0:00:30 > 0:00:34Mm... Sometimes, just sometimes...
0:00:34 > 0:00:36I love Mondays.
0:00:36 > 0:00:38Yeah, all right, what's going on?
0:00:38 > 0:00:40You two swapped brains in your sleep?
0:00:40 > 0:00:41It's the last week of term, Dad.
0:00:41 > 0:00:44Which means no tests. Or homework.
0:00:44 > 0:00:47Mr Rock is doing an American-themed week.
0:00:47 > 0:00:51Just imagine - a whole week of fun at school!
0:00:51 > 0:00:55No learning objectives, no formal lesson structure.
0:00:55 > 0:00:58Just collages and glitter glue. I HATE glitter glue.
0:00:58 > 0:01:02Do you know what? I don't feel very well.
0:01:02 > 0:01:05I think...I think I have an incredibly high temperature.
0:01:05 > 0:01:06Nice try, Emily!
0:01:10 > 0:01:12See, just sometimes...
0:01:12 > 0:01:13Mondays rule.
0:01:19 > 0:01:20So.
0:01:20 > 0:01:22Another year over.
0:01:22 > 0:01:24Some of you have done well. Others less so.
0:01:24 > 0:01:26And, in the process, dragging us down
0:01:26 > 0:01:29below Eastbrook Academy in the league tables.
0:01:29 > 0:01:32Therefore, instead of American theme week,
0:01:32 > 0:01:35those students will attend extra classes with Ms Adolf.
0:01:35 > 0:01:38So, if you're on the right, please go and have fun with Mr Rock
0:01:38 > 0:01:40and if you're on the left...
0:01:40 > 0:01:41don't.
0:01:41 > 0:01:43Yes! On the right. I win!
0:01:43 > 0:01:44USA fun week...
0:01:44 > 0:01:47- here I come! - AMERICAN NATIONAL ANTHEM PLAYS
0:01:47 > 0:01:48MUSIC CUTS OUT
0:01:48 > 0:01:52Henry Zipzer, you're on the left. Which means you are with me.
0:01:52 > 0:01:55And I have a strictly enforced no-hats policy.
0:01:55 > 0:01:58Especially that ridiculous one. Take it off.
0:01:59 > 0:02:01Now.
0:02:01 > 0:02:03So I don't know my left from my right.
0:02:03 > 0:02:05I lose.
0:02:05 > 0:02:06Goodbye, happy fun.
0:02:08 > 0:02:10- All right, then. - Here we go...having fun!
0:02:10 > 0:02:12Left, right.
0:02:12 > 0:02:13As quickly as you can.
0:02:16 > 0:02:18ALL CHATTER
0:02:18 > 0:02:22We shall start with punctuation.
0:02:22 > 0:02:25None of you know how to use it properly with your LOLs
0:02:25 > 0:02:27and excessive use of dashes.
0:02:27 > 0:02:29First, the full stop...
0:02:29 > 0:02:33or, as it's known in North America, the period.
0:02:33 > 0:02:35A personal favourite.
0:02:35 > 0:02:37So modest.
0:02:37 > 0:02:39So pure.
0:02:39 > 0:02:44Unlike the arrogant, egotistical exclamation mark.
0:02:44 > 0:02:46ANGELIC CHOIR
0:02:46 > 0:02:48ELECTRIC GUITAR
0:02:48 > 0:02:50EXCLAMATION MARK CHUCKLES
0:02:50 > 0:02:54Ten things worse than punctuation class with Ms Adolf...
0:02:55 > 0:02:56I've got nothing.
0:02:59 > 0:03:03We are going to have such a great time.
0:03:03 > 0:03:05It is "The Wild West Trail" week.
0:03:05 > 0:03:08Ladies and gentlemen...
0:03:08 > 0:03:10You're breaking the no-hats rule.
0:03:10 > 0:03:13I know about the no-hats rule.
0:03:13 > 0:03:14I also think that hats rule!
0:03:14 > 0:03:16- LAUGHTER - Eh?!
0:03:16 > 0:03:19OK, open your maps, take a look.
0:03:19 > 0:03:2119th century, thousands of Americans
0:03:21 > 0:03:25went from one end of America to the other in order to get a better life.
0:03:25 > 0:03:29And this week, your school is your Wild West.
0:03:29 > 0:03:32You're going to run the rapids of the Platte River -
0:03:32 > 0:03:37which will be the unisex bathrooms on either floor.
0:03:37 > 0:03:41You're going to climb the Rockies - and that will be the fire escape
0:03:41 > 0:03:43on the back of the art room -
0:03:43 > 0:03:47and you're going to come face to face with the devil himself
0:03:47 > 0:03:48at the Devil's Gate...
0:03:48 > 0:03:51and that of course will be Ms Adolf's classroom.
0:03:53 > 0:03:56Don't you say that I said that - I'm looking at you, pal!
0:04:01 > 0:04:03Sorry. You can't sit next to me any more.
0:04:03 > 0:04:06My boyfriend just texted saying you and him are, like, "Rarrr."
0:04:06 > 0:04:09I'm not "Rarrr" with anybody.
0:04:09 > 0:04:11Hang on, is your boyfriend Nick McKelty?
0:04:11 > 0:04:15Yes. He really likes leotards. And my hair flick.
0:04:15 > 0:04:16So, you have to go.
0:04:18 > 0:04:21Henry Zipzer, I did not approve seat movement.
0:04:21 > 0:04:22Sit back down.
0:04:22 > 0:04:24Don't even think about it.
0:04:24 > 0:04:27Something worse than punctuation class with Ms Adolf.
0:04:27 > 0:04:30Punctuation class while hovering with my bum in the air.
0:04:31 > 0:04:33You all have dice?
0:04:33 > 0:04:36Let me see...when you get to a specific location
0:04:36 > 0:04:39you're going to roll that die, and whatever number comes up,
0:04:39 > 0:04:42that's going to be your fate - for better or for worse.
0:04:42 > 0:04:45And the first person that makes it all the way
0:04:45 > 0:04:47from one end to the other end of the trail
0:04:47 > 0:04:51will get a bunch of tickets to the Wild West Land fun park.
0:04:51 > 0:04:53- ALL:- Wow!
0:04:53 > 0:04:54Wow - that would be amazing.
0:04:54 > 0:04:57Shame you, me and Hank never win anything.
0:04:57 > 0:05:00Yeah, but have you noticed something? Hank's not here.
0:05:00 > 0:05:03Which means for once we have a real chance of winning...
0:05:03 > 0:05:05I can't believe I just said that.
0:05:05 > 0:05:07If we win the trip, he can be the guest of honour.
0:05:07 > 0:05:09- Deal?- Deal.
0:05:09 > 0:05:11But don't tell Hank what I said about the winning...
0:05:11 > 0:05:14- I didn't mean to... - Frankie, my lips are sutured.
0:05:18 > 0:05:22You will all walk to the canteen in an orderly fashion,
0:05:22 > 0:05:25where I have arranged a special treat for your lunch.
0:05:25 > 0:05:29Brain food - mackerel salad with a side order of sardines.
0:05:29 > 0:05:32Henry, I've ordered you a double serving.
0:05:32 > 0:05:34Right, now let's get our books together -
0:05:34 > 0:05:35and stop sighing like that.
0:05:45 > 0:05:48Hello, tiny dancer.
0:05:48 > 0:05:49And you are here...
0:05:49 > 0:05:51why?
0:05:51 > 0:05:54- You didn't get Mr Love's e-mail? - No, I didn't.
0:05:54 > 0:05:57And I check my in box every 12 past the hour.
0:05:57 > 0:05:59Well, you better hurry up and check your spam box,
0:05:59 > 0:06:02because Mr Love said that we should swap classes.
0:06:02 > 0:06:08He said in bold, "Ms Adolf should work with the high achievers
0:06:08 > 0:06:11"because her talents are under-utilised."
0:06:11 > 0:06:14He wants you to take over the Wild West.
0:06:14 > 0:06:19Oh...well, my talents SHOULD be more utilised.
0:06:19 > 0:06:23I was thinking the same thing. You're going to need the map.
0:06:26 > 0:06:29Oh, those kids are in for a treat!
0:06:29 > 0:06:30They are.
0:06:31 > 0:06:33They really are.
0:06:39 > 0:06:42DOLEFUL MUSIC PLAYS
0:06:44 > 0:06:48C'mon Hank, one foot in front of the other.
0:06:50 > 0:06:52Drag yourself to Ms Adolf's class.
0:07:02 > 0:07:05- Change of plan... - RECORD SCRATCHES
0:07:05 > 0:07:06I'm in charge of this classroom now
0:07:06 > 0:07:08and there's no more punctuation.
0:07:08 > 0:07:11Full stop. That was the last bit.
0:07:11 > 0:07:12Wow!
0:07:12 > 0:07:15The gods have listened, the sun is shining!
0:07:15 > 0:07:17Goodbye mackerel salads, hello fun times.
0:07:18 > 0:07:21To learn, I think you need to be inspired.
0:07:21 > 0:07:22Who inspires me?
0:07:22 > 0:07:24Bruce Springsteen and the E Street Band.
0:07:24 > 0:07:26Who inspires you?
0:07:26 > 0:07:28I want to know who your hero is
0:07:28 > 0:07:30and by the end of the week I want a presentation.
0:07:30 > 0:07:33Who knows who their hero is right now?
0:07:33 > 0:07:34Ooh, ooh! I've got my hero!
0:07:34 > 0:07:36Joelle, who's your hero?
0:07:36 > 0:07:39Me. I'm going to do my presentation on myself.
0:07:39 > 0:07:41Well, that is fantastic.
0:07:41 > 0:07:45I guess we can skip the confidence building sessions with you.
0:07:48 > 0:07:51Dysentery? Why do I have dysentery?
0:07:51 > 0:07:55You contracted it from drinking infected river water.
0:07:55 > 0:07:58Mr Rock's outcomes just weren't realistic.
0:07:58 > 0:08:01As if any of you would be capable of taming a horse.
0:08:01 > 0:08:04Hah! Realistic outcomes are...
0:08:04 > 0:08:061, you get dysentery.
0:08:06 > 0:08:082, your food runs out.
0:08:08 > 0:08:103, your oxen are stolen.
0:08:10 > 0:08:12Or 4, we catch cholera and die,
0:08:12 > 0:08:155, we fall into a ravine and die
0:08:15 > 0:08:17or 6, we lose a foot to gangrene... and die.
0:08:17 > 0:08:20Ms Adolf, there isn't a single good outcome on this list...
0:08:20 > 0:08:21I know.
0:08:21 > 0:08:24And Ashley...you should be wearing a bonnet.
0:08:25 > 0:08:27Change immediately.
0:08:27 > 0:08:29Thank you.
0:08:29 > 0:08:30This is bad.
0:08:30 > 0:08:32- Very bad.- We can still win.
0:08:32 > 0:08:35Just keep thinking about those tickets to Wild West Land.
0:08:37 > 0:08:41This is 57,000 miles better than Ms Adolf's class.
0:08:41 > 0:08:42Just one problem...
0:08:42 > 0:08:44I don't know who to do my presentation on.
0:08:44 > 0:08:46- I am totally...- Stuck?
0:08:46 > 0:08:49That's weird, I was just thinking that.
0:08:49 > 0:08:51I can recognise a stuck face 57,000 miles away.
0:08:51 > 0:08:55All right, let's do it this way... What sort of person inspires you?
0:08:55 > 0:08:57- I guess someone who's smart.- Mm-hm.
0:08:57 > 0:09:00Not classroom smart, but quick-thinking smart.
0:09:00 > 0:09:02You know, someone who can just think of something
0:09:02 > 0:09:04that nobody else could.
0:09:04 > 0:09:06Oh...somebody like you?
0:09:06 > 0:09:09Somebody like, erm... Albert Einstein.
0:09:09 > 0:09:13I have nothing in common with that giant-brained genius.
0:09:13 > 0:09:17I think you will be very surprised once you do a little research.
0:09:17 > 0:09:18Trust me.
0:09:22 > 0:09:24Don't argue.
0:09:24 > 0:09:28Number 5, you fall in a ravine and die.
0:09:28 > 0:09:29We've rolled a 6.
0:09:31 > 0:09:34- Our horse has been eaten by wolves. - Ugh.
0:09:34 > 0:09:37So, how are you going to get to Oregon now?
0:09:37 > 0:09:39Oh, that's right, you're not.
0:09:39 > 0:09:41Losers.
0:09:41 > 0:09:43Right...
0:09:43 > 0:09:45Oh, dear.
0:09:45 > 0:09:494, all your food supplies are stolen. Starvation beckons.
0:09:49 > 0:09:51- Bad luck. - Who's the loser now, McKelty?
0:09:52 > 0:09:55Yes, but neither of us needs to be.
0:09:55 > 0:09:56GUNSHOT
0:09:56 > 0:09:57GUNSHOT You have food...
0:09:57 > 0:09:59I have horses.
0:10:01 > 0:10:05Ashley, are you willing to go to the dark side, to work with the enemy?
0:10:08 > 0:10:10No.
0:10:10 > 0:10:12Yes. No.
0:10:12 > 0:10:16Come on, Ash. It doesn't mean he's our friend. It's purely business.
0:10:16 > 0:10:17You want to win, don't you?
0:10:17 > 0:10:20I suppose. On one condition.
0:10:20 > 0:10:23What happens on the Wild West Trail stays on the Wild West Trail.
0:10:23 > 0:10:25- Right?- Right.
0:10:25 > 0:10:27So, are you in?
0:10:32 > 0:10:35# La la la-la la-ley
0:10:35 > 0:10:37# La la la-ley
0:10:37 > 0:10:39# La-la la la la... #
0:10:39 > 0:10:41Are you all right, Miss Adolf?
0:10:41 > 0:10:44I am moderately happy.
0:10:44 > 0:10:47- I didn't know you had happy in you. - True.
0:10:47 > 0:10:51Normally I am to be found somewhere between mildly irritated
0:10:51 > 0:10:52and furious.
0:10:52 > 0:10:56But your Wild West activities have quite enthused me.
0:10:56 > 0:10:58Seriously?
0:10:58 > 0:11:00Thank you, Miss Adolf.
0:11:02 > 0:11:04(Wow!)
0:11:13 > 0:11:16So, how's life on the Wild West Trail?
0:11:16 > 0:11:19- It's tough out there.- The trail is long and full of darkness.
0:11:19 > 0:11:21Well, use a torch and find a shortcut!
0:11:21 > 0:11:24And whatever you do, don't let McKelty win.
0:11:26 > 0:11:27Gotta go now, Hank. Sorry.
0:11:27 > 0:11:29Yeah, me too. See ya, Hank. Bye.
0:11:29 > 0:11:32'Good job I'm so secure about being their best mate.
0:11:32 > 0:11:34'Cos I am. Totally secure.'
0:11:36 > 0:11:40I'm Mason. Mason Williams. That's my name.
0:11:40 > 0:11:43Hi, Mason Williams. I'm Hank. And you're tiny.
0:11:43 > 0:11:44Should you even be in this school?
0:11:44 > 0:11:48We're here for - what's it called - tran...
0:11:48 > 0:11:51Transition week. I absolutely do not recommend it.
0:11:51 > 0:11:55You should stay where you are. They actually let you have fun.
0:11:55 > 0:11:57Is that a dragon?
0:11:57 > 0:11:59I've got one of those, she's called Miss Adolf.
0:11:59 > 0:12:01I do it when I'm nervous.
0:12:01 > 0:12:04That's cool. They should give gold stars for that.
0:12:05 > 0:12:09Wow, drawing on yourself. You know that's what little kids do, right?
0:12:10 > 0:12:14Wow, picking on Year 6s. You know that's what cowards do, right?
0:12:14 > 0:12:18Yeah. Well, I'd rather be a coward than a...
0:12:18 > 0:12:20Oh, shut up, Zitzer.
0:12:20 > 0:12:22Oh!
0:12:24 > 0:12:26Thanks, you're cool.
0:12:27 > 0:12:30I know he's a Year 6, but I'll take it.
0:12:39 > 0:12:42I know this sounds unusual, but, er...
0:12:42 > 0:12:44I think I need to know more about Einstein.
0:12:44 > 0:12:45I know a lot about Einstein.
0:12:45 > 0:12:49Whereas I know an exceptionally large amount about him.
0:12:49 > 0:12:52First time ever, her bragging isn't annoying me. Like what?
0:12:52 > 0:12:56He developed the theories of both special and general relativity,
0:12:56 > 0:12:59he derived the equation E = MC squared
0:12:59 > 0:13:01and he won the 1921 Nobel physics prize
0:13:01 > 0:13:04for his explanation of the photoelectric effect.
0:13:04 > 0:13:08Well, that's... exactly what I was going to say.
0:13:08 > 0:13:11- Well done, Emily.- Didn't he go out with Marilyn Monroe?
0:13:11 > 0:13:14No, that was Arthur Miller, the playwright. (Back of the net!)
0:13:14 > 0:13:18- Einstein went out with the playwright Arthur Miller?- No!
0:13:20 > 0:13:22Guess I'll just look on the internet, then.
0:13:22 > 0:13:25The internet is not research. The library is research!
0:13:25 > 0:13:30No way! the library's just a terrifying mountain made of words.
0:13:30 > 0:13:34You have to feel the pages, Hank, smell the knowledge inside.
0:13:39 > 0:13:44So. Many. Heavy. Books.
0:13:47 > 0:13:52Mmmm! Best smell in the world.
0:13:52 > 0:13:54Apart from salami.
0:13:54 > 0:13:56Speaking of, er... I think
0:13:56 > 0:14:00we both need to fire up the brain with some spicy...
0:14:00 > 0:14:01- BOTH:- Sopressata.
0:14:07 > 0:14:11'Get this. Albert Einstein didn't get great marks at school.
0:14:11 > 0:14:13'He was easily bored, found it hard to concentrate
0:14:13 > 0:14:17'and didn't do as well as he should - remind you of anyone?
0:14:17 > 0:14:19'Papa Pete found out some amazing stuff too.'
0:14:19 > 0:14:24Did you know Albert Einstein once said "I have no special talents.
0:14:24 > 0:14:26"I am only passionately curious."
0:14:26 > 0:14:29I don't want to compare myself to Albert Einstein...
0:14:29 > 0:14:31but I'm passionately curious too.
0:14:31 > 0:14:33Yes... you are.
0:14:43 > 0:14:46Does Ashley love Nick? Does she want to be his girlfriend?
0:14:46 > 0:14:48I bet she can't even flick. Flick.
0:14:48 > 0:14:50What are you talking about?
0:14:50 > 0:14:52Ashley doesn't want to be Nick's girlfriend.
0:14:52 > 0:14:54Did you just say "flick" when you flicked your hair?
0:14:54 > 0:14:57It's a new thing I'm trying out. Flick.
0:14:57 > 0:14:59Are you sure she doesn't love him?
0:14:59 > 0:15:02Not in this universe or in any parallel universe.
0:15:02 > 0:15:05Or in any parallel universe of a parallel universe.
0:15:05 > 0:15:09That's the kind of thing Einstein might have said. Cool.
0:15:09 > 0:15:11Then why is she working with him? Her and Frankie.
0:15:11 > 0:15:13I have photos.
0:15:14 > 0:15:16I'm so cross. Flick.
0:15:29 > 0:15:33So my best friends are working with my worst enemy.
0:15:33 > 0:15:38But I'm cool with that. Really, honestly.
0:15:40 > 0:15:42Doesn't mean I'm going to go over and talk to them, though.
0:15:46 > 0:15:48All right, Mason Williams?
0:15:48 > 0:15:52This place is so big. I keep getting lost.
0:15:52 > 0:15:54Yeah, but you must be less nervous,
0:15:54 > 0:15:58so far today you've only drawn a very gory exploding toad.
0:15:58 > 0:16:00What's the book?
0:16:00 > 0:16:03It's about Albert Einstein. He's a physicist.
0:16:03 > 0:16:05- Sounds boring.- Actually, it's not.
0:16:05 > 0:16:07Like, when he was thinking about the speed of light,
0:16:07 > 0:16:11he actually imagined himself riding on a beam of light. Cool, eh?
0:16:11 > 0:16:13I'm doing a presentation on him.
0:16:13 > 0:16:14Can I come?
0:16:15 > 0:16:17I guess, if you want.
0:16:17 > 0:16:19I've got loads to read up about him.
0:16:19 > 0:16:21He had such an eventful life.
0:16:21 > 0:16:23Could you read it out loud, so I can hear?
0:16:26 > 0:16:28Um... yeah, OK. Sure.
0:16:29 > 0:16:32'I had to guess some of the words and skip a couple,
0:16:32 > 0:16:33'but you know what?
0:16:33 > 0:16:36'Reading aloud to someone else? That was pretty great.'
0:16:42 > 0:16:43I'm what?
0:16:45 > 0:16:47Dead. You died of cholera.
0:16:47 > 0:16:50Slowly. So now you miss all goes...forever.
0:16:51 > 0:16:55Being dead sucks. What do I do now?
0:16:55 > 0:16:58Well, you have to stay with Ashley, but you can't join in
0:16:58 > 0:17:00as you're a corpse. And Ashley, as a widow it would
0:17:00 > 0:17:03be inappropriate for you to continue the journey with an unwed man.
0:17:03 > 0:17:06- That's not fair! - Life in the Wild West wasn't fair.
0:17:08 > 0:17:11But, I am giving you a choice. You must roll again.
0:17:11 > 0:17:14Odd numbers mean you bravely risk continuing as an independent
0:17:14 > 0:17:17woman with no need of a man to give you a sense of attractiveness
0:17:17 > 0:17:19and self worth.
0:17:19 > 0:17:23Even numbers mean you marry Nicholas for protection on the road.
0:17:23 > 0:17:25Oh, please, please be an odd number.
0:17:28 > 0:17:33Ah. You marry Nicholas. He will now inherit all your food and property.
0:17:33 > 0:17:35No!
0:17:36 > 0:17:37This game is fun.
0:17:37 > 0:17:39Isn't it?
0:17:45 > 0:17:48Did you know that Albert Einstein used to play the violin
0:17:48 > 0:17:50and he gave it a name? It was...
0:17:50 > 0:17:52BOTH: Lina.
0:17:52 > 0:17:54How did you two know that?
0:17:54 > 0:17:57- Hank told us.- Mmm. He's been telling us lots of "interesting"
0:17:57 > 0:17:59facts about his new friend Albert.
0:17:59 > 0:18:01Where is he?
0:18:01 > 0:18:03He's in his room. "Being" Einstein.
0:18:06 > 0:18:07KNOCK ON DOOR
0:18:07 > 0:18:09Come. Come, enter.
0:18:09 > 0:18:12I reckon that's more the sort of thing Einstein would have
0:18:12 > 0:18:14said, rather than...
0:18:14 > 0:18:15What?!
0:18:15 > 0:18:19I was thinking that if you like I could take a look at your cards.
0:18:19 > 0:18:21See if you've made any mistakes.
0:18:21 > 0:18:23Thanks, that's really nice of you.
0:18:23 > 0:18:24Yes. I am nice.
0:18:25 > 0:18:28She's not nice. Except to Katherine.
0:18:28 > 0:18:30She only wants to read my cards.
0:18:30 > 0:18:34She's worried because I might know more about something than her.
0:18:34 > 0:18:37Why is there a drawing of a brain and then a drawing of the school?
0:18:37 > 0:18:40That's to remind me of one of my favourite quotes.
0:18:40 > 0:18:43Einstein said "Imagination is more important than knowledge."
0:18:45 > 0:18:48Imagination is more important than knowledge?
0:18:48 > 0:18:50I don't like it.
0:18:59 > 0:19:01All right, it's really early.
0:19:01 > 0:19:03I've got a presentation to prepare for and...
0:19:03 > 0:19:07OK, I admit it. I really don't want to bump into Frankie and Ashley.
0:19:09 > 0:19:11Hey.
0:19:11 > 0:19:13'This is awkward. But I'm going to be cool.'
0:19:13 > 0:19:16- Hello.- Hi.- When were you going to tell me
0:19:16 > 0:19:18you're working with McKelty?!
0:19:18 > 0:19:19OK, that wasn't cool.
0:19:19 > 0:19:22What happens on the Wild West Trail stays on the Trail.
0:19:22 > 0:19:25- So you weren't going to tell me? - We just didn't want you to be upset.
0:19:25 > 0:19:27Great job there(!)
0:19:27 > 0:19:28We just want to win.
0:19:28 > 0:19:30BOTH: For once.
0:19:30 > 0:19:33You mean, cos I'm not there to mess things up?
0:19:35 > 0:19:38No, go on, fine, go and win with McKelty, then...
0:19:38 > 0:19:41and enjoy your trip to the Wild West Land.
0:19:41 > 0:19:42With McKelty.
0:19:53 > 0:19:56'Great. So my best friends hate me
0:19:56 > 0:19:58'and I've managed to get glue all over my cards.'
0:19:58 > 0:20:00Very good. Are you ready?
0:20:00 > 0:20:05- Er. Yeah.- OK. Ladies and gentlemen, Hank Zipzer as...
0:20:07 > 0:20:09LAUGHTER
0:20:10 > 0:20:14Hello. I'm Albert Einstein, I'm a theoretical physicist with
0:20:14 > 0:20:16an amazing mind.
0:20:16 > 0:20:18When I was ten, my father showed me a compass
0:20:18 > 0:20:21and I knew that something was causing the needle to move.
0:20:25 > 0:20:28One moment, please. Arghhh.
0:20:28 > 0:20:29I can't get it off.
0:20:34 > 0:20:38I am Mason Williams, assistant to Albert Einstein.
0:20:38 > 0:20:42Yesterday, he told me that E equals MC squared.
0:20:43 > 0:20:47It sounds confusing with all the letters, but E is energy
0:20:47 > 0:20:50and I've got a lot of that, and M is mass, which is
0:20:50 > 0:20:53basically stuff, and C is the speed of light.
0:20:53 > 0:20:54TEARING
0:20:56 > 0:20:57LAUGHTER
0:20:57 > 0:21:00'And R is the rip of my trousers.'
0:21:04 > 0:21:06And L is me leaving, fast.
0:21:13 > 0:21:15Come out of there this instant.
0:21:15 > 0:21:18Let me think about that. No.
0:21:18 > 0:21:20I found these in lost property.
0:21:23 > 0:21:25I'm sorry for letting you down.
0:21:25 > 0:21:28First of all, mister, you didn't let anybody down.
0:21:28 > 0:21:31Second of all, you learned all about Einstein, you learned
0:21:31 > 0:21:34about how his brain worked, then you passed it onto somebody else.
0:21:34 > 0:21:38So, I'm giving you an A for the presentation,
0:21:38 > 0:21:40and a plus for teaching somebody else.
0:21:40 > 0:21:42How about that?
0:21:44 > 0:21:48Mr Rock, are you ill? I've never got an A plus before.
0:21:48 > 0:21:50The other teachers might pick on you.
0:21:50 > 0:21:53Well... let the chips fall where they may.
0:21:53 > 0:21:55Wow, those pants look like they were made for you.
0:21:57 > 0:22:01Oh, I see they were. Can I ask you a question?
0:22:01 > 0:22:03How did you lose an entire pair of pants?
0:22:10 > 0:22:13"You and your partner, if you have one, die from exhaustion,
0:22:13 > 0:22:16"scurvy, and being trampled by a bison."
0:22:16 > 0:22:18Ugh. We were so close!
0:22:18 > 0:22:22Great. I thought Zipzer was the loser in your gang.
0:22:22 > 0:22:24Turns out it's infectious.
0:22:24 > 0:22:26This is a horrible, horrible game.
0:22:27 > 0:22:30- ..statistics.- Well, of course it does. But how can we...
0:22:30 > 0:22:32I died, Miss, we're out.
0:22:32 > 0:22:35I thought you were taking the Literacy Progress Class, Miss Adolf?
0:22:35 > 0:22:37Yes, I was. But Mr Rock said that...
0:22:39 > 0:22:41Mr Rock!
0:22:41 > 0:22:44Mr Rock was fun. But then it changed.
0:22:44 > 0:22:47People died of horrible diseases, or they drowned.
0:22:47 > 0:22:50And the women were forced to marry annoying mean men.
0:22:50 > 0:22:53Honestly, Mr Love, our generation, we just don't know how easy we have it.
0:22:58 > 0:23:02I have been waiting a long time to hear a student say those words.
0:23:02 > 0:23:05Excellent work, Miss Adolf. Excellent work.
0:23:05 > 0:23:06Good.
0:23:16 > 0:23:20- Hank!- Wait up.- You think I can't stay mad at them? Just watch me.
0:23:22 > 0:23:24The Wild West show was a nightmare. I died!
0:23:24 > 0:23:27Even worse, I had to marry McKelty!
0:23:27 > 0:23:28Your best friend McKelty!?
0:23:28 > 0:23:31It's not our fault! We were seduced by the dark side.
0:23:31 > 0:23:33Our souls were twisted by the desire to win.
0:23:33 > 0:23:34And we had, like, no fun.
0:23:34 > 0:23:38If you want me back, you're going to have to work for it.
0:23:38 > 0:23:41First, I want a full account on how awful McKelty was,
0:23:41 > 0:23:44a huge American-style burger,
0:23:44 > 0:23:46and for starters - give me that hat right now.
0:23:49 > 0:23:52'OK...so I can't stay mad at them.'
0:23:55 > 0:23:57Can I put my name down?
0:23:57 > 0:23:59It'd be awesome to have a Japanese student to stay.
0:23:59 > 0:24:04...and the lucky student is... Hank Zipzer.
0:24:04 > 0:24:07- Yes!- I put Henry's name right at the bottom of the bucket,
0:24:07 > 0:24:08just as you said.
0:24:08 > 0:24:11We'll have Zipzer running riot and a child returning to Japan
0:24:11 > 0:24:12minus a couple of limbs.
0:24:12 > 0:24:14This is one permission slip you cannot lose.
0:24:14 > 0:24:15If you were to lose it, Henry,
0:24:15 > 0:24:19we would have to look elsewhere to host our Japanese guest.
0:24:19 > 0:24:21Guys, nothing is going to go wrong.
0:24:21 > 0:24:23May I present my permission slip.
0:24:25 > 0:24:28- It's not in here.- No permission slip, no exchange student.
0:24:28 > 0:24:31If Hank can't look after a permission slip,
0:24:31 > 0:24:33how can he be trusted to look after Yoshi?
0:24:33 > 0:24:38Let us host a special Japanese banquet.
0:24:38 > 0:24:40Sorry! Who's coming round for dinner?
0:24:40 > 0:24:43I categorically refuse. I'll be lucky to make it out alive.
0:24:43 > 0:24:46Miss Adolf is going to have an evening that she will never forget.
0:24:46 > 0:24:50Great. It's like someone created a special Hank Hell.