0:00:00 > 0:00:02# Chuckle, ChuckleVision Ch-ChuckleVision
0:00:02 > 0:00:04# Ch-Ch-ChuckleVison
0:00:13 > 0:00:16# Ch-Ch-ChuckleVision Ch-ChuckleVision
0:00:16 > 0:00:19# Ch-ChuckleVison. #
0:00:20 > 0:00:23VOICE ON TELEVISION
0:00:23 > 0:00:26There you go - breakfast.
0:00:26 > 0:00:28Oh, lovely, thanks.
0:00:30 > 0:00:34Eugh! That doesn't taste like my usual multi-grain wheaty-pops!
0:00:34 > 0:00:36I'm not surprised.
0:00:36 > 0:00:38- It's bird seed.- Bird seed!
0:00:38 > 0:00:41Are you trying to turn me into a budgie?!
0:00:41 > 0:00:46- You'll be giving me worms next! - Huh! Worms! The very idea!
0:00:46 > 0:00:49The thing is, we're a bit hard up.
0:00:52 > 0:00:55HE CHUCKLES
0:00:55 > 0:00:58At this rate I'm going to be losing weight!
0:00:59 > 0:01:02And another thing - we're all out of biscuits. >
0:01:02 > 0:01:04Not to worry...
0:01:04 > 0:01:08I'm not over-keen on biscuits, anyway.
0:01:11 > 0:01:15'Are you the winner of this week's Jumping Jackpot?
0:01:15 > 0:01:19'If so, bring the winning ticket to HQ by 12 noon today.
0:01:19 > 0:01:24- '£50,000 is waiting for you. Watch closely - is this you?'- Look at that!
0:01:24 > 0:01:28Some idiot's... Hang on -
0:01:28 > 0:01:31that's Barry! Barry's won!
0:01:31 > 0:01:33- Barry! Barry!- Yes?
0:01:33 > 0:01:36Er...nothing.
0:01:36 > 0:01:39I've won. I've won £50,000!
0:01:39 > 0:01:41All I need's the ticket.
0:01:41 > 0:01:43Two hours to go.
0:01:43 > 0:01:47- I've won! I've won, I've won, I've won!- What did you say?
0:01:47 > 0:01:52- A bun, a bun! I need a bun.- Oh. I'll see if there's one in the kitchen.
0:01:52 > 0:01:55I must look for it, I must find the ticket.
0:01:59 > 0:02:01Must find it! Must find it, must find it!
0:02:01 > 0:02:03You really DO want a bun!
0:02:03 > 0:02:06More than anything I've ever wanted in all my life.
0:02:06 > 0:02:09Where is it? Where is it?
0:02:09 > 0:02:13- Why don't you have a lie-down? It must be the hunger.- Hang on...
0:02:13 > 0:02:18- Why am I searching all the cupboards and drawers? YOU'VE got it!- Eh?
0:02:18 > 0:02:22- Come here, let's have a look! - What are you doing?!- Come back!
0:02:22 > 0:02:26Come here, you! Right, where have you put it?
0:02:26 > 0:02:29- Where's the ticket?- Ticket?
0:02:29 > 0:02:33- Eh, cricket...bat.- Cricket bat? I thought you wanted a bun.
0:02:34 > 0:02:38'The winning ticket was bought on Florabel Street last Wednesday...'
0:02:38 > 0:02:43- Florabel Street? That's where I bought MY ticket!- Barry...
0:02:43 > 0:02:47- you know you've always said what's yours is mine?- If you say so.
0:02:47 > 0:02:49D'you mind if I have that in writing?
0:02:49 > 0:02:51Hey, I've won!
0:02:51 > 0:02:54I've won the Jumping Jackpot!
0:02:54 > 0:02:57- Nonsense!- I'm rich! Rich beyond my wildest dreams!
0:02:57 > 0:03:00You're right - we're rich!
0:03:00 > 0:03:02- Where's the ticket?- Let me think...
0:03:11 > 0:03:14- I've no idea.- You stupid...!
0:03:14 > 0:03:18We've wasted quarter of an hour.
0:03:20 > 0:03:23There, that's everything out of the house.
0:03:23 > 0:03:27The only thing left in there MUST be the ticket. Barry, bring it out.
0:03:27 > 0:03:30We're gonna be rich!
0:03:30 > 0:03:32That's not the ticket!
0:03:32 > 0:03:36I know. I've had a thought. Whenever I take a library book out,
0:03:36 > 0:03:40- I use the Jackpot ticket as a bookmark.- Where's your book?
0:03:40 > 0:03:43I took it back to the library.
0:03:45 > 0:03:49There's nothing to worry about. We'll go in the library,
0:03:49 > 0:03:52find the book, open it up and get the ticket.
0:03:52 > 0:03:55It's 5 to 11. That gives us 1 hour and 5 minutes.
0:03:55 > 0:04:00- What was the book's title?- "Bobby Fandango, Space Detective."- Great.
0:04:00 > 0:04:04Or was it, "Seymour Wilson, Underwater Agent"?
0:04:04 > 0:04:09- What?- Oh, no, it could have been, "Colin Butterworth Jungle Assassin."
0:04:09 > 0:04:12Oh, dear, oh, dear! Come on.
0:04:17 > 0:04:19I remember now!
0:04:19 > 0:04:22- "Matt Flash, Pyschic Spy"! - Ssh!- Sorry.
0:04:24 > 0:04:27Spies, spies, spies,
0:04:27 > 0:04:29spies... There it is!
0:04:29 > 0:04:32Somebody's got it!
0:04:34 > 0:04:36I wouldn't read that if I was you.
0:04:36 > 0:04:42I don't want to spoil it for you but...the mermaid's a double agent.
0:04:43 > 0:04:45Thanks a lot(!)
0:04:45 > 0:04:47We're rich! We're rich!
0:04:47 > 0:04:50Eh? It's not there!
0:04:50 > 0:04:53Oh, dear. It's the wrong book.
0:04:53 > 0:04:57I forgot to tell you. In the Matt Flash series there are 98 volumes.
0:04:57 > 0:05:01There's only one thing for it - start shaking.
0:05:01 > 0:05:03- Not like that - the books!- Oh.
0:05:06 > 0:05:09Tut-tut! Gentlemen, do you mind?
0:05:11 > 0:05:14What are we going to do now?
0:05:17 > 0:05:21You don't have to stack the books. We have staff to do that.
0:05:21 > 0:05:23We're not stacking them - we're taking them out.
0:05:23 > 0:05:26How many books have you got there?
0:05:26 > 0:05:28One, two, three...98.
0:05:28 > 0:05:32- You can't take out 98 books on one ticket.- How many CAN we take out?
0:05:32 > 0:05:34Five.
0:05:38 > 0:05:42No, the ticket's not here. Let's go and get another five.
0:05:45 > 0:05:50- Another five. We're finished with those.- You've read those already?
0:05:50 > 0:05:54- We're speed readers.- When I read "Round The World In 80 Days"
0:05:54 > 0:05:55it only took 40!
0:05:55 > 0:05:57Ow!
0:06:00 > 0:06:04- Bringing those back. Another five, please.- Ah...
0:06:04 > 0:06:09I'm sorry to say, gentlemen, you've reached your weekly quota.
0:06:11 > 0:06:13Don't worry, Barry.
0:06:13 > 0:06:17Nothing chucks a Stopple... I mean, stops a Chuckle.
0:06:24 > 0:06:29Hello, dear! Me and my friend would like to take out these five books.
0:06:29 > 0:06:34- We do like a good spy novel, don't we, Mabel?- Yes, we do, Edna.
0:06:34 > 0:06:39So if you wouldn't mind stamping them with your shiny little stamp...
0:06:39 > 0:06:43You must think I was born yesterday! Get out of my library
0:06:43 > 0:06:48- or I'll call the police.- You can't talk to me like that - I'm 87 and...
0:06:48 > 0:06:52- Oh, forget it. Barry, let's go.- No, that's it. The name of the book.
0:06:52 > 0:06:57- "Matt Flash And The Secret Police." - SHE LAUGHS
0:06:57 > 0:07:02"Matt Flash And The Secret Police" was taken out not five minutes ago.
0:07:02 > 0:07:04Who took it? What did he look like?
0:07:04 > 0:07:09Let me think...I've got a dreadful memory, you know.
0:07:09 > 0:07:13Come on, tell us, or we'll... we'll mess your paper-clips up!
0:07:13 > 0:07:155' 11", dark hair, grey suit.
0:07:15 > 0:07:18That's better. Barry...
0:07:18 > 0:07:20mess them up, anyway.
0:07:21 > 0:07:23No-o-o-o!
0:07:24 > 0:07:29Can't have gone far. 20 past 11 - 40 minutes to go.
0:07:29 > 0:07:31There he is, look!
0:07:42 > 0:07:46Help! He's being attacked by a wasp! Have you something to swat it with?
0:07:46 > 0:07:49Preferably a book. That one will do!
0:07:52 > 0:07:55Ooh. Barry, are you all right?
0:07:55 > 0:07:56What happened?
0:07:56 > 0:07:59- I swatted you with a book. - Are we rich?
0:07:59 > 0:08:01Not exactly, no.
0:08:01 > 0:08:03Oh, dear...
0:08:05 > 0:08:08There he is, look!
0:08:09 > 0:08:11Eh? He's moving house!
0:08:11 > 0:08:15It might end up in Australia! We'll never get THERE in half an hour!
0:08:15 > 0:08:18We've got to get in there.
0:08:18 > 0:08:20Here, follow me.
0:08:38 > 0:08:41- Here, remind me when it's your birthday.- What for?
0:08:41 > 0:08:46I'll buy you a proper bookmark. Check out the mantelpiece.
0:08:47 > 0:08:50- SMASH! - Oh!- What was that?
0:08:50 > 0:08:54- What was what?- Haven't I seen you two somewhere before?
0:08:54 > 0:08:57Yes, this morning when we started to move your furniture.
0:08:57 > 0:09:02Well, I have to be at work at 12. You will be careful, won't you?
0:09:02 > 0:09:06There are a lot of valuables in this room.
0:09:07 > 0:09:10Ooh! 25 minutes!
0:09:10 > 0:09:12Here, check out that box.
0:09:12 > 0:09:16Hang on! What if he's found the ticket and he's put it in a safe?
0:09:16 > 0:09:19You're right. Safe, safe...
0:09:19 > 0:09:20Aah!
0:09:20 > 0:09:25Some people hide safes behind pictures on walls.
0:09:25 > 0:09:27- How d'you know that?- Just a hunch.
0:09:29 > 0:09:31Oh, no, it's not there.
0:09:32 > 0:09:35- Oh!- You stupid thing! Look what you've done!
0:09:37 > 0:09:40Oh, no! 24 minutes! Gotta find the book!
0:09:40 > 0:09:41Find the book!
0:09:41 > 0:09:43- Find the bo...
0:09:44 > 0:09:46Where's the book?
0:09:46 > 0:09:47Eh, I've got it!
0:09:47 > 0:09:50- What?- I've got it!
0:09:50 > 0:09:52- HE SNEEZES:- Atchoo!
0:09:52 > 0:09:54After it!
0:09:54 > 0:09:56Have you got it?
0:09:56 > 0:09:58It's gone inside.
0:09:58 > 0:10:01FOOTSTEPS OUTSIDE
0:10:12 > 0:10:16That's torn it! What are we gonna do now?
0:10:16 > 0:10:20I'm not going to let £50,000 go just like that. Follow that sofa!
0:10:34 > 0:10:37- Any luck?- Not exactly, no.
0:10:37 > 0:10:39- What d'you mean?- My arm's stuck!
0:10:39 > 0:10:41You what?!
0:10:54 > 0:10:56Oi!
0:11:37 > 0:11:42- Thanks for the lift.- Here we are, the Jumping Jackpot headquarters.
0:11:42 > 0:11:46We're almost there. Three minutes to go. Get this inside
0:11:46 > 0:11:49- then we can get that ticket out.- Right.
0:11:57 > 0:11:59Oh!
0:11:59 > 0:12:01This is no time to rest!
0:12:01 > 0:12:05- Sorry!- Find the ticket. And this time don't get stuck.
0:12:05 > 0:12:07It's no use, I can't find it.
0:12:07 > 0:12:09Wait here.
0:12:11 > 0:12:13- Ha-ha!- Where did you get that?
0:12:13 > 0:12:17Tool-hire shop next door. Stand back, sparks are going to fly.
0:12:21 > 0:12:23Got it!
0:12:23 > 0:12:26Great! 30 seconds to go.
0:12:26 > 0:12:28Ring the bell, Barry.
0:12:28 > 0:12:30Shop! We've come to collect our 50 grand.
0:12:30 > 0:12:35I can't wait to see his face when he sees us, eh?!
0:12:35 > 0:12:39- It's HIM!- YOU?! What are YOU doing here?
0:12:39 > 0:12:42We've come to collect our £50,000.
0:12:42 > 0:12:44Would that be my sofa, by any chance?
0:12:44 > 0:12:47Possibly. We're very sorry.
0:12:47 > 0:12:49We'll pay for all the damages.
0:12:49 > 0:12:53Well, gentlemen, everything seems to be in order so...
0:12:53 > 0:12:57that's £50,000!
0:12:57 > 0:13:01Minus, of course, the cost of my sofa...
0:13:01 > 0:13:06- Was it expensive, then?- No, the sofa was hardly worth anything.
0:13:06 > 0:13:08No, it was the rest of the stuff that was priceless.
0:13:08 > 0:13:13- One Georgian ceramic Pekingese... - Oh, that old rubbish!
0:13:13 > 0:13:16- ..£10,000.- What?!
0:13:16 > 0:13:20And an oil painting, "Monkey At Sunset" by Florence Fawcett...
0:13:20 > 0:13:24£39,000.
0:13:24 > 0:13:27Leaving you, gentlemen, with...
0:13:27 > 0:13:30- £1.- £1?!
0:13:30 > 0:13:33- One measly pound?! - What can you get for a pound?
0:13:33 > 0:13:36Tell you what...
0:13:36 > 0:13:37you could buy...
0:13:37 > 0:13:40another ticket!
0:13:40 > 0:13:43HE LAUGHS
0:13:45 > 0:13:47# Ch-Ch-ChuckleVision Ch-ChuckleVision
0:13:47 > 0:13:49# Ch-Ch-ChuckleVision... #
0:13:53 > 0:13:57Could have been Colin Ibbitson. ..Nothing like Colin Ibbitson!
0:13:57 > 0:14:01- He went to school with you.- He did. Could have been Colin Butterworth...