0:00:02 > 0:00:05# Na-na na-na na-na Gigglebiz
0:00:05 > 0:00:07# Na-na na-na Ho-ho-ho
0:00:07 > 0:00:10# Na-na na-na na-na Gigglebiz
0:00:10 > 0:00:13# Na-na na-na Here we go! #
0:00:14 > 0:00:15Ho-ho!
0:00:15 > 0:00:18Coming up on Gigglebiz.
0:00:18 > 0:00:24Enrico Paso Doble, Nana Knickerbocker, Will Singalot.
0:00:24 > 0:00:29But first it's Professor Muddles.
0:00:29 > 0:00:33Here comes Daddy with a fishy little treat. There we are.
0:00:33 > 0:00:34MEOW! No?
0:00:34 > 0:00:37All right, I'll pop it down there for later.
0:00:37 > 0:00:41Hello, there. I'm a cuddly cat and this is Professor Muddles.
0:00:41 > 0:00:43Oh, wait, that's not right.
0:00:43 > 0:00:47I'm Professor Cuddles and this is a muddly cat. Oh, wait!
0:00:47 > 0:00:52I'm Professor Muddles and this is a cuddly cat. Ha-ha!
0:00:52 > 0:00:55Got there in the end. Come along, you.
0:00:55 > 0:01:00Now, this is Schrodinger, my lovely pet cat and he's here to help me
0:01:00 > 0:01:04answer a very important scientific question.
0:01:04 > 0:01:07How do you make your pet cat laugh?
0:01:07 > 0:01:10First, let's have a look at the list, shall we?
0:01:10 > 0:01:15Ah, yes, we have silly faces. Brace yourself, Schrodinger.
0:01:15 > 0:01:18Pure comedy gold coming at you. Ooh-ooh! Here we go.
0:01:21 > 0:01:22MEOW!
0:01:26 > 0:01:27MEOW! No?
0:01:27 > 0:01:30I'll try the big one.
0:01:30 > 0:01:31HONK! MEOW!
0:01:31 > 0:01:35Oh, Schrodinger. Oh, well, that's a big cross, isn't it? Never mind.
0:01:35 > 0:01:38Right, let's see what's next on the list.
0:01:38 > 0:01:43Ah, yes, of course, silly dancing. Oh, never fails. Right, here we go.
0:01:46 > 0:01:48MUSIC PLAYS
0:01:59 > 0:02:01TURNS MUSIC OFF
0:02:01 > 0:02:05Oh, I don't know. Not even a giggle. Quite remarkable.
0:02:05 > 0:02:12Another big cross, no. Right, let's see what's next, shall we? A-ha!
0:02:12 > 0:02:14Of course.
0:02:14 > 0:02:19Ta-da! The king of comedy, a custard pie.
0:02:19 > 0:02:23Now, simply take one custard pie and one face, yours truly,
0:02:23 > 0:02:25and combine at speed.
0:02:25 > 0:02:29Are you ready for this, Schrodinger? Here we go.
0:02:34 > 0:02:39I don't believe it. Nothing. All right, how about two custard pies?
0:02:39 > 0:02:41Are you ready? Here we go.
0:02:44 > 0:02:50Anything? No. Oh, really? Is it going to take three custard pies?
0:02:50 > 0:02:53I mean, honestly, throw me a bone here.
0:02:53 > 0:02:56Hang on a minute, where has that cat gone?
0:02:56 > 0:03:00Oh, look, he's over there asleep in his basket, would you believe it?
0:03:00 > 0:03:02So, what have we learned today?
0:03:02 > 0:03:05You might not be able to make a cat laugh
0:03:05 > 0:03:07but you can certainly make him,
0:03:07 > 0:03:08erm, snore.
0:03:08 > 0:03:12Right, time for a nice, long bath, I see. Goodbye.
0:03:12 > 0:03:14Ah-ee! SPLAT!
0:03:16 > 0:03:19Oh, dear. I think I'm going to get a dog.
0:03:19 > 0:03:20MEOW!
0:03:20 > 0:03:24FLAMENCO MUSIC PLAYS
0:03:40 > 0:03:42INAUDIBLE
0:03:55 > 0:03:57INAUDIBLE
0:04:42 > 0:04:46INAUDIBLE
0:05:03 > 0:05:06Oh, that's better. And now Keith Fitt for the sport.
0:05:08 > 0:05:11Howay, bairns? Keith Fitt here.
0:05:11 > 0:05:14Welcome to Keith Fitt It's A Record, Man!
0:05:16 > 0:05:18OK, now, I'm going to
0:05:18 > 0:05:22break the world record today for the three-legged race.
0:05:22 > 0:05:25Come on, let's go and meet the judges.
0:05:26 > 0:05:30OK, here they are. All right, man? OK.
0:05:30 > 0:05:33Now, I've only been doing three-legged races
0:05:33 > 0:05:34for over a week now
0:05:34 > 0:05:38so I'm very... What am I talking about? Always joking around.
0:05:38 > 0:05:41- Oh, champion. - So, who are you racing with, Keith?
0:05:41 > 0:05:44Er, what are you talking about, man?
0:05:44 > 0:05:47You need a partner for a three-legged race.
0:05:47 > 0:05:49Oh, aye, you're right.
0:05:49 > 0:05:51Erm, will you be my partner?
0:05:51 > 0:05:55Oh, come on, man. I want to break the record.
0:05:55 > 0:05:59- All right.- Oh, champion.
0:05:59 > 0:06:02Come on, then. OK, off we go. Up to the start line.
0:06:09 > 0:06:13Right, Keith, you have to finish this three-legged racecourse
0:06:13 > 0:06:16as fast as you can and if you break the record, I'm going
0:06:16 > 0:06:22- to give you this celebration cake. - Oh, champion. I'm ready, man.
0:06:22 > 0:06:25In three, two, one, go!
0:06:27 > 0:06:32Go on. Go on, Keith. Eyes to the prize, Keith. Come on, my son.
0:06:32 > 0:06:37- All the way. Come on, that's it, go on.- Get the rhythm right.
0:06:40 > 0:06:43Oh, champion. Did we break the record?
0:06:46 > 0:06:50- No, Keith.- Oh.- Sorry, Keith. - Champion!
0:06:54 > 0:06:58And now it's time for your giggles.
0:06:58 > 0:07:02- Why do giraffes have long necks? - I don't know.
0:07:02 > 0:07:04Because they have smelly feet.
0:07:09 > 0:07:12# And eyes and ears and mouth and nose
0:07:12 > 0:07:15# Heads, shoulders, knees and toes. #
0:07:15 > 0:07:18Classic. Oh, hello, Dandini.
0:07:18 > 0:07:21Wow, you've got some scrummy things to sell today, Nana.
0:07:21 > 0:07:25Thank you, Dandini. We have the finest farm shop in panto land.
0:07:25 > 0:07:28Oh, and here comes a customer.
0:07:28 > 0:07:32Hello. Welcome to Nana's panto farm shop.
0:07:32 > 0:07:37- Now, we've got apple tarts and custard pies and...- Any trifle?
0:07:37 > 0:07:40Trifle, of course we have trifle. Dandini!
0:07:40 > 0:07:44- We always keep it under the counter because of You Know Who.- Who?
0:07:44 > 0:07:49Why, that naughty farm cat, of course. He just loves cream trifle.
0:07:49 > 0:07:51So, if you see him, boys and girls,
0:07:51 > 0:07:57- I want you to shout out as loud as you can, "Stop, puss!"- Stop, puss?
0:07:57 > 0:08:03- Yes, but much louder than that.- Stop, puss!- Oh, yes, that's perfect.- Stop!
0:08:03 > 0:08:06- Puss!- All right, don't overegg your part.
0:08:06 > 0:08:09- No, no, he's taken the trifle, look.- What?
0:08:09 > 0:08:13- Oh, no. Everyone, what's do we say? - Stop, puss!
0:08:13 > 0:08:15Oh, I mean, after him.
0:08:25 > 0:08:27MOO!
0:08:30 > 0:08:32MOO!
0:08:45 > 0:08:47MOO!
0:08:49 > 0:08:54Oh, come here, you. Oh. Oh, honestly. Right, give me that, honestly.
0:08:54 > 0:08:56No, I'll have it. Oh!
0:08:58 > 0:09:00- Where's it gone?- Over here.
0:09:00 > 0:09:04Oh, look, you've eaten it already.
0:09:04 > 0:09:11- Would like anything else?- How about a nice apple pie?- Oh, yes, good idea.
0:09:11 > 0:09:15Oh, I see you've got some cream to go with it already.
0:09:15 > 0:09:21- Thank you.- Oh, I do love a happy ending. Take a bow, everyone.
0:09:21 > 0:09:23Thank you.
0:09:36 > 0:09:39GIGGLING
0:09:53 > 0:09:55It's silly time!
0:09:55 > 0:09:57MUSIC PLAYS
0:10:22 > 0:10:27# I am good Robin's minstrel and I always sing a song
0:10:27 > 0:10:31# I try to put good Robin right but he always gets it wrong. #
0:10:31 > 0:10:33Out of my way, minstrel.
0:10:33 > 0:10:36Maid Marian is in trouble and I,
0:10:36 > 0:10:39brave, brilliant Robin Hood must save her.
0:10:41 > 0:10:43Stop, Marian.
0:10:43 > 0:10:45Robin, I need to go that way.
0:10:45 > 0:10:49But beware the slime-spitting frogs.
0:10:51 > 0:10:52Slime-spitting frogs?
0:10:52 > 0:10:57The point is the bog's full of 'em. During the day they are all asleep.
0:10:57 > 0:10:58Listen.
0:10:58 > 0:11:02SNORING RIBBIT!
0:11:02 > 0:11:03So what's the problem?
0:11:03 > 0:11:06If you wake the frogs, you'll be slimed
0:11:06 > 0:11:08like you've never been slimed before.
0:11:08 > 0:11:13But never fear, just follow me through the bog very quietly.
0:11:14 > 0:11:16And no singing, got that?
0:11:16 > 0:11:19# Got that. #
0:11:23 > 0:11:27# Brave Robin knows there's danger snoozing in this swampy bog
0:11:27 > 0:11:29# So we must keep our voices down
0:11:29 > 0:11:32# Don't wake the slimy frogs
0:11:32 > 0:11:36# The frogs, the frogs, the slimy frogs, don't wake the slimy frogs! #
0:11:36 > 0:11:39Oi!
0:11:39 > 0:11:40Quiet!
0:11:42 > 0:11:44SNORING RIBBIT!
0:11:44 > 0:11:48Thankfully, I think, they're all still sleep.
0:11:48 > 0:11:50Follow me once more, fair maid.
0:11:50 > 0:11:53And remember, watch where you put your big feet.
0:11:58 > 0:12:03# Good job he's wearing dainty shoes and not a pair of clogs
0:12:03 > 0:12:07# Cos if he made a clippity clop he'd wake the slimy frogs
0:12:07 > 0:12:09- # Oh... # - Shh!
0:12:09 > 0:12:12# The frogs, the frogs, the slimy frogs
0:12:12 > 0:12:14- # Don't wake the slimy frogs. # - No!
0:12:14 > 0:12:18# The frogs, the frogs, the slimy frogs, don't wake the slimy frogs. #
0:12:18 > 0:12:21Quiet! Stop that, you silly men!
0:12:21 > 0:12:24RIBBIT!
0:12:24 > 0:12:28Er, Robin, what's that noise?
0:12:28 > 0:12:32It's the slime-spitting frogs. They're awake.
0:12:46 > 0:12:50So, who was going to get us across without being slimed?
0:12:50 > 0:12:53Ah, now, technically I did get you across.
0:12:53 > 0:12:58Surely that deserves a reward? Perhaps a little kiss?
0:12:58 > 0:13:02- Ooh, frankly I'd rather kiss the frogs. I'm off.- No!
0:13:04 > 0:13:09# The frogs, the frogs, the slimy frogs, she'd rather kiss the frogs
0:13:09 > 0:13:11# The frogs, the frogs, the slimy frogs
0:13:11 > 0:13:15# She'd rather kiss the frogs. #
0:13:15 > 0:13:19- Ribbit!- That minstrel's got to go.
0:13:23 > 0:13:26You've been watching Gigglebiz. Goodbye.
0:13:26 > 0:13:29# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz We've had a lot of fun
0:13:29 > 0:13:31# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz Ho-ho-ho
0:13:31 > 0:13:34# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz And now it's time to go
0:13:34 > 0:13:37# Gigglebiz, giggle It's time to go!
0:13:37 > 0:13:39# Cheerio, ta-ta, bye-bye
0:13:39 > 0:13:42# Farwell, TTFN, arrivederci
0:13:42 > 0:13:45# We all hate to say goodbye
0:13:45 > 0:13:47# But we'll be back again
0:13:47 > 0:13:50# Na-na na-na na-na Gigglebiz
0:13:50 > 0:13:53# Na-na na-na Ho-ho-ho
0:13:53 > 0:13:55# Na-na na-na na-na Gigglebiz
0:13:55 > 0:13:58# Na-na na It's time to go
0:13:58 > 0:14:01# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz We've had a lot of fun
0:14:01 > 0:14:03# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz Ho-ho-ho
0:14:03 > 0:14:06# Gigglebiz, Gigglebiz And now it's time to go
0:14:06 > 0:14:09# Gigglebiz, giggle It's time to go! #
0:14:10 > 0:14:12Ho-ho!