Crazy Keith - Extreme Koala

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0:00:21 > 0:00:25I've overslept. I'm going to be so late, I've got to run.

0:00:25 > 0:00:27Morning, Nev, Keith.

0:00:27 > 0:00:28Barney!

0:00:30 > 0:00:35I'm fine, Nev. Keith, be careful where you park your Jeep.

0:00:35 > 0:00:37Oh, sorry, Barnster.

0:00:37 > 0:00:39What've you done to your face?

0:00:39 > 0:00:44- This is me patented pampering and personal grooming regime.- Groovy.

0:00:44 > 0:00:45It takes a lot for a koala

0:00:45 > 0:00:50- to look this naturally gorgeous and irresistible.- Oh, yeah?

0:00:51 > 0:00:54- HE SNIFFS - Oh, I'm getting a hint of honey...

0:00:54 > 0:00:57some ketchup in there, barbecue relish. Nice.

0:00:57 > 0:01:00Oh, a hint of avocado too. And...mayonnaise?

0:01:00 > 0:01:05Oh, yeah. This koala doesn't just like to moisturise,

0:01:05 > 0:01:07he likes to mayonnaise! Ha-ha!

0:01:08 > 0:01:13I got to stay looking good for a foxy-looking sheila like Doris.

0:01:13 > 0:01:17- Confidentially, Barnster, I'm getting a bit worried.- About what?

0:01:17 > 0:01:22It's Doris. I think she's going off me. We don't talk the way we used to.

0:01:22 > 0:01:27So, I'm pulling out all the stops to remind her what a catch I am!

0:01:27 > 0:01:29Sorry to hear that. I'm sure it'll be fine.

0:01:29 > 0:01:32Clear this mess before Mr Prank pops round.

0:01:32 > 0:01:34Angry Pants? No way, Jose.

0:01:34 > 0:01:37He's using our washing machine, his is broken.

0:01:37 > 0:01:40He's a caretaker but can't fix a washing machine.

0:01:40 > 0:01:44- I'm going to be late for work, see you later.- Love you.

0:01:44 > 0:01:47Keith, please be careful with the Jeep.

0:01:47 > 0:01:50- I'm hearing you, Barnster!- See you.

0:01:55 > 0:01:58- Hi, Barney.- Hey, Melanie, how's my favourite cousin?

0:01:58 > 0:01:59Wow! What've you got there?

0:01:59 > 0:02:01It's not a what, it's a who.

0:02:01 > 0:02:04His name's Clooney, he's the school guinea pig.

0:02:04 > 0:02:08It was my turn to look after him over the weekend.

0:02:08 > 0:02:12- I'm going to show Nev before taking him back to school.- Hello!

0:02:12 > 0:02:15Hello, Clooney-wooney, hello!

0:02:15 > 0:02:17He's cute!

0:02:17 > 0:02:21I'm glad you brought him round, Nev would love to see him.

0:02:21 > 0:02:22Were you going somewhere?

0:02:24 > 0:02:26Oh! Yes, right, work!

0:02:26 > 0:02:30I'm going to be later than late. See you!

0:02:31 > 0:02:35Right, how do I look?

0:02:35 > 0:02:37Ta-dah!

0:02:39 > 0:02:41Um...same.

0:02:41 > 0:02:43- Uh?- Tip-top-eroo!

0:02:43 > 0:02:47Ah! Ha-ha! I'll go and show Doris me new look!

0:02:48 > 0:02:50Groovy.

0:02:52 > 0:02:54Nev!

0:02:54 > 0:02:55Smelanie!

0:02:55 > 0:02:59I've got someone new for you to meet.

0:02:59 > 0:03:01Say hello to Clooney!

0:03:01 > 0:03:03Uh! Groovy!

0:03:10 > 0:03:13Oh! Love you, Clooney!

0:03:13 > 0:03:16KNOCK AT DOOR

0:03:16 > 0:03:17Cooee!

0:03:17 > 0:03:19Anyone home?

0:03:21 > 0:03:22Postie.

0:03:22 > 0:03:26Oh, Nev, I'm glad you're in.

0:03:26 > 0:03:28I've got this parcel for Mr Prank but...

0:03:28 > 0:03:32- he didn't seem to be in when I knocked.- Hmm...

0:03:32 > 0:03:33KNOCKING Cooee!

0:03:33 > 0:03:38Mr Prank, you lovely man, I've got a delivery for you!

0:03:40 > 0:03:43- Don't make a sound, Bandit.- Meow!

0:03:44 > 0:03:46She might go away!

0:03:47 > 0:03:51So I was wondering if I could leave this parcel with you?

0:03:51 > 0:03:52No problemo.

0:03:52 > 0:03:55Great. Hello, Melanie.

0:03:55 > 0:03:58Ooh, what have we got here?

0:03:58 > 0:04:00Postie, meet Clooney.

0:04:00 > 0:04:02Oh.

0:04:02 > 0:04:04Aw!

0:04:07 > 0:04:12Who is the most cutest guinea pig in the world?

0:04:12 > 0:04:14Yes, you are!

0:04:18 > 0:04:19Pffft!

0:04:21 > 0:04:24I know you're down there somewhere.

0:04:25 > 0:04:26Ha-ha!

0:04:26 > 0:04:32If Mr Barney's going to let me use his electricity and washing machine,

0:04:32 > 0:04:36I'll wash every pair of pants I can find. Ewww. Right, more.

0:04:38 > 0:04:40Aww, lovely Clooney.

0:04:40 > 0:04:41Aww!

0:04:43 > 0:04:45It's only me, Bear.

0:04:45 > 0:04:47I would have been over sooner,

0:04:47 > 0:04:52but I had to hide from that parcel pushing post pesterer. Ha-ha-ha!

0:04:52 > 0:04:57Oh, there you are, you gorgeous, handsome Mr Prank.

0:04:57 > 0:04:59I thought you weren't home.

0:04:59 > 0:05:04Well, well...yeah, you see, I had some important pants to attend to.

0:05:04 > 0:05:07Oh, what you got 'ere?

0:05:07 > 0:05:09Oh.

0:05:12 > 0:05:16Awwww...a-choo!

0:05:16 > 0:05:19HE SNEEZES

0:05:20 > 0:05:23I could get him out if you'd like a closer look?

0:05:23 > 0:05:25A-choo! No, no, no!

0:05:25 > 0:05:28One hairy monstrosity is enough.

0:05:28 > 0:05:30Grr...

0:05:34 > 0:05:38Wow. Angry Pants is even more allergic to Clooney than he is you.

0:05:52 > 0:05:56Oh, don't worry. Postie will make it all better.

0:05:57 > 0:05:59Blooming guinea pig!

0:05:59 > 0:06:02Right, better get you back to school, Clooney,

0:06:02 > 0:06:05before you set Angry Pants off again.

0:06:05 > 0:06:06Clooney?

0:06:06 > 0:06:09Hey, where did he go?

0:06:10 > 0:06:12SQUEAKS

0:06:16 > 0:06:18Mundo problemo.

0:06:21 > 0:06:26Ta-dah! So, what do you think, Doris darl?

0:06:26 > 0:06:27Am I looking good?

0:06:28 > 0:06:33Oh, come on, Doris! Give a koala a break, will you?

0:06:33 > 0:06:36You can't even look me in the eye any more.

0:06:36 > 0:06:39Actually, what are you looking at?

0:06:45 > 0:06:47G'day, stranger. Hee-hee!

0:06:47 > 0:06:50Normally I'm happy to make a new buddy

0:06:50 > 0:06:53but you've caught us at a bit of a bad time.

0:06:53 > 0:06:55Aww!

0:06:59 > 0:07:03Didger me doodah, you are a handsome fella!

0:07:03 > 0:07:06No wonder my Doris can't take her eyes off you.

0:07:06 > 0:07:09Well, you can't pinch my babe.

0:07:09 > 0:07:11Don't look, Doris.

0:07:16 > 0:07:18Wackadoo, Doris!

0:07:18 > 0:07:20Don't leave me!

0:07:23 > 0:07:27The nerve. Coming down here and trying to take a bear's beloved!

0:07:27 > 0:07:32Get out of here and take your twinkly eye with you!

0:07:34 > 0:07:35So long, buddy!

0:07:39 > 0:07:42- Clooney!- Where are you? - Where are you?

0:07:42 > 0:07:44Any sign of him, Mr Prank?

0:07:46 > 0:07:48Well, I'm not sneezing, am I?

0:07:51 > 0:07:52A-choo!

0:07:52 > 0:07:55- Yucky.- Out of my way, bear.

0:07:55 > 0:07:59If Clooney's not in here, then he must have wandered outside.

0:07:59 > 0:08:01- Let's go.- OK.

0:08:01 > 0:08:03Oh, ow, ow!

0:08:06 > 0:08:11Look, I can't spend all day upside down, I've got pants to wash.

0:08:11 > 0:08:13A-choo!

0:08:15 > 0:08:16- Clooney!- Aah!

0:08:18 > 0:08:23- Aw, look at you!- Let's get you back to school, where you're safe!

0:08:26 > 0:08:32Aw, poor Mr Prank. What you need is someone to look after you.

0:08:32 > 0:08:35What I need is to wash my pants!

0:08:37 > 0:08:40I've got to run. Say goodbye to everyone.

0:08:40 > 0:08:42Aww, bye-bye, Clooney!

0:08:42 > 0:08:46Aww, you're so cute! Bye!

0:08:48 > 0:08:53Oh, poor Mr Prank. If only he could see...

0:08:55 > 0:08:58I know!

0:09:01 > 0:09:03WAILS AND SOBS

0:09:03 > 0:09:07It's no good, Nevvy, it's over!

0:09:07 > 0:09:08What?

0:09:08 > 0:09:12Only the love story of the century. Me and Doris.

0:09:12 > 0:09:15We're finished! Waaaah!

0:09:19 > 0:09:23- No way, Jose.- Doris has dumped me for a hairy little blighter

0:09:23 > 0:09:25with a twinkle in his eye.

0:09:25 > 0:09:26Uh, Clooney!

0:09:26 > 0:09:29Oh, so that's his name, is it?

0:09:29 > 0:09:33Well, she's thinking about him right now. See?

0:09:34 > 0:09:36Oh, dear, oh, dear.

0:09:36 > 0:09:41Oh, last time I saw that light in her eyes, we were on Bondi Beach.

0:09:41 > 0:09:43I was a surfing superstar back then

0:09:43 > 0:09:46and Doris couldn't take her eyes off me.

0:09:46 > 0:09:48Oh...I know, I know!

0:09:50 > 0:09:51Nevvy?

0:09:51 > 0:09:52What?

0:09:53 > 0:09:54What on earth...

0:09:57 > 0:09:58Ta-dah!

0:09:59 > 0:10:03Where you going, Nevvy? Huh! Have you got an idea?

0:10:03 > 0:10:07Oh, I love you, buddy!

0:10:11 > 0:10:13Ha-ha!

0:10:13 > 0:10:15Awesome idea, Nevvy! Woo-hoo!

0:10:16 > 0:10:19Cowabunga! Remember Bondi, Doris?

0:10:19 > 0:10:22Ha-ha, are you impressed?

0:10:22 > 0:10:24TOILET FLUSHES

0:10:24 > 0:10:26Uh-oh!

0:10:26 > 0:10:27Keith...

0:10:27 > 0:10:30What is it, Nevvy?

0:10:31 > 0:10:33Huh! Wackadoo..!

0:10:34 > 0:10:36- SPLASH! - Crazy Keith!

0:10:36 > 0:10:38Wackadooooooo!

0:10:38 > 0:10:40Mundo problemo!

0:10:42 > 0:10:44You're going into the washing machine,

0:10:44 > 0:10:46if it's the last thing I do!

0:10:56 > 0:10:59Nevvvvvy!

0:10:59 > 0:11:04Funny, I've never heard a washing machine make that noise before.

0:11:07 > 0:11:09Right.

0:11:11 > 0:11:12BANG!

0:11:14 > 0:11:16Oh, come on!

0:11:16 > 0:11:18Why aren't you working?!

0:11:19 > 0:11:22NEVVVVVYYYY!

0:11:23 > 0:11:25Owww!

0:11:25 > 0:11:29Yikes, I've been in some tight spots before,

0:11:29 > 0:11:32but this one just takes the biscuit.

0:11:46 > 0:11:48I know, I know!

0:11:51 > 0:11:52Jibbidy-ya!

0:11:53 > 0:11:56Oh, crikey! The pressure's really building.

0:11:56 > 0:12:01If I don't unstick myself soon, something's going to blow! Oh!

0:12:01 > 0:12:03FLUSHING Cowabunga!

0:12:03 > 0:12:04Aaaargh!

0:12:08 > 0:12:09TOILET FLUSHES

0:12:09 > 0:12:13Aaaaaaaahhhh!

0:12:16 > 0:12:18Zoom!

0:12:26 > 0:12:31There must be some sort of blockage in the water system, I reckon.

0:12:33 > 0:12:34Come on, you!

0:12:34 > 0:12:36- HE SNIFFS - Phew. I got pants to wash!

0:12:43 > 0:12:45Aaaah!

0:12:45 > 0:12:46Aaaah!

0:12:46 > 0:12:48Crazy Keith!

0:12:48 > 0:12:50FLUSHING

0:12:50 > 0:12:52Aaaah, woo-hoo!

0:12:52 > 0:12:53Oooohhh!

0:12:53 > 0:12:56Three, two, one...

0:12:58 > 0:12:59Jibbidy-ya!

0:13:00 > 0:13:01Waah, wahhhh!

0:13:01 > 0:13:03CRASH!

0:13:06 > 0:13:11Oh, good. Sounds like I've managed to unblock the blockage!

0:13:22 > 0:13:24Good catch there, Nevvy!

0:13:24 > 0:13:25What do you say, Doris?

0:13:25 > 0:13:29Did the sight of me back on a surfboard relight your fire?

0:13:31 > 0:13:34Oh, not enough, eh?

0:13:34 > 0:13:37Oh, sorry, Crazy Keith.

0:13:37 > 0:13:42Oh, don't be, Nevvy. We just weren't thinking big enough, that's all.

0:13:42 > 0:13:44We need a bigger stunt,

0:13:44 > 0:13:48so this koala can prove he'll do anything to win his girl back.

0:13:49 > 0:13:52I know, I know! Angry Pants.

0:13:53 > 0:13:55Wackadoo, Nevvy!

0:13:55 > 0:13:58Only a true daredevil would take him on.

0:13:58 > 0:14:01Oh, ha-ha-ha!

0:14:05 > 0:14:09Eww, don't know what's wrong with that washing machine.

0:14:09 > 0:14:14Still, at least me pants got a good soaking if not a proper wash.

0:14:14 > 0:14:15Oh, right, well...

0:14:15 > 0:14:19I think I'll have a little kip after all that hard work.

0:14:19 > 0:14:21Now, there we are.

0:14:32 > 0:14:34So, Nevvy, what's the plan?

0:14:34 > 0:14:36Pants.

0:14:36 > 0:14:38Angry Pants. And...?

0:14:38 > 0:14:40Angry Pants' pants.

0:14:40 > 0:14:41Eh?

0:14:41 > 0:14:43Oh!

0:14:43 > 0:14:45Gotcha!

0:15:00 > 0:15:04You see, when you tie these undies together like this,

0:15:04 > 0:15:07they're pretty stretchy. Bit like a bungee,

0:15:07 > 0:15:10is that what you were thinking, Nevvy?

0:15:10 > 0:15:12Too right, bro.

0:15:14 > 0:15:16Whoa!

0:15:18 > 0:15:20Strewth, you want me to bungee jump

0:15:20 > 0:15:23right into Angry Pants' snoring great food chute?

0:15:23 > 0:15:25Too right, bro.

0:15:25 > 0:15:29Oh, that's crazy! That's crazier than crazy.

0:15:29 > 0:15:31It's brilliant!

0:15:31 > 0:15:33Love you, Crazy Keith.

0:15:33 > 0:15:35Ah, keep watching, Doris.

0:15:35 > 0:15:38See what I'll do to impress you and win you back?

0:15:38 > 0:15:41Oh, OK, here goes.

0:15:46 > 0:15:49Three, two, one, wackadoo!

0:15:52 > 0:15:53Crazy Keith!

0:15:53 > 0:16:00We appear to have miscalculated the relative sizes of Angry Pants' mouth

0:16:00 > 0:16:02and my head, Nevvy. I'm stuck!

0:16:05 > 0:16:09And, unless I'm very much mistaken, something's going to blow!

0:16:09 > 0:16:11Aaaah!

0:16:11 > 0:16:13Didger me doodah!

0:16:13 > 0:16:16NEVVVVVYY!

0:16:19 > 0:16:20Ouch.

0:16:23 > 0:16:26Not quite the heroic action we had in mind, Nevvy.

0:16:26 > 0:16:28Oh, dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.

0:16:33 > 0:16:37OK, Nevvy. Operation Bandit.

0:16:37 > 0:16:40This is sure to win the heart of my Doris.

0:16:40 > 0:16:41DISCO MUSIC PLAYS

0:16:41 > 0:16:46We find Bandit, I attract the mangy moggy's attention and then...

0:16:46 > 0:16:47run for me life!

0:16:48 > 0:16:52Hmm, too crazy, Crazy Keith. Frightened.

0:16:52 > 0:16:54You're frightened?

0:16:54 > 0:16:58Confidentially, Nevvy, I'm terrified!

0:16:58 > 0:17:02But if this is what it takes to set my Doris's pulse racing,

0:17:02 > 0:17:04I'm game!

0:17:07 > 0:17:10THEY WHISPER

0:17:26 > 0:17:30Are you watching, Doris darl? This is for you, babe!

0:17:30 > 0:17:32Dear, oh, dear, oh, dear.

0:17:32 > 0:17:34BANDIT SNORES

0:17:34 > 0:17:37Oh, right, here goes.

0:17:39 > 0:17:41HE KISSES BANDIT

0:17:43 > 0:17:45Aaaaaargh!

0:17:48 > 0:17:51Fishy, but not as bad as I was expecting.

0:17:51 > 0:17:52Meow!

0:17:52 > 0:17:55Aahh! Didger me doodah!

0:17:56 > 0:17:58Meow!

0:17:58 > 0:18:01Can you see me, Doris? Can you see me?!

0:18:01 > 0:18:02Meow!

0:18:02 > 0:18:04- Meow!- Aaaah!

0:18:06 > 0:18:08Mundo problemo.

0:18:14 > 0:18:17Don't know how my pants ended up like this.

0:18:17 > 0:18:20Or where that funny taste in my mouth came from.

0:18:20 > 0:18:23But I bet it's got something to do with that bear.

0:18:26 > 0:18:27Mr Prank, what happened?

0:18:27 > 0:18:29Eh?

0:18:29 > 0:18:31What are you wearing?

0:18:31 > 0:18:33Well, ever since you started sneezing,

0:18:33 > 0:18:37I've been wondering what would make you feel better?

0:18:37 > 0:18:40Oh. News of you leaving the country.

0:18:40 > 0:18:43Poor thing, you're clearly delirious.

0:18:43 > 0:18:48- Meow!- Aaaah! I've never felt so endangered in all me life! Aaah!

0:18:48 > 0:18:50- Crazy Keith!- Meow!

0:18:50 > 0:18:53Are you watching, Doris?

0:18:54 > 0:18:57- Can you see how much you mean to me? - Meow!- Aaaah!

0:18:57 > 0:19:00Mundo problemo!

0:19:00 > 0:19:05Oh, Mr Prank...I don't think I've ever felt so close to you.

0:19:05 > 0:19:09Yeah, that's what's worrying me. You got us all tangled up here.

0:19:09 > 0:19:12One good pull should sort it out.

0:19:12 > 0:19:13Aaah! Woo!

0:19:16 > 0:19:18Wackadoo!

0:19:19 > 0:19:21Oh, you beauty!

0:19:22 > 0:19:24Waaaah!

0:19:27 > 0:19:29TYRES SCREECH

0:19:29 > 0:19:32Keithy Boy has left the building!

0:19:32 > 0:19:34Woo-hoo-hoo!

0:19:37 > 0:19:39- Oh.- Get off!

0:19:39 > 0:19:41Ah-ha-ha!

0:19:41 > 0:19:43Free at last!

0:19:43 > 0:19:46Oh, yes.

0:19:46 > 0:19:48Huh! My post!

0:19:48 > 0:19:52Bear! I know you're responsible for this!

0:19:53 > 0:19:54D'you mind?

0:19:54 > 0:19:57- Get out my way, you...- Hello.

0:19:57 > 0:20:02- What's everyone doing here?- You... you know I'm always here to help.

0:20:02 > 0:20:06Postie's dropped her post, Mr Barney, sir. Oh, dear.

0:20:06 > 0:20:10If I help you pick it up, it'll be picked up faster, won't it?

0:20:10 > 0:20:12All right, Postie?

0:20:12 > 0:20:13Change of career?

0:20:25 > 0:20:27Wackadoo!

0:20:28 > 0:20:30Did anyone else hear that?

0:20:35 > 0:20:37Get off me, you manky moggy!

0:20:46 > 0:20:50Ah! I knew if I did something completely and utterly bonkers,

0:20:50 > 0:20:54Doris, you'd come running back to me! Oh, mwah!

0:20:54 > 0:20:56Take that, Clooney!

0:20:56 > 0:20:59- Aw!- Let's go, babe.

0:20:59 > 0:21:01ENGINE STARTS

0:21:02 > 0:21:05- There you go, mate. Super snug. - Aye, aye, Captain.

0:21:05 > 0:21:08I was thinking, seeing as Clooney was so cute,

0:21:08 > 0:21:11I think we should get a guinea pig.

0:21:11 > 0:21:13No way, Jose!

0:21:13 > 0:21:18OK, seeing as you feel so strongly about it, we won't bother.

0:21:18 > 0:21:19Sleep?

0:21:19 > 0:21:20- Yeah, yeah.- OK.

0:21:20 > 0:21:23- Love you, mate.- Love you, Barney.

0:21:26 > 0:21:29Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:21:29 > 0:21:32E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk