0:00:06 > 0:00:09# Where do you go when you know nobody can understand you?
0:00:09 > 0:00:12# When it's just too much to handle?
0:00:12 > 0:00:15# What do you do when you end up somewhere you never planned to?
0:00:15 > 0:00:17# Washed out, stressed out like it was shampoo
0:00:17 > 0:00:20# You should stay It can change
0:00:20 > 0:00:23# There's good days and bad days
0:00:23 > 0:00:26# But one day down the line this time is sure to stop
0:00:26 > 0:00:28# So the only time is now 4 O'Clock
0:00:28 > 0:00:30# 4 O'Clock, 4 O'Clock, 4 O'Clock. #
0:00:32 > 0:00:35"A Bigger Bang: The world's first scientific musical."
0:00:35 > 0:00:39- I wondered if you wanted to come and see it with me.- Ha-ha-ha.
0:00:39 > 0:00:41Wow, Harris, a grotty arts centre
0:00:41 > 0:00:44surrounded by a bunch of mouth-breathing science nerds.
0:00:44 > 0:00:47What a romantic date that isn't.
0:00:47 > 0:00:49Obviously it isn't a date.
0:00:49 > 0:00:50Is it, Dexter?
0:00:51 > 0:00:54No. No, of course not.
0:00:54 > 0:00:55I meant,
0:00:55 > 0:01:00as a school trip. With students. Music and science.
0:01:00 > 0:01:02Bring the departments together.
0:01:02 > 0:01:05Oh, right, so if it was a history or sports-based musical,
0:01:05 > 0:01:07you'd be asking one of us?
0:01:10 > 0:01:12Of course I would. Absolutely.
0:01:12 > 0:01:15I'm very flattered, Mr Harris, but you're really not my type.
0:01:15 > 0:01:16Ha-ha-ha!
0:01:16 > 0:01:17So, what do you reckon?
0:01:18 > 0:01:21OK. Yes.
0:01:21 > 0:01:22Could be fun.
0:01:24 > 0:01:25I'll mention it to the kids.
0:01:29 > 0:01:31A boring theatre thing? Why would anyone want to go to that?
0:01:31 > 0:01:33This says it's educational and fun.
0:01:33 > 0:01:35Cos they're two things that go well together.
0:01:35 > 0:01:39Come on, guys - "A Bigger Bang". I promise we'll have a laugh.
0:01:39 > 0:01:41We don't have to go to the theatre for a bigger bang, Dex.
0:01:41 > 0:01:43We can stay right here for one.
0:01:43 > 0:01:45- DRUM BANGS - Nero, can you not...?
0:01:46 > 0:01:49THEY GASP AND GROAN
0:01:51 > 0:01:54Too...big a bang?
0:02:00 > 0:02:02Last week it was "fish breath".
0:02:02 > 0:02:07The week before that, they were comparing your face to a posterior.
0:02:07 > 0:02:09It's a total breakdown of order.
0:02:09 > 0:02:11Let's not overstate it.
0:02:11 > 0:02:14But you're still no closer to catching the culprit.
0:02:14 > 0:02:17It's only a matter of time before we catch him.
0:02:17 > 0:02:19Or her.
0:02:19 > 0:02:20Let's not be sexist.
0:02:21 > 0:02:24- Did you see who did this? - We just got here!
0:02:24 > 0:02:25Just in time to pay our respects.
0:02:25 > 0:02:29Phantom Sprayer, we, the students of Elmsmere,
0:02:29 > 0:02:30salute you.
0:02:30 > 0:02:32- Deten...!- Miss...
0:02:32 > 0:02:34Mr MacPherson's asked for you.
0:02:34 > 0:02:36Says 9A have locked him outside his classroom.
0:02:36 > 0:02:38Not again...
0:02:40 > 0:02:42Whoever's doing this
0:02:42 > 0:02:44has got mad guts,
0:02:44 > 0:02:46if nothin' else.
0:02:50 > 0:02:52Who was that?
0:02:52 > 0:02:57That's Carson. Eloise Henry well fancies him.
0:02:57 > 0:02:59Everyone fancies him.
0:02:59 > 0:03:00Bunch of sheep.
0:03:00 > 0:03:03What, you don't fancy him?
0:03:03 > 0:03:04Nah.
0:03:04 > 0:03:08Just one of those uber-handsome charming boy-band types.
0:03:08 > 0:03:09Well boring.
0:03:09 > 0:03:13So you were just asking who he was out of random curiosity?
0:03:13 > 0:03:15I just ain't seen him around before, that's all!
0:03:15 > 0:03:18- Why the five million questions? - All right! Bite my head off much?
0:03:21 > 0:03:24BELL RINGS
0:03:31 > 0:03:32Oh!
0:03:37 > 0:03:39SHE GASPS
0:03:39 > 0:03:43Oh, no! I am SO sorry.
0:03:43 > 0:03:44Are you OK?
0:03:46 > 0:03:49Yeah. It's probably my fault. Never look where I'm going.
0:03:53 > 0:03:55I'm Carson, by the way.
0:03:55 > 0:03:56I've noticed you around.
0:03:58 > 0:04:00You're...?
0:04:00 > 0:04:01Clem.
0:04:01 > 0:04:03Awesome name.
0:04:03 > 0:04:05Do you think?
0:04:05 > 0:04:06I hate it.
0:04:06 > 0:04:09It's short for...Clementine.
0:04:09 > 0:04:11Could be worse.
0:04:11 > 0:04:13Could be called Tangerine.
0:04:13 > 0:04:15Then you'd be known as Tange.
0:04:16 > 0:04:17Yeah.
0:04:17 > 0:04:19Dodged a bullet there.
0:04:19 > 0:04:21So, it was cool to meet you,
0:04:21 > 0:04:23Clem with the awesome name.
0:04:23 > 0:04:24I've got to get off to EFAC.
0:04:26 > 0:04:27You know EFAC, right?
0:04:27 > 0:04:29Totally.
0:04:29 > 0:04:32I heard it's meant to be totally awesome.
0:04:32 > 0:04:34I'd love it if you came along.
0:04:34 > 0:04:35Yeah.
0:04:35 > 0:04:37Guess I could.
0:04:48 > 0:04:51Welcome to EFAC, the Elmsmere Fundraising Action Committee.
0:04:54 > 0:04:56Er, why is she here?
0:04:56 > 0:04:58She's a troublemaker.
0:04:58 > 0:05:01Clem wants to get involved and be part of the EFAC team.
0:05:02 > 0:05:03Right, Clem?
0:05:06 > 0:05:10# This is absurd! How could I fancy a school-loving nerd?
0:05:10 > 0:05:12# Frightening! Do I really like him?
0:05:12 > 0:05:15# Deep inside I got two sides fighting: the real me
0:05:15 > 0:05:19# Tough to a T, or the goody-goody I'm pretending to be
0:05:19 > 0:05:21# Am I going to go against all I believe?
0:05:21 > 0:05:24# Just to impress a boy? That's so weak!
0:05:24 > 0:05:26# But maybe that's just what everybody does
0:05:26 > 0:05:28# Aren't you supposed to do anything for love?
0:05:28 > 0:05:31# Go to any lengths, no matter what happens?
0:05:31 > 0:05:33# Fight the biggest battles, slay the biggest dragons
0:05:33 > 0:05:36# Love is a challenge - that's how the game goes
0:05:36 > 0:05:38# Climb any mountain, even volcanoes
0:05:38 > 0:05:41# But how can I sign up to a group that supports the school?
0:05:41 > 0:05:43# That's too much!
0:05:43 > 0:05:47# Oh, I'm just so torn
0:05:47 > 0:05:51# Two sides, both at war
0:05:51 > 0:05:52# Who's going to win?
0:05:52 > 0:05:56# Oh, I'm just so torn
0:05:56 > 0:05:59# Two sides, am I out, am I in
0:05:59 > 0:06:02# And who's going to win? Dunno where to begin!
0:06:02 > 0:06:06# I'll look like an idiot Totally unacceptable, isn't it?
0:06:06 > 0:06:08# But he is really cute
0:06:08 > 0:06:12# Just never assumed this is something that I'd do!
0:06:12 > 0:06:14# It is kinda awkward If I claim to hate the school
0:06:14 > 0:06:15# I can't support it
0:06:15 > 0:06:18# That's torn it there for a start
0:06:18 > 0:06:20# It's like a battle between my head and my heart
0:06:20 > 0:06:22# And real love is something that I could try
0:06:22 > 0:06:25# I mean, hey, at least he's a good guy
0:06:25 > 0:06:27# Plus if I join and I hate it
0:06:27 > 0:06:29# I can tear down the system from inside! #
0:06:29 > 0:06:32- Boom! - EXPLOSION
0:06:32 > 0:06:35Just tell me what I can do to help.
0:06:35 > 0:06:37Help? What?
0:06:37 > 0:06:39Overthrow the system, you anarchist?
0:06:39 > 0:06:41Isobel!
0:06:41 > 0:06:43Sorry, Carson.
0:06:43 > 0:06:46I have got a feeling you're going to fit right in here, Clem.
0:06:46 > 0:06:48Me too.
0:06:54 > 0:06:57Thanks for getting me grounded. I was meant to be at Eli's.
0:06:57 > 0:07:00You should've thought about that before damaging school equipment.
0:07:00 > 0:07:01How could I think about it?
0:07:01 > 0:07:03What happened to that drum was an accident!
0:07:03 > 0:07:07Yeah, well, it's funny how these "accidents" always happen to you!
0:07:07 > 0:07:08Right, I'm going to make a cup of tea.
0:07:08 > 0:07:11And no, I'm not making you one.
0:07:11 > 0:07:12Total botch.
0:07:30 > 0:07:32Oh, yeah!
0:07:37 > 0:07:39CJ Dean's doing a street dance showcase
0:07:39 > 0:07:42the same day that Bigger Bang thing is on.
0:07:42 > 0:07:44I'm so going to go.
0:07:44 > 0:07:46But aren't you grounded for murdering that drum?
0:07:46 > 0:07:49Yeah, but I ain't grounded for educational trips.
0:07:49 > 0:07:52- A street dance showcase is not an educational trip.- No.
0:07:53 > 0:07:55But Dexter's bang thing is.
0:07:55 > 0:07:56Come on, I sign up for that
0:07:56 > 0:07:59and then I can sneak out to watch CJ Dean busting moves.
0:07:59 > 0:08:00Oh, and I need you to sign up too.
0:08:00 > 0:08:02I'll sign up, but I'm not sneaking around.
0:08:02 > 0:08:05I don't need to cause trouble to validate myself,
0:08:05 > 0:08:06thank you very much.
0:08:06 > 0:08:09I only need you to cause a diversion, so I can bunk next door.
0:08:09 > 0:08:12I'll do it. Can I pretend to get stung by a wasp, and then faint?
0:08:12 > 0:08:14Yeah. Knock yourself out.
0:08:14 > 0:08:15Not sure I want to do that.
0:08:17 > 0:08:22Wow. Exactly zero takers for your ridiculously boring trip, Harris.
0:08:22 > 0:08:25Hmm. I guess it'll just be me and Lizzie, then.
0:08:25 > 0:08:26Sort of like...
0:08:26 > 0:08:28a date.
0:08:28 > 0:08:29Gives us that, Dex.
0:08:31 > 0:08:33Ha-ha! Yeah, cosy.
0:08:33 > 0:08:36Just you, Lizzie, and these three idiots.
0:08:43 > 0:08:45When you've done this, there's more in the boys' toilets.
0:08:45 > 0:08:49Do I have to? It smells like something died in there.
0:08:49 > 0:08:51Something big. Like a bull.
0:08:51 > 0:08:52It's your job!
0:08:55 > 0:08:56Is that the list for the trip?
0:08:57 > 0:08:59You'll need more students than this
0:08:59 > 0:09:01if you're borrowing the school minibus.
0:09:01 > 0:09:04It's hardly an effective use of school resources.
0:09:04 > 0:09:06How many? I'm having a bit of trouble.
0:09:06 > 0:09:09Unless ten students sign up, the trip is off.
0:09:09 > 0:09:10Ten.
0:09:13 > 0:09:14Oi.
0:09:14 > 0:09:16She's in a right mood today.
0:09:17 > 0:09:21Suppose it must hack you right off,
0:09:21 > 0:09:23living on a bum farm.
0:09:23 > 0:09:24HE SIGHS
0:09:29 > 0:09:30Late night knit night!
0:09:30 > 0:09:3350p to stay up and do knitting and crocheting,
0:09:33 > 0:09:35then we'll raffle off what we make.
0:09:35 > 0:09:38We should have a kitten day.
0:09:38 > 0:09:41Where we bring kittens to school and people pay to play with them.
0:09:41 > 0:09:42GIGGLING
0:09:42 > 0:09:45Or we could dress up as ponies, skipping and giggling?
0:09:45 > 0:09:48It's just so easy to be sarcastic, isn't it?
0:09:48 > 0:09:50With you lot, yeah!
0:09:50 > 0:09:53You need stuff that normal kids care about.
0:09:53 > 0:09:56Not knitting and kittens.
0:09:56 > 0:09:57OK, Clem.
0:09:57 > 0:09:59Got any ideas?
0:09:59 > 0:10:01Top of my head...
0:10:01 > 0:10:03zombie fest.
0:10:03 > 0:10:05Half the school dress up as zombies
0:10:05 > 0:10:08and the other half have to avoid them,
0:10:08 > 0:10:09like an epic game of tag.
0:10:11 > 0:10:14You really think kids are going to pay to do that sort of thing?
0:10:14 > 0:10:18Trust me - you'll raise more money if you say it's for the kids.
0:10:20 > 0:10:23Inspirational.
0:10:23 > 0:10:24In fact...
0:10:25 > 0:10:28..I've got one really important job you could do for me.
0:10:28 > 0:10:29OK.
0:10:29 > 0:10:32How would you like to be in charge of the next poster campaign?
0:10:32 > 0:10:33Like, design the posters,
0:10:33 > 0:10:35come up with slogans?
0:10:35 > 0:10:36Yeah, I could do that.
0:10:36 > 0:10:39Actually, it's more like putting these posters up
0:10:39 > 0:10:40around the school for me.
0:10:47 > 0:10:49It's called the Washing Machine. It's his most famous move.
0:10:49 > 0:10:51I cannot wait to see it live.
0:10:51 > 0:10:52This is my most famous move.
0:10:52 > 0:10:54- It's called the Squeal Owen. - HE YELPS
0:10:56 > 0:10:58Other hand.
0:10:58 > 0:10:59- Thank you, fans.- Dex, Dex!
0:10:59 > 0:11:01We were just saying we can't wait to go on the trip.
0:11:01 > 0:11:03- We think it's going to be epic. - The trip's off.
0:11:03 > 0:11:07Only you three signed up, and I need ten to fill the minibus.
0:11:07 > 0:11:09Sorry, guys.
0:11:09 > 0:11:12Dexter! Wait! We can do it for you.
0:11:12 > 0:11:14- Do what?- The hard sell.
0:11:14 > 0:11:16We'll fill that minibus for you.
0:11:21 > 0:11:25There is no way you are going to see CJ whatsit.
0:11:25 > 0:11:26How come?
0:11:26 > 0:11:27Well, people aren't going to sign up
0:11:27 > 0:11:31to see some boring, educational, science-y, musical thing.
0:11:33 > 0:11:35- I might.- I mean normal people.
0:11:35 > 0:11:36OK, well...
0:11:38 > 0:11:41- Could I interest you in a school theatre trip?- No.
0:11:41 > 0:11:44What if I said there was crazy psycho clowns?
0:11:44 > 0:11:45As if.
0:11:45 > 0:11:47- Ain't that right, Eli?- Yeah!
0:11:47 > 0:11:49At one point they set themselves on fire
0:11:49 > 0:11:51and there's this wheelbarrow full of walnuts
0:11:51 > 0:11:53and then they shatter it with their teeth.
0:11:55 > 0:11:58Yeah, all right, then.
0:12:04 > 0:12:06If it's a One Direction tribute show,
0:12:06 > 0:12:08why is it called "A Bigger Bang"?
0:12:08 > 0:12:11Cos it's One Direction... but louder?
0:12:15 > 0:12:16Are you going?
0:12:16 > 0:12:18Yes.
0:12:18 > 0:12:19Then I'll pass.
0:12:19 > 0:12:21Shame.
0:12:21 > 0:12:24As an educational trip, it counts towards our grades.
0:12:24 > 0:12:26Give me that.
0:12:31 > 0:12:32SHE SCOFFS
0:12:36 > 0:12:37Clem.
0:12:41 > 0:12:43Unbelievable.
0:12:43 > 0:12:46Some anti-school idiot must've taken down all the posters I put up
0:12:46 > 0:12:49and chucked them in the bin.
0:12:49 > 0:12:52Some people have really got it in for this place.
0:12:52 > 0:12:55Yeah, tell me about it.
0:12:55 > 0:12:57Hey, are you going on this Bigger Bang trip?
0:12:57 > 0:12:59- SCOFFING:- What, the theatre show?
0:12:59 > 0:13:04Yeah. According to Nero Johnson, the proceeds are going towards EFAC.
0:13:05 > 0:13:07I'd love it if you came.
0:13:10 > 0:13:11Aw, what?
0:13:11 > 0:13:13We've been doing this all day and we only got nine.
0:13:13 > 0:13:15That's it, then. No trip.
0:13:15 > 0:13:16Oi!
0:13:20 > 0:13:22Yes!
0:13:29 > 0:13:31Fine. It can go ahead.
0:13:31 > 0:13:32Great! I'll let Miss Baker know.
0:13:32 > 0:13:34It can't be just you and Miss Baker.
0:13:34 > 0:13:36Neither of you are first aiders.
0:13:36 > 0:13:38- I am.- You were.
0:13:38 > 0:13:41Until you threw the first aid dummy out the first-floor window.
0:13:41 > 0:13:43- That was an accident. - And burnt down a school.
0:13:46 > 0:13:48- Mr Nunn.- What?
0:13:48 > 0:13:50You did a first aid course, didn't you?
0:13:50 > 0:13:52Why's that, love? You choking on a cake?
0:13:53 > 0:13:56I need you to go on Mr Harris's school trip.
0:13:56 > 0:13:58Oh, come on! The theatre?!
0:13:58 > 0:14:02I hate all that flouncing about, men in tights pretending to be swans.
0:14:02 > 0:14:03That's the ballet.
0:14:03 > 0:14:06- It's the same thing. - Tough. You're going.
0:14:11 > 0:14:14You've ruined my evening, Harris. I intend on ruining yours.
0:14:25 > 0:14:26Whoa!
0:14:26 > 0:14:29The Phantom Sprayer strikes again.
0:14:29 > 0:14:31The Talentless Sprayer, more like.
0:14:31 > 0:14:33That picture's well shabby.
0:14:33 > 0:14:35They got the right idea, though.
0:14:37 > 0:14:38The paint's still fresh.
0:14:38 > 0:14:41- We must have just missed them. - Unbelievable.
0:14:41 > 0:14:44The disrespect some people have for the authorities.
0:14:44 > 0:14:45Stick it to 'em, I say.
0:14:46 > 0:14:48This is the real weapon of the people.
0:14:56 > 0:15:00- Erm, we just got here. - Do you think I'm stupid?
0:15:00 > 0:15:02You don't really want us to answer that.
0:15:05 > 0:15:09- This is all your fault. - I didn't do this, squid-rag.
0:15:09 > 0:15:11You answered back to Miss Andress.
0:15:11 > 0:15:13Why are you lot cleaning off graffiti?
0:15:13 > 0:15:15Because we enjoy it, obviously.
0:15:15 > 0:15:18Cos Miss Andress thinks we did this.
0:15:18 > 0:15:20She's cancelled your trip.
0:15:20 > 0:15:25- What?!- We ain't allowed to go no more, so not enough people.
0:15:25 > 0:15:27Epic. Cheers, Burton, you massive donkey.
0:15:27 > 0:15:29It weren't me!
0:15:29 > 0:15:33You want your trip to go ahead - you try finding the real Sprayer.
0:15:36 > 0:15:40I can do bird noises too. This is an eagle.
0:15:40 > 0:15:41HE SQUAWKS
0:15:41 > 0:15:43This is a...a finch!
0:15:43 > 0:15:44HE SQUAWKS
0:15:44 > 0:15:47And this is a fl-flemungo!
0:15:47 > 0:15:48- HE SQUAWKS - And this is a...
0:15:49 > 0:15:52- We shouldn't be in here. - Exciting, though, right?
0:15:52 > 0:15:54HE SIGHS
0:15:54 > 0:15:56SQUAWKING CONTINUES IN NEXT ROOM
0:15:59 > 0:16:01Bingo.
0:16:01 > 0:16:03This is so humiliating.
0:16:03 > 0:16:05We're better than this. We're in EFAC.
0:16:05 > 0:16:07Ha, we're not in EFAC.
0:16:07 > 0:16:09Obviously you're not. Me and her are.
0:16:10 > 0:16:16You're in EFAC?! As in EFAC the school-addicted creepoids?
0:16:16 > 0:16:18We're not creepoids!
0:16:18 > 0:16:20You are.
0:16:20 > 0:16:22I've turned a corner.
0:16:22 > 0:16:26I love hanging out with all my new EFAC buddies, right, Belle?
0:16:26 > 0:16:28Aww!
0:16:28 > 0:16:30Look at me!
0:16:31 > 0:16:32Grr!
0:16:34 > 0:16:36LAUGHTER STOPS
0:16:37 > 0:16:40- It's just a cover, all right? - Nothing to do with Carson, then?
0:16:40 > 0:16:42What? Who?
0:16:42 > 0:16:44No. Don't be stupid. I don't like him.
0:16:44 > 0:16:47Look, I'm just trying to channel their funds away
0:16:47 > 0:16:49from the poxy teachers into the hands of us lot.
0:16:49 > 0:16:51That's all.
0:16:51 > 0:16:53Then why have you gone all red?
0:16:53 > 0:16:54What?
0:16:54 > 0:16:55No, I ain't.
0:16:55 > 0:16:57It's just really hot in here.
0:16:57 > 0:16:59She does like him.
0:16:59 > 0:17:01I know. She should totally ask him out.
0:17:05 > 0:17:07That's your big plan?
0:17:07 > 0:17:09Fingerprints?
0:17:09 > 0:17:10Yeah.
0:17:10 > 0:17:13Like CSI Elmsmere.
0:17:13 > 0:17:16We'd have to get prints off everybody in the school.
0:17:16 > 0:17:18I know that. I've seen it on TV.
0:17:18 > 0:17:21They cover people's fingers with ink and stuff.
0:17:21 > 0:17:25Hey, let's start with us.
0:17:25 > 0:17:27Whoa! Wha-What are you doing?!
0:17:27 > 0:17:29Paint will work just as well.
0:17:29 > 0:17:33Caught red-handed. The real culprit is revealed.
0:17:33 > 0:17:36- Whoa. Hang on. We were just... - Save it.
0:17:36 > 0:17:38I should've known it was you all along.
0:17:38 > 0:17:39My office. Now.
0:17:42 > 0:17:44HE GROANS
0:17:45 > 0:17:48Hey! You filled all the places!
0:17:48 > 0:17:49It was touch and go.
0:17:49 > 0:17:50Then this Carson kid signed up
0:17:50 > 0:17:53and suddenly a whole load of girls are beating down my door!
0:17:53 > 0:17:54I had to turn people away.
0:17:56 > 0:17:58Clem. Hey.
0:17:58 > 0:17:59Looking forward to this?
0:17:59 > 0:18:01Yep.
0:18:01 > 0:18:02Got to love a school trip.
0:18:02 > 0:18:05Erm...listen, you got a sec?
0:18:05 > 0:18:07There's, um,
0:18:07 > 0:18:09something I wanted to ask.
0:18:09 > 0:18:12Hi. I'm Carson. I've noticed you around.
0:18:13 > 0:18:15You are...?
0:18:15 > 0:18:17No-one. Don't mind us.
0:18:17 > 0:18:18You two get on with it.
0:18:18 > 0:18:20Yeah, and hurry up, will you?
0:18:20 > 0:18:23We've got a One Direction tribute act to throw ourselves at.
0:18:23 > 0:18:25- The Phantom Sprayer!- No!
0:18:25 > 0:18:27I was trying to prove Clem and the others were innocent
0:18:27 > 0:18:29so the theatre trip could go ahead.
0:18:29 > 0:18:32Since when were you interested in educational trips?
0:18:32 > 0:18:35- I'm calling your aunt and your mum. - This is such a botch fest.
0:18:35 > 0:18:37I didn't even do nothing wrong!
0:18:37 > 0:18:39Out.
0:18:44 > 0:18:45That wasn't there before.
0:18:47 > 0:18:49Guess that means I'm off the hook.
0:18:49 > 0:18:51Yes...
0:18:51 > 0:18:54You know, Auntie Liz ain't going to be happy
0:18:54 > 0:18:57when she hears that you kept me off an educational school trip.
0:18:57 > 0:19:00It's too late. The minibus will have already gone.
0:19:00 > 0:19:01You could get me a cab.
0:19:01 > 0:19:02I'll take you in my car.
0:19:15 > 0:19:18What One Direction songs are they going to do?
0:19:18 > 0:19:20On a scale of one to ten,
0:19:20 > 0:19:24how disappointed would you be if I said...none?
0:19:24 > 0:19:27Ten being disappointed enough to punch me in the head.
0:19:27 > 0:19:29You lied to us, didn't you?
0:19:29 > 0:19:30Would you have come if we hadn't?
0:19:31 > 0:19:35Can't wait to see your faces when the chainsaw clowns come out.
0:19:35 > 0:19:39It's just some stupid science show. Why would there be chainsaw clowns?
0:19:41 > 0:19:43It might still be good.
0:19:43 > 0:19:44OK, guys, it's time.
0:19:48 > 0:19:50HE WHIMPERS
0:20:02 > 0:20:05Oh, Harris, you goon!
0:20:05 > 0:20:07- It went everywhere!- Sorry.
0:20:07 > 0:20:09- Let me...- Oh!- Sorry.
0:20:11 > 0:20:12Not exactly sold out, is it?
0:20:12 > 0:20:14Carson?
0:20:14 > 0:20:17- And your name is?- Fleur.
0:20:17 > 0:20:19Popcorn?
0:20:19 > 0:20:20Not you.
0:20:24 > 0:20:27Well, it was cool to meet you, Fleur with the awesome name.
0:20:27 > 0:20:28Steady on.
0:20:28 > 0:20:29Give that back.
0:20:31 > 0:20:33Have you ever heard of EFAC?
0:20:35 > 0:20:37I'd love it if you came along.
0:20:37 > 0:20:39# That ball of slime!
0:20:39 > 0:20:41# It's all the same lines!
0:20:41 > 0:20:43# He must drop on every girl, every time!
0:20:43 > 0:20:46# And I'm such a sucker that I fell for it
0:20:46 > 0:20:49# Oh, yeah, he's got himself sorted
0:20:49 > 0:20:51# Slick tongue, charm and good looks
0:20:51 > 0:20:53# And boom, he's got another girl on the books
0:20:53 > 0:20:56# Of his stupid, creepoid, suck-up committee
0:20:56 > 0:20:59# I mean, this guy is not for real, is he?
0:20:59 > 0:21:01# I can't believe what a plum I've been
0:21:01 > 0:21:04# He was never one bit interested in me!
0:21:04 > 0:21:06# Flirted, pretended, acted like he liked me
0:21:06 > 0:21:09# It's Fleur now, who knows who the next might be?
0:21:09 > 0:21:11# For another recruit for that group he's got
0:21:11 > 0:21:13# Trying hard to be something he's not
0:21:13 > 0:21:16# I mean, yeah, sure I was pretending as well
0:21:16 > 0:21:19# To get him to fancy me, I wasn't myself
0:21:19 > 0:21:20# Erm... #
0:21:20 > 0:21:22But that was totally different!
0:21:22 > 0:21:24# That wasn't what this is!
0:21:24 > 0:21:27# This is treason, lowdown scheming
0:21:27 > 0:21:29# Pure evil for no good reason!
0:21:29 > 0:21:31# Some dumb boy trying to toy with girls
0:21:31 > 0:21:34# He ain't ready for me, I'm going to end his world!
0:21:34 > 0:21:37# OK, Carson, sure, you can play it slick
0:21:37 > 0:21:39# But just know that you won't get away with it!
0:21:39 > 0:21:41# You can lie, cheat, fight, repeat
0:21:41 > 0:21:44# Scam, con, make believe
0:21:44 > 0:21:46# You can do it to him and her, to all of them
0:21:46 > 0:21:51# But I'll tell you now, bruv, you can't cross Clem
0:21:51 > 0:21:53# You can't cross Clem
0:21:53 > 0:21:55# You can't cross Clem
0:21:55 > 0:21:58# You can't cross Clem
0:21:58 > 0:22:00# You can't cross Clem
0:22:00 > 0:22:04# Can't cross Clem. #
0:22:04 > 0:22:06DRAMATIC MUSIC BEGINS
0:22:12 > 0:22:14Good evening!
0:22:14 > 0:22:19I'm Professor Albert von Bangenstein Higgs Boson von Hubble III,
0:22:19 > 0:22:21but you can call me Alby.
0:22:21 > 0:22:22Good grief.
0:22:22 > 0:22:27Tonight we shall be going on an epic journey of scientific discovery
0:22:27 > 0:22:31lasting 13.8 billion years!
0:22:31 > 0:22:33You are so dead.
0:22:35 > 0:22:37Come on, it's started.
0:22:44 > 0:22:46# And the Big Bang went a-boom-biddy,
0:22:46 > 0:22:47# A-boom-biddy
0:22:47 > 0:22:49# A-boom-boom-boom
0:22:49 > 0:22:51# A-boom-boom-boom...! # Everybody! Come on!
0:22:51 > 0:22:53# A-boom-biddy, a-boom-biddy
0:22:53 > 0:22:54# A-boom-boom-boom-boom
0:22:54 > 0:22:56# And the universe contracts... #
0:22:56 > 0:22:58It's good, isn't it? Science with music!
0:22:58 > 0:22:59It's ridiculous.
0:22:59 > 0:23:02The Big Bang is just a name - it didn't actually make a sound.
0:23:02 > 0:23:04The physics of matter didn't even exist at that point.
0:23:04 > 0:23:06- Boo! Get off! - LAUGHTER
0:23:06 > 0:23:08Maybe we can go for a pizza afterwards...
0:23:08 > 0:23:09Sh, I'm trying to listen!
0:23:09 > 0:23:13Ha-ha-ha... Don't worry, Harris. Have a jelly snake.
0:23:13 > 0:23:16# Watch as the elliptical disc spins around our head
0:23:16 > 0:23:18# Around our head, around our head
0:23:18 > 0:23:20# The elliptical disc spins around our head
0:23:20 > 0:23:22# Around our head, around our head... #
0:23:22 > 0:23:23Oh, yeah!
0:23:23 > 0:23:27# A-boom-biddy, a-boom-biddy, a-boom-boom-boom, a-boom-boom-boom!
0:23:27 > 0:23:29# A-boom-boom-boom-boom! #
0:23:30 > 0:23:32Like any big show,
0:23:32 > 0:23:35the Big Bang had a star, in this case,
0:23:35 > 0:23:37Me! Not really.
0:23:37 > 0:23:38I'm not a star.
0:23:38 > 0:23:40No kidding, mate!
0:23:40 > 0:23:43The star of the show was gravity.
0:23:43 > 0:23:47Now, I'd like a volunteer from the audience. Anybody?
0:23:47 > 0:23:49Eli - diversion!
0:23:49 > 0:23:53Mouse! Mouse! Mouse in the house!
0:23:53 > 0:23:55SCREAMING AND SHRIEKING
0:23:56 > 0:23:59Nobody tread on it!
0:23:59 > 0:24:01Right, everybody, just calm down.
0:24:01 > 0:24:02Oh!
0:24:02 > 0:24:06Sorry, my mistake.
0:24:06 > 0:24:09It wasn't a mouse. It was Owen.
0:24:11 > 0:24:13Ah, I think we have our volunteer!
0:24:13 > 0:24:17- Er, no, no, no...! - Come up on stage. Don't be shy.
0:24:23 > 0:24:25- And the finishing touch. - I'll look stupid.
0:24:25 > 0:24:28You're my assistant, not a fashion model.
0:24:28 > 0:24:32From now on, I shall call you...Igor.
0:24:33 > 0:24:35Now, ladies and gentlemen...
0:24:38 > 0:24:41..I give you the star of the show,
0:24:41 > 0:24:43gravity!
0:24:47 > 0:24:49LAUGHTER
0:24:52 > 0:24:55CHEERING
0:24:55 > 0:24:57That's more like it!
0:24:57 > 0:24:58How is this science?!
0:24:58 > 0:25:01CHEERING AND WHOOPING CONTINUE
0:25:02 > 0:25:04At least you got gunged.
0:25:04 > 0:25:06I've always wanted to be gunged.
0:25:06 > 0:25:10I liked it best when you slipped over and pretended to hurt yourself.
0:25:12 > 0:25:13I did hurt myself.
0:25:13 > 0:25:15Good. Saves me the job.
0:25:15 > 0:25:18Igor. Just wanted to say thanks for your help. You were brilliant.
0:25:18 > 0:25:20Yeah. A brilliant embarrassment.
0:25:20 > 0:25:23Jim, mate, how'd your show go?
0:25:23 > 0:25:25Yeah, good. I had a bit of help, though.
0:25:25 > 0:25:28Whoa, wait, you know CJ Dean?
0:25:28 > 0:25:29We go back.
0:25:29 > 0:25:32Seriously, man, you're the only reason I'm here!
0:25:32 > 0:25:34I was going to skip his show to come and see you.
0:25:34 > 0:25:35Sorry you missed me.
0:25:35 > 0:25:40- I'll put you on my guest list next time I'm in town, yeah?- For real?
0:25:40 > 0:25:43I'm a dancer too. I've got, like, millions of questions.
0:25:43 > 0:25:45Fire away.
0:25:45 > 0:25:46Result!
0:25:46 > 0:25:47- I want a word.- What?
0:25:47 > 0:25:50What you're teaching is completely inaccurate.
0:25:50 > 0:25:51It's just a bit of fun.
0:25:51 > 0:25:52Huh!
0:25:52 > 0:25:54Try telling that to Robert Grosseteste!
0:25:54 > 0:25:56Who?
0:25:56 > 0:25:58Or Vesto Slipher.
0:25:58 > 0:25:59Who, sorry?
0:25:59 > 0:26:02- You don't know who Vesto Slipher is?!- No.
0:26:02 > 0:26:04Right.
0:26:07 > 0:26:08Fancy a pizza?
0:26:08 > 0:26:09I thought you'd never ask.
0:26:12 > 0:26:15So, girls, I'll see you at EFAC tomorrow, then?
0:26:16 > 0:26:19Er, no. You lot are well weird.
0:26:20 > 0:26:22How about that, Carson?
0:26:22 > 0:26:24Your flirting doesn't work on everyone.
0:26:24 > 0:26:26Flirting?
0:26:26 > 0:26:28- I don't know what you... - Oh, give over.
0:26:28 > 0:26:31You trick girls into thinking you fancy them
0:26:31 > 0:26:33so they can sign up to EFAC!
0:26:33 > 0:26:35Look...
0:26:35 > 0:26:36I'm friendly, OK?
0:26:36 > 0:26:38Maybe a little bit too friendly,
0:26:38 > 0:26:40for someone as good-looking as me. GROANING
0:26:40 > 0:26:43But all I'm trying to do is help the school.
0:26:43 > 0:26:45Modest, much?
0:26:45 > 0:26:46You used us?
0:26:46 > 0:26:48For the greater good.
0:26:50 > 0:26:53OK, girls, here's an idea.
0:26:53 > 0:26:57How about we all go grab a burger and we can just talk about this?
0:26:58 > 0:27:00I've got a better idea.
0:27:00 > 0:27:02Oi!
0:27:02 > 0:27:04Alby!
0:27:04 > 0:27:07What was that well important thing you were on about?
0:27:07 > 0:27:09Oh, yeah...
0:27:09 > 0:27:10gravity!
0:27:10 > 0:27:13GASPING
0:27:15 > 0:27:17WHOOPING
0:27:17 > 0:27:19Detention!
0:27:19 > 0:27:20Totally worth it.
0:27:24 > 0:27:26# Can't live with 'em
0:27:26 > 0:27:27# And you can't kick 'em out
0:27:27 > 0:27:28# When they're up they rub it in your face
0:27:28 > 0:27:29# Kick you when you're down
0:27:29 > 0:27:31# But when no-one understands them
0:27:31 > 0:27:32# You know what they're on about
0:27:32 > 0:27:33# Always gonna be around
0:27:33 > 0:27:34# Gotta find a common ground
0:27:34 > 0:27:38# If you know so much about me
0:27:38 > 0:27:39# Where do I go from here?
0:27:39 > 0:27:41# If you see 'em every day
0:27:41 > 0:27:42# You can never get away
0:27:42 > 0:27:45# Only time that you're the boss? 4 o'clock. #