0:00:02 > 0:00:04Ah! Co-ordinator Zarg!
0:00:04 > 0:00:06You're just in time to see Dani's House.
0:00:06 > 0:00:09There'll be Dani's House this week, Co-ordinator.
0:00:09 > 0:00:11Control have assigned you a new task.
0:00:11 > 0:00:13What task?
0:00:13 > 0:00:17They want you to learn about the role of the parent.
0:00:17 > 0:00:18Behold.
0:00:18 > 0:00:21Human eggs. The babies will think I'm their mother.
0:00:21 > 0:00:25They'll bond with me, grow up and ask me for pocket money.
0:00:25 > 0:00:27Co-ordinator, humans don't come from eggs.
0:00:27 > 0:00:31- Then what are those? - These are ordinary eggs
0:00:31 > 0:00:35from an earth chicken bird. You're going to incubate them.
0:00:35 > 0:00:39You want me to sit on a load of eggs until they hatch?
0:00:39 > 0:00:41Control's orders, Co-ordinator.
0:00:41 > 0:00:43Just be very careful.
0:00:43 > 0:00:45Those eggs are fra...
0:00:45 > 0:00:47CRUNCH!
0:00:47 > 0:00:52- ..gile. - I might have broken one or two.
0:00:53 > 0:00:55Or all of them.
0:01:00 > 0:01:05- Hi. My name's Dani, and this is my fantastic new..- ..best friend, Jack.
0:01:05 > 0:01:07Yeah, but... Oh, where was I?
0:01:07 > 0:01:10Your name's Dani, and I'm your best friend too, Sam.
0:01:10 > 0:01:13As I was saying, this is my fantastic new... Max!
0:01:13 > 0:01:15I'm her brother, and actually, it's... Ben?
0:01:15 > 0:01:18- What?! It's- our- show...
0:01:18 > 0:01:19Can you just lip it?!
0:01:19 > 0:01:24As I was saying, my name's Dani, and this is my fantastic new...
0:01:24 > 0:01:27I give up!
0:01:39 > 0:01:43- Yes?- I've never seen anyone make so much mess eating a sandwich.
0:01:43 > 0:01:47- It's my lunch!- The reason Dani let me set up my chemistry lab here
0:01:47 > 0:01:50was that I can do my coursework in peace,
0:01:50 > 0:01:53and now your revolting eating is putting me off.
0:01:53 > 0:01:55OK, OK, fine. I won't eat another thing.
0:01:55 > 0:01:58- I'll just quietly sip my milk. - Thank you.
0:01:58 > 0:02:01GURGLES LOUDLY
0:02:01 > 0:02:04- I can't believe it. - Why, what's happened?
0:02:04 > 0:02:06That was Brandon Noir's manager.
0:02:06 > 0:02:09THE Brandon Noir's manager?
0:02:09 > 0:02:11Brandon's heard my demo, loves it
0:02:11 > 0:02:15and is coming over to discuss us collaborating on a duet!
0:02:15 > 0:02:18I can't believe he likes my music!
0:02:18 > 0:02:22- Mmm!- He likes my music! - Dani, that's massive news!
0:02:22 > 0:02:24News this big can generate its own gravity field.
0:02:24 > 0:02:27- Always with the science! - He's such a tortured poet,
0:02:27 > 0:02:29an enigma, a visionary.
0:02:29 > 0:02:31And the most whingeing pop star ever.
0:02:31 > 0:02:33"Oh, woe is me!
0:02:33 > 0:02:35"I'm rich, talented, successful and handsome."
0:02:35 > 0:02:40- I don't know what you see in him. - He's sensitive and thoughtful,
0:02:40 > 0:02:43and he made the best album of last year.
0:02:43 > 0:02:45Why do you always go for the weirdos?
0:02:45 > 0:02:47I'm a big fan, too, as it happens.
0:02:47 > 0:02:49Er, since when were you into music?
0:02:49 > 0:02:51I'm not into his music,
0:02:51 > 0:02:54- just Brandon.- Brandon's just so...
0:02:54 > 0:02:57..so gorgeous!
0:03:01 > 0:03:05# My mother served me sausages
0:03:05 > 0:03:09# Served them for my tea
0:03:11 > 0:03:15# She knows that I don't like them
0:03:15 > 0:03:18# Cos they don't agree with me
0:03:27 > 0:03:31# She doesn't consider my feelings
0:03:31 > 0:03:36# She does not know who I am
0:03:36 > 0:03:40# But I'm the guy who hates sausages
0:03:40 > 0:03:45# From my plate or in the pan
0:03:53 > 0:03:57# I hate sausages, I hate sausages
0:03:57 > 0:04:01# Why doesn't anything else rhyme with "sausages"
0:04:01 > 0:04:06# Except "sausages"? #
0:04:09 > 0:04:12He wants to duet on a romantic ballad.
0:04:12 > 0:04:16Oh, I can just picture us now, standing behind microphones,
0:04:16 > 0:04:18gazing into each other's eyes and singing about love.
0:04:18 > 0:04:20Ooh, who knows what might happen?
0:04:20 > 0:04:22Just don't be too needy.
0:04:22 > 0:04:25- Play it cool.- Oh, I will be so cool.
0:04:25 > 0:04:27Brandon will need an ice pick to get anywhere near me.
0:04:27 > 0:04:31Are you actually hoping that Brandon Noir might fancy you?
0:04:31 > 0:04:33Stranger things have happened.
0:04:33 > 0:04:35Somebody sounds jealous.
0:04:35 > 0:04:38Why would I be jealous of that coffin botherer?
0:04:38 > 0:04:40I just think he's a dilbert.
0:04:40 > 0:04:42Aw, is Jack jealous?
0:04:42 > 0:04:45Does poor ickle Jacky feel jealous?
0:04:45 > 0:04:49I just don't want you falling for some shallow, pampered pop star.
0:04:49 > 0:04:52You could end up making a fool out of yourself.
0:04:52 > 0:04:54- I love it when Dani makes a fool of herself.- Max!
0:04:54 > 0:04:56What are you doing behind there?
0:04:56 > 0:05:00Eavesdropping. What's this about Dani making a fool of herself?
0:05:00 > 0:05:02Dani has a date with Brandon Noir.
0:05:02 > 0:05:06- Don't tell him!- Why would someone as famous and as successful as
0:05:06 > 0:05:11- Brandon Noir be bothered by someone as ordinary as you?- Well, because...
0:05:11 > 0:05:13..because... ..because he's going
0:05:13 > 0:05:17to take one look at me and think I'm so not cool.
0:05:17 > 0:05:21I can't meet the King of the Emos dressed like this.
0:05:21 > 0:05:23You're going to have to help me.
0:05:23 > 0:05:27I mean, have you seen these celeb gossip mags?
0:05:27 > 0:05:30That lavender-scented goth has a history of breaking girls' hearts.
0:05:30 > 0:05:33I'm afraid I only read Evil Genius Monthly.
0:05:33 > 0:05:35This month's issue comes with
0:05:35 > 0:05:37a pull-out guide to blowing up the moon.
0:05:37 > 0:05:39Brandon's been out with more girls than I've...
0:05:39 > 0:05:41Well, than I have.
0:05:41 > 0:05:43And I've been out with two or three girls.
0:05:43 > 0:05:46I will not let him break Dani's heart.
0:05:46 > 0:05:49Ow! Oh, I bruised my pinkie.
0:05:49 > 0:05:51Why don't you let the Maxinator do his thing?
0:05:51 > 0:05:56Max, no offence, but when have you ever done anything for Dani?
0:05:56 > 0:06:00- Apart from trying to ruin her life? - You're doing me a disservice, Jack.
0:06:00 > 0:06:03Peel away this cold, hard exterior
0:06:03 > 0:06:06and you'll find a sweet little brother.
0:06:06 > 0:06:08OK, fine, you can help.
0:06:08 > 0:06:11But we need some way to protect Dani by making this afternoon
0:06:11 > 0:06:13a total disaster.
0:06:13 > 0:06:16Jack, my dear, bewildered Jack,
0:06:16 > 0:06:19you're speaking to the master of disaster.
0:06:19 > 0:06:21I can do all that with a simple phone call.
0:06:21 > 0:06:24Yeah? A phone call to who?
0:06:24 > 0:06:26My grandad.
0:06:26 > 0:06:28Nope.
0:06:28 > 0:06:31No. Definitely not. No.
0:06:31 > 0:06:34Remember to stay calm and to be true to yourself.
0:06:34 > 0:06:37- You're bound to win him over. - I am going to stay true to myself -
0:06:37 > 0:06:39by completely changing my appearance!
0:06:39 > 0:06:41I don't think you need a total make-over.
0:06:41 > 0:06:45Maybe we could just inject a tiny touch of emo into your regular look.
0:06:45 > 0:06:49No half-measures. It's full emo or nothing.
0:07:07 > 0:07:10Now think like a tortured intellectual.
0:07:10 > 0:07:13Would you like to hear a poem about my inner pain?
0:07:13 > 0:07:15Ooh, how was that?
0:07:15 > 0:07:19THEY SQUEAL
0:07:19 > 0:07:22That's him! That's him! That's him!
0:07:22 > 0:07:26- Can't breathe.- Brandon's waiting! - DOORBELL RINGS
0:07:29 > 0:07:34- Either Brandon's let himself go or that's not Brandon.- Dani!
0:07:37 > 0:07:40Er, hi, Grandad? Er, that's my friend.
0:07:40 > 0:07:42- I'm Dani.- I'm sorry, sweetheart.
0:07:42 > 0:07:45I never recognised you with all that stuff over your face.
0:07:45 > 0:07:48- What's on my face?! - That's make-up.- Make-up?!
0:07:48 > 0:07:50You never used to wear make-up.
0:07:50 > 0:07:52You haven't seen me in five years.
0:07:52 > 0:07:56Now, you knew I'd been on a year-long expedition to South America
0:07:56 > 0:07:59in search of the elusive tukka-tukka bird.
0:07:59 > 0:08:02Where were you for the other four years?
0:08:02 > 0:08:04Trying to find my way back out again!
0:08:07 > 0:08:11"In four hundred metres, turn left at the banyan tree."
0:08:11 > 0:08:14- Left at the banyan tree. Banyan tree? What banyan tree?- "Recalculating..."
0:08:14 > 0:08:17It'll find its bearings in a minute.
0:08:17 > 0:08:20- "In fifty metres, turn left at the man-eating plant."- Man-eating plant.
0:08:20 > 0:08:24- There isn't a man-eating plant! - "Low battery."- Come on, work!
0:08:24 > 0:08:26"Beware of gorillas."
0:08:26 > 0:08:31Gorillas? There aren't any gorillas in South America!
0:08:35 > 0:08:38I was only going to ask if he wanted directions.
0:08:43 > 0:08:45So, what brings you here today of all days?
0:08:45 > 0:08:49Do I need an excuse to visit my own grandchildren?
0:08:49 > 0:08:51Grandad! Missed you so much!
0:08:51 > 0:08:53Missed you too, big fella!
0:08:53 > 0:08:56Listen, I've brought you something. They're giant termite larvae.
0:08:56 > 0:09:00Do you know, I met an Amazonian tribe who used to eat these like sweets!
0:09:00 > 0:09:03Thanks, Grandad, it's wicked!
0:09:03 > 0:09:05- Oh, that's horrible. - You sure you won't have one?
0:09:05 > 0:09:08No, I'm OK, thanks. Mum and Dad at home, are they?
0:09:08 > 0:09:11They're not back till this evening.
0:09:11 > 0:09:14You don't mind if I just hang around and wait for them, do you?
0:09:16 > 0:09:21You wouldn't believe what I had to do to survive - building shelters out of
0:09:21 > 0:09:23tree bark and my own chest hair,
0:09:23 > 0:09:27wrestling with giant anacondas
0:09:27 > 0:09:31and straining filthy river water through my own underpants!
0:09:31 > 0:09:35I seriously have the coolest grandad in the world.
0:09:35 > 0:09:37- He'll be here in a minute...- I know.
0:09:37 > 0:09:39I don't believe how my grandchildren are growing up.
0:09:39 > 0:09:42I can remember changing Dani's nappies!
0:09:42 > 0:09:44Shame!
0:09:44 > 0:09:48I have a photo of her somewhere. Let's have a look.
0:09:48 > 0:09:51It's in here somewhere.
0:09:51 > 0:09:53Now...
0:09:55 > 0:09:57Just a minute.
0:09:57 > 0:10:01- There. There they are! - Grandad, please...
0:10:01 > 0:10:03Oh, man, this is classic!
0:10:03 > 0:10:06You look like you've been struck by lightning.
0:10:06 > 0:10:08You look lovely in that one.
0:10:08 > 0:10:10Look, Grandad, it's great to
0:10:10 > 0:10:13see you but I'm kind of busy this afternoon.
0:10:13 > 0:10:15What are you up to, then? Homework?
0:10:15 > 0:10:19Dani's got a rock star coming to see her, Grandad. A rock star?
0:10:19 > 0:10:22He wants us to record her duet.
0:10:22 > 0:10:25Blimey! You really are growing up.
0:10:25 > 0:10:32But tell me, aren't rock stars normally, y'know, trouble?
0:10:32 > 0:10:35Exactly my point. This guy practically invented trouble.
0:10:35 > 0:10:37Between you and me,
0:10:37 > 0:10:41I think Dani's rather hoping they'll do a little more than sing a duet.
0:10:45 > 0:10:49Dani, are you sure you're going to be safe in this house with some
0:10:49 > 0:10:51strange rock star?
0:10:51 > 0:10:53She won't be alone. Me and Jack are here.
0:10:53 > 0:10:55Yeah, but I think it's a bad idea.
0:10:55 > 0:10:57I'm staying too, just to make sure.
0:10:57 > 0:11:02- But...- You won't even know I'm here! DOORBELL CHIMES
0:11:02 > 0:11:05- That'll be Brandon.- Remember, Dani,
0:11:05 > 0:11:08deep breaths and stay calm.
0:11:12 > 0:11:14Listen, boys,
0:11:15 > 0:11:19I want to know everything about this Brandon fella.
0:11:19 > 0:11:23And when I say everything, I mean everything.
0:11:24 > 0:11:27You heard Grandad! He still thinks I'm a little girl.
0:11:27 > 0:11:31- He's going to ruin this whole thing. - I'll deal with him.
0:11:31 > 0:11:33I won't let anything spoil your chances with Brandon.
0:11:33 > 0:11:34Good luck!
0:11:42 > 0:11:45Brandon! Hi.
0:11:45 > 0:11:46I'm Dani.
0:11:46 > 0:11:49- It's horrible weather out.- Really? I thought it was sunny today.
0:11:49 > 0:11:51I prefer rain.
0:11:51 > 0:11:55It's like the sky is... Crying.
0:11:55 > 0:12:01Me too! Rain, thunderstorms, foggy days.
0:12:01 > 0:12:05Basically, I'm into all the more depressing weather types.
0:12:05 > 0:12:07Yeah, I'm pretty deep.
0:12:07 > 0:12:10You don't want to know how deep I go.
0:12:10 > 0:12:13I go so deep, I can't even see the bottom.
0:12:13 > 0:12:15Just the fathomless depths.
0:12:15 > 0:12:19Deep, dark fathomless depths.
0:12:19 > 0:12:21So intense!
0:12:28 > 0:12:31- Shall we go into the den? - Yeah, I suppose.
0:12:31 > 0:12:34- Nice look, by the way.- Thanks.
0:12:34 > 0:12:36I, er, dress like this all the time.
0:12:36 > 0:12:39You can't go in.
0:12:39 > 0:12:41- Why not?- Hi...
0:12:41 > 0:12:43Brandon, hi. I'm Sam.
0:12:43 > 0:12:45Hey.
0:12:45 > 0:12:48- What's going on? - Yeah, what is going on?
0:12:48 > 0:12:50We have a lot to discuss.
0:12:50 > 0:12:53The den, it's, erm, dusty.
0:12:53 > 0:12:55I like dust.
0:12:55 > 0:13:00Reminds me that we're all slowly decaying.
0:13:00 > 0:13:03Not dust, rust. Rusty pipes.
0:13:03 > 0:13:06Leaking, rusting water pipes.
0:13:06 > 0:13:09Leaked everywhere! Very bad. Me go fix them. OK!
0:13:27 > 0:13:31All done. So, erm, have fun!
0:13:31 > 0:13:36It was lovely to meet you, Brandon.
0:13:36 > 0:13:40OK... Bye!
0:13:44 > 0:13:47That's my friend Sam.
0:13:47 > 0:13:50Your friend is weird.
0:13:55 > 0:13:57He's not just any boy, though.
0:13:57 > 0:13:59Brandon Noir has a bad reputation.
0:13:59 > 0:14:01Dani is too young.
0:14:01 > 0:14:05She shouldn't be involved with boys yet, especially when he's an emu.
0:14:05 > 0:14:07- Emo.- That too.
0:14:07 > 0:14:11Dani's happiness is important to me, too.
0:14:11 > 0:14:14I don't want to see her getting hurt. I'll tell you what, lads,
0:14:14 > 0:14:18we are going to put an end to this love affair before it even begins.
0:14:18 > 0:14:21No-one is putting an end to anything.
0:14:21 > 0:14:25Do you think plastering embarrassing photos all over the den is going to
0:14:25 > 0:14:28stop true love from blossoming?
0:14:28 > 0:14:31- Well, it wasn't me!- Nor me.
0:14:31 > 0:14:33That, er, might have been me.
0:14:33 > 0:14:35I thought if I embarrassed Dani,
0:14:35 > 0:14:39it might ruin her chances with Brandon in some way.
0:14:39 > 0:14:42Dani is not going to be embarrassed over these cute photographs.
0:14:42 > 0:14:43She looks lovely in them!
0:14:43 > 0:14:46Good point. Silly me.
0:14:46 > 0:14:51- Is anyone thinking about what Dani wants?- She's too young to know.
0:14:51 > 0:14:54How do you know what's best for Dani? You've been stuck in the
0:14:54 > 0:14:58rainforest for five years, sucking stagnant water out of your pants.
0:14:58 > 0:15:05Be that as it may, I'm going to get the measure of this Brandon Na-na.
0:15:05 > 0:15:08You I expected this from, but you?
0:15:08 > 0:15:12- Who, me?- I expect better from you.
0:15:13 > 0:15:15I fear I may have been overestimated.
0:15:17 > 0:15:20This is deeply humiliating, Co-ordinator Zarg.
0:15:20 > 0:15:25Control has ordered us to investigate human parental roles.
0:15:25 > 0:15:28I shall assume the role of parent and you shall be my infant baby.
0:15:28 > 0:15:30Stupid!
0:15:30 > 0:15:32Is baby ready for her bottle?
0:15:37 > 0:15:40Drink it all up, baby Bubbub!
0:15:40 > 0:15:45Come on, baby, it's time for your feed, so please behave!
0:15:45 > 0:15:48Oh.
0:15:48 > 0:15:51No, Co-ordinator, don't.
0:15:51 > 0:15:53SHE WAILS
0:15:53 > 0:15:55Stop crying!
0:15:55 > 0:15:59Why are you doing this? Stop crying!
0:15:59 > 0:16:02Baby needs a nappy change.
0:16:02 > 0:16:05This is a silly assignment. Mm!
0:16:08 > 0:16:11I was in the studio when I heard your
0:16:11 > 0:16:13demo coming out of some speakers, and I thought,
0:16:13 > 0:16:15"Yeah, sounds all right.
0:16:15 > 0:16:19- "Yeah, there's a voice I could work with and stuff."- Wow.
0:16:19 > 0:16:23I shouldn't say this, but I'm such a big fan.
0:16:23 > 0:16:30- Really? I'd never have guessed.- Oh, that.
0:16:30 > 0:16:32I hate looking at pictures of myself.
0:16:32 > 0:16:34Yeah, probably best I take it down.
0:16:34 > 0:16:38You know, those photos never capture my true essence.
0:16:38 > 0:16:43I'm a multilayered intellectual, not some pretty-boy pop star.
0:16:43 > 0:16:47- I couldn't agree more.- I, er, didn't say you had to take it down.
0:16:49 > 0:16:53- Right.- So, you're up for doing this duet thing, yeah?
0:16:53 > 0:16:55- Up for it? I am- so- up for it.
0:16:55 > 0:16:59I'm like a bird in a balloon on the moon.
0:16:59 > 0:17:03Sorry, that sounded so much better in my head.
0:17:03 > 0:17:06Hello! You must be thingy.
0:17:06 > 0:17:08Brandon. Whatever.
0:17:08 > 0:17:12Sergeant-Major Rodney Treeboys. Retired.
0:17:12 > 0:17:13Very pleased to meet you.
0:17:13 > 0:17:17Ow! I need that hand. That's the hand I use to hold my, you know...
0:17:17 > 0:17:20- Guitar?- Hair straighteners.
0:17:22 > 0:17:24Is that black nail varnish, son?
0:17:24 > 0:17:26Or did you slam your hand in a drawer?
0:17:26 > 0:17:30Look, no offence, old man, but we're kind of busy, so if you wouldn't mind
0:17:30 > 0:17:32just scooting along... Oi!
0:17:32 > 0:17:36You just watch who you're telling to "scoot along", all right?
0:17:36 > 0:17:38I was in the SAS for twenty years.
0:17:38 > 0:17:42Now, you do not get those medals for flower arranging.
0:17:42 > 0:17:47Grandad, I know Brandon seems a bit abrupt, but he's a intellectual.
0:17:47 > 0:17:49They're all like that.
0:17:49 > 0:17:51Probably.
0:17:51 > 0:17:55This is a great opportunity to help with my singing career.
0:17:55 > 0:17:58- Anything for my beautiful little granddaughter.- OK.
0:18:01 > 0:18:04Old people suck.
0:18:06 > 0:18:08- Hi! Sorry.- Now what?
0:18:08 > 0:18:11- I was just checking everything's OK. - Everything's fine.
0:18:11 > 0:18:14I promise there won't be any more interruptions.
0:18:14 > 0:18:17Well, would you mind not interrupting us now?
0:18:21 > 0:18:24Yes. Sorry. OK. Bye!
0:18:31 > 0:18:33You were right, boys.
0:18:33 > 0:18:35I've got the measure of this Brandon fella.
0:18:35 > 0:18:37He's trouble, all right.
0:18:37 > 0:18:39- I can smell him a mile off. - What's the plan?
0:18:39 > 0:18:42Right, I'm going to call it Operation Scupper The Emo.
0:18:42 > 0:18:44We'll keep interrupting them
0:18:44 > 0:18:48so that this Brandon fella can never make his move, see?
0:18:48 > 0:18:51Now, here's a map of the den. And here's some
0:18:51 > 0:18:54surveillance photographs.
0:18:54 > 0:18:57- Now, first thing we require is... - This has got to stop.
0:18:57 > 0:19:00I'm not going to let you ruin Dani's chances with Brandon.
0:19:00 > 0:19:04- She really likes him.- You're either with us or against us, Sam.
0:19:04 > 0:19:06- Obviously, I'm against you. - Then you'll have to leave!
0:19:06 > 0:19:08This is a military command centre.
0:19:14 > 0:19:16You're the first person I've shown these lyrics to.
0:19:16 > 0:19:19Wow. That's such an honour, Brandon.
0:19:19 > 0:19:22- I'm touched.- Yeah, well, my manager said I had to, so...
0:19:22 > 0:19:26It's called My Heart Is A Flower That Wilts In The Sun.
0:19:26 > 0:19:33It's about my own personal war with love, how I've been wounded,
0:19:33 > 0:19:36how I got my battle scars but how I'll always step bravely out
0:19:36 > 0:19:38onto the battlefield of the heart.
0:19:38 > 0:19:42So real. It's almost like you're writing about my life.
0:19:42 > 0:19:43Yeah.
0:19:43 > 0:19:48So, I sing this part, and then you come in here, and...
0:19:48 > 0:19:51Dani? Dani?
0:19:51 > 0:19:53- Hm?- Did you hear what I said?
0:19:53 > 0:19:56Absolutely. Every word.
0:19:56 > 0:19:58Have you ever considered that a new girlfriend
0:19:58 > 0:20:01could make those battle scars disappear?
0:20:01 > 0:20:03Ow! My face! My hair!
0:20:03 > 0:20:06- Brandon, are you all right? - I don't know!
0:20:06 > 0:20:08Sorry!
0:20:08 > 0:20:10Get me a mirror. I need to check my hair!
0:20:10 > 0:20:12Jack, what are you playing at?
0:20:12 > 0:20:15Just trying to score a touchdown. Or whatever it is.
0:20:15 > 0:20:18Tackle him, Max!
0:20:18 > 0:20:20Grandad, what are you doing?
0:20:20 > 0:20:22- You're ruining everything. - We're just having a game of rugby.
0:20:22 > 0:20:24It all gets out of hand.
0:20:24 > 0:20:28- Why do you have to play it in here? - I tried to stop him.
0:20:28 > 0:20:29Hi.
0:20:29 > 0:20:34Have you got any hair straighteners? These idiots have crinkled my wave!
0:20:34 > 0:20:37Our work is done here for the moment. Come on.
0:20:37 > 0:20:40Hup, hup, hup, hup!
0:20:40 > 0:20:42It won't happen again, I promise.
0:20:42 > 0:20:44- Is Brandon OK?- Yeah.
0:20:44 > 0:20:47I wasn't expecting him to be quite so obsessed with his appearance,
0:20:47 > 0:20:51but who wouldn't be if they were as gorgeous as him?
0:20:51 > 0:20:53You're my wing man on this, Sam. I'm relying on you.
0:20:53 > 0:20:56Roger. No more interruptions.
0:20:56 > 0:21:00Might just be quicker if I just walked.
0:21:00 > 0:21:03Now we move on to the omega part of the operation.
0:21:03 > 0:21:05Maybe we've done enough.
0:21:05 > 0:21:07- Why?- Well, you never mess with an emo's hair!
0:21:07 > 0:21:13I hope he's packing up his nail varnish and moving out.
0:21:13 > 0:21:16What's that dreadful noise? I think it's emo.
0:21:16 > 0:21:18They're getting ready to perform.
0:21:18 > 0:21:20Then we've still got work to do, lads.
0:21:21 > 0:21:23# Love hurts
0:21:23 > 0:21:26# It hurts me in spurts
0:21:26 > 0:21:28# Cos my heart simply...
0:21:30 > 0:21:32# Yeah!
0:21:32 > 0:21:35# Oh, why does it hurt so?
0:21:35 > 0:21:39# Oh, why won't the pain go?
0:21:39 > 0:21:42# I feel like a yo-yo
0:21:42 > 0:21:45# My mood's up and down-o... #
0:21:58 > 0:22:01- I can't get it open. - That's because I've locked it.
0:22:01 > 0:22:05And don't bother looking for the key, because you'll never find it.
0:22:10 > 0:22:13# Love causes pain
0:22:13 > 0:22:16# I feel pain when it rains
0:22:16 > 0:22:20# And I won't take the blame
0:22:20 > 0:22:23# For your shame
0:22:23 > 0:22:29# And it's pain, pain, pain,
0:22:29 > 0:22:33# I'm singing about the pain and the rain in my brain
0:22:33 > 0:22:35# It's insane! #
0:22:35 > 0:22:38You know what they say about never meeting your idols.
0:22:40 > 0:22:42You can't do that!
0:22:42 > 0:22:44You just watch me.
0:22:48 > 0:22:52Now what?! Oh!
0:22:52 > 0:22:54Oh, now they've locked us in!
0:22:56 > 0:22:58What did you do?
0:22:58 > 0:23:02- It wasn't me.- Stand aside!
0:23:02 > 0:23:05Which one of you is responsible for this outrage?
0:23:05 > 0:23:09That'd be me. How dare you interrupt my singing.
0:23:09 > 0:23:12Sounded more like you'd swallowed a sackful of kittens.
0:23:12 > 0:23:16Do you know who I am? I'm Brandon Noir,
0:23:16 > 0:23:19- King of the Emos.- I don't care if you are King of the Ostriches,
0:23:19 > 0:23:22you just stay well clear of my granddaughter, all right?
0:23:22 > 0:23:26Grandad! Don't you think you've done enough?
0:23:26 > 0:23:30Yeah, stay out of this, you wrinkled guffbucket.
0:23:30 > 0:23:33Oi! Just because you're famous doesn't give you the right
0:23:33 > 0:23:35to talk to people like dirt.
0:23:35 > 0:23:39Excuse me? I think five gold discs says that I can.
0:23:39 > 0:23:40Seriously, Dani, if you want
0:23:40 > 0:23:45to have my level of success, you've got to start toughening up. Fast.
0:23:45 > 0:23:48If getting five fold discs turns me into a vain, selfish,
0:23:48 > 0:23:52arrogant, obnoxious, pouting prima donna like you,
0:23:52 > 0:23:56then I'm fine the way I am, thank you very much.
0:23:56 > 0:23:59- Ooh, that's got to hurt. - It did. She bruised my sternum.
0:23:59 > 0:24:02I can't believe I thought you were cool.
0:24:03 > 0:24:05I don't need to stay here to be insulted.
0:24:05 > 0:24:08Yeah, you can do that anywhere.
0:24:08 > 0:24:12Farewell. Losers.
0:24:12 > 0:24:15I'll see you in the charts. Ooh!
0:24:15 > 0:24:17Ooh, no, I forgot.
0:24:17 > 0:24:19You won't be in them, will you, Dani?
0:24:23 > 0:24:27Oh. I just realised I can't actually go outside looking like this.
0:24:27 > 0:24:31Could I borrow your hair straighteners?
0:24:31 > 0:24:33- No!- Oh.
0:24:35 > 0:24:37Don't anybody talk to me.
0:24:45 > 0:24:49KNOCK AT DOOR You OK?
0:24:49 > 0:24:51I made a fool out of myself.
0:24:51 > 0:24:53No, you didn't.
0:24:53 > 0:24:55You were amazing, the way you stood up to him.
0:24:55 > 0:24:57- Really?- Yes!
0:24:57 > 0:25:00If anybody made a fool of themselves, it was me.
0:25:00 > 0:25:02I shouldn't have interfered.
0:25:02 > 0:25:06I should have allowed you to discover the truth about Brandon.
0:25:06 > 0:25:08I'm glad I did.
0:25:08 > 0:25:10- Do you forgive me? - Of course I forgive you.
0:25:13 > 0:25:17Awww, what a touching little scene(!)
0:25:17 > 0:25:21Don't tell me, you've come to gloat that things went badly with Brandon.
0:25:21 > 0:25:25Oh, I don't think Max is gloating. I think he's trying to help.
0:25:25 > 0:25:27That's why he called me here in the first place.
0:25:27 > 0:25:29You invited him here?
0:25:29 > 0:25:32Granddad, Max knew that you'd be overprotective and ruin
0:25:32 > 0:25:34my chances with Brandon.
0:25:34 > 0:25:35He was trying to humiliate me.
0:25:35 > 0:25:39Dani! Your wellbeing is always upmost in my mind.
0:25:39 > 0:25:43Max, I am not a man who takes pleasure out of
0:25:43 > 0:25:46being manipulated, and that's what you've been doing.
0:25:46 > 0:25:48That's an outrageous accusation.
0:25:48 > 0:25:51You've been playing me, Max, and I don't like it.
0:25:51 > 0:25:56So I think you and I should have a little chat.
0:25:58 > 0:26:02You were right, Brandon was a total self-obsessed plank.
0:26:02 > 0:26:06Dani, you have to stop him.
0:26:06 > 0:26:09He's going to make me sell my video game.
0:26:09 > 0:26:15Now, I think Max would benefit from some character-building hobbies,
0:26:15 > 0:26:17so we're going on a camping trip. It's inhuman!
0:26:17 > 0:26:20Come on, Max, and I'll teach you how
0:26:20 > 0:26:23to drain some filthy river water through your underpants!
0:26:23 > 0:26:28- NO-O-O-O! - See you in five years, guys!
0:26:31 > 0:26:33Another fine show comes to a close.
0:26:33 > 0:26:36And what have we learnt about parenting this week?
0:26:36 > 0:26:40That no matter how much you care for your child, you've got to let
0:26:40 > 0:26:43them make their own mistakes.
0:26:43 > 0:26:46I am very impressed, Co-ordinator Zak, and I couldn't agree more.
0:26:46 > 0:26:51Great! Cos I might have made a teeny-tiny mistake
0:26:51 > 0:26:55while I was carrying out a maintenance check.
0:26:55 > 0:27:00- I accidentally flushed our entire food supply into deep space.- What?!
0:27:00 > 0:27:01What are we going to eat now?
0:27:01 > 0:27:05Well, we could make an omelette from those eggs.
0:27:05 > 0:27:08There's another tray of eggs beside the console.
0:27:08 > 0:27:11Ah.
0:27:11 > 0:27:15Erm, something strange has happened to your eggs.
0:27:15 > 0:27:20Getting these guys to sit still in an omelette's going to be a nightmare.
0:27:20 > 0:27:23Oh, my! I'm a daddy!
0:27:25 > 0:27:30# Sometimes I feel like breaking free
0:27:30 > 0:27:34# Let's lift these chains let's ride this wave
0:27:34 > 0:27:37# Right out to sea
0:27:37 > 0:27:41# I will be
0:27:41 > 0:27:43# Breaking free. #