Episode 12

Download Subtitles

Transcript

0:00:02 > 0:00:05# If mummies, rats and fleas Ain't your thing

0:00:05 > 0:00:07# And you don't like the sound Of an exploding king

0:00:07 > 0:00:10# If you're easily scared And don't laugh at poo

0:00:10 > 0:00:13# Better turn off This show ain't for you

0:00:13 > 0:00:17# Still watching? Then, let's test your brains

0:00:17 > 0:00:20# With Horrible Histories Gory Games

0:00:20 > 0:00:22# Horrible Histories Gory...

0:00:22 > 0:00:24# Games! #

0:00:24 > 0:00:26Hello, and welcome to Gory Games,

0:00:26 > 0:00:28with me, Dave Lamb.

0:00:28 > 0:00:29And me, Rattus Rattus,

0:00:29 > 0:00:30and Dave, I have to say,

0:00:30 > 0:00:32I'm liking your shirt.

0:00:32 > 0:00:35Oh, thanks, Rattus, I really appreciate the compliment.

0:00:35 > 0:00:39It looks like someone's been sick on it and I am a big fan of sick.

0:00:39 > 0:00:41Yes, let's just get on with the show, shall we,

0:00:41 > 0:00:45and meet today's horrible historians!

0:00:45 > 0:00:47Hi, I'm Charlotte and I'm from London!

0:00:47 > 0:00:48Hello, Charlotte!

0:00:48 > 0:00:51Hi, I'm Matt and I'm from Chichester!

0:00:51 > 0:00:52Hello, Matt!

0:00:52 > 0:00:54Hi, I'm Katya and I'm from London!

0:00:54 > 0:00:55Hello, Katya!

0:00:57 > 0:01:01Welcome, everyone, you are here to win Year Spheres.

0:01:01 > 0:01:03At the end of the show,

0:01:03 > 0:01:06the person with the highest year score will win a fabulous prize

0:01:06 > 0:01:09that I found floating in the time sewer.

0:01:09 > 0:01:12Let's hope it's not one of Henry the VIII's number twos!

0:01:12 > 0:01:13Ooh, that would be a good one.

0:01:13 > 0:01:16It wouldn't actually, it'd be horrible. Time for Round One.

0:01:16 > 0:01:19What's it about? Let's go over to the Gory Grid to find out.

0:01:19 > 0:01:23It's the Frightful First World War.

0:01:23 > 0:01:26So, four questions on the First World War coming up

0:01:26 > 0:01:30and the person who gets the most right wins the first Year Sphere.

0:01:30 > 0:01:32Your four First World War topics are...

0:01:38 > 0:01:40So, Katya, you get to pick first in this round,

0:01:40 > 0:01:42which one of those takes your fancy?

0:01:42 > 0:01:44Nicknames, please.

0:01:44 > 0:01:47True or false - King George V of Britain

0:01:47 > 0:01:50was nicknamed the Fat King.

0:01:50 > 0:01:52Let's see your answers now, please.

0:01:52 > 0:01:55Katya and Matt have agreed on true,

0:01:55 > 0:01:57Charlotte thinks it's false.

0:01:57 > 0:01:59What's the actual answer?

0:01:59 > 0:02:00It's false.

0:02:00 > 0:02:03The Fat King was actually a nickname for Major Ellis,

0:02:03 > 0:02:04who set up a factory in France

0:02:04 > 0:02:07to turn animal fat into explosives for bombs.

0:02:07 > 0:02:10So if the Germans blew up one of our horses,

0:02:10 > 0:02:13we could use the horse fat to make a bomb to fire back at them.

0:02:15 > 0:02:16It's what Dobbin would've wanted.

0:02:16 > 0:02:19Well done, Charlotte, first point

0:02:19 > 0:02:21and I shall award a skull, well done.

0:02:21 > 0:02:23Matt, your turn to pick a topic.

0:02:23 > 0:02:24Laws.

0:02:24 > 0:02:28Now that, Matt, is a prop question!

0:02:28 > 0:02:31- Prop question! Prop question! Prop question! Pro...- Yeah,

0:02:31 > 0:02:32that's what I said, a prop question.

0:02:32 > 0:02:35Yes, Dave, and today's prop is in the top cupboard.

0:02:35 > 0:02:39Ah, yes, but that is precisely what you want me to think,

0:02:39 > 0:02:41so clearly, it's not in the top cupboard,

0:02:41 > 0:02:43which means it's either in the middle or the bottom.

0:02:43 > 0:02:45Now, which is it?

0:02:45 > 0:02:48Yeah, you've got me, it's actually in the bottom one.

0:02:48 > 0:02:51Ah, which is exactly what you want me to think,

0:02:51 > 0:02:54so therefore, it must be in the middle one!

0:02:54 > 0:02:55Oh!

0:02:55 > 0:02:57Too easy!

0:02:57 > 0:02:59Sorry, Dave, just a bit of fun.

0:02:59 > 0:03:02The prop was actually in the top one.

0:03:02 > 0:03:04Right. Oh, not again!

0:03:04 > 0:03:05THEY LAUGH

0:03:05 > 0:03:07That never stops being funny! I tell ya!

0:03:07 > 0:03:12It stopped being funny some time ago, Rattus. Here is the prop.

0:03:12 > 0:03:16This is a kite, so true or false -

0:03:16 > 0:03:20during the First World War, it was illegal to fly kites.

0:03:20 > 0:03:22Show me your answers now, please.

0:03:22 > 0:03:25Everybody has gone for true

0:03:25 > 0:03:27and I can tell you it is true.

0:03:27 > 0:03:30The authorities were worried it might mean

0:03:30 > 0:03:32you were sending secret messages to the Germans.

0:03:32 > 0:03:34I'm good at kite-flying.

0:03:34 > 0:03:37- Really?- Yeah, well I've always got plenty of wind, haven't I?

0:03:37 > 0:03:38HE FARTS

0:03:38 > 0:03:44Thanks for sharing that. You have all scored a point. Superb effort.

0:03:44 > 0:03:46Charlotte, it's your turn to pick a topic.

0:03:46 > 0:03:49Um...beds, please.

0:03:49 > 0:03:52True or false - in the World War I trenches,

0:03:52 > 0:03:55posh officers slept in sheds made of metal.

0:03:55 > 0:03:57Show me your answers now, please.

0:03:57 > 0:03:59Well, the girls have agreed on true,

0:03:59 > 0:04:01Matt thinks it's false.

0:04:01 > 0:04:02What's the actual answer?

0:04:02 > 0:04:06It's true, they did. While us ordinary soldiers

0:04:06 > 0:04:10had to sleep in the muddy, freezing, rat-infested trench.

0:04:10 > 0:04:13Congratulations, Katya, another point for you,

0:04:13 > 0:04:15Charlotte, another point for you.

0:04:15 > 0:04:18So one question left in this round, all still to play for.

0:04:18 > 0:04:21The question is on the French and this is what it is.

0:04:21 > 0:04:24Is this true or false?

0:04:31 > 0:04:33Show me your answers now, please.

0:04:34 > 0:04:36Everybody's gone for true,

0:04:36 > 0:04:39are they all right or are they all wrong? Let's find out.

0:04:39 > 0:04:41It's true!

0:04:41 > 0:04:44It was nonsense, of course, it was just a malicious rumour.

0:04:44 > 0:04:46- Indeed.- But it's a point for everybody

0:04:46 > 0:04:47and that means that,

0:04:47 > 0:04:49at the end of that round,

0:04:49 > 0:04:53with four out of four, Charlotte is the winner of the first Year Sphere,

0:04:53 > 0:04:55and it's time for me to say...

0:04:55 > 0:05:00All Hail The Potty Pyramid!

0:05:00 > 0:05:04UPBEAT MUSIC

0:05:07 > 0:05:10Rattus, have you been fiddling with the music?

0:05:10 > 0:05:11Yes! I like it!

0:05:11 > 0:05:15I thought it would make a change, cos it's a little bit potty!

0:05:15 > 0:05:18Well, thank you, because you've successfully destroyed the moment.

0:05:18 > 0:05:21Never mind, Charlotte, pick a Year Sphere anyway,

0:05:21 > 0:05:22but choose carefully, of course,

0:05:22 > 0:05:24because AD dates will be added to your total

0:05:24 > 0:05:26and BC dates subtracted from it.

0:05:26 > 0:05:29We'll find out what's in there at the end of the show.

0:05:29 > 0:05:32So, winning the World War I quiz means that Charlotte

0:05:32 > 0:05:35is automatically through to play the First World War game,

0:05:35 > 0:05:39but will she be alone or will everybody get to play?

0:05:39 > 0:05:41Let's find out.

0:05:44 > 0:05:47It's a single-player silly game.

0:05:47 > 0:05:51So, Charlotte, get down that time sewer on your own.

0:05:51 > 0:05:52See ya.

0:05:54 > 0:05:57In the First World War, food rations were as dull

0:05:57 > 0:05:59as the colour scheme in Rattus' house.

0:05:59 > 0:06:01- What's wrong with brown?- Everything.

0:06:01 > 0:06:03So to make their dull diet seem a little more fun,

0:06:03 > 0:06:05the British squaddies made up their own slang.

0:06:05 > 0:06:07It's time to play...

0:06:10 > 0:06:12Five foods and five novel nicknames,

0:06:12 > 0:06:15your job is to match the snack to the slang.

0:06:15 > 0:06:16Simply grab the food from the store

0:06:16 > 0:06:18and place each item

0:06:18 > 0:06:21next to the correct First World War slang name for it.

0:06:21 > 0:06:23Make your choices, then touch the stinky boot

0:06:23 > 0:06:25to see how many you've got right.

0:06:25 > 0:06:28Keep trying different combinations until you get all five correct,

0:06:28 > 0:06:31but you've got to be quick because you're against the clock,

0:06:31 > 0:06:34and your time starts now.

0:06:34 > 0:06:35HORN HONKS

0:06:35 > 0:06:38Here goes Charlotte playing Know Your Onions.

0:06:38 > 0:06:42So she has to match the foodstuff to the slang term for it.

0:06:42 > 0:06:43So those are the biscuits,

0:06:43 > 0:06:46and she thinks they were referred to as bully.

0:06:46 > 0:06:48What's rat slang for biscuits?

0:06:48 > 0:06:50HE SQUEAKS

0:06:50 > 0:06:52Yeah, I can see why you chose that.

0:06:52 > 0:06:53Now the porridge.

0:06:53 > 0:06:55What's the slang for that?

0:06:55 > 0:06:56She thinks it's muckim.

0:06:56 > 0:06:58Muckim, muckim.

0:06:58 > 0:07:02Oh, I had a bit of muckim this morning, if that's what it is.

0:07:02 > 0:07:03Anyway, she's got five things down,

0:07:03 > 0:07:04touches the boot.

0:07:04 > 0:07:06SPLASH

0:07:06 > 0:07:08You have one correct.

0:07:08 > 0:07:10- One right.- Only the one.

0:07:10 > 0:07:12Oh, dear. That's a bit of a shocker.

0:07:12 > 0:07:14So she has to move them one at a time here, Rattus,

0:07:14 > 0:07:16I think that's the key, then you can learn.

0:07:16 > 0:07:18Ah, don't think there's any real strategy in play here.

0:07:18 > 0:07:19None whatsoever.

0:07:19 > 0:07:21SPLASH

0:07:21 > 0:07:22You have none correct.

0:07:22 > 0:07:24None right.

0:07:24 > 0:07:25Well, she knows she's got to do something,

0:07:25 > 0:07:27and she needs to do it quickly.

0:07:27 > 0:07:3030 seconds remaining.

0:07:30 > 0:07:33Yes, I'm not sure this random plate-swapping's going to work.

0:07:33 > 0:07:35The only one she hasn't moved

0:07:35 > 0:07:37this time is the corned beef.

0:07:37 > 0:07:38SPLASH

0:07:38 > 0:07:41You have two correct.

0:07:41 > 0:07:44Dave, you know when you get a corn on your foot?

0:07:44 > 0:07:47- Yes.- And you know corned beef?

0:07:47 > 0:07:49Different kind of corn.

0:07:49 > 0:07:51Back to the game, I think.

0:07:51 > 0:07:53SPLASH

0:07:53 > 0:07:54You have two correct.

0:07:54 > 0:07:59Oh, dear, well, there's only seconds remaining, can she work it out?

0:07:59 > 0:08:00Time's up.

0:08:00 > 0:08:02SIREN GOES OFF

0:08:02 > 0:08:04No, she can't, and she'll be disappointed with that.

0:08:04 > 0:08:06ALL: Aw!

0:08:06 > 0:08:10Yeah. Ah, welcome back, Charlotte, welcome back.

0:08:10 > 0:08:13- Bad luck, that was very difficult, wasn't it?- Uh-huh.

0:08:13 > 0:08:15Sadly, no Year Sphere for you. I'll give you the real answers,

0:08:15 > 0:08:17just in case you ever do find yourself in a trench.

0:08:17 > 0:08:22Pozzy was jam, burgoo was porridge, but muckim was butter.

0:08:22 > 0:08:24- Oh!- Bully was corned beef

0:08:24 > 0:08:27and hard tack was what they used to call biscuit.

0:08:27 > 0:08:29OK, Round Two,

0:08:29 > 0:08:32and to find out what's up next, it's back over to the Gory Grid.

0:08:33 > 0:08:36It's the Nasty Knights.

0:08:36 > 0:08:41Four questions again, and your knights' topics are...

0:08:47 > 0:08:50So Matt, it's your turn to choose first in this round.

0:08:50 > 0:08:51Er...battles, please.

0:08:51 > 0:08:55That is a question from you know who.

0:08:58 > 0:08:59He means me!

0:08:59 > 0:09:02Hope you're ready for something stupid,

0:09:02 > 0:09:04by which I mean a stupid death.

0:09:04 > 0:09:07What was unusual about King John of Bohemia,

0:09:07 > 0:09:09who fought at the Battle of Crecy?

0:09:09 > 0:09:11A. He was blind.

0:09:11 > 0:09:14B. He was already dead.

0:09:14 > 0:09:18Or C. He fought with paper armour and a cardboard sword.

0:09:18 > 0:09:21Give me your answers now, please.

0:09:21 > 0:09:23Katya and Charlotte think it's B,

0:09:23 > 0:09:25Matt thinks the answer is A.

0:09:25 > 0:09:27Let's find out from Death

0:09:27 > 0:09:28what the actual answer is.

0:09:28 > 0:09:31The answer is...

0:09:31 > 0:09:32King John was blind.

0:09:32 > 0:09:35He rode to battle with his horse tied to two bodyguards.

0:09:35 > 0:09:37It didn't work out, he was killed.

0:09:37 > 0:09:41Talk about the blind leading the blind.

0:09:41 > 0:09:44But surely his bodyguards weren't blind.

0:09:44 > 0:09:46Don't be such a nitpicker.

0:09:46 > 0:09:47Didn't work, did it, Rattus?

0:09:47 > 0:09:49I can still hear you!

0:09:49 > 0:09:52What I meant to say is that it did work excellently, well done, Death.

0:09:52 > 0:09:55OK, that's one point then for Matt,

0:09:55 > 0:09:56congratulations.

0:09:56 > 0:09:58Charlotte, it's your turn to choose.

0:09:58 > 0:10:00Tournaments, please.

0:10:00 > 0:10:02I'll get straight to the point.

0:10:02 > 0:10:03My question is...

0:10:08 > 0:10:10A. They rode bigger horses.

0:10:10 > 0:10:13B. They used longer lances.

0:10:13 > 0:10:16Or C. They wore special armour.

0:10:16 > 0:10:18Let's have a look at your answers, please.

0:10:18 > 0:10:20The girls have agreed again on B,

0:10:20 > 0:10:23and Matt is out on his own again with C.

0:10:23 > 0:10:25Let's find out what the answer is.

0:10:25 > 0:10:26The answer is...

0:10:26 > 0:10:28They used longer lances!

0:10:28 > 0:10:30That would certainly work, wouldn't it?

0:10:30 > 0:10:32Congratulations, Katya and Charlotte.

0:10:32 > 0:10:35It's your turn to pick this time, Katya.

0:10:35 > 0:10:36German knights, please.

0:10:36 > 0:10:39A German knight called Max Woolfer went into tournaments

0:10:39 > 0:10:42with an unusual crest on his helmet.

0:10:42 > 0:10:45It was a spike, but what was impaled on it?

0:10:45 > 0:10:47A. One pig's bladder.

0:10:47 > 0:10:49B. Two roast chickens.

0:10:49 > 0:10:52Or C. Three sausages.

0:10:52 > 0:10:54Show me your answers now, please.

0:10:54 > 0:10:57The girls agreeing again,

0:10:57 > 0:10:59Matt deciding he knows best with B,

0:10:59 > 0:11:01what's the answer?

0:11:01 > 0:11:02The answer is...

0:11:04 > 0:11:07Well, there we go, no points awarded for that one,

0:11:07 > 0:11:10and there's one question left in this round

0:11:10 > 0:11:11with you all level pegging.

0:11:11 > 0:11:14The last question is on the First Crusade, here it comes.

0:11:14 > 0:11:18During the First Crusade, what did some knights believe

0:11:18 > 0:11:20God had sent to lead them to the Holy Land?

0:11:25 > 0:11:28Let's see your answers now, please.

0:11:28 > 0:11:29Total agreement at last,

0:11:29 > 0:11:32everybody thinks it's B.

0:11:32 > 0:11:33What's the answer?

0:11:33 > 0:11:36The answer is...

0:11:36 > 0:11:39The knights thought a goose would lead them to the Holy Land.

0:11:39 > 0:11:40So that's a point apiece.

0:11:40 > 0:11:42At the end of that round,

0:11:42 > 0:11:44we see it's two points each,

0:11:44 > 0:11:47that means we are going to a tie-breaker question.

0:11:49 > 0:11:51Beginning with the letter S,

0:11:51 > 0:11:54what wooden object did a knight hold in his left hand?

0:11:54 > 0:11:55Katya.

0:11:55 > 0:11:56Sword.

0:11:56 > 0:11:59It's not sword. Matt and Charlotte may buzz in. Matt.

0:11:59 > 0:12:00A shield.

0:12:00 > 0:12:03Shield is the correct answer.

0:12:03 > 0:12:05Bad luck, Katya, well done, Matt,

0:12:05 > 0:12:07help yourself to a Year Sphere.

0:12:10 > 0:12:13Remember, Matt, the later the date, the bigger the points.

0:12:14 > 0:12:16OK, Matt, as the knight quiz winner,

0:12:16 > 0:12:19you're through to play the knight game,

0:12:19 > 0:12:23but will it be just you or will the others get to play too?

0:12:23 > 0:12:24Let's find out.

0:12:27 > 0:12:30It's an all-play silly game.

0:12:30 > 0:12:33So come on, everyone, let's get back down that time sewer.

0:12:33 > 0:12:36- Lead on, Charlotte, you know the way.- Yeah.

0:12:40 > 0:12:44Becoming a knight took 14 years of training,

0:12:44 > 0:12:46and your training starts here.

0:12:46 > 0:12:48It's time to play...

0:12:50 > 0:12:53In the Middle Ages, knights would practise their jousting

0:12:53 > 0:12:55by running the rings.

0:12:55 > 0:12:58You must ride up and down your lane hooking one ring at a time

0:12:58 > 0:13:00and bringing it back to your basket.

0:13:00 > 0:13:04The first to collect six rings wins the Year Sphere. Are you ready?

0:13:04 > 0:13:06In three, two, one!

0:13:06 > 0:13:07HORN HONKS

0:13:07 > 0:13:08So off they go in Lance-A-Lot,

0:13:08 > 0:13:10and here is where they are hoping

0:13:10 > 0:13:12to, in fact, lance a lot.

0:13:12 > 0:13:15And, oh, dear me, that's a shame,

0:13:15 > 0:13:17that's two knocked down already

0:13:17 > 0:13:19by Matt and Katya.

0:13:19 > 0:13:21Charlotte's doing well though,

0:13:21 > 0:13:23she's speared her first ring.

0:13:23 > 0:13:26I don't think... I don't think Matt

0:13:26 > 0:13:28actually collected a ring that time,

0:13:28 > 0:13:31I think it had fallen off, he didn't realise.

0:13:31 > 0:13:32But Katya and Charlotte

0:13:32 > 0:13:34have both started well.

0:13:34 > 0:13:37Dave, I have to say, I don't know many horses,

0:13:37 > 0:13:39but I once had a nasty run-in with a mule.

0:13:39 > 0:13:41They can kick like...

0:13:41 > 0:13:42What's the expression? Um...

0:13:42 > 0:13:46- A mule?- That's the one!

0:13:46 > 0:13:48Yes, easy when you hear it, isn't it?

0:13:48 > 0:13:51So here we go, Matt has got his first ring there,

0:13:51 > 0:13:53but the girls are neck and neck with two each.

0:13:53 > 0:13:55And there's Matt, look at him racing along,

0:13:55 > 0:13:56trying to catch up with the girls,

0:13:56 > 0:13:59he's picked up some great speed on his horse now,

0:13:59 > 0:14:00it has to be said, Rattus.

0:14:00 > 0:14:03And look at that, he's got his game face on. Lovely!

0:14:03 > 0:14:06Oh, yes, it's all very much still to play for here.

0:14:06 > 0:14:08There are rings that are up for grabs,

0:14:08 > 0:14:11there are rings that need to be lanced, Rattus.

0:14:11 > 0:14:13That's three for Katya, three for Charlotte.

0:14:13 > 0:14:16Well, I know maths is tricky for you, Rattus, but that is halfway.

0:14:16 > 0:14:20No horses have been harmed in the making of this game at any stage.

0:14:20 > 0:14:23There was somebody got a splinter off one of them at one point

0:14:23 > 0:14:27but none of the horses have actually been harmed.

0:14:27 > 0:14:30Now, then, they're moving through this game very nicely.

0:14:30 > 0:14:33Oh! That one wiped its feet a bit, didn't it?

0:14:33 > 0:14:35So four apiece then for Katya and Charlotte,

0:14:35 > 0:14:38I think this will be an out-and-out fight between them.

0:14:38 > 0:14:42Oh, but Charlotte's just knocked that ring off, that could cost her.

0:14:42 > 0:14:45Matt's doing very well here but the girls, they've just got

0:14:45 > 0:14:48that extra leg speed and that precision

0:14:48 > 0:14:50when it comes to dropping the rings in the basket.

0:14:50 > 0:14:53Oh, case in point there, Rattus, case in point.

0:14:53 > 0:14:56Oh, well, oh, Katya's twirling her lance round like a baton,

0:14:56 > 0:14:58not sure that's going to help.

0:14:58 > 0:15:01She needs to focus because Charlotte has got her fifth.

0:15:01 > 0:15:04If Katya can get this one through, she's going to win.

0:15:04 > 0:15:06Look at that, she's got it in place,

0:15:06 > 0:15:09she's just got to drop this into the basket.

0:15:11 > 0:15:13- Oh, no!- She's missed! She's missed!

0:15:13 > 0:15:15It was in, Rattus, and then it was out!

0:15:15 > 0:15:17And that means Charlotte behind her

0:15:17 > 0:15:18is surely going to win this!

0:15:18 > 0:15:20Yes, she's done it!

0:15:20 > 0:15:23Charlotte runs rings around them all and she is delighted!

0:15:24 > 0:15:28Charlotte, yeah, that's right, help yourself to a Year Sphere,

0:15:28 > 0:15:30very well played.

0:15:30 > 0:15:32That was close! How was it for you?

0:15:32 > 0:15:37Um...Matt dropped his, so that's when I thought it's my chance to catch up.

0:15:37 > 0:15:41So Matt dropping his made you think you were still in with a chance?

0:15:41 > 0:15:42Yeah, so I started running.

0:15:42 > 0:15:45So half of that Year Sphere is Matt's, effectively.

0:15:45 > 0:15:48- Yeah.- No, it's not, we're not going to take that away from you.

0:15:48 > 0:15:50Well done, everyone. Round Three,

0:15:50 > 0:15:54and it's over to the Gory Grid to find out what's up next.

0:15:54 > 0:15:56It's the Awful Egyptians.

0:15:57 > 0:16:02Four questions, as always, and here are your four Egyptian topics...

0:16:08 > 0:16:10So, Charlotte, what will you have?

0:16:10 > 0:16:11Toilets, please.

0:16:11 > 0:16:13You won't be surprised to learn

0:16:13 > 0:16:16that that is a question from Rattus Rattus.

0:16:16 > 0:16:21True or false - Egyptians invented the toilet seat.

0:16:21 > 0:16:23Let's see your answers now, please.

0:16:23 > 0:16:25Everybody thinks that's false.

0:16:25 > 0:16:28Rattus, are they all right or are they all wrong?

0:16:28 > 0:16:29It's true!

0:16:29 > 0:16:32The toilet seat was made by cutting a hole in the middle of a stool,

0:16:32 > 0:16:35so their own stool could drop down through the stool

0:16:35 > 0:16:37into a box of sand!

0:16:37 > 0:16:39Yeah, Rattus, too much detail.

0:16:39 > 0:16:42No points awarded there and Katya, it's your turn to pick a topic.

0:16:42 > 0:16:44The afterlife, please.

0:16:44 > 0:16:46True or false -

0:16:46 > 0:16:49when he died, the ancient Egyptian King Zur

0:16:49 > 0:16:53had all of his servants given land and gold.

0:16:53 > 0:16:55Let's see your answers now, please.

0:16:55 > 0:16:59They're all in total agreement again, this is getting a bit spooky.

0:16:59 > 0:17:00What's the answer?

0:17:00 > 0:17:02It's false!

0:17:02 > 0:17:05At King Zur's funeral 338 of his servants were killed,

0:17:05 > 0:17:08so they could work for him in the afterlife.

0:17:08 > 0:17:10Well, they should've read the small print in the contract.

0:17:10 > 0:17:12They should've done that.

0:17:12 > 0:17:13If I'd read the small print in mine,

0:17:13 > 0:17:16I'd have found out that I was presenting with a talking rat.

0:17:16 > 0:17:20Still, points all round there, lovely. We're all off the mark.

0:17:20 > 0:17:22Matt, it's your turn to choose.

0:17:22 > 0:17:24Ramesses II.

0:17:24 > 0:17:26True or false -

0:17:26 > 0:17:30when Pharaoh Ramesses II failed to win at the Battle of Kadesh,

0:17:30 > 0:17:32he just pretended he had won.

0:17:32 > 0:17:34Let's see your answers, please.

0:17:34 > 0:17:37They're all in total agreement again.

0:17:37 > 0:17:39This time, they all think it's true. What's the answer?

0:17:39 > 0:17:41Well, it's true!

0:17:41 > 0:17:45He built huge statues and temples commemorating his famous 'victory'.

0:17:45 > 0:17:47Honestly, some people.

0:17:48 > 0:17:50So if you don't win today,

0:17:50 > 0:17:52just build a huge statue and pretend you did.

0:17:52 > 0:17:54Well done, that's points all round again.

0:17:54 > 0:17:56Look at that, it's two points apiece,

0:17:56 > 0:18:00and this is the final question and it's going to be asked right now.

0:18:00 > 0:18:03Is this true or false?

0:18:10 > 0:18:12Answer that question now.

0:18:12 > 0:18:14Katya and Matt still agreeing on true,

0:18:14 > 0:18:17but Charlotte thinks that's false.

0:18:17 > 0:18:18What is the answer?

0:18:18 > 0:18:21It's true!

0:18:21 > 0:18:24Excellent, Katya and Matt, well played, a point apiece there,

0:18:24 > 0:18:28and that means we have a tie-breaker situation.

0:18:30 > 0:18:31Beginning with the letter S,

0:18:31 > 0:18:33what is the name for the huge statue

0:18:33 > 0:18:35in the Egyptian desert...? Yes.

0:18:35 > 0:18:36The Sphinx.

0:18:36 > 0:18:40Katya says Sphinx. The full question was - beginning with the letter S,

0:18:40 > 0:18:43what is the name for the huge statue in the Egyptian desert

0:18:43 > 0:18:45of a lion's body with a man's face?

0:18:45 > 0:18:48You're absolutely right, Katya, it was the Sphinx.

0:18:48 > 0:18:51Help yourself to your first Year Sphere.

0:18:51 > 0:18:53Everyone's got one, well done.

0:18:55 > 0:18:56Katya, you've won the Egyptian quiz,

0:18:56 > 0:18:59so you're through to play the Egyptian game,

0:18:59 > 0:19:02but will you be playing on your own or will the others get to play too?

0:19:02 > 0:19:04Let's find out.

0:19:07 > 0:19:11It's a single-player scary game.

0:19:11 > 0:19:12So take a deep breath

0:19:12 > 0:19:15and get yourselves down that time sewer, Katya.

0:19:15 > 0:19:16Whoo!

0:19:16 > 0:19:17Be brave.

0:19:19 > 0:19:22Having an amateur try their hand at mummification

0:19:22 > 0:19:23would be a terrible idea,

0:19:23 > 0:19:26so that's precisely what we're going to do.

0:19:26 > 0:19:27It's time to play...

0:19:30 > 0:19:32The embalmer who mummified this pharaoh

0:19:32 > 0:19:34forgot to remove some organs.

0:19:34 > 0:19:37Your challenge is to find and remove the stomach, liver,

0:19:37 > 0:19:41intestines and lungs and put them in the correct Canopic jars.

0:19:41 > 0:19:43The brain needs to be yanked out through the nose and binned,

0:19:43 > 0:19:45and you'll also need to bin the bladder,

0:19:45 > 0:19:48but the heart must be left inside the body.

0:19:48 > 0:19:51Got it? Well, let's hope so, as your time starts now.

0:19:51 > 0:19:53HORN HONKS

0:19:53 > 0:19:56So here goes Katya with Mummify Me

0:19:56 > 0:19:58and she's gone straight for the nose implement.

0:19:58 > 0:20:01And I should warn you, this can be a bit graphic.

0:20:01 > 0:20:04Oh, Rattus, that's going to smart a bit, isn't it?

0:20:04 > 0:20:07- Ow.- Hook up the nozzle, ouch.

0:20:07 > 0:20:08Now, Rattus,

0:20:08 > 0:20:10I'm not sure that's the whole brain,

0:20:10 > 0:20:12that looks like a tiny piece of the frontal lobe,

0:20:12 > 0:20:16but at least she's put it in the bin where it belongs.

0:20:16 > 0:20:19- What do you think she's after now, Rattus?- Er, well,

0:20:19 > 0:20:21- certainly not a snake, Dave. - Well, that is a snake,

0:20:21 > 0:20:24I mean, that...that clearly shouldn't have been in there,

0:20:24 > 0:20:26but, oh, my goodness me, she seems to be thinking

0:20:26 > 0:20:28about what jar she's going to put that in, I think.

0:20:28 > 0:20:31No, I've not actually seen intestines live and in the flesh,

0:20:31 > 0:20:34but I'd imagine they don't look like that.

0:20:34 > 0:20:38What's she going to do with it? In the bin. Yes.

0:20:38 > 0:20:41I've never understood the point of bandaging a mummy,

0:20:41 > 0:20:43it's not like they're going to get better, is it?

0:20:43 > 0:20:44True indeed, Rattus,

0:20:44 > 0:20:45slight misunderstanding,

0:20:45 > 0:20:47but true nonetheless.

0:20:47 > 0:20:49Now, that for me is the stomach, Rattus.

0:20:49 > 0:20:52She's now checking which Canopic jar.

0:20:52 > 0:20:55Very well done, that's textbook.

0:20:55 > 0:20:57Dave, have you ever tried eating a stomach?

0:20:57 > 0:21:00It's basically a meal within a meal. Delicious.

0:21:00 > 0:21:03Now, what's this she's working on here?

0:21:03 > 0:21:05- Oh, my goodness. - Oh, it's the bladder!

0:21:05 > 0:21:08- It's the bladder, it's weeing everywhere!- It's got to be,

0:21:08 > 0:21:09judging by the amount of wee.

0:21:09 > 0:21:11Well, one thing we can learn here

0:21:11 > 0:21:14is that that mummy must've died needing the loo,

0:21:14 > 0:21:17because there was an awful lot of wee still in it.

0:21:17 > 0:21:18Thank goodness for that.

0:21:18 > 0:21:21Hopefully, that's the last we've seen of the bladder.

0:21:21 > 0:21:23She's down in the intestinal area.

0:21:23 > 0:21:2530 seconds remaining.

0:21:25 > 0:21:28And now, it's the pulling game.

0:21:28 > 0:21:31Like some grizzly tug-of-war, the mummy against Katya,

0:21:31 > 0:21:33and goodness me, it's going on for ever.

0:21:33 > 0:21:34There they all are.

0:21:34 > 0:21:37Those have got to be stuffed into that jar, haven't they?

0:21:37 > 0:21:40- Stuffed right in.- Easier to pull them out than stuff them in, Dave.

0:21:40 > 0:21:42Yes, and seconds are ticking away here.

0:21:42 > 0:21:45I'm not sure if she's got time to be tangled up in guts,

0:21:45 > 0:21:47she's still got the liver and lungs to go.

0:21:47 > 0:21:50She can't take the heart, she wants the lungs.

0:21:50 > 0:21:51- Lungs, lungs.- Lungs, lungs.

0:21:51 > 0:21:55Now she's found a liver, what was that doing up there?

0:21:55 > 0:21:56Time's up.

0:21:56 > 0:21:57- It's all over!- It's all over!

0:21:57 > 0:21:59Oh, what a shame!

0:22:00 > 0:22:05Bad luck, bad luck, you got close, but you just ran out of time there.

0:22:05 > 0:22:07Unfortunately, no Year Sphere.

0:22:07 > 0:22:10So it's time for the final round and we go over to the Gory Grid

0:22:10 > 0:22:12one last time to find out what we've got.

0:22:14 > 0:22:16It's the Measly Middle Ages.

0:22:17 > 0:22:19No quirky quiz in our final round,

0:22:19 > 0:22:23so it's straight to our big all-play endgame.

0:22:23 > 0:22:27Ooh! Does it have poo in it? Does it? Does it? Does it?

0:22:27 > 0:22:29Yes, yes, yes, it's got poo in it.

0:22:29 > 0:22:31Hurrah!

0:22:31 > 0:22:34Get down that time sewer with the lot of you.

0:22:35 > 0:22:37- Bye.- Bye.

0:22:37 > 0:22:39See you soon!

0:22:39 > 0:22:41It's time to go...

0:22:43 > 0:22:47You've all just got yourselves a job emptying cesspits. Congratulations.

0:22:47 > 0:22:50You have to collect the gong from the pit,

0:22:50 > 0:22:53carry it along your lane and slop it into your measuring cylinder,

0:22:53 > 0:22:55and whoever collects the most gong,

0:22:55 > 0:22:57gets themselves a Year Sphere.

0:22:57 > 0:23:01Ready? Three, number twos, number one, go!

0:23:01 > 0:23:02HORN HONKS

0:23:02 > 0:23:04They're clean now, look at them, pristine,

0:23:04 > 0:23:06but that's about to end

0:23:06 > 0:23:08because they're off down to the other end of the lane,

0:23:08 > 0:23:10where the poo awaits.

0:23:10 > 0:23:12And look at that, that's terrific farming.

0:23:12 > 0:23:16Now, oh, Katya's flying down that lane, that's incredibly quick.

0:23:16 > 0:23:18Not that much poop delivered,

0:23:18 > 0:23:20but that one, now that is what you call a full payload,

0:23:20 > 0:23:23that is extraordinary.

0:23:23 > 0:23:26Maybe Matt added to that halfway down his lane,

0:23:26 > 0:23:28he could've had a secret poop into his own bag.

0:23:28 > 0:23:31Oh! Katya's lost her footing already,

0:23:31 > 0:23:33and you don't want to slip over in that, Rattus.

0:23:33 > 0:23:36And here comes Matt again! Look at it! He's swimming in it!

0:23:36 > 0:23:40There is poo everywhere, Rattus. You must be loving this!

0:23:40 > 0:23:42Going to get me water wings on.

0:23:42 > 0:23:45Yeah, get your water wings and get out there and enjoy it.

0:23:45 > 0:23:50It's poo time, all day, particularly at the end of Matt's lane.

0:23:50 > 0:23:53Look at this, look, watch how much it gives him here.

0:23:53 > 0:23:56- Look at it, he's almost filled it! - It's almost full!

0:23:56 > 0:23:59This is ridiculous! He is amazing!

0:23:59 > 0:24:02Some Middle Ages people wouldn't even bother with a cesspit,

0:24:02 > 0:24:04they'd just poo directly onto the street.

0:24:04 > 0:24:06Oh!

0:24:06 > 0:24:08Oh! And there's some now, look at that.

0:24:08 > 0:24:1130 seconds remaining.

0:24:11 > 0:24:13Well, this is where it gets very, very slippery.

0:24:13 > 0:24:15You don't tend to see much more gong

0:24:15 > 0:24:18delivered after the huge poo deluge.

0:24:18 > 0:24:20Time is ticking,

0:24:20 > 0:24:22I think the girls are going to struggle to beat Matt now.

0:24:22 > 0:24:29But oh dear me, Katya is all over the place here, oh, and so is Matt.

0:24:29 > 0:24:32Oh, there's gong everywhere!

0:24:32 > 0:24:33Oh, Charlotte there

0:24:33 > 0:24:36making a valiant last stab to deliver some more gong,

0:24:36 > 0:24:39but I think Matt's got this one in the bag! Literally.

0:24:39 > 0:24:40Time's up.

0:24:40 > 0:24:43Yes, it's all over, well, it's all over Katya,

0:24:43 > 0:24:46it's all over Charlotte, well, it's all over all of them, to be fair,

0:24:46 > 0:24:50and Matt has won that with an extraordinary amount of poo.

0:24:52 > 0:24:55Welcome back, gong farmers, terrific work.

0:24:55 > 0:24:57I'm glad to see you're all cleaned up.

0:24:57 > 0:25:00The winner, with the most amount of gong farmed

0:25:00 > 0:25:03in the history of the programme, was Matt.

0:25:03 > 0:25:04Help yourself to another Year Sphere.

0:25:04 > 0:25:06Remarkable, wasn't it Rattus, that?

0:25:06 > 0:25:10It was, it was amazing, it was almost spilling over the top.

0:25:10 > 0:25:13Right, now it's time to count up those Year Spheres

0:25:13 > 0:25:18and remember, AD dates are added and BC dates are subtracted.

0:25:18 > 0:25:20It's the moment of truth.

0:25:20 > 0:25:24So, Katya, let's have a look at that first Year Sphere.

0:25:24 > 0:25:28Oh, it's a good one, 1891 AD,

0:25:28 > 0:25:29school was made free

0:25:29 > 0:25:31for every child that year.

0:25:31 > 0:25:33Matt, let's see what you can do.

0:25:35 > 0:25:381305 AD,

0:25:38 > 0:25:40the execution of William Wallace was that year.

0:25:40 > 0:25:43So it all hinges on what's in that second one, let's have a look.

0:25:45 > 0:25:47Oh, it's 64 AD,

0:25:47 > 0:25:49the Great Fire of Rome was that year.

0:25:49 > 0:25:53That leaves you with a total of 1369,

0:25:53 > 0:25:55which is not enough to beat Katya.

0:25:55 > 0:25:59So, Charlotte, you've got 1891 to beat.

0:26:01 > 0:26:041845 AD,

0:26:04 > 0:26:07the Great Potato Famine in Ireland.

0:26:07 > 0:26:09That means you are currently

0:26:09 > 0:26:1146 behind.

0:26:11 > 0:26:13Let's have a look at that second one.

0:26:14 > 0:26:181099 AD! Fantastic.

0:26:18 > 0:26:20The First Crusade was that year.

0:26:20 > 0:26:22That means that, Charlotte,

0:26:22 > 0:26:27you are today's winner with 2,944 points.

0:26:27 > 0:26:30All that means, of course, that you have won the sort of prize

0:26:30 > 0:26:34that will drive all your friends wild with jealousy,

0:26:34 > 0:26:37providing, of course, that all your friends are into old junk

0:26:37 > 0:26:38that's been fished out of the sewer.

0:26:38 > 0:26:40What have you got for us today, Rattus?

0:26:40 > 0:26:44Oh, it's a prize that's really full of heart,

0:26:44 > 0:26:48because it's a heart wrapped in a poem!

0:26:48 > 0:26:51Specifically, the heart of Georgian poet Percy Shelley,

0:26:51 > 0:26:56whose wife kept it wrapped up in one of his poems when he died.

0:26:56 > 0:26:57Well, a poem, you say.

0:26:57 > 0:27:02The prize is a rotten old heart, about as welcome as a stinky...

0:27:02 > 0:27:04RATTUS RATTUS FARTS

0:27:04 > 0:27:05Well, my way would've rhymed.

0:27:05 > 0:27:08- Anyway, there you go, Charlotte, congratulations.- Thank you.

0:27:08 > 0:27:10Keep a safe distance away from it.

0:27:10 > 0:27:14Well done also to our runners-up, Katya and Matt,

0:27:14 > 0:27:17who'll be taking a trip home that they will never forget,

0:27:17 > 0:27:19because it's going to be so horrible.

0:27:19 > 0:27:22Yes, I'm afraid we're flushing you two back down the time sewer.

0:27:22 > 0:27:23Off you go.

0:27:25 > 0:27:26Bye, Matt.

0:27:28 > 0:27:29Bye, Katya.

0:27:40 > 0:27:43I've been Dave Lamb, he has been Rattus Rattus...

0:27:43 > 0:27:45And he's been Marcus the flea.

0:27:45 > 0:27:47You've been watching Gory Games, goodbye.

0:27:47 > 0:27:49- Say goodbye, Marcus.- Goodbye.

0:27:49 > 0:27:53# If mummies, rats and fleas Ain't your thing

0:27:53 > 0:27:55# And you don't like the sound Of an exploding king

0:27:55 > 0:27:58# If you're easily scared And don't laugh at poo

0:27:58 > 0:28:01# Better turn off This show ain't for you

0:28:01 > 0:28:05# Still watching? Then, let's test your brains

0:28:05 > 0:28:09# With Horrible Histories Gory Games

0:28:09 > 0:28:11# Horrible Histories Gory...

0:28:11 > 0:28:12# Games! #