Only Child

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0:00:02 > 0:00:06- Any hyper post?- No, just bills.

0:00:06 > 0:00:12- Oh, and a package arrived...- Oh! - ..from your Nana Zarg.- Oh, no!

0:00:12 > 0:00:14She sent you this...

0:00:15 > 0:00:18..and she sent you these!

0:00:18 > 0:00:19Thank you.

0:00:19 > 0:00:22She said she was going to call you later.

0:00:22 > 0:00:23RINGING

0:00:23 > 0:00:25Don't answer that!

0:00:25 > 0:00:29- 'Zarkikins, is that you?' - Um, hi, Nana.

0:00:29 > 0:00:34Thank you for the ear muffs and the, er...

0:00:34 > 0:00:38- They're lovely.- 'Not too scratchy on your little bot-bot?'

0:00:38 > 0:00:42- They're fine.- 'I hope you're washing behind your ear flaps.'- Sorry, Nana.

0:00:42 > 0:00:46- I can't...you.- 'Zarky? ..Zarky!' - You're...up.

0:00:46 > 0:00:49- 'Zarky!'- We're going to land on the moon. Call you later. Bye.

0:00:51 > 0:00:54How could you be so mean to your nice Nana Zarg?

0:00:56 > 0:00:58Are we grumpy cos we missed our nap?

0:00:58 > 0:01:04I am a grown-up co-ordinator, not a baby, thank you very much.

0:01:04 > 0:01:07All right, don't throw your toys out of the pram, Zarkikins!

0:01:08 > 0:01:10Oh, it's time for Dani's House.

0:01:13 > 0:01:16Hi, my name's Dani and this is my fantastic new...

0:01:16 > 0:01:19- ..best friend, Jack!- Yeah, but..

0:01:19 > 0:01:20Oh, where was I?

0:01:20 > 0:01:23Your name's Dani and I'm your best friend too - Sam.

0:01:23 > 0:01:25As I was saying, this is my fantastic new...

0:01:25 > 0:01:27- Max!- I'm her brother

0:01:27 > 0:01:29- and actually it's...Ben.- What?

0:01:29 > 0:01:31Oh, it's OUR show.

0:01:31 > 0:01:32Can you just zip it?

0:01:32 > 0:01:36As I was saying, my name's Dani and this is my fantastic...

0:01:36 > 0:01:38OTHERS ALL TALK AT ONCE

0:01:38 > 0:01:39I give up.

0:01:49 > 0:01:51RAUCOUS MUSIC PLAYS

0:02:05 > 0:02:06MUSIC STOPS

0:02:06 > 0:02:08I was asleep.

0:02:08 > 0:02:11Dani has trouble getting up.

0:02:11 > 0:02:17See? It's not just a rumour, there's a time of day called "morning"(!)

0:02:22 > 0:02:24RAUCOUS MUSIC PLAYS AGAIN

0:02:26 > 0:02:28MUSIC CONTINUES TO BLARE

0:02:28 > 0:02:29DANI SIGHS

0:02:33 > 0:02:35I'm not going to let them get to me.

0:02:45 > 0:02:48Nice try, Maxie-boy, but nothing's going to ruin my breakfast.

0:03:15 > 0:03:17DANI SQUEALS

0:03:18 > 0:03:20- You're not funny! Open up! - DANI POUNDS ON DOOR

0:03:20 > 0:03:24I would, but the thing is, I'm not stupid.

0:03:24 > 0:03:27You're so dead, it's not true! Stop it, Ben.

0:03:33 > 0:03:38- Don't ask.- OK, I won't. - It was Max, all right?

0:03:38 > 0:03:40- He's just so... - DANI SQUEALS AGAIN

0:03:40 > 0:03:46- ..infuriating.- OK, OK, breathe in... out...in...

0:03:46 > 0:03:49You know what I'm thinking? It's barbecue weather.

0:03:49 > 0:03:54- I've had food poisoning, thanks(!) - I cook everything to perfection.

0:03:54 > 0:03:56DANI GRUNTS

0:03:56 > 0:03:59It was just that one time and most of the Scouts are fine now.

0:03:59 > 0:04:01- DANI GRUNTS - Oh, sorry, breathe out.

0:04:02 > 0:04:04Why me?

0:04:04 > 0:04:06Why did I end up with the little brother from hell?

0:04:06 > 0:04:10I can't go out, I can't bring anyone cool home...

0:04:10 > 0:04:11BOTH: What about us?

0:04:12 > 0:04:14Oh, yes, besides you.

0:04:14 > 0:04:18It's a nightmare. Why couldn't I have been an only child?

0:04:18 > 0:04:21- Parents thought you'd be lonely. - I'd have been happy with a puppy.

0:04:25 > 0:04:31- Happy birthday, darling!- Thanks. I love it.- We got you a little friend.

0:04:31 > 0:04:34- Don't want you being lonely. - I'm not lonely.

0:04:34 > 0:04:37Oh, he is kind of cute.

0:04:40 > 0:04:44Oh! What are you doing? Get down, you naughty puppy.

0:04:44 > 0:04:46Get down!

0:04:46 > 0:04:49Mind what you're doing!

0:04:53 > 0:04:55Right, you little...

0:04:56 > 0:05:00- HE PEES - Dead, boy, dead!

0:05:00 > 0:05:03No-o-o!

0:05:05 > 0:05:09No, on second thoughts, if it was anything like that!

0:05:09 > 0:05:11- Here.- What's this?

0:05:11 > 0:05:14Is it Rudolf the red-nosed reindeer in a snowdrift?

0:05:14 > 0:05:16No, it's a red button,

0:05:16 > 0:05:18and if you push it, Max will cease to exist,

0:05:18 > 0:05:21like he'd never been born in the first place.

0:05:21 > 0:05:24- And I'd be an only child.- Right, so are you going to push it?

0:05:25 > 0:05:28Think about this for a minute.

0:05:28 > 0:05:31Yes, he's more annoying than itchy underwear, but he's your brother.

0:05:31 > 0:05:35Go ahead. Push it and pouff! No more Max.

0:05:35 > 0:05:38Only child. You might find it hard to share.

0:05:38 > 0:05:41You could have parties, lie-ins, white T-shirts that stay white.

0:05:41 > 0:05:45- It's not right. - You know you want to.

0:05:52 > 0:05:57- I can't believe you actually did it. - What? It's only a bit of paper.

0:05:59 > 0:06:03- My own sister! How could she? - What did she do?- Guess.

0:06:03 > 0:06:07- Did she grind your face into the carpet?- Much worse.- Sing to you.

0:06:07 > 0:06:12- She pressed a button to make me cease to exist.- It's hard to guess.

0:06:12 > 0:06:18This time she's gone too far. We'll have to teach her a terrible lesson.

0:06:18 > 0:06:21- Yeah, how?- We'll make her dreams come true...

0:06:22 > 0:06:25..starting first thing tomorrow.

0:06:26 > 0:06:28BIRDSONG

0:06:30 > 0:06:31NO RAUCOUS MUSIC

0:07:06 > 0:07:09Guess even evil little brothers take a day off sometimes.

0:07:10 > 0:07:12- DOOR OPENS - Hey!

0:07:12 > 0:07:13You look chilled.

0:07:13 > 0:07:16That's because I just spent a whole hour in the bathroom

0:07:16 > 0:07:18without anyone banging the door down.

0:07:18 > 0:07:21- Is Max sick?- I heard him get up - haven't seen him since.

0:07:21 > 0:07:25He's probably out terrorising someone else.

0:07:25 > 0:07:27# Stand by your buns! #

0:07:27 > 0:07:29The burger-meister is in the house.

0:07:29 > 0:07:33Prepare your drool buds for when you taste my secret sauce.

0:07:33 > 0:07:36- Oooh! What's in it?- I'd tell you but then I'd have to kill you.

0:07:40 > 0:07:43Has it got mustard, honey and OJ with bits in?

0:07:43 > 0:07:47Orange, chillies and slimy old fish skin?

0:07:47 > 0:07:50Soya sauce, wine gums and fresh chicken wings?

0:07:50 > 0:07:52- BOTH: Mmm!- Are we close?

0:07:52 > 0:07:56- Mmm! Nowhere near. - So, when are we eating?

0:07:56 > 0:08:00After everything gets burnt to a crisp, we send out for pizza.

0:08:00 > 0:08:03Oh, ye of little faith. Ready by dinner time.

0:08:03 > 0:08:08- Sam, we could watch some telly. - No Max to stop us.

0:08:08 > 0:08:10BOTH: Yee!

0:08:13 > 0:08:15Maybe Jack's red button worked after all.

0:08:15 > 0:08:22- Hi.- Knew it wouldn't last.- What? - Isn't Max with you?- No.

0:08:22 > 0:08:24Our luck's holding!

0:08:27 > 0:08:28Hi.

0:08:40 > 0:08:41Psst, Ben!

0:08:41 > 0:08:42Max?

0:08:42 > 0:08:45Where are you?

0:08:45 > 0:08:46Up here, you dimwit!

0:09:00 > 0:09:03Oh, you scared me!

0:09:03 > 0:09:10- This is cool.- No, it's not. It's boiling hot and dusty. Atchoo!

0:09:10 > 0:09:14I've been stuck up here for hours. Has Dani missed me?

0:09:14 > 0:09:16Has she broken down in tears yet?

0:09:16 > 0:09:20Is she holding a picture of me and stroking my face?

0:09:20 > 0:09:25- Not exactly.- "Not exactly." I thought I'd have broken her by now.

0:09:25 > 0:09:28- Why isn't she more worried about me? - Because you're fine.

0:09:28 > 0:09:31- She doesn't know that.- You want me to tell her.- No.

0:09:31 > 0:09:36- Say you can't find me anywhere and get me a snack. I'm starving.- OK.

0:09:36 > 0:09:37Oh, and get rid of this.

0:09:40 > 0:09:43What is it?

0:09:43 > 0:09:45Oh, no!

0:09:45 > 0:09:47It's still a bit warm. Eugh!

0:09:52 > 0:09:54Now, I need to get my sauce together.

0:09:54 > 0:09:58A good chef tastes everything first. Oh, yeah.

0:10:00 > 0:10:02Mmm!

0:10:03 > 0:10:06- Oh! - HE SNIFFS

0:10:09 > 0:10:10Atchoo!

0:10:11 > 0:10:13Oh!

0:10:21 > 0:10:23Agghh!

0:10:23 > 0:10:25Help! My tongue's on fire!

0:10:25 > 0:10:29- Aggh!- Give me some of that! This is an emergency.

0:10:29 > 0:10:33- No, you can't! I won't let you. - Please! My tongue's a volcano!

0:10:44 > 0:10:46It's disgusting.

0:10:46 > 0:10:49I can't stand it any longer. I feel like a caged tiger.

0:10:49 > 0:10:51What's going on down there?

0:10:52 > 0:10:55Hmm!

0:10:55 > 0:10:57Crude...

0:11:00 > 0:11:04..but with the right modifications and a bit of old piping...

0:11:05 > 0:11:07Yes!

0:11:11 > 0:11:12..it could just work.

0:11:13 > 0:11:15Hope this mystery barbecue is worth the wait.

0:11:15 > 0:11:18You know he's actually not a bad cook, but don't say I told you so.

0:11:18 > 0:11:23You know, it's really odd. I can't find Max anywhere.

0:11:23 > 0:11:25I have a funny feeling he's gone.

0:11:25 > 0:11:29It's like he's just disappeared, like he's just not here or something.

0:11:29 > 0:11:31It's strange, almost haunting.

0:11:31 > 0:11:36- Anyone for tea?- Hang on. Was there anything troubling Max yesterday?

0:11:36 > 0:11:38Apart from the fact that you wanted him dead?

0:11:38 > 0:11:42No, I didn't. I just...sort of wished he didn't exist,

0:11:42 > 0:11:47- so he saw me pressing the... - Got any more firelighters?

0:11:47 > 0:11:51Uh-uh-uh! No more snacking or you'll spoil your tea!

0:11:51 > 0:11:57- Guess what?- Max saw everything. - My secret sauce recipe?!

0:11:58 > 0:12:01I must stop him before he tells the press.

0:12:01 > 0:12:04No. The button...clever clogs(!)

0:12:04 > 0:12:07It must have really hurt Max's feelings.

0:12:07 > 0:12:10He doesn't have any feelings, besides he totally asked for it.

0:12:10 > 0:12:14- Maybe we should all look for him. - Not me, Sam.

0:12:14 > 0:12:19- My sauce is like a baby, it needs love.- Smells like it needs changing.

0:12:22 > 0:12:26How does he do it? I finally get the place to myself...

0:12:26 > 0:12:30Come on. Let's look round the house. He probably hasn't gone far.

0:12:36 > 0:12:37BOTH: Aggh!

0:12:37 > 0:12:40- Sshh! You'll give me away.- What are you doing down here?- I needed this.

0:12:40 > 0:12:42- I'm hungry. Where's my snack? - I tried to.

0:12:42 > 0:12:45- Max! Where are you?- Move!

0:12:47 > 0:12:49We're all missing you.

0:12:49 > 0:12:53- He's not going to believe that. He's not stupid.- No!

0:12:53 > 0:12:55I looked. He's not in there.

0:12:55 > 0:12:59- I'll just make sure.- Look, is that him going upstairs?- Where?

0:13:17 > 0:13:19There you are!

0:13:20 > 0:13:22THEY LAUGH

0:13:23 > 0:13:27Co-ordinator Zak, what's that?

0:13:27 > 0:13:30Hmm? What? Oh!

0:13:31 > 0:13:32Nothing.

0:13:32 > 0:13:35If you press the button, I cease to exist, is that it?

0:13:35 > 0:13:42- No, actually, you get sent a basket of muffins.- That's lovely.

0:13:42 > 0:13:43No! You cease to exist.

0:13:43 > 0:13:48You really are the most horrible vile excuse for a co-ordinator, I ever...!

0:13:48 > 0:13:54- Uh-uh-uh! Now, be a darling and get me a cup of zinky-fruit tea.- No!

0:13:58 > 0:14:04- Um...what's that? - I'll give you one guess.

0:14:09 > 0:14:13- Don't tempt me. I'll do it. - So will I. I mean it.

0:14:19 > 0:14:21Oh.

0:14:23 > 0:14:26- This is all your fault.- Oh!

0:14:31 > 0:14:32There, that should do it.

0:14:32 > 0:14:34Now I can keep an eye on things.

0:14:34 > 0:14:40Wow! A periscope! That's so cool. Why do you want to see out the roof?

0:14:40 > 0:14:43I don't, you idiot. Hand it to me, Ben.

0:14:43 > 0:14:48- Flood the aft torpedo tube. Fire one! Dive, dive, dive!- Ben!- Oh.

0:14:49 > 0:14:54Max! Max! Max!

0:14:54 > 0:14:55- Any sign of him?- No.

0:14:55 > 0:15:00He's probably melting his toys or firing ants into space.

0:15:00 > 0:15:04- Aren't you a bit worried about him? - Not really. Probably just gone out.

0:15:04 > 0:15:08Look, it's Max. One thing is for sure, wherever he is, he's fine,

0:15:08 > 0:15:11- which is more than can be said for anyone near him.- But after you...

0:15:11 > 0:15:14- pressed the button.- If he was that bothered, he'd wonder why.

0:15:14 > 0:15:17He'd be sorry he'd pushed me past the brink of sanity.

0:15:17 > 0:15:20You hurt his feelings. Shouldn't you apologise?

0:15:20 > 0:15:24Me? No! Max is the one who should say sorry.

0:15:27 > 0:15:30"Sorry"! Why should I feel sorry? She was the one who...

0:15:30 > 0:15:34- Wait.- What are you going to do? - I'll do what she least expects -

0:15:34 > 0:15:37the one thing that will really get her worried.

0:15:37 > 0:15:40I'll write her a note of apology.

0:15:40 > 0:15:43That's so fiendish...I think.

0:15:43 > 0:15:45- Ben!- Hide!

0:15:47 > 0:15:49All clear up here.

0:15:51 > 0:15:55- Were you talking to someone? - What, me? No.

0:15:55 > 0:15:59See? Just old tennis racquets and mouse droppings.

0:15:59 > 0:16:01Probably rats up here, huge ones.

0:16:01 > 0:16:04What's behind here?

0:16:05 > 0:16:06Agghh!

0:16:06 > 0:16:10- Ben? Ben, are you all right?- Oh-h!

0:16:12 > 0:16:16Right. Now to add my secret ingredients.

0:16:16 > 0:16:20You know, no-one's allowed to see what goes into my sauce, not even me.

0:16:53 > 0:16:57So that's what goes into Jack's special sauce, is it?

0:16:57 > 0:17:01I can see all your secrets, all your secrets, I tell you!

0:17:01 > 0:17:03HE LAUGHS EVILLY

0:17:06 > 0:17:11- Are you OK, Ben?- Yeah, yeah. It's just so hot and stuffy up there.

0:17:11 > 0:17:14- I don't know. Do you think we should worry?- No, honestly, I'm fine.

0:17:14 > 0:17:16I meant about Max.

0:17:16 > 0:17:17Nearly ready.

0:17:17 > 0:17:20- Oh, any sign of him?- Who?- Max.

0:17:20 > 0:17:22- No, just the note.- What note?

0:17:22 > 0:17:24- The one I found stuck to the door. - Let me see it.

0:17:26 > 0:17:27"Take two bottles..."

0:17:27 > 0:17:31My recipe! Just forget you saw that.

0:17:33 > 0:17:38"Dear Dani, your wish has come true. I've run away.

0:17:38 > 0:17:43"Maybe when I'm 21 I will return with a beard and intriguing scar.

0:17:43 > 0:17:46"I'm sorry I've been such a disappointment, fondly, Max."

0:17:46 > 0:17:50OK, I guess he does have feelings.

0:17:51 > 0:17:55- Who knew?- I don't know what he's up to, but I'm getting worried now.

0:17:55 > 0:17:58We haven't checked outside. He could be hiding in the garden.

0:17:58 > 0:18:00OK, let's form a search party.

0:18:00 > 0:18:04- If he's not there, I'm calling my parents.- I'll get a torch.

0:18:04 > 0:18:07- Anything else we need?- Actually, Jack, you should stay here.

0:18:07 > 0:18:11- Someone needs to be here in case he comes out of hiding.- Ben's here.

0:18:11 > 0:18:12Someone sensible.

0:18:14 > 0:18:17- Are you leaving Jack?- Best I can do.

0:18:18 > 0:18:21The note was a masterstroke. I'm a genius.

0:18:21 > 0:18:25It's not weird at all that I'm up in the attic, talking to myself.

0:18:31 > 0:18:33Ah, goody! Something to eat.

0:18:33 > 0:18:36What took him so long?

0:18:36 > 0:18:37Uh-uh-uh-uh-uh!

0:18:37 > 0:18:41I think we should wait, don't you, until the others get here?

0:18:41 > 0:18:45- You don't understand. It's not for me, it's for...- Who?- Er...you.

0:18:45 > 0:18:50- I bet all that cooking has made you hungry.- Well, I am pretty peckish.

0:18:50 > 0:18:53I'm sure the girls won't mind if we start without them.

0:18:55 > 0:18:57Here.

0:18:58 > 0:19:01Mmm! Yummy, eh?

0:19:01 > 0:19:04They don't call me the barbie-meister for nothing.

0:19:04 > 0:19:10This is delicious and that sauce, it's amazing and that after-burn,

0:19:10 > 0:19:11it's exquisite...

0:19:12 > 0:19:14..and that special tang...

0:19:15 > 0:19:17(Sorry!)

0:19:17 > 0:19:20People can smell it for miles, drives them crazy.

0:19:20 > 0:19:24Oh, I'm so hungry, I could eat anything.

0:19:30 > 0:19:31Oh, yes, yes.

0:19:35 > 0:19:39A ship. I see a ship, but it's far, far away.

0:19:39 > 0:19:41Other way, you idiot.

0:19:43 > 0:19:45Oh, now it's much closer.

0:19:45 > 0:19:48Hey, we're over here. Hey!

0:19:48 > 0:19:50Oh! It sunk.

0:19:52 > 0:19:55You know, Ben, even though we're stuck here

0:19:55 > 0:19:57with only seaweed and barnacles to eat,

0:19:57 > 0:19:59at least we've stood by each other...

0:19:59 > 0:20:01CHICKEN CLUCKS

0:20:03 > 0:20:05..but we must all make sacrifices.

0:20:08 > 0:20:09And if only one of us makes it,

0:20:09 > 0:20:13I promise I'll tell everyone how brave you were.

0:20:13 > 0:20:15Max?

0:20:16 > 0:20:18- Max, what are you doing?- Sorry.

0:20:21 > 0:20:24Oh, my stomach hurts!

0:20:24 > 0:20:26Well, I did make enough for six!

0:20:26 > 0:20:27Is there any left?

0:20:30 > 0:20:32Did Max come back?

0:20:32 > 0:20:34'Fraid not. Did you see him out there?

0:20:34 > 0:20:36He could be at a friend's house.

0:20:36 > 0:20:38I'm starving, is there any food?

0:20:38 > 0:20:42Sam! How could you think of food at a time like this?

0:20:42 > 0:20:43That's it. Where's the phone?

0:20:43 > 0:20:45I'm going to call Mum and Dad.

0:20:45 > 0:20:48OK, but the important thing is not to panic.

0:20:48 > 0:20:52- Put pictures up of him on trees. - He's my brother, not a lost kitten!

0:20:53 > 0:20:57I'd give anything to see him again, see his cheeky little face,

0:20:57 > 0:20:58hear his laugh...

0:20:58 > 0:21:00This is Max we're talking about!

0:21:00 > 0:21:02I know, but he's my brother!

0:21:02 > 0:21:03I love him...

0:21:03 > 0:21:05even though he is a berk.

0:21:05 > 0:21:08You said his laugh sounded like a weasel caught in a fan.

0:21:08 > 0:21:11No, I didn't! I love his laugh!

0:21:11 > 0:21:15And when he tilts his head back and you can see right up his nose.

0:21:15 > 0:21:17I wouldn't do that yet!

0:21:17 > 0:21:18Why not?

0:21:18 > 0:21:21Because I'm sure when Max really thinks about it,

0:21:21 > 0:21:23he'll decide to come down.

0:21:23 > 0:21:24I mean...back.

0:21:24 > 0:21:28He's probably going a bit mad up there...out there.

0:21:33 > 0:21:34She misses my laugh.

0:21:34 > 0:21:36Serves her right.

0:21:38 > 0:21:39What if I get in trouble for it?

0:21:39 > 0:21:43Nah, my parents will blame her for not looking after me.

0:21:43 > 0:21:47Only, you do feel bad she's worried, don't you?

0:21:47 > 0:21:49No, I don't!

0:21:49 > 0:21:51I'm the winner, I'm the best,

0:21:51 > 0:21:54I'm... Ohhh!

0:21:54 > 0:21:57Starving actually.

0:21:59 > 0:22:02Hi, Mum. Look, I don't want to worry you but...

0:22:02 > 0:22:04- DOOR BELL RINGS - Can someone let me in, please?

0:22:04 > 0:22:06I just called to say hi. Goodbye!

0:22:09 > 0:22:11Max!

0:22:11 > 0:22:14Hi, I just came back to get my stuff.

0:22:14 > 0:22:16Mmm... Is that food I smell?

0:22:16 > 0:22:17Oh, Max!

0:22:17 > 0:22:21Easy! I only have one spine.

0:22:22 > 0:22:25I never thought I'd be pleased to see you. Where have you been?

0:22:25 > 0:22:27The bus shelter I now call home.

0:22:27 > 0:22:29Oh dear, that sounds grim!

0:22:29 > 0:22:32On the plus side, it's just outside the door.

0:22:33 > 0:22:35Look, Max, I'm really sorry.

0:22:35 > 0:22:37I didn't mean it. It was a stupid joke.

0:22:37 > 0:22:41Look, you're my little brother and I want you to stay.

0:22:41 > 0:22:43If you're sure I won't be a burden.

0:22:43 > 0:22:45Of course not.

0:22:45 > 0:22:48And if there's anything I can do to make it up to you...

0:22:48 > 0:22:50Well, I always fancied your mountain bike.

0:22:50 > 0:22:51Uh! Don't push it, OK?

0:22:56 > 0:22:58Hungry, little bro?

0:22:58 > 0:23:02The barbie-meister's on the case. I've fired it up again.

0:23:02 > 0:23:04I know, I can smell it.

0:23:04 > 0:23:07Max, you're kind of drooling!

0:23:07 > 0:23:10Give him the best bits. He must be ravenous.

0:23:10 > 0:23:12Definitely. It's great to see you again, Max.

0:23:12 > 0:23:14You had your sister in a right state.

0:23:14 > 0:23:17Maybe next time you'll think before tempting her

0:23:17 > 0:23:19with one of your red-button drawings.

0:23:19 > 0:23:23Right. So I'll just go get the...

0:23:24 > 0:23:25Pass me the remote, Sam.

0:23:34 > 0:23:35Can I have my lemonade?

0:23:35 > 0:23:37Get it yourself!

0:23:37 > 0:23:40Here we go - made with love...

0:23:40 > 0:23:43and the barbie-meister's special sauce.

0:23:43 > 0:23:46- I don't know what he puts in it.- And you never will.

0:23:46 > 0:23:48You wouldn't believe me.

0:23:48 > 0:23:51What's so special about ketchup mixed with peanut butter?

0:23:52 > 0:23:54My secret!

0:23:54 > 0:23:55It's OK. It's still really nice.

0:23:55 > 0:24:00That's it?! That's the barbie-meister's top-secret recipe?

0:24:00 > 0:24:01How did you know?

0:24:01 > 0:24:03It's impossible, no-one saw me!

0:24:11 > 0:24:15Max, Max, Max, little Maxie...

0:24:15 > 0:24:17Could you pass me the coleslaw please, I'm starving!

0:24:17 > 0:24:19You never went out, did you?

0:24:20 > 0:24:21Of course I did.

0:24:21 > 0:24:24Liar! He's been spying on us the whole time,

0:24:24 > 0:24:27with one of those eye in the skies.

0:24:27 > 0:24:29Do you need to lie down?

0:24:29 > 0:24:32No! Honestly, he had one of those periscope thingies.

0:24:32 > 0:24:34That's why he knew what was in your secret sauce.

0:24:34 > 0:24:38OK, nobody leaves the room.

0:24:41 > 0:24:44OK, there is a perfectly reasonable expla...

0:24:44 > 0:24:45Run!

0:24:45 > 0:24:48Yeah, that's right - run while you still have legs!

0:24:50 > 0:24:52Going somewhere, spy boy?

0:24:52 > 0:24:55THEY SCREAM

0:24:56 > 0:25:01Mmmm! This barbecue really is excellent!

0:25:01 > 0:25:03Crispy and chewy on the outside,

0:25:03 > 0:25:06juicy and tender on the inside.

0:25:06 > 0:25:09And how gorgeous is this sauce?

0:25:09 > 0:25:11Sweet and smoky.

0:25:12 > 0:25:13Mmmm!

0:25:13 > 0:25:16And the after-burn really is exquisite!

0:25:18 > 0:25:21But where are my manners? Let me share it with you.

0:25:24 > 0:25:26MAX SNIFFS

0:25:29 > 0:25:31Argh! This is inhuman!

0:25:31 > 0:25:34Why didn't you get me a snack when I told you to? Why?!

0:25:34 > 0:25:37- I tried! - How can you stand that smell?

0:25:37 > 0:25:40I'm full. You know that uncomfortably-tight feeling...

0:25:40 > 0:25:42No, I don't know!

0:25:42 > 0:25:45Yummy food!

0:25:45 > 0:25:48Well, I'll just leave this outside for you with all the trimmings.

0:25:48 > 0:25:52Potato salad and chocolate brownie.

0:25:52 > 0:25:53I can't stand it.

0:25:53 > 0:25:56Why did I get the big sister from hell? Why?!

0:25:56 > 0:25:59Maybe if you press the red button she'll disappear.

0:25:59 > 0:26:01- That's never going to work. - What have we got to lose?

0:26:01 > 0:26:03Surely it's worth a try.

0:26:10 > 0:26:11It's a trap.

0:26:14 > 0:26:16No, I think she's really gone.

0:26:26 > 0:26:28THEY SCREAM

0:26:30 > 0:26:32Another most stimulating show.

0:26:32 > 0:26:34I was an only child, you know?

0:26:34 > 0:26:35Well, that explains a lot.

0:26:37 > 0:26:38What about you?

0:26:38 > 0:26:41I was the youngest of 300.

0:26:41 > 0:26:43My mum had us in batches of 40.

0:26:43 > 0:26:46I remember we had a lovely time in the slime cocoon,

0:26:46 > 0:26:48squirming over each other.

0:26:48 > 0:26:51Eww! Too much information.

0:26:51 > 0:26:52How were you born then?

0:26:52 > 0:26:53Like normal people -

0:26:53 > 0:26:55in a gelatine tank.

0:26:57 > 0:26:58Want to see a family snap?

0:26:58 > 0:27:00If I must.

0:27:05 > 0:27:07You had to be down pretty early in the morning

0:27:07 > 0:27:10if you wanted the last of the cereal, I can tell you.

0:27:10 > 0:27:12Ah! that must be you.

0:27:12 > 0:27:13You look exactly the same.

0:27:13 > 0:27:15Same mouth, same expression.

0:27:15 > 0:27:17That's my sister's pet lizard!

0:27:20 > 0:27:23Oh. Well, easy mistake to make.

0:27:25 > 0:27:31# Sometimes I feel like breaking free

0:27:31 > 0:27:33# Let's lift these chains

0:27:33 > 0:27:38# Let's rock this wave right out to sea

0:27:38 > 0:27:42# I will be... #