Ted Robbins - Burglar Bill: Part Two

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0:38:50 > 0:38:57.

0:39:07 > 0:39:09Hello, I'm Ted.

0:39:09 > 0:39:12I am pleased you've come to see me again,

0:39:12 > 0:39:16as I'm almost ready to finish the second part of Burglar Bill,

0:39:16 > 0:39:19which was written by Janet and Allan Ahlberg.

0:39:19 > 0:39:24Now, yesterday I told you all about naughty Burglar Bill

0:39:24 > 0:39:27who takes things that don't belong to him.

0:39:27 > 0:39:33He had a big surprise one day when he took a box which had a baby inside.

0:39:33 > 0:39:36Burglar Bill fed and played with the baby

0:39:36 > 0:39:39and then put the baby to bed after a busy day.

0:39:39 > 0:39:44Suddenly, a strange noise wakes up Burglar Bill.

0:39:44 > 0:39:50"Blow me down," says Burglar Bill. "I'm being burgled!"

0:39:50 > 0:39:54Burglar Bill creeps to the top of the stairs.

0:39:54 > 0:39:59Down below, a torch is shining and a voice says,

0:39:59 > 0:40:02"That's a nice umbrella. I'll have that."

0:40:02 > 0:40:05Burglar Bill creeps down the stairs.

0:40:05 > 0:40:10The voice says, "Ooh, that's a nice tin of beans. I'll have that."

0:40:10 > 0:40:14Burglar Bill creeps along the hall and into the kitchen.

0:40:14 > 0:40:17The voice says, "That's a nice date and walnut cake

0:40:17 > 0:40:21"with buttercream filling and icing on top. I'll have that."

0:40:22 > 0:40:24Burglar Bill puts on the light.

0:40:24 > 0:40:26HE GASPS

0:40:26 > 0:40:29There, with a black mask over her eyes

0:40:29 > 0:40:32and her hand in the bread bin, stands a lady.

0:40:33 > 0:40:36"Who are you?" says Burglar Bill.

0:40:36 > 0:40:41"I'm Burglar Betty," says the lady. "Who are you?"

0:40:41 > 0:40:44Burglar Bill puts on his own mask.

0:40:44 > 0:40:48"Oh," says Burglar Betty. "I know you. It's Burglar Bill.

0:40:48 > 0:40:52"I've seen your picture in the police gazette."

0:40:52 > 0:40:57Then she says, "Look here. I'm ever so sorry, breaking in like this.

0:40:57 > 0:41:01"If I'd have known..." "Oh! Don't mention it," says Burglar Bill.

0:41:01 > 0:41:05He holds out his hand. "Pleased to meet you."

0:41:05 > 0:41:09"Likewise, I'm sure," Burglar Betty says.

0:41:09 > 0:41:14Burglar Bill makes a jug of cocoa and opens a pack of ginger biscuits.

0:41:14 > 0:41:17The two burglars sit around the kitchen table.

0:41:18 > 0:41:22"You married, Bill?" says Burglar Betty.

0:41:22 > 0:41:26"No," says Burglar Bill. "The right woman never come along."

0:41:26 > 0:41:29He offers the biscuits to Burglar Betty.

0:41:29 > 0:41:32She takes one and dips it in her cocoa.

0:41:32 > 0:41:37"Only, I just wondered," she says, "seeing these baby things."

0:41:37 > 0:41:40"Oh, I've got a baby," says Burglar Bill.

0:41:40 > 0:41:43"Found it on a doorstep in a box."

0:41:43 > 0:41:46"In a box?" says Burglar Betty.

0:41:46 > 0:41:48"That's right," says Burglar Bill.

0:41:48 > 0:41:52"A big brown box with little holes in it."

0:41:52 > 0:41:58"A big BROWN box with little holes in it?" says Burglar Betty.

0:41:58 > 0:42:00"That's right," says Burglar Bill.

0:42:00 > 0:42:06"Well, blow me down," says Burglar Betty. "That baby's mine."

0:42:06 > 0:42:09The two burglars hurry upstairs to the baby's room.

0:42:09 > 0:42:10HE GASPS

0:42:10 > 0:42:15"That's him," says Burglar Betty. She swings the baby in the air.

0:42:15 > 0:42:18"He's got this birthmark on his leg.

0:42:18 > 0:42:23"And these are his own little clothes as well, what his Grandma knit him."

0:42:23 > 0:42:27Back in the kitchen, Burglar Bill makes a fresh jug of cocoa

0:42:27 > 0:42:30and opens a packet of arrowroot biscuits.

0:42:30 > 0:42:34Meanwhile, Burglar Betty tells him how she lost the baby.

0:42:35 > 0:42:38"I just left him on that doorstep for a minute

0:42:38 > 0:42:43"while I was burgling the house and when I come out, he was gone.

0:42:43 > 0:42:46"I thought the police had got him."

0:42:46 > 0:42:50"I only thought it was a useful sort of box," says Burglar Bill.

0:42:50 > 0:42:53"I never knowed there was a baby in there till I got it home."

0:42:53 > 0:42:56Burglar Betty gets ready to leave.

0:42:56 > 0:42:57HE SIGHS

0:42:57 > 0:43:01"I suppose your husband'll be glad when you get back,"

0:43:01 > 0:43:02says Burglar Bill.

0:43:02 > 0:43:06"No, he won't," says Burglar Betty. "I ain't got no husband."

0:43:06 > 0:43:07HE SNIFFS

0:43:07 > 0:43:12She dabs a little hanky to her eyes. "You see, I'm a widow lady."

0:43:12 > 0:43:14HE WHIMPERS

0:43:14 > 0:43:18Burglar Bill walks through the town with Burglar Betty and the baby.

0:43:19 > 0:43:21HE TUTS

0:43:21 > 0:43:23"You know, Betty," he says.

0:43:23 > 0:43:27"Getting burgled like that, it give me a fright."

0:43:27 > 0:43:30"I know what you mean," says Burglar Betty.

0:43:30 > 0:43:33"Losing my baby like that give me a fright."

0:43:34 > 0:43:38"I can see the error of my ways," says Burglar Bill.

0:43:38 > 0:43:41"I've been a bad man."

0:43:43 > 0:43:47"Me too," says Burglar Betty. "I've been a bad woman.

0:43:47 > 0:43:51"I've been a terrible woman."

0:43:51 > 0:43:55Just then, the baby starts to cry. "Shh," says Burglar Betty.

0:43:55 > 0:44:00"You'll have the police after us." Burglar Bill looks over his shoulder.

0:44:00 > 0:44:04"From now on, I'm going to lead an honest life," he says,

0:44:04 > 0:44:07"and all them things I've pinched..."

0:44:07 > 0:44:11"All them things I've pinched as well," says Burglar Betty.

0:44:11 > 0:44:13"All them things," says Burglar Bill,

0:44:13 > 0:44:17"mine and yours, Betty, we're going to...take them back."

0:44:18 > 0:44:24So, Burglar Bill stops being a burglar and, after a time,

0:44:24 > 0:44:28starts working as a bread man in the local bakery.

0:44:28 > 0:44:31Burglar Betty stops being a burglar as well.

0:44:31 > 0:44:33When spring comes, she sells her house

0:44:33 > 0:44:37and gives the money to the police benevolent fund.

0:44:37 > 0:44:41Then she gets married to Burglar Bill.

0:44:41 > 0:44:42WEDDING BELLS CHIME

0:44:42 > 0:44:47Outside the church, Bill stands with the baby in his arms.

0:44:47 > 0:44:52"Say, 'Bakery Bill'," he says. "Bakery Bill," says the baby.

0:44:53 > 0:44:59"Say, 'For he's a jolly good fellow for marrying my mum'," says Bill.

0:44:59 > 0:45:05"Say, 'For she's a jolly good fellow for marrying him'," Betty says.

0:45:05 > 0:45:08In the distance, the town hall clock strikes four.

0:45:09 > 0:45:15Bill, Betty and the baby leave the church, walk down the little street,

0:45:15 > 0:45:20behind the police station and go home to have their tea.

0:45:22 > 0:45:25That story was called Burglar Bill.

0:45:25 > 0:45:28I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did.

0:45:28 > 0:45:32Burglar Bill and Burglar Betty were very naughty, weren't they?

0:45:32 > 0:45:35It's good that they both changed their ways

0:45:35 > 0:45:39and I know they will live happily and honestly ever after.

0:45:41 > 0:45:44Well, it's time for YOU to have happy dreams now,

0:45:44 > 0:45:47so off you go and get tucked up in bed.

0:45:47 > 0:45:50Sleep well and I'll see you again very soon.