash

0:08:59 > 0:09:01And that was without any Ryan and no Ash

0:09:01 > 0:09:04I'll be grounded so long I won't see the summer

0:09:04 > 0:09:06Thanks to Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dumber

0:09:06 > 0:09:09I want to call the whole thing off right now

0:09:09 > 0:09:11But there's other problems like how?

0:09:11 > 0:09:15I don't know if I can pull out Only a loser would cancel now

0:09:15 > 0:09:19I guarantee nobody tells me I'm any less than the next king of Elmsbury

0:09:19 > 0:09:21J Carter, work hard, play harder

0:09:21 > 0:09:24Now it's time to finish what they started

0:09:24 > 0:09:26You seen the boy now see the man

0:09:26 > 0:09:28Oh, yeah, I forgot. I need a plan

0:09:28 > 0:09:30- HE RAPS:- I thought I had this under control

0:09:30 > 0:09:35Now I feel like I dug up a hole and I'm falling

0:09:33 > 0:09:35Whoa!

0:09:35 > 0:09:37Man, I'm falling

0:09:36 > 0:09:37Whoa!

0:09:37 > 0:09:39I thought I had this under control

0:09:39 > 0:09:43Now I feel like I dug up a hole and I'm falling

0:09:42 > 0:09:43Whoa!

0:09:43 > 0:09:46Man, I'm falling

0:09:44 > 0:09:46Whoa!

0:09:46 > 0:09:48Man, come on, Nathan, not again

0:09:48 > 0:09:50Je suis le grande croissant brain

0:09:50 > 0:09:52I speak French like fish climb trees

0:09:52 > 0:09:55Catching my breath's where you'll find me

0:09:55 > 0:09:56What do I know about French cinema?

0:09:56 > 0:10:00Hope they only used words like petit pois

0:10:00 > 0:10:02Bon bons, merci and brie

0:10:02 > 0:10:04And, uh...oui

0:10:04 > 0:10:05And me, I need another option

0:10:05 > 0:10:08Everybody's coming to my house How to stop them?

0:10:08 > 0:10:10Without looking like a killjoy

0:10:10 > 0:10:13For real, oi, this one is going to take skills, boy

0:10:13 > 0:10:15But I'm the man for the job

0:10:15 > 0:10:17Brains in my head and a tongue in my gob

0:10:17 > 0:10:19Yeah, there may be an element of doubt and risk

0:10:19 > 0:10:22But I think I might have a way out of this.

0:10:40 > 0:10:41KNOCK ON DOOR

0:10:48 > 0:10:50KETTLE WHISTLES

0:10:52 > 0:10:57So. Who's going to Josh Carter's party, hmm? Hands up.

0:10:57 > 0:10:59- MAKES A BUZZER SOUND - Try again.

0:11:00 > 0:11:05Ah, correct answer. Cos it ain't happening. Yeah?

0:11:05 > 0:11:09Mr Carter has officially pooped this party.

0:11:09 > 0:11:10Right?

0:11:17 > 0:11:18Sorry about that, Mr Jenkins.

0:11:24 > 0:11:27- So it's definitely off then? - Yeah, gutted.

0:11:27 > 0:11:30Killjoy of a brother found out. Must've looked in every class.

0:11:30 > 0:11:31Tell you what.

0:11:31 > 0:11:36When I get older, whoever grassed you up, I'm going to... Urgh...

0:11:36 > 0:11:41- I'll... Well, it's bad. I'm so angry.- Yeah, right.

0:11:41 > 0:11:43Cos I tell you, I am fuming.

0:11:43 > 0:11:45What are you looking at me for? It weren't me.

0:11:45 > 0:11:49Wasn't it, Ryan? Ryan, wasn't it?

0:11:49 > 0:11:52- What are you saying?- You're the one who had the invitations.

0:11:52 > 0:11:55Maybe you accidentally on purpose dropped one

0:11:55 > 0:11:56underneath his brother's door.

0:11:56 > 0:11:59And maybe your mum accidentally on purpose

0:11:59 > 0:12:02dropped you on your stupid head.

0:12:02 > 0:12:05- Maybe she did, Ryan. Maybe she did.- Guys, calm down.

0:12:05 > 0:12:09Break it up, break it up. It wasn't Ryan who grassed up, it was me.

0:12:09 > 0:12:13- What? Why?- Think about it.

0:12:13 > 0:12:16You guys totally messed it up by telling everyone to come.

0:12:16 > 0:12:20This way the house doesn't get trashed and I stay cool.

0:12:20 > 0:12:23- Apart from with your brother. - Oh, Nathan?

0:12:23 > 0:12:24I can handle him.

0:12:24 > 0:12:27That's...brilliant.

0:12:28 > 0:12:30I'm still watching you.

0:12:34 > 0:12:36Oh, bonjour.

0:12:36 > 0:12:38- Oh... - HE MUMBLES

0:12:38 > 0:12:40Mel. See, tonight...

0:12:40 > 0:12:43No, I still don't want to see Shark Attackers.

0:12:43 > 0:12:46No, no. Nor do I. No.

0:12:46 > 0:12:49But I think I'm going to have to look after Josh

0:12:49 > 0:12:51cos our mum's away and he was...

0:12:51 > 0:12:54- Planning a party?- Right.

0:12:54 > 0:12:57I think I'll have to stay in and make sure nothing happens.

0:12:57 > 0:13:00- Sorry.- That's fine. So are you staying at his?- At his?

0:13:00 > 0:13:05- Or is he staying at yours?- Yeah. My place, yeah.

0:13:05 > 0:13:07Where I live on my own. Of course. My place.

0:13:07 > 0:13:12Um, well, if you really can't get out then I could come over to yours.

0:13:12 > 0:13:15- I've got it on DVD. We could still watch it together.- Yeah?

0:13:16 > 0:13:19That'd be great. That's great.

0:13:19 > 0:13:20C'est genial.

0:13:32 > 0:13:35- Look, Josh, about tonight. - Yeah, bruv.

0:13:35 > 0:13:39Before we go in there's something I wanted to say.

0:13:39 > 0:13:40I lied to you and I'm not proud of that.

0:13:40 > 0:13:44- Uh... Good.- You know, you trusted me

0:13:44 > 0:13:48and I said I wasn't going to have a party when I was.

0:13:48 > 0:13:52- You stepped in and saved me from myself.- Right.

0:13:52 > 0:13:55So tonight it's just me, Ash and Ryan and some pizzas,

0:13:55 > 0:13:57if you're going to get them for us.

0:13:57 > 0:14:00No. No way. There's been a change of plan.

0:14:00 > 0:14:03I'm staying in now and Ash and Ryan are not coming over.

0:14:03 > 0:14:08- In fact, you're staying in your room all night.- You what?

0:14:11 > 0:14:12That well ain't fair!

0:14:12 > 0:14:16You better let me bring my friends over or I'll phone Childline.

0:14:16 > 0:14:19Just count yourself lucky I haven't told Mum.

0:14:22 > 0:14:25- Mum, look at this. - This is why I hate weddings.

0:14:25 > 0:14:27CAR HORN BEEPS

0:14:27 > 0:14:30Oh, no! That's my taxi. Please!

0:14:32 > 0:14:38Right. Tickets, passport, money, phone.

0:14:38 > 0:14:40Phone, phone. Josh, help me find my phone.

0:14:44 > 0:14:48MOBILE PHONE RINGS It's ringing.

0:14:48 > 0:14:50PHONE RINGS

0:14:50 > 0:14:51Oh!

0:14:51 > 0:14:55Oh, thank you, Josh. What would I do without you? Right.

0:14:55 > 0:14:58There is lasagne in the oven

0:14:58 > 0:15:02and I want to find this place exactly as I left it, yeah?

0:15:02 > 0:15:04CD STACK CLATTERS

0:15:05 > 0:15:08- Love you.- Bye, Mum.

0:15:08 > 0:15:09Bye.

0:15:16 > 0:15:19Whoa, whoa. What's the hurry? She's not back till Sunday.

0:15:19 > 0:15:21No point cleaning till then.

0:15:21 > 0:15:24Yeah? Well, actually,

0:15:24 > 0:15:27- Miss Poppy's going to come round tonight.- What?!- Yeah.

0:15:27 > 0:15:30So you're going to have to help me clean up, and then...

0:15:30 > 0:15:33- you've got to stay in your room. All evening.- No way.

0:15:36 > 0:15:38RAPS: Yep, yep, it's just so typical

0:15:38 > 0:15:41Yep, yep, yep, it's just so typical

0:15:41 > 0:15:43Just so typical, just so typical

0:15:43 > 0:15:46Yep, yep, yep, it's just so typical

0:15:46 > 0:15:48He must think I'm five years old

0:15:48 > 0:15:50Tryin' to send me to my room As if I've been told

0:15:50 > 0:15:53With some authority And a big put-down

0:15:53 > 0:15:55When in actuality He's a six-foot clown

0:15:55 > 0:15:58Just cos he's older than I am He ain't the boss of me

0:15:58 > 0:16:00That'd be like Taking orders from Ryan

0:16:00 > 0:16:03Thinks that he's all man So he can pull rank

0:16:03 > 0:16:06When I know He ain't running with a full tank

0:16:06 > 0:16:08Cos if he really thinks I don't understand

0:16:08 > 0:16:11His underhand little plan Then he must be mad

0:16:11 > 0:16:13It's obvious in my room's Where he wants me

0:16:13 > 0:16:15So he gets some time alone With Miss Poppy

0:16:15 > 0:16:18He can't lock me in here It's time for him to learn

0:16:18 > 0:16:20He wants something Well, I want something in return

0:16:20 > 0:16:24You see, an only child Might find this stuff bizarre

0:16:24 > 0:16:26But the fact is That's how big brothers are

0:16:26 > 0:16:28Yep, yep, it's just so typical

0:16:28 > 0:16:30Wouldn't expect this From this individual

0:16:30 > 0:16:33- Irritating.- Hypocrite - Frustrating.- Halfwit

0:16:33 > 0:16:36- Snivelling, in a word, sibling - In a word, sibling

0:16:36 > 0:16:37It's like he's five years old

0:16:37 > 0:16:40Do I have to print a sign Typed in bold

0:16:40 > 0:16:43Josh, stay out of my face Overcrowding my space

0:16:43 > 0:16:45I really wish I could have found him a place

0:16:45 > 0:16:47Of his own, like, you know A little kennel on the balcony

0:16:47 > 0:16:50We could keep him there And only let him out to feed

0:16:50 > 0:16:52I'm allowed to dream Just for a minute

0:16:52 > 0:16:55How peaceful my world would be Without him in it

0:16:55 > 0:16:58Ever since he was born, man He's always there

0:16:58 > 0:17:00Turn around and he's there Turn around, he's there

0:17:00 > 0:17:02See, he's just like the air All over me

0:17:02 > 0:17:05Except he doesn't help me breathe He's choking me

0:17:05 > 0:17:08Now, he knows I need to act Like it's my flat

0:17:08 > 0:17:10And lock him up, too He ain't gonna like that

0:17:10 > 0:17:12See, an only child Might find this stuff bizarre

0:17:12 > 0:17:15But the fact is That's how little brothers are

0:17:15 > 0:17:17Yep, yep, it's just so typical

0:17:17 > 0:17:20Wouldn't expect less From this individual

0:17:20 > 0:17:22- Doughnut.- Flapjack - Drainpipe.- Backchat

0:17:22 > 0:17:25- Sickening, in a word, sibling - In a word, sibling.

0:17:25 > 0:17:26I'll tell Mum you were planning a party.

0:17:26 > 0:17:29I'll tell Mum you planned to leave me on my own.

0:17:29 > 0:17:31All right, fine, you can have Ryan and Ash round,

0:17:31 > 0:17:34OK? So long as you stay in your room.

0:17:34 > 0:17:37- Right?- Right, deal.- Right.

0:17:37 > 0:17:38Now help me tidy up.

0:17:38 > 0:17:41- DOORBELL RINGS - Right. Go to your room.

0:17:41 > 0:17:45- Don't you want me to get that? - No! No, just go to your room, Josh.

0:17:45 > 0:17:49All right, all right. Keep your wig on.

0:17:49 > 0:17:52DOORBELL RINGS REPEATEDLY

0:17:56 > 0:17:58Hi.

0:17:59 > 0:18:01Sorry, I was just...

0:18:01 > 0:18:04tidying up. Come through.

0:18:09 > 0:18:11Have a seat.

0:18:18 > 0:18:21- Uh, drink? - A glass of wine would be lovely.

0:18:21 > 0:18:23- LAUGHS:- Oui!

0:18:23 > 0:18:25I'll just, uh...

0:18:25 > 0:18:28open up...le bottle.

0:18:29 > 0:18:31Uh...

0:18:33 > 0:18:35This is nice.

0:18:35 > 0:18:37Uh, thanks.

0:18:37 > 0:18:40It's not how I imagined your place.

0:18:40 > 0:18:42Oh, well...

0:18:42 > 0:18:44I've only just moved in, you know?

0:18:44 > 0:18:48So it's taking me a while to get it sorted.

0:18:51 > 0:18:53Back in a sec.

0:18:53 > 0:18:56I've just got to... Um...

0:18:56 > 0:18:58Back in a sec.

0:19:01 > 0:19:02Yeah.

0:19:04 > 0:19:06I just remembered. You don't live here.

0:19:07 > 0:19:09- What?!- You don't live here.

0:19:09 > 0:19:14I live here, you live somewhere else. With Mum.

0:19:14 > 0:19:16But you're staying here, at my flat.

0:19:16 > 0:19:18OK? Got it?

0:19:26 > 0:19:30These are interesting. What's the story behind these?

0:19:31 > 0:19:34Uh, I won them. In... In a bet.

0:19:34 > 0:19:38Yeah, I keep meaning to get rid of them,

0:19:38 > 0:19:42but, um... I just haven't. Yet.

0:19:42 > 0:19:44So, um... Where were we?

0:19:48 > 0:19:51- Hi, Miss.- Hello, Josh.

0:19:51 > 0:19:54Hello, Josh.

0:19:54 > 0:19:57I thought you said you'd rather be spending some time in your room.

0:19:57 > 0:20:02Yeah, but remember, Nathan. This is your flat. I don't have a room.

0:20:02 > 0:20:04That's right.

0:20:04 > 0:20:06Well, you're welcome to watch the film with us,

0:20:06 > 0:20:09- but you might find it a bit boring. - Oh, no, Miss.

0:20:09 > 0:20:12I think this'll be very, VERY interesting.

0:20:12 > 0:20:15Well, you probably won't even like it, Josh, you know?

0:20:15 > 0:20:18I mean, you might find it a little bit hard to understand.

0:20:18 > 0:20:21What, with me not being able to talk French?

0:20:21 > 0:20:23Like you?

0:20:24 > 0:20:27Yeah, that's right.

0:20:27 > 0:20:30Well, it's a good job you can because there's no subtitles.

0:20:30 > 0:20:32You're going to have to translate.

0:20:32 > 0:20:35Nice one. Stick it on.

0:20:38 > 0:20:40FRENCH SPEECH FROM TV

0:20:40 > 0:20:42My cards.

0:20:44 > 0:20:46I am...a farmer.

0:20:48 > 0:20:50It's time.

0:20:50 > 0:20:54Mayonnaise...on a rind.

0:20:54 > 0:20:56HE SNORTS BACK LAUGHTER

0:20:56 > 0:20:58But two can play at that game.

0:20:58 > 0:21:01HE LAUGHS

0:21:02 > 0:21:04Ooh, yes. Several.

0:21:04 > 0:21:08- This isn't how I remember it. - Oh, it is great.

0:21:08 > 0:21:11Look, maybe we should try something else.

0:21:11 > 0:21:14DOORBELL RINGS Oh, that'll be Ryan and Ash.

0:21:14 > 0:21:19- Oh, right.- Yeah, I said he could bring a couple of mates over,

0:21:19 > 0:21:23- you know, make him feel at home. - That's fine, it's your flat.- Yeah.

0:21:23 > 0:21:25Yes, it is my flat.

0:21:25 > 0:21:29And it's nice to give the kids somewhere where they can hang out.

0:21:30 > 0:21:33Welcome to my brother's flat.

0:21:33 > 0:21:34Professor.

0:21:34 > 0:21:37Uh... Yeah, make yourselves at home.

0:21:37 > 0:21:41It's a lovely place you've got here, sir.

0:21:41 > 0:21:43You've got some, uh...

0:21:43 > 0:21:46Some lovely...dolls.

0:21:46 > 0:21:48Ah, wicked.

0:21:48 > 0:21:50Who made the lasagne?

0:21:50 > 0:21:51Well, must have been my brother,

0:21:51 > 0:21:54considering the fact that it is his kitchen.

0:21:54 > 0:21:57Yeah. Yes, it was. Um...

0:21:57 > 0:22:01And I made it for me and Miss Poppy, actually, Ash.

0:22:02 > 0:22:05Mm. Well, it's very nice.

0:22:05 > 0:22:08- Well done, sir. - Ryan? Wh-where are you going?

0:22:08 > 0:22:12- I'm just going to the loo.- N-no, but you don't know where it is.- What?

0:22:12 > 0:22:14- (You don't know where it is.)- No.

0:22:14 > 0:22:17I don't, actually.

0:22:17 > 0:22:20Cos I've never been to your flat before, obviously.

0:22:20 > 0:22:22So, I'll...

0:22:22 > 0:22:25- Is it in here?- Yeah.- Really?

0:22:25 > 0:22:27Wow. Lucky guess, huh?

0:22:27 > 0:22:29Mm.

0:22:29 > 0:22:31This is delicious.

0:22:31 > 0:22:33Give me that. Argh!

0:22:33 > 0:22:35- Oh!- Be careful with that, sir, uh...

0:22:35 > 0:22:38It's...very hot.

0:22:38 > 0:22:42- What a muffin.- All right, you made your point. Now get 'em out of here.

0:22:42 > 0:22:45- Maybe I should leave you to it. - No, Mel... There's lasagne.

0:22:45 > 0:22:48DOORBELL RINGS

0:22:48 > 0:22:51- Oh, cool. That'll be the others. - What others?

0:22:51 > 0:22:55When you said come round, you meant the party was back on, yeah?

0:22:55 > 0:22:57I'll get rid of 'em.

0:22:57 > 0:23:00ROWDY VOICES

0:23:00 > 0:23:03- Sorry, party's cancelled. - Josh?! Let us in!

0:23:04 > 0:23:08Josh, what're you doing?! I'm invited, you have to let me in.

0:23:08 > 0:23:11This party's rubbish, Josh Carter. Why is it in a corridor?

0:23:11 > 0:23:13- It's, like, worse than wasps.- Chill.

0:23:13 > 0:23:16They were never going to make their way past me.

0:23:16 > 0:23:18DOORBELL RINGS REPEATEDLY

0:23:22 > 0:23:24MOB CHEERS

0:23:27 > 0:23:29Like I said, I think it's important

0:23:29 > 0:23:32to give them a space somewhere they can express themselves.

0:23:32 > 0:23:35MUSIC BLARES

0:23:37 > 0:23:42- Sir? Do you live here?- Yes? - Do you live here on your own?- Yeah.

0:23:42 > 0:23:44So whose is this?

0:23:44 > 0:23:47LAUGHTER

0:23:47 > 0:23:49Gross. Have you got man boobs, sir?

0:23:49 > 0:23:51No...

0:23:51 > 0:23:55I told you to get rid of them. Why did you let them in?

0:23:55 > 0:23:59I didn't let 'em in! This is your flat, sort it out yourself.

0:23:59 > 0:24:03Oh, great, well, thanks a lot(!) That's a massive help. Massive.

0:24:03 > 0:24:06Right. All right, everyone, look. Look. Shh, shh.

0:24:06 > 0:24:09Is this your handbag, sir?

0:24:09 > 0:24:13- LAUGHTER - Is this your passport, sir?

0:24:13 > 0:24:16- LAUGHTER - Is this you dressed as a woman, sir?

0:24:16 > 0:24:19All right, hey, give me that.

0:24:19 > 0:24:21Oh, no!

0:24:21 > 0:24:24All over your mum's lovely new carpet.

0:24:24 > 0:24:27- Oh, sorry. - I thought this was your flat, sir?

0:24:27 > 0:24:31Why did you say it was your flat if it was actually your mum's?

0:24:31 > 0:24:34- Hello, the Carter residen... - Yeah, Mum.

0:24:34 > 0:24:36Mum, hi, hi. Yeah.

0:24:36 > 0:24:39A what? What? Strange girl? Oh, no.

0:24:39 > 0:24:42That was just Ryan. Yeah, you know h-how he gets sometimes, yeah.

0:24:42 > 0:24:46Yeah, so, uh...what's up?

0:24:46 > 0:24:47Oh, the passport?

0:24:47 > 0:24:51Ha-ha, yeah. Yeah, all right, yeah. Love you, too.

0:24:51 > 0:24:54- GUESTS:- Aw!- Bye-bye, yeah.

0:24:54 > 0:24:56She'll be here in the next five minutes.

0:24:56 > 0:24:59- CHEERING - All right, everybody out!

0:24:59 > 0:25:03- You heard the man. - Like, serious, that is so lame.

0:25:03 > 0:25:05Face, bothered? I'm not bothered, get out.

0:25:05 > 0:25:07- Out.- You're not staying here, mate.

0:25:10 > 0:25:13Goodnight.

0:25:16 > 0:25:19Are you sure you don't want me to stay and help?

0:25:19 > 0:25:23No. No, don't worry about it. We'll be fine, honestly. You go.

0:25:24 > 0:25:25OK, well, good luck.

0:25:25 > 0:25:28Thanks.

0:25:28 > 0:25:31- And, uh...about tonight.- I, um...

0:25:31 > 0:25:33Listen, it's fine. I lived at home myself

0:25:33 > 0:25:35- when I first started teaching.- Yeah?

0:25:35 > 0:25:40Well, I didn't cook that lasagne either, um...

0:25:40 > 0:25:42I knew it.

0:25:42 > 0:25:45- And, uh, can't speak French. - Kind of guessed.

0:25:45 > 0:25:48Yeah. And... I'm an idiot.

0:25:50 > 0:25:51You're a funny idiot, though.

0:25:53 > 0:25:57- Bye, Josh.- Bye, Miss.

0:25:59 > 0:26:01Yo. Earth calling Nathan. >

0:26:11 > 0:26:13VACUUM CLEANER WHINES

0:26:17 > 0:26:22Oh, man. I'm never going to have a party again, trust me.

0:26:22 > 0:26:26You know what? On that point, and that point alone, I do.

0:26:27 > 0:26:30DOOR BANGS

0:26:32 > 0:26:34- FRENCH SPEECH FROM TV - Hey, Mrs Carter.

0:26:34 > 0:26:36- Hey, Mum.- Hey, Mum.- Hi.

0:26:41 > 0:26:43DOOR BANGS

0:26:50 > 0:26:55By the way, when I get back, you'd better have a very good explanation.

0:26:55 > 0:26:58- For what?- For why things are way too tidy in here

0:26:58 > 0:27:03and you four are sat there watching a black-and-white film in French.

0:27:09 > 0:27:12- Man, she is good.- Yup.

0:27:20 > 0:27:22- RAPS: You can't live with 'em - And you can't kick 'em out

0:27:22 > 0:27:24When they're up They rub it in your face

0:27:24 > 0:27:25Kick you when you're down

0:27:25 > 0:27:27- But when no-one understands them - You know what they're on about

0:27:27 > 0:27:30- Always gonna be around - Gotta find the common ground

0:27:30 > 0:27:34- If you know so much about me - If you know so much about me

0:27:34 > 0:27:35- Where do I go from here - Where do I go from here

0:27:35 > 0:27:37- If you see 'em everyday - You can never get away

0:27:37 > 0:27:40Only time that you're the boss? 4 o'clock.