0:00:02 > 0:00:04SLURP!
0:00:04 > 0:00:10New directive from on high. All coordinators to get in shape.
0:00:10 > 0:00:12But we're already in shape! Pear-shape.
0:00:12 > 0:00:15BEEPING AND WHIRRING
0:00:15 > 0:00:18- Ohhhh.- They sent us these.
0:00:18 > 0:00:21They're called dumbbells.
0:00:21 > 0:00:22I can't hear them ringing.
0:00:22 > 0:00:26- That's not the idea. You're meant to lift them up.- Why?
0:00:26 > 0:00:29All right, then. Mmmrh!
0:00:29 > 0:00:34SHE STRAINS Well, this one must be welded down.
0:00:34 > 0:00:36Don't be ridiculous. Let me try.
0:00:38 > 0:00:41No, I suppose you're right, actually.
0:00:41 > 0:00:44- Shall we try one of the smaller ones to start?- Good idea.
0:00:47 > 0:00:51Oh, don't just stand there! Help me!
0:00:51 > 0:00:52Ah! A-a-ah!
0:00:55 > 0:00:59Ya-a-ay! We did it. We got fit!
0:00:59 > 0:01:01And now we can sit and watch Dani's House!
0:01:01 > 0:01:04What? Wa-a-a-ah!
0:01:06 > 0:01:09Hey, guys! My name's Dani, and this...
0:01:09 > 0:01:10..is her best friend Jack!
0:01:10 > 0:01:12Thanks. My name's Dani, and this...
0:01:12 > 0:01:13..is her brother Max!
0:01:13 > 0:01:14And his best friend, Ben!
0:01:14 > 0:01:16As I was saying, my name's Dani, and this...
0:01:16 > 0:01:18..is her friend, Ruby!
0:01:18 > 0:01:20And I'm her sister, Maisy.
0:01:20 > 0:01:22And I'm Dani, and this is the brilliant...
0:01:22 > 0:01:24ALL SPEAK AT ONCE
0:01:24 > 0:01:26WHISTLE SCREECHES
0:01:34 > 0:01:37It's just so tough being a doctor sometimes.
0:01:38 > 0:01:41I know! I'll be more help once I've got over this mystery illness
0:01:41 > 0:01:44that's put me in this wheelchair.
0:01:44 > 0:01:48That's just it! There's no easy way of saying this.
0:01:49 > 0:01:51You may never walk again.
0:01:51 > 0:01:56I'm sure you'd like a moment alone. Also, I'm late for golf.
0:01:58 > 0:02:02He doesn't even know that I love him. How can I tell him now?
0:02:02 > 0:02:03Cut.
0:02:06 > 0:02:10Hey, guys! I have got this meaty new storyline. Mystery Illness.
0:02:10 > 0:02:12I'm going to have everyone in floods of tears.
0:02:12 > 0:02:14I'm on wheels! My life is over!
0:02:14 > 0:02:19I'll have to get a job as a...supermarket trolley!
0:02:20 > 0:02:22- Catch you later.- Err, excuse me.
0:02:22 > 0:02:25I hope you're not making fun out of people in wheelchairs,
0:02:25 > 0:02:27and I'd prefer it if you didn't ride in mine.
0:02:27 > 0:02:29I know it's tempting, but...
0:02:31 > 0:02:33I am so sorry. I didn't realise...
0:02:33 > 0:02:36No, it's OK. Honestly.
0:02:36 > 0:02:39- So, what do you do? - I'm the new runner.- Oh.
0:02:39 > 0:02:41Or I guess, technically, a wheeler.
0:02:42 > 0:02:45- Aww, this tea is terrible! - And I make the tea.
0:02:46 > 0:02:48- I'm Fern.- Dani.
0:02:48 > 0:02:53So am I really that terrible? I mean, with the wheelchair acting?
0:02:53 > 0:02:54No! Well, a bit.
0:02:54 > 0:02:57Oh, I feel like an idiot. Have you got any pointers?
0:02:57 > 0:03:01You just need some practice. Why not take it home for the weekend?
0:03:01 > 0:03:04- It's a thought, I guess.- And if you really want to know what it's like,
0:03:04 > 0:03:06- don't let on you're faking. - You mean lie?
0:03:06 > 0:03:09Think of it as going undercover.
0:03:09 > 0:03:12- I bet you'll be surprised what you find.- I don't know.
0:03:12 > 0:03:15Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were a serious actor.
0:03:15 > 0:03:17No, it's OK. I'll do it.
0:03:17 > 0:03:20Outstanding. Good luck, Agent Dani.
0:03:20 > 0:03:24Mission Improbable. I'm sure Jack and Rubes'll be fine with it.
0:03:24 > 0:03:26BOTH: A-a-a-a-a-agh!
0:03:26 > 0:03:29- OK, OK, calm down. - Dani, you're in a wheelchair!
0:03:29 > 0:03:32- Top marks for observation. - Oh, man, this is terrible!
0:03:32 > 0:03:33How can you be so cool about this?
0:03:33 > 0:03:37She's in denial. Right, what are the seven stages of grief?
0:03:37 > 0:03:41Denial, rage, sloth, avarice, gluttony...
0:03:41 > 0:03:44Aren't they the Seven Deadly Sins? Anyway, it's OK.
0:03:44 > 0:03:47I'm just prac... I mean, this is just temporary.
0:03:47 > 0:03:49- Oh, thank goodness. - So, what happened?
0:03:49 > 0:03:52- Well, it's not permanent. - Right. That's what "temporary" means.
0:03:52 > 0:03:56It happened at work. I fell off a...gurney.
0:03:56 > 0:03:59You fell off a big ugly fish? Of all the rotten luck!
0:03:59 > 0:04:01That's a gurnard, Jack.
0:04:01 > 0:04:04Yeah, I broke all my toes. Freak accident.
0:04:04 > 0:04:07They want me to use this for a few days as a precaution.
0:04:07 > 0:04:10Oh, Dani, I'm so sorry. We'll look after you, won't we, Jack?
0:04:10 > 0:04:13- Anything we can do for you now? - Oh, well...
0:04:13 > 0:04:16- I could murder a banana smoothie. - On it!
0:04:16 > 0:04:17And a head massage?
0:04:20 > 0:04:22This is going to be a piece of cake!
0:04:23 > 0:04:28Whoa, it's like Tutankhamen's tomb in here.
0:04:28 > 0:04:32Yeah, if Tutankhamen wore superhero pants.
0:04:34 > 0:04:37Completely untouched for thousands of years.
0:04:37 > 0:04:40- More like a couple of months. - Don't touch anything!
0:04:40 > 0:04:44Max asked me to check and make sure his stuff was just like he left it.
0:04:44 > 0:04:47It's like he left it, all right! Dried-on Sugar Pops.
0:04:47 > 0:04:49The strongest glue known to man.
0:04:49 > 0:04:53Look, it's Max's old laptop.
0:04:54 > 0:04:57Hey, have you seen his video? It's got over a million hits
0:04:57 > 0:04:58and still counting.
0:04:58 > 0:05:01# Open for business, you don't want to miss this
0:05:01 > 0:05:03# Be smart, don't be stupid
0:05:03 > 0:05:05# And call me Cupid
0:05:05 > 0:05:07# Break it down, now. #
0:05:07 > 0:05:10Have you seen some of his fan sites? They're rabid!
0:05:10 > 0:05:14- They even pay for his autograph. - Too bad he didn't sign his pants.
0:05:14 > 0:05:20Wait! You may have just had your first good idea ever!
0:05:20 > 0:05:22Did I? What was it?
0:05:22 > 0:05:25What if there were Max fan boys out there who want all this junk?
0:05:25 > 0:05:27No. No way. I swore a sacred oath to Max
0:05:27 > 0:05:29that I would look after his stuff
0:05:29 > 0:05:32- and make sure no-one touched it. - They might pay us money for it.
0:05:32 > 0:05:33OK, let's do it.
0:05:33 > 0:05:35SLURP!
0:05:35 > 0:05:39If I'd known research was this easy, I'd have done it more often.
0:05:39 > 0:05:42- They're waiting on me hand and wheel!- Hey! How's Dani?
0:05:42 > 0:05:44Fine. She's settled down in front of the telly.
0:05:44 > 0:05:47- Cool. Lunch is nearly ready. - Great. I expect she's hungry.
0:05:47 > 0:05:51Er, hello! I'm not a hologram, I am actually in this room.
0:05:51 > 0:05:55- No way! Last night?!- Huh? What?
0:05:55 > 0:05:56Oh!
0:05:57 > 0:06:01SHOUTING: Jack was saying that Jeff, Jack's old mate, asked me out.
0:06:01 > 0:06:04But she said no cos he's a plank.
0:06:04 > 0:06:07Yeah, all right, I'm not deaf and I haven't lost 50 IQ points,
0:06:07 > 0:06:09- just cos I'm in the chair! - Sorry, mate.
0:06:09 > 0:06:11Right. That was thoughtless of us.
0:06:11 > 0:06:13- TV PLAYS - Oh, I love this show.
0:06:13 > 0:06:15Well, lunch should be ready by now.
0:06:17 > 0:06:21- Err, excuse me! I was watching that! - I know, but it's din-dins time.
0:06:21 > 0:06:25It's like being in a rest home run by robots.
0:06:29 > 0:06:33- Here...you...are. We hope you like the...- Por...ridge.
0:06:33 > 0:06:36For the 100th time, I hate porridge.
0:06:36 > 0:06:39It's disgusting and slimy and it tastes of sick.
0:06:39 > 0:06:44- We're glad you like the... - Por...ridge. Have some more porridge.
0:06:44 > 0:06:47- Would you like to watch... - Antiques Auction?
0:06:47 > 0:06:49I can't stand Antiques Auction.
0:06:49 > 0:06:52Can't I watch Space Pirates Of Saturn?
0:06:52 > 0:06:57- We're sorry. Space Pirates of Saturn is too...- Exciting.
0:06:57 > 0:07:02- Noisy.- It would be better for you to watch Antiques Auction.
0:07:04 > 0:07:11R-r-r-r-r-r! Malfunction! Malfunction! System error! R-r-r-r!
0:07:14 > 0:07:18Time to watch Space Pirates Of Saturn. Ahh.
0:07:20 > 0:07:23The biggest Max fan site on the web.
0:07:23 > 0:07:27Crispy! Look at the prices fans are paying for posters and T-shirts.
0:07:27 > 0:07:31Think how much more they're going to pay for genuine Max memorabilia.
0:07:31 > 0:07:35Yeah, like this Super Soaker...
0:07:35 > 0:07:38- SQUELCH! - ..filled with jam.
0:07:39 > 0:07:41There's tons here.
0:07:41 > 0:07:43Like a museum-full.
0:07:43 > 0:07:48Now that really is genius. A museum of Max.
0:07:48 > 0:07:50What? We sell his stuff to a museum?
0:07:50 > 0:07:53No! We ARE the museum.
0:07:53 > 0:07:57We charge fans loads to get in with all our Max stuff and exhibits.
0:07:57 > 0:08:01You mean MY Max stuff. He is my cousin.
0:08:01 > 0:08:02You were just about to flog it.
0:08:02 > 0:08:05Fine! But I have to be the tour guide.
0:08:06 > 0:08:10- Is it just me, or does Dani seem a little grumpy?- I know what you mean.
0:08:10 > 0:08:13- It's probably being in that chair. - As long as it's not us.
0:08:13 > 0:08:16Of course not. We're treating her like the same old Dani.
0:08:16 > 0:08:20Oh, look what I found in the shop to cheer her up.
0:08:20 > 0:08:24A nice hat. A shawl and some other little things.
0:08:24 > 0:08:27Oh, she's going to love 'em. Wait a sec.
0:08:27 > 0:08:3016p? That's got to be some kind of mistake, right?
0:08:30 > 0:08:35- No, it's from a charity shop.- Really?
0:08:36 > 0:08:40I am coming. Sorry it's taking me like 19 years!
0:08:42 > 0:08:45Hi! I couldn't resist, to see how you were getting on.
0:08:45 > 0:08:49Oh, I'm doing great. How did you get here?
0:08:49 > 0:08:52Oh, I rolled all the way from my house. Lucky it's downhill.
0:08:52 > 0:08:54Really?
0:08:54 > 0:08:58- No. I came in my car. - You've got a car? Wicked!
0:09:00 > 0:09:04- Do you mind me asking what happened to you?- No, it's OK.
0:09:04 > 0:09:09I was swimming off Bondi Beach, and this little girl fell off a pedalo.
0:09:09 > 0:09:13And that's when I heard someone shout, "Shark!"
0:09:13 > 0:09:14Whoa!
0:09:14 > 0:09:22And then I saw this giant fin getting closer and closer,
0:09:22 > 0:09:25so of course I swam over and I lifted the little girl up
0:09:25 > 0:09:29and her dad grabbed her, and he tried to pull me out, but...
0:09:31 > 0:09:33Wow, that really happened?
0:09:33 > 0:09:36No, I just made it all up now!
0:09:36 > 0:09:37Urgh!
0:09:37 > 0:09:41No, I was running after my mate, and when I wasn't looking,
0:09:41 > 0:09:43I got hit by a van. It was my fault.
0:09:43 > 0:09:47- That's awful. You had me going, though.- Sorry. I couldn't resist.
0:09:47 > 0:09:50Anyway, how are your friends coping with you being in a wheelchair?
0:09:50 > 0:09:53Well, not too bad, I guess.
0:09:53 > 0:09:55I'm totally there for Dani.
0:09:55 > 0:09:58She'd do the same if it was me who was helpless.
0:09:58 > 0:10:00So, were you there when Dani had her accident?
0:10:00 > 0:10:04- Umm, yeah.- Really? How did it happen?
0:10:04 > 0:10:06Oh, i-i-it was terrible.
0:10:06 > 0:10:09So terrible I've kind of blotted it out of my mind.
0:10:09 > 0:10:12How have I never been to a charity shop before?
0:10:12 > 0:10:15The vintage one, it's wicked! Can you believe this suit was only 50p?
0:10:15 > 0:10:16- Yeah.- Not a problem.
0:10:16 > 0:10:19Actually, I think you were overcharged.
0:10:19 > 0:10:22- Jack, meet Fern. - Oh, hi, Fern.
0:10:22 > 0:10:24You guys have seriously got to come see this shop.
0:10:24 > 0:10:29I adore vintage clothes, but the access in that place is terrible.
0:10:29 > 0:10:30I can go for you, if you like?
0:10:30 > 0:10:34That's OK, I'd rather see for myself. It's just so annoying.
0:10:34 > 0:10:37It's like everything's designed to be difficult.
0:10:37 > 0:10:40They're not like that on purpose. It's just the way things are.
0:10:41 > 0:10:43Well, if we can't get our wheelchairs in,
0:10:43 > 0:10:47- maybe you should boycott them till they sort it out?- What?
0:10:47 > 0:10:51Oh, yeah. I'll give that some thought.
0:10:51 > 0:10:56Just after I have one last quick whizz around.
0:10:56 > 0:10:59I'll come too. See if I can get them to take that suit back.
0:10:59 > 0:11:02Sorry about Jack. He's not exactly Mr Tact.
0:11:02 > 0:11:04It's OK. I'd rather people say what they were thinking anyway.
0:11:04 > 0:11:06We need to teach him a lesson.
0:11:06 > 0:11:09There's something I've always wanted to do, just for a laugh.
0:11:09 > 0:11:11Here's one for you.
0:11:11 > 0:11:14- Thank you. Right, go in, go. - I'll take five!
0:11:17 > 0:11:20- But there's only one of you. - They're for souvenirs.- OK.
0:11:24 > 0:11:27Welcome to the Museum of Max.
0:11:27 > 0:11:29This is the actual room where Max wrote the lyrics
0:11:29 > 0:11:33for I Hate Breathing Air on the back of his dog.
0:11:33 > 0:11:36- Max never had a dog.- Oh, didn't he?
0:11:36 > 0:11:39Well, here we have the cereal Max was eating
0:11:39 > 0:11:42while he wrote Voodoo Goldfish.
0:11:42 > 0:11:43ALL: Woo-oo!
0:11:43 > 0:11:46Didn't Max write that song on a trip to the aquarium?
0:11:46 > 0:11:48So, you're the Max-pert now?
0:11:48 > 0:11:49Yeah, I'm president of the Max Fan Club.
0:11:49 > 0:11:52Well, I've got one thing to say to you.
0:11:52 > 0:11:56Er...welcome to our museum, Mr President.
0:11:56 > 0:12:00- Check these out! - ALL: Woo-oo-oo!
0:12:00 > 0:12:05Now, Max's most-prized possession.
0:12:05 > 0:12:08- A signed picture of me! - ALL: Ooh-errr!
0:12:08 > 0:12:12I taught him his best dance moves, like the backwards moonslider.
0:12:13 > 0:12:17This is rubbish! He doesn't know anything about Max, or his pants!
0:12:17 > 0:12:18We want our money back!
0:12:18 > 0:12:21ALL: We want our money back!
0:12:21 > 0:12:24Nice one, doofus!
0:12:24 > 0:12:29Why is that charity shop not mobbed? I got all this for under ten quid.
0:12:29 > 0:12:30Ten quid!
0:12:30 > 0:12:33How I managed to finally get you out of there I'll never know!
0:12:33 > 0:12:35- I'm dying for a cuppa. - Tea? Oh, yes, please!
0:12:35 > 0:12:40OK...weird. Dani? D'you want a cup of tea?
0:12:40 > 0:12:41Got some! Bring a mug.
0:12:41 > 0:12:45- Where are all the mugs? - That's a little bit strange.
0:12:47 > 0:12:54Oh! Who's nicked all the chairs? Urgh! Why's the table so low?
0:12:54 > 0:12:58A-agh! A fridge with no handle. My ultimate nightmare.
0:12:58 > 0:13:00Check down low.
0:13:07 > 0:13:08Have I got taller recently?
0:13:11 > 0:13:14- Found them, then?- Eventually!
0:13:14 > 0:13:17- Take a seat.- Eh?
0:13:24 > 0:13:28- Is it just me or does this tea taste weird?- I made it.
0:13:28 > 0:13:33A-agh! A-agh, that's a bit of a menace.
0:13:33 > 0:13:37- And this was on the door to the loo. - "Disabled toilet only"?!
0:13:37 > 0:13:40- It's OK. You can use the one in the caff down the road.- Oh!
0:13:40 > 0:13:42What's going on? Why is everything so awkward?
0:13:42 > 0:13:44But it's not like that on purpose.
0:13:44 > 0:13:47Yeah, it's just the way things are.
0:13:47 > 0:13:50Yeah, OK. I get your point.
0:13:53 > 0:13:56U-u-urgh! I'm sorry, but that is rank!
0:13:56 > 0:14:00He really isn't Mr Tact!
0:14:02 > 0:14:06I'm very tactful. I hardly ever tell you what a weed you are.
0:14:06 > 0:14:08Wow!
0:14:08 > 0:14:11Ha! Just getting into shape. Easy, really, when you know how.
0:14:14 > 0:14:17- Fancy a lizard?- Thanks very much.
0:14:17 > 0:14:21- Ah-ha!- Oops.- How's it staying up there? Anti-gravity field?
0:14:21 > 0:14:23No, string.
0:14:28 > 0:14:30If I don't nail this storyline,
0:14:30 > 0:14:33- I'm going to be a laughing stock on national telly.- Relax.
0:14:33 > 0:14:37Let's read the script. I'm sure the writers avoided any obvious cliches.
0:14:37 > 0:14:44"Nurse Woodmagnet, I think you're really brave."
0:14:44 > 0:14:49Ooh, next stunning line. "Poor you. How are you adjusting?"
0:14:49 > 0:14:53Well, this is the lever for the footrest and this is the brake.
0:14:53 > 0:14:56This is my new look. What do you think I should call it?
0:14:56 > 0:15:00Err...how about, Shot By The Clothes Gun?
0:15:00 > 0:15:02Ahh, that's not Fern's, is it?
0:15:02 > 0:15:06- Jack, I think you're being a bit off with Fern.- No, I really like her.
0:15:06 > 0:15:10- Just not her tea.- Still, you should be more sensitive.
0:15:10 > 0:15:12Now, go see her and make nice.
0:15:12 > 0:15:16Ooh, here's a juicy bit. You're on about this new paramedic you fancy.
0:15:16 > 0:15:17Yeah?
0:15:17 > 0:15:22"I know we just met, but he's so gorgeous!
0:15:22 > 0:15:25"Be careful. I don't want you getting hurt.
0:15:25 > 0:15:28"You mean how a mysterious illness has landed me in this chair?
0:15:28 > 0:15:31"He needs time to get to know you.
0:15:31 > 0:15:35"But I just want to grab his ears and...snog him!"
0:15:35 > 0:15:40- Honestly, this dialogue!- Who in their right mind would believe it?
0:15:40 > 0:15:43Fern wants to grab me by the ears and snog me!
0:15:43 > 0:15:45What?! Awww!
0:15:45 > 0:15:48You're good at reading my part. I should watch out.
0:15:48 > 0:15:51Oh, no! I couldn't do acting.
0:15:51 > 0:15:53I'd like to be in front of the camera, though, like a presenter.
0:15:53 > 0:15:56You'd be ace, but presenting what?
0:15:56 > 0:15:58Well, not cooking, that's for sure.
0:15:59 > 0:16:03Thanks for coming back. I'm Maisy. We just wanted feedback on how
0:16:03 > 0:16:04we can make our Max-seum better.
0:16:04 > 0:16:08- Well, you could get a new tour guide.- Get a life.
0:16:08 > 0:16:11We plan to replace him with earphones. Please, do go on.
0:16:11 > 0:16:16Well, the pants, the cereal, the Super Soaker, it's all good.
0:16:16 > 0:16:20I mean, when I think Max actually touched...
0:16:20 > 0:16:22Oi, hands off! This stuff's ours.
0:16:22 > 0:16:25Fine! But it's not enough, you need a killer exhibit.
0:16:25 > 0:16:27You need therapy.
0:16:27 > 0:16:29Wait! Erm...
0:16:32 > 0:16:35- We've got a killer exhibit! - What is it?
0:16:35 > 0:16:39- It's Max's actual sister. - No way!- Way!
0:16:39 > 0:16:42All I'm saying is next time you see her, just try...
0:16:45 > 0:16:48Pull yourself together!
0:16:51 > 0:16:57Hey, Fern. Erm...look, I'm sorry if I came across a little, like...
0:16:59 > 0:17:02- ..insensitive. - It's not a problem.- Good.
0:17:03 > 0:17:07Oh, and another thing. No offence, but you're not really my type.
0:17:07 > 0:17:10- Excuse me?- Oh, I just didn't want to hurt your feelings.
0:17:10 > 0:17:12In case you were going to ask me out.
0:17:12 > 0:17:14I wasn't. What are you on about?
0:17:14 > 0:17:16I heard you talking to Dani about me.
0:17:16 > 0:17:18I only said you're not Mr Tact.
0:17:18 > 0:17:19Understatement of the decade!
0:17:19 > 0:17:22You don't want to hold me up by the ears and snog me, then?
0:17:22 > 0:17:28- Jack!- Oh, wait. I get it! We were reading Dani's script.
0:17:28 > 0:17:31- Script!- Yeah, for McHurties.
0:17:31 > 0:17:36Ohh, no, no, no, no, I was talking about something else.
0:17:36 > 0:17:38I'm going to go! Two seconds!
0:17:41 > 0:17:45- Aww, he really hasn't got it yet, has he?- No!
0:17:45 > 0:17:47The Museum of Ma...
0:17:53 > 0:17:58- So weird!- It really is you! D'you mind if I take your picture?
0:17:58 > 0:17:59Sure, why not?
0:18:01 > 0:18:04The jewel of the crown, Max's actual sister.
0:18:08 > 0:18:11She and Max built sandcastles in Skegness together in 2003.
0:18:11 > 0:18:14- No, I think it was Cleethorpes, actually.- No, Skeggie.
0:18:14 > 0:18:16Well, I should know, so...
0:18:19 > 0:18:22See? I told you it was, erm...Skegness.
0:18:22 > 0:18:26I know everything about Max, and Max's sister.
0:18:26 > 0:18:29- Look, I am Max's sister, you little twerp.- You're so lucky.
0:18:29 > 0:18:32Must be great to know a big star before they're famous.
0:18:32 > 0:18:34When they first got their inspiration.
0:18:34 > 0:18:40Wa-a-ah, ooh, a-a-ah!
0:18:40 > 0:18:43- Woo-hoo!- Stefani, darling.
0:18:43 > 0:18:46I'm not called Stefani any more, Papa.
0:18:46 > 0:18:47I've changed my name to Lady Gaga.
0:18:47 > 0:18:51Lady Gaga?! That's ridiculous!
0:18:51 > 0:18:55Well, I might as well change my name to Papa Razzi!
0:18:55 > 0:18:58Stop playing around and do your homework!
0:19:01 > 0:19:05You think you can just dance your way through life?!
0:19:05 > 0:19:07It's not my fault I was born this way!
0:19:09 > 0:19:12I'm calling your teacher. Where's your telephone?
0:19:12 > 0:19:13Now, Mother, calm down.
0:19:13 > 0:19:17Oh, but she makes me so cross! I just want to poke her face!
0:19:18 > 0:19:22Mama, Papa, look. I did a drawing.
0:19:22 > 0:19:25Ohh, that's great, sweetie. What is it?
0:19:25 > 0:19:30It's an All-E-Hand-Row...sorry.
0:19:33 > 0:19:35Yes!
0:19:35 > 0:19:37Five-five!
0:19:37 > 0:19:39It could go either way now.
0:19:39 > 0:19:41I told you I knew more about Max's sister than you do.
0:19:41 > 0:19:43Well, the quiz isn't over yet.
0:19:43 > 0:19:47Final question. Max's favourite sandwich filling...
0:19:47 > 0:19:50- Liver and chocolate spread! - ..is liver and chocolate spread.
0:19:50 > 0:19:55- Oh.- But what is Dani's?- Oh!
0:19:55 > 0:19:58You've already answered! It's Dani's turn!
0:19:58 > 0:20:01Err...erm...cheese and...no! Egg mayo! Egg mayo!
0:20:01 > 0:20:04Is right! Dani wins!
0:20:04 > 0:20:07Yes! Ah-ha-ha-ha! In your face! I knew I knew more about me than you!
0:20:07 > 0:20:11Ha-ha-ha! Do-do-do-do! What?
0:20:14 > 0:20:18Oh, right. Nobody tell Jack and Ruby about this, OK?
0:20:23 > 0:20:26Dani's having us on. I saw her walking around just now.
0:20:26 > 0:20:28What?! After all the things we've done for her!
0:20:28 > 0:20:31Her story has more holes in it than my old gym socks!
0:20:31 > 0:20:35And she made us feel guilty. Ho-ho! It's time for some serious payback!
0:20:35 > 0:20:37- Mmm-hmm. - I say glue her to her chair!
0:20:37 > 0:20:40Nah, glueing's too good for her. I've got a better idea.
0:20:40 > 0:20:43Your new attitude is so inspiring.
0:20:43 > 0:20:45Some people might think I'm being a pain in the neck.
0:20:45 > 0:20:48Oww! But that's just how things change.
0:20:48 > 0:20:51Exactly. That's what I was saying to my friend who writes
0:20:51 > 0:20:53for Personal Trainer Monthly.
0:20:53 > 0:20:56Using a wheelchair doesn't mean you've lost IQ points
0:20:56 > 0:20:58or that you're helpless, or that you're really brave.
0:20:58 > 0:21:00- It's just a way of getting around.- Exactly.
0:21:00 > 0:21:04- Good! So, you'll do the interview? - Err, what interview?
0:21:04 > 0:21:06With my friend. Spread the word.
0:21:06 > 0:21:07But you said you told him, so...
0:21:07 > 0:21:10Oh, but it'll mean so much more coming from you.
0:21:10 > 0:21:12- I'll bring him over tomorrow.- Err...
0:21:12 > 0:21:16This museum idea of mine was pure genius.
0:21:16 > 0:21:18I'm so glad I came up with it.
0:21:19 > 0:21:21Don't think we can do it any more.
0:21:21 > 0:21:23W-W-What? Why?
0:21:23 > 0:21:27We got sent this. A cease-and-desist order from Max's lawyers.
0:21:27 > 0:21:30If we keep on using Max's name, they're going to take action!
0:21:32 > 0:21:34Well, what's the worst they can do?
0:21:37 > 0:21:41Ban us from going to a Max gig. Ban us from going to any gig.
0:21:41 > 0:21:44Take all our worldly goods away. Take all our friends' worldly goods.
0:21:44 > 0:21:47Take all our parents' worldly goods and forbid us
0:21:47 > 0:21:52from using words containing the letters M, A and X.
0:21:52 > 0:21:57- Wow! That would make me Egboyd! - And me Isy!
0:21:57 > 0:22:02- Megaboyd doesn't back down from anything!- But what about this?
0:22:02 > 0:22:04Let's make it secret.
0:22:04 > 0:22:07It could be the world's first underground museum.
0:22:14 > 0:22:16Aw, typical!
0:22:20 > 0:22:23- PHONE RINGS - Hello?
0:22:23 > 0:22:26Hey, Dani! My reporter friend can't make it tomorrow.
0:22:26 > 0:22:29- Can he interview you now? - What? No, no, no, hang on...
0:22:29 > 0:22:31Great! See you in a minute!
0:22:35 > 0:22:39- Where's the wheelchair? - Dani, is that you?
0:22:44 > 0:22:47Ohh! Hi, I'm Dani's friend Pam. Dani's busy, but I can help.
0:22:47 > 0:22:50- Hi, Dani!- OK, I am Dani, but I'm another Dani.
0:22:50 > 0:22:53Oh, better get in your fake wheelchair.
0:22:53 > 0:22:56What if Jack or Ruby come in?
0:22:58 > 0:23:02This is really embarrassing. The thing is, I'm not in a wheelchair.
0:23:02 > 0:23:05I was doing some research for an acting role
0:23:05 > 0:23:08- and got a bit carried away. I'm a total fake.- Got it. Say cheese.
0:23:11 > 0:23:16- Hello, Dani.- Ruby? Jack! You two set me up!
0:23:16 > 0:23:18Guess this makes us quits then, you big faker!
0:23:18 > 0:23:21Sorry. I was going to tell you...
0:23:21 > 0:23:24When? After we'd worked our fingers to the bone serving you?
0:23:24 > 0:23:26Look, I'm the first one to hold my hands up
0:23:26 > 0:23:29and admit that... this was all Fern's idea!
0:23:29 > 0:23:32- DOORBELL RINGS - I'll get it.
0:23:33 > 0:23:35I just got a bit carried away.
0:23:36 > 0:23:38Hey, Jack.
0:23:38 > 0:23:44Ahhh. Hello, "Fern", if that is your real name! Very good. Hoo-hoo!
0:23:44 > 0:23:45You and Dani almost had us fooled.
0:23:45 > 0:23:48Oh, you found out about our little scam, then?
0:23:48 > 0:23:50Yep, so, you can get up now.
0:23:50 > 0:23:52Excuse me?
0:23:52 > 0:23:56- Come on. Fun's over.- Erm...- Ahh, so you want to do this the hard way?
0:23:58 > 0:24:02No, wait. Jack, what are you doing? Stop it!
0:24:02 > 0:24:06Fern's so convincing. Is she an actress on McHurties or something?
0:24:06 > 0:24:09- No, she wants to be a presenter. - Oh, like one of those pranking shows.
0:24:09 > 0:24:11I completely believed she was disabled.
0:24:11 > 0:24:14What d'you mean? She is disabled.
0:24:14 > 0:24:16Oh! Right. Hope Jack knows.
0:24:22 > 0:24:24- Jack! Fern's not pretending!- I know!
0:24:24 > 0:24:29- She really will make me eat this mop!- What are you like?!
0:24:29 > 0:24:31You're lucky I'm a softie.
0:24:31 > 0:24:35Oh, I see you lasted a day, then!
0:24:35 > 0:24:38- I hope you learned something.- Yeah, definitely. And I've had an idea.
0:24:38 > 0:24:42We're going to go and have a chat with my producer.
0:24:47 > 0:24:52- Welcome to the Museum of Max. - Why are you whispering?- Shhhh!
0:24:52 > 0:24:56We decided to keep our museum very exclusive.
0:24:56 > 0:24:59- Why are we in this mouldy cellar?- For security.
0:24:59 > 0:25:04- These exhibits are priceless.- This here is actually Max's old laptop.
0:25:04 > 0:25:10- Ohhhh!- Ah-ha!- A-a-a-agh! - Max! We're not worthy!
0:25:10 > 0:25:14Get up, you geek! Stop them!
0:25:14 > 0:25:16Touch Max and I jam you!
0:25:16 > 0:25:20This is an unauthorised rogue museum, and I'm shutting it down.
0:25:20 > 0:25:22Sorry, Max, I didn't know.
0:25:22 > 0:25:25You two are banned from the Max Fan Club forever.
0:25:25 > 0:25:30- Well, boo hoo(!) - So long, peasants! Max out!
0:25:30 > 0:25:33- Ours I think!- Now the museum's shut, what about selling Max's stuff to me?
0:25:33 > 0:25:36- Never! Max entrusted me with this stuff.- I'll give you 1,000 quid.
0:25:36 > 0:25:41- What?!- OK, 2,000. But that's my final offer.
0:25:41 > 0:25:43We'll bag it for you, sir.
0:25:43 > 0:25:45You said you hadn't found a new TV chef.
0:25:45 > 0:25:49No. But her...she makes the tea.
0:25:49 > 0:25:51And you'd never have to drink it again.
0:25:51 > 0:25:55Mmm...that's tempting. Well, what have I got to lose?
0:25:57 > 0:26:01Just being in the chair won't cut it. She has to be fab!
0:26:01 > 0:26:03OK, I've got some good news and some bad news.
0:26:03 > 0:26:06- I've just got you a trial as a presenter.- Brilliant!
0:26:06 > 0:26:08What was the bad news?
0:26:11 > 0:26:14Hello, and welcome to Meals On Wheels.
0:26:14 > 0:26:19And believe me when I say we're going to be learning together.
0:26:19 > 0:26:24OK, let's get started. Has anybody seen one of these before?
0:26:24 > 0:26:26So how's it going for Fern?
0:26:26 > 0:26:28It's been amazing. People have been ringing in all week.
0:26:28 > 0:26:32- To say they like her?- To give her cooking tips. They love it!
0:26:32 > 0:26:35There's a TV chef that knows even less about cooking than they do.
0:26:35 > 0:26:36Only Fern could pull that off.
0:26:36 > 0:26:39- Ooh!- Where is it?
0:26:39 > 0:26:43Dani, Dani, there were some bags by the door with Max's stuff in.
0:26:43 > 0:26:46- They're super, mega important. - Oh, that junk?
0:26:46 > 0:26:49Someone from the charity shop came round asking for jumble
0:26:49 > 0:26:50- so I gave it to them.- What?!
0:26:50 > 0:26:55- DOORBELL RINGS - Please, no, say you didn't.
0:26:55 > 0:26:58The president of the fan club was going to give us two grand for that!
0:26:58 > 0:27:01Ah-ha, there you are! It's amazing what you can find in charity shops.
0:27:01 > 0:27:05I got all this lot for 49p.
0:27:05 > 0:27:08BOTH: No-o-o-o-o-o!
0:27:10 > 0:27:14- Another ingenious episode! - Shall we get on with this, then?
0:27:14 > 0:27:20OK. Brilliant idea, sending a photo in to prove we've gotten in shape.
0:27:20 > 0:27:24Mwah! Mwah! I love my guns!
0:27:26 > 0:27:30Come on! Hurry up! The timer's running. Quick!
0:27:35 > 0:27:38Oh, come on! Please!
0:27:38 > 0:27:41AIR HISSES
0:27:42 > 0:27:45BOTH: Oh, no. A-a-a-agh!
0:27:48 > 0:27:53# Sometimes I feel like breaking free
0:27:53 > 0:27:57# Let's lift these chains Let's rock these waves
0:27:57 > 0:28:00# Right out to sea
0:28:00 > 0:28:05# I will be breaking free. #