0:00:08 > 0:00:11# He's the greatest He's fantastic
0:00:11 > 0:00:14# Wherever there is danger He'll be there
0:00:14 > 0:00:17# He's the ace He's amazing
0:00:17 > 0:00:21# He's the strongest He's the quickest, he's the best
0:00:21 > 0:00:23# Danger Mouse
0:00:24 > 0:00:27# Danger Mouse
0:00:27 > 0:00:31# Danger Mouse! #
0:00:38 > 0:00:42'Cower, ye mortals, for deep in the dark bowels of the Earth,
0:00:42 > 0:00:46'Danger Mouse and Penfold face an ancient nightmare -
0:00:46 > 0:00:48'a mighty dragon so terrible that...'
0:00:48 > 0:00:50You're not helping.
0:00:50 > 0:00:52'Sorry. Forget I said anything.'
0:00:52 > 0:00:53DRAGON ROARS
0:00:53 > 0:00:56SKELETON SQUEALS
0:00:56 > 0:01:01Be brave, Penfold. Together, we can defeat this massive, terrifying...
0:01:01 > 0:01:02LOW SQUEAK
0:01:02 > 0:01:05- ..ant.- Look out, Chief! A mighty dragon!
0:01:05 > 0:01:07- Pause programme. - BEEP
0:01:07 > 0:01:09Penfold, how can I teach you to be a hero
0:01:09 > 0:01:10if you keep re-programming the simulator?
0:01:10 > 0:01:13Don't you want to be like me and face doom every day?
0:01:13 > 0:01:16I'd rather have my favourite tie set on fire.
0:01:16 > 0:01:17Agh!
0:01:17 > 0:01:20It's fine. That was my second favourite.
0:01:20 > 0:01:21ALARM BLARES
0:01:21 > 0:01:25Disaster, DM! Just received this footage from Cambodia.
0:01:25 > 0:01:28'80s SYNTH MUSIC
0:01:28 > 0:01:30Um... Not that footage. Ha-ha!
0:01:30 > 0:01:33I thought I marked that "top-secret".
0:01:33 > 0:01:36This footage, of an alien invasion.
0:01:36 > 0:01:38Oh, man! They destroyed Angkor Wat!
0:01:40 > 0:01:43The aliens have already attacked Mount Rushmore...
0:01:44 > 0:01:46Finally, some peace and quiet.
0:01:46 > 0:01:48- ..Notre Dame... - BELL TOLLS
0:01:48 > 0:01:49- BELL CLANGS - Oof!
0:01:49 > 0:01:51..and worst of all, here in London,
0:01:51 > 0:01:55the greatest achievement this country has to offer the world -
0:01:55 > 0:01:57Big Mike's Pie Stall!
0:01:57 > 0:01:59The fiends!
0:01:59 > 0:02:01His chicken and probably ham pies are legendary.
0:02:01 > 0:02:03Now the aliens are in the Egypt.
0:02:03 > 0:02:06Danger Mouse, you've got to save the world from destruction.
0:02:06 > 0:02:09You see, Penfold? The world needs heroes, not cowards.
0:02:09 > 0:02:11We're going to Egypt.
0:02:11 > 0:02:13ENGINE REVS AND TYRES SCREECH
0:02:20 > 0:02:22ALIENS CHEER
0:02:22 > 0:02:24Oooh...
0:02:24 > 0:02:26DEVICES POWER UP
0:02:41 > 0:02:43ALIENS GRUMBLE
0:02:43 > 0:02:46Do ye know road for gift shop? We wish buy postcard.
0:02:46 > 0:02:49Postcards? Gift shop?
0:02:49 > 0:02:51- What kind of invasion is this? - NOVELTY CAR HORN HONKS
0:02:51 > 0:02:53ENGINES POWER DOWN
0:02:56 > 0:02:59Five extra wommas for the amazing history of this paradise.
0:02:59 > 0:03:01- Oh, what a dump. No refunds. - The Sphinx is hollow...
0:03:01 > 0:03:03Blah, blah, blah...
0:03:03 > 0:03:06So when you hold it to your ear, you hear fish playing violins.
0:03:06 > 0:03:08Chief, they're tourists.
0:03:08 > 0:03:11- Hey, no freeloaders! - 30 wommas a day for the tour!
0:03:11 > 0:03:14- Oh, can we, Chief? Can we? - We don't want to join the tour.
0:03:14 > 0:03:17We want your tourists to stop destroying our planet!
0:03:17 > 0:03:20Hey, no-one's destroying nothing. They're taking souvenirs. Look.
0:03:20 > 0:03:21ZAP
0:03:23 > 0:03:24Then, in the name of planet Earth,
0:03:24 > 0:03:27I insist you return everything you took and leave!
0:03:27 > 0:03:30Hey, this guy is King of Mars. Who wants to buy a picture?
0:03:30 > 0:03:33- Penfold, look out - camera. - Cheese...
0:03:34 > 0:03:36Right, no more Mr Nice Mouse.
0:03:36 > 0:03:38Uh?
0:03:38 > 0:03:40RUBBERY THUMPS
0:03:40 > 0:03:44CIRCUS MUSIC PLAYS
0:03:49 > 0:03:50Probably the other button.
0:03:50 > 0:03:52ZAP
0:03:58 > 0:04:00PENFOLD SCREAMS
0:04:00 > 0:04:01- Oof!- What a show!
0:04:01 > 0:04:04I can make you an intergalactic superstar.
0:04:04 > 0:04:08- Make me rich...- Smile, Quark.
0:04:08 > 0:04:09HORN HONKS
0:04:09 > 0:04:10BUTTON BEEPS
0:04:13 > 0:04:16'And so, with the world saved and the show ending early,
0:04:16 > 0:04:19'what will Danger Mouse do with his time off?
0:04:19 > 0:04:20'Will he wash the Danger Car?
0:04:20 > 0:04:22'Will he visit his mother, like he said he would?
0:04:22 > 0:04:25'Will he spot the giant alien eye watching him through the window?'
0:04:25 > 0:04:27Agh! Look out, chief!
0:04:27 > 0:04:28'An alien eye?!'
0:04:31 > 0:04:34That's it! An Englishman's postbox is his castle.
0:04:37 > 0:04:39SAVAGE BEATINGS
0:04:42 > 0:04:44Er... Chief?
0:04:44 > 0:04:47TOURISTS CHANT: Danger Mouse! Danger Mouse!
0:04:47 > 0:04:50OK, Danger fans - next show is in 15.
0:04:50 > 0:04:53Wave at the easy money, mouse brain.
0:04:53 > 0:04:56TOURISTS CLAMOUR
0:04:56 > 0:04:58You're a star - a bona fide tourist attraction.
0:04:58 > 0:05:01- Hey, how about some autographs? - They love that garbage.
0:05:01 > 0:05:03ALL CLAMOUR
0:05:03 > 0:05:04Chief, I think this is a trick.
0:05:04 > 0:05:06Don't be silly, Penfold.
0:05:06 > 0:05:09I don't mind a few autographs, but...no photos(!)
0:05:09 > 0:05:11LAUGHTER
0:05:11 > 0:05:12PEN CLICKS
0:05:12 > 0:05:15- Who's it to? - ALIEN WIBBLES
0:05:15 > 0:05:17- Spelt the way it sounds? - GIGGLES
0:05:17 > 0:05:20Stick with me, superstar. I got big plans.
0:05:20 > 0:05:23- Chief? Where are you going? - TOURISTS: Danger Mouse! Danger Mouse!
0:05:23 > 0:05:25Oh, crumbs!
0:05:25 > 0:05:29Come to Earth and see the 412th wonder of the universe -
0:05:29 > 0:05:30Danger Mouse!
0:05:30 > 0:05:34He's 100 metres tall, he can eat 100 hot dogs in one second...
0:05:34 > 0:05:37- Real dogs.- Gross.
0:05:37 > 0:05:40Book now for the Danger Show Extravaganza!
0:05:40 > 0:05:41No refunds.
0:05:45 > 0:05:47Danger Mouse, the world needs you!
0:05:47 > 0:05:50- Oh, sorry. Wrong number. - It's me, Colonel.
0:05:50 > 0:05:52Where's DM? The world's ending!
0:05:52 > 0:05:54We're relying on you to find him -
0:05:54 > 0:05:56and then, we're relying on him.
0:05:56 > 0:05:59Oh, crikey! Is there a plan B?
0:06:01 > 0:06:04CROWD CLAMOURS: Danger Mouse!
0:06:04 > 0:06:06- Ha! You think that's amazing? - APPLAUSE
0:06:06 > 0:06:07Watch this.
0:06:07 > 0:06:09- VROOM - Agh!
0:06:09 > 0:06:12Couldn't this have waited? I'm a busy galactic star now, you know?
0:06:12 > 0:06:14Chief, Quark's turned the whole planet
0:06:14 > 0:06:16into a Danger Mouse theme park!
0:06:16 > 0:06:18An ice sculpture? Cool - literally.
0:06:18 > 0:06:21He's used the entire polar ice caps to make it.
0:06:21 > 0:06:23Where are the bears supposed to live?
0:06:24 > 0:06:26POLAR BEAR GRUNTS
0:06:26 > 0:06:29He's turned Europe into a Danger Coaster!
0:06:31 > 0:06:32- Brilliant.- Brilliant?
0:06:32 > 0:06:34Thanks to your popularity,
0:06:34 > 0:06:36they've even turned the Moon into a car park.
0:06:36 > 0:06:38SPACESHIP HORNS BEEP
0:06:38 > 0:06:40CLUNK
0:06:40 > 0:06:42- And it's not just the Moon. - CHEERING
0:06:42 > 0:06:43Look!
0:06:46 > 0:06:50Yeah. Perhaps there might be a slight issue. I'll speak to Quark.
0:06:52 > 0:06:55CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:06:55 > 0:06:57- Here he is...- Late.- Number one in
0:06:57 > 0:07:01100 Things To See Before You Evolve Into A Snarpusian Swamp Rat...
0:07:01 > 0:07:04Quark, I think we're going to have to call all of this off.
0:07:04 > 0:07:07Then who will save the planet from the Laverian Lick Monster?
0:07:07 > 0:07:09MONSTER PURRS
0:07:09 > 0:07:10Aw, he doesn't look a prob...
0:07:10 > 0:07:12- Agh! Steady on!- Blech!
0:07:14 > 0:07:16- Ha! - CHEERING
0:07:16 > 0:07:17Oh!
0:07:18 > 0:07:21Nobody licks Her Majesty without royal approval!
0:07:28 > 0:07:30CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:07:30 > 0:07:33Now, that's what I call tongue-tied. The show's over, Quark.
0:07:33 > 0:07:36- Sure, sure. The show's over(!)- Not!
0:07:36 > 0:07:38Complain all you like, I'll just release another monster
0:07:38 > 0:07:40and you'll have to put on a show.
0:07:40 > 0:07:42CHANTS: Danger Mouse, Danger Mouse!
0:07:42 > 0:07:44What do I do? I can't let monsters loose on the planet,
0:07:44 > 0:07:47but if I fight, then it'll attract more tourists.
0:07:47 > 0:07:50Chief, the only way to get rid of the fans is to stop performing.
0:07:50 > 0:07:52- PENFOLD GASPS - I've got an idea.
0:07:52 > 0:07:55Next up, a battle royale - Danger Mouse versus...
0:07:55 > 0:07:59Quark, Danger Mouse challenges you to a battle instead.
0:07:59 > 0:08:02What are you, crazy? No-one will pay to see that.
0:08:02 > 0:08:06Hi, Danger fans. It's me against the guy who taught me everything -
0:08:06 > 0:08:09Goliath's BIG BROTHER, Quark the Magnificent!
0:08:09 > 0:08:11CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:08:11 > 0:08:14You've already sold a million tickets.
0:08:14 > 0:08:17Still, I guess we could give the money back...
0:08:17 > 0:08:19- No refunds!- Fine, whatever.
0:08:19 > 0:08:21It'll only take him 20 seconds to beat me.
0:08:21 > 0:08:23The crowd will love it. Easy money.
0:08:23 > 0:08:25Chief, if we're going to pull this off,
0:08:25 > 0:08:29you've got put on the most cowardly performance of your life.
0:08:29 > 0:08:31"Cowardly"? Cow-ard-ly? Cow-ard-lay?
0:08:31 > 0:08:33Are you sure that's a word?
0:08:33 > 0:08:34Here, do it like me.
0:08:34 > 0:08:36PENFOLD WHIMPERS
0:08:36 > 0:08:38DANGER MOUSE WHIMPERS
0:08:38 > 0:08:39No, like this!
0:08:39 > 0:08:41PENFOLD SCREAMS
0:08:41 > 0:08:43It looks so right when you do it. I'll do my best.
0:08:43 > 0:08:46No, Chief - do your worst.
0:08:50 > 0:08:51Ahem...
0:08:51 > 0:08:53PENFOLD WHIMPERS
0:08:54 > 0:08:55DANGER MOUSE WHIMPERS
0:08:55 > 0:08:57APPLAUSE FALTERS
0:08:57 > 0:09:00Come on, let's give them a show!
0:09:00 > 0:09:02Ahem?
0:09:05 > 0:09:06Ugh...
0:09:13 > 0:09:15Whoohoo! Yeah, great acting, hero. Now, fight back.
0:09:15 > 0:09:17DANGER MOUSE GROANS
0:09:17 > 0:09:19Pwease don't hurt me...
0:09:19 > 0:09:22Hey, be a hero, Danger Putz! BOOING
0:09:24 > 0:09:27Help, help - I'm so scared!
0:09:27 > 0:09:30Stop it! You'll have to fight back eventually.
0:09:34 > 0:09:35Whee!
0:09:36 > 0:09:38I mean... Aghh!
0:09:41 > 0:09:43CROWD GASPS
0:09:43 > 0:09:46Still not fighting back? Fine.
0:09:46 > 0:09:48SCREWS SQUEAK LOOSE
0:09:48 > 0:09:50- LONDON EYE CREAKS - Agh!
0:09:51 > 0:09:53This must be what it feels like to be you.
0:09:53 > 0:09:56CLANG
0:09:56 > 0:09:59I can't take any more! You win.
0:09:59 > 0:10:02O-ho! You win! You're the star!
0:10:02 > 0:10:04Not any more...
0:10:04 > 0:10:06CHANTING: Quark, Quark, Quark!
0:10:06 > 0:10:08The biggest attraction in the galaxy!
0:10:08 > 0:10:10The conqueror of Danger Mouse!
0:10:10 > 0:10:14- Get your Quark goodies here! - And don't forget to take a photo!
0:10:14 > 0:10:15TOURISTS CLAMOUR
0:10:20 > 0:10:21Looks like you were right, Penfold -
0:10:21 > 0:10:23the world does need cowards after all.
0:10:23 > 0:10:28Of course it does, Chief. If it wasn't for us, who would you rescue?
0:10:28 > 0:10:31Here, someone's taken the car as a souvenir.
0:10:31 > 0:10:33- How are we going to get home?- Hmm...
0:10:33 > 0:10:34PENFOLD SCREAMS
0:10:34 > 0:10:36'And so, for once, Danger Mouse's heroism
0:10:36 > 0:10:39'nearly brings about the destruction of the planet
0:10:39 > 0:10:40'and cowardice saves the day.
0:10:40 > 0:10:42'Danger Mouse will be appearing
0:10:42 > 0:10:44'at the next International Coward's Convention,
0:10:44 > 0:10:47'where he'll be signing autographs - if anyone's brave enough to ask!'
0:10:50 > 0:10:53# He's the greatest, he's fantastic
0:10:53 > 0:10:55# Wherever there is danger He'll be there
0:10:55 > 0:10:57# Danger Mouse
0:10:58 > 0:11:00# Danger Mouse
0:11:01 > 0:11:05# Danger Mouse! #