0:00:34 > 0:00:37Ugh!
0:00:37 > 0:00:39Ah!
0:00:41 > 0:00:42Ah!
0:00:43 > 0:00:44Ah!
0:00:46 > 0:00:48HE WHIMPERS
0:00:48 > 0:00:50Come on!
0:00:52 > 0:00:54Ah!
0:00:54 > 0:00:56Ah!
0:00:56 > 0:00:57Help!
0:00:57 > 0:00:58Help!
0:01:02 > 0:01:05I've had enough. This castle is falling apart.
0:01:05 > 0:01:07Rubbish, it's as solid as a rock.
0:01:09 > 0:01:11OK, maybe it could do with a bit of work.
0:01:11 > 0:01:13But we're broke, we can't afford it.
0:01:13 > 0:01:15We need to think of a way to make money.
0:01:15 > 0:01:19With my looks and your talent, it should be easy. Come on, ideas.
0:01:19 > 0:01:21We could get jobs.
0:01:22 > 0:01:27- Or not.- Or we could build a water park out in the back garden.
0:01:27 > 0:01:30Or a theme park with a zoo.
0:01:30 > 0:01:32Hate to burst your bubble but aren't we trying to make money,
0:01:32 > 0:01:35- not spend it?- Have you got a better idea?- As it happens...
0:01:37 > 0:01:41- # Ta-da! # Pierre Escoffier, the food critic.- Uh?
0:01:41 > 0:01:43He's written a whole article about how there's no decent
0:01:43 > 0:01:47- restaurants in Bogmoor.- So? - So we should open one in the castle.
0:01:47 > 0:01:49It's the perfect venue.
0:01:49 > 0:01:53- Or we could open a planetarium. - Yes, you know.
0:01:53 > 0:01:56I don't know what it is, but it sounds cool.
0:01:56 > 0:01:59Think about it. There's loads of tables and chairs in the cellars.
0:01:59 > 0:02:01Big rooms, won't cost you a penny to set up.
0:02:01 > 0:02:05You're right, it does sound good. Picture it, ready?
0:02:05 > 0:02:08- Bogmoor Planetarium. - Are you even listening to me?
0:02:08 > 0:02:09Uh!
0:02:10 > 0:02:14- What's up with her? - Maybe she don't like planetariums?
0:02:14 > 0:02:16- I thought it was a good idea. - That steak looks good.
0:02:16 > 0:02:20I can't think on an empty stomach. Let's eat.
0:02:22 > 0:02:29- I'm home.- Oh, great. I am starving. - I picked up takeaway.
0:02:29 > 0:02:33- That's disgusting. It's covered in fluff.- It's fine.
0:02:33 > 0:02:35No, I think I'll pass, actually.
0:02:37 > 0:02:41- Ugh!- I did warn you, didn't I?
0:02:41 > 0:02:45I hate anchovy. Get rid of that, would you?
0:02:52 > 0:02:54- Mate, there's no food. - But there must be.
0:03:00 > 0:03:02You're right. Whose turn is it to go shopping?
0:03:02 > 0:03:06Begging your pardon, Master Richard, but isn't all of this food?
0:03:06 > 0:03:09No, mate. Food comes in a sealed plastic tray
0:03:09 > 0:03:12that you put in the microwave. This is just...
0:03:12 > 0:03:15- ingredients.- Then why don't you cook something with it?
0:03:17 > 0:03:20- Good one.- I'm being serious.
0:03:20 > 0:03:23Some of the greatest chefs in history have practised
0:03:23 > 0:03:26the culinary arts in this kitchen.
0:03:26 > 0:03:29- They aren't here now, are they? - Not in person.
0:03:29 > 0:03:32But I did take the trouble to write down their recipes.
0:03:34 > 0:03:35I hope it tastes better than the book.
0:03:37 > 0:03:39Now, if I remember correctly,
0:03:39 > 0:03:43cooking is simply chopping the ingredients, mixing it all together
0:03:43 > 0:03:45and then heating everything up.
0:03:45 > 0:03:48I've seen MasterChef. It's a little bit tougher than that.
0:03:58 > 0:04:01Bon appetit. Lunch is served.
0:04:02 > 0:04:03Looks good.
0:04:09 > 0:04:13- That bad?- It's a taste sensation. Gabe, you're a star.
0:04:14 > 0:04:19- Whoa. Looks like someone's been cooking.- Gabe's made lunch.
0:04:19 > 0:04:20It's proper pukka.
0:04:20 > 0:04:23You know you can sell this stuff and make an absolute...
0:04:25 > 0:04:26Wait a minute.
0:04:27 > 0:04:30Richness has just been struck with a bolt of genius.
0:04:30 > 0:04:33- Why don't we open a restaurant at the castle?- Swagalicious.
0:04:33 > 0:04:36- Why didn't I think of that? - Uh, that was my idea.
0:04:36 > 0:04:38We got tables and chairs down in the cellar.
0:04:38 > 0:04:41You can do the cooking, it'll be perfect.
0:04:41 > 0:04:43I said that. That's my idea.
0:04:43 > 0:04:45What do you say, Gabe? You in?
0:04:45 > 0:04:47- Do you really think my cooking is that good?- Good?
0:04:47 > 0:04:50It can make us a mint.
0:04:50 > 0:04:51Am I invisible?
0:04:51 > 0:04:54Actually, I don't think this dish calls for mint,
0:04:54 > 0:04:57but you could pick some from the garden if you think it needs it.
0:04:57 > 0:04:58Oh, really.
0:05:02 > 0:05:06- What's up with her?- Probably still upset about the planetarium.
0:05:06 > 0:05:09Bam! Must be my lucky day.
0:05:11 > 0:05:13Pizza!
0:05:13 > 0:05:16Oh, it looks like a mouse has got into it.
0:05:16 > 0:05:19- And it's anchovy. - We need to get a cat.
0:05:19 > 0:05:21We want to attract paying customers, not rodents.
0:05:23 > 0:05:26It's not just that he stole my idea, what really bugs me
0:05:26 > 0:05:27is he doesn't even listen.
0:05:27 > 0:05:29DANI LAUGHS
0:05:29 > 0:05:34- Dani...- Hm?- ..are you listening to me?- Of course.
0:05:34 > 0:05:37Rich is going to open a restaurant. Sounds like a great plan.
0:05:37 > 0:05:41- Yeah, my plan which he nicked.- Oh, right. Rich does tend to do that.
0:05:41 > 0:05:43I tell you what, the next time you have an idea,
0:05:43 > 0:05:46why don't you go right ahead without telling him?
0:05:46 > 0:05:47Good idea. Thanks, Dani.
0:05:49 > 0:05:50- What?- Oh, never mind.
0:05:56 > 0:05:59- Candlesticks, carnations.- Cats.
0:06:02 > 0:06:03Dillon!
0:06:04 > 0:06:06I told you to get a mouse killer!
0:06:06 > 0:06:09It is. I borrowed it from the farm next door.
0:06:09 > 0:06:13- They said it was extremely ferocious.- Yeah, right.
0:06:13 > 0:06:20- Hello, puss. Ah! It just bit me. - She killed 12 rabbits.- She's hired.
0:06:20 > 0:06:24Ready, Fluffy? Go kill.
0:06:24 > 0:06:25SHE SCREAMS
0:06:27 > 0:06:30Fluffy? Who let that blood-thirsty maniac in here?
0:06:30 > 0:06:33Kaitlin, just the girl I wanted to see.
0:06:33 > 0:06:36- What do you want? - Look, we need to make some new menus
0:06:36 > 0:06:38and tell everybody about the new restaurant, eh?
0:06:38 > 0:06:39Newest restaurant in town.
0:06:39 > 0:06:42Menus, do you not think it would be better to...
0:06:42 > 0:06:45- DANI'S VOICE:- Next time you have an idea why don't you go right ahead
0:06:45 > 0:06:49- without telling him. - To what?- Nothing, menus it is.
0:06:53 > 0:06:56Cat! It's a cat! Ah!
0:06:56 > 0:06:59CAT MEOWS
0:06:59 > 0:07:01- Cat! Get rid of it.- Me?
0:07:04 > 0:07:06Oh, look. It's only a fluffy kitten.
0:07:06 > 0:07:08I've got this.
0:07:11 > 0:07:19Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Save me. Save me.
0:07:21 > 0:07:22My hero.
0:07:24 > 0:07:26Rich's Restaurant. No.
0:07:26 > 0:07:28Rich's Kitchen?
0:07:28 > 0:07:30An Abundance of Riches?
0:07:30 > 0:07:34- A Bit Rich.- Bogmoor Bistro.- Nice one. Can we fit Rich into that somehow?
0:07:38 > 0:07:42Master Richard, I've prepared the three meals you requested.
0:07:42 > 0:07:44Numero Uno.
0:07:45 > 0:07:52Succulent lamb cutlets with seasonal greens and a fresh mint compote.
0:07:52 > 0:07:53Please.
0:07:56 > 0:08:00- Oh, that is nice.- Number two.
0:08:01 > 0:08:06Pan-fried breast of duck with a penetrating red currant jus
0:08:06 > 0:08:09served with a lustre of caramelised onions
0:08:09 > 0:08:12and freshly whipped, creamed potatoes.
0:08:16 > 0:08:19I tell you what, that's definitely a contender, that one.
0:08:21 > 0:08:27And last, but not least. Chicken with spinach and broccoli.
0:08:31 > 0:08:35Oh, that's the winner. I mean, you can't go wrong with chicken.
0:08:35 > 0:08:37Can you pre-prepare everything?
0:08:37 > 0:08:40Then bish, bash, bosh, the orders come in, happy days.
0:08:40 > 0:08:44Bish... I'd rather not. But if that's what you want...
0:08:44 > 0:08:46That's what I want.
0:08:46 > 0:08:50Look, first rule of restaurant business, keep the money coming in.
0:08:50 > 0:08:54- As you wish.- Don't you think this is a bit too posh?
0:08:54 > 0:08:56Look, sophisticated people come to Bogmoor.
0:08:58 > 0:09:02- No? Well, come on, give me an alternative.- Don't laugh.
0:09:02 > 0:09:04Sandwiches.
0:09:07 > 0:09:10I've got it all worked out. Going to put a sandwich bar right here.
0:09:10 > 0:09:13The bread just there, the filling here.
0:09:13 > 0:09:17And I can serve up my famous double-decker super subs.
0:09:17 > 0:09:19Look, thanks for the offer but this is a dinner restaurant.
0:09:19 > 0:09:21Sandwiches are a lunch-time food.
0:09:21 > 0:09:23Let's just leave the cooking to Gabe, yeah?
0:09:31 > 0:09:32I think it's a good idea.
0:09:32 > 0:09:34You know what, I've got a good feeling about this.
0:09:34 > 0:09:36This one is definitely going to be a winner.
0:09:38 > 0:09:39Don't count on it.
0:09:39 > 0:09:42I wondered how long it would take for her to show up.
0:09:42 > 0:09:43Throw a spanner in the works.
0:09:43 > 0:09:47This family have been ruling over Bogmoor for centuries and I won't
0:09:47 > 0:09:51turn us into a bunch of servants and our castle into a low-rent tavern.
0:09:51 > 0:09:54Look, there's not going to be a castle if it don't get repaired.
0:09:54 > 0:09:57Better that than destroy our reputation.
0:09:57 > 0:10:00Look, I'm not arguing with you. The restaurant will open.
0:10:00 > 0:10:03Over my dead body.
0:10:05 > 0:10:06Isn't she already dead?
0:10:21 > 0:10:23Welcome to Bogmoor Bistro.
0:10:23 > 0:10:24It looks well smart.
0:10:24 > 0:10:28Obviously we can expand a bit. Once the money starts rolling in,
0:10:28 > 0:10:31- we can knock down that wall, build a conservatory.- Nice.
0:10:31 > 0:10:33Can I just make one suggestion?
0:10:33 > 0:10:35Hurry up, we've only got five minutes until we open.
0:10:35 > 0:10:38It won't take a second. I've been thinking about what you said,
0:10:38 > 0:10:41about sandwiches and you know something?
0:10:46 > 0:10:49- Dinner sandwiches. - Dinner sandwiches.
0:10:49 > 0:10:51Everybody loves curry for dinner, right?
0:10:52 > 0:10:54Boom!
0:10:56 > 0:11:01- Voila! Vindaloo sandwich. - I'm speechless.
0:11:01 > 0:11:02Thought you might be.
0:11:02 > 0:11:06You can have a stew sandwich, a spag bol sandwich, a chilli...
0:11:06 > 0:11:10The thing is it's meant to be a really classy restaurant.
0:11:10 > 0:11:13- It's not really what I had in mind. - What do you mean?
0:11:14 > 0:11:16- This is classy.- You're right.
0:11:16 > 0:11:19I just don't want to hurt Gabe's feelings, that's all.
0:11:19 > 0:11:21You're missing out on a golden opportunity here, Rich.
0:11:21 > 0:11:24- You're letting it slip right through your fingers.- You know what?
0:11:24 > 0:11:25You're right.
0:11:25 > 0:11:28Let me take it into consideration and I'll get back to you.
0:11:28 > 0:11:30That's what I'm talking about, cuz.
0:11:30 > 0:11:33Just let me know when you're ready cos I'm ready when you are.
0:11:33 > 0:11:35Vindaloo.
0:11:35 > 0:11:37A definite no.
0:11:40 > 0:11:43What are you doing? Ghosts can't smell anything.
0:11:43 > 0:11:45No, but I can imagine.
0:11:46 > 0:11:49The imagination is a powerful tool.
0:11:49 > 0:11:53And why are you wearing the hat? It makes you look like an idiot.
0:11:53 > 0:11:56I'll thank you to call me chef while you're in my kitchen.
0:11:56 > 0:12:01- Sorry. It makes you look like an idiot, Chef.- You!
0:12:03 > 0:12:05Why don't you go make yourself useful and go fetch me some salt.
0:12:05 > 0:12:07Yes, Chef, whatever you say, Chef.
0:12:20 > 0:12:24- Here you go.- Thank you. - Make sure you don't put too much in.
0:12:24 > 0:12:27I don't think I need advice from you, Ms Flibbertigibbet.
0:12:36 > 0:12:39Menu for you, sir. And for you, Madame.
0:12:39 > 0:12:42Just let me know when you're ready to order, yeah?
0:12:42 > 0:12:45- Rich, I thought you hired some waiters?- I did.
0:12:45 > 0:12:47They was meant to be here a half hour ago.
0:12:47 > 0:12:50So you're waiting for the waiters while you wait for the waiters?
0:12:50 > 0:12:53Yeah. Luckily, there's not a lot of people.
0:12:53 > 0:12:54Hopefully it picks up later.
0:12:54 > 0:12:57Look, you should have invited that food critic from Cait's magazine.
0:12:57 > 0:13:00First rule of the restaurant business,
0:13:00 > 0:13:02don't invite anyone important on the first night.
0:13:02 > 0:13:06- Anything that goes wrong, will go wrong.- Like the waiters being late?
0:13:06 > 0:13:09- Exactly.- Or the kitchen catching fire?- Yeah. That sort of thing.
0:13:09 > 0:13:12- And forgetting about the puddings? - Right...
0:13:13 > 0:13:16The puddings. I forgot about the puddings.
0:13:16 > 0:13:19Where am I going to get puddings in Bogmoor at this hour?
0:13:19 > 0:13:22- Leave it to me, bruv.- You?
0:13:22 > 0:13:24I bake cakes all the time for Drum and Bass.
0:13:24 > 0:13:26But they've got insects and rotten vegetables in it.
0:13:26 > 0:13:30If I wanted something disgusting, I'd ask for Jimmy's rotten sandwiches!
0:13:30 > 0:13:36- OK.- Wait, wait. All right, I need your help.- I won't let you down.
0:13:44 > 0:13:45Go!
0:13:51 > 0:13:56- I think the humans are cooking with cheese.- Cheese sauce.- Oh!
0:13:56 > 0:13:58Cheese souffle.
0:13:58 > 0:13:59Do you think the cat's gone?
0:14:01 > 0:14:03Roxy, I think it's asleep.
0:14:04 > 0:14:09- Now's your chance. Seize the cheese, Diego. Run like the wind.- Souffle.
0:14:09 > 0:14:10Go.
0:14:19 > 0:14:20CAT MEOWS
0:14:22 > 0:14:23Ah! Ah!
0:14:30 > 0:14:33- Leave it.- Ow! Just wanted a taste, all right.
0:14:37 > 0:14:38You again.
0:14:38 > 0:14:42How am I supposed to work with all these people crowding around me?
0:14:42 > 0:14:44- I need my space. - Calm down, it's only food.
0:14:46 > 0:14:48- So, what are you doing? - Making pastry.
0:14:51 > 0:14:56- That's too much flour, you know.- No, it isn't.- Yes, it is.
0:14:56 > 0:14:59- If you want to do it differently, make your own.- Fine.
0:14:59 > 0:15:02- You, me, bake-off.- You're on.
0:15:02 > 0:15:06Did somebody say bake-off cos you will need a judge.
0:15:08 > 0:15:09Bad news.
0:15:09 > 0:15:11I've just spoken to the catering company
0:15:11 > 0:15:14and all the waiters have gone down with food poisoning.
0:15:14 > 0:15:18- Ah, what a shame.- I'm just going to have to serve everything myself.
0:15:19 > 0:15:21Be quick or they'll go cold.
0:15:21 > 0:15:22HE SCREAMS
0:15:22 > 0:15:24And be careful, the plates are hot.
0:15:24 > 0:15:25Thanks for the warning.
0:15:28 > 0:15:30- Wait, wait.- What?
0:15:32 > 0:15:36Un, deux, bon appetit.
0:15:41 > 0:15:45Chicken for the sir. Lamb for you. Is that everything?
0:15:45 > 0:15:48- Yes, this looks lovely thank you. - Bon appetit.
0:15:48 > 0:15:49Waiter!
0:15:49 > 0:15:54- Yeah. So you ready to order?- Yes. - What would you like?
0:15:54 > 0:15:57- I'd like the duck and my wife will have the...- Ugh!
0:15:57 > 0:15:58(Give me a minute.)
0:15:59 > 0:16:02Is everything all right?
0:16:02 > 0:16:08- This food is horrible.- It's too sweet. Can't eat this.- Are you sure?
0:16:08 > 0:16:09You try it.
0:16:09 > 0:16:11Give me some of that.
0:16:14 > 0:16:15Yeah, no.
0:16:17 > 0:16:19Hold that.
0:16:19 > 0:16:21Let me replace that for you, yeah?
0:16:25 > 0:16:29Ah, welcome to Bogmoor Bistro. Table for two? Sit anywhere you like, mate.
0:16:29 > 0:16:35- Waiter.- Yes.- Our order? - Two seconds, mate. Yeah.
0:16:39 > 0:16:42Well, clearly, they need their taste buds examined.
0:16:42 > 0:16:45I'm sorry, Gabe, but I've tasted it. What did you put in it?
0:16:45 > 0:16:47Only what the recipe called for.
0:16:51 > 0:16:56- This is sugar, you fool.- It is not. It says salt.
0:16:56 > 0:16:58Look, it doesn't matter what it says. Did you taste it?
0:16:58 > 0:17:01- I can't, I'm a ghost. - So it is your fault.
0:17:01 > 0:17:03It's your fault for mislabelling the jar.
0:17:03 > 0:17:07- How many of the dishes did you put that in?- Only this one.
0:17:07 > 0:17:12And this one and this one and this one and this one and that one.
0:17:12 > 0:17:15- So everything. - You could say that, yes.
0:17:15 > 0:17:18We're going to have to throw all this away and start over again.
0:17:18 > 0:17:21- Right, one tiny problem with that. - Don't argue with me.- I'm not.
0:17:21 > 0:17:25It's only that you asked me to make everything in advance.
0:17:25 > 0:17:29- So?- So there is no more food. That's everything.- What!
0:17:29 > 0:17:32Only these few scraps and I can't cook with those.
0:17:32 > 0:17:35I've got hungry diners out there waiting for food.
0:17:35 > 0:17:36What am I meant to say?
0:17:36 > 0:17:39Guess you'll be needing my dinner sandwiches after all then.
0:17:39 > 0:17:42No, Jimmy. No dinner sandwiches. Not now, not ever, mate.
0:17:42 > 0:17:46Fine, but when there's a Jimmy's on every single street corner,
0:17:46 > 0:17:47you'll be eating those words.
0:17:47 > 0:17:50Better than eating your sandwiches, isn't it?
0:17:50 > 0:17:54Look, Gabe, you've got us into this mess, you can get us out.
0:17:54 > 0:17:57Well, if that's your attitude, I can only see one course of action.
0:17:57 > 0:18:00- Which is?- I quit.
0:18:00 > 0:18:05- No!- Great. No waiters, no food and no chefs.
0:18:05 > 0:18:08I give it five minutes before this whole kitchen goes up in flames.
0:18:08 > 0:18:11Right, as the owner of this restaurant,
0:18:11 > 0:18:13I'm making an executive decision.
0:18:13 > 0:18:17We're closed for the evening. Everybody stop what they're doing.
0:18:17 > 0:18:19Don't even think about it.
0:18:19 > 0:18:20I want pie.
0:18:20 > 0:18:23We'll have to start fresh tomorrow.
0:18:23 > 0:18:24At least things can't get any worse.
0:18:29 > 0:18:32Hello. Could I have everyone's attention, please.
0:18:32 > 0:18:35I've got a really important announcement to make.
0:18:35 > 0:18:40- Rich, I have got fantastic news. - Not right now, I'm busy.
0:18:41 > 0:18:44You know how you told me to go out and make the menus,
0:18:44 > 0:18:46- spread the word about the restaurant?- Yeah.
0:18:46 > 0:18:49Well, I've only gone and done one better than that.
0:18:49 > 0:18:53It wasn't easy but I have persuaded Pierre Escoffier to come
0:18:53 > 0:18:55and review the restaurant.
0:18:55 > 0:19:00- Pierre who?- The restaurant critic. Out of the magazine.- Oh, when?- Now.
0:19:00 > 0:19:03- You what?- I know. It's going to be in the national press.
0:19:03 > 0:19:05Millions of people are going to read about us.
0:19:05 > 0:19:08Oh!
0:19:09 > 0:19:15Welcome to the Bogmoor Bistro, Monsieur Escoffier.
0:19:15 > 0:19:17As I was saying, because it's our opening night,
0:19:17 > 0:19:21everything...is on the house.
0:19:28 > 0:19:32- What do you mean there's no food? - And no chef and no waiters.
0:19:32 > 0:19:33This is a disaster.
0:19:33 > 0:19:36You couldn't organise an omelette in a hen house you, could you?
0:19:36 > 0:19:38So it's my fault? You're the one who invited Mr...
0:19:40 > 0:19:42Whatever his name is without telling me.
0:19:42 > 0:19:44Because you never listen to any of my ideas.
0:19:44 > 0:19:47This whole restaurant thing was my idea and you stole it.
0:19:47 > 0:19:53- No, I did not.- Yes, you did. - This isn't getting us anywhere.
0:19:53 > 0:19:55There's people in there that are hungry and we've got no food.
0:19:55 > 0:19:57Great reviews we're going to get.
0:19:57 > 0:20:00Fine, I'll go to the kitchen and try to rustle something up
0:20:00 > 0:20:03and you just stay here and try to keep everyone happy.
0:20:03 > 0:20:06- Fine, but I'm still angry. - And I'm still angry with you.
0:20:13 > 0:20:15- That's it?- That's it.
0:20:16 > 0:20:18- This is going to take a miracle. - Six orders table...
0:20:18 > 0:20:21They'll eat what we've got.
0:20:21 > 0:20:22Right.
0:20:31 > 0:20:33Bread for you, sir. Have a menu.
0:20:35 > 0:20:38About the menu, there's not a lot that we've actually got
0:20:38 > 0:20:42so I'll bring you the best thing that we have.
0:20:42 > 0:20:43Waiter!
0:20:43 > 0:20:45Yes.
0:20:47 > 0:20:50Will it be much longer? We would like to get home before Christmas.
0:20:50 > 0:20:53It shouldn't be, but in the meantime...
0:20:55 > 0:20:57..have some bread. Enjoy.
0:21:02 > 0:21:07- How's it going?- It's in the oven. All I can do now is hope.- Not you.
0:21:08 > 0:21:11- Side dishes look good. Where's the rest?- Ha-ha.
0:21:12 > 0:21:14That's everything, isn't it?
0:21:14 > 0:21:16You're really going to have to work that silver tongue of yours
0:21:16 > 0:21:19- if we're going to pull this off. - Don't worry.
0:21:19 > 0:21:20Leave it to the master.
0:21:24 > 0:21:25Grub's up. Enjoy.
0:21:29 > 0:21:32Sorry for the delay. This might not be exactly what you ordered.
0:21:32 > 0:21:35Something is better than nothing, I suppose.
0:21:36 > 0:21:38- Voila!- Oh!
0:21:38 > 0:21:42- A bit small, isn't it?- Small, there's always one, isn't there?
0:21:44 > 0:21:48- It's about quality, not quantity. - Is that right?
0:21:48 > 0:21:53- You never heard of petit bouche dining?- Party what?
0:21:53 > 0:21:56Petit bouche dining. It's exclusive small portions.
0:21:56 > 0:21:58It's massive in the big city restaurants.
0:21:58 > 0:22:01- That's what I keep telling you, Terry.- Listen to the missus.
0:22:01 > 0:22:04He's so unsophisticated.
0:22:04 > 0:22:05Course I've heard of it.
0:22:07 > 0:22:11Lovely. Best party food I've ever had.
0:22:11 > 0:22:13- Superb.- My compliments to the chef.
0:22:20 > 0:22:22Bakers, your time is up.
0:22:23 > 0:22:27Presentation wise, Dylan, this is appalling.
0:22:27 > 0:22:29Ha! Mine's appalling. Oh, yeah.
0:22:31 > 0:22:34Now that's more like it. Beautiful crisp meringue.
0:22:34 > 0:22:36- I think we have a winner.- Ha!
0:22:36 > 0:22:39- In your face, Dylan. - But first, the tasting.
0:22:44 > 0:22:48Bit bland. Your curd is curdled. Pretty average, I'd say.
0:22:48 > 0:22:49Now for this bad boy.
0:23:03 > 0:23:04It's full of salt.
0:23:07 > 0:23:10Ha-ha! In your face, I used brown sugar.
0:23:11 > 0:23:16- Sorry, Esme, but Dylan's the winner.- I demand a rematch.
0:23:18 > 0:23:21- Well?- I'm sorry but...
0:23:22 > 0:23:25- ..they loved it. - Seriously?- Seriously.
0:23:25 > 0:23:26I had to talk them around a bit,
0:23:26 > 0:23:30but you know Rich could sell ice to Eskimos.
0:23:30 > 0:23:33Who needs a 300-year-old cookbook when you've got natural talent?
0:23:33 > 0:23:35- We make a good team. - Yeah, what a team.
0:23:39 > 0:23:42Listen, I'm sorry I didn't give you enough credit.
0:23:42 > 0:23:45- I couldn't have done it without you. - It's all right.
0:23:45 > 0:23:48Sorry I went behind your back about Mr Escoffier.
0:23:48 > 0:23:51Speaking of which, we need one more final meal to impress the critic.
0:23:51 > 0:23:53- What?- One more meal.
0:23:55 > 0:23:56Please tell me there's something left.
0:23:56 > 0:23:58I thought one of them was for him.
0:24:00 > 0:24:01- You don't suppose...- No.
0:24:02 > 0:24:03Pudding.
0:24:06 > 0:24:07We have to give him something.
0:24:07 > 0:24:09RICH COUGHS
0:24:12 > 0:24:17Monsieur, I'm so sorry about the wait.
0:24:17 > 0:24:18Yours took a little bit longer
0:24:18 > 0:24:23because we wanted to give you the speciality of the house.
0:24:23 > 0:24:25Jimmy!
0:24:28 > 0:24:33Dinner sandwiches. I've got curry, spag bol, chilli too.
0:24:35 > 0:24:37Or it could be stew.
0:24:37 > 0:24:42By heck. That looks lovely. Give me some of that spag bol.
0:24:42 > 0:24:47I thought you were going to palm me off with that arty farty nonsense,
0:24:47 > 0:24:50but this is proper grub and large portions too.
0:24:50 > 0:24:52There you go, sir.
0:24:52 > 0:24:53Dinner sandwiches.
0:24:53 > 0:24:56It's amazing somebody hadn't thought of it before.
0:24:58 > 0:25:01- Did you say chilli? - I'll have the curry.- One at a time.
0:25:01 > 0:25:04- Do you have any puddings? - Glad you asked.
0:25:06 > 0:25:08Lemon meringue, anyone?
0:25:08 > 0:25:11I knew this would be a hit. Just for you, boom.
0:25:14 > 0:25:16I can't believe you got away with it.
0:25:16 > 0:25:18Yeah, Mr Escoffier promised us
0:25:18 > 0:25:21- a five-star write-up in the morning paper.- Wow, that's great.
0:25:21 > 0:25:25You'll probably get ten times as many customers tomorrow night.
0:25:25 > 0:25:30- Dani!- Oh, that's my cue. How's my make-up?- Yeah, fine.- Got to go.
0:25:31 > 0:25:33Laters.
0:25:33 > 0:25:36- I forgot all about tomorrow night. - Ten times as many customers.
0:25:36 > 0:25:40- And not just tomorrow night. - Seven nights a week.
0:25:42 > 0:25:44- Every week. - Serving dinner sandwiches.
0:25:46 > 0:25:49You know, I'm not really sure that restaurant idea of yours
0:25:49 > 0:25:52- was all that good, Rich. - My idea? It was your idea.
0:25:52 > 0:25:53You know what,
0:25:53 > 0:25:57I think it's quite nice living in a castle that's falling apart.
0:25:57 > 0:26:00I know what you mean. The castle's got character, isn't it?
0:26:00 > 0:26:01More of a sense of history.
0:26:03 > 0:26:05Right, that settles it. I'm closing the restaurant down.
0:26:08 > 0:26:12Hey, Rich! I nearly forgot. I had an idea.
0:26:14 > 0:26:20- Forget it, it's not the right time. - No, go on.- Castle Laser Quest.- Sweet.
0:26:20 > 0:26:25Fill the corridors with some dry ice, add UV lights, charge entry.
0:26:25 > 0:26:30- That ain't a bad idea, you know. That could be a winner.- Really?- Wooh!
0:26:32 > 0:26:34And here we go again.
0:26:49 > 0:26:51Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd