Squawkenbard Kingcluck Brunel

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0:00:05 > 0:00:06Chief!

0:00:08 > 0:00:11# He's the greatest, he's fantastic

0:00:11 > 0:00:14# Wherever there is danger He'll be there

0:00:14 > 0:00:15# He's the ace The ace

0:00:15 > 0:00:17# He's amazing Amazing

0:00:17 > 0:00:21# He's the strongest He's the quickest, he's the best

0:00:21 > 0:00:24# Danger Mouse

0:00:24 > 0:00:27# Danger Mouse

0:00:27 > 0:00:31# Danger Mouse! #

0:00:38 > 0:00:40NARRATOR: Day one of the annual Brainiacs' Symposium,

0:00:40 > 0:00:43and all the world's leading eggheads are here -

0:00:43 > 0:00:45from Professor Jellyfishowitz

0:00:45 > 0:00:48to Isambard King Kong Brunel?

0:00:48 > 0:00:49Shh!

0:00:51 > 0:00:53An abandoned mysterious device!

0:00:53 > 0:00:55This always ends well.

0:00:55 > 0:00:56Taxi!

0:00:59 > 0:01:03Imagine - the world's finest minds competing with their best ideas!

0:01:03 > 0:01:06Yes, what a fantastic opportunity to catch up on sleep.

0:01:06 > 0:01:08I don't expect you to understand.

0:01:08 > 0:01:12The best idea you ever had was to put jam on both sides of the bread.

0:01:12 > 0:01:14To be fair, that was Penfold's idea.

0:01:14 > 0:01:16It's doubly delicious.

0:01:16 > 0:01:19But dropping it is a guaranteed disaster.

0:01:19 > 0:01:20PHONE VIBRATES

0:01:21 > 0:01:25There's a massive amount of energy coming from the conference.

0:01:25 > 0:01:26That doesn't seem likely.

0:01:26 > 0:01:27But I suppose we should check it out.

0:01:27 > 0:01:30- Watch out for the traffic jam. - What traffic j...?

0:01:30 > 0:01:32Aargh!

0:01:36 > 0:01:37Ha!

0:01:37 > 0:01:38Ha!

0:01:38 > 0:01:41We've only got 25 seconds to defuse it!

0:01:41 > 0:01:44So we have 24 seconds spare for a meet and greet.

0:01:46 > 0:01:50It's a milkshake-powered cold fusion detonator.

0:01:50 > 0:01:51Start sucking!

0:01:52 > 0:01:54Gah!

0:01:54 > 0:01:55Brain freeze!

0:01:55 > 0:01:57You suck, Danger Mouse.

0:01:57 > 0:01:58Right now!

0:02:06 > 0:02:08That was close!

0:02:08 > 0:02:09My Little Bang Reactor!

0:02:09 > 0:02:13That would have powered the whole of London for 12 seconds...

0:02:13 > 0:02:14ish.

0:02:14 > 0:02:16You had no limiter.

0:02:16 > 0:02:18A second later it would have destroyed the whole city!

0:02:18 > 0:02:19Ah-ha!

0:02:19 > 0:02:22So you admit it would have worked for 12 seconds!

0:02:22 > 0:02:24What am I supposed to present now?

0:02:24 > 0:02:25Hmm...

0:02:25 > 0:02:27I suppose I still have my cow trainer.

0:02:36 > 0:02:37Voila!

0:02:37 > 0:02:41From inside the cow's mind I can train her to do anything.

0:02:41 > 0:02:44Like calculate the square root of 64.

0:02:47 > 0:02:49With a calculator.

0:02:49 > 0:02:50Moo!

0:02:50 > 0:02:52THEY LAUGH

0:02:54 > 0:02:55BRUNEL WHIMPERS

0:02:59 > 0:03:00COW MOOS

0:03:00 > 0:03:03Maybe if your ideas weren't quite so amazingly terrible,

0:03:03 > 0:03:05people might take you more seriously.

0:03:05 > 0:03:09Maybe if I had a whole agency giving me every electrode I whine for,

0:03:09 > 0:03:11I'd stand a chance!

0:03:11 > 0:03:13WHINING: I don't whine!

0:03:13 > 0:03:16Or maybe, if I worked for Danger Mouse

0:03:16 > 0:03:18people would listen!

0:03:18 > 0:03:20I do not work FOR Danger Mouse.

0:03:20 > 0:03:24My ideas are so good they'd win even if you presented them!

0:03:24 > 0:03:25And I'll prove it.

0:03:31 > 0:03:36Now watch as YOU get a standing ovation for MY ideas.

0:03:38 > 0:03:41Colleagues, today I present the future of...

0:03:41 > 0:03:42Giant hats!

0:03:42 > 0:03:44THEY LAUGH

0:03:44 > 0:03:46No, listen...

0:03:46 > 0:03:49- ALL:- Big hat! Big hat! Big hat!

0:03:49 > 0:03:51Lift back to HQ, Professor?

0:03:51 > 0:03:52What?

0:03:52 > 0:03:53Oh, I'm not...

0:03:55 > 0:03:56..staying.

0:03:56 > 0:04:00Yes, take me back to my amazing lab.

0:04:03 > 0:04:04Brunel?

0:04:04 > 0:04:06Where are you? Brunel?

0:04:06 > 0:04:08- He's lost himself! - THEY LAUGH

0:04:08 > 0:04:09Brilliant!

0:04:10 > 0:04:13This place is amazing.

0:04:13 > 0:04:15But, of course, I already knew that,

0:04:15 > 0:04:18because I am Professor Squawkencluck.

0:04:19 > 0:04:21Careful, that's not a toy!

0:04:21 > 0:04:23It's cherry soda.

0:04:23 > 0:04:25Don't mind if I do.

0:04:25 > 0:04:27Save some for me, chief.

0:04:29 > 0:04:31A highly magnetic cherry soda.

0:04:34 > 0:04:35Ha-ha!

0:04:35 > 0:04:36Chief! You should see...

0:04:36 > 0:04:38Whoa!

0:04:39 > 0:04:40Don't worry.

0:04:40 > 0:04:43I've invented something to avoid the situation.

0:04:43 > 0:04:44Behold!

0:04:44 > 0:04:47A bigger refrigerator!

0:04:49 > 0:04:53Fortunately, I've also invented anti-magnetic limeade.

0:04:57 > 0:04:59Voila!

0:04:59 > 0:05:00Are you all right, Professor?

0:05:00 > 0:05:02You're acting very...

0:05:02 > 0:05:03..well, relaxed.

0:05:03 > 0:05:05And your voice is completely different.

0:05:05 > 0:05:07I have a cold.

0:05:07 > 0:05:08Congratulations, Professor.

0:05:08 > 0:05:11The convention's top prize will be yours again for sure.

0:05:11 > 0:05:14Really? You like my inventions?

0:05:14 > 0:05:16Oh, that makes me so happy!

0:05:16 > 0:05:18Which one should I show?

0:05:18 > 0:05:21I was thinking my nuclear toilet paper.

0:05:21 > 0:05:23That sounds a bit dangerous.

0:05:23 > 0:05:24Maybe keep that one in your

0:05:24 > 0:05:26carbontanium Danger Mouse-free storage chamber.

0:05:29 > 0:05:31Oh, honestly, I don't know why you won't let me in there!

0:05:31 > 0:05:34Just because they're all potential doomsday devices

0:05:34 > 0:05:37and there's an "83% chance" I'd destroy the planet.

0:05:47 > 0:05:48- COMPUTER:- Retina unidentified.

0:05:48 > 0:05:49- Go away.- Grr!

0:05:51 > 0:05:54Squawkencluck requesting entry.

0:05:54 > 0:05:56Hello?

0:05:56 > 0:05:57Danger Mouse!

0:05:57 > 0:05:59Penfold!

0:05:59 > 0:06:01Chief, a big hat wants to come in.

0:06:01 > 0:06:02Sorry, Brunel.

0:06:02 > 0:06:04No dice.

0:06:04 > 0:06:05Let...me...in.

0:06:05 > 0:06:07It's...me,

0:06:07 > 0:06:08Squawk...encluck!

0:06:08 > 0:06:09Nice one, Brunel.

0:06:09 > 0:06:10But if you're Squawky,

0:06:10 > 0:06:12then who's that?

0:06:12 > 0:06:13Oh, Danger Mouse!

0:06:13 > 0:06:14SHE GASPS

0:06:14 > 0:06:17Remind me which is my carbontanium storage chamber,

0:06:17 > 0:06:20and I'll let you play with whatever's inside.

0:06:20 > 0:06:21Third from the left.

0:06:21 > 0:06:24# I get to play with your stuff! #

0:06:24 > 0:06:25Danger Mouse, don't go in there!

0:06:25 > 0:06:26Oh, you imbecile!

0:06:26 > 0:06:29You'll...You'll treat them like toys and destroy the planet!

0:06:29 > 0:06:31You suck, Danger Mouse!

0:06:31 > 0:06:32Huh?

0:06:32 > 0:06:35I'd recognise that yelling anywhere.

0:06:35 > 0:06:37But if that's the Professor,

0:06:37 > 0:06:38then who's that?

0:06:40 > 0:06:42Danger Mouse!

0:06:42 > 0:06:43Eek!

0:06:45 > 0:06:47THEY ALL GASP

0:06:47 > 0:06:48I call this

0:06:48 > 0:06:52the Really, Really Massive Little Bang Machine.

0:06:52 > 0:06:53Stop right there, Brunel.

0:06:53 > 0:06:54Huh!

0:07:00 > 0:07:02Sorry, chief.

0:07:02 > 0:07:04I think I've bruised your bottom.

0:07:04 > 0:07:05Leave it to me, Penfold.

0:07:05 > 0:07:06Huh! Ha! Hng...

0:07:09 > 0:07:10HE PANTS

0:07:12 > 0:07:14Have you considered Zumba classes?

0:07:14 > 0:07:17Or, you know, exercise of any kind?

0:07:17 > 0:07:18At all?

0:07:18 > 0:07:20Thanks for the equipment, Professor.

0:07:20 > 0:07:24Now I can finally prove I am the greatest inventor!

0:07:24 > 0:07:29With a machine that powers the whole world for 12 seconds...

0:07:29 > 0:07:31- ish.- Huh?

0:07:31 > 0:07:34Activate rockets in three, two...

0:07:34 > 0:07:35Aargh!

0:07:39 > 0:07:41His calculations are wrong. Again!

0:07:41 > 0:07:44He's going to destroy the world in 13 seconds...ish.

0:07:44 > 0:07:46But surely the scientists will stop him?

0:07:46 > 0:07:48I mean, he's King Kong Brunel!

0:07:48 > 0:07:50But they think he's me!

0:07:50 > 0:07:53NARRATOR: Is it too late for Danger Mouse to save the world?

0:07:53 > 0:07:54And, more importantly,

0:07:54 > 0:07:58is it too late for Danger Mouse to work on Penfold's hamstrings?

0:07:58 > 0:08:00- SNAP! - Ow! Cramp...

0:08:00 > 0:08:01Cramp!

0:08:04 > 0:08:07Ladies and gentlemen,

0:08:07 > 0:08:12my Really, Really Massive Little Bang Machine!

0:08:15 > 0:08:18It looks like it's going dangerously wrong!

0:08:18 > 0:08:20But we know that could never happen with Squawkencluck.

0:08:22 > 0:08:24Um...I don't know how to stop it!

0:08:24 > 0:08:27And I think it's going to blow!

0:08:27 > 0:08:29SCIENTISTS SCREAM

0:08:33 > 0:08:35I know how to stop it!

0:08:35 > 0:08:37Why should we listen to a talking hat?

0:08:37 > 0:08:39Because you should listen to everybody,

0:08:39 > 0:08:41and judge them on the quality of their ideas.

0:08:44 > 0:08:46Brunel, where's the timer?

0:08:46 > 0:08:49I put it inside to stop anyone turning it off.

0:08:51 > 0:08:53Luckily, I'm small enough to get in there.

0:08:53 > 0:08:54I mean, you are.

0:08:54 > 0:08:57And so is Danger Mouse.

0:08:57 > 0:08:58They've all flipped!

0:08:58 > 0:09:01SCIENTISTS SCREAM

0:09:02 > 0:09:03We're going in.

0:09:06 > 0:09:08Danger Mouse, is that...?

0:09:08 > 0:09:09Jam?

0:09:09 > 0:09:11I believe so, Professor.

0:09:11 > 0:09:13This is no silly little milkshake bomb.

0:09:13 > 0:09:15It's a jam-powered nuclear reactor.

0:09:15 > 0:09:16We're doomed.

0:09:16 > 0:09:18No-one can eat that much jam.

0:09:18 > 0:09:20You forget, Professor,

0:09:20 > 0:09:22we have with us the world's number one jam disposal device.

0:09:22 > 0:09:25Me. Er, him. This.

0:09:25 > 0:09:26Shovel the jam in, Professor,

0:09:26 > 0:09:28like the world depended on it.

0:09:28 > 0:09:29Because it does!

0:09:40 > 0:09:43Did they save the world?

0:09:43 > 0:09:44No, Penfold.

0:09:44 > 0:09:46You did.

0:09:46 > 0:09:48BURP ECHOES

0:09:48 > 0:09:49Yay!

0:09:49 > 0:09:50The world is safe!

0:09:50 > 0:09:52Whoop, whoop!

0:09:52 > 0:09:53It's almost not worth mentioning

0:09:53 > 0:09:56how it got endangered in the first place.

0:09:56 > 0:09:58Brunel, you were right.

0:09:58 > 0:10:01When I was you, no-one would even give me a chance.

0:10:01 > 0:10:03It's nice of you to say.

0:10:03 > 0:10:06But maybe I should give up on ever getting the recognition of my peers.

0:10:06 > 0:10:09Maybe it's time for me to become a better person.

0:10:09 > 0:10:12Brunel, I can't believe I'm saying this,

0:10:12 > 0:10:14but you saved the day!

0:10:14 > 0:10:18The symposium's grand prize is yours!

0:10:22 > 0:10:23Mine!

0:10:23 > 0:10:25What?!

0:10:25 > 0:10:26Now I'm an award winner,

0:10:26 > 0:10:29everyone will want to see my new invention.

0:10:30 > 0:10:32The world's first sustainable

0:10:32 > 0:10:34meat fusion reactor!

0:10:37 > 0:10:38Uh-oh...

0:10:38 > 0:10:41SCIENTISTS SCREAM

0:10:41 > 0:10:43Looks like steak for lunch, Danger Mouse.

0:10:43 > 0:10:44Ooh, don't mind if I do.

0:10:44 > 0:10:48NARRATOR: And so ends another episode of Danger Mouse.

0:10:48 > 0:10:50Join... EXPLOSION

0:10:50 > 0:10:53Join us next week for more incredible inventions

0:10:53 > 0:10:57with Isambard King Kong Brunel!

0:10:59 > 0:11:02# He's the greatest, he's fantastic

0:11:02 > 0:11:05# Wherever there is danger He'll be there

0:11:05 > 0:11:08# Danger Mouse

0:11:08 > 0:11:11# Danger Mouse

0:11:11 > 0:11:15# Danger Mouse! #