0:00:03 > 0:00:07I've prepared us a traditional Earth drink to enjoy during Dani's House.
0:00:07 > 0:00:10- It's called milk.- Mah?
0:00:10 > 0:00:12Milk.
0:00:12 > 0:00:14What a strange name.
0:00:14 > 0:00:16Hmmm, malk.
0:00:16 > 0:00:17No, MILK.
0:00:17 > 0:00:19- Milch?- Milk.- Milt?- Milk.
0:00:19 > 0:00:21Marple pub?
0:00:22 > 0:00:23Maldemole?
0:00:23 > 0:00:25Murdleburdle?
0:00:25 > 0:00:27Ah, just drink it. It's very good for you.
0:00:27 > 0:00:30Humans even give it to their infants.
0:00:30 > 0:00:35That is rather refreshing. Where does it come from?
0:00:35 > 0:00:37Some sort of plant, perhaps?
0:00:37 > 0:00:41SHE WHISPERS
0:00:41 > 0:00:44It comes out of where?! And you let me drink it.
0:00:44 > 0:00:47Relax, Coordinator Zang. It's perfectly natural.
0:00:47 > 0:00:49Besides, this isn't human milk.
0:00:49 > 0:00:52Thank goodness for that.
0:00:52 > 0:00:55This milk comes from a big, smelly cow.
0:00:55 > 0:00:59Look! You've got dirty, smelly cow juice all over Dani's House.
0:01:01 > 0:01:04Hey, guys! Great to see you.
0:01:04 > 0:01:06My name's Dani, and THIS is...
0:01:06 > 0:01:08- Her best friend, Sam.- Sam!
0:01:08 > 0:01:10As I was saying, my name's Dani and THIS is...
0:01:10 > 0:01:12Her other best friend, Jack.
0:01:12 > 0:01:14Stuffing his face as usual.
0:01:14 > 0:01:16As I was saying, my name's Dani, and THIS is...
0:01:16 > 0:01:19Brother Max, and his best friend, Ben.
0:01:19 > 0:01:23Get out of my way! QUIET!!!
0:01:23 > 0:01:25My name's Dani and THIS is Dani's House.
0:01:25 > 0:01:27- ALL SHOUT - Oh! I give up!
0:01:27 > 0:01:28SSHH!!!
0:01:33 > 0:01:36Hey, guys! I'm just going through some of my home movies.
0:01:36 > 0:01:40I'll put them on a hard drive, so I can watch them for years to come.
0:01:40 > 0:01:42Aw, I remember that day.
0:01:42 > 0:01:46That's the day me, Sam and Jack had a massive pillow fight.
0:01:49 > 0:01:51Ah, good times.
0:01:55 > 0:01:57What's this?
0:02:00 > 0:02:03DOCTOR WHO VOICE: Where have you brought me this time, old girl?
0:02:03 > 0:02:04What is this rubbish?
0:02:06 > 0:02:10ROBOT VOICE: Prepared to be robotomised, Time Lord.
0:02:10 > 0:02:13Not while I still have my sonic screwdriver, Tin Ribs!
0:02:13 > 0:02:15Ah! Max! Stop it! You're shining in my eyes.
0:02:15 > 0:02:18You know how sensitive my retinas are to shiny things. Ow!
0:02:19 > 0:02:21Now I've broken my shin.
0:02:21 > 0:02:23This is the worst ever episode of Doctor Who.
0:02:23 > 0:02:28He recorded over my stuff! He ACTUALLY recorded over my stuff.
0:02:28 > 0:02:30He's gone too far this time. WAY too far.
0:02:30 > 0:02:32I'm going to...
0:02:32 > 0:02:38M-A-A-A-A-A-X!!!
0:02:38 > 0:02:42- Did you say something?- You used my camcorder to make your stupid films.
0:02:42 > 0:02:44Really? Doesn't sound like something I'd do.
0:02:44 > 0:02:46Sounds EXACTLY like what you'd do.
0:02:46 > 0:02:50I've lost count of the times you've done stuff like this.
0:02:50 > 0:02:54You've crossed the line this time, and it's the last time you ever do.
0:02:54 > 0:02:57Sorry, I didn't quite catch that. It sounded like a...
0:02:57 > 0:02:59COMIC VOICE: "Wah! My name's Dani.
0:02:59 > 0:03:03"I love the sound of my big, flapping gob!"
0:03:03 > 0:03:04Repeat that, mouthy little toad.
0:03:04 > 0:03:08Just remember I'm not so LITTLE any more, shrimp features.
0:03:08 > 0:03:09COME HERE!!!
0:03:18 > 0:03:21BLOWS RASPBERRY
0:03:24 > 0:03:26Come on, Dani, keep up!
0:03:27 > 0:03:29Laters!
0:03:32 > 0:03:36I'm disappointed, Dani. You used to be able to keep pace with me.
0:03:36 > 0:03:39I'll be there in a minute...probably.
0:03:39 > 0:03:42To think, you used to be a challenge. Such a crying shame(!)
0:03:44 > 0:03:46I just need a lie-down.
0:03:46 > 0:03:47What's happened to you(?)
0:03:49 > 0:03:50I'll get you, Max!
0:03:52 > 0:03:56I've been so busy working, I must have let myself go.
0:03:56 > 0:03:58Another doughnut?
0:03:58 > 0:04:03No! This is why I'm unfit. I'm either sat around learning my lines,
0:04:03 > 0:04:06- or stuffing my face with your terrible junk food.- ARGH!
0:04:06 > 0:04:10Ssh! Not in front of my babies! Don't listen to the nasty lady!
0:04:10 > 0:04:14I need to cut out the rubbish and start exercising. I say, "No more!"
0:04:17 > 0:04:20Well, that was a waste of a perfectly good doughnut.
0:04:20 > 0:04:24That bit goes there, that bit goes there. There's a corner piece.
0:04:24 > 0:04:27There's still a bit missing.
0:04:27 > 0:04:30Of course there's a bit missing, it's a doughnut(!)
0:04:30 > 0:04:34Do you still know that personal trainer whose party you DJ'd at?
0:04:34 > 0:04:37You mean Ruby? I've still got her number somewhere.
0:04:37 > 0:04:40- I must warn you. She's pretty intense.- How intense?
0:04:40 > 0:04:43I'm REALLY intense!
0:04:43 > 0:04:46Sorry about that. I don't know what came over me.
0:04:46 > 0:04:49- Hi, I'm Ruby. You must be Dani.- Yup!
0:04:49 > 0:04:52- Jack said you want to get fit? - Do you think you can help?
0:04:52 > 0:04:56I can help. Failure, defeat and losing aren't in my vocabulary.
0:04:56 > 0:05:00Good. Exercise, workout and activity aren't in mine.
0:05:00 > 0:05:01All right, Rubes?
0:05:01 > 0:05:04Whoa! Mr DJ! You're looking at a...
0:05:04 > 0:05:06Don't handle the merchandise.
0:05:06 > 0:05:08Sure it's not you that needs to get fit?
0:05:08 > 0:05:12He's half my problem. I keep picking up on his bad eating habits.
0:05:12 > 0:05:16- Oi! I could start eating healthily any time I wanted.- Prove it!
0:05:16 > 0:05:18Fine. I'll quit eating junk food.
0:05:18 > 0:05:22- As soon as I've finished this bag of crisps.- No, I wouldn't, Jack.
0:05:22 > 0:05:24Blimey! You girls are so bossy.
0:05:24 > 0:05:29- Ruby, I'm bored. I'm hungry. - Dani, this is my sister, Maisy
0:05:29 > 0:05:32Hope you don't mind me looking after her?
0:05:32 > 0:05:35- No problem. - I've seen you in McHurties Hospital.
0:05:35 > 0:05:37- Bit of a fan?- No, it's rubbish. - Maisy!
0:05:37 > 0:05:42- Sorry, Dani. She's got a major attitude problem.- Sounds familiar.
0:05:42 > 0:05:45Hell-o! I'm ten. If I'm to fulfil my potential,
0:05:45 > 0:05:47I need mental stimulation and food.
0:05:47 > 0:05:51Well, the kitchen's through there. You can help yourself.
0:05:51 > 0:05:54But make sure you don't eat anything poisonous(!)
0:05:54 > 0:05:55I'm not a baby(!)
0:05:55 > 0:06:00Let's start by getting you energised, shall we? Pow-pow-pow!
0:06:00 > 0:06:01OK!
0:06:06 > 0:06:08- Who are you?- Who are you?
0:06:08 > 0:06:12The name's Maisy. What are YOU supposed to be?
0:06:12 > 0:06:13Call me Max.
0:06:13 > 0:06:16- What sort of a name is "Maisy"? - What sort of a name is "Max"?
0:06:16 > 0:06:21- It's short for "Maximum Coolness". - Don't you mean "Maximum Lameness"?
0:06:21 > 0:06:22What are you doing here?
0:06:22 > 0:06:25- None of your beeswax. - Yes, it is. It's my house.
0:06:25 > 0:06:26Maybe I've bought it.
0:06:26 > 0:06:27Where d'you get the money?
0:06:27 > 0:06:28Won the lottery.
0:06:28 > 0:06:30- You're lying.- What if I'm not?
0:06:30 > 0:06:32You're too young to play.
0:06:32 > 0:06:33Maybe they changed the rules
0:06:33 > 0:06:36whilst you were too busy sniffing your armpits to notice.
0:06:36 > 0:06:38You can't talk to me like that.
0:06:38 > 0:06:42I am Max. I demand to know what you're doing here.
0:06:42 > 0:06:44Fine. My stupid older sister brought me here
0:06:44 > 0:06:47while she works with that so-called actress.
0:06:47 > 0:06:51That so-called actress is my so-called sister.
0:06:51 > 0:06:53So, we've both got rubbish older sisters.
0:06:53 > 0:06:56Interesting.
0:06:57 > 0:06:59Jack, what are you doing?
0:06:59 > 0:07:01Dani and Ruby don't think I can eat healthily.
0:07:01 > 0:07:03I'm going to show them I can.
0:07:03 > 0:07:05I can't have any temptation.
0:07:05 > 0:07:09From now on, just call me the Saladmeister.
0:07:11 > 0:07:13Actually, don't ever call me the Saladmeister.
0:07:15 > 0:07:17How would you like a challenge?
0:07:17 > 0:07:20I'm listening.
0:07:20 > 0:07:22First one to make the Saladmeister eat junk food wins.
0:07:22 > 0:07:26- What's the prize? - How about our watches?
0:07:26 > 0:07:28Yours is rather nice.
0:07:28 > 0:07:31A Timechecker 3000, if I'm not mistaken.
0:07:31 > 0:07:36It's not up for grabs. How about we play for the satisfaction
0:07:36 > 0:07:40- of knowing who's the bigger genius? - You're on.
0:07:40 > 0:07:43We should start off with a basic cardio workout.
0:07:43 > 0:07:46Five minute gentle jog on the spot to warm you up.
0:07:46 > 0:07:49Followed by some ball squats and lunges, followed by...
0:07:49 > 0:07:52GO ON!! Rip his head off, mangle him!
0:07:52 > 0:07:55- Dani? - Sorry, got a bit caught up in that.
0:07:55 > 0:07:57- You like wrestling? - It's the first time I've watched it.
0:07:57 > 0:08:01This is my trouble. I'd rather do anything than exercise.
0:08:01 > 0:08:04Watch TV, play video games, surf the 'net,
0:08:04 > 0:08:07play with this bit of fluff on the sofa.
0:08:07 > 0:08:13COMIC VOICE: "Oh! I'm Mr Fluffy Fluff, and I live in Fluffer Town."
0:08:13 > 0:08:17We need find exercise you'll enjoy. You seem to enjoy the wrestling.
0:08:17 > 0:08:19Wrestling?! I can't wrestle, are you serious?
0:08:19 > 0:08:22Majorly serious. Look at this serious face!
0:08:22 > 0:08:24Have you seen a more serious face?
0:08:24 > 0:08:27But what if something happens to MY face? I need it.
0:08:27 > 0:08:30Behind that face lurks a lean, mean WRESTLING machine.
0:08:30 > 0:08:33- Let me hear you say it! - I'm a lean, mean wrestling machine?
0:08:33 > 0:08:35Say it with energy!
0:08:35 > 0:08:37- I'M A WRESTLING MACHINE!- Better.
0:08:37 > 0:08:39You're going to need that energy,
0:08:39 > 0:08:42because I'm entering you into a local wrestling competition.
0:08:42 > 0:08:46- What?- It's perfect. It'll give you something to aim for.
0:08:46 > 0:08:49I can't even fight my way out of a paper bag.
0:08:52 > 0:08:57Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the World Weakling Championship.
0:08:57 > 0:09:01Our first event - fighting your way out of a paper bag.
0:09:01 > 0:09:05Representing Mexico, Rodriguez!
0:09:05 > 0:09:08Ay, ay, ay!
0:09:08 > 0:09:11Representing United States Of America,
0:09:11 > 0:09:14it's Jason "Stick Insect" Skinner!
0:09:14 > 0:09:16Yee-hah!
0:09:16 > 0:09:20Representing United Kingdom, it's Jenny The Dinky.
0:09:20 > 0:09:22All right, mate?
0:09:22 > 0:09:25On the count of three, start fighting your way
0:09:25 > 0:09:27out of the paper bag.
0:09:27 > 0:09:28On three,
0:09:28 > 0:09:29on two,
0:09:29 > 0:09:31on one!
0:09:31 > 0:09:34CROWD CHEERS
0:09:44 > 0:09:47We may be here some time.
0:09:57 > 0:09:59Ah, hey, Jack.
0:09:59 > 0:10:02COMIC VOICE: How are you doing, my old friend?
0:10:02 > 0:10:06Hungry. It's all this healthy eating. I can't eat any...
0:10:06 > 0:10:08All right, don't want your life story.
0:10:08 > 0:10:11Anyway, I have something for you.
0:10:11 > 0:10:13Is it a pony? An edible pony?
0:10:13 > 0:10:17Made out of fresh-covered marshmallows that I could eat?
0:10:17 > 0:10:19I must stop thinking like that.
0:10:19 > 0:10:21- Hey, Jack.- Ah. Maisy, right?
0:10:21 > 0:10:25I was wondering if you'd like a spare, giant lollipop?
0:10:25 > 0:10:28It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen.
0:10:28 > 0:10:30And it's all for you, Jack.
0:10:30 > 0:10:35I want it, I need it. But I can't. I swore I wouldn't.
0:10:35 > 0:10:37But it has your name on it.
0:10:37 > 0:10:39Literally.
0:10:39 > 0:10:44Forget her lolly. I happen to have this life-size replica of your head.
0:10:44 > 0:10:46Made entirely out of chocolate.
0:10:46 > 0:10:49He looks just like me. But even more delicious.
0:10:49 > 0:10:52I didn't think that was possible.
0:10:52 > 0:10:54You know you love chocolate.
0:10:54 > 0:10:57Just think of the lolly, Jack.
0:10:57 > 0:11:01- Mmmm, all sticky and sweet. - Choccy choc.
0:11:01 > 0:11:04Lolly, lolly, lolly.
0:11:04 > 0:11:05Choccy.
0:11:05 > 0:11:07Lolly!
0:11:07 > 0:11:09Choccy!
0:11:09 > 0:11:11No! I can't, I can't.
0:11:11 > 0:11:12I won't.
0:11:12 > 0:11:16I promised I wouldn't. I'm happy eating my...
0:11:16 > 0:11:17salad.
0:11:17 > 0:11:20Time to step things up a bit.
0:11:23 > 0:11:25I look ridiculous!
0:11:25 > 0:11:29You'll get used to it. Hey! I was thinking about names.
0:11:29 > 0:11:34What about Dani Pocalypse? Dani Geddon? Dani Destruction?
0:11:34 > 0:11:35Why can't I keep my own name?
0:11:35 > 0:11:39Wrestlers are meant to inspire fear in their opponents.
0:11:39 > 0:11:43Dani doesn't so much inspire fear as it does..."Meh".
0:11:43 > 0:11:46Check out these guys. Beeferella.
0:11:46 > 0:11:49Stevie Smashtastic.
0:11:49 > 0:11:51The Demolisher.
0:11:51 > 0:11:55I know I came to you for help, but I don't think I'm cut out for it.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57You just need something to aim for.
0:11:57 > 0:12:01That's why I've entered you into...Wrestletasia!!
0:12:01 > 0:12:06We need to ensure you're fit so you don't get hurt.
0:12:06 > 0:12:07I don't want to get hurt!
0:12:07 > 0:12:10Exactly! The tournament's for charity.
0:12:10 > 0:12:14All proceeds go towards the local sanctuary for confused donkeys.
0:12:14 > 0:12:16Confused donkeys?
0:12:16 > 0:12:19DONKEY BRAYS
0:12:19 > 0:12:21Oh, I'm so confused.
0:12:21 > 0:12:23The donkeys are already confused.
0:12:23 > 0:12:27You don't want them to be disappointed too, do you?
0:12:27 > 0:12:30Er, I guess not.
0:12:30 > 0:12:34Which is why I'll push you harder than you've ever been pushed before.
0:12:34 > 0:12:36Now, get pumping iron, girl.
0:12:38 > 0:12:40# Bounce
0:12:40 > 0:12:42# Bounce. #
0:12:45 > 0:12:47Huh!
0:12:49 > 0:12:50# Bounce
0:12:53 > 0:12:54# Bounce. #
0:12:54 > 0:12:57Arghhh!
0:12:57 > 0:12:58# Bounce. #
0:12:59 > 0:13:00Ah! Get off me!
0:13:08 > 0:13:10Oh!!!
0:13:15 > 0:13:16999!
0:13:16 > 0:13:18998!
0:13:18 > 0:13:201,000!
0:13:26 > 0:13:28Huh!
0:13:44 > 0:13:48SIGHS
0:13:50 > 0:13:52Coordinator,
0:13:52 > 0:13:55why do humans continually aspire to change their appearance?
0:13:55 > 0:13:58They're forever trying to improve their physique
0:13:58 > 0:14:00or change their hairstyles or their clothes.
0:14:00 > 0:14:02It's a mystery to me, Coordinator.
0:14:02 > 0:14:07I don't know why they can't just be happy with what they've been given.
0:14:07 > 0:14:08What?
0:14:10 > 0:14:12There's no shame in wanting to look nice.
0:14:16 > 0:14:19BLOWS KISS
0:14:21 > 0:14:25- Hey, Jack.- Dani, you've got to help me. I think I'm seeing things.
0:14:25 > 0:14:28Cakes floating before my eyes, sausages in my milk,
0:14:28 > 0:14:31and I keep seeing this little ice-cream head man.
0:14:31 > 0:14:34He was peering through my bedroom window this morning.
0:14:34 > 0:14:36Aargh! Look! He's followed me here.
0:14:36 > 0:14:39There's no little ice-cream head man, Jack.
0:14:39 > 0:14:42Ohhh! I think I must be going crazy. It's this health kick.
0:14:42 > 0:14:44All I can think about is junk food.
0:14:44 > 0:14:47Chips and ice cream, and ham...
0:14:47 > 0:14:49..burgers.
0:14:49 > 0:14:52Ohhh! It's driving me insane, Dani. I'm seeing hamburger people, man!
0:14:52 > 0:14:55Ruby's been driving me mad, too.
0:14:55 > 0:14:58I thought you're really determined to get fit.
0:14:58 > 0:15:00I know, but it's so boring!
0:15:00 > 0:15:03Between you and me, I've not been training as hard as Ruby thinks.
0:15:03 > 0:15:05She tells me to do 50 press-ups, I'll do 10.
0:15:05 > 0:15:08Hasn't Ruby entered you into Wrestletasia?
0:15:08 > 0:15:10If you're not fit, you'll be annihilated.
0:15:10 > 0:15:12- I know that?!- Morning, guys!
0:15:12 > 0:15:15Today's the big day, Dani. No backing out now.
0:15:15 > 0:15:18- Can I go and play with Max? - Yeah, but don't get in any trouble.
0:15:18 > 0:15:22- As if I would.- Look, Ruby, about the wrestling tournament...
0:15:22 > 0:15:25- You're not thinking of quitting or anything, are you?- No!
0:15:25 > 0:15:28No, never. As if I would.
0:15:28 > 0:15:31Good. Cos think of those poor, confused donkeys.
0:15:33 > 0:15:35I'm so confused.
0:15:35 > 0:15:37I don't want to let down the donkeys, Ruby, really.
0:15:37 > 0:15:40I mean that. It's just that, um, it's, um...
0:15:40 > 0:15:42- You're not ill, are you? - Yes!
0:15:42 > 0:15:44That's it. I completely forgot that
0:15:44 > 0:15:47I was ill with, um, something...itis.
0:15:47 > 0:15:49"Something-itis"?
0:15:49 > 0:15:50No!
0:15:50 > 0:15:54Not something-itis, you know, the other one. Um, thingy.
0:15:54 > 0:15:57Um, thingy thing-thing! It's really contagious.
0:15:57 > 0:16:00- Better put myself into quarantine. - Dani, look.
0:16:00 > 0:16:03I know you're scared, but I wouldn't enter you
0:16:03 > 0:16:06into Wrestletasia if I didn't think you were ready.
0:16:06 > 0:16:08- Yeah, I... - You wanted to get fit, and you have.
0:16:08 > 0:16:11Going out there and winning a wrestling competition
0:16:11 > 0:16:15all for a good cause is your reward. Now, what do you say?
0:16:15 > 0:16:17Are you ready to kick some serious bottom?
0:16:17 > 0:16:19Grrr!
0:16:21 > 0:16:24- You could always run away.- Mmm.
0:16:24 > 0:16:27Jack is weak, and if I'm going to ensure my victory,
0:16:27 > 0:16:31I need more than ordinary snacks and junk food.
0:16:31 > 0:16:33This is why I have devised...
0:16:37 > 0:16:40Doughnutius Maximus.
0:16:40 > 0:16:43The ultimate doughnut.
0:16:43 > 0:16:45- Who are you talking to? - Erm...erm...
0:16:47 > 0:16:51..no-one! I was....erm, singing!
0:16:51 > 0:16:52Yes, singing.
0:16:52 > 0:16:54# I'm singing a song
0:16:54 > 0:16:57# La la la... #
0:16:57 > 0:16:58What are you doing, Max?
0:16:58 > 0:17:01What makes you think I'm doing something?
0:17:01 > 0:17:03I don't know. Your suspicious behaviour?
0:17:03 > 0:17:05Like you're not up to something too.
0:17:05 > 0:17:08Whatever you're planning, however you intend to take Jack
0:17:08 > 0:17:12back to the junk site, I'm going to top it.
0:17:12 > 0:17:13Bring it on.
0:17:13 > 0:17:15I'll bring it on like Donkey Kong!
0:17:15 > 0:17:17Well, you're going down, Maisy.
0:17:17 > 0:17:19You're going down like a massive clown.
0:17:19 > 0:17:21Well, you're going to fail.
0:17:21 > 0:17:23You're going to fail like a stale whale.
0:17:23 > 0:17:25Yeah, well you're going to mess it up.
0:17:25 > 0:17:28You're going to mess it up like a...
0:17:28 > 0:17:29Like a...
0:17:30 > 0:17:32If that's the best you've got,
0:17:32 > 0:17:35then I've already got this challenge sewn up.
0:17:38 > 0:17:42Oh, hang on, just thought of another one. Aw, too late.
0:17:49 > 0:17:53So, here we are. Wrestletasia. Isn't it exciting?!
0:17:53 > 0:17:55That's one word for it.
0:17:55 > 0:17:57You can almost smell the adrenaline.
0:17:57 > 0:17:59There's me thinking it was stale sweat.
0:17:59 > 0:18:02Listen, Ruby, there's something I need to say.
0:18:02 > 0:18:05You don't need to say anything to thank me. Your face says it all.
0:18:05 > 0:18:08- Bet you never thought you'd get here.- Got that right(!)
0:18:08 > 0:18:13- Now we just need to get you a fight. Leave the talking to me.- What? No!
0:18:13 > 0:18:18Ahem. Ladies and gentlemen, if I can have your attention, please?
0:18:18 > 0:18:21May I introduce you to the meanest,
0:18:21 > 0:18:25the most dangerous new wrestler on the circuit,
0:18:25 > 0:18:29- Miss Dani Destruction! - APPLAUSE AND CHEERING
0:18:29 > 0:18:32Who dares step in the the with this powerhouse of chaos?
0:18:32 > 0:18:35She'll take on anyone and tie them up like a pretzel!
0:18:35 > 0:18:38- Oh, yeah?- Yeah!
0:18:38 > 0:18:40She don't look so tough to me.
0:18:40 > 0:18:43Don't be fooled by the unassuming exterior, Beefarella.
0:18:43 > 0:18:47She might not look like much, but on the inside
0:18:47 > 0:18:49she's a powerhouse of carnage!
0:18:49 > 0:18:50Oh, yeah?
0:18:50 > 0:18:53I'll snap her in half like a dry twig!
0:18:53 > 0:18:56Well, she'll...turn you inside out like a sleeping bag.
0:18:56 > 0:18:58I'll crush her like a sock full of marshmallows.
0:18:58 > 0:19:00She'll rip you in half like a slice of bread.
0:19:00 > 0:19:02Grrr!
0:19:02 > 0:19:04You've got yourself a fight, ladies.
0:19:04 > 0:19:07Ruby, what are you doing?! You'll get me into trouble.
0:19:07 > 0:19:10Relax. It's all part of the game. Psyching her out.
0:19:10 > 0:19:11Psyching me out!
0:19:11 > 0:19:15Let's do it. Let's bring on the pain game.
0:19:16 > 0:19:19DANCE MUSIC PLAYS
0:19:19 > 0:19:21I'm finally starting to get used to eating better.
0:19:21 > 0:19:25That smoothie doesn't actually make me want to scratch out my own tongue.
0:19:25 > 0:19:27Right, what can I make next?
0:19:27 > 0:19:30Carrot surprise? Lettuce fantasia?
0:19:30 > 0:19:32Wheatgrass jamboree?
0:19:32 > 0:19:34MUSIC STOPS
0:19:34 > 0:19:37Listen. Can you smell something?
0:19:39 > 0:19:42I'm getting...icing sugar...
0:19:42 > 0:19:44E-numbers...caramel glaze...
0:19:44 > 0:19:47Ohhh!
0:19:47 > 0:19:50A ripe blueberry jam in sweetened batter crust.
0:19:50 > 0:19:53Smells like...smells like...
0:19:53 > 0:19:55Smells like an old friend.
0:19:59 > 0:20:02Ohhh! My beauties.
0:20:02 > 0:20:06My wonderful, naughty, sugary beauties.
0:20:06 > 0:20:10Look at you, you forbidden lovelies.
0:20:10 > 0:20:12Come to them, Jack.
0:20:12 > 0:20:13You know you want to.
0:20:13 > 0:20:15They're all for you.
0:20:15 > 0:20:18Glazed with melted sugar,
0:20:18 > 0:20:23dusted with cinnamon, nutmeg and sprinkles.
0:20:23 > 0:20:26Filled with a blueberry jam
0:20:26 > 0:20:27so pure and sweet,
0:20:27 > 0:20:30it could melt your tear ducts.
0:20:30 > 0:20:34They are indeed the ultimate doughnuts.
0:20:34 > 0:20:37Ohhh! I want you.
0:20:37 > 0:20:39I want to eat you all. I can't resist!
0:20:39 > 0:20:41Oh, Jack...
0:20:45 > 0:20:48I give you the final word in chocolate cake.
0:20:49 > 0:20:52You might as well face it, Max - it's over.
0:20:52 > 0:20:55You're smaller than her, but the work we did on your core muscles
0:20:55 > 0:20:57should mean you're pure strength underneath.
0:20:57 > 0:21:00- I can't do this, Ruby! - Of course you can.
0:21:00 > 0:21:02You'll mash her like a ball of potato.
0:21:02 > 0:21:05You'll crack her like a walnut. You'll punish her like a...
0:21:05 > 0:21:08Stop saying I'll do stuff to her like a something else!
0:21:08 > 0:21:10I'm nowhere near as fit as you think.
0:21:10 > 0:21:13But you've been doing hundreds of sit-ups every day.
0:21:13 > 0:21:15Not even I can do that. I read your fitness diary.
0:21:15 > 0:21:17It's incredible what you've achieved.
0:21:17 > 0:21:19The fitness diary is a load of rubbish.
0:21:19 > 0:21:23- I haven't done half the stuff I said I did.- You lied to me?
0:21:23 > 0:21:25Well, lying's a bit harsh.
0:21:25 > 0:21:28It's more that I decided to portray a false version of the truth.
0:21:28 > 0:21:32- You lied to me.- You kept pushing me and you wouldn't back down.
0:21:32 > 0:21:35You kept hyping me up and insulting Queen Kong over there!
0:21:35 > 0:21:38OK, I'm sorry, but - what are we going to do now?!
0:21:40 > 0:21:42- You can go on instead of me.- What?!
0:21:42 > 0:21:44You're way tougher and fitter.
0:21:44 > 0:21:47But I can't fight instead of you! We haven't registered,
0:21:47 > 0:21:51and...well...we'll be disqualified, and I never lose.
0:21:51 > 0:21:52Then pretend to be me.
0:21:52 > 0:21:55With the mask, no-one'll know we swapped places.
0:21:55 > 0:21:57If I go in there, she's going to shred me
0:21:57 > 0:22:01like a...duvet in a combine harvester. Please.
0:22:01 > 0:22:02OK.
0:22:06 > 0:22:11I used cocoa powder sourced direct from the Amazon basin.
0:22:11 > 0:22:13There are layers of fudge,
0:22:13 > 0:22:16caramel, dark, white and milk chocolate,
0:22:16 > 0:22:19and it's all for you, Jack.
0:22:22 > 0:22:24I'm not stupid. I know what you two are doing.
0:22:24 > 0:22:29You've got some kind of challenge going on. But...but...
0:22:29 > 0:22:34I don't think I'm strong enough to resist. I'm too weak.
0:22:34 > 0:22:36Just take one little bite.
0:22:36 > 0:22:39That's all you need to do.
0:22:39 > 0:22:41One tiny bit and the pain'll stop.
0:22:41 > 0:22:43Where's the harm in that?
0:22:43 > 0:22:45Don't listen to her, Jack!
0:22:45 > 0:22:47Try one of my doughnuts.
0:22:47 > 0:22:51You know how much you love doughnuts, don't you?
0:22:51 > 0:22:53They'll solve all your problems.
0:22:53 > 0:22:55It's the cake you want, Jack.
0:22:55 > 0:22:59- It's the doughnuts. - You know you want them both, Jack.
0:22:59 > 0:23:02But which one are you going to eat first?
0:23:02 > 0:23:04Which is it going to be?
0:23:04 > 0:23:08DRAMATIC MUSIC
0:23:11 > 0:23:13RUBY SCREAMS
0:23:13 > 0:23:16Maybe this wasn't a good idea.
0:23:16 > 0:23:18Just keep out of her reach. Look out!
0:23:21 > 0:23:24Stop running away, that's cheating!
0:23:26 > 0:23:27Grrr!
0:23:27 > 0:23:29RUBY SCREAMS BELL RINGS
0:23:29 > 0:23:32That's it! You only have to keep that up for another 12 rounds.
0:23:32 > 0:23:35BELL RINGS Grrr!
0:23:35 > 0:23:39You don't have to beat her, you just have to survive until the end.
0:23:39 > 0:23:42- RUBY SCREAMS - Do it for the confused donkeys!
0:23:54 > 0:23:55Aaargh!
0:23:56 > 0:23:58Grrr!
0:23:59 > 0:24:02Which is it going to be, Jack?
0:24:02 > 0:24:03Well, Jack?
0:24:05 > 0:24:07- Neither.- Neither?!
0:24:07 > 0:24:08Nope.
0:24:08 > 0:24:10I'm going to have this instead.
0:24:10 > 0:24:12But you love junk food!
0:24:12 > 0:24:15Yeah, but I also love fresh fruit and veg now.
0:24:15 > 0:24:18All that rubbish I used to eat must have dulled my taste buds.
0:24:18 > 0:24:21I never realised how good this stuff actually was.
0:24:21 > 0:24:23Sorry, guys.
0:24:23 > 0:24:24Eurgh, is that a worm?!
0:24:24 > 0:24:26What?! Where? Eurgh!
0:24:27 > 0:24:28Got ya.
0:24:31 > 0:24:32Aaarrghhh!
0:24:32 > 0:24:34Time out!
0:24:34 > 0:24:37- What?- I can't do this. - You're not Dani Destruction.
0:24:37 > 0:24:40No. I'm her trainer. There's Dani.
0:24:41 > 0:24:42What's going on?
0:24:42 > 0:24:46Long story short - I really don't want to fight you. So, I forfeit.
0:24:46 > 0:24:49CROWD BOOS You forfeit?
0:24:49 > 0:24:51Yep. I throw in the towel.
0:24:51 > 0:24:53I wave the white flag. Call it quits?
0:24:53 > 0:24:56There's no harm in admitting I'm slightly scared right now.
0:24:56 > 0:24:58But I wanted a fight, you massive chicken.
0:24:58 > 0:25:00OK, fine! I'm a chicken.
0:25:00 > 0:25:02So what? At least I'm not a...
0:25:02 > 0:25:05gorilla!
0:25:05 > 0:25:07What did you call me?!
0:25:07 > 0:25:09Aaargh!
0:25:11 > 0:25:12Time to go.
0:25:12 > 0:25:15- What about the confused donkeys? - Stuff the confused donkeys!
0:25:16 > 0:25:18I'm still so confused.
0:25:18 > 0:25:21So. Looks like neither of us won the challenge.
0:25:21 > 0:25:24- But you played the game well, Max. - As did you.
0:25:24 > 0:25:27- I look forward to our next meeting. - As do I.- Bye, then.
0:25:30 > 0:25:31- Maisy?- Yeah?
0:25:31 > 0:25:35- My watch.- You're good, Max.
0:25:37 > 0:25:41I've a feeling this is going to be the start of a beautiful battle.
0:25:42 > 0:25:45- What is that? - Sprouting cabbage smoothie.
0:25:45 > 0:25:48They're delish! You should try one. BREAKS WIND
0:25:48 > 0:25:51- Eurgh!- There may be one or two side effects.
0:25:51 > 0:25:52We'll manage without.
0:25:52 > 0:25:55So, you didn't tell me how you got on at Wrestletasia.
0:25:55 > 0:25:58We came away with our heads held high.
0:25:58 > 0:26:01And still attached to our bodies.
0:26:01 > 0:26:04BREAKS WIND Eurgh, Jack!
0:26:04 > 0:26:06- It's bad, isn't it?- Eurgh! - Oh, that is really nasty.
0:26:09 > 0:26:11- Ha! It's marvellous.- So...
0:26:11 > 0:26:14Have you prepared the checklist of everything we've learned
0:26:14 > 0:26:16from Dani's House this week?
0:26:16 > 0:26:18Indeed I have, Coordinator Zang.
0:26:18 > 0:26:22Firstly, humans find physical violence and farting entertaining.
0:26:22 > 0:26:26Secondly, some humans prefer eating food that harms their bodies,
0:26:26 > 0:26:30and thirdly, wrestling costumes are very, very unflattering.
0:26:30 > 0:26:32I beg to differ!
0:26:32 > 0:26:34SHE LAUGHS
0:26:34 > 0:26:38What? I think it rather suits me.
0:26:40 > 0:26:41Feel the steel!
0:26:41 > 0:26:43Ow!
0:26:43 > 0:26:45That really stung.
0:26:45 > 0:26:47SHE LAUGHS
0:27:05 > 0:27:08- A human. What's that thing? - It's a caravan.- And what am I?
0:27:08 > 0:27:10- You're a donkey!- What are you?
0:27:10 > 0:27:15- Human. Donkey.- Human.- Donkey.
0:27:15 > 0:27:16I'm so confused.