0:00:06 > 0:00:09# Where do you go when you know nobody can understand you?
0:00:09 > 0:00:12# When it's just too much to handle
0:00:12 > 0:00:15# What you do when you end up somewhere you never planned to?
0:00:15 > 0:00:17# Wash that stress out like it was shampoo
0:00:17 > 0:00:19# You should stay, it can change
0:00:19 > 0:00:22# There's good days and bad days
0:00:22 > 0:00:26# But one day down the line it's time for the show to stop
0:00:26 > 0:00:28# So the only time is now, 4 o'clock. #
0:00:33 > 0:00:34Ah! Nathan!
0:00:34 > 0:00:36Ow! What is wrong with you?
0:00:36 > 0:00:40I'll tell you what's wrong with me. What is all this stuff?!
0:00:40 > 0:00:41Hey, hey, careful, man!
0:00:41 > 0:00:44Those are the turntables DJ Yowser gave me!
0:00:44 > 0:00:45THE DJ Yowser.
0:00:47 > 0:00:49Hey, hey! Never touch the needle.
0:00:49 > 0:00:51Don't worry, I'm not. It's not 1986! Get 'em out.
0:00:51 > 0:00:53Those are collectors' items!
0:00:53 > 0:00:56- Only thing they're collecting is dust!- You can talk!
0:00:56 > 0:00:59I can hardly get to my clothes cos of all your junk.
0:01:02 > 0:01:05- What is this stuff? GASPS:- Mr Huggles!
0:01:07 > 0:01:10Look, what I'm trying to say is
0:01:10 > 0:01:14one day all this stuff will need to go where it's meant to be.
0:01:14 > 0:01:16In a bin bag.
0:01:18 > 0:01:20MUTTERS: I'll stick you in a bin bag.
0:01:24 > 0:01:27THEY PLAY GREENSLEEVES OUT OF TUNE
0:02:06 > 0:02:08OK! Good.
0:02:08 > 0:02:11It needs some work, but that's why we're here.
0:02:11 > 0:02:15Why don't you all turn to page 17 in your books?
0:02:15 > 0:02:17OK, well, it's going to be quite difficult,
0:02:17 > 0:02:20but I think you're going to like this one.
0:02:20 > 0:02:22I thought if we can get it done properly,
0:02:22 > 0:02:25we could do it for the parents' assembly next week.
0:02:25 > 0:02:28So, if you can all take a look at it tonight...
0:02:28 > 0:02:30- RAPS:- I been two years here,
0:02:30 > 0:02:32Nothing ain't changed, wonder how it used to be back in the day
0:02:32 > 0:02:34When a four-string bass really had four strings
0:02:34 > 0:02:35When the little jingle bell had a few more rings
0:02:35 > 0:02:38The clarinet kinda sounds like an old cow
0:02:38 > 0:02:40The triangle's not even a triangle now
0:02:40 > 0:02:42Tragic, this is like a granddad's attic
0:02:42 > 0:02:44If it's ever going to change it's going to need magic
0:02:44 > 0:02:45Or a dude on a mission
0:02:45 > 0:02:47Someone with a super-clever view or a vision
0:02:47 > 0:02:51It's the only room in school with a heart and look at it
0:02:51 > 0:02:52The whole place falling apart
0:02:52 > 0:02:53If it was up to me this room would be an arena
0:02:53 > 0:02:56The kids would perform, Byron would be the cleaner
0:02:56 > 0:02:58And we'd party from sun up to sunset
0:02:58 > 0:03:01Have the whole world dance to my drum kit.
0:03:15 > 0:03:16Miss!
0:03:16 > 0:03:18GIRL SCREAMS
0:03:18 > 0:03:19BELL RINGS
0:03:19 > 0:03:21OK, file out slowly, please, everyone. Don't run!
0:03:21 > 0:03:23Fire!
0:03:23 > 0:03:26OK, can we all stay in our lines, please?
0:03:26 > 0:03:28We should only be a few more minutes.
0:03:28 > 0:03:31Miss, can I be real to you for a sec?
0:03:31 > 0:03:32As opposed to...
0:03:32 > 0:03:34Your music class is probably the only one
0:03:34 > 0:03:38where I've never listened to my iPod, eaten nachos,
0:03:38 > 0:03:41or made farting noises using hand suction and body parts.
0:03:41 > 0:03:42High praise, indeed.
0:03:42 > 0:03:45But the equipment is so old
0:03:45 > 0:03:48so it's kind of like an ancient history class!
0:03:48 > 0:03:52- How about we get some new equipment? - Everybody back in!
0:03:53 > 0:03:56Check it out, it's the XL700.
0:03:56 > 0:04:00A drum machine that you can programme beats into it
0:04:00 > 0:04:01and link it up to a computer.
0:04:01 > 0:04:05It's not that simple. £600!
0:04:05 > 0:04:08Actually, it's £599.99.
0:04:08 > 0:04:10Well, you seem to have done the maths,
0:04:10 > 0:04:13maybe you can calculate how we get to that amount from zero.
0:04:24 > 0:04:27Oi, funny, innit?
0:04:27 > 0:04:29What is?
0:04:29 > 0:04:32How you're always tidy at work, but you're messy at home.
0:04:32 > 0:04:35It's called priorities.
0:04:35 > 0:04:37I couldn't imagine if a rubber went missing(!)
0:04:37 > 0:04:39Look, I had an idea.
0:04:39 > 0:04:42One big communal rubber?
0:04:42 > 0:04:45No, you lead head, about raising money.
0:04:45 > 0:04:48Since when were you into doing anything charitable?
0:04:48 > 0:04:50Since Teneisha's keyboard turned into a barbecue.
0:04:50 > 0:04:53The music department needs love... and cash.
0:04:53 > 0:04:55I need to raise money for some new kit.
0:04:55 > 0:04:58So now you want to raise money? How?
0:04:58 > 0:04:59Breakdancing for change?
0:04:59 > 0:05:01HE CHUCKLES
0:05:02 > 0:05:0643, 44, 40...
0:05:06 > 0:05:1317, 21, 80, 82, 95.
0:05:16 > 0:05:19Do you remember that programme with those crusty old dudes
0:05:19 > 0:05:22that were buying items with arm signs and...
0:05:22 > 0:05:26Bargain Hunt? You said it was like watching Grandad Yoga.
0:05:26 > 0:05:30Yeah, but imagine if it was for young cool people.
0:05:30 > 0:05:32Maybe even people in your age group.
0:05:32 > 0:05:35And all the money goes to the music department?
0:05:35 > 0:05:37- Like an auction? - What's an auction?
0:05:37 > 0:05:40- It's what you just described. - Oh, OK, so you can help me?
0:05:40 > 0:05:42- Why would I do that? - Miss Poppy'd like it.
0:05:42 > 0:05:45- Shut up. - She would! She likes you.
0:05:45 > 0:05:49Plus, you're always going on about how you need to make an impact here.
0:05:49 > 0:05:51This is your chance!
0:05:51 > 0:05:54Or you could spend the rest of your days counting rubbers.
0:05:54 > 0:05:5956, 72, 94...
0:06:05 > 0:06:07RAPS: What's the point in being here if I never make a difference?
0:06:07 > 0:06:10What's the point of speaking clear if nobody ever listens?
0:06:10 > 0:06:12Do I wanna be a mouse or a man who believes
0:06:12 > 0:06:15Cos I feel like I got whiskers and an obsession with cheese
0:06:15 > 0:06:17Got a brother who's a kid and bigger go-getter than me
0:06:17 > 0:06:20And I'm busy losing count here on rubber 23
0:06:20 > 0:06:23Am I a fraud when I scrawl my name on the whiteboard?
0:06:23 > 0:06:26Saying I'm a grown-up? Maybe I should own up
0:06:26 > 0:06:28Come clean, tell the whole school the truth
0:06:28 > 0:06:31That I'm a youth in an old man's shoes
0:06:31 > 0:06:33That our mum makes the same boxed lunch
0:06:33 > 0:06:36And I sleep in a lame top bunk
0:06:36 > 0:06:38Not a boy any more I'm a man now
0:06:38 > 0:06:42Time to act like the teacher I am now, no time for chit-chat
0:06:42 > 0:06:45Just act quick and get back out there
0:06:45 > 0:06:47Nathan, make an impact!
0:06:48 > 0:06:51It's a great way of raising money for the department.
0:06:51 > 0:06:54Who's getting money for their department?
0:06:54 > 0:06:57It's for the music room, it's pretty run down.
0:06:57 > 0:06:58Have you seen the ICT room?
0:06:58 > 0:07:01There's only one keyboard left with all the letters.
0:07:01 > 0:07:04We were thinking specifically just music room.
0:07:04 > 0:07:08- If there's any cash, Year 7s could use a bit.- They could.
0:07:08 > 0:07:11Hold on. This is something I wanted to discuss with Mr Byron.
0:07:11 > 0:07:14- What was? - His idea to hold an auction
0:07:14 > 0:07:17- to raise money for the school. - Hmm, an auction.
0:07:17 > 0:07:22- We could do it at the next parents' assembly on Friday night.- Yeah...
0:07:22 > 0:07:26Selling what, precisely?
0:07:26 > 0:07:29Um, well... How about selling us?
0:07:29 > 0:07:32We could be on sale for different things
0:07:32 > 0:07:35like 18 holes with you at your golf club.
0:07:35 > 0:07:40- Oh, if I must. - Piano lessons with me.
0:07:40 > 0:07:43Miss Andress could design you a website, and Mr Carter...
0:07:45 > 0:07:50- ..could be your butler for 24 hours. - Butler? Why am I a manservant?
0:07:50 > 0:07:53We'd all be servants to some extent.
0:07:53 > 0:07:56- Yeah, but I'll literally be one. - There may be something in this.
0:07:56 > 0:07:58Great. Let's do it.
0:07:59 > 0:08:01Thinks on her feet, that one.
0:08:01 > 0:08:04If only more of us could be a bit like that.
0:08:12 > 0:08:16- How come you missed ICT? - G & T, my friend.
0:08:16 > 0:08:18Gifted and Talented.
0:08:18 > 0:08:21They've put me in an advanced learning class.
0:08:21 > 0:08:23I've been in one of them.
0:08:23 > 0:08:26When they take you out of class and you get, like, Play-Doh?
0:08:28 > 0:08:29Well, congratulations.
0:08:29 > 0:08:33Now you can hang out with those cool, super-smart kids
0:08:33 > 0:08:37who always make jokes about algebra and snort milk when they laugh.
0:08:37 > 0:08:39You're just jealous
0:08:39 > 0:08:42of my brains, my good looks, my success with women...
0:08:42 > 0:08:44Women? Yeah, right!
0:08:44 > 0:08:48OK, so how come the new girl's blatantly been giving me the eye?
0:08:48 > 0:08:49She's out of your league.
0:08:49 > 0:08:51I bet you haven't even talked to her.
0:08:51 > 0:08:53I will though.
0:08:53 > 0:08:56- She doesn't speak English. - Why, where's she from?
0:08:56 > 0:08:59- Madagascar.- Really?
0:08:59 > 0:09:02- Yeah. I heard some girls talking about her.- There you go.
0:09:02 > 0:09:04How are you going to talk to her now...genius?
0:09:04 > 0:09:06Well, um...
0:09:06 > 0:09:08Tell you what,
0:09:08 > 0:09:11you could start by saying...
0:09:11 > 0:09:14by saying, "Tiggy wappo".
0:09:14 > 0:09:17- Excuse me?- Yeah, yeah.
0:09:17 > 0:09:21That's how they say hello in Madagascar. "Tiggy wappo".
0:09:21 > 0:09:24- How'd you know that? - Discovery Channel.
0:09:24 > 0:09:25What would you care?
0:09:25 > 0:09:28You've not got the guts to speak to her anyway.
0:09:28 > 0:09:33OK, fine. I'll show you the true meaning of gifted and talented.
0:09:33 > 0:09:36Tiggy wappo? Where did you learn that?
0:09:36 > 0:09:40I didn't. I'm pranking him, man. He thinks he so smart...
0:09:40 > 0:09:42Let's see how smart Sharmilla thinks he is!
0:09:42 > 0:09:44Know what I mean?
0:09:45 > 0:09:46No.
0:09:49 > 0:09:52Hey, some good ideas there.
0:09:52 > 0:09:54I don't know if I can be the butler.
0:09:54 > 0:09:57I really need these kids to respect me.
0:09:57 > 0:10:00You can't back out now, I bet you will raise tons of cash.
0:10:00 > 0:10:04- I don't know.- Come on, there's nothing to be afraid of.
0:10:04 > 0:10:08We'll put you in a swanky suit, you'll get snapped up.
0:10:08 > 0:10:10Probably by some gorgeous girl.
0:10:14 > 0:10:18Hey. Er... Tiggy wappo?
0:10:18 > 0:10:20THEY GIGGLE
0:10:29 > 0:10:31Hmm. Maybe you should work on your accent.
0:10:31 > 0:10:34It did say it was one of the tougher to learn.
0:10:34 > 0:10:36Oh, yeah?
0:10:38 > 0:10:40What else did it say?
0:10:40 > 0:10:44Tell you what, let me watch it on Catch Up tonight,
0:10:44 > 0:10:46- I'll give you gold tomorrow. - Thanks, man.
0:10:46 > 0:10:51- Hey, bruv.- Hey.- How did it go with Byron and the auction idea?
0:10:51 > 0:10:55- OK, Byron is going to announce it this afternoon.- So you did it?
0:10:55 > 0:10:57Kind of.
0:10:57 > 0:11:01It's changed a bit, now the teachers are going to be auctioned.
0:11:01 > 0:11:06- Everyone's selling a personal service for the day.- What's yours?
0:11:06 > 0:11:08- Butler.- Butler!
0:11:08 > 0:11:11You'll be there in a tux and little white gloves like,
0:11:11 > 0:11:13"Dinner is served."
0:11:13 > 0:11:15All right. It's not that funny for me.
0:11:15 > 0:11:17I should never have let Miss Poppy talk me into it.
0:11:17 > 0:11:20- This was Miss Poppy's idea?- Yes. - Why are you so worried?
0:11:20 > 0:11:23- She'll probably be the one to buy you.- You think?- Yes.
0:11:23 > 0:11:25Just like I said, she likes you.
0:11:25 > 0:11:28Well, I hope she likes me enough to pay above the odds.
0:11:28 > 0:11:31- We need to raise ten times as much now.- What?
0:11:31 > 0:11:32The meeting got away from me,
0:11:32 > 0:11:35now every department gets a share of the cash.
0:11:35 > 0:11:38It'll be spread too thin for the place it's needed the most.
0:11:38 > 0:11:39I got the ball rolling.
0:11:39 > 0:11:42But you let it roll all the way down the hill.
0:11:42 > 0:11:45A couple of old, mouldy teachers won't help raise the cash we need.
0:11:45 > 0:11:47What are you going to do?
0:11:47 > 0:11:49What else? I've got to get involved.
0:11:49 > 0:11:51It's about time I beefed this sale up.
0:11:51 > 0:11:53BELL RINGS
0:11:59 > 0:12:03I want to hear about your aspirations,
0:12:03 > 0:12:07where you see yourselves in five years' time. Agnes?
0:12:07 > 0:12:09Actually, sir,
0:12:09 > 0:12:12there's a rumour going round, not spread by me,
0:12:12 > 0:12:16that you're up for sale in this auction on Friday.
0:12:16 > 0:12:19I heard you were proper up for sale as a maid or something.
0:12:19 > 0:12:20A butler, actually.
0:12:20 > 0:12:24- Well, can anyone buy you? - For the right price, yes.
0:12:24 > 0:12:27I'm going to buy you and then put my foot on you like a stool,
0:12:27 > 0:12:32and not wash my feet and your nose will get fumed up with foot fungus.
0:12:32 > 0:12:35Well, it's a good thing you won't be able to afford me.
0:12:35 > 0:12:36CLASS: Oooh!
0:12:36 > 0:12:39Well, sir, I've got 50p on me right now.
0:12:39 > 0:12:40THEY LAUGH
0:12:40 > 0:12:41BELL RINGS
0:12:41 > 0:12:43All right, listen,
0:12:43 > 0:12:46don't forget there are other things to buy on Friday.
0:12:46 > 0:12:50Lots of cool options you could bid for,
0:12:50 > 0:12:52you know, other than just me.
0:12:53 > 0:12:55I'm toast, aren't I?
0:13:04 > 0:13:07This Friday... Sorry.
0:13:07 > 0:13:10OK. Let's relax and try again.
0:13:12 > 0:13:15What if one of these kids buys me on Friday?
0:13:15 > 0:13:18I have had half of them in detention all term.
0:13:18 > 0:13:21It would be like the revenge of the fugs.
0:13:21 > 0:13:24I don't think any of them are going to outbid an adult.
0:13:24 > 0:13:30Maybe. But maybe no adult is going to bid for me.
0:13:30 > 0:13:32When you're not hyperventilating,
0:13:32 > 0:13:36- I'm sure you're an attractive prospect.- Really?- Really.
0:13:39 > 0:13:42- Go home, Nathan.- Attractive.
0:13:46 > 0:13:48Hey, man. What do you doing?
0:13:48 > 0:13:52I realised that everyone has something old that they don't need
0:13:52 > 0:13:54that someone else might want, right?
0:13:54 > 0:13:57So, I'm adding some new prizes for the auction.
0:13:57 > 0:14:03- Taking it seriously. I respect that. - Well, it's just like you said.
0:14:03 > 0:14:06Priorities. You got to give up something old, to get something new.
0:14:06 > 0:14:09- You're right.- Oh, Miss Poppy is coming over later
0:14:09 > 0:14:12with a little van to pick up some stuff.
0:14:12 > 0:14:15- Mel is coming here?- Yeah.
0:14:15 > 0:14:18Just going to take a shower, yeah?
0:14:18 > 0:14:21So, you think this is a good idea?
0:14:21 > 0:14:24- Yeah, yeah, man, all good.- Nice one.
0:14:30 > 0:14:31Nice one.
0:14:32 > 0:14:36- Morning, Lame-ohs. What's new?- Since yesterday?
0:14:36 > 0:14:39Well, we're 24 hours older and you're 24 per cent more annoying.
0:14:39 > 0:14:42- Did you watch that thing again for me?- What?
0:14:42 > 0:14:46- Oh, yes. Yeah.- And?
0:14:46 > 0:14:50And I learnt a lot about wooing.
0:14:50 > 0:14:52What is wooing?
0:14:52 > 0:14:54You know, when a guy meets a girl,
0:14:54 > 0:14:56he tries to win her over by wooing her.
0:14:56 > 0:14:58Wooooo!
0:14:58 > 0:15:00- Woooo!- Well?
0:15:00 > 0:15:04Well, Madagascans don't believe in guys buying fancy things
0:15:04 > 0:15:06and acting slick to get girls.
0:15:06 > 0:15:09- In fact, they believe in quite the opposite.- What do you mean?
0:15:09 > 0:15:14Well, they believe a guy should show himself up
0:15:14 > 0:15:17just to prove how much he'd do for the girl.
0:15:17 > 0:15:19Come on.
0:15:19 > 0:15:21Look, I'm just telling you what I've learnt.
0:15:21 > 0:15:24And it's universal. I mean, that guy is willing to dress up
0:15:24 > 0:15:28as a penguin on Friday and hopes to impress that girl.
0:15:32 > 0:15:35Mm. Maybe you're not as dumb as you look.
0:15:37 > 0:15:38- Cheers, mate.- No worries.
0:15:40 > 0:15:42- Woooh!- Stop that.
0:15:42 > 0:15:45Hey, sorry I missed you last night.
0:15:45 > 0:15:48- Yeah, Josh said you were in the bathroom for ages.- I was showering.
0:15:48 > 0:15:52It's not like I was in there for hours on the... Forget it.
0:15:52 > 0:15:55I wanted to say thank you. It's a really nice contribution.
0:15:55 > 0:15:59- What, Josh's stuff? - No, the turntables.
0:15:59 > 0:16:01- My decks?- Yeah.
0:16:01 > 0:16:05- It was really generous. Honestly, I don't know what to say.- No?
0:16:05 > 0:16:07I think I do.
0:16:07 > 0:16:09- You never asked me! - We agreed on it last night.- What?
0:16:09 > 0:16:13I thought you were talking about your junk, not my prized possessions.
0:16:13 > 0:16:17Come on, Nathan. You haven't used those decks in years.
0:16:17 > 0:16:19You never said, "Nate, can I sell your decks?"
0:16:19 > 0:16:24I would have distinctly remembered that and the answer would have been, "Are you nuts?"
0:16:24 > 0:16:27So, now, you're angry at me for doing a good deed.
0:16:27 > 0:16:30- Can I shout something now? - No, Ash, this doesn't concern you.
0:16:32 > 0:16:36Josh, those decks, they meant something to me, man.
0:16:36 > 0:16:41They represented how things used to be for me back in the rap days.
0:16:41 > 0:16:45It made me feel like, I don't know, like I was somebody.
0:16:47 > 0:16:50Wow, I didn't realise, I'm sorry, bro.
0:16:50 > 0:16:53I can talk to Miss Poppy, we can get...
0:16:53 > 0:16:57Forget it. You didn't see her face. She loves that I donated them.
0:16:57 > 0:16:59So, what do we do now?
0:17:01 > 0:17:04- Bid for them back. - Us? That's stupid.- Is it?
0:17:04 > 0:17:09Maybe I can get my decks back, the music room gets money, so win-win.
0:17:09 > 0:17:13Yeah, but we'll look weird trying to buy all our stuff back.
0:17:13 > 0:17:17- All right, then who? - This game is way too hard.
0:17:17 > 0:17:19I can never reach the next level.
0:17:21 > 0:17:24Ash, that's the welcome screen.
0:17:24 > 0:17:27- You need to press start to start playing.- Oh.
0:17:28 > 0:17:30Oh!
0:17:30 > 0:17:32BOTH: Not Ash.
0:17:32 > 0:17:36- Huh?- There's only one other option.
0:17:36 > 0:17:37So, we're cool on this?
0:17:37 > 0:17:40When I nod at you, you raise the spoon to bid
0:17:40 > 0:17:41and win the decks, yeah?
0:17:41 > 0:17:44Raise the spoon, win the decks. Got it?
0:17:44 > 0:17:47What? Oh, yeah, I win the spoon or something.
0:17:47 > 0:17:52No, bid with the spoon, you're not buying cutlery. Focus, man.
0:17:52 > 0:17:57Yeah, sorry, it's just all of this wooing stuff.
0:17:57 > 0:17:58You can't lose.
0:17:58 > 0:18:01- You really think it will work? - Look, I told you,
0:18:01 > 0:18:04Madagascans love all that stuff. Go and find her.
0:18:04 > 0:18:08- It's starting in a minute. - OK, guys, we're ready for you now.
0:18:08 > 0:18:10- ALL LAUGH Penguin!- Someone looks nervous!
0:18:10 > 0:18:14He's so LOLz. I am so buying him. I'm going to walk him like a poodle.
0:18:14 > 0:18:20So, if you could make your way into the assembly hall sensibly, now.
0:18:21 > 0:18:23I said sensibly!
0:18:35 > 0:18:38See my dog? That's you, that is.
0:18:43 > 0:18:45HE RAPS: Miss Poppy got me properly looking just like a clown
0:18:45 > 0:18:48Got a bunch of kids who hate me ready to buy me now
0:18:48 > 0:18:51If she liked me, she'd buy me, and save me, maybe
0:18:51 > 0:18:55Say she doesn't! Stop being a baby It's just a game, if I play this well
0:18:55 > 0:18:58I could leave with my decks and a date with Mel
0:18:58 > 0:19:00Or I could leave with a year ten bully
0:19:00 > 0:19:02With a whole day of pain planned for me
0:19:02 > 0:19:06The only thing worse than that, well, I know it would be
0:19:06 > 0:19:1024 hours owned by Zoe-Marie That would seem like endless torture
0:19:10 > 0:19:13Imagine if I had to send texts for her
0:19:13 > 0:19:16SHE TALKS REALLY FAST
0:19:16 > 0:19:18And I was like nah and she was like yeah
0:19:18 > 0:19:21And she was like soz, LOL, thank you, babes, two kisses
0:19:22 > 0:19:25Yeah, I'd be more than scared if she wins
0:19:25 > 0:19:27To be fair, man, I wouldn't know where to begin
0:19:27 > 0:19:29With the things that she'd get me to do
0:19:29 > 0:19:32Hey you, yeah, you, scrub poo off my shoe
0:19:32 > 0:19:35No way, cos she'd be seen as the boss of me
0:19:35 > 0:19:37Honestly, all the chaos that she's gonna wreak
0:19:37 > 0:19:39I could start with a "Kick me" sign on
0:19:39 > 0:19:41And end singing a love song to Byron!
0:19:41 > 0:19:47# Ooh-ooh-ooh-ooh ooh-ooh-ooh
0:19:47 > 0:19:50# Yeah. #
0:19:50 > 0:19:54CHILDREN'S LAUGHTER ECHOES
0:20:18 > 0:20:21CHILDREN LAUGH
0:20:21 > 0:20:23< He's gone and done it.
0:20:31 > 0:20:33RYAN: Sharmilla?
0:20:33 > 0:20:35Kadji kodji wip wip,
0:20:35 > 0:20:40hiranki neegee ooh-oohgee!
0:20:41 > 0:20:43What the heck are you doing?
0:20:44 > 0:20:47Hang on a sec, did you just speak English?
0:20:47 > 0:20:50That tends to be the first language of Salford.
0:20:50 > 0:20:51Wait.
0:20:51 > 0:20:54- You're not from Madagascar? - Who told you that?
0:20:54 > 0:20:57Manchester!
0:20:57 > 0:20:59Oh, I could have sworn those girls said Madagascar.
0:20:59 > 0:21:00Ho-ho!
0:21:00 > 0:21:02Sorry for bothering you.
0:21:02 > 0:21:03Wait.
0:21:05 > 0:21:07What's with the outfit?
0:21:07 > 0:21:11- It's just my former friend... - Manchester, Madagascar.
0:21:11 > 0:21:13..made up this nonsense about
0:21:13 > 0:21:16how I should humiliate myself in front of you.
0:21:16 > 0:21:21He said that's how a boy impresses a girl in Madagascar.
0:21:21 > 0:21:23And I felt for it. I know, stupid, right?
0:21:23 > 0:21:26Yeah. But sweet.
0:21:26 > 0:21:27Really?
0:21:27 > 0:21:29Yeah.
0:21:29 > 0:21:34There's a spare seat here. What do you reckon?
0:21:34 > 0:21:37- Yes. Yeah, definitely yes.- Cool.
0:21:37 > 0:21:41Look, just give me two minutes, yeah?
0:21:41 > 0:21:45CHILDREN LAUGH
0:21:45 > 0:21:50So, not as talented and gifted as you thought, eh?
0:21:50 > 0:21:54- But that outfit was genius. - What kind of mate are you?
0:21:54 > 0:21:57What's the point of mates if you can't prank each other?
0:21:57 > 0:22:01Oh, yeah, you're a real comedian. Let's get this auction over with.
0:22:01 > 0:22:04Right. Spoon.
0:22:05 > 0:22:06Cash...
0:22:06 > 0:22:08- Kadji kodji.- Don't push it.
0:22:08 > 0:22:11There's other things I could do with a spoon this big.
0:22:11 > 0:22:15- All right, all right, Ash, give us a seat.- No need, thanks.
0:22:15 > 0:22:19- I'm off to Madagascar. - OK, ladies and gents, here we go.
0:22:19 > 0:22:22No!
0:22:22 > 0:22:25- Good luck.- He's only pulled her. - And happy bidding.
0:22:27 > 0:22:32OK, our final lot before we get on to the teachers,
0:22:32 > 0:22:36uh, it's going to be this set of turntables
0:22:36 > 0:22:39which once belonged to DJ Yowser.
0:22:39 > 0:22:46So, shall we start the bidding at say, £50?
0:22:46 > 0:22:48Anyone?
0:22:53 > 0:22:55Anyone?
0:22:55 > 0:22:57Anyone? No?
0:23:01 > 0:23:03No! No, no, no.
0:23:03 > 0:23:07No, no way. A bid. Great.
0:23:07 > 0:23:11Any advance on that? 70, maybe?
0:23:11 > 0:23:13Anyone, £70? JOSH COUGHS
0:23:13 > 0:23:16Did I hear 65?
0:23:16 > 0:23:21I'm sensing a 60 from this area for some reason.
0:23:22 > 0:23:23No?
0:23:26 > 0:23:28Oh, come on.
0:23:30 > 0:23:33- 51.- We've had the last bid. Move on. - WHISPERS: Ryan!
0:23:33 > 0:23:36RYAN MOUTHS Right. All right.
0:23:36 > 0:23:42Turntables going, going once, going twice.
0:23:42 > 0:23:44BOTH MOUTHING
0:23:44 > 0:23:47- Going twice and a half.- Mr Carter!
0:23:47 > 0:23:49Sold to the lady at the back for £50.
0:23:51 > 0:23:53Uh, what was that all about?
0:23:53 > 0:23:57Mm, let me think(!) Oh, come on, man, what's the point of mates
0:23:57 > 0:23:58if we can't prank each other?
0:24:01 > 0:24:03Well, you've all had a good look at him.
0:24:03 > 0:24:08For 24 hours, Mr Carter will provide all the domestic duties
0:24:08 > 0:24:11of a traditional English butler. Spoons at the ready.
0:24:12 > 0:24:16- Ready with your spoon? - Oh, I'm not bidding tonight.- What?
0:24:16 > 0:24:20- I just made a donation beforehand. Good luck.- Oh. Right.
0:24:21 > 0:24:25- Right, then, who will open the bidding?- 50p.
0:24:25 > 0:24:28- Any advance on that?- £10.
0:24:28 > 0:24:32Man, she'll have him walking in the playground in his underpants.
0:24:32 > 0:24:36I can't do this to him. I owe it to him. £50.
0:24:41 > 0:24:42- 60.- 70.
0:24:43 > 0:24:46- £80?- Yeah, 80.- 90.
0:24:46 > 0:24:49- Any advance on 90?- £93.72.
0:24:52 > 0:24:54Going once. Going twice.
0:24:54 > 0:24:56£150.
0:24:56 > 0:25:00- How much?- All for a good cause. Remember?
0:25:00 > 0:25:03£150.
0:25:03 > 0:25:06Going once, going twice.
0:25:06 > 0:25:12Sold to the young man...being hugged on the table over there.
0:25:12 > 0:25:13Ash.
0:25:20 > 0:25:25So, let me get this straight, I've lost my decks and 150 quid,
0:25:25 > 0:25:27is that right?
0:25:27 > 0:25:29Nathan, I'm sorry. I'll pay you back, I promise.
0:25:29 > 0:25:35- Forget it.- No. I want to. I mean it, all right?
0:25:36 > 0:25:40Here you are, heroes, the pair of you. Turntables went for a bargain.
0:25:40 > 0:25:44- Who was that who won them?- I did. That's my friend Ann bidding for me.
0:25:46 > 0:25:49- So, since when were you a DJ? - Since never!
0:25:49 > 0:25:52I'm going to put them in the music department.
0:25:52 > 0:25:57- Alongside the XL700 drum machine? - I hope so. You deserve it.
0:25:57 > 0:25:59Do I?
0:25:59 > 0:26:02Yeah, what with your generous donation and you bidding for him,
0:26:02 > 0:26:05you guys seem really close.
0:26:05 > 0:26:09- Hey, man, look, about the decks, I'm sorry.- You know what? She's right.
0:26:09 > 0:26:13- Huh?- A little bit of generosity goes a long way.
0:26:13 > 0:26:17How much do I use those decks? Hardly at all. Right?
0:26:17 > 0:26:21- And your class will make much more out of them than I did.- Sweet.
0:26:21 > 0:26:23And hey, I told you she likes you.
0:26:28 > 0:26:31So, about this whole auction thing,
0:26:31 > 0:26:36- technically, I own you now.- What?
0:26:36 > 0:26:38And I have another little apology I need to make
0:26:38 > 0:26:41and you could help me out a lot.
0:26:41 > 0:26:43Hm?
0:26:46 > 0:26:47Come on.
0:26:49 > 0:26:51Sir, madam, take a seat.
0:26:51 > 0:26:53Seriously, what is this, Josh?
0:26:53 > 0:26:56- If it's another one of your stupid pranks, I really...- Shhh.
0:26:56 > 0:26:58Just wait, all right?
0:26:58 > 0:27:01Sit down. You're not going to die.
0:27:01 > 0:27:02OK.
0:27:02 > 0:27:04ASH PLAYS THE FLUTE
0:27:04 > 0:27:05Really, Ash? Really?
0:27:05 > 0:27:09Dinner is served.
0:27:11 > 0:27:13What is this? Pizza?
0:27:13 > 0:27:15That will be all, my good man.
0:27:15 > 0:27:19Don't push it. And don't take too long. The caretaker won't keep this place open all night.
0:27:19 > 0:27:23All right, all right. I was just kidding. Can I have a slice?
0:27:27 > 0:27:29Small one.
0:27:46 > 0:27:48- RAP: Can't live with 'em - And you can't kick them out
0:27:48 > 0:27:50When they're up, they rub it in your face
0:27:50 > 0:27:52- Kick you when you're down - But when no-one understands them
0:27:52 > 0:27:55- You know what they're on about - And who's going to be around
0:27:55 > 0:27:56Got to find the common ground
0:27:56 > 0:28:00# If you know so much about me
0:28:00 > 0:28:02# Where do I go from here?
0:28:02 > 0:28:04If I see him every day You can never get away
0:28:04 > 0:28:06Only time that you're the boss, 4 o'clock. 4 o'clock.