The Ugly Pageant

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0:00:40 > 0:00:43LOUD EATING

0:00:43 > 0:00:44Mm.

0:00:44 > 0:00:48Mattress flakes. Disgusting.

0:00:48 > 0:00:49Huh?

0:00:51 > 0:00:52Oh! You two!

0:00:52 > 0:00:54I need more snacks!

0:00:54 > 0:00:58But I was just about to have my mid-mid-mid-late morning nap.

0:00:58 > 0:01:02Shut up! If you can't be bothered fetching more stuff,

0:01:02 > 0:01:04catch Gumbles to fetch it for you.

0:01:04 > 0:01:05NOW!

0:01:07 > 0:01:08Now...

0:01:09 > 0:01:11Ah!

0:01:13 > 0:01:15GROANING

0:01:15 > 0:01:18Whoa-ho! Striiike!

0:01:19 > 0:01:21Actually, Tink...

0:01:21 > 0:01:23A little to the left next time.

0:01:23 > 0:01:24You mean...the right?

0:01:24 > 0:01:26That's what I said.

0:01:26 > 0:01:28An obliterator from the Tinkinator.

0:01:28 > 0:01:30Ready to admit defeat?

0:01:30 > 0:01:31Not likely.

0:01:31 > 0:01:33Ahhh!

0:01:33 > 0:01:35Competition update please, Willi?

0:01:35 > 0:01:37You bungeed further than Bounce at drop-off point.

0:01:37 > 0:01:40Bounce podium-ed more times around the Gumbletree.

0:01:40 > 0:01:42- So I guess...- Huh.

0:01:42 > 0:01:46Ah! Winning at body bowling will put me into the lead.

0:01:46 > 0:01:49- Take that, Bounce. - She's going to smash you.- Never.

0:01:49 > 0:01:52- Ooh!- Whoa-ho!- Whoa!

0:01:54 > 0:01:59Great, we've got to go all the way to the Gumbletree.

0:01:59 > 0:02:00Why's that, Snorg?

0:02:00 > 0:02:05Because, Glob, Gumbles don't just fall out of the sky.

0:02:05 > 0:02:06- Whoa!- Oh!- Ahhh!

0:02:06 > 0:02:08LOUD CRASH

0:02:08 > 0:02:12Ah! You're going to wish you hadn't done that.

0:02:12 > 0:02:15- Quick, to the right.- Huh?

0:02:15 > 0:02:17Gotcha, you little weasels.

0:02:17 > 0:02:19- THEY SHIVER - Ah...

0:02:19 > 0:02:21I mean left.

0:02:21 > 0:02:22Ugh.

0:02:22 > 0:02:25Here's an idea, Tink, learn your left from your right.

0:02:25 > 0:02:27What do you mean? I totally know my left from my right.

0:02:27 > 0:02:31Quiet! Fill this with stuffing or you'll get spanged.

0:02:31 > 0:02:33Start over there on the right.

0:02:35 > 0:02:37HE COUGHS

0:02:37 > 0:02:39- ECHOES:- Oh...- Huh?

0:02:39 > 0:02:42Oh. Uh-oh...

0:02:42 > 0:02:43Oh...

0:02:43 > 0:02:44Yaaah!

0:02:44 > 0:02:46Oh.

0:02:46 > 0:02:47SHE GASPS

0:02:47 > 0:02:49What's wrong?

0:02:49 > 0:02:53You must be the ugliest Snike on Snike Hill.

0:02:53 > 0:02:57Oi! I'm the ugliest Snike on Snike Hill.

0:02:57 > 0:03:03In fact, why don't we have a little contest to prove it?

0:03:03 > 0:03:04Chank.

0:03:05 > 0:03:10- Arrange an ugly pageant. - What an atrociously ingenious idea.

0:03:10 > 0:03:13And whom shall be the judge?

0:03:13 > 0:03:15Somebody clever.

0:03:15 > 0:03:16Oh.

0:03:16 > 0:03:17Trustworthy.

0:03:17 > 0:03:18Oh.

0:03:18 > 0:03:21And completely unbiased.

0:03:21 > 0:03:22Me!

0:03:22 > 0:03:24Huh.

0:03:24 > 0:03:27Will you just stop? It was not my fault we got caught.

0:03:27 > 0:03:30- It was your idea to body bowl so close to Snike Hill.- Urgh!

0:03:30 > 0:03:32Let's just agree to disagree.

0:03:32 > 0:03:35I'm not agreeing with anything you say ever again.

0:03:35 > 0:03:36Look where it gets me.

0:03:36 > 0:03:38Why can't they ever just...?

0:03:38 > 0:03:40Whoa! Oh!

0:03:40 > 0:03:41Ugh.

0:03:41 > 0:03:43HE GROANS AND COUGHS

0:03:43 > 0:03:45'What's the hold up?'

0:03:46 > 0:03:47(Bottersnikes.)

0:03:49 > 0:03:51'Ready, Your Grumpsness.'

0:03:51 > 0:03:54CLEARS THROAT MICROPHONE BUZZES

0:03:54 > 0:03:58Welcome to the ugly pageant.

0:03:58 > 0:04:01'We'll be finding out which of these Snikes

0:04:01 > 0:04:03'is more hideous than the rest.'

0:04:03 > 0:04:04Ha!

0:04:04 > 0:04:06Our first contestant is Snorg...

0:04:09 > 0:04:13..who is as thoroughly useless as our second contestant,

0:04:13 > 0:04:15Gubbo.

0:04:15 > 0:04:17Raaar!

0:04:17 > 0:04:19Keep moving, Buttershrimp.

0:04:19 > 0:04:25Next up, we have Weathersnike, who predicts she will be crowned winner.

0:04:25 > 0:04:28Hee-hee. Ugh.

0:04:28 > 0:04:33But as none of her predictions ever come true, I wouldn't count on it.

0:04:33 > 0:04:37How come this sniffless little worm isn't taking part?

0:04:37 > 0:04:40Because I'm too important.

0:04:40 > 0:04:44You mean you're not ugly enough. Ha-ha!

0:04:45 > 0:04:47Smiggles is...

0:04:47 > 0:04:49HE SNORES

0:04:49 > 0:04:50..Smiggles.

0:04:52 > 0:04:56FUNKY MUSIC PLAYS

0:05:01 > 0:05:02Uh.

0:05:02 > 0:05:04And our final contestant is Glob,

0:05:04 > 0:05:09who has been known to get lost trying to find his own tail.

0:05:09 > 0:05:11Oh? Uh...

0:05:11 > 0:05:14It always runs away!

0:05:14 > 0:05:19Ha! This is the most pitiful, un-repulsive bunch of Bottersnikes

0:05:19 > 0:05:21I've ever seen.

0:05:21 > 0:05:26I'll need to use the might of the royal brain to pick a winner.

0:05:26 > 0:05:30And the royal brain work on an empty tummy.

0:05:30 > 0:05:32So fetch me a snack!

0:05:34 > 0:05:37Bounce, Tink, you'll never guess what I found.

0:05:37 > 0:05:39Oh, yeah. What?

0:05:39 > 0:05:41Um, nothing.

0:05:42 > 0:05:45This is nothing. Dig faster.

0:05:45 > 0:05:48Or I'll put Gumbles on the menu instead.

0:05:48 > 0:05:52And don't even think about trying to escape.

0:05:52 > 0:05:55Us? Try to escape? As if.

0:05:55 > 0:05:57Rrrrrr.

0:05:57 > 0:05:59- So, here's the escape plan.- Guys...

0:05:59 > 0:06:00You've got to see this.

0:06:00 > 0:06:01- Step one...- Nuh-uh.

0:06:01 > 0:06:04This time, I'm going to come up with an escape plan.

0:06:04 > 0:06:06- Both of you, listen.- Ha!

0:06:06 > 0:06:09- You come up with an escape plan? - What's funny about that?

0:06:09 > 0:06:11It's just not what you...you do.

0:06:11 > 0:06:15- I'm the ideas Gumble. - Hello. I found a secret tunnel.

0:06:15 > 0:06:18Willi says unimportant stuff about tunnels. And you...

0:06:18 > 0:06:21You're not even listening, are you?

0:06:21 > 0:06:24Fine. Then I'll see myself out.

0:06:24 > 0:06:26- Enjoy your stay.- ..ideas Gumble.

0:06:26 > 0:06:28Uh!

0:06:28 > 0:06:30I'll show those two.

0:06:30 > 0:06:32A little further and I'm out of here.

0:06:34 > 0:06:37- WILLI GROANS - Baaaaarp!

0:06:37 > 0:06:38Or maybe not.

0:06:38 > 0:06:41Baaaaaaarp!

0:06:41 > 0:06:44Hm. Hardly stinky at all.

0:06:44 > 0:06:47Baaaaaarp!

0:06:47 > 0:06:50Hm. Almost floral.

0:06:50 > 0:06:53Gyah.

0:06:53 > 0:06:55BAAAAAAAAARRP!

0:06:55 > 0:06:57THEY GASP

0:06:57 > 0:07:01Humph. The best of a barely whiffy bunch...

0:07:01 > 0:07:04Glob wins the smelliest burp round.

0:07:04 > 0:07:05Yay!

0:07:05 > 0:07:09Chank, on with the waxiest ears round.

0:07:10 > 0:07:12Ah!

0:07:12 > 0:07:15GROANING

0:07:17 > 0:07:20Minuscule.

0:07:20 > 0:07:23GROANING

0:07:25 > 0:07:29Gubbo wins the waxiest ear round.

0:07:29 > 0:07:33- But Glob hasn't had a go. - Suck it up, loser.

0:07:33 > 0:07:35- Oh!- Ha-ha-ha-ha.

0:07:35 > 0:07:40SHOUTS AND GRUMBLING

0:07:40 > 0:07:42I guess Bounce and Tink aren't that bad.

0:07:42 > 0:07:45Hmm. Now I feel bad for leaving them.

0:07:45 > 0:07:47Enough!

0:07:47 > 0:07:50I've made my final decision.

0:07:50 > 0:07:53The winner of the ugly pageant is...

0:07:55 > 0:07:56..me!

0:07:56 > 0:08:00But, Your Vileness, you're the judge.

0:08:00 > 0:08:02You're not even a contestulant.

0:08:02 > 0:08:05I know that, you fools.

0:08:05 > 0:08:09But none of you hold a candle to my regal repulsiveness.

0:08:09 > 0:08:13And I do love cheating ever so much. Ha-ha-ha!

0:08:13 > 0:08:19Now, make a trophy to celebrate my gloriously disgusting victory,

0:08:19 > 0:08:22while I have my ugly sleep.

0:08:22 > 0:08:24HE SNORES

0:08:24 > 0:08:26What a fix!

0:08:26 > 0:08:30Ugliest Snike? Stinkiest cheat.

0:08:30 > 0:08:31Shut up with your moaning!

0:08:31 > 0:08:37I'm the ugliest Snike, and what I say goes.

0:08:37 > 0:08:39Ah! The ugliest Snike.

0:08:39 > 0:08:41So...how do I look?

0:08:41 > 0:08:43- Ridiculous. - You won't be saying that

0:08:43 > 0:08:47when I stroll out of here without a second glance. Um...

0:08:47 > 0:08:48Let me know how that goes.

0:08:48 > 0:08:52Meanwhile, I'll be using these to bounce past the Snikes.

0:08:52 > 0:08:54BOING!

0:08:54 > 0:08:56Huh. Oh!

0:08:56 > 0:08:57Ha-ha-ha! Awesome plan.

0:08:57 > 0:09:00It was better than yours, cos I'm better than you at...

0:09:00 > 0:09:02Oh, let me think.

0:09:02 > 0:09:03..everything.

0:09:03 > 0:09:05- Oh, yeah?- Yeah.

0:09:05 > 0:09:07Then let's settle it once and for all.

0:09:07 > 0:09:09- Somehow. - I've got a competition for you.

0:09:09 > 0:09:10If you're interested.

0:09:13 > 0:09:16- Why didn't you tell us about this place sooner?- Who knows?

0:09:18 > 0:09:19Careful, keep to the right.

0:09:19 > 0:09:21Oof!

0:09:21 > 0:09:24OK. I might have a slight problem with left and right.

0:09:26 > 0:09:29THEY STRAIN

0:09:32 > 0:09:35HE SNORES

0:09:41 > 0:09:44SNORING CONTINUES

0:09:49 > 0:09:50Huh?

0:09:52 > 0:09:54LOUD SNORING

0:09:54 > 0:09:55Hmm.

0:10:00 > 0:10:02Ready?

0:10:03 > 0:10:06DRILLING

0:10:06 > 0:10:09HE STRAINS

0:10:09 > 0:10:10Huh?

0:10:13 > 0:10:15Oh...

0:10:19 > 0:10:24Hee-hee. Finished, Your Revoltingness.

0:10:25 > 0:10:28Oh, about time.

0:10:28 > 0:10:30THEY GASP

0:10:30 > 0:10:32What are you gawping at?

0:10:32 > 0:10:35How fantastically ugly I am?

0:10:35 > 0:10:37You're... You're...

0:10:37 > 0:10:39- SHE RETCHES - ..gorgeous.

0:10:40 > 0:10:42Oh. Oh...

0:10:42 > 0:10:43OH!

0:10:43 > 0:10:44HE SNIFFS

0:10:44 > 0:10:46Ugh! Ew!

0:10:46 > 0:10:48And you smell... Urgh.

0:10:48 > 0:10:49..delightful.

0:10:49 > 0:10:52Argh! Who did this?!

0:10:52 > 0:10:55- No!- No, no.- Wasn't me.- Wasn't me.

0:10:55 > 0:10:57Raaaar!

0:10:57 > 0:11:00Arrghhhhh!

0:11:00 > 0:11:03THEY SCREAM

0:11:09 > 0:11:10I know that I'm the ideas Gumble,

0:11:10 > 0:11:12but that was a nifty escape plan, Willi.

0:11:12 > 0:11:14Playing us off against each other.

0:11:14 > 0:11:16Show us that as long as we beat the Bottersnikes,

0:11:16 > 0:11:19it doesn't matter who the best Gumble is.

0:11:20 > 0:11:24Oh. Yeah. That was totally the plan. Though...

0:11:24 > 0:11:27helping us to escape does sort of make me the best Gumble.

0:11:28 > 0:11:30In your face, wompbags!

0:11:30 > 0:11:33Woooo!

0:11:33 > 0:11:34He-he-he-he!

0:11:34 > 0:11:37- BOTH:- I don't know where he gets it from.

0:11:37 > 0:11:40THEY LAUGH