0:00:02 > 0:00:04Another day of floating in space.
0:00:04 > 0:00:09- It's so boring!- In the movies, aliens lead such exciting lives.
0:00:09 > 0:00:10I know!
0:00:10 > 0:00:13- Invading planets.- Melting stuff with their acid blood.
0:00:13 > 0:00:15Flying on BMX bikes.
0:00:15 > 0:00:20BOTH: ET phone home.
0:00:20 > 0:00:25Nothing exciting ever happens to us and it's making me miserable.
0:00:25 > 0:00:27Sounds like you're suffering from SNOT.
0:00:27 > 0:00:29- What's SNOT?- S-N-O-T.
0:00:29 > 0:00:31Sun's not out today syndrome.
0:00:31 > 0:00:33I think you're right,
0:00:33 > 0:00:36but the sun's never out here in deep space.
0:00:36 > 0:00:38It's OK, I can fix it.
0:00:38 > 0:00:41- How?- The sun explosion.
0:00:41 > 0:00:43An instant sun-blast capsule.
0:00:43 > 0:00:45Sun blast?
0:00:45 > 0:00:47Each capsule contains a tiny atom of sunshine.
0:00:47 > 0:00:50You just crack it open and hey presto!
0:00:50 > 0:00:52Fantastic! Just what I needed!
0:00:52 > 0:00:54Wait! First we need to...
0:00:54 > 0:00:55- Aaaargh!- Aaargh!
0:00:58 > 0:00:59..put sun cream on.
0:00:59 > 0:01:03Oh, well. Let's watch an episode of Dani's House. It'll cheer us up.
0:01:03 > 0:01:05Yes, please!
0:01:07 > 0:01:09Hi. My name's Dani
0:01:09 > 0:01:10and this is my fantastic new...
0:01:10 > 0:01:12Best friend, Jack.
0:01:12 > 0:01:14Yeah, but... Oh, where was I?!
0:01:14 > 0:01:16Your name's Dani and I'm her best friend too, Sam.
0:01:16 > 0:01:19As I was saying, this is my fantastic new...
0:01:19 > 0:01:20- Max!- I'm her brother
0:01:20 > 0:01:22and actually it's... Ben?
0:01:22 > 0:01:25What? Oh! It's our sh...
0:01:25 > 0:01:26Can you just zip it?!
0:01:26 > 0:01:30As I was saying, my name's Dani and this is my fantastic new...
0:01:30 > 0:01:32ALL SHOUT AT ONCE
0:01:32 > 0:01:33I give up!
0:01:34 > 0:01:36ALL SHOUT AT ONCE
0:01:38 > 0:01:40DANI SHRIEKS
0:01:40 > 0:01:41It's so exciting!
0:01:41 > 0:01:42What? What?
0:01:42 > 0:01:44My record company just rang.
0:01:44 > 0:01:46I am going to be on TV!
0:01:46 > 0:01:48THEY ALL SHRIEK
0:01:48 > 0:01:50I know! A celebrity chat show!
0:01:50 > 0:01:53Wow, Dani! That's amazing! Which one?
0:01:53 > 0:01:55Oh! The Late Show with Ross Newton?
0:01:55 > 0:01:57The Even Later Show with Jools Dutchman?
0:01:57 > 0:02:00I don't know! I'm waiting for them to call me back.
0:02:00 > 0:02:03I'm going to be on live TV! What am I going to wear?
0:02:03 > 0:02:07Don't worry - we'll sort something out. It's so exciting!
0:02:07 > 0:02:09- I can't wait!- Me neither.- Nor me...
0:02:09 > 0:02:11- neither.- Let's try some outfits on.
0:02:11 > 0:02:13BOTH: Not you!
0:02:13 > 0:02:15Er, my best friend's going to be on TV.
0:02:15 > 0:02:17Do you want my autograph?
0:02:17 > 0:02:18No.
0:02:18 > 0:02:20Well, I do!
0:02:23 > 0:02:24To Jack.
0:02:26 > 0:02:28You're one cool dude.
0:02:28 > 0:02:29Best wishes...
0:02:31 > 0:02:32..Jack.
0:02:33 > 0:02:35- HE CHOKES - What's up?
0:02:35 > 0:02:37Nothing. I thought I heard you say
0:02:37 > 0:02:40you were interested in the school-council elections.
0:02:40 > 0:02:43- I am.- You've never been interested in the school anything!
0:02:43 > 0:02:46This is different. This is politics.
0:02:46 > 0:02:48Politics is power.
0:02:48 > 0:02:50Imagine if we got elected.
0:02:50 > 0:02:53We could change the rules and make school fun
0:02:53 > 0:02:56or even bring about the end of school altogether.
0:02:56 > 0:02:58Max, no-one would vote for you.
0:02:58 > 0:03:00Hang on!
0:03:00 > 0:03:01Did you say "we"?
0:03:01 > 0:03:03I said "we", but what I actually meant is...
0:03:03 > 0:03:04you.
0:03:04 > 0:03:07You're going to stand for the school-council elections
0:03:07 > 0:03:10and I'm going to be your campaign manager.
0:03:10 > 0:03:14- HE CHOKES - I'd rather just eat my biscuits without choking on them.
0:03:14 > 0:03:16Ben, even biscuits are political.
0:03:16 > 0:03:19Garibaldi, the great Italian leader.
0:03:19 > 0:03:21Succeed in this and, who knows,
0:03:21 > 0:03:24you may even have a biscuit named after you.
0:03:24 > 0:03:26Who'd want a biscuit called Ben?
0:03:28 > 0:03:30Yeah. OK, bye.
0:03:31 > 0:03:33- So?- The Late Show?
0:03:33 > 0:03:35The Even Later Show?
0:03:35 > 0:03:39- The Really Late Show that nobody watches cos we're all in bed?- No.
0:03:39 > 0:03:42Early Afternoon with Adam Twittfield.
0:03:42 > 0:03:43Adam Twittfield?
0:03:45 > 0:03:47Isn't he a bit...cheesy?
0:03:49 > 0:03:52APPLAUSE
0:03:52 > 0:03:53So, Dani.
0:03:53 > 0:03:56Welcome to Cheesy Chat.
0:03:56 > 0:04:00Tell me about your latest album. Any cheese-related songs?
0:04:00 > 0:04:04- Why does everything have to be about cheese?- Cos I'm the king of cheese!
0:04:04 > 0:04:06Blue cheese - good or bad?
0:04:06 > 0:04:09Smelly. Please, no more cheese questions.
0:04:09 > 0:04:13- So, any plans to go on tour? - I hope so!
0:04:13 > 0:04:15May I suggest Leicester?
0:04:15 > 0:04:17Gloucester? Cheshire? Caerphilly?
0:04:17 > 0:04:21- Hang on! They're all cheeses. - Oh! So they are.
0:04:21 > 0:04:23- But...- Edam cheese is lovely.
0:04:23 > 0:04:26I love peeling off the red wax skin and making stuff.
0:04:26 > 0:04:30I recently had a pair of cheese-skin shoes made for me.
0:04:30 > 0:04:31Look!
0:04:31 > 0:04:32Lovely(!)
0:04:32 > 0:04:36- Know what's great about cheese-skin shoes?- I'm sure you'll tell me.
0:04:36 > 0:04:38Cheesy feet! Here, have a stink.
0:04:38 > 0:04:40HE LAUGHS
0:04:40 > 0:04:43Ladies and gentlemen, go crazy for my cheesy feet!
0:04:43 > 0:04:45Whoo-hoo!
0:04:45 > 0:04:48This cheese sketch has to stop now.
0:04:50 > 0:04:53Well, I don't care if he's a bit cheesy.
0:04:53 > 0:04:55Yeah. All publicity is good publicity.
0:04:55 > 0:04:58- That's what my record company said. - Twittfield's all right.
0:04:58 > 0:05:01Anyway, once you tell your funny stories, all eyes will be on you.
0:05:01 > 0:05:05- No, no! I'm terrible at telling funny stories.- You're not terrible.
0:05:05 > 0:05:11Well, maybe you are, but...only a teeny bit terrible.
0:05:12 > 0:05:13Help.
0:05:14 > 0:05:16No more biscuits. You've got to
0:05:16 > 0:05:19look like a serious politician to win that election.
0:05:19 > 0:05:20But I like biscuits.
0:05:20 > 0:05:22You do it, it's your idea.
0:05:22 > 0:05:26No! Trust me, you're the public face for this campaign. The front.
0:05:26 > 0:05:29Can't I be the back? It's too confusing.
0:05:29 > 0:05:33If I have to trust you, why can't we ask the voters to trust you too?
0:05:33 > 0:05:36I'm a devious, manipulating, two-faced monster.
0:05:36 > 0:05:39True, whereas I'm a good, kind person with a nice face.
0:05:39 > 0:05:41Maybe I could be a politician.
0:05:41 > 0:05:44Course you could! One of the greatest.
0:05:44 > 0:05:46You wouldn't have to worry about a thing
0:05:46 > 0:05:48cos I'll be guiding you all the way.
0:05:48 > 0:05:50- That's what I'm worried about. - Relax.
0:05:50 > 0:05:52Just think of yourself as a puppet
0:05:52 > 0:05:54and I'm your puppet master.
0:05:54 > 0:05:57I don't like that! Where will you put your hand?
0:05:57 > 0:05:59A string puppet!
0:05:59 > 0:06:00Oh...
0:06:05 > 0:06:06Boys and girls,
0:06:06 > 0:06:09allow me to introduce my puppet friend -
0:06:09 > 0:06:11Little Ben.
0:06:16 > 0:06:18# See the puppet dance
0:06:18 > 0:06:21# See the puppet run
0:06:21 > 0:06:22# See the puppet walk
0:06:22 > 0:06:25# And reach up to the sun
0:06:25 > 0:06:27# See the puppet skip
0:06:27 > 0:06:29# See him hop and jump
0:06:29 > 0:06:31# See poor puppet trip
0:06:31 > 0:06:34# And fall down with a bump. #
0:06:34 > 0:06:35Oi! Be careful!
0:06:35 > 0:06:37You might chip my paint.
0:06:38 > 0:06:40And now, ladies and gentlemen,
0:06:40 > 0:06:43Little Ben will perform a triple somersault!
0:06:43 > 0:06:44Noooo!
0:06:44 > 0:06:48No, no, no, no, no!
0:06:51 > 0:06:54Come on, you must have some funny stories to tell.
0:06:54 > 0:06:57Once in school, I called my teacher Mum by accident.
0:06:57 > 0:07:00- HE LAUGHS - Good start. Then what happened?
0:07:00 > 0:07:01- That's it.- Oh.
0:07:01 > 0:07:03- Any others?- Er, yeah.
0:07:03 > 0:07:06- What?- Ooh, right, you'll love this one.
0:07:06 > 0:07:08The other day, I caught the wrong bus into town
0:07:08 > 0:07:11and I had to get off and catch the number 38,
0:07:11 > 0:07:12but that didn't turn up,
0:07:12 > 0:07:15so I had to get the number 72 and then walk from the library!
0:07:19 > 0:07:22Er... Hey, you can always use some gags from my DJ routine.
0:07:22 > 0:07:26Jack, your last gig was a birthday party for five-year-olds.
0:07:27 > 0:07:29Five-year-olds are a very tough audience.
0:07:29 > 0:07:33You have to win them over with highly sophisticated humour
0:07:33 > 0:07:35- and...- Packets of crisps.
0:07:35 > 0:07:38Don't worry. I've just remembered this classic.
0:07:38 > 0:07:39The other week,
0:07:39 > 0:07:41I ordered burger and chips from the cafe
0:07:41 > 0:07:44and they brought me a sausage by mistake!
0:07:46 > 0:07:49- My life isn't interesting at all, is it?- Yes, it is.
0:07:49 > 0:07:50Sometimes.
0:07:50 > 0:07:54I've had it! I give up! I'm a failure and I'm useless!
0:07:54 > 0:07:57No, that's Jack. You're going to be fine.
0:08:02 > 0:08:05A suit and tie? It's only the school-council election.
0:08:05 > 0:08:08School council today, tomorrow...prime minister.
0:08:08 > 0:08:11OK. What about my hair? Do I look like a geek?
0:08:11 > 0:08:15You always look like a geek, but now you also look like a politician.
0:08:15 > 0:08:18You mean I now look intelligent and charismatic.
0:08:18 > 0:08:21Sure...but it's not just about how you look.
0:08:21 > 0:08:24You must also walk and talk like a politician.
0:08:25 > 0:08:26Say something.
0:08:28 > 0:08:30OK. Er, vote for me!
0:08:30 > 0:08:32No.
0:08:32 > 0:08:34- Don't vote for me!- No!
0:08:34 > 0:08:35Vote for someone else!
0:08:35 > 0:08:37No! You want them to vote for you.
0:08:37 > 0:08:39Make your mind up!
0:08:39 > 0:08:41You've got to make them WANT to vote for you.
0:08:41 > 0:08:44- How do I do that?- Tell them what you believe in.
0:08:44 > 0:08:45OK.
0:08:45 > 0:08:46Father Christmas,
0:08:46 > 0:08:49the tooth fairy and the man in the moon.
0:08:49 > 0:08:50I see I've got some work to do here.
0:08:50 > 0:08:53Cross your eyes when the wind changes, you'll stay like that.
0:08:53 > 0:08:55Are you doing this on purpose?
0:08:55 > 0:08:57Yes. Can we give up now?
0:08:57 > 0:09:01No! No U-turns, it's time to work on your campaign speech.
0:09:07 > 0:09:08Ta-da!
0:09:08 > 0:09:09Dani!
0:09:09 > 0:09:11So, what do you think?
0:09:11 > 0:09:13You look incredible.
0:09:13 > 0:09:15- Really? - Never mind the funny stories.
0:09:15 > 0:09:18- They'll be so knocked out, they won't hear a word.- Honestly?
0:09:20 > 0:09:21Where's Dani?
0:09:24 > 0:09:26- Oh.- Jack! That's not exactly helpful!
0:09:26 > 0:09:29I'm only kidding. Aw, you look great, Dani.
0:09:29 > 0:09:31No, I don't. I look ridiculous.
0:09:32 > 0:09:36There must be something I can do to make me stand out on this chat show.
0:09:37 > 0:09:38- Hang on - I've got it!- What?
0:09:38 > 0:09:40I'll reveal my hidden talent.
0:09:40 > 0:09:43- Great! I didn't know you had a hidden talent.- Nor did I.
0:09:43 > 0:09:47- Because it's hidden. It wouldn't be a hidden talent otherwise.- Yeah.
0:09:47 > 0:09:49- What is it?- It's still pretty hidden at the moment.
0:09:49 > 0:09:53- You mean you haven't got one.- I have! I just can't remember what it is.
0:09:53 > 0:09:56- OK...- Something I used to do when I was little.
0:09:56 > 0:09:57Wear nappies?
0:09:57 > 0:10:00No! That's not a talent! Something my auntie taught me.
0:10:00 > 0:10:03- Which auntie? - Auntie Marie from Brazil.
0:10:03 > 0:10:04You have a Brazilian auntie?
0:10:04 > 0:10:07She's from Stoke, but she married a nut farmer.
0:10:07 > 0:10:08And?
0:10:08 > 0:10:09She taught me...
0:10:09 > 0:10:13- Nut farming?- No, she taught me...
0:10:13 > 0:10:14Come on, come on!
0:10:14 > 0:10:15..the art of capoeira!
0:10:15 > 0:10:17What?
0:10:17 > 0:10:21It's an African-Brazilian art form. It combines dance and martial arts.
0:10:21 > 0:10:22Wow! You can do that?
0:10:22 > 0:10:24Well, I could when I was seven.
0:10:24 > 0:10:26Let's see then.
0:10:26 > 0:10:28Cool! I'll just get my bongos out.
0:10:30 > 0:10:32Get ready to see my hidden talents.
0:10:32 > 0:10:34Hit the bongos, Jack! It's capoeira time!
0:10:54 > 0:10:56Ow!
0:10:59 > 0:11:00So, what do you think?
0:11:02 > 0:11:03BOTH: Great.
0:11:03 > 0:11:06Wait until you see my how-oo-oo-ooh!
0:11:07 > 0:11:10OK. Is that a good thing?
0:11:10 > 0:11:13Very tricky move. It'll blow Adam Twittfield away.
0:11:14 > 0:11:16THEY LAUGH NERVOUSLY
0:11:18 > 0:11:20Ladies and gentlemen,
0:11:20 > 0:11:22soft cuddly things and action heroes,
0:11:22 > 0:11:27may I present councillor-elect Ben.
0:11:30 > 0:11:33FAB! Thunderbirds are go!
0:11:33 > 0:11:36- OK, drop the puppet thing.- Sorry.
0:11:36 > 0:11:38Er... V-V-Vote for me!
0:11:40 > 0:11:45Sorry. Vote for me and I promise you something in return.
0:11:45 > 0:11:46Pizza and sweets.
0:11:46 > 0:11:50I promise school dinners will be scrapped.
0:11:50 > 0:11:53Instead, there will be free pizza and sweets for all.
0:11:53 > 0:11:55Good. Now make it personal, remember.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57Right.
0:11:57 > 0:12:00Em, I like to pick my nose when I'm on the toilet.
0:12:01 > 0:12:02No, personal to them!
0:12:02 > 0:12:07Oh, yeah. "And what else?" I hear you ask, Mr Instructo Man.
0:12:07 > 0:12:09- Well, I'll tell you. - That's it. Great.
0:12:09 > 0:12:12And you Fluffy Floppy.
0:12:12 > 0:12:15Detentions will also be scrapped in favour of unlimited access
0:12:15 > 0:12:19to school computers for games, Internet and other fun stuff.
0:12:19 > 0:12:20That's my boy!
0:12:25 > 0:12:28Coordinator Zarg! The post has arrived!
0:12:30 > 0:12:32Ah. Ooh. Er.
0:12:32 > 0:12:33How do we...? Em.
0:12:39 > 0:12:40What is it?
0:12:40 > 0:12:43It's election time for intergalactic parliament.
0:12:43 > 0:12:46This is the ballot paper with all the candidates on it.
0:12:46 > 0:12:49Very important. Who are you going to vote for?
0:12:49 > 0:12:51I don't know. President Nimbob had to go
0:12:51 > 0:12:53in light of the recent scandal.
0:12:53 > 0:12:56Claiming he was using our money to study the rings of Saturn.
0:12:56 > 0:12:58When all he was doing was buying doughnuts.
0:12:58 > 0:13:00- He had to go.- Had to go.
0:13:00 > 0:13:02- Who are the other candidates? - Let's see.
0:13:05 > 0:13:07How many candidates are there?
0:13:07 > 0:13:09- Just the two.- Two?!
0:13:09 > 0:13:11Very long names.
0:13:16 > 0:13:18Dani can't do the capoeira to save her life.
0:13:18 > 0:13:21If she does that on TV, she'll be a laughing stock.
0:13:21 > 0:13:22That's not my fault!
0:13:22 > 0:13:26- You said her stories weren't funny! - I was trying to help her prepare.
0:13:26 > 0:13:29I didn't know she'd get so nervous and panic.
0:13:29 > 0:13:32Doing capoeira, we're lucky she didn't fly out the window!
0:13:32 > 0:13:34- We've got to stop her. - Don't worry, I've got a plan.
0:13:34 > 0:13:38Coming from you, that's like saying, "Cheer up, we're all going to die."
0:13:38 > 0:13:42No, really. I thought I'd make a behind-the-scenes video of Dani
0:13:42 > 0:13:43- to make her look exciting.- Great.
0:13:43 > 0:13:46Dani catches a bus, Dani eats a sausage...
0:13:46 > 0:13:48No, just the highlights. No boring stuff.
0:13:48 > 0:13:49I'll direct it.
0:13:49 > 0:13:52Pacey with crazy camera angles.
0:13:52 > 0:13:53Fast, snazzy graphics.
0:13:53 > 0:13:55Sharp editing. Whip pans.
0:13:55 > 0:13:57What are whip pans?
0:13:57 > 0:13:58Like this.
0:14:01 > 0:14:04- OK, it's a good idea, but... - Trust me - it'll work.
0:14:04 > 0:14:06Well, it's worth a try, I suppose.
0:14:06 > 0:14:08Brilliant. I'm onto it.
0:14:08 > 0:14:11Great. What could possibly go wrong(?)
0:14:11 > 0:14:13Look, I've told you -
0:14:13 > 0:14:17free sweets and pizza, that's all they want to hear.
0:14:17 > 0:14:18Sorry, but they don't sound like
0:14:18 > 0:14:22the promises of an honest and decent politician. I won't do it!
0:14:22 > 0:14:25Don't stop now. You've got them in the palm of your hand. Look!
0:14:25 > 0:14:27Lizardhead loves you.
0:14:27 > 0:14:30Lizardhead doesn't go to our school. I'll never achieve all that.
0:14:30 > 0:14:33- I won't make promises I can't deliver.- Rubbish!
0:14:33 > 0:14:37It's getting me elect... I mean, getting YOU elected that counts.
0:14:37 > 0:14:40After that, who cares?
0:14:40 > 0:14:42Me! I must be transparent in everything I do.
0:14:42 > 0:14:45You're not the invisible man. Just do what I say.
0:14:45 > 0:14:48If I betray my people, I'll get the blame, not you.
0:14:48 > 0:14:50What are you talking about?
0:14:50 > 0:14:53I'll be chased round the playground by an angry mob.
0:14:53 > 0:14:55So? What's new?
0:14:55 > 0:14:56Look, Ben,
0:14:56 > 0:14:58trust me - just make the speech.
0:14:58 > 0:15:01- No!- No? What do you mean, no?
0:15:02 > 0:15:05You can't say no to me! I'm your puppet master.
0:15:05 > 0:15:06Not any more, Max.
0:15:06 > 0:15:09I stand for everything that is good in the world.
0:15:09 > 0:15:12You, Max, stand for everything that is rotten.
0:15:13 > 0:15:15I can make a difference, Max.
0:15:15 > 0:15:17I'm going it alone.
0:15:20 > 0:15:23# See the puppet swing from side to side... #
0:15:25 > 0:15:27Oi! Watch the paintwork, sunshine!
0:15:27 > 0:15:31# ..See him on his bottom slide... #
0:15:31 > 0:15:33Aaargh!
0:15:35 > 0:15:38# ..See him bump and see him bob... #
0:15:39 > 0:15:41Hey! What did I just say?
0:15:41 > 0:15:43Just be careful, will you?
0:15:43 > 0:15:45Aaargh!
0:15:45 > 0:15:48# ..And see him running from the mob. #
0:15:48 > 0:15:51That's it! I've had enough of this!
0:15:54 > 0:15:56- No!- Ha! I'm free!
0:15:56 > 0:15:59- I've got no strings to hold me up. - What are you doing?
0:15:59 > 0:16:03I'm the puppet master. You can't give a speech without me!
0:16:03 > 0:16:05Oh, really? Just watch!
0:16:05 > 0:16:07Deserter!
0:16:07 > 0:16:10You'll regret this, puppet boy!
0:16:17 > 0:16:19Look at the time. The car will be here any minute.
0:16:19 > 0:16:21I hope I've got everything!
0:16:21 > 0:16:23You look great and you don't need anything.
0:16:26 > 0:16:29- How did you get on with the DVD? - All done, no problemo.
0:16:29 > 0:16:30It had better be good!
0:16:30 > 0:16:33Relax! I called upon all my film-directing experience
0:16:33 > 0:16:35to produce the perfect promo.
0:16:35 > 0:16:38You're not a director, you're a children's DJ.
0:16:38 > 0:16:39Just watch and see.
0:16:40 > 0:16:42SHE GASPS
0:16:42 > 0:16:43Car's here! I've got to go.
0:16:45 > 0:16:49- Aren't you going to wish me luck? - Dani! Sorry. Good luck.
0:16:49 > 0:16:51(What have you done?!)
0:16:51 > 0:16:53- Just a bit of artistic licence. - What's that?
0:16:53 > 0:16:56- Nothing.- A DVD I put together about your life.
0:16:56 > 0:16:58It's wicked. Makes you look really cool.
0:16:58 > 0:17:00You could use it on your show.
0:17:00 > 0:17:02Thanks, Jack, that's really sweet.
0:17:02 > 0:17:05- I think you should watch it first. - Haven't got time.
0:17:05 > 0:17:07Thanks, Jack, you saved my life. Bye, Sam.
0:17:07 > 0:17:10Bye.
0:17:11 > 0:17:13Please, Ben, don't do this.
0:17:13 > 0:17:17Sorry, Max. I have a duty to myself and my voters to tell the truth.
0:17:17 > 0:17:20You can't tell the truth, you're a politician!
0:17:20 > 0:17:22Yeah, there are loads of honest and decent politicians.
0:17:22 > 0:17:24Rubbish! You're so naive.
0:17:24 > 0:17:27You need to be sneaky, you need to be cunning, you need to be...
0:17:27 > 0:17:29- Like you?- Exactly.
0:17:29 > 0:17:30We are the world, Max.
0:17:30 > 0:17:33We are the children. We are the ones who make a brighter day.
0:17:33 > 0:17:36- Give me a break.- Sorry, Max.
0:17:39 > 0:17:42My people, I stand before you,
0:17:42 > 0:17:44humbled by the enormous task that lies ahead.
0:17:44 > 0:17:47- Get on with it!- Oh, erm...
0:17:47 > 0:17:52It is with utter determination that I promise, if elected,
0:17:52 > 0:17:55I will reduce the school's carbon footprint.
0:17:55 > 0:17:58- How about reducing the number of lessons?- Yeah!
0:17:58 > 0:18:01A famous president once said, "Yes, we can."
0:18:01 > 0:18:03Well, I say, "Yes, we can."
0:18:03 > 0:18:05That's just the same!
0:18:05 > 0:18:09I mean, yes, I do... Yes, we do, can do...
0:18:09 > 0:18:11- do that.- He said "do-do"!
0:18:11 > 0:18:13CROWD LAUGHS
0:18:13 > 0:18:16Anyone who reduces their carbon footprint by the end of the year
0:18:16 > 0:18:18will get free pizza and sweets.
0:18:18 > 0:18:20Just give us the sweets now!
0:18:20 > 0:18:23- Yes!- You have to reduce your carbon footprint first.
0:18:23 > 0:18:26- THEY CHANT: What do we want? - Free sweets!- When do we want them?
0:18:26 > 0:18:29- Now!- Slightly sucked sweet, anyone?
0:18:29 > 0:18:30Get off!
0:18:33 > 0:18:37So I said to the waiter, "Excuse me, but these bread sticks are tiny
0:18:37 > 0:18:38"and very stale."
0:18:38 > 0:18:40The waiter looked at me and he said,
0:18:40 > 0:18:43"But, sir, they aren't bread sticks, they're toothpicks!"
0:18:43 > 0:18:46Oh, I nearly crawled under the table.
0:18:46 > 0:18:47APPLAUSE
0:18:47 > 0:18:50- Give me a "hello". - Erm, hello, hello.
0:18:50 > 0:18:52Now then, ladies and gentlemen,
0:18:52 > 0:18:54shall I bring my next guest out?
0:18:54 > 0:18:57- AUDIENCE: Yes!- Me?
0:18:57 > 0:19:00- Well, she's a very talented young lady...- Oh, here we go.
0:19:00 > 0:19:02Dani's big moment, there's no turning back now.
0:19:02 > 0:19:04Don't, I'm really nervous for her.
0:19:04 > 0:19:07- Why? She's got my DVD.- Exactly.
0:19:07 > 0:19:10She acts and she sings. So please give a warm afternoon welcome
0:19:10 > 0:19:12for Dani!
0:19:12 > 0:19:14- Ooh, Dani!- Yeah, he just said that. - Shh!
0:19:14 > 0:19:18APPLAUSE
0:19:22 > 0:19:24Well, welcome to the show, Dani.
0:19:24 > 0:19:27Hey, do you know I'm a singer too?
0:19:27 > 0:19:30- No, I didn't.- Oh, yeah, I've got an amazing singing voice.
0:19:30 > 0:19:31HE CLEARS HIS THROAT
0:19:31 > 0:19:32Did you know that?
0:19:32 > 0:19:36# It's not unusual to be loved by anyone
0:19:36 > 0:19:39# It's not unusual to have fun with anyone
0:19:39 > 0:19:42# But when I see you hanging around with anyone
0:19:42 > 0:19:46# It's not unusual to see me cry
0:19:46 > 0:19:48# I wanna die... #
0:19:48 > 0:19:50APPLAUSE
0:19:51 > 0:19:53That's very impressive.
0:19:53 > 0:19:56Thanks very much. I was voted best singer in my own shower...
0:19:56 > 0:19:58by me!
0:19:58 > 0:19:59THEY LAUGH
0:19:59 > 0:20:03But I wasn't so impressed with my local cafe.
0:20:03 > 0:20:07Oh...really? Why not?
0:20:07 > 0:20:09Well, I ordered a burger and chips,
0:20:09 > 0:20:11but they brought me a sausage by mistake.
0:20:11 > 0:20:14HE LAUGHS LOUDLY
0:20:14 > 0:20:15Erm, right...
0:20:15 > 0:20:21The last time I ordered a hamburger, the waiter said, "With relish?"
0:20:21 > 0:20:24So I said, "I'd like a lovely juicy burger, please!"
0:20:24 > 0:20:27LAUGHTER
0:20:27 > 0:20:30So, I ended up with a sausage I hadn't ordered.
0:20:30 > 0:20:32It was really funny.
0:20:34 > 0:20:36Erm...right.
0:20:36 > 0:20:39Well, Dani, you have a wonderful singing voice.
0:20:39 > 0:20:43Does that come from hours of singing lessons and vocal training?
0:20:43 > 0:20:45Well, I've had some great teachers.
0:20:45 > 0:20:48Oh, actually, once I called my teacher "Mum" by mistake.
0:20:53 > 0:20:55Yeah...erm...
0:20:55 > 0:20:57That's a bit like...
0:20:59 > 0:21:00Sorry, you've lost me.
0:21:04 > 0:21:06OK, well, Dani,
0:21:06 > 0:21:09apart from singing, do you have any other talents?
0:21:09 > 0:21:12Well, Adam, can you play the bongos?
0:21:12 > 0:21:14As a matter of fact, I can.
0:21:14 > 0:21:17Great, then I can demonstrate my Capoeira moves.
0:21:18 > 0:21:20I'll get my bongos out.
0:21:20 > 0:21:22- No!- No!
0:21:22 > 0:21:24AUDIENCE CLAPS IN RHYTHM
0:21:24 > 0:21:27Watch out for my ow-ow-ow. Awesome.
0:21:33 > 0:21:35- Ow!- Oh!
0:21:36 > 0:21:39I am so, so sorry.
0:21:39 > 0:21:42It's OK. There's nothing broken...
0:21:42 > 0:21:43I hope.
0:21:43 > 0:21:46OK, well...
0:21:46 > 0:21:48thanks, Dani. That just about wraps it up for today.
0:21:48 > 0:21:50- APPLAUSE - No, no, wait!
0:21:50 > 0:21:51I haven't shown you my video.
0:21:51 > 0:21:55It's an exclusive behind-the-scenes look at how exciting my life is.
0:21:55 > 0:21:57If I play it, do you promise
0:21:57 > 0:22:00that you won't demonstrate any more Capoeira moves?
0:22:00 > 0:22:02Definitely.
0:22:02 > 0:22:06In that case, I think we have just enough time to take a look.
0:22:06 > 0:22:07- APPLAUSE - (Sorry.)
0:22:10 > 0:22:11Roll VT.
0:22:11 > 0:22:12- Yes!- No!
0:22:14 > 0:22:17I've lived an exciting and adventurous life.
0:22:17 > 0:22:21Swimming with dolphins? Forget it. I've surfed with polar bears.
0:22:21 > 0:22:24Oh!
0:22:24 > 0:22:27I've won the Nobel Peace Prize.
0:22:27 > 0:22:30And I've flown to the moon.
0:22:32 > 0:22:36While I became the first woman to perform in space.
0:22:36 > 0:22:37But despite all my adventures,
0:22:37 > 0:22:42I'm just a down-to-earth kind of girl who loves ice cream. Yum!
0:22:42 > 0:22:46OK, maybe I went a bit too far with the ice cream.
0:22:47 > 0:22:49Fascinating(!)
0:22:50 > 0:22:53No, it wasn't. It was terrible.
0:22:53 > 0:22:56Look, I'm sorry. The documentary was a fake.
0:22:56 > 0:22:58I had my suspicions.
0:22:59 > 0:23:03- I thought I wouldn't be a very interesting guest.- Why?
0:23:03 > 0:23:06Sounds stupid, I know, but, I guess I was...
0:23:06 > 0:23:09Well, I guess I was afraid to be myself.
0:23:09 > 0:23:12That's very sweet. I like guests with a bit of honesty.
0:23:12 > 0:23:13Thank you.
0:23:13 > 0:23:14Aw!
0:23:14 > 0:23:17And hey, I'll let you into a little secret.
0:23:17 > 0:23:20Even I worry sometimes, that I'm not a great singer.
0:23:20 > 0:23:23Or even a bit cheesy.
0:23:23 > 0:23:25It's a nonsense, I know.
0:23:25 > 0:23:28# It's not unusual to be loved by anyone... #
0:23:28 > 0:23:31You see, I'm a genius. All-round entertainer.
0:23:31 > 0:23:33But hey, we all worry sometimes.
0:23:33 > 0:23:37So tell me, who's the real Dani, eh?
0:23:37 > 0:23:39Well, I really am a singer.
0:23:39 > 0:23:41I love singing and that's why I came on the show.
0:23:41 > 0:23:44- So that everyone could hear my song. - I'm a big fan.
0:23:44 > 0:23:47So get over there, be yourself and sing.
0:23:48 > 0:23:52Hey, if you're lucky I might even join you for a duet.
0:23:53 > 0:23:56Ladies and gentlemen, Dani!
0:23:56 > 0:23:59Oh, I like this song.
0:23:59 > 0:24:01# Yeah
0:24:01 > 0:24:03# Love is like a game to me
0:24:05 > 0:24:08# Playing by the rules but never will
0:24:08 > 0:24:11# I'm missing all the mystery... #
0:24:11 > 0:24:13- She's so good.- So pretty.
0:24:13 > 0:24:15# The way we used to feel
0:24:17 > 0:24:20# So let's pretend
0:24:20 > 0:24:22# We're strangers again
0:24:22 > 0:24:27# If you were my ex-boyfriend
0:24:27 > 0:24:30# I'd see you... AUDIENCE LAUGHS
0:24:30 > 0:24:33# I know that you remember when... #
0:24:33 > 0:24:35HE LAUGHS
0:24:35 > 0:24:37- That is worse than her Capoeira. - No, it's not.
0:24:37 > 0:24:39# Sometimes
0:24:39 > 0:24:45# I just can't help wonder
0:24:45 > 0:24:49# What it would be like if for just tonight
0:24:49 > 0:24:52# We could fall in love again
0:24:52 > 0:24:56# If you were my ex-boyfriend... #
0:24:58 > 0:25:01I thought the voters were really going to turn on us.
0:25:01 > 0:25:04Thank goodness you offered to buy them all a packet of crisps.
0:25:04 > 0:25:07I spent the last of my pocket money on those.
0:25:07 > 0:25:10- We were lucky the head showed up. - Huh!
0:25:10 > 0:25:11She was so impressed, she wants
0:25:11 > 0:25:15to introduce my carbon footprint reduction scheme in school.
0:25:15 > 0:25:18Yippee(!) Does that mean we won?
0:25:18 > 0:25:19No, we lost.
0:25:19 > 0:25:23They voted for the guy with the cool hair, bare chest and a six-pack.
0:25:23 > 0:25:26Call me old-fashioned, but politicians should wear shirts.
0:25:27 > 0:25:29At least we gave it a shot.
0:25:29 > 0:25:30Oh, the head also said,
0:25:30 > 0:25:33"Bribing voters with sweets is strictly forbidden.
0:25:33 > 0:25:36"You've both got Saturday detention for the rest of the term."
0:25:36 > 0:25:39- Isn't that great? - What, are you crazy?
0:25:39 > 0:25:42Picking up litter on a Saturday will improve the environment.
0:25:42 > 0:25:46Oh, well, really, Mr Goody-Two-Shoes?
0:25:46 > 0:25:48You can start practising right now.
0:25:52 > 0:25:54CHEERING
0:25:56 > 0:25:59- You were amazing, Dani, well done. - Yes, you were wicked.- Thanks, guys.
0:25:59 > 0:26:01I couldn't have done it without you.
0:26:01 > 0:26:05- But you could've done it without Jack's dodgy DVD.- Yes, sorry.
0:26:05 > 0:26:07Forget it. Your DVD was that terrible,
0:26:07 > 0:26:10- everyone forgot about the awful Capoeira moves.- We haven't!
0:26:10 > 0:26:13Here, I never want to see your bongos again.
0:26:13 > 0:26:16Don't know why I thought I needed all that stuff.
0:26:16 > 0:26:17All I had to do was be myself.
0:26:17 > 0:26:21Whatever happens, you should always try and be yourself.
0:26:21 > 0:26:24- Except in your case, Jack.- Why?
0:26:24 > 0:26:27Most of the time, we wish you were someone else.
0:26:27 > 0:26:28Aah!
0:26:33 > 0:26:34Great show!
0:26:34 > 0:26:37Yes, and it helped me decide who to vote for
0:26:37 > 0:26:38in the intergalactic elections.
0:26:38 > 0:26:41Oh, so who got your tick?
0:26:41 > 0:26:43Tick? I put a cross.
0:26:43 > 0:26:45We don't cross, we tick.
0:26:45 > 0:26:48If you put a cross, the candidates think you're sending them a kiss.
0:26:48 > 0:26:51Oh well, at least it counts.
0:26:52 > 0:26:55SPACE PHONE BEEPS
0:26:56 > 0:26:58Hello.
0:26:58 > 0:27:00Yes.
0:27:00 > 0:27:03Oh, no, I didn't mean it. I meant that...
0:27:04 > 0:27:07The Astrogalactic Bar? Half seven?
0:27:07 > 0:27:09A date?
0:27:10 > 0:27:13You'll be wearing a red rose. OK.
0:27:13 > 0:27:15See you there.
0:27:19 > 0:27:22- No? - Seems a kiss went down very well!
0:27:22 > 0:27:24Get him to agree to free sweets for all!
0:27:24 > 0:27:31# Sometimes I feel like breaking free
0:27:31 > 0:27:32# Let's lift these chains
0:27:32 > 0:27:38# Let's rock this wave right out to sea
0:27:38 > 0:27:44# I will be breaking free. #