Frankensquawk's Monster

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0:00:05 > 0:00:07Chief!

0:00:08 > 0:00:10# He's the greatest

0:00:10 > 0:00:11# He's fantastic

0:00:11 > 0:00:14# Wherever there is danger he'll be there

0:00:14 > 0:00:17# He's the ace, he's amazing

0:00:17 > 0:00:21# He's the strongest he's the quickest, he's the best

0:00:21 > 0:00:24# Danger Mouse

0:00:24 > 0:00:27# Danger Mouse

0:00:27 > 0:00:31# Danger Mouse. #

0:00:38 > 0:00:43Night, and our hero faces that most terrifying of creatures,

0:00:43 > 0:00:45more deadly than the fearsome werewolf.

0:00:45 > 0:00:47Behold!

0:00:48 > 0:00:51The werehouse.

0:00:51 > 0:00:54Your battle banter needs work. How about, "Hi, honey, I'm a home"?

0:00:54 > 0:00:57HOUSE GROWLS

0:00:59 > 0:01:01Prepare for demolition.

0:01:01 > 0:01:04WEAPON DOESN'T RESPOND Hmm.

0:01:04 > 0:01:06HOUSE GROWLS

0:01:16 > 0:01:18End programme.

0:01:18 > 0:01:21That gadget of yours was a bit disappointing, Professor.

0:01:21 > 0:01:23If I'd wanted you to throw something at the window,

0:01:23 > 0:01:26I'd have given you a brick. Reset programme. Begin.

0:01:27 > 0:01:30- Behold, the were... - Blah, blah, blah.

0:01:30 > 0:01:33- Honey, I'm a home.- Genius.

0:01:39 > 0:01:41It happened again, didn't it?

0:01:41 > 0:01:44When will I be free of this terrible curse?

0:01:44 > 0:01:49It's just a training routine, don't build up your part. End programme.

0:01:49 > 0:01:52And that's how you use a synaptic devolver.

0:01:52 > 0:01:54Professor, your mum's at the door.

0:01:54 > 0:01:56My mum? What's she doing here?

0:01:56 > 0:01:59You've got a mother? I assumed you were grown in a lab.

0:01:59 > 0:02:00I've got to see this.

0:02:00 > 0:02:03Danger Mouse, come back.

0:02:03 > 0:02:06- Ah, Pinhead.- Penfold!

0:02:06 > 0:02:10Well, if you say so. There's a huge rubbish monster loose in London.

0:02:10 > 0:02:13- It's absorbing all the trash. - I'll call Danger Mouse.- Why?

0:02:13 > 0:02:15It's doing a wonderful job.

0:02:15 > 0:02:18I just called to tell you to put the bins out.

0:02:21 > 0:02:23Danger Mouse...

0:02:35 > 0:02:37FLIES BUZZ

0:02:37 > 0:02:38Ee! Pfft!

0:02:47 > 0:02:50I'd be very grateful if you'd listen for just a second.

0:02:53 > 0:02:56My mother is one of the two greatest scientists in the world.

0:02:56 > 0:02:58HE GRUMBLES

0:02:58 > 0:03:02Since you ask, the other is my dad, inventor of the Swiss Army sock.

0:03:02 > 0:03:05Now my left sock is currently on the helicopter-rotor tool

0:03:05 > 0:03:07and if I press this dot,

0:03:07 > 0:03:09it activates the instant-bonfire tool.

0:03:09 > 0:03:11Ow, ow! Inside out!

0:03:11 > 0:03:14I'd appreciate it if, while my mum's here,

0:03:14 > 0:03:18you didn't embarrass me by cracking silly jokes, breaking my stuff

0:03:18 > 0:03:21or generally behaving like a caveman with a badge. OK?

0:03:21 > 0:03:22Thank you so much.

0:03:25 > 0:03:28Hi, Mum, welcome to my lab. I've been wanting to show you around...

0:03:28 > 0:03:31Hi, hi, sorry to call round like this,

0:03:31 > 0:03:34- I was hoping to meet Danger Mouse. - Yeah?

0:03:38 > 0:03:39Mum?

0:03:47 > 0:03:50He's quite dashing, isn't he?

0:03:50 > 0:03:53Yes, well, actually, I actually invented the drop cable.

0:03:53 > 0:03:55MONSTER GROWLS

0:03:55 > 0:03:58Sorry to interrupt, but this thing means business.

0:03:59 > 0:04:00To the car.

0:04:13 > 0:04:16Shouldn't we be finding out where this monster came from,

0:04:16 > 0:04:18not just running away from it?

0:04:18 > 0:04:20Shush, dear, Danger Mouse has to concentrate.

0:04:20 > 0:04:22Thanks, Mrs S. May I call you Mrs S?

0:04:25 > 0:04:28Erm, chief,

0:04:28 > 0:04:31why don't you try battling the monster with some of the Professor's

0:04:31 > 0:04:33amazing gadgets?

0:04:33 > 0:04:34You know, in front of her mum?

0:04:34 > 0:04:36Because they're normally overcomplicated

0:04:36 > 0:04:38and get broken easily.

0:04:38 > 0:04:40- Ugh...- Oh, I see,

0:04:40 > 0:04:42Right, watch this, Mrs S.

0:04:42 > 0:04:45Your daughter's liquefying rockets are about to save the day.

0:04:45 > 0:04:47Eh?

0:04:57 > 0:05:00Ah! To fire forwards, you push the lever forwards.

0:05:00 > 0:05:03To fire backwards, you pull the lever backwards.

0:05:03 > 0:05:05Did you have to make the system so complicated?

0:05:05 > 0:05:09- You have to remember, he's not as clever as us.- Exactly.

0:05:11 > 0:05:13PENFOLD COUGHS

0:05:13 > 0:05:14Something stinks.

0:05:14 > 0:05:18Of course! It's a build-up of methane gas from the trash.

0:05:18 > 0:05:20- Out of the way, Mouse. - I didn't even know it did that.

0:05:20 > 0:05:23Of course you wouldn't, it's in the instructions.

0:05:30 > 0:05:33Watch this, Mum, pure science.

0:05:33 > 0:05:36Massive methane monster plus spark equals...

0:05:36 > 0:05:39- Activate danger pogo.- No!

0:05:46 > 0:05:48Just another day at the office.

0:05:48 > 0:05:50Professor, what were you doing?

0:05:50 > 0:05:54- You could have hurt him.- Your mum calls you Professor?- It's my name.

0:05:54 > 0:05:57So you're Professor Professor Squawkencluck?

0:05:57 > 0:06:00Get over it. Hang on, why were you worried I'd hurt him?

0:06:00 > 0:06:02Yeah, that was silly of me,

0:06:02 > 0:06:06you can't destroy a DNA-level genetic monster with a spark.

0:06:06 > 0:06:07You seem to know a lot about it.

0:06:13 > 0:06:16- Mum, where's Dad?- Professor, you know how messy he can be.

0:06:16 > 0:06:20So I thought, why not change his DNA so he takes his mess with him?

0:06:21 > 0:06:23Dad?

0:06:23 > 0:06:25No time for family reunions, he looks hungry.

0:06:25 > 0:06:27I can see the resemblance, by the way.

0:06:35 > 0:06:38- What's he looking for?- Me. He thinks I can turn him back.

0:06:38 > 0:06:39But I don't know how.

0:06:39 > 0:06:42Well, he'll never find the car amongst all these others.

0:06:42 > 0:06:44Ah...

0:06:50 > 0:06:53You came to visit so Danger Mouse would protect you.

0:06:53 > 0:06:55You weren't there to see me at all.

0:06:55 > 0:06:58Well, at least I didn't blow up your father.

0:06:58 > 0:07:02- Families, they're all the same. - So, come on, let's turn him back.

0:07:02 > 0:07:06- I told you, I don't know how.- I was talking to Professor Professor.

0:07:06 > 0:07:09- She knows how. - I do?- Your werewolf weapon.

0:07:09 > 0:07:12I mean, what is your dad if he's not a were-rubish-heap?

0:07:12 > 0:07:13The synaptic devolver...

0:07:13 > 0:07:15was destroyed along with HQ.

0:07:15 > 0:07:17Oh, we could use my lab to make another.

0:07:17 > 0:07:20Right, you go and make a snow-ape-trick revolver,

0:07:20 > 0:07:23Penfold and I will stall Mr Squawkenmonster.

0:07:23 > 0:07:24Eek!

0:07:24 > 0:07:26Don't worry, Penfold, I've got everything

0:07:26 > 0:07:29we need to distract it apart from one small thing.

0:07:29 > 0:07:32- What's that?- A plan.

0:07:33 > 0:07:35I like what you've done with the living room.

0:07:35 > 0:07:37Well, we like it to feel homely.

0:07:37 > 0:07:40SCREAMING

0:07:40 > 0:07:42- We need to work fast. - Just tell me what to do.

0:07:50 > 0:07:53Brilliant, dear, all we need now is months of testing and peer review.

0:07:53 > 0:07:55MONSTER APPROACHES

0:07:55 > 0:07:57You're home early.

0:07:57 > 0:08:01- We threw everything we had at him. - And it's just made him bigger!

0:08:01 > 0:08:04Danger Mouse, quick, you've got to get into the monster's stomach.

0:08:04 > 0:08:06Piece of cake, Professor.

0:08:06 > 0:08:09If you breathe in the pure methane stomach gas, you'll explode.

0:08:09 > 0:08:11OK, so a massively deadly piece of cake.

0:08:11 > 0:08:13I'll have a slice of that.

0:08:17 > 0:08:19Over here.

0:08:21 > 0:08:24ROMANTIC PIANO MUSIC PLAYS

0:08:26 > 0:08:28Now.

0:08:47 > 0:08:50Remember, keep the gas mask on.

0:09:18 > 0:09:19Come on, Danger Mouse.

0:09:31 > 0:09:34- SYNAPTIC DEVOLVER BEEPS - Oo?

0:09:36 > 0:09:39Some of it went in my mouth!

0:09:39 > 0:09:41HE BREATHES DEEPLY

0:09:41 > 0:09:42You did it!

0:09:42 > 0:09:45But where's, er...?

0:09:45 > 0:09:49- Dad. - Professor, what a lovely surprise.

0:09:51 > 0:09:54There you are, I've been looking for you.

0:09:54 > 0:09:57Oh, I'll never try and change you again.

0:09:57 > 0:09:59Although it did occur to me that if I made you

0:09:59 > 0:10:01- and your mess invisible... - Fascinating,

0:10:01 > 0:10:04do you think a chameleon gene introduced via...

0:10:04 > 0:10:06Mum, Dad...

0:10:06 > 0:10:08THEY LAUGH

0:10:08 > 0:10:11Come on, let's all go for lunch and discuss quantum realities

0:10:11 > 0:10:13just like you we did when you were a baby.

0:10:13 > 0:10:15You go ahead without us but, before you do,

0:10:15 > 0:10:17I took the liberty of taking this during the battle.

0:10:17 > 0:10:19Eye patch, print photo.

0:10:21 > 0:10:23A monster of a family photo, chief.

0:10:25 > 0:10:29- It's a matter of urgency, DM. - Of course, sir. What's the mission?

0:10:29 > 0:10:31Clean up the mess.

0:10:31 > 0:10:33- PENFOLD:- No!

0:10:33 > 0:10:36And so our adventure comes to an end but what have we learned?

0:10:36 > 0:10:39You can choose your friends but you can't choose your monsters?

0:10:39 > 0:10:41Charity begins in the lab?

0:10:41 > 0:10:43Families are all relative?

0:10:43 > 0:10:45Or, more likely, have we learned nothing at all?

0:10:47 > 0:10:49# He's the greatest

0:10:49 > 0:10:51# He's fantastic

0:10:51 > 0:10:53# Wherever there is danger he'll be there

0:10:53 > 0:10:56# Danger Mouse

0:10:56 > 0:10:59# Danger Mouse

0:10:59 > 0:11:03# Danger Mouse. #