0:00:03 > 0:00:05My name's Steve Backshall. Ooh!
0:00:05 > 0:00:10And this is my search for the Deadly 60.
0:00:10 > 0:00:13I'm sorry, Steve, didn't anyone tell you? This is Deadly Bloopers.
0:00:18 > 0:00:22For many years now, Steve has been travelling the world, filming
0:00:22 > 0:00:25wildlife. But things haven't always gone to plan, have they?
0:00:25 > 0:00:27It's packed with muscle.
0:00:30 > 0:00:34What made me think this would be a good idea?
0:00:35 > 0:00:40From nosey animals to ropey river crossings, to swim shorts
0:00:40 > 0:00:41not done up tightly enough.
0:00:41 > 0:00:45These are the clips Steve may wish you hadn't seen.
0:00:45 > 0:00:47That wasn't me. I didn't do that. Nobody saw it..
0:00:47 > 0:00:49Yes, we did!
0:00:49 > 0:00:54First up... Oh, dear ..slips and slides.
0:00:57 > 0:01:00Wildlife presenting - how difficult can it be? It's just walking
0:01:00 > 0:01:02and talking.
0:01:02 > 0:01:04An animal coming down to the water to drink
0:01:04 > 0:01:06may already be as good as dead.
0:01:06 > 0:01:10It probably won't know about it till the second it gets attacked.
0:01:10 > 0:01:13Even a huge croc can hide...
0:01:13 > 0:01:17Yes, don't worry. Even a huge croc can't eat you when it's laughing.
0:01:17 > 0:01:19I'm so glad we did that(!)
0:01:19 > 0:01:22That was ALWAYS going to happen.
0:01:22 > 0:01:24That was SO going to happen.
0:01:24 > 0:01:26Never mind.
0:01:26 > 0:01:30Putting up a hammock is simple for a jungle master like Steve.
0:01:30 > 0:01:32Whoops, have another go.
0:01:36 > 0:01:38Third time lucky?
0:01:41 > 0:01:44Best stick to the inflatable bed, Steve.
0:01:49 > 0:01:50How about that one?
0:01:50 > 0:01:55So, hammocks are a "no" but getting off a horse that's as easy as...
0:01:55 > 0:01:56getting off a horse.
0:01:56 > 0:02:00So this branch has had the bark stripped right off it.
0:02:00 > 0:02:02They're feeding on that,
0:02:02 > 0:02:06just stripping it back, eating just this and discarding the rest.
0:02:07 > 0:02:09Very close now.
0:02:11 > 0:02:13Timber!
0:02:14 > 0:02:16That wasn't me. I didn't do that.
0:02:16 > 0:02:19That's the second time you've said that.
0:02:19 > 0:02:20OK, Steve, watch out for that...
0:02:20 > 0:02:21BANG
0:02:21 > 0:02:24Argh, who put that wall there?
0:02:24 > 0:02:27- Oh, and watch out for the... - Argh!
0:02:27 > 0:02:28..ground.
0:02:30 > 0:02:31Argh!
0:02:31 > 0:02:36That's what you call a crash-landing.
0:02:36 > 0:02:37Ah, good shot, Steve...
0:02:37 > 0:02:41Oh, maybe not...that's why they make you wear a helmet.
0:02:41 > 0:02:44That's a bad start!
0:02:44 > 0:02:47Oh, come on, Steve, it's only a little one..
0:02:47 > 0:02:51Cut! I've been wanting to film this for the best part of a decade.
0:02:51 > 0:02:53It's called the giant scolopendra.
0:02:53 > 0:02:55It's the largest species of centipede
0:02:55 > 0:02:59found on Earth and I've got myself trapped in a tree.
0:02:59 > 0:03:03You could have got away with that, Steve, told us it was camouflage.
0:03:03 > 0:03:05Anyway, back at the river.
0:03:05 > 0:03:08Let's try that whole walking and talking thing again.
0:03:08 > 0:03:11The key thing is to find a firm place to stand on.
0:03:12 > 0:03:15Yeah, like not there.
0:03:15 > 0:03:18Still, never mind, that's probably just a one-off...
0:03:18 > 0:03:20Give it another go.
0:03:20 > 0:03:23Right, let's just go... It's beautiful, Steve.
0:03:23 > 0:03:27Hmm. Yep, I don't want to interfere, Steve
0:03:27 > 0:03:32but maybe you should think about finding somewhere else...
0:03:32 > 0:03:33That's the same rock.
0:03:34 > 0:03:37Well, if you won't listen to my advice...
0:03:42 > 0:03:45Are you sure you don't want to try somewhere else?
0:03:45 > 0:03:47I bet the soundman agrees with me.
0:03:47 > 0:03:50"Yes, it's true, I do. But he won't listen to you."
0:03:52 > 0:03:54HE LAUGHS
0:03:54 > 0:03:56Don't worry, Steve.
0:03:56 > 0:04:00This footage where you look stupid won't be wasted.
0:04:00 > 0:04:03We're going to use it for this programme.
0:04:07 > 0:04:10Let's move onto something a little more daring.
0:04:10 > 0:04:12We're about 20 metres above the water,
0:04:12 > 0:04:15which is about average for a gannet's dive.
0:04:15 > 0:04:17Looks quite high
0:04:17 > 0:04:20and if I hit the water wrong from this height,
0:04:20 > 0:04:22it's going to really, really hurt.
0:04:22 > 0:04:24Better get it right.
0:04:24 > 0:04:28So do we, Steve...but sometimes hope isn't quite enough.
0:04:33 > 0:04:35Ow!
0:04:35 > 0:04:37I might do another one of those.
0:04:37 > 0:04:39Really? Are you sure?
0:04:39 > 0:04:42It might be less painful just to see that same dive again.
0:04:48 > 0:04:50Although not to your ego.
0:04:50 > 0:04:52Ow!
0:04:52 > 0:04:55Come on, Steve - time to show us your sledding skills.
0:04:55 > 0:04:56DOGS BARK
0:04:56 > 0:05:00Well, they seem to be OK when you're not moving.
0:05:00 > 0:05:03OK, we're good, we're going, we're going.
0:05:05 > 0:05:08Ah, yes, this is good. Very good.
0:05:11 > 0:05:13Very bad. That was bad.
0:05:14 > 0:05:17That falling over you just saw there...
0:05:17 > 0:05:19Oh!
0:05:19 > 0:05:21..was a whole training procedure for the dogs.
0:05:21 > 0:05:23It was just for them.
0:05:23 > 0:05:26It wasn't because I messed up, at all.
0:05:26 > 0:05:29No, we believe you(!) How are the mighty fallen!
0:05:32 > 0:05:38Of course, if you are a top presenter, you NEVER make mistakes.
0:05:38 > 0:05:40What could possibly go wrong?
0:05:40 > 0:05:43This is going to happen absolutely perfectly first time round.
0:05:43 > 0:05:44You want to bet?
0:05:44 > 0:05:47This time on Deadly 60, we're in the Philippines.
0:05:47 > 0:05:49HE LAUGHS
0:05:50 > 0:05:53This time on Deadly 60, we're in the Philippines.
0:05:53 > 0:05:55HE LAUGHS
0:05:56 > 0:05:58This time on Deadly 60...
0:05:58 > 0:06:00Oh!
0:06:03 > 0:06:05Am I supposed to be looking cool doing this?
0:06:05 > 0:06:07Yes, and you are doing a really good job(!)
0:06:07 > 0:06:11- We'll try that again, shall we? - It's probably best.
0:06:11 > 0:06:13Ooh, ooh!
0:06:13 > 0:06:16It really is the most extraordinary-looking creature.
0:06:16 > 0:06:18You start from the top...
0:06:18 > 0:06:19That's the bottom, actually!
0:06:19 > 0:06:21HE LAUGHS
0:06:21 > 0:06:24Vela...vela...velodromes?
0:06:24 > 0:06:26What was the word I was looking for?
0:06:26 > 0:06:27Hmm, vocabulary(?)
0:06:27 > 0:06:30Later on, when it starts to get snowy here
0:06:30 > 0:06:33and there's no food at all, these birds'll... Birds?!
0:06:33 > 0:06:35Pretty sure they're not birds.
0:06:35 > 0:06:37No... Fairly certain that is a bear.
0:06:37 > 0:06:40And their acceleration is faster than any...
0:06:40 > 0:06:42FARTING NOISE
0:06:42 > 0:06:45Have you ever found anacondas snorkelling before?
0:06:45 > 0:06:47Sorry, what did you say, Steve?
0:06:47 > 0:06:50Have you ever found anacondas snorkelling before?
0:06:50 > 0:06:52- That's what I thought you said.- D'oh!
0:06:52 > 0:06:53THEY LAUGH
0:06:53 > 0:06:57One of the biggest, one of the... Dah!
0:06:57 > 0:07:02Mouse limas like Madame...
0:07:02 > 0:07:04I can't believe I forgot the name of the animal...
0:07:04 > 0:07:06Well, he didn't recognise a bear!
0:07:06 > 0:07:09This is the high savannah of Namibia.
0:07:09 > 0:07:12As far as the eye can see, it's dry, rugged wilderness,
0:07:12 > 0:07:16and out there are all of Africa's bad boys. All of them!
0:07:16 > 0:07:17Don't know what I'm talking about now!
0:07:17 > 0:07:20All of Africa's bad boys are out there.
0:07:20 > 0:07:22Bad boys of African wildlife.
0:07:22 > 0:07:23All of Africa's bad boys.
0:07:23 > 0:07:25Oh!
0:07:25 > 0:07:27This is the high savannah of Namibia.
0:07:27 > 0:07:28Ni-bi-bi-bibia.
0:07:28 > 0:07:31As far as the eye can see, in every direction,
0:07:31 > 0:07:35is endless miles of...endlessness.
0:07:35 > 0:07:38This is going to go on forever!
0:07:38 > 0:07:41- I do hope not. I'm going out tonight. - This is the one right here.
0:07:41 > 0:07:43Please. I've not been out for weeks!
0:07:43 > 0:07:45This is the high savannah of Namibi...
0:07:45 > 0:07:47HE LAUGHS
0:07:47 > 0:07:50- I'm not laughing.- This is the BAFTA award-winning presenter,
0:07:50 > 0:07:51Steve Backshall.
0:07:51 > 0:07:52Good.
0:07:52 > 0:07:56Now Steve's mastered that, it's time for a far easier job(!)
0:07:56 > 0:07:58He's going to deliver a piece to camera
0:07:58 > 0:08:00while being dragged behind a boat.
0:08:03 > 0:08:07You can see, as we start to build up speed,
0:08:07 > 0:08:11automatically the water's pushing back against me,
0:08:11 > 0:08:15and I'm really struggling to hold on.
0:08:15 > 0:08:19I'm actually already losing my trunks!
0:08:19 > 0:08:21Faster, make it go faster.
0:08:21 > 0:08:23I don't think I tied them on quite strong enough.
0:08:23 > 0:08:26Ah! Oh, dear!
0:08:26 > 0:08:28- How fast now?- 6.8.
0:08:28 > 0:08:30OK.
0:08:30 > 0:08:31MAN SHOUTS
0:08:31 > 0:08:33Ten miles-an-hour!
0:08:33 > 0:08:35Argh!
0:08:35 > 0:08:37Look at Steve's trunks!
0:08:37 > 0:08:41I hope you can't see my bottom!
0:08:41 > 0:08:44We wouldn't look anyway, Steve. We're taking this very seriously(!)
0:08:44 > 0:08:45He's gone.
0:08:45 > 0:08:47And so have his pants.
0:08:47 > 0:08:49Anyway, back to Namibia.
0:08:49 > 0:08:50Come on, Steve.
0:08:50 > 0:08:53This is the high savannah of Namibia.
0:08:53 > 0:08:55As far as the eye can see, in every direction,
0:08:55 > 0:08:59are endless miles of rugged wilderness, stuffed full of animals.
0:08:59 > 0:09:02And all of the bad boys of African wildlife.
0:09:02 > 0:09:05And why couldn't you have done that the first time?
0:09:10 > 0:09:15Sometimes, let's be honest, wildlife filming isn't that exciting.
0:09:15 > 0:09:18Like when you're watching a giant tortoise that's gone camera shy.
0:09:18 > 0:09:21SNORING
0:09:21 > 0:09:24I'm not even sure that's an animal at all.
0:09:24 > 0:09:26I think it might be a giant Cornish pasty.
0:09:29 > 0:09:32It's more exciting when things are slippery.
0:09:32 > 0:09:36So it's far from the monster we were hoping for
0:09:36 > 0:09:39but it's still a pretty impressive fish.
0:09:39 > 0:09:42This is...ooh, crikey!
0:09:44 > 0:09:47It shouldn't actually do the wolffish much harm being
0:09:47 > 0:09:49out of the water for a short period of time.
0:09:49 > 0:09:54These are... It's a cylindrical fish that's packed with muscle.
0:09:54 > 0:09:56HE LAUGHS
0:09:56 > 0:09:59Right, well, let's see that again.
0:09:59 > 0:10:01You say it's a wolffish, Steve?
0:10:01 > 0:10:03Are you sure it isn't a flying one?
0:10:03 > 0:10:08What made me think this would be a good idea?
0:10:08 > 0:10:12Don't get the wrong idea - that is the only thing
0:10:12 > 0:10:14that's ever slipped through Steve's fingers(!)
0:10:14 > 0:10:16HE LAUGHS
0:10:16 > 0:10:20From winged wonder to masked alien assassin.
0:10:20 > 0:10:21Whoops.
0:10:21 > 0:10:25It's like some kind of deadly alien boxer.
0:10:26 > 0:10:28So impressive!
0:10:28 > 0:10:30As long as I keep the snake moving
0:10:30 > 0:10:32and there's a possibility it's still alive,
0:10:32 > 0:10:33he'll keep stamping.
0:10:33 > 0:10:37But the second I stop... he'll just keep on stamping.
0:10:37 > 0:10:40You should have put your foot down, Steve.
0:10:40 > 0:10:44Anyway, a nice bit of relaxation in the pool.
0:10:52 > 0:10:54Tell you what, Steve,
0:10:54 > 0:10:56that Jacuzzi needs a bit of a service.
0:10:56 > 0:10:58That way. That way!
0:10:58 > 0:11:01Go on, go that way! Ah!
0:11:01 > 0:11:02Yeah.
0:11:03 > 0:11:06I just think I'll sit over here for a sec.
0:11:06 > 0:11:11So, the climbing, clambering, colour-morphing chameleon
0:11:11 > 0:11:13in all his many forms.
0:11:13 > 0:11:15With his lightning-fast tongue...
0:11:17 > 0:11:18..and lousy shot.
0:11:18 > 0:11:21Just like an England centre-forward.
0:11:21 > 0:11:24Anyway, back at the tortoise.
0:11:25 > 0:11:27Ah, it's all action(!)
0:11:27 > 0:11:31That tortoise needs to loosen up a bit, come out of its shell.
0:11:33 > 0:11:35SNORING
0:11:35 > 0:11:39Ah, here Steve is trying to test his running against one
0:11:39 > 0:11:44of the fastest animals on Earth, the cheetah. The problem is...
0:11:44 > 0:11:46no-one's told the cheetah.
0:11:49 > 0:11:52Hm, maybe the cheetah is trying to tire Steve out a bit
0:11:52 > 0:11:55because he's worried that Steve might win.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57No. I don't think so, either.
0:12:01 > 0:12:04Of all the genuinely silly things I've done on this programme,
0:12:04 > 0:12:06I think this has to be the worst.
0:12:06 > 0:12:08Sorry, Steve, could you say that again?
0:12:08 > 0:12:11Of all the genuinely silly things I've done on this programme,
0:12:11 > 0:12:12I think this has to be the worst.
0:12:12 > 0:12:15The thing is, I'm not sure that's true.
0:12:15 > 0:12:17Do you not remember this?
0:12:23 > 0:12:25Argh!
0:12:25 > 0:12:26Or this?
0:12:26 > 0:12:29Argh! Ooh!
0:12:31 > 0:12:33How about when you did that?
0:12:33 > 0:12:36HE MAKES ANIMAL NOISES
0:12:36 > 0:12:39HE BARKS
0:12:39 > 0:12:41HE MAKES BIRD CALL
0:12:41 > 0:12:43Or this?
0:12:43 > 0:12:45Argh!
0:12:45 > 0:12:46Argh!
0:12:48 > 0:12:51No, Steve, there's a whole host of silly things you seem
0:12:51 > 0:12:53to have forgotten about.
0:12:53 > 0:12:55MUSIC: "Misirlou" by Dick Dale
0:12:56 > 0:12:57Argh!
0:12:57 > 0:12:59HE LAUGHS
0:12:59 > 0:13:01Argh!
0:13:08 > 0:13:10Actually...
0:13:10 > 0:13:12None of us could forget this.
0:13:12 > 0:13:14Argh!
0:13:22 > 0:13:26All that was just to get a plastic fish.
0:13:26 > 0:13:30No. Racing a cheetah is, well...relatively normal.
0:13:33 > 0:13:34You know, Steve, maybe
0:13:34 > 0:13:38if you showed the animals a little more love, they might play ball.
0:13:42 > 0:13:44Oh, that's better.
0:13:52 > 0:13:55Oh, he's just too adorable for words!
0:13:57 > 0:13:59Ah, I want one!
0:13:59 > 0:14:00Did it hurt?
0:14:00 > 0:14:03You don't want them getting too attached, though.
0:14:03 > 0:14:06I've got two on my nipple!
0:14:06 > 0:14:08Is that really necessary?
0:14:08 > 0:14:12Come on, fella, let's go! Come on!
0:14:13 > 0:14:16Yeah, yeah, he likes you!
0:14:16 > 0:14:18Hey!
0:14:18 > 0:14:19Hey, fella.
0:14:24 > 0:14:26- Ah!- Oh!
0:14:26 > 0:14:27It's more than a love bite.
0:14:27 > 0:14:30But he won't puncture the skin, I don't think.
0:14:30 > 0:14:32That's encouraging(!)
0:14:32 > 0:14:34This way, Steve, run!
0:14:34 > 0:14:39Leaf-tailed geckos have a limited ability to change their skin colour.
0:14:39 > 0:14:42And d'you know, Steve, the more you love them...
0:14:42 > 0:14:43Not as fast
0:14:43 > 0:14:47or as dramatic as chameleons but if they have a favoured tree.
0:14:47 > 0:14:48..the more they will love you.
0:14:48 > 0:14:51..they can make themselves match it even more.
0:14:51 > 0:14:53Mostly. You never know.
0:14:53 > 0:14:56Come on, go and find yourself a...
0:14:56 > 0:14:58- girlfriend. - HE LAUGHS
0:15:02 > 0:15:03Argh!
0:15:03 > 0:15:05HE LAUGHS
0:15:05 > 0:15:08Don't get too cocky, though, Steve.
0:15:08 > 0:15:10Those animals have another love interest.
0:15:16 > 0:15:19It's quite hard to get it back.
0:15:19 > 0:15:20Definitely made friends.
0:15:23 > 0:15:26Ah... finally, true love.
0:15:31 > 0:15:34While in Mexico looking for some bat-eating snakes,
0:15:34 > 0:15:36Steve's language skills are put to the test.
0:15:36 > 0:15:39What's the name of this place in Mexican?
0:15:39 > 0:15:42La Cueva de las Serpientes Colgantes.
0:15:42 > 0:15:43Oh, dear.
0:15:43 > 0:15:46Fortunately he is a master of, er, the foreign lingo(!)
0:15:46 > 0:15:49La Cueva...
0:15:49 > 0:15:51de las Serpientes...
0:15:51 > 0:15:53"de Colganes."
0:15:53 > 0:15:54Colgantes.
0:15:54 > 0:15:57Colgantes. Colgantes.
0:15:57 > 0:16:00The locals call this cave...
0:16:00 > 0:16:01HE LAUGHS
0:16:01 > 0:16:04Shall we try just one more time, Steve? Listen carefully.
0:16:04 > 0:16:06- La Cueva.- La Cueva.
0:16:06 > 0:16:08- De.- De.
0:16:08 > 0:16:09- Las.- Las.
0:16:09 > 0:16:11- Serpientes.- Serpientes.
0:16:11 > 0:16:14- Colgantes.- Colgantes. OK.
0:16:14 > 0:16:15Local people call...
0:16:15 > 0:16:17HE LAUGHS
0:16:22 > 0:16:24OK. Right, this is the one.
0:16:24 > 0:16:26The locals call this cave La Cueva
0:16:26 > 0:16:28de las Serpientes "de Colganes".
0:16:28 > 0:16:31Or something like that. My Spanish isn't very good!
0:16:31 > 0:16:33HE LAUGHS
0:16:33 > 0:16:36Maybe your Spanish will be better on a boat.
0:16:36 > 0:16:38MAN SPEAKS SPANISH
0:16:42 > 0:16:44I don't have the heart to tell him
0:16:44 > 0:16:46I don't understand what he's saying.
0:16:46 > 0:16:49Or the Spanish to tell him I don't know what he's saying.
0:16:49 > 0:16:50Any ideas?
0:16:50 > 0:16:52Well, how about learning Spanish?
0:16:52 > 0:16:54OK, let's try Portuguese.
0:16:55 > 0:17:00He says, "Exactly 15 minutes, they'll be here."
0:17:00 > 0:17:02HE LAUGHS
0:17:02 > 0:17:04They're pretty precise here.
0:17:04 > 0:17:07Are you sure? How many fingers was he holding up?
0:17:09 > 0:17:10Ten.
0:17:11 > 0:17:15Ten minutes, Steve, it's ten!
0:17:15 > 0:17:20He says, "Exactly 15 minutes, they'll be here."
0:17:20 > 0:17:24Well, with language skills like that, it's never going to be
0:17:24 > 0:17:26difficult to get your point across(!)
0:17:26 > 0:17:28So, you have...
0:17:28 > 0:17:30- Kssh, ssh-shh?- Yes.
0:17:30 > 0:17:32- Can I see?- Yes.
0:17:32 > 0:17:34- Where is?- Yes.
0:17:34 > 0:17:36- You have...- Yes. Yes.
0:17:36 > 0:17:38- Can I see?- Yes.
0:17:38 > 0:17:40- Where is?- Yes.
0:17:40 > 0:17:42Kssh, ssh-shh?
0:17:47 > 0:17:49Hm, this could take a while.
0:17:54 > 0:17:57Do you agree? "Yes, yes."
0:17:57 > 0:18:00Fortunately, everyone else on the show
0:18:00 > 0:18:02is a true professional.
0:18:02 > 0:18:04Everyone here's really struggling
0:18:04 > 0:18:06to make sure we can film all this
0:18:06 > 0:18:08and we are out looking for
0:18:08 > 0:18:10one of the most dangerous predators in the world.
0:18:10 > 0:18:14So it's really important we take things really, really seriously.
0:18:14 > 0:18:18Yes, I see what you mean, absolutely(!)
0:18:18 > 0:18:21MUSIC: "Do Your Thing" by Basement Jaxx
0:18:33 > 0:18:35HE SNORES
0:18:35 > 0:18:37HE MOUTHS
0:18:41 > 0:18:44The hippos in the wild are a totally different animal.
0:18:44 > 0:18:46To get close to them...
0:18:48 > 0:18:49HE LAUGHS
0:18:52 > 0:18:54- Steve, wait up!- Steve, hold on!
0:18:56 > 0:18:58Enough to pay them some respect, that's for sure.
0:18:58 > 0:19:01And maybe they're a bit frightened of them.
0:19:01 > 0:19:02But our next step...
0:19:02 > 0:19:05Ha-ha-ha! Please tell me you were rolling!
0:19:05 > 0:19:07PLEASE tell me you were rolling!
0:19:07 > 0:19:10One of the most important things with wildlife watching
0:19:10 > 0:19:13is to keep low, reduce your profile.
0:19:13 > 0:19:16Never to stand on a ridge line creating a silhouette that's
0:19:16 > 0:19:18really, really obvious for animals.
0:19:18 > 0:19:20Oh, I think I know what's coming.
0:19:20 > 0:19:21I'm sure they won't wave, though.
0:19:21 > 0:19:23Hiya!
0:19:23 > 0:19:24True professionals.
0:19:27 > 0:19:29Whale!
0:19:30 > 0:19:31You...
0:19:32 > 0:19:34We're now about...
0:19:34 > 0:19:36TEXT MESSAGE NOTIFICATION
0:19:38 > 0:19:40Sorry! I'm sorry.
0:19:41 > 0:19:43When we're ready, then, chaps.
0:19:47 > 0:19:50Hm, travelling light, Steve?
0:19:50 > 0:19:51Ah, I see.
0:19:53 > 0:19:56He's so lazy. He could have helped.
0:19:56 > 0:19:59But don't worry, they'll often find a way to get their own back.
0:19:59 > 0:20:02Like here, Steve is doing a Deadly experiment.
0:20:02 > 0:20:03It's a senses test
0:20:03 > 0:20:07and he needs to find a cup of coffee using just smell.
0:20:08 > 0:20:12The crew, well, they wouldn't let anything...happen to him.
0:20:18 > 0:20:22What's good is that there's so much respect in my team.
0:20:31 > 0:20:35Yeah, his mistake was leaving an obvious silhouette.
0:20:42 > 0:20:45Now, one thing is always going to happen when you work with wildlife -
0:20:45 > 0:20:49they just love to poo and wee on you, and Steve...
0:20:49 > 0:20:51Well, he loves it happening.
0:20:51 > 0:20:53Oh, you...
0:20:53 > 0:20:56- SLOW:- Oh, you...
0:20:56 > 0:20:59- HE LAUGHS - Phantom wee-er of the Philippines.
0:21:03 > 0:21:07Over the years, the absolute bane of my life has been people complaining
0:21:07 > 0:21:10about peregrines pooing on the ground while they're talking.
0:21:10 > 0:21:12Thank you.
0:21:12 > 0:21:16Come on, is he going to investigate? He's just sniffing around...
0:21:16 > 0:21:19Oh, and he's having a wee on the camera. That's not good.
0:21:25 > 0:21:27- Oh, no.- This is what we expect in the forest.
0:21:27 > 0:21:31- Was that fig or was that poo? - No, it's fig.- No, it wasn't.
0:21:31 > 0:21:34I'm sorry, Ronald, but that is not fig.
0:21:34 > 0:21:37That is chimp poo and that just clouted me right in the face.
0:21:37 > 0:21:40Oh, come on, Steve. It probably had fig in it.
0:21:41 > 0:21:44I've just had a bird poo on my head,
0:21:44 > 0:21:48and in some parts of the world, it's considered good luck.
0:21:48 > 0:21:52Unfortunately, round here it just means you smell bad.
0:21:52 > 0:21:56I don't know if you can see this, but as she's moving...
0:21:56 > 0:21:59can you see that, Johnny? Oh, look - she just pooed on my hand.
0:22:04 > 0:22:09I just knelt in a really fresh piece of rhino poo. Yuck.
0:22:11 > 0:22:13That is just craziness.
0:22:13 > 0:22:15Oh!
0:22:15 > 0:22:18I can't believe he just sat there.
0:22:18 > 0:22:20That's the magic of the river at night.
0:22:22 > 0:22:25And he also just pooed all down my front.
0:22:25 > 0:22:28Yeah, well, I think that's worth seeing again.
0:22:32 > 0:22:34That is just...
0:22:35 > 0:22:38Ah, that's not a lousy shot.
0:22:38 > 0:22:40Right, moving swiftly on.
0:22:42 > 0:22:45When the crew headed to the jungles of Uganda
0:22:45 > 0:22:48there was one animal they were hoping to find.
0:22:48 > 0:22:53The mountain gorilla - a powerhouse of the natural world.
0:22:53 > 0:22:56I can see the bushes moving just ahead of us.
0:22:56 > 0:22:59I'm kind of shaking, half with excitement
0:22:59 > 0:23:01and half with a little bit of trepidation.
0:23:01 > 0:23:06But with a gorilla, you may well hear them before you see them.
0:23:06 > 0:23:08GORILLA FARTS
0:23:08 > 0:23:10Oh, did you hear that?
0:23:10 > 0:23:15GORILLA FARTS
0:23:17 > 0:23:19Honestly, Nick...
0:23:21 > 0:23:27GORILLA FARTS
0:23:32 > 0:23:34Oh, that would melt plastic.
0:23:35 > 0:23:37Careful though, Steve -
0:23:37 > 0:23:40this male doesn't appreciate you laughing at his ladies.
0:23:45 > 0:23:48Well, if you thought that smell packed a punch...
0:23:51 > 0:23:52(Wow.)
0:23:58 > 0:24:01Yeah, that was quite a left hook.
0:24:01 > 0:24:03I'm glad it didn't go a couple of inches to the right.
0:24:03 > 0:24:07Useful lesson, kids. Never, ever laugh at a gorilla.
0:24:07 > 0:24:11But it's not just wee and poo Steve has to deal with.
0:24:11 > 0:24:15We all know that dogs bark, birds tweet and whales sing,
0:24:15 > 0:24:18but apart from their rather repulsive spitting,
0:24:18 > 0:24:21alpacas have a rather interesting way of communicating.
0:24:21 > 0:24:23So how do they talk to each other?
0:24:23 > 0:24:26Mm. He didn't like the tone of your question, Steve.
0:24:26 > 0:24:29Oh... Has anyone got a hanky?
0:24:29 > 0:24:32Oh...
0:24:32 > 0:24:34Nice.
0:24:36 > 0:24:38This one is apparently called Spitty.
0:24:38 > 0:24:42Well, if you give an animal a name to live up to...
0:24:42 > 0:24:45- Argh! - HE LAUGHS
0:24:45 > 0:24:47Oh!
0:24:49 > 0:24:53Now, listen, fellas - hum along when you know the tune.
0:24:53 > 0:24:55HE HUMS
0:24:55 > 0:24:58HE LAUGHS
0:24:58 > 0:25:02But really when it comes down to it, Steve just loves a bit of poo.
0:25:02 > 0:25:04Don't you?
0:25:04 > 0:25:07Well, there is only one animal that that can come from.
0:25:08 > 0:25:12That is a big fat bear scat.
0:25:14 > 0:25:19I can almost smell it now. Oh, look how fresh that is. Oh, yes.
0:25:19 > 0:25:21Almost like a kind of slightly off pie.
0:25:21 > 0:25:25I tell you what, Steve, I am never, ever eating at your house.
0:25:25 > 0:25:27Yes.
0:25:28 > 0:25:30Now, that is a big pile of poo,
0:25:30 > 0:25:33and this here is still relatively fresh, actually.
0:25:33 > 0:25:36And that's moose droppings there. That's not so fresh.
0:25:36 > 0:25:39It's full of grass. It's more what you'd expect from an antelope.
0:25:39 > 0:25:41I was going to say that.
0:25:41 > 0:25:44Still quite sticky. Ooh, very strong smelling.
0:25:44 > 0:25:45There are mountains of it.
0:25:45 > 0:25:49A dropping that size has come out of a very large bottom.
0:25:49 > 0:25:50Mm, yum yum.
0:25:54 > 0:25:57Oh, that's pretty solid, actually.
0:25:57 > 0:26:01The water below us is filled with fluorescent orange junk.
0:26:01 > 0:26:05It's actually blue whale poo. It's incredible stuff.
0:26:05 > 0:26:08Blue whale poo? That looks red to me.
0:26:08 > 0:26:12- Oh, I see. - You could almost use it as make-up.
0:26:12 > 0:26:14Yeah, I'm not sure that's really going to take off.
0:26:14 > 0:26:18Don't think I've ever been quite so excited about poo in my entire life.
0:26:25 > 0:26:31In the end, though, there's nothing better than a good old Deadly Dance.
0:26:31 > 0:26:35MUSIC: "Gangnam Style" by Psy
0:27:23 > 0:27:26Hello, and welcome to Deadly 60.
0:27:37 > 0:27:39# Night fever, night fever... #
0:27:41 > 0:27:44Look, Steve, I'm sorry if I've been a bit rude.
0:27:44 > 0:27:47Can I come next time?
0:27:54 > 0:27:57This has been Deadly Bloopers, it's goodbye from me
0:27:57 > 0:28:00and it's goodbye from Steve.
0:28:00 > 0:28:02# Da-na-da-da-da! #
0:28:02 > 0:28:05I wonder if any of them do any work at all.