0:00:26 > 0:00:29At last, I can have some proper food.
0:00:33 > 0:00:35ELECTRICAL CRACKLING
0:00:40 > 0:00:41Hi.
0:00:41 > 0:00:43Get down!
0:00:43 > 0:00:45BANG!
0:00:45 > 0:00:48A microwave? A bit hi-tech for the castle.
0:00:48 > 0:00:50It only just about copes with light bulbs.
0:00:50 > 0:00:53Now how am I going to hot up my Bacon Bap Bonanza?
0:00:53 > 0:00:54- Try frying it?- Good thinking.
0:01:00 > 0:01:03Something smells a little...barn-y.
0:01:03 > 0:01:06Who's Barney? Oh. That'll be these.
0:01:06 > 0:01:08I got a tour of your dad's farm. I loved it.
0:01:08 > 0:01:10The animals were so cute.
0:01:10 > 0:01:15I gave them all names, like Jimbo, Corky and Mr Squeaker.
0:01:16 > 0:01:19Here in the country, we tend not to name the animals.
0:01:19 > 0:01:21It only makes it harder when the time comes
0:01:21 > 0:01:23for their one-way trip.
0:01:23 > 0:01:25Nice. Where to?
0:01:25 > 0:01:28Well, it's a very clean building...
0:01:28 > 0:01:29with tiled floors.
0:01:29 > 0:01:31Oh, I get you. A swimming pool.
0:01:31 > 0:01:36No. The big pigpen in the sky, where the trough's always full.
0:01:36 > 0:01:38Yeah. They do like their grub.
0:01:38 > 0:01:41Right. And so do we.
0:01:41 > 0:01:44Where do you think that bacon bap came from?
0:01:44 > 0:01:45This? The service station.
0:01:45 > 0:01:48Newsflash - it came from a pig.
0:01:48 > 0:01:51I just heard the best gossip at the shops.
0:01:51 > 0:01:53Apparently, there's this Lady Dunraven all the villagers
0:01:53 > 0:01:55think is really stand-offish.
0:01:55 > 0:01:59Never joins in with anything. Oh, people can be so snobby.
0:01:59 > 0:02:01Lady Dunraven, la-di-dah.
0:02:01 > 0:02:04- Probably lives in a big house. - Or a castle, even.
0:02:04 > 0:02:05Yeah, right.
0:02:05 > 0:02:07Newsflash - you're Lady Dunraven.
0:02:07 > 0:02:11A pig? But not like... Not like your dad's?
0:02:11 > 0:02:13- That's what you meant?- Yes. Finally.
0:02:13 > 0:02:16That's it. I'm giving up meat.
0:02:16 > 0:02:18From now I'm going to be a... What do you call it?
0:02:18 > 0:02:20A vegetarian. As of now.
0:02:20 > 0:02:22- Right.- What?
0:02:22 > 0:02:24Your idea of a vegetable is ketchup.
0:02:24 > 0:02:26What do you mean, I'm Lady Dunraven?
0:02:26 > 0:02:28It's the title of the lady of the castle.
0:02:28 > 0:02:31They can't have been talking about me. I'm not stand-offish.
0:02:31 > 0:02:33Well, you didn't go to the cheese rolling.
0:02:33 > 0:02:34Or the well dressing.
0:02:34 > 0:02:37Or the welly wanging.
0:02:37 > 0:02:38Yeah, but I've been really busy.
0:02:47 > 0:02:51OK, so maybe I'm just not into weird local customs.
0:02:51 > 0:02:53But the next thing, I promise I will go to.
0:02:53 > 0:02:56Well, it's the Bogmoor Ball tonight. That's perfect.
0:02:56 > 0:02:59A ball? Tonight? There's a ball tonight?
0:02:59 > 0:03:00I am there.
0:03:00 > 0:03:05Great. Because the lady of the castle opens the dancing.
0:03:05 > 0:03:06Did I say I was there?
0:03:07 > 0:03:10OK, OK, I'm will go to the ball.
0:03:10 > 0:03:13Only if it stops the woman in the shops from selling me mouldy bread.
0:03:13 > 0:03:15You're coming to the ball?
0:03:15 > 0:03:17Awesome. You can see me do my best trick.
0:03:17 > 0:03:21I teleport Benji O'Leary across the stage using two cabinets.
0:03:21 > 0:03:24No-one has ever figured out how I do it.
0:03:24 > 0:03:26Newsflash - everyone knows.
0:03:26 > 0:03:28What? How?
0:03:28 > 0:03:31It doesn't take a genius to figure it out.
0:03:31 > 0:03:34Benji O'Leary has an identical twin.
0:03:34 > 0:03:35Leo puts Benji in one cabinet...
0:03:35 > 0:03:37APPLAUSE
0:03:37 > 0:03:39..and his brother in the other.
0:03:39 > 0:03:44Two twins and two cabinets. It's so obvious.
0:03:44 > 0:03:46My best trick, ruined.
0:03:46 > 0:03:48It's not fair.
0:03:52 > 0:03:54Well, my work here is done.
0:03:57 > 0:03:59Pigs are really cute.
0:04:04 > 0:04:06This pen's a bit over the top, isn't it?
0:04:06 > 0:04:09Not for this one. He'd escape from anywhere.
0:04:09 > 0:04:11- This one's trouble.- Like me.
0:04:11 > 0:04:15Hear that, Mr Squeaker? Don't worry, you'll have a long, happy life.
0:04:15 > 0:04:16Happy, anyways.
0:04:16 > 0:04:18What do you mean?
0:04:18 > 0:04:20Let's just say he's coming to the ball tonight.
0:04:20 > 0:04:22Eh? A dancing pig?
0:04:22 > 0:04:26Not so much as for the dancing as for the eating.
0:04:26 > 0:04:27What?
0:04:28 > 0:04:30Suckling pig roast.
0:04:38 > 0:04:41Well, if I'm going to be opening the dancing, then don't
0:04:41 > 0:04:43I need someone to dance with?
0:04:43 > 0:04:45Kait. Kait!
0:04:45 > 0:04:47Mr McGonnigal dances?
0:04:47 > 0:04:48Who's Mr McGonnigal?
0:04:48 > 0:04:51Kait! And she's gone.
0:04:52 > 0:04:54Then what about me?
0:04:54 > 0:04:55Oh, um, hi, Gabe.
0:04:55 > 0:04:58I'd be honoured to be your partner, my lady.
0:04:58 > 0:04:59I've attended many balls.
0:04:59 > 0:05:02Admittedly, not for a few hundred years.
0:05:02 > 0:05:05Well, what's a couple of centuries between friends? You're on.
0:05:09 > 0:05:11Magic is all about precision.
0:05:11 > 0:05:15I have to stun them tonight. I need a major illusion.
0:05:15 > 0:05:17That you can actually do magic?
0:05:17 > 0:05:20Sorry, that's a major DELUSION.
0:05:20 > 0:05:25Come on, I'm brilliant. Look, I've made this disappearing trick.
0:05:25 > 0:05:30Ladies and gentlemen, I will now cause this plant to disappear.
0:05:31 > 0:05:33Begonia, be gone!
0:05:33 > 0:05:35Uh...
0:05:35 > 0:05:37Magic is all about precision(!)
0:05:40 > 0:05:43ROMANTIC MUSIC PLAYS
0:05:45 > 0:05:47Sorry. I stepped through your toe again.
0:05:47 > 0:05:50Did you? I didn't even notice.
0:05:50 > 0:05:53You're an amazingly fast learner, Lady Dunraven.
0:05:53 > 0:05:56I didn't think I'd be any good but, with you, it's easy.
0:05:58 > 0:05:59And, please, call me Dani.
0:05:59 > 0:06:01You do me much honour.
0:06:02 > 0:06:04RECORD STOPS ABRUPTLY
0:06:04 > 0:06:05Oh, yucketty-yuck, yuck.
0:06:05 > 0:06:07What are you doing here?
0:06:07 > 0:06:08Helping Leo find his magic cape.
0:06:08 > 0:06:11But clearly you two want to make googly eyes at each other.
0:06:11 > 0:06:13I'll leave you two lovebirds alone.
0:06:13 > 0:06:14What? No, wait.
0:06:14 > 0:06:16No, of course not.
0:06:16 > 0:06:21I and Lady Dunraven and I... and I are simply rehearsing.
0:06:21 > 0:06:25For what? Ghost-eo and Juliet?
0:06:25 > 0:06:27The ball.
0:06:27 > 0:06:28I've got to open the dancing
0:06:28 > 0:06:31or I'll for ever be trending in the shop hashtag Miss Snooty.
0:06:31 > 0:06:33Well, you can't dance with him.
0:06:33 > 0:06:35What? He's the only one I can dance with.
0:06:35 > 0:06:37The Bogmoor Ball happens in a marquee.
0:06:37 > 0:06:40Outside the castle?
0:06:40 > 0:06:41Think, Gabe.
0:06:41 > 0:06:42Oh.
0:06:42 > 0:06:44Oh? What, "Oh?"
0:06:44 > 0:06:47Ghosts are trapped in the place they died.
0:06:47 > 0:06:50I can never leave the castle. Nor can Esme.
0:06:50 > 0:06:53Really? But we were doing so well.
0:06:53 > 0:06:55I'm sorry. Forgive me.
0:06:55 > 0:06:58For what? It was fun.
0:06:58 > 0:07:01But that means I still need to find someone to dance with.
0:07:01 > 0:07:04I'm never going to get used to that.
0:07:04 > 0:07:07Or the fact they can't touch the living.
0:07:07 > 0:07:10OK, where is he? We need him for tonight.
0:07:10 > 0:07:11Now hand him over.
0:07:11 > 0:07:15He probably escaped by himself. Mr Squeaker's always escaping.
0:07:15 > 0:07:17And maybe he had good reason.
0:07:17 > 0:07:19Like he didn't feel like being roasted and eaten.
0:07:19 > 0:07:22A-ha! I didn't say which pig, did I?
0:07:22 > 0:07:24You are so guilty.
0:07:24 > 0:07:25Got any proof?
0:07:25 > 0:07:27Trotter prints to the front door.
0:07:27 > 0:07:28Listen to yourself.
0:07:28 > 0:07:32You know, I did hear some funny noises coming from the east wing.
0:07:32 > 0:07:36- Did you?- Yeah, like snorting.
0:07:36 > 0:07:39- What, like...? - SNORT, SNORT!
0:07:39 > 0:07:41I don't know. Do it again.
0:07:41 > 0:07:43SNORT, SNORT!
0:07:43 > 0:07:46A bit lower? SNORT, SNORT!
0:07:46 > 0:07:47Are you winding me up?
0:07:47 > 0:07:51No. Now, excuse me, I've got to get back to veggie tasting.
0:07:52 > 0:07:54Mmm! That is good.
0:07:58 > 0:08:00That, not so much.
0:08:05 > 0:08:07You all right there, mate? SNORTING
0:08:07 > 0:08:09I've got to get you somewhere safe. Come on.
0:08:09 > 0:08:12Ladies and gentlemen, I need a volunteer.
0:08:14 > 0:08:18Thank you, young lady. Now, please, may I have your autograph?
0:08:18 > 0:08:20It's OK, I can do it from here.
0:08:20 > 0:08:24Awesome. That is well cool. OK. Watch closely.
0:08:29 > 0:08:32Ta-da. Now, what is under your seat?
0:08:32 > 0:08:34A chocolate chip muffin?
0:08:34 > 0:08:37A chocolate chip muffin. OK. Break it in half. What's inside?
0:08:38 > 0:08:40Chocolate chips.
0:08:40 > 0:08:45What? It was meant to be the piece of paper with your name on it.
0:08:45 > 0:08:48I'll have to resort to my old stand-by -
0:08:48 > 0:08:51taking my shirt off without removing my jacket.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55It's OK. We've got three hours.
0:08:57 > 0:09:01Ta-da! Major wedgie! Ow!
0:09:01 > 0:09:04I know someone who can help us when the chips are down.
0:09:04 > 0:09:06You can count on your own flesh and blood.
0:09:06 > 0:09:08Sorry to mention flesh.
0:09:09 > 0:09:11A pig? How can you lose a pig? >
0:09:11 > 0:09:14Uh-oh. Pig police are here.
0:09:14 > 0:09:16We'd better get out of here, Mr S.
0:09:17 > 0:09:18Mr S?
0:09:19 > 0:09:21Oh, no. Squeaker escape!
0:09:23 > 0:09:26Look, just keep your eyes open. Jimmy said he heard snorting.
0:09:26 > 0:09:28Snorting? What sort of snorting?
0:09:28 > 0:09:31- PIG SNORTS - Yeah, just like that.
0:09:31 > 0:09:33Aargh!
0:09:33 > 0:09:35Meant that.
0:09:35 > 0:09:38- Jimmy? - Phone call for you in the kitchen.
0:09:38 > 0:09:41Kait, make sure she gets there. Thanks.
0:09:41 > 0:09:43Down the corridor, on the right
0:09:44 > 0:09:46Mr Squeaker!
0:09:48 > 0:09:49Hello? Hello? Hello?
0:09:51 > 0:09:53There's no-one there.
0:09:53 > 0:09:56I can't even get reception on a landline.
0:09:56 > 0:09:57PHONE RINGS
0:10:01 > 0:10:03Hello?
0:10:03 > 0:10:07No, there's no Lady Dunraven here. Oh, no, wait, that's me.
0:10:08 > 0:10:10Oh, Mr McGonnigal.
0:10:10 > 0:10:11Yeah. Kait said you might...
0:10:13 > 0:10:15No, I haven't got a dance partner yet, so if you're free...
0:10:17 > 0:10:19Brilliant. You want to come round and practise?
0:10:19 > 0:10:20OK. Bye.
0:10:23 > 0:10:25OK, so, Gabe can't do it
0:10:25 > 0:10:29but I suppose it is better to have a dance partner who isn't, well, dead.
0:10:31 > 0:10:32Do you want to end up in a bap?
0:10:32 > 0:10:35Is that what you really want? Cos that's what'll happen.
0:10:35 > 0:10:37We have to hide you somewhere fast.
0:10:38 > 0:10:40Ta-da!
0:10:40 > 0:10:43I need you to hide this somewhere.
0:10:43 > 0:10:47You need me to hide a piece of string? OK.
0:10:47 > 0:10:49Oh, not again. Squeaker escape!
0:10:49 > 0:10:51My tricks!
0:10:53 > 0:10:56This box isn't big enough.
0:10:56 > 0:10:58This'll do.
0:10:58 > 0:10:59Come back here. I'm on your side!
0:10:59 > 0:11:01Humans are strange.
0:11:01 > 0:11:03Gotcha. Stop doing that. >
0:11:03 > 0:11:05And he is strange, even for a human.
0:11:06 > 0:11:09- What's in there? - SNORT!
0:11:09 > 0:11:13Whoa! That's my dad's pig. Kait's been looking everywhere for him.
0:11:13 > 0:11:16Ssh! You have to help me hide him.
0:11:16 > 0:11:19No way. I'll get into well big trouble.
0:11:19 > 0:11:21You'll get into trouble? He's going to die.
0:11:21 > 0:11:23Death's not so bad once you get used to it.
0:11:23 > 0:11:26Well, I don't want to be haunted by a pig.
0:11:26 > 0:11:28Look at his face. What do you see?
0:11:28 > 0:11:30Sausages?
0:11:30 > 0:11:33Sorry. Now, if you don't mind, Jimmy,
0:11:33 > 0:11:35I am sort of working on a trick here.
0:11:35 > 0:11:36Can't you just make him disappear?
0:11:36 > 0:11:38No.
0:11:38 > 0:11:41Yes! That's it! He's perfect.
0:11:41 > 0:11:44- He's just what I need. - Need for what?
0:11:44 > 0:11:49I mean, sure, I'll hide him for you. Cos I'm such a nice guy.
0:11:49 > 0:11:51And so very unselfish(!)
0:11:51 > 0:11:53Thanks, Leo. I knew I could count on you, pal.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57What do you think you're doing?
0:11:57 > 0:12:00The Great Vanishing Pig Trick. It will be my finest illusion yet.
0:12:00 > 0:12:02What do you think your dad will do
0:12:02 > 0:12:04when he sees you onstage with his missing pig?
0:12:04 > 0:12:07He'll be totally cool about it.
0:12:07 > 0:12:09Come on, Dad. It was only a pig.
0:12:10 > 0:12:13- He'll kill me, won't he?- Yep.
0:12:13 > 0:12:16No worries. I'll find something else.
0:12:16 > 0:12:19SQUEALING
0:12:19 > 0:12:22BANGING ON DOOR
0:12:30 > 0:12:34Well, so, the new Lady Dunraven.
0:12:34 > 0:12:37I thought you'd be taller.
0:12:37 > 0:12:38Mr McGonnigal?
0:12:38 > 0:12:40Bit hard of hearing.
0:12:40 > 0:12:41Oh. MR MCGONNIGAL?
0:12:41 > 0:12:45Yes. That's me, missy. No need to shout. Shocking manners.
0:12:45 > 0:12:47I hope you'll be able to keep up.
0:12:47 > 0:12:49When I start dancing, I burn the house down.
0:12:58 > 0:13:00Please, make yourself at home(!)
0:13:12 > 0:13:15What will we do with your hair?
0:13:15 > 0:13:19What will I do with MY hair? I haven't really thought about it.
0:13:19 > 0:13:21- What?- I said, I haven't really thought about it!
0:13:22 > 0:13:25Well, I would if I were you.
0:13:25 > 0:13:28And about cultivating a more ladylike tone of voice.
0:13:29 > 0:13:31All ready.
0:13:33 > 0:13:35MUSIC: "Cheek To Cheek" by Irving Berlin
0:13:38 > 0:13:39And...
0:13:39 > 0:13:40# Heaven
0:13:41 > 0:13:43# I'm in heaven
0:13:44 > 0:13:49# And my heart beats so that I can hardly speak
0:13:50 > 0:13:54# And I seem to find the happiness I seek... #
0:13:54 > 0:13:55Oh!
0:13:56 > 0:14:00That's your new partner? I'm a much better dancer than him.
0:14:00 > 0:14:03Well, at least he leave the house.
0:14:03 > 0:14:06- What's he doing?- You're not helping. - What's that?
0:14:06 > 0:14:08You're helping, very much.
0:14:08 > 0:14:11I really must register my strong disapproval.
0:14:11 > 0:14:13So what? That's all you can do.
0:14:13 > 0:14:16Oh, really? I'll show you. The corkscrew twist!
0:14:16 > 0:14:18- Ready?- Not really.
0:14:18 > 0:14:19Oh!
0:14:19 > 0:14:21I said, not really. Whoa!
0:14:25 > 0:14:27This is no time for lazing around.
0:14:27 > 0:14:30You've a lot of work to do unless you want to make me look silly.
0:14:31 > 0:14:33What's the matter?
0:14:33 > 0:14:35You look like you've seen a ghost.
0:14:41 > 0:14:44Ah, Lady Dunraven. How's the ballroom boogie going?
0:14:46 > 0:14:49I'm just rustling up a veggie lunch.
0:14:49 > 0:14:50# I am the spud-meister
0:14:50 > 0:14:54# When do you reckon these'll be done, doll-face? #
0:14:54 > 0:14:57By the looks of it, the 12th of never.
0:14:59 > 0:15:01Eugh, this is so muddy.
0:15:01 > 0:15:04- It must have fallen on the ground. - That's where they're from.
0:15:04 > 0:15:07Have you seriously never been this close to a vegetable before?
0:15:07 > 0:15:09Do gherkins count?
0:15:09 > 0:15:11Please help me, I'm so hungry!
0:15:14 > 0:15:16Oh, that was such a bad mistake!
0:15:19 > 0:15:22Vegetables, give up your secrets!
0:15:22 > 0:15:24Peel them, chop them, boil them. It's called a soup.
0:15:24 > 0:15:25Soup, eh?
0:15:25 > 0:15:28I've heard of that.
0:15:29 > 0:15:30Soup. Soup.
0:15:34 > 0:15:38Perfect. Don't want to overdo it. Pass me that towel.
0:15:41 > 0:15:42Why have you gone invisible?
0:15:42 > 0:15:45I don't want to be seen with someone decorating a pig.
0:15:45 > 0:15:47I'm disguising him. Who'll recognise him now?
0:15:47 > 0:15:49Yes, no-one's seen a muddy pig before(!)
0:15:49 > 0:15:51I'm not finished yet.
0:15:51 > 0:15:54Wow, now he's transformed(!)
0:15:54 > 0:15:55Ladies and gentlemen,
0:15:55 > 0:16:00I will now make a live pig disappear before your very eyes.
0:16:00 > 0:16:02Prepare to be amazed.
0:16:04 > 0:16:07Squeakus Porkus Begonus!
0:16:09 > 0:16:11Wow! It actually worked.
0:16:11 > 0:16:14I hope you're not going to say that on the night.
0:16:14 > 0:16:15I mean, I thank you.
0:16:15 > 0:16:18And now to make him reappear.
0:16:18 > 0:16:21Squeakus Porkus Returnum!
0:16:22 > 0:16:25I'll try that again.
0:16:25 > 0:16:26Returnum!
0:16:28 > 0:16:30The back hatch is broken open.
0:16:30 > 0:16:34- Impossible! No pig could have done that.- This is no ordinary pig.
0:16:34 > 0:16:37- BOTH: Squeaker escape!- We've got to find him. Jimmy'll kill me.
0:16:37 > 0:16:40Not if your sister kills you first. Or your dad!
0:16:40 > 0:16:41Aargh!
0:16:45 > 0:16:47SNORTING AND SNUFFLING
0:16:57 > 0:16:59I can't stop staring at that thing on his head.
0:16:59 > 0:17:01And when he gets back, he's teaching me the tango.
0:17:01 > 0:17:04Truly, ballroom dancing with the wrong partner
0:17:04 > 0:17:05can be a testing experience.
0:17:05 > 0:17:08What if he does it again and I fall in front of everyone?
0:17:08 > 0:17:10There is no way I can do this,
0:17:10 > 0:17:13even if it makes me the most popular person in Bogmoor.
0:17:13 > 0:17:16- Um...- Just tell him I'm busy hoovering the dungeons or something.
0:17:16 > 0:17:20- That is, perhaps, not the best idea. - You've changed your tune.
0:17:20 > 0:17:22I hate to see you dance with that man
0:17:22 > 0:17:25but I do not think you want the villagers taking against you.
0:17:25 > 0:17:28The last time they took against a Lady Dunraven, it did not end well.
0:17:28 > 0:17:30What happened?
0:17:30 > 0:17:32They burnt her as a witch.
0:17:32 > 0:17:34OK, fine.
0:17:34 > 0:17:36And maybe you should start the dance
0:17:36 > 0:17:39before Mr McGonnigal starts on the puddings.
0:17:40 > 0:17:42What? Why?
0:17:42 > 0:17:45Oh, he doesn't overdo it on the sugar, does he?
0:18:06 > 0:18:08Right, he came this way.
0:18:08 > 0:18:10Leo, where's Mr Squeaker?
0:18:10 > 0:18:13- He's...- Squeaker escape?
0:18:13 > 0:18:15- Yeah.- We need to find him before Kaitlin does
0:18:15 > 0:18:17- or he'll end up as crackling. - And so will we.
0:18:17 > 0:18:20OK, OK. What do we have that a pig doesn't?
0:18:20 > 0:18:23Eyebrows!
0:18:23 > 0:18:26Our brains. You search rooms, tombs and ballrooms
0:18:26 > 0:18:28and I'll search halls, walls and ballrooms.
0:18:28 > 0:18:30- Can you say that again?- No!
0:18:35 > 0:18:37Mr Squeaker, what are you doing?
0:18:37 > 0:18:41Those pies are for the ball! How could you?
0:18:41 > 0:18:43They do smell good though.
0:18:43 > 0:18:46Moist, flaky pastry.
0:18:46 > 0:18:48No. I swore I wouldn't.
0:18:48 > 0:18:51At least one of us has principles.
0:18:51 > 0:18:52Jimmy?
0:18:54 > 0:18:59Kaitlin, hey. Nice pig-tail... Hair. Hair.
0:18:59 > 0:19:00How's it going?
0:19:00 > 0:19:02Rubbish. I still can't find that pig.
0:19:02 > 0:19:04Oh, shame. Do you want some soup?
0:19:04 > 0:19:07- I'll bring it to you in the dining room.- No, thanks.
0:19:07 > 0:19:09I heard some snorting coming from the attic.
0:19:09 > 0:19:12Right, like you heard snorting in the east wing?
0:19:12 > 0:19:14Exactly. SNORTING
0:19:14 > 0:19:16HE SNORTS
0:19:16 > 0:19:17Sorry, I'm getting a cold.
0:19:17 > 0:19:19SNORTING
0:19:19 > 0:19:21- What was that?- Nothing. The attic?
0:19:21 > 0:19:24No, it came from that box.
0:19:24 > 0:19:25No. No, it didn't.
0:19:25 > 0:19:27SQUEALING
0:19:27 > 0:19:30- I knew it! You do have that pig. - No, no, no, no, no, no!
0:19:30 > 0:19:33Out of my way.
0:19:33 > 0:19:36OK, so I lied. But when you see his eyes...
0:19:37 > 0:19:38What eyes?
0:19:42 > 0:19:45These eyes - potato eyes.
0:19:45 > 0:19:48- Oh!- Want one? No? OK.
0:19:55 > 0:19:57Squeaker escape again! It's unbelievable.
0:20:17 > 0:20:20Not bad, missy. Of course, you had a great teacher.
0:20:20 > 0:20:22Yeah, he was fabulous.
0:20:23 > 0:20:25Dani, can I talk to you for a second?
0:20:25 > 0:20:27All right. I'm off to the barbers.
0:20:27 > 0:20:29You're kidding, right?
0:20:30 > 0:20:35I advise you to spend the time left practising.
0:20:35 > 0:20:37You've only one chance to make a first impression.
0:20:37 > 0:20:39Right. I will. For sure.
0:20:40 > 0:20:42OK. Make it quick.
0:20:43 > 0:20:45You know that pig?
0:20:45 > 0:20:47What, the one Kait's been on about? The one who went missing?
0:20:47 > 0:20:50Yeah, that was me. They were going to eat him.
0:20:50 > 0:20:51Right. He is a pig.
0:20:51 > 0:20:54Yeah, but when you see his little eyes and floppy ears...
0:20:54 > 0:20:58Kait's right. You wouldn't last five minutes living off the land.
0:20:58 > 0:20:59I made soup with my bare hands.
0:20:59 > 0:21:02- You need to give piggy back. - I can't. He's escaped.
0:21:02 > 0:21:05I need to find him before Kaitlin does.
0:21:05 > 0:21:07What do you want me to do?
0:21:07 > 0:21:10Kait's on to me so I need you to distract her.
0:21:10 > 0:21:12I need to get ready. The whole village is expecting me.
0:21:12 > 0:21:15Please, Dani. I'm your cousin. We are family, aren't we?
0:21:15 > 0:21:18You heard Mr McGonnigal. If I mess up, he'll never forget.
0:21:18 > 0:21:20Dani, I need you.
0:21:20 > 0:21:21Mr Squeaker needs you.
0:21:21 > 0:21:23Blood is thicker than water.
0:21:23 > 0:21:25What does that actually mean?
0:21:25 > 0:21:28- I have no idea but can you please help me?- OK.
0:21:28 > 0:21:30I know I'm going to regret this.
0:21:31 > 0:21:34SNORTING AND SNUFFLING
0:21:46 > 0:21:48Kait, have you got a sec? I really need your advice.
0:21:48 > 0:21:51- I'm sort of busy. - Oh, it won't take a minute.
0:21:53 > 0:21:55Well? What?
0:21:55 > 0:21:58Oh.
0:21:58 > 0:22:00What do you think I should wear tonight?
0:22:01 > 0:22:03This? Or this?
0:22:03 > 0:22:07Well, I think we can rule out the Slanket.
0:22:07 > 0:22:08And the wetsuit.
0:22:09 > 0:22:12Actually, it's tradition that Lady Dunraven
0:22:12 > 0:22:13wear the Bogmoor ball gown.
0:22:13 > 0:22:15Oh, well, what's that like?
0:22:15 > 0:22:17I look like a giant wedding cake.
0:22:18 > 0:22:21Don't even think about it.
0:22:21 > 0:22:24Dani, I really need to go and find that pig.
0:22:25 > 0:22:27No, no, Kait, wait! No, wait, wait, wait!
0:22:32 > 0:22:34I may never get out of here, you know!
0:22:38 > 0:22:41Come back! Hey, come here!
0:22:41 > 0:22:43Ready? Ready? Ready?
0:22:47 > 0:22:50BOTH: Come back, Mr Squeaker, we've got food!
0:22:51 > 0:22:53SQUEALING
0:22:53 > 0:22:54A-ha!
0:23:14 > 0:23:16- Stop that pig!- Stop that pig!
0:23:16 > 0:23:18Mr Squeaker!
0:23:18 > 0:23:19< Jimmy, he's over there.
0:23:19 > 0:23:21< I got him! I got him! I don't got him.
0:23:21 > 0:23:23< Uh-oh, Kaitlin's coming.
0:23:23 > 0:23:25< Quick, get out there and stall her!
0:23:25 > 0:23:28- Kaitlin. Hi. Pick a card, any card. - Out of my way.
0:23:28 > 0:23:30< Oh, no, the pudding table!
0:23:38 > 0:23:40SNORTING
0:23:40 > 0:23:42Aaah!
0:23:43 > 0:23:46Nice catch, Dani. I knew I could count on you.
0:23:47 > 0:23:49Urgh!
0:23:51 > 0:23:53Only one chance to make a first impression.
0:23:53 > 0:23:56And what an impression you've made.
0:23:56 > 0:23:58We won't forget this in a hurry. The ball is ruined.
0:23:58 > 0:24:01No, it's not. It just needs a tidy.
0:24:01 > 0:24:03A tidy? The place is trashed.
0:24:03 > 0:24:05We need a whole new venue.
0:24:06 > 0:24:09I know. We can have it at mine.
0:24:09 > 0:24:10I do own a castle.
0:24:10 > 0:24:12Boy, I love saying that.
0:24:12 > 0:24:15Right, everyone, grab something and follow me.
0:24:20 > 0:24:23Don't worry about me. I'll be two minutes.
0:24:31 > 0:24:33Mmm. This is good.
0:24:34 > 0:24:36A-ha!
0:24:36 > 0:24:39Cheat. I knew you couldn't go veggie.
0:24:39 > 0:24:42But they smell so good. Even Mr Squeaker tried to eat one.
0:24:43 > 0:24:46Double a-ha! OK, where is he?
0:24:49 > 0:24:52SNORTING
0:24:52 > 0:24:54It's all so confusing.
0:24:54 > 0:24:57I love animals but I also love the way they taste.
0:24:57 > 0:25:00Life was so much easier in the city when chicken came in a bucket
0:25:00 > 0:25:01and didn't have a name.
0:25:01 > 0:25:03I did warn you.
0:25:03 > 0:25:07My dad loves his animals too so he takes care of them.
0:25:07 > 0:25:09If it wasn't for him, they wouldn't be here.
0:25:09 > 0:25:13- Yeah, I guess you're right. - At least that pie's made with pride.
0:25:13 > 0:25:16Which is more than you can say for this microwaveable rubbish.
0:25:16 > 0:25:17Yeah. Fair enough.
0:25:19 > 0:25:22But can't I keep him as a pet?
0:25:22 > 0:25:24Don't go all sentimental on me now.
0:25:24 > 0:25:27But look at his little eyes and his little black snout.
0:25:27 > 0:25:29Don't try and pull that one on me.
0:25:29 > 0:25:32Come on, he is practically family. And after all we've been through...
0:25:32 > 0:25:35SNORTING
0:25:35 > 0:25:37He is really cute.
0:25:37 > 0:25:40- Right, I'll speak to my dad.- Yes!
0:25:40 > 0:25:43But your going to have to pay for him and, like,
0:25:43 > 0:25:46- clean out the barn for a month. - Oh, yeah. No worries.
0:25:46 > 0:25:48Hear that, Squeaks? You're safe.
0:25:52 > 0:25:54CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
0:25:54 > 0:25:56You were great in there.
0:25:56 > 0:25:58That wedgie trick really brought the house down.
0:25:58 > 0:26:01And my pants up. A little bit too far.
0:26:01 > 0:26:03Still, they loved you.
0:26:03 > 0:26:06All they need now is Dani to start the dancing.
0:26:06 > 0:26:09I hope she got most of the muck off that frumpy old dress.
0:26:09 > 0:26:11Wow.
0:26:11 > 0:26:13You look amazing.
0:26:13 > 0:26:15Just a little something I found in the back of the wardrobe.
0:26:15 > 0:26:18This is our dance, Lady Dunraven.
0:26:18 > 0:26:20Let's get this over and done with.
0:26:20 > 0:26:24I'm terribly sorry, my good man, but I believe this lady is taken.
0:26:24 > 0:26:27CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYS
0:26:29 > 0:26:32Fair enough. I bid you good night.
0:26:36 > 0:26:39- Shall we, Lady Dun...?- Ahem.
0:26:39 > 0:26:40I mean, Dani?
0:26:48 > 0:26:50- MUSIC STOPS ABRUPTLY - Yucksville.
0:26:50 > 0:26:51You said it.
0:27:05 > 0:27:08Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd