Alien

Download Subtitles

Transcript

0:00:43 > 0:00:45This is like torture!

0:00:45 > 0:00:47Shush!

0:00:49 > 0:00:53- It's like having your fingernails ripped out!- With rusty pliers.

0:00:53 > 0:00:58It's only maths, and if you don't do it you've got a...98 per cent chance

0:00:58 > 0:01:00of being grounded.

0:01:00 > 0:01:03But we're kids. We should be out playing, not worrying about

0:01:03 > 0:01:06how long it'll take Farmer Jones to get to the market.

0:01:06 > 0:01:0822 minutes.

0:01:08 > 0:01:11I don't care! I hope his vegetables go rotten, and he can't sell them.

0:01:11 > 0:01:14Of course, in the future,

0:01:14 > 0:01:16kids won't have to study.

0:01:16 > 0:01:18- They won't?- No.

0:01:18 > 0:01:21They'll just be hooked up to a supercomputer, press a few buttons,

0:01:21 > 0:01:23and whoosh - you're a maths genius.

0:01:23 > 0:01:25Outstanding!

0:01:25 > 0:01:29Of course, that's not for another 50 or 60 years.

0:01:29 > 0:01:32Except aliens. They could probably do that now.

0:01:32 > 0:01:37Yeah. It's quite possible that in some far-away galaxy...

0:01:37 > 0:01:40We should contact them, get them to turn us into maths geniuses.

0:01:40 > 0:01:43Contact them how? NASA have been trying for 50 years,

0:01:43 > 0:01:45and you know what they've got?

0:01:45 > 0:01:47- Nothing.- They're probably doing it all wrong.

0:01:47 > 0:01:49And we're going to solve that, are we?

0:01:49 > 0:01:52Three children with no equipment - Agghh!

0:01:52 > 0:01:55- You're being negative. It's bad for morale.- You're absolutely right.

0:01:55 > 0:01:58- I want to help in any way I can. - Great.

0:01:58 > 0:02:01Then all we need to do is build an alien contactor machine.

0:02:08 > 0:02:10I really can't see this working.

0:02:10 > 0:02:12The nearest star's four light-years away.

0:02:12 > 0:02:15Hey, enough with the science lecture. Just get it operational.

0:02:15 > 0:02:17I'm trying. The circuitry is crude,

0:02:17 > 0:02:20but still, it should amplify the signal.

0:02:20 > 0:02:22OK. Connect the satellite dish.

0:02:25 > 0:02:27# Some boys take a beautiful girl... #

0:02:27 > 0:02:29FIZZING, THEN TV GOES DEAD

0:02:30 > 0:02:32Dad, we need a new TV.

0:02:33 > 0:02:35And if you took off in the Space Shuttle,

0:02:35 > 0:02:37guess how long it'd take to get to the nearest star.

0:02:37 > 0:02:40- A couple of weeks?- 18,000 years.

0:02:40 > 0:02:43- Boring.- What are you doing?

0:02:43 > 0:02:45Those are my dad's onions.

0:02:49 > 0:02:51That's disgusting!

0:02:51 > 0:02:53I'm practising living off the land,

0:02:53 > 0:02:56so this week I'm going to eat everything that I capture.

0:02:56 > 0:02:58Or as we'd say, steal.

0:02:58 > 0:03:01Do you even care about basic food safety?

0:03:01 > 0:03:03What doesn't kill me makes me stronger.

0:03:03 > 0:03:07Are you sure? I think botulism might make you quite a bit weaker.

0:03:07 > 0:03:09Hurry up.

0:03:11 > 0:03:13Here we go. Tune it.

0:03:13 > 0:03:15DISTORTED VOICES

0:03:16 > 0:03:20Contact! Hello, this is Charlie at Brookville B&B. Come in.

0:03:20 > 0:03:22We urgently need your help.

0:03:24 > 0:03:27Children are suffering horribly. You must come immediately.

0:03:30 > 0:03:32SIREN

0:03:34 > 0:03:36Agghh!

0:03:36 > 0:03:38Tricky. Ah, yeah, yeah...

0:03:38 > 0:03:41Looks like a blown microchip.

0:03:42 > 0:03:44Right, OK.

0:03:44 > 0:03:46Anything?

0:03:47 > 0:03:49Oh, do we have to do this every time?

0:03:49 > 0:03:53- You've never once fixed anything. - No, no, but I have learned a lot.

0:03:53 > 0:03:55Really? Cos it seems like you always just open it up,

0:03:55 > 0:03:58and then say it's a blown microchip.

0:03:59 > 0:04:01And then you can't put it back together again.

0:04:02 > 0:04:05Relax! I could put this together with my eyes closed.

0:04:05 > 0:04:08You pop the thingummy bob on the whaddyamaflap...

0:04:08 > 0:04:12That clicks...clicks...that click, click... That is weird.

0:04:12 > 0:04:14Anyway, listen to this.

0:04:14 > 0:04:16Vienna, city break.

0:04:16 > 0:04:19Four nights, five-star hotel, 600 quid all in.

0:04:19 > 0:04:22- That's a great deal.- Got to be paid for by Saturday.

0:04:22 > 0:04:24Let's put it on the good credit card.

0:04:24 > 0:04:26- Yeah...- What?

0:04:26 > 0:04:29The good credit card's kind of...baaaaad.

0:04:29 > 0:04:31Maxed out?

0:04:31 > 0:04:34- On what?!- On food.

0:04:34 > 0:04:36Shelter. The cost of getting the satellite blokes to fix the...

0:04:36 > 0:04:38What IS that thing called?

0:04:40 > 0:04:42- Where did you get that?- Dad.

0:04:42 > 0:04:44Little treat for him.

0:04:44 > 0:04:46I love my tart. It's so beautiful.

0:04:46 > 0:04:48It's no wonder the card's maxed out.

0:04:50 > 0:04:52What'll you do with it, Louie?

0:04:53 > 0:04:56- Are you going to eat it?- If I eat it, it'll be gone.

0:04:56 > 0:04:58And I don't want it to be gone.

0:04:58 > 0:05:00BELL

0:05:00 > 0:05:02I need a break.

0:05:05 > 0:05:07Charlie, it's for you.

0:05:07 > 0:05:09It was an accident. I was just playing.

0:05:09 > 0:05:11Children are supposed to play, aren't they?

0:05:11 > 0:05:13Not on our radio frequencies.

0:05:13 > 0:05:17- That can land you in serious trouble.- I'm so sorry, Officer.

0:05:17 > 0:05:19We have tried to teach him.

0:05:20 > 0:05:22I've often thought a night in the cells might do him some good!

0:05:23 > 0:05:25But that's probably illegal.

0:05:26 > 0:05:28Is it...?

0:05:32 > 0:05:34And that's why the squad car was here.

0:05:34 > 0:05:37Charlie had been transmitting an SOS signal...

0:05:37 > 0:05:39on a Police channel.

0:05:39 > 0:05:43- Boys will be boys!- They will indeed, yes.

0:05:43 > 0:05:47You try your best to be a good parent, but, uh...

0:05:47 > 0:05:49Yes. Maybe I could see the room?

0:05:49 > 0:05:51MOBILE PHONE RINGS

0:05:51 > 0:05:53Oh, yes, I'll get your key.

0:05:53 > 0:05:55Hi. Yeah, just got here.

0:05:55 > 0:05:57No, I'm meeting him later.

0:05:57 > 0:06:00Yes. Some of their guys are struggling with the maths.

0:06:00 > 0:06:03No, I'll download it. They'll be up to speed by the morning.

0:06:04 > 0:06:06OK, bye.

0:06:06 > 0:06:10Ah. You must be Charlie.

0:06:10 > 0:06:12Who was calling for help on the radio.

0:06:12 > 0:06:16- When did you get here?- Just now. - This is amazing.

0:06:16 > 0:06:19You're just like us. Some kind of suit, is it?

0:06:20 > 0:06:22- What?- Just act normal.

0:06:22 > 0:06:24- This is a new guest.- Yes, I know.

0:06:24 > 0:06:28This is Mr Atkinson. He's here for a business convention.

0:06:28 > 0:06:30- His company makes...- Oh, air compressors.

0:06:30 > 0:06:34Oh, right. Nice one.

0:06:36 > 0:06:39Come on, make yourself useful. Show Mr Atkinson to the Mulberry.

0:06:39 > 0:06:41- That's our best suite.- Oh, thank you.

0:06:47 > 0:06:49That's the bed. It's for sleeping on.

0:06:49 > 0:06:51OK.

0:06:51 > 0:06:54And that's the telly. You see people on it, but they're not real.

0:06:54 > 0:06:56You don't say?

0:06:56 > 0:06:58Come here.

0:06:59 > 0:07:03And that's the bath. It's handy for washing and that.

0:07:03 > 0:07:08- Do you wash?- No, I just usually rub myself down with lots of sand.

0:07:08 > 0:07:10Really?! That's amazing!

0:07:11 > 0:07:13This is the toilet.

0:07:13 > 0:07:15For number two you sit, and that paper -

0:07:15 > 0:07:17OK! Thank you very much.

0:07:17 > 0:07:19I think you should probably go now, but thank you.

0:07:19 > 0:07:22Is that the supercomputer? Are you going to hook me up?

0:07:22 > 0:07:24No. I'm just going to get settled in,

0:07:24 > 0:07:26and then I'm going to go for a stroll, OK?

0:07:27 > 0:07:29- So, later then?- Later.

0:07:36 > 0:07:38This is good, isn't it?

0:07:38 > 0:07:40Oh, the TV's fixed.

0:07:41 > 0:07:43Hey, we're watching that!

0:07:43 > 0:07:46Louie, that's a fruit tart. It can't watch TV.

0:07:46 > 0:07:50- It can!- No, it can't. It hasn't got eyes.

0:07:50 > 0:07:52You're horrible. We don't like you.

0:07:59 > 0:08:01That's exactly what I'm saying.

0:08:01 > 0:08:03It's here. The alien's here!

0:08:03 > 0:08:06That's impossible. There's no way on our first attempt -

0:08:06 > 0:08:09I'm telling you. It's got a secret computer,

0:08:09 > 0:08:11and it knew all about us calling.

0:08:11 > 0:08:13AND it washes in sand.

0:08:13 > 0:08:15Astounding.

0:08:15 > 0:08:17Where did you get all that?

0:08:18 > 0:08:20They left a window open at the retirement home.

0:08:20 > 0:08:22Some old people are actually quite good at fighting.

0:08:24 > 0:08:27Even if an alien did hear us, why would it come?

0:08:27 > 0:08:29To help us.

0:08:29 > 0:08:32You seriously think advanced beings would travel vast distances

0:08:32 > 0:08:34to help YOU dodge maths?

0:08:34 > 0:08:37Not me. All kids. We'll be heroes.

0:08:39 > 0:08:41Not if they've come to take over the world.

0:08:42 > 0:08:44And I'm the one who brought it here.

0:08:44 > 0:08:47Humans'll hate me.

0:08:47 > 0:08:50The thing is, the alien's really grumpy, so we'd better be nice to it.

0:08:58 > 0:09:00Nice milky brew.

0:09:00 > 0:09:02I don't know why you fixed the TV. Should've just got a new one.

0:09:02 > 0:09:04Oh, he didn't fix it. He broke it some more,

0:09:04 > 0:09:06and the satellite man fixed it at great expense.

0:09:06 > 0:09:08- OK.- Not that you're bothered about money.

0:09:08 > 0:09:12Your lovely new jacket you love so much I've just found on the floor.

0:09:12 > 0:09:16I didn't drop it! I can't believe you just assume it was me.

0:09:17 > 0:09:19Hello.

0:09:19 > 0:09:21I've been for a stroll.

0:09:21 > 0:09:24- Nice little spot, this.- Yeah, we're very fond of it.

0:09:24 > 0:09:26I think my colleagues would like it too.

0:09:26 > 0:09:29There's another three coming down for the convention, and I was wondering,

0:09:29 > 0:09:32do you think you might be able to squeeze them in?

0:09:32 > 0:09:34For four nights from tomorrow.

0:09:35 > 0:09:39- Um...- Oh, yeah, yeah, we'd love to help, of course.

0:09:39 > 0:09:42- Excellent.- And how about you? Do you need anything?

0:09:42 > 0:09:45I'm fine, thank you. Just going to have a little read of the paper.

0:09:45 > 0:09:49Perfect, yeah. Having a relax, but still keeping an eye on things.

0:09:55 > 0:09:57I'll just...

0:09:59 > 0:10:01Three for four nights. That's... That's... That's...

0:10:01 > 0:10:03That's enough to go to Vienna!

0:10:03 > 0:10:05We're going to Vienna! Yes!

0:10:05 > 0:10:08- Me and your dad are.- What?!

0:10:08 > 0:10:10You can't just go off on holiday and leave us.

0:10:10 > 0:10:12That's like mental cruelty.

0:10:12 > 0:10:15- We'll get your Auntie Bea to stay. - No way!

0:10:15 > 0:10:19She's super-strict, and she forces me to eat vegetables.

0:10:19 > 0:10:22What do you think? We're like cats, you can just run off and leave us?

0:10:22 > 0:10:26Hannah, it's a long weekend, and we need it.

0:10:29 > 0:10:31She'll get over it.

0:10:31 > 0:10:33BANGING

0:10:33 > 0:10:35Eventually.

0:10:35 > 0:10:37We're going to Vienna!

0:10:37 > 0:10:39BOTH CHANT: We're going to Vienna!

0:10:46 > 0:10:48It washes in sand, so we'll take it some.

0:10:48 > 0:10:51- Make it feel at home.- Good idea.

0:10:51 > 0:10:54If we can keep it happy, it mightn't kill us.

0:10:54 > 0:10:57They probably want a few humans for their zoo.

0:10:57 > 0:10:59It's not here to destroy the human race.

0:10:59 > 0:11:02Still, no harm keeping in its good books.

0:11:02 > 0:11:04Faster! Go faster.

0:11:04 > 0:11:07- What's taking so long?- These kids!

0:11:07 > 0:11:10They've had no training. They're weak.

0:11:10 > 0:11:12Excuse me. I want to go now.

0:11:12 > 0:11:14Fall in. Back in the line.

0:11:15 > 0:11:17Useless. Would have been faster doing it ourselves.

0:11:18 > 0:11:20I did actually say that.

0:11:20 > 0:11:22Hey!

0:11:22 > 0:11:25- Parents! Better pull out!- Just doing activities with them!

0:11:25 > 0:11:27Like you should be!

0:11:31 > 0:11:34That's the lot. He's going to be dead chuffed when he wakes up.

0:11:38 > 0:11:40He looks just like an ordinary bloke.

0:11:40 > 0:11:42Of course he does. He's wearing a human suit.

0:11:44 > 0:11:46- He's waking.- Have a nice rest, did you?

0:11:46 > 0:11:48GASPS

0:11:49 > 0:11:51- What is it?- Don't worry. You're on Earth, remember?

0:11:51 > 0:11:53I'm Ben, sir.

0:11:53 > 0:11:57I built the communicator. I just want you to know you can rely on me.

0:11:57 > 0:12:00- What are you doing in my room?- Just making it comfy.

0:12:00 > 0:12:02- We put some nice sand in the bath. - OK, out!

0:12:03 > 0:12:06But we need to do the supercomputer link-up soon.

0:12:06 > 0:12:09- We've got a maths test.- Look, will you please get out of my room?

0:12:11 > 0:12:13Bye-bye. Thank you.

0:12:20 > 0:12:23I'll tell you why it won't help us - cos Ben's right.

0:12:23 > 0:12:25It must be here to take over the Earth.

0:12:25 > 0:12:27I knew it! And now we've made it angry.

0:12:27 > 0:12:29OK, so it's down to us.

0:12:29 > 0:12:32- Ben brought it here.- Don't say that. It wasn't my idea.

0:12:32 > 0:12:35So we need to stop it. I say we fight.

0:12:43 > 0:12:45Are you out of your mind?!

0:12:45 > 0:12:47That thing we thought was a super-computer

0:12:47 > 0:12:50is probably some kind of deadly ray gun.

0:12:50 > 0:12:52I'll have to tell Mum and Dad.

0:12:52 > 0:12:54I can't leave them living with a dangerous alien.

0:12:56 > 0:12:58- It's true - he's an alien!- Quiet.

0:12:58 > 0:13:01Mr Atkinson is a very important guest.

0:13:01 > 0:13:04It's true. He's going to give Mum enough money to abandon us.

0:13:04 > 0:13:07And he's not happy about you going in his room.

0:13:07 > 0:13:09- But he is -- Shush!

0:13:10 > 0:13:13- Can I just ask one question? One tiny...- What?

0:13:13 > 0:13:17If he's not an alien, how come he asked me to put sand in his bath?

0:13:18 > 0:13:20What?!

0:13:20 > 0:13:22You're such a freak.

0:13:24 > 0:13:26- I'm so sorry about this.- That's OK.

0:13:26 > 0:13:28It's very nice of you to be so understanding.

0:13:28 > 0:13:31Is there anything I can get you? A cup of tea?

0:13:31 > 0:13:33- A bun?- I'm fine, thanks.

0:13:33 > 0:13:35If you think of anything, anything at all, don't hesitate.

0:13:37 > 0:13:39What are you doing here?

0:13:39 > 0:13:41Why are you being so nice to him? You're never nice to humans.

0:13:41 > 0:13:44I told you - Mr Atkinson is a very important guest.

0:13:44 > 0:13:48And why do you keep saying that? Why is he important? Why?

0:13:52 > 0:13:55- What?- Nothing. I'm just going to go to my room.

0:13:55 > 0:13:57Good idea.

0:14:03 > 0:14:06Unbelievable, isn't it? Swanning off to Vienna, leaving her kids.

0:14:07 > 0:14:11I know it must be illegal for people to leave their kids with a horrible aunt.

0:14:12 > 0:14:13What?

0:14:13 > 0:14:16Worse than I thought. The alien's brainwashed Mum!

0:14:16 > 0:14:18I've got to go.

0:14:18 > 0:14:21Whatever's wrong with you, I think it's quite serious.

0:14:21 > 0:14:23I'm telling you - she's been running round like its slave.

0:14:23 > 0:14:27Oh, I'm so sorry. Let me do this, let me do that.

0:14:27 > 0:14:29Hello! She's only being nice to him

0:14:29 > 0:14:32- because she wants to go on a holid...ay...- What?!

0:14:32 > 0:14:37I've just remembered - I did notice something odd earlier.

0:14:37 > 0:14:39I heard her calling him master.

0:14:39 > 0:14:42See?! Why would she say that if she hadn't been brainwashed?

0:14:42 > 0:14:46So he really is an alien! Oh, Charlie, what are we going to do?

0:14:46 > 0:14:48We need some proof, so I was thinking -

0:14:48 > 0:14:50what if I got his disguise off?

0:14:50 > 0:14:52That's a really good idea.

0:15:06 > 0:15:08HE SNORES

0:15:13 > 0:15:15Agghhh!

0:15:15 > 0:15:17Agghhhh!

0:15:17 > 0:15:19- What do you think you're doing?! - Nothing.

0:15:19 > 0:15:21I just wanted to see what you looked like underneath.

0:15:21 > 0:15:25- What's happening? Charlie!- He just attacked me!

0:15:25 > 0:15:28I didn't attack it. I was just trying to get its disguise off.

0:15:32 > 0:15:34Awfully sorry.

0:15:34 > 0:15:36Would you like a newspaper in the morning?

0:15:37 > 0:15:39- No.- OK.

0:15:43 > 0:15:45This is a dream.

0:15:48 > 0:15:49GROANS

0:15:50 > 0:15:52I just don't understand it.

0:15:52 > 0:15:55I tell you that Mr Atkinson is an important guest, and what do you do?

0:15:55 > 0:15:57You attack him.

0:15:57 > 0:15:59You're right, Mum. I'm sorry.

0:16:00 > 0:16:02Don't listen. She's been got at.

0:16:03 > 0:16:06If I have to listen to any more of this... I don't... I don't...

0:16:06 > 0:16:09You go up, love. Me and Charlie will straighten this out.

0:16:09 > 0:16:11Well, I hope so, because if not,

0:16:11 > 0:16:13we're going to have to do something drastic.

0:16:13 > 0:16:15Chain him to the bed.

0:16:15 > 0:16:17OK, Dad, we don't have long.

0:16:17 > 0:16:19- It's Mum. She's been brainwashed. - Charlie...

0:16:19 > 0:16:20VOICE ECHOES

0:16:20 > 0:16:22You have to understand

0:16:22 > 0:16:25that Mr Atkinson is a very, very important guest.

0:16:26 > 0:16:30- Oh.- And if he likes it here, he's going to bring his friends.

0:16:30 > 0:16:32- OK?- Yeah...

0:16:32 > 0:16:34Thanks for explaining, Dad.

0:16:34 > 0:16:36- I understand now.- Excellent.

0:16:39 > 0:16:41Don't leave me hanging.

0:16:41 > 0:16:43There we go.

0:16:48 > 0:16:50Good chat with Charlie.

0:16:50 > 0:16:53- I think I really got through to him. - Well, I hope so.

0:16:53 > 0:16:55Cos Mr Atkinson was really fed up.

0:16:55 > 0:16:58Yeah. No, I think I've got a bit of a knack for it, you know?

0:16:58 > 0:17:01It's all about talking to the kid as if he's a normal person.

0:17:01 > 0:17:03I mean, what if he decides to leave in the morning?

0:17:03 > 0:17:07- That's the end of Vienna.- Listening. Listening is important.

0:17:07 > 0:17:09Right. So what did I just say?

0:17:12 > 0:17:14Something about jam.

0:17:15 > 0:17:19Mr Atkinson! We're going to have to go all-out in the morning.

0:17:19 > 0:17:22Yes, yes, yes. Obviously, I've got that yoga class first thing.

0:17:22 > 0:17:26Which I'm not going to go to. So, yes.

0:17:26 > 0:17:28Yes.

0:17:46 > 0:17:48Come to me, my precious...

0:17:49 > 0:17:51Mmm.

0:17:51 > 0:17:53SCREAMING

0:17:57 > 0:17:59No!

0:18:04 > 0:18:06It's all right. You're safe now.

0:18:07 > 0:18:09It was just a bad dream.

0:18:22 > 0:18:24Sleep well?

0:18:26 > 0:18:31Look, I just wanted to say how sorry we are about last night.

0:18:31 > 0:18:33Yes, not the sort of thing you expect.

0:18:33 > 0:18:36I'm here on business. I need my sleep.

0:18:36 > 0:18:38Absolutely, absolutely.

0:18:38 > 0:18:42I've had a long chat with Charlie, and he feels just awful about it.

0:18:43 > 0:18:45Here we are.

0:18:45 > 0:18:47The muffins and the bread, all organic.

0:18:47 > 0:18:50From a bakery in Bridlington.

0:18:50 > 0:18:53- I was up at the crack of dawn getting them.- Not that we mind, no.

0:18:53 > 0:18:57- It's a pleasure.- And all locally sourced here too.

0:18:58 > 0:19:01The sausages even come with a little bio of the pig.

0:19:01 > 0:19:03He was called Horace.

0:19:05 > 0:19:07Mm. Oh, delicious!

0:19:08 > 0:19:10Horace must have been a well-adjusted pig.

0:19:10 > 0:19:12BOTH LAUGH HYSTERICALLY

0:19:13 > 0:19:17- That is a zinger.- We are so sorry about last night.

0:19:17 > 0:19:20- I've done that bit.- Yeah, well, I'm doing it now, all right?

0:19:20 > 0:19:23- We're very, very sorry.- It's fine. These things happen.

0:19:23 > 0:19:27Oh, thank you so much. You're so, so kind.

0:19:27 > 0:19:29You are a kind man.

0:19:29 > 0:19:31To be honest, I was going to leave this morning.

0:19:31 > 0:19:34I was going to find somewhere else for my colleagues to stay.

0:19:35 > 0:19:40But, well, it is a nice spot, and this breakfast is exceptional.

0:19:40 > 0:19:42Oh!

0:19:43 > 0:19:45Thank you so much.

0:19:45 > 0:19:47You won't regret it.

0:19:47 > 0:19:49It's fine, really.

0:19:49 > 0:19:51Oh, I'm sorry!

0:19:51 > 0:19:54- Sorry.- Enjoy!

0:19:54 > 0:19:56Sorry about everything.

0:20:07 > 0:20:09Need anything else?

0:20:09 > 0:20:11No.

0:20:11 > 0:20:13Good.

0:20:18 > 0:20:20BOTH HUM BLUE DANUBE

0:20:23 > 0:20:26- What's up with you?- Mr Atkinson has decided to stay.

0:20:26 > 0:20:29- Vienna's back on!- So that's why you're celebrating?

0:20:29 > 0:20:31Because you're running away from your children,

0:20:31 > 0:20:34and leaving them with someone who's mentally unstable?

0:20:34 > 0:20:38- Yes!- No, no, no. Your Auntie Bea's not mentally unstable.

0:20:38 > 0:20:41She makes me go to bed at nine. Call that normal, do you?

0:20:43 > 0:20:46- All right?- Oh, I forgot about this. Pear and ginger chutney.

0:20:46 > 0:20:49- Bet Mr Atkinson'd like some.- Good idea.

0:20:49 > 0:20:52I've got my homemade marmalade here. Let's give him a choice.

0:20:54 > 0:20:57You see that? Dad's been brainwashed too.

0:20:58 > 0:21:00They're like slaves.

0:21:00 > 0:21:02It's good to keep the Master happy.

0:21:02 > 0:21:04Hannah?

0:21:04 > 0:21:06Charlie, it's taken over my mind! I can't get rid of it!

0:21:06 > 0:21:08Don't worry, Hannah, I'll save you.

0:21:08 > 0:21:10Save me...?

0:21:10 > 0:21:12No, I'm happy with the Master.

0:21:12 > 0:21:15Very, very happy.

0:21:22 > 0:21:24So, let me get this straight.

0:21:24 > 0:21:26This helmet's to save us from the alien's mind control?

0:21:26 > 0:21:30Yeah, and it must be working, cos look - I'm still normal.

0:21:30 > 0:21:32That's one point of view.

0:21:32 > 0:21:35So, we've all got to wear them.

0:21:37 > 0:21:41This is ridiculous. Even if the alien is doing mind control

0:21:41 > 0:21:43why would you think a tin foil hat -

0:21:43 > 0:21:45If you don't put it on, we can't trust you.

0:21:45 > 0:21:48That's right. You could be taken over any second.

0:21:48 > 0:21:50You could be taken over already.

0:21:50 > 0:21:52Maybe that's why he doesn't want to put it on.

0:21:53 > 0:21:57Maybe he doesn't want to be separated from his alien master.

0:21:57 > 0:22:01OK, OK! See? I'm part of Team Earthling.

0:22:01 > 0:22:03- So everyone's clear on the plan? - Roger that.

0:22:09 > 0:22:13There's three of them. Must be part of a special forces recon.

0:22:13 > 0:22:17If you need any more cakes or tea, just let me know, won't you?

0:22:17 > 0:22:21Being their servant... If that's just making them tea and stuff,

0:22:21 > 0:22:23that's not so bad, is it?

0:22:24 > 0:22:26Death before surrender, got it?

0:22:26 > 0:22:28I understand.

0:22:28 > 0:22:31- OK, phase one.- To neutralise the human puppets.

0:22:36 > 0:22:38KNOCKING AT DOOR

0:22:38 > 0:22:40What?

0:22:46 > 0:22:48My jacket...

0:22:48 > 0:22:50You better not have...

0:23:03 > 0:23:05SCREAMING

0:23:08 > 0:23:10Everything OK? We heard a scream.

0:23:10 > 0:23:12I think it was a seagull. Cupcake?

0:23:18 > 0:23:20What's going on?

0:23:21 > 0:23:24- Charlie!- Oh, no, no. We don't know...

0:23:25 > 0:23:27KEY TURNS IN LOCK

0:23:27 > 0:23:29Charlie?

0:23:29 > 0:23:30Charlie!

0:23:30 > 0:23:32If your eyes still work, read this.

0:23:35 > 0:23:38"You have been taken over by aliens.

0:23:38 > 0:23:42I will save you, but please put on the tin foil hats."

0:23:45 > 0:23:47They must be the tin foil hats.

0:23:48 > 0:23:50Not that that's relevant.

0:23:51 > 0:23:54Charlie, open this door now.

0:23:54 > 0:23:56I can't. Not until you're all wearing the hats.

0:23:56 > 0:24:00- I'm so going to get you for this. - How are we getting on?

0:24:00 > 0:24:03- What are you doing?!- You want to get out of here, don't you?

0:24:03 > 0:24:06- You too, Mum, and Hannah.- You're such a freak.

0:24:09 > 0:24:11This is not a good moment.

0:24:13 > 0:24:17Charlie, I'm being deadly serious now.

0:24:17 > 0:24:19- Open this door!- In a minute.

0:24:19 > 0:24:21I'm just going to go and get rid of the aliens.

0:24:21 > 0:24:25Charlie, no. We will stop your pocket money forever...FOREVER.

0:24:25 > 0:24:29It's OK, Mum, you're not real. You're just an alien puppet.

0:24:29 > 0:24:31Now, I'm going to set the fire alarm off,

0:24:31 > 0:24:35- but don't worry - there's no fire. - Charlie, don't you dare!

0:24:35 > 0:24:37I'll come back and let you out once I've got rid of them.

0:24:39 > 0:24:41I'm so sorry, Mrs Enright.

0:24:41 > 0:24:43I'm sure we'll laugh about this over a cup of tea.

0:24:43 > 0:24:45Ben, Ben, open the door, Ben.

0:24:45 > 0:24:50- Time for phase two.- Get the aliens out of the house.

0:24:51 > 0:24:53- Charlie!- Charlie?

0:24:53 > 0:24:55ALARM RINGS

0:24:55 > 0:24:57Masters, please, we have to go!

0:24:58 > 0:25:00Chop chop! It's a fire!

0:25:00 > 0:25:02Hurry up!

0:25:03 > 0:25:05Quick!

0:25:06 > 0:25:08Wait here. I'll save your weapons.

0:25:08 > 0:25:10No, I don't think you should go back in.

0:25:17 > 0:25:19Don't worry, I'll save you.

0:25:38 > 0:25:40No!

0:25:41 > 0:25:43No!

0:25:43 > 0:25:46Definitely looks like this is their main weapon.

0:25:49 > 0:25:51Oi? Aliens?

0:25:51 > 0:25:54Thought you'd zap the human race with this, did you?

0:25:54 > 0:25:56No, the prototype...

0:25:58 > 0:26:00Stop it! Stop that!

0:26:00 > 0:26:04No, because guess what? You can't control me!

0:26:04 > 0:26:07Please! Stop, please!

0:26:07 > 0:26:10Go back to your own planet, and leave us alone.

0:26:11 > 0:26:13We did it. We saved humanity.

0:26:15 > 0:26:17ALL CHEER

0:26:21 > 0:26:23Oh, no.

0:26:24 > 0:26:26What?

0:26:32 > 0:26:34READS LABEL

0:26:36 > 0:26:38Leeds.

0:26:40 > 0:26:43But how could aliens go to Leeds and get...

0:26:46 > 0:26:48Oh...

0:26:48 > 0:26:50- Charlie!- Open the door!

0:26:51 > 0:26:53SIREN

0:26:55 > 0:26:57Run!

0:26:58 > 0:27:00It's gone a little bit wrong!

0:27:07 > 0:27:10How can this be right? Doing all the shopping for a month, and for what?

0:27:10 > 0:27:13For proving I'm loyal to humanity.

0:27:13 > 0:27:17What kind of lesson's that for a child? It's a travesty of justice.

0:27:19 > 0:27:21Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd