0:00:08 > 0:00:09Co-Ordinator Zang!
0:00:09 > 0:00:13- Couldn't you cut your toenails in your private quarters?- Impossible!
0:00:13 > 0:00:14I don't want to miss the show.
0:00:18 > 0:00:20Pass me a snack.
0:00:26 > 0:00:28Hmm, extra crunchy!
0:00:30 > 0:00:33Hi, my name is Dani, and this is my wonderful...
0:00:33 > 0:00:35- I'm Sam, her best friend! - Oi! As I was saying...
0:00:35 > 0:00:37I'm her best friend, too. Toby.
0:00:37 > 0:00:40As I was saying, this is my show. Max!
0:00:40 > 0:00:43- That's me! I'm her brother. - And I'm his best friend, Ben.
0:00:43 > 0:00:47As I was saying, my name is Dani, and this is my show.
0:00:47 > 0:00:49- It's not your show!- It's my show!
0:00:49 > 0:00:52THEY ALL TALK AT ONCE
0:00:56 > 0:00:59To all of my fans out there, wherever you may be -
0:00:59 > 0:01:01terrestrial or non-terrestrial -
0:01:01 > 0:01:03I want to thank you for my birthday messages.
0:01:03 > 0:01:06This one just arrived.
0:01:06 > 0:01:08To Dani, from someone out of this world...
0:01:10 > 0:01:11You sent her a gift?
0:01:14 > 0:01:17A teeny space doll's outfit?!
0:01:20 > 0:01:22Can't wait to see how you guys surprise me tomorrow!
0:01:22 > 0:01:25Don't you think it's time we grew out of the whole birthday thing?
0:01:25 > 0:01:30Hello?! You can't grow out of birthdays! They happen once a year!
0:01:30 > 0:01:31PHONE BEEPS
0:01:31 > 0:01:34More birthday texts! I AM popular this week!
0:01:40 > 0:01:44Now I'm confused! I thought we were throwing her a surprise party.
0:01:44 > 0:01:45We are - tomorrow.
0:01:45 > 0:01:48So, why don't we put her out of her misery and tell her?
0:01:48 > 0:01:50Then it won't be a surprise!
0:01:50 > 0:01:52Good point. Maybe we should go back up.
0:01:52 > 0:01:55- We don't want her to get suspicious. - Do you think?!
0:01:56 > 0:02:00- Anyway, I've got to get going. - Me too.
0:02:00 > 0:02:01I've rented a DVD for tonight!
0:02:01 > 0:02:04You guys don't want to hang until midnight,
0:02:04 > 0:02:07and be the first person to wish me a happy birthday,
0:02:07 > 0:02:08like we do every year?
0:02:08 > 0:02:11Happy birthday for tomorrow. Can I go home now?
0:02:11 > 0:02:14You won't forget to talk me up to that coffee house boss,
0:02:14 > 0:02:15so I can get that job?
0:02:15 > 0:02:18Why do you want to work in that place?
0:02:18 > 0:02:19Do you know how much they pay?
0:02:19 > 0:02:21I'll be loaded!
0:02:21 > 0:02:24Plus, that purple uniform will really do something for me.
0:02:24 > 0:02:26It's called humiliation.
0:02:26 > 0:02:28Remember the favour you're going to do me.
0:02:28 > 0:02:31When your choir teacher calls, I've got to be your mum.
0:02:31 > 0:02:34Tell him you are not allowing me to do an E Minor choir.
0:02:34 > 0:02:38We don't want her becoming even more a geek than she already is.
0:02:38 > 0:02:40Could you stop referring to me as a geek?
0:02:40 > 0:02:43The accepted term is "socially challenged".
0:02:43 > 0:02:48- So, how are we celebrating tomorrow? Eh? Eh? Eh?- Ow!
0:02:49 > 0:02:54Ha, ha, ha! That Toby fellow!
0:02:54 > 0:02:56He totally cracks me up!
0:02:59 > 0:03:01Ow!
0:03:02 > 0:03:04Sorry, Dani, I've got school the next day,
0:03:04 > 0:03:05so it'll have to be an early one for me.
0:03:05 > 0:03:09Yeah, same here. Except I don't have school, obviously.
0:03:09 > 0:03:13- Although I may have a fractured wrist.- Maybe we could just watch TV?
0:03:13 > 0:03:16OK, and maybe next year I can tweak some dates on my birth certificate,
0:03:16 > 0:03:19- to synch with your social calendars! - You'd do that?
0:03:19 > 0:03:24Thanks, Dani - what a pal! Right, better get this X-rayed. See you!
0:03:26 > 0:03:30After all I've done for their birthdays, don't they even care?
0:03:30 > 0:03:34Max! Step away from the TV! I've got dibs.
0:03:34 > 0:03:37You've watched it every night this week. My turn.
0:03:37 > 0:03:39Nope, I've rented a thriller.
0:03:39 > 0:03:43To see alone? You got scared watching the Wizard of Oz!
0:03:43 > 0:03:45Those Munchkins ARE kind of freaky.
0:03:47 > 0:03:48What have you done?
0:03:52 > 0:03:54OK, it's war! And, Dani,
0:03:54 > 0:03:56if you insist on watching scary films alone,
0:03:56 > 0:04:00you might want to borrow one of the baby's nappies.
0:04:00 > 0:04:02I am not scared of the Munchkins.
0:04:02 > 0:04:05One time, I simply spilt a glass of water. That's all.
0:04:05 > 0:04:10Sure, and your gorgeous boyfriend is coming around in half an hour!
0:04:10 > 0:04:12Has she GOT a boyfriend?
0:04:12 > 0:04:14Shut up, you're ruining it!
0:04:23 > 0:04:26TELEPHONE RINGS
0:04:29 > 0:04:34- Hello? - 'Have you checked the children yet?'
0:04:34 > 0:04:36Children?
0:04:36 > 0:04:39I don't have any children.
0:04:39 > 0:04:43'Is this 498 0585?'
0:04:43 > 0:04:45No...
0:04:45 > 0:04:48'Sorry, wrong number.
0:04:48 > 0:04:53'Don't you just hate it when that happens? Ha ha ha ha!'
0:04:54 > 0:04:57BANGING ON DOOR
0:05:13 > 0:05:14SHE SCREAMS
0:05:14 > 0:05:18We represent the lollipop kids,
0:05:18 > 0:05:22the lollipop kids, the lollipop kids!
0:05:22 > 0:05:25Trick or treat! Ha ha ha ha ha!
0:05:25 > 0:05:29Munchkins! Aargh!
0:05:33 > 0:05:37I'm not scared.
0:05:38 > 0:05:40Me, neither.
0:05:42 > 0:05:44Aargh!
0:05:53 > 0:05:55Aargh!
0:05:56 > 0:05:59Morning! Are you OK?
0:05:59 > 0:06:01Fine. Fine, I'm fine.
0:06:01 > 0:06:03- Late night?- Couldn't sleep.
0:06:03 > 0:06:05DVD was a little intense.
0:06:05 > 0:06:06Yeah, when I'm jumpy,
0:06:06 > 0:06:09overdosing on caffeine really helps to calm me down.
0:06:09 > 0:06:13- So, have you taken our calls? - What calls?- My choir teacher.
0:06:13 > 0:06:16- The coffee house boss? - Aren't you forgetting something?
0:06:16 > 0:06:21- Oh, right. Happy birthday, and stuff. - Oh, right, yeah. Happy birthday.
0:06:21 > 0:06:25Thank you. If you want, you can give me my present now.
0:06:25 > 0:06:26Umm, sorry, Dani.
0:06:26 > 0:06:30What with my maths tutor and the new kid I am sponsoring in Africa,
0:06:30 > 0:06:32I couldn't really afford anything.
0:06:32 > 0:06:33Nothing at all?
0:06:33 > 0:06:36You guys must have made me something.
0:06:36 > 0:06:39A thoughtful, hand-made gift that comes from the heart?
0:06:45 > 0:06:48You made it yourself? That is so sweet.
0:06:48 > 0:06:51We would have done the roof, but we just ran out of time.
0:06:51 > 0:06:54That's OK, it's the thought that counts, silly.
0:07:00 > 0:07:04If you hadn't reminded us about your birthday, we would have forgotten.
0:07:04 > 0:07:06I need the loo.
0:07:06 > 0:07:09Oh, I'll go with you.
0:07:09 > 0:07:12You're going to the loo with Sam?
0:07:12 > 0:07:16No. Obviously. That would be weird.
0:07:16 > 0:07:18Just going to keep watch.
0:07:21 > 0:07:23Why did you say that for?
0:07:23 > 0:07:28I can't believe it. They forgot, and they didn't even give me a present.
0:07:28 > 0:07:31TELEPHONE RINGS
0:07:31 > 0:07:35Hello? Oh, yes, the coffee house manager.
0:07:35 > 0:07:38You want to know what I really think of Toby?
0:07:38 > 0:07:41Don't you think honesty really is the best policy?
0:07:44 > 0:07:47I wouldn't call Toby a liar, not to his face.
0:07:47 > 0:07:49But he's never worked in a coffee house in his life.
0:07:49 > 0:07:54I wouldn't hire him. Glad to help. Bye bye, now.
0:07:54 > 0:07:55What do you think you're doing?
0:07:55 > 0:07:57It's war.
0:07:57 > 0:08:01This is what's known as a pre-emptive strike.
0:08:01 > 0:08:05Yeah! Premp... Pre... Pre... What he said.
0:08:05 > 0:08:06TELEPHONE RINGS
0:08:06 > 0:08:08Hello?
0:08:08 > 0:08:11Sam, yes, she wanted me to pretend to be her mum,
0:08:11 > 0:08:14and come up with some bogus excuse,
0:08:14 > 0:08:18but the truth is, Sam's mum would love her to be in the E Minors.
0:08:18 > 0:08:21I'll text you her number. OK, bye-bye, now.
0:08:21 > 0:08:25Snooze, you lose!
0:08:25 > 0:08:28A universal remote control!
0:08:31 > 0:08:34No batteries! You may have won the battle,
0:08:34 > 0:08:37but you'll never win the war.
0:08:37 > 0:08:39Bye-bye, now!
0:08:39 > 0:08:43- Happy birthday, Dani! Here, we got you a card.- A card!
0:08:43 > 0:08:45CARD PLAYS A TUNE
0:08:45 > 0:08:47Well, I don't know what to say.
0:08:47 > 0:08:51So, who what was that, then? We heard the phone ringing.
0:08:51 > 0:08:55- Yeah, how did it go?- To be honest, it could have gone a little better.
0:08:55 > 0:08:58Deliberately sabotaged us! Why would you do that?
0:08:58 > 0:09:00I thought you forgot my birthday.
0:09:00 > 0:09:03All you got me was this tacky card. It's a little disappointing.
0:09:03 > 0:09:05Do you have any idea what this does to my summer?
0:09:05 > 0:09:08Come on, guys. I know I may have been a teeny bit harsh,
0:09:08 > 0:09:10but all I did was tell the truth.
0:09:12 > 0:09:15I'm guessing the truth isn't going to make you guys feel any better...
0:09:17 > 0:09:19You do not deserve that card.
0:09:19 > 0:09:21You've gone too far this time, Dani.
0:09:21 > 0:09:23I could kill you.
0:09:23 > 0:09:28INDISTINCT SPEECH
0:09:33 > 0:09:36This situation can only be solved one way.
0:09:36 > 0:09:37We hypnotise Dani,
0:09:37 > 0:09:41and make her believe she's a llama for the rest of her life.
0:09:41 > 0:09:43OK, two ways.
0:09:43 > 0:09:47We lure her with treats into the space shuttle Discovery,
0:09:47 > 0:09:50then strand her on the International Space Station.
0:09:50 > 0:09:51OK, three ways.
0:09:51 > 0:09:55What I really need is my own personal DVD player.
0:09:55 > 0:09:57See, now you're dreaming.
0:09:57 > 0:10:00Let's at least deal within the realms of possibility.
0:10:03 > 0:10:05OK, thanks, Mum. That's so good of you.
0:10:05 > 0:10:09- Fantastic. Bye!- Has your mum got you out of the E-Minors?
0:10:09 > 0:10:12My mum got me IN the E-Minors! They're going to Paris this summer,
0:10:12 > 0:10:15- and she'll pay for it. - You've always wanted to go to Italy.
0:10:15 > 0:10:18Anyway, did you manage to call the coffee house manager?
0:10:18 > 0:10:21Yeah, good news. There's no way he's going to give me the job.
0:10:21 > 0:10:22And that IS good news...?
0:10:22 > 0:10:25Yeah, turns out it's £100 a month,
0:10:25 > 0:10:28not £100 an hour, like I thought.
0:10:28 > 0:10:30Looks like Dani DID do the right thing.
0:10:30 > 0:10:33We'd better get on with organising her surprise party.
0:10:33 > 0:10:35Great idea. Sorry, that card keeps repeating on me!
0:10:44 > 0:10:47I suppose the musical card was kind of cute.
0:10:47 > 0:10:49That doesn't make it OK to lie for them.
0:10:49 > 0:10:53But they're my best friends. I could have really helped them out.
0:10:53 > 0:10:55You're right! Why SHOULD I help them out?
0:10:55 > 0:10:58All they got me for my birthday was a stupid little card.
0:10:58 > 0:11:03Who was talking to you?
0:11:03 > 0:11:06I suppose you're right. It was musical, and it was kinda cute.
0:11:09 > 0:11:12You're a great listener, you know that?
0:11:12 > 0:11:13I did a horrible thing.
0:11:13 > 0:11:16I'm just lucky they're not the kind to seek revenge.
0:11:27 > 0:11:29Co-Ordinator Zang!
0:11:29 > 0:11:31What is revenge?
0:11:31 > 0:11:34Remember how last lunar cycle I glued your antennas together,
0:11:34 > 0:11:37hung you on a door and used you for a coat hanger?
0:11:38 > 0:11:40Oh, fun stuff!
0:11:40 > 0:11:44Well, revenge would be you performing some balancing action
0:11:44 > 0:11:45to get back at me.
0:11:45 > 0:11:49I see. Could be satisfying.
0:11:50 > 0:11:55Wow! Wait a minute. This is the transporter beam.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57- What are you doing?- Revenge!
0:11:57 > 0:11:59And guess what? It IS satisfying!
0:12:10 > 0:12:15Luckily, I had my personal transporter with me.
0:12:15 > 0:12:17From now on,
0:12:17 > 0:12:21revenge is banned on this ship, and that is an order, Co-Ordinator Zark.
0:12:50 > 0:12:51What?!
0:12:53 > 0:12:55I said, come in!
0:12:55 > 0:12:58Coast is clear. Do you think we've got time for a sandwich?
0:13:03 > 0:13:06Did you remember to invite her friends from the theatre group?
0:13:06 > 0:13:08Yes, they were in the e-mail I sent.
0:13:08 > 0:13:12- What about booking a band? - I went with the Professional Hitmen.
0:13:15 > 0:13:18I should apologise. Thank them for the card.
0:13:18 > 0:13:19It's the least I can do.
0:13:19 > 0:13:22Whatever happens, we must act completely normal.
0:13:22 > 0:13:24She mustn't suspect a thing.
0:13:24 > 0:13:28- We're really going to slay her. - Dani is totally going to die.
0:13:28 > 0:13:30I'm going to die?!
0:13:30 > 0:13:33So, what time are these professional hitmen arriving?
0:13:33 > 0:13:37Six. I'm going to sneak them in, so she doesn't know they're here.
0:13:37 > 0:13:39Are you sure they know what they're doing?
0:13:39 > 0:13:43Relax, these guys are professionals, and they do it all the time.
0:13:43 > 0:13:45They specialise in well-executed hits.
0:13:45 > 0:13:50They bring their own equipment, and they even clean up after themselves.
0:13:50 > 0:13:53Man, they're going to blow her away.
0:13:55 > 0:13:58They've hired professional assassins!
0:13:58 > 0:14:00All because I ruined their phone calls.
0:14:00 > 0:14:03I understand if they want to get revenge, but to kill me...
0:14:14 > 0:14:16Are those balloons?
0:14:18 > 0:14:21No. Yes.
0:14:21 > 0:14:24Maybe.
0:14:24 > 0:14:26So what if they are?
0:14:26 > 0:14:28Well done, Toby, nicely covered up.
0:14:28 > 0:14:33- If I'm not mistaken, that's a birthday cake.- No.
0:14:33 > 0:14:38- It's a school project I'm doing. - You don't go to school.
0:14:40 > 0:14:43You're planning a surprise party for Dani!
0:14:43 > 0:14:46- Who told you?- I knew it.
0:14:46 > 0:14:48Please don't ruin the surprise!
0:14:48 > 0:14:51You want hush money? Fine, here's my purse, £3.60. Take it.
0:14:51 > 0:14:53I don't want your money.
0:14:55 > 0:14:58I want to know what you're giving Dani for her birthday.
0:14:58 > 0:15:00All her friends are chipping in.
0:15:00 > 0:15:04We're getting her a necklace she admired in the shopping centre.
0:15:06 > 0:15:09You're not getting her a necklace.
0:15:09 > 0:15:12BOTH: We are not getting her a necklace.
0:15:12 > 0:15:14If you want me to keep the party secret,
0:15:14 > 0:15:19you will get her a multi-regional combi TV and DVD player.
0:15:19 > 0:15:23We're getting her a multi-regional combi TV and DVD player.
0:15:23 > 0:15:26Or I tell her everything.
0:15:26 > 0:15:29- Let's go, Ben.- Let's go, Ben.
0:15:35 > 0:15:38It's really nice of you to get Dani a TV and DVD player,
0:15:38 > 0:15:39but how does that help us?
0:15:39 > 0:15:42- Because it will be mine!- But how?
0:15:42 > 0:15:45Remember when you said I'd never get Dani grounded?
0:15:46 > 0:15:49- What happened?- You soaked your mum's dress in bleach,
0:15:49 > 0:15:51then planted the evidence in Dani's wardrobe.
0:15:51 > 0:15:54When you said it was impossible to shave off Dani's eyebrows?
0:15:54 > 0:15:57You waited until she was jet-lagged, then snuck in while she slept.
0:15:57 > 0:15:59Which means the lesson is?
0:15:59 > 0:16:02- You're a bad brother. - Never say never.
0:16:04 > 0:16:06Ha, ha, ha!
0:16:20 > 0:16:23Keep it together. Keep it together.
0:16:23 > 0:16:27I know you love drama. You have an incredibly fertile imagination,
0:16:27 > 0:16:31but this is crazy. Your friends love you. Everybody loves you.
0:16:31 > 0:16:34There has to be a perfectly reasonable...
0:16:34 > 0:16:37Do you know what, I actually think this is working.
0:16:39 > 0:16:41OK, my legs have gone to sleep.
0:16:49 > 0:16:54Excuse me! Meet Dani's birthday boyfriend.
0:16:54 > 0:16:56He's cute! Where did you find him?
0:16:56 > 0:16:59- In a skip outside the clothes store on the High Street.- You stole him.
0:16:59 > 0:17:01Relax! No-one will miss him.
0:17:03 > 0:17:05It's Dani!
0:17:12 > 0:17:14Oh, help! His arm's stuck!
0:17:22 > 0:17:23Aargh!
0:17:23 > 0:17:27Oh, sorry, wrong door! I wanted to see Max.
0:17:27 > 0:17:30Dani, we're so mad with you right now.
0:17:30 > 0:17:33If I were you, I would stay out of our way.
0:17:33 > 0:17:36Yeah, for like, the entire day.
0:17:36 > 0:17:38Fine, fine, whatever you want.
0:17:38 > 0:17:42I didn't see anything. No, nothing at all. I've got to run.
0:17:42 > 0:17:44I think she bought it.
0:17:47 > 0:17:51How many more victims are there? I'm next. My mum is going to be annoyed
0:17:51 > 0:17:54they're using her broom cupboard to store dead bodies!
0:18:15 > 0:18:17OK, I'm guessing something's up.
0:18:17 > 0:18:20Sam and Toby, they're planning to kill me.
0:18:20 > 0:18:23You just watched the one thriller last night, correct?
0:18:23 > 0:18:26I overheard them planning it. They've hired professional hitmen.
0:18:26 > 0:18:29And they're storing a dead body in the broom cupboard.
0:18:29 > 0:18:30You've got to help me!
0:18:30 > 0:18:33You know, I never liked Sam and Toby.
0:18:33 > 0:18:36They're such shady characters.
0:18:36 > 0:18:41Make sure you're somewhere easy to clean when it happens.
0:18:41 > 0:18:45You know how nutty Mum can be about spills on the carpet.
0:18:45 > 0:18:46Blood can be so splashy.
0:18:48 > 0:18:49There's going to be blood?
0:18:49 > 0:18:53What did you do to turn your best friends into your worse enemies?
0:18:53 > 0:18:56You're right, this is all my fault.
0:18:56 > 0:18:59If only there was a way I could turn back time and fix everything...
0:19:02 > 0:19:04Please, you have to fix my mistakes.
0:19:04 > 0:19:07There is one thing that might help.
0:19:07 > 0:19:10- Yeah?- A time machine. You could travel back into the past.
0:19:10 > 0:19:13- That way, you get a second chance to answer those phone calls.- How much?
0:19:13 > 0:19:16£100 an hour, plus travel insurance.
0:19:18 > 0:19:20What's to stop me paying you, then going back in time,
0:19:20 > 0:19:23fixing my mistakes, returning five minutes ago,
0:19:23 > 0:19:24before I paid you any money?
0:19:24 > 0:19:26Well, that doesn't sound very sporting.
0:19:26 > 0:19:29And surely the nature of the time machine
0:19:29 > 0:19:32- means it's impossible to charge by the hour?- You're right.
0:19:32 > 0:19:37No wonder I'm losing money! The deal's off.
0:19:37 > 0:19:38Back in five minutes ago?
0:19:43 > 0:19:46KNOCK AT THE DOOR
0:19:52 > 0:19:53Oh, it's you.
0:19:56 > 0:19:58What am I going to do? I barely have two hours to live!
0:19:58 > 0:20:00Look on the bright side!
0:20:00 > 0:20:02There's a nice symmetry to the fact
0:20:02 > 0:20:04that you're going to die on your birthday.
0:20:04 > 0:20:08I know we don't see eye to eye very often. I hate you, and you hate me.
0:20:08 > 0:20:10Is there a point?
0:20:10 > 0:20:13It's only when you're about to lose something
0:20:13 > 0:20:15that you realise what it means to you.
0:20:15 > 0:20:18- I'd put my life on the line if I thought it'd help to save you.- Wow.
0:20:18 > 0:20:20I didn't expect this.
0:20:20 > 0:20:23I suppose death changes people.
0:20:23 > 0:20:27It's changed me. You're my reason for getting up in the morning.
0:20:27 > 0:20:28The one I look to for inspiration.
0:20:28 > 0:20:33Heck, you're my big sister, and no-one harms my big sister.
0:20:33 > 0:20:36I am so sorry I've been so awful to you.
0:20:36 > 0:20:39Is there any way I can make up ten years of bullying in two hours?
0:20:39 > 0:20:41- There's no need.- But, I want to.
0:20:41 > 0:20:43- It's not necessary.- Fine.
0:20:43 > 0:20:46Although, if it would make you feel better...?
0:20:46 > 0:20:48It would, it really would.
0:20:48 > 0:20:52- You could give me all your birthday presents.- All of them?
0:20:52 > 0:20:55- Well, you won't be needing them. - Good point.
0:20:55 > 0:20:57Just sign here, here and here
0:20:57 > 0:21:00to confirm everything you've just promised.
0:21:00 > 0:21:03It's no biggie, just a legally binding contract.
0:21:03 > 0:21:07Nice signature. Love the heart shape over the I.
0:21:07 > 0:21:08Where are you going?
0:21:08 > 0:21:10To do some online DVD shopping.
0:21:10 > 0:21:12Good luck with the assassination plot.
0:21:12 > 0:21:14Those hitmen may be professional,
0:21:14 > 0:21:17but I'm not going down without a fight.
0:21:17 > 0:21:19No-one messes with the birthday girl.
0:21:23 > 0:21:26I'm not sure why you're reacting like this.
0:21:26 > 0:21:28It was supposed to be a nice surprise.
0:21:28 > 0:21:30Nice?! You call it nice?!
0:21:30 > 0:21:32MUFFLED SPEECH
0:21:32 > 0:21:35You want me to stamp on a goblin's tea kettle?
0:21:35 > 0:21:37You see the pressure you've put him under?
0:21:37 > 0:21:39Lighten up! You never know,
0:21:39 > 0:21:42- you might have enjoyed yourself tonight.- You're sick!
0:21:42 > 0:21:45MUFFLED SPEECH
0:21:46 > 0:21:48Oh, that's what you meant.
0:21:48 > 0:21:50Oh! Thank you!
0:21:50 > 0:21:51You're welcome.
0:21:52 > 0:21:54MUFFLED SPEECH
0:21:54 > 0:21:56Oh, shut up, Toby!
0:22:03 > 0:22:06Hello, officer? I'm calling to report a murder.
0:22:06 > 0:22:09My murder! Come immediately.
0:22:14 > 0:22:17So, you admit you were planning on doing this tonight?
0:22:17 > 0:22:20Yes, at six. The guests will be arriving soon.
0:22:20 > 0:22:22You invited guests?
0:22:22 > 0:22:25Yeah, we wanted all our friends to join in.
0:22:26 > 0:22:30This is all your fault! I knew you should never have stolen that dummy.
0:22:30 > 0:22:34Sorry, I didn't think we'd be in trouble with the police, did I?
0:22:34 > 0:22:38The witness said she saw you putting a body in the broom cupboard.
0:22:38 > 0:22:40We were trying to hide him from Dani.
0:22:40 > 0:22:43To be honest, I didn't think anyone would miss him.
0:22:43 > 0:22:46I picked him up off the High Street, outside a clothes store.
0:22:46 > 0:22:49Oh, so you thought he was worthless, yeah?
0:22:49 > 0:22:51Of no value to society?
0:22:51 > 0:22:55Well, yeah. Pretty much.
0:22:55 > 0:22:59For a dummy, he's not even that good-looking.
0:22:59 > 0:23:03- Our witness also claims you hired hitmen.- Yeah, do you know them?
0:23:03 > 0:23:05I hope they do a good job!
0:23:05 > 0:23:08Is there any way we could wrap this up quickly?
0:23:08 > 0:23:10Some fine I can pay?
0:23:10 > 0:23:13Are you trying to bribe an officer of the law?
0:23:13 > 0:23:15THEY LAUGH
0:23:15 > 0:23:18You kids had better start taking this seriously.
0:23:18 > 0:23:19This is a grave charge.
0:23:19 > 0:23:24- You're looking at eight to ten for attempted murder.- Murder?!
0:23:24 > 0:23:27KNOCK AT DOOR
0:23:33 > 0:23:35We're the Professional Hitmen.
0:23:39 > 0:23:40Excited?
0:23:40 > 0:23:43Meeting us can be quite overwhelming. I know the feeling.
0:23:43 > 0:23:45Here, allow me.
0:24:02 > 0:24:04You're meant to be a professional hitman,
0:24:04 > 0:24:06and you've just written your name on the victim.
0:24:06 > 0:24:09Don't you think the crime lab are going to notice that?
0:24:09 > 0:24:10This happens all the time.
0:24:10 > 0:24:12We're going to have to change our name.
0:24:12 > 0:24:14Dani, help!
0:24:14 > 0:24:16Thank you for calling this in, miss.
0:24:16 > 0:24:18In all of my years in policing,
0:24:18 > 0:24:20I have never come across such a pair of sickos.
0:24:20 > 0:24:24Dani, they've arrested us for attempted murder. Just tell him!
0:24:24 > 0:24:25You two have been up to something.
0:24:25 > 0:24:28You're trying to tell me you're innocent?
0:24:28 > 0:24:29Just look in the box.
0:24:37 > 0:24:39How do I know it's not poisoned?
0:24:39 > 0:24:41Open the cupboard if you don't believe us.
0:24:45 > 0:24:48So? Balloons don't prove anything.
0:24:48 > 0:24:51- And what about the hitmen? - They're the band!
0:24:51 > 0:24:53Hey!
0:24:53 > 0:24:56And, see, it's your so-called dead body.
0:25:01 > 0:25:02Oh, that is so sweet.
0:25:02 > 0:25:07So, you guys were planning a surprise party after all?
0:25:07 > 0:25:09Keys, please, before I call my lawyer.
0:25:09 > 0:25:12As this arrest is unlawful, as you don't have enough grounds
0:25:12 > 0:25:14to arrest me under Section 24
0:25:14 > 0:25:16of the Police and Criminal Evidence Act of 1988.
0:25:16 > 0:25:18Yeah, what she said.
0:25:18 > 0:25:21Oops!
0:25:21 > 0:25:24I am so sorry I accused you of plotting my murder.
0:25:24 > 0:25:27Will you forgive me?
0:25:27 > 0:25:29These things happen.
0:25:29 > 0:25:32Happy birthday, Dani. This is a present from all of our friends.
0:25:38 > 0:25:42- Hey!- Ben?
0:25:42 > 0:25:46- All presents are mine, remember? - You knew all about this, didn't you?
0:25:46 > 0:25:48- He blackmailed us.- He manipulated me.
0:25:48 > 0:25:51Ben!
0:25:51 > 0:25:53He treats me like a fool.
0:25:54 > 0:25:58- Everything all right? - I'm fine, really.
0:25:58 > 0:26:01It's just I sympathise with the little guy.
0:26:01 > 0:26:03I know exactly how he feels.
0:26:05 > 0:26:08Guys, I'm so sorry about ruining your phone messages this morning.
0:26:08 > 0:26:10I feel so guilty.
0:26:10 > 0:26:13- There's something I need to tell you.- Us first.
0:26:13 > 0:26:15This morning, it looked like we hadn't done a thing
0:26:15 > 0:26:18- for your birthday, so we forgive you.- You do?
0:26:18 > 0:26:20Everything worked out for the best.
0:26:20 > 0:26:22Who knows where I'll end up after the E-Minors?
0:26:22 > 0:26:24Turns out I got the pay confused.
0:26:24 > 0:26:27The wage at the coffee house wouldn't keep me in hair gel.
0:26:27 > 0:26:30So, what do you want to tell us?
0:26:32 > 0:26:34And that, my friend,
0:26:34 > 0:26:38is how you extort a DVD player from your sister's friends,
0:26:38 > 0:26:40and manipulate her into submission.
0:26:40 > 0:26:42Oh, it's great.
0:26:45 > 0:26:46Everything OK?
0:26:48 > 0:26:49Pink!
0:26:49 > 0:26:53I know, I love pink! And the sparkles make it unique.
0:26:53 > 0:26:56NOOOOOOOOOOO!
0:26:56 > 0:27:00MAX'S VOICE ECHOES
0:27:00 > 0:27:02- Anyway, what did you want to tell us? - Yeah.
0:27:02 > 0:27:04Well, you see, the thing is,
0:27:04 > 0:27:07I called your choir teacher and the coffee house manager earlier,
0:27:07 > 0:27:10and convinced them to change their minds.
0:27:10 > 0:27:12What?!
0:27:12 > 0:27:15Congratulations! You're out of the E-Minors,
0:27:15 > 0:27:18and you start the coffee house on Monday. Yay!
0:27:18 > 0:27:22BOTH: Dani? I'm going to kill you.
0:27:26 > 0:27:29Oh, that was good. I enjoyed that.
0:27:29 > 0:27:31Right, what's next?
0:27:34 > 0:27:37Which one's channel up?
0:27:37 > 0:27:39No, I can do it.
0:27:43 > 0:27:47- Oh, that's not the right button. - Give me that!
0:28:00 > 0:28:03Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:28:03 > 0:28:06Email subtitling@bbc.co.uk