0:00:02 > 0:00:05# If mummies, rats and fleas ain't your thing
0:00:05 > 0:00:07# And you don't like the sound of an exploding king
0:00:07 > 0:00:10# If you're easily scared and don't laugh at poo
0:00:10 > 0:00:13# You better turn off This show ain't for you
0:00:13 > 0:00:18# Still watching? Then let's test your brains
0:00:18 > 0:00:20# With Horrible Histories Gory Games
0:00:20 > 0:00:24# Horrible Histories Gory...Games! #
0:00:24 > 0:00:26Hello and welcome to Gory Games with me,
0:00:26 > 0:00:30Dave Lamb and my glamourless assistant, Rattus Rattus.
0:00:30 > 0:00:32- Did you just say "glamourless"? - Yes, I did.
0:00:32 > 0:00:36This is the show where you test your knowledge of horrible histories
0:00:36 > 0:00:39with quirky quiz questions and gory games,
0:00:39 > 0:00:43set by the country's finest historical brains and Rattus Rattus.
0:00:43 > 0:00:44The cheek!
0:00:44 > 0:00:48Without further ado, let's meet today's horrible historians.
0:00:48 > 0:00:51- Hi, I'm Jeevan.- Hi, I'm Kate. - Hi, I'm Billy.
0:00:51 > 0:00:52Good hellos all round.
0:00:52 > 0:00:56Right, let's get things started with a nice Stone Age warm-up game
0:00:56 > 0:00:58called Bow and Arrow.
0:00:58 > 0:01:01This is a target game where you fire rubber arrows
0:01:01 > 0:01:03at a drawing of a bison, is it?
0:01:03 > 0:01:06- No. Not exactly, no.- I thought not.
0:01:06 > 0:01:09Over in Sweden, Stone-Age people used to fire arrows
0:01:09 > 0:01:13into the corpses of their recently dead relatives.
0:01:13 > 0:01:14So our contestants will be firing
0:01:14 > 0:01:18- sharp stone-headed arrows directly into...- Oh, no, no. No way!
0:01:18 > 0:01:20Not on my watch they're not!
0:01:20 > 0:01:24I'm not letting them fire arrows into a corpse!
0:01:24 > 0:01:26- Where is this corpse, anyway?- Ah, yes.
0:01:26 > 0:01:28Er, Dave... I've got a favour to ask of you.
0:01:28 > 0:01:32You know how you're really kind of old and close to death anyway?
0:01:32 > 0:01:35- I was thinking, maybe you could be the corpse...- No, no, no.
0:01:35 > 0:01:39- Is that a no, then?- Yes, it's a no. - Spoil sport.
0:01:39 > 0:01:43Right, Jeevan, Kate and Billy, you're playing for Year Spheres.
0:01:43 > 0:01:46Each Year Sphere contains a historical date
0:01:46 > 0:01:49and at the end of the show yours will be added together,
0:01:49 > 0:01:57with AD dates being ADDED to your total and BC dates being SUBTRACTED.
0:01:57 > 0:01:58You see what we've done?
0:01:58 > 0:02:01So, if these were your Year Spheres, your total would be, Rattus?
0:02:01 > 0:02:05- Er, more than some but less than lots.- 735.
0:02:05 > 0:02:06Like I said.
0:02:06 > 0:02:09At the end of the show, the person with the highest year score
0:02:09 > 0:02:12will win a fantastic prize as selected by yours truly.
0:02:12 > 0:02:16Yes, I wouldn't get too excited about that. Let's get cracking.
0:02:16 > 0:02:19To find out what this round is about, it's over to the Gory Grid.
0:02:19 > 0:02:22Arr! The Putrid Pirates it be.
0:02:22 > 0:02:25And your four pirate topics are:
0:02:30 > 0:02:33So, Jeevan, you pick first. Which takes your fancy?
0:02:33 > 0:02:36- Can I have rules, please? - Rules, it is.
0:02:36 > 0:02:42True or false - Black Bart had strict rules on his pirate ship?
0:02:42 > 0:02:47One of the rules was that it was lights out at 8pm every night.
0:02:47 > 0:02:51Let's have your answers. Well, a clean sweep of trues.
0:02:51 > 0:02:54Let's find out what the answer is.
0:02:54 > 0:02:55It's true.
0:02:55 > 0:02:58Lights and candles had to be put out at 8pm.
0:02:58 > 0:03:02Though I can just put the lights out by putting my hand over my good eye!
0:03:02 > 0:03:07Ah! Oh! Sorry. I'm afraid of the dark.
0:03:07 > 0:03:11Yes, a slight misunderstanding there. But well done, you lot.
0:03:11 > 0:03:15Three points scored. Kate, your turn to pick a topic.
0:03:15 > 0:03:18Can I have superstitions, please?
0:03:18 > 0:03:24True or false - us pirates would never eat sea turtles.
0:03:24 > 0:03:28- It was considered bad luck.- True or false? Let me see your answers now.
0:03:30 > 0:03:33Another clean sweep of agreement. All going for true.
0:03:33 > 0:03:35Let's hear what the answer is.
0:03:35 > 0:03:41It's...false. Sea turtles were delicious. So bad luck for them.
0:03:41 > 0:03:44They were ideal food for long voyages.
0:03:44 > 0:03:47Just flip them on their backs and they couldn't go anywhere.
0:03:47 > 0:03:51You could keep them alive for months till you wanted fresh meat.
0:03:51 > 0:03:53Oh, that's cruel!
0:03:53 > 0:03:55What? I'm a pirate. Of course I'm cruel!
0:03:55 > 0:03:58Of course he's cruel. He's a pirate.
0:03:58 > 0:04:00Billy, it's your turn to pick a topic.
0:04:00 > 0:04:03Medicine, please.
0:04:03 > 0:04:06You will be delighted to hear this is a prop question.
0:04:06 > 0:04:08- Oh, I like a prop question! - Here it comes.
0:04:08 > 0:04:12Here comes the prop. Look at that. That is a small old saw.
0:04:12 > 0:04:15True or false, aboard a pirate ship,
0:04:15 > 0:04:19the ship's carpenter was often in charge of surgery.
0:04:19 > 0:04:22Let's see your answers now. Oh, all three going for true.
0:04:22 > 0:04:27I can tell you you're absolutely right. Few pirate ships had doctors
0:04:27 > 0:04:30and carpenters were good with a saw so they did the amputations.
0:04:30 > 0:04:36They could saw off your leg and make you a wooden one. Simple.
0:04:36 > 0:04:38- Oh, sorry, Rattus. I'll put that down.- Thank you.
0:04:38 > 0:04:42So the final question of this round...
0:04:42 > 0:04:45and it is a question from Rattus.
0:04:45 > 0:04:47Hm? Oh, yes.
0:04:47 > 0:04:54Is this true or false - a Georgian pirate once became an archbishop?
0:04:54 > 0:04:55Let's see your answers.
0:04:56 > 0:05:01All gone for the same again! This is uncanny! They've all gone for true.
0:05:01 > 0:05:05Well it IS true. Lancelot Blackburne went from being a pirate
0:05:05 > 0:05:09to becoming Archbishop of York. Bet you wouldn't sleep
0:05:09 > 0:05:12- during one of his sermons! - Absolutely not.
0:05:12 > 0:05:15Because it's all square in this round,
0:05:15 > 0:05:18we have the buzzer question.
0:05:18 > 0:05:20Beginning with the letter B, what is... Hello!
0:05:20 > 0:05:25- Billy, what do you think? - Blackbeard.- Let's hear the question.
0:05:25 > 0:05:28Beginning with B, what is infamous pirate Edward Teach better known as?
0:05:28 > 0:05:31Blackbeard was absolutely right!
0:05:31 > 0:05:32So Billy has won the quiz.
0:05:32 > 0:05:36Time for you to choose your Year Sphere from the trolley wally.
0:05:36 > 0:05:37Oi, do you mind?
0:05:37 > 0:05:41Push, push, push, push, push! Oh, well done, Billy.
0:05:41 > 0:05:45Come and choose your Year Sphere - any one you want.
0:05:45 > 0:05:50I hope it isn't a Stone Age date, worth a few million minus points.
0:05:50 > 0:05:53- Push, push, push! - Thanks, Trolley Wally!
0:05:53 > 0:05:57Now, winning the quiz means Billy is through to play the pirate game
0:05:57 > 0:06:01but will he be alone or will everyone play? Let's find out.
0:06:04 > 0:06:07It's an All Play messy game! That means one thing -
0:06:07 > 0:06:10it's off down the Time Sewer with the lot of you!
0:06:10 > 0:06:14Go on! Off you go, Billy. Lead the way. In you go, fella.
0:06:14 > 0:06:18- In you go, Kate. Go on, Jeevan, get in there!- Ugh!- It doesn't stink.
0:06:18 > 0:06:22I don't know what you're talking about.
0:06:22 > 0:06:25This game is all about chests and keys. Where are the keys?
0:06:25 > 0:06:29That would be telling! There are some clues to help you find them.
0:06:29 > 0:06:31The first person to retrieve the treasure map
0:06:31 > 0:06:34from their colour-coded chests will win but, be warned,
0:06:34 > 0:06:37there may be some pirate trickery afoot.
0:06:37 > 0:06:39RATTUS LAUGHS LIKE A PIRATE
0:06:39 > 0:06:42- Finished?- Sorry.- It's time for:
0:06:44 > 0:06:46HORN BLARES
0:06:46 > 0:06:50Here we go with Pirate Treasure. All reading the instructions.
0:06:50 > 0:06:52- That's good, isn't it?- Certainly is.
0:06:52 > 0:06:54Part of the game, reading the instructions, Dave.
0:06:54 > 0:06:57And Billy should be off to the Swabbie's bucket... No!
0:06:57 > 0:06:59He's gone to the fruit!
0:06:59 > 0:07:01Now, he's gone to the rotten fruit bucket.
0:07:01 > 0:07:04Kate's all right, she should be there. There's Billy's clue.
0:07:04 > 0:07:06He should be at Swabbie's bucket.
0:07:06 > 0:07:10He isn't. He's gone to the rotten fruit. So that key will not fit.
0:07:10 > 0:07:14Look at the slime on those keys, though, Rattus.
0:07:14 > 0:07:18It really is quite revolting! And Billy, of course, struggling away.
0:07:18 > 0:07:22But who's going to be first? It's Jeevan. Jeevan is off and running.
0:07:22 > 0:07:25Kate now, second behind Jeevan.
0:07:25 > 0:07:28And Billy is simply not going to get into that chest.
0:07:28 > 0:07:33So, who is going to get that second chest open first? Let's have a look.
0:07:33 > 0:07:35Billy, quite rightly, has given up
0:07:35 > 0:07:37but he's thrown the key on the floor.
0:07:37 > 0:07:40- No-one likes that. Almost dissent.- Temper, temper!
0:07:40 > 0:07:43There's Kate, getting up to her elbows in the horrible bucket there.
0:07:43 > 0:07:46Absolutely revolting. Oh! She's on the right track.
0:07:46 > 0:07:50She's forging ahead. Oh, and that is revolting.
0:07:50 > 0:07:53Oh, and he's in the wrong bucket again! But here comes Billy.
0:07:53 > 0:07:55Now he's moving. Now he's shifting.
0:07:55 > 0:07:57Let's have a look at that clue.
0:07:57 > 0:07:59"Which bird says 'pieces of eight'?"
0:07:59 > 0:08:01That's a parrot. There's the parrot!
0:08:01 > 0:08:05Kate is on the last one. She just needs to look in the hanging bag.
0:08:05 > 0:08:07I think Kate might be on her way.
0:08:07 > 0:08:09This is the last chest that she's undoing.
0:08:09 > 0:08:14Everyone doing extremely well here now, apart from Jeevan of course!
0:08:14 > 0:08:16He's in the wrong bucket. Tell him!
0:08:16 > 0:08:19Put him out of his misery! And Kate has won it!
0:08:19 > 0:08:22She holds aloft the treasure map
0:08:22 > 0:08:25that tells of glories beyond our thinking.
0:08:25 > 0:08:28And Jeevan could be looking in there all day
0:08:28 > 0:08:31because he's looking in the wrong bucket.
0:08:31 > 0:08:34- That is a yellow bucket. You are wearing green.- Oh!
0:08:34 > 0:08:38Welcome back, gamers. Kate, you won, so get choosing a Year Sphere.
0:08:38 > 0:08:42No wonder rats like it so much on pirate ships.
0:08:42 > 0:08:45Rotten fruit, deck moppings, what's not to like?!
0:08:45 > 0:08:49- Um...all the rats?- Humph!
0:08:49 > 0:08:52On to Round 2 and to find out what's up next, it's back to the Gory Grid.
0:08:52 > 0:08:55It's the vicious Vikings.
0:08:55 > 0:08:58And here are your all-important Viking topics.
0:09:03 > 0:09:08Kate, it's your turn to pick first. What takes your fancy?
0:09:08 > 0:09:09Viking Myths.
0:09:09 > 0:09:12Let's see if you know this one.
0:09:20 > 0:09:26Well, a complete spread of answers there. Interesting indeed.
0:09:26 > 0:09:29- Let's hear the answer. - The answer is...
0:09:29 > 0:09:33Well, there we go. A point for Kate.
0:09:33 > 0:09:35The dwarves were called North, South, East and West.
0:09:35 > 0:09:37Hey, it's a hard job, holding up the sky.
0:09:37 > 0:09:42I bet the dwarves were all grumpy! You know, like the dwarf?!
0:09:42 > 0:09:46- Do you get it? Dopey...? - Never work with animals.
0:09:46 > 0:09:48Billy, your turn to pick a topic.
0:09:48 > 0:09:51Warriors.
0:09:51 > 0:09:54Viking warriors who worked themselves up into a foaming,
0:09:54 > 0:09:58fighting frenzy before battle were called:
0:10:04 > 0:10:06Is it A, B or C?
0:10:06 > 0:10:11And everyone has gone for B. Let's find out what the answer is.
0:10:11 > 0:10:14The answer is...B!
0:10:14 > 0:10:18That's me! Arf! Arf! Arf! I'm joking. I'm fine, I'm fine.
0:10:18 > 0:10:22He is crazy! A point each there, look at that!
0:10:22 > 0:10:27And we get the word berserk, that we use now, from Viking berserkers.
0:10:27 > 0:10:31- The Lamb knows all.- Oi! That's my line!- It's horrible but it's true.
0:10:31 > 0:10:34- And that's my line too! - Live with it!
0:10:34 > 0:10:37- I'm going off you.- Jeevan, your turn to pick a topic.
0:10:37 > 0:10:39Can I have swords, please?
0:10:39 > 0:10:42That is a prop question.
0:10:42 > 0:10:44Oh, a prop question! I like props.
0:10:44 > 0:10:47- Maybe I don't like the props. - Behold, a massive sword.- A sword.
0:10:47 > 0:10:53Viking blacksmiths sometimes cooled hot swords in what?
0:10:57 > 0:11:00Let's see your answers, please.
0:11:00 > 0:11:02Everybody's gone for C again.
0:11:02 > 0:11:05And everybody is right. They are!
0:11:05 > 0:11:10We have one question left in this round. Here is your question.
0:11:10 > 0:11:13What was a Viking skald?
0:11:18 > 0:11:20Yum, yum, yum!
0:11:20 > 0:11:24Give me your answers now. Everybody's gone for A.
0:11:24 > 0:11:26The answer is B!
0:11:26 > 0:11:32A skald was a Viking storyteller who'd recite long, wonderful poems.
0:11:32 > 0:11:35That means, Kate, that you have won the second Year Sphere.
0:11:35 > 0:11:38OK. Kate, as the quiz winner,
0:11:38 > 0:11:40you're also through to play the Viking game
0:11:40 > 0:11:46but will it be just you or will the others get play too? Let's find out.
0:11:49 > 0:11:53- It's a single player brainy game! - Wahey!- So, Kate, come on.
0:11:53 > 0:11:56Down to that Time Sewer with you! Go on, get down there.
0:11:56 > 0:11:59There she goes. Bye!
0:11:59 > 0:12:01It's time to play the:
0:12:06 > 0:12:09Now, Vikings are known in history by nicknames.
0:12:09 > 0:12:12One Viking king, for example, was known as Harald Finehair.
0:12:12 > 0:12:16We would have been Dave the Wise and Rattus Bad Joke.
0:12:16 > 0:12:18Oi! I'm just here! I can hear, you know.
0:12:18 > 0:12:20I know, you were meant to.
0:12:20 > 0:12:22Seven Viking names but two are made up.
0:12:22 > 0:12:24You have to work out which five are real.
0:12:24 > 0:12:28Choose five names and then move them to the real board.
0:12:28 > 0:12:31Then touch the Viking axe - not the sharp edge, mind -
0:12:31 > 0:12:32to find out how many you've got right.
0:12:32 > 0:12:35Keep trying new combinations until you've got all five.
0:12:35 > 0:12:37You've got to be quick. You're against the clock.
0:12:37 > 0:12:39Your time starts....now!
0:12:39 > 0:12:42HORN BLARES
0:12:42 > 0:12:46So here goes Kate, trying to work out which are the real Viking names.
0:12:46 > 0:12:50Asgot The Clumsy goes up. That's her most real one.
0:12:50 > 0:12:54Kon Smelly-Feet is what she thinks is second most real.
0:12:54 > 0:12:57Eric Bloodaxe. Well, that sounds right.
0:12:57 > 0:12:59Sounds a convincing Viking name.
0:12:59 > 0:13:02It's not a name you'd expect on a modern-day vicar.
0:13:02 > 0:13:05SCREAM!
0:13:05 > 0:13:07Right, four right. What are her tactics?
0:13:07 > 0:13:11She going to change one at a time? There's Bloodaxe.
0:13:11 > 0:13:14I think Bloodaxe might have been right. Yes.
0:13:14 > 0:13:17Still got four. And what do we have...?
0:13:17 > 0:13:20Ivar the Boneless, Keith Flatnose is up there. Kettle the Trout Face.
0:13:20 > 0:13:23Dave, I actually know someone with a trout face.
0:13:23 > 0:13:25Although she is actually a trout.
0:13:25 > 0:13:29Well, this trout face has been replaced with Ivar the Boneless.
0:13:29 > 0:13:34Still got four. Ivar the Boneless is off again.
0:13:34 > 0:13:38Trout Face is going on! I'm beginning to question her tactics.
0:13:38 > 0:13:41She seems to be swapping things back and forth willy-nilly.
0:13:41 > 0:13:44A random scatter-gun approach.
0:13:44 > 0:13:46Still only four right.
0:13:46 > 0:13:48She's a bit disappointed she hasn't got all five.
0:13:48 > 0:13:52Things being replaced and then put back without much consideration.
0:13:52 > 0:13:55Now Jalla the Jellybean's up there. That's definitely wrong!
0:13:55 > 0:13:59She's moved it. She only had three. Ivar the Boneless is back.
0:13:59 > 0:14:01- DONG! - 30 seconds remaining.
0:14:01 > 0:14:04Ah, Smelly Feet, that's right! This could be good!
0:14:04 > 0:14:06You have all five right!
0:14:06 > 0:14:10A sudden burst at the end. She's got all five!
0:14:10 > 0:14:13Well done, Kate. Help yourself to another Year Sphere.
0:14:13 > 0:14:18She was absolutely right. There was no Viking called Jalla the Jellybean
0:14:18 > 0:14:21and there was no Kon known for his stinky feet.
0:14:21 > 0:14:25Hey, Dave, guess which Viking gave its name to a mobile-phone device?
0:14:25 > 0:14:30I don't know, Eric Big Bills? Olaf Dodgy Reception?
0:14:30 > 0:14:33Nope, it was Harald Bluetooth. It's not a joke, no.
0:14:33 > 0:14:37The modern-day bluetooth wireless connection is named after him.
0:14:37 > 0:14:40Harold united different Viking tribes under a single king
0:14:40 > 0:14:45and the bluetooth connection unites different mobiles. Rat knows all. Ha!
0:14:45 > 0:14:47That was very interesting, Rattus, well done.
0:14:47 > 0:14:50Over to the Gory Grid to find out what's up next.
0:14:50 > 0:14:53It's the Awful Egyptians!
0:14:53 > 0:14:55Here are your four Egyptian topics.
0:15:00 > 0:15:05- Mummies!- Billy, it's your turn to go first, so please choose a topic.
0:15:05 > 0:15:08May I please go for Cleopatra?
0:15:08 > 0:15:13True or false - Cleopatra was very beautiful?
0:15:14 > 0:15:18The boys think that Cleopatra was ugly.
0:15:18 > 0:15:20Whereas Kate thinks she was beautiful.
0:15:20 > 0:15:23Let's find out what the actual answer is.
0:15:23 > 0:15:28It's false. Coins with her picture show she had a huge, crooked nose
0:15:28 > 0:15:31but I wouldn't recommend calling her ugly to her face.
0:15:31 > 0:15:33That'll happen.
0:15:33 > 0:15:35Neither would I! So, Kate,
0:15:35 > 0:15:38lovely that you thought she was beautiful but she wasn't.
0:15:38 > 0:15:41She was horrible. Jeevan, your turn. What's your topic?
0:15:41 > 0:15:45- Can I have Mummies, please? - That is a prop question.
0:15:45 > 0:15:47- Yes!- I like the props.- Look at this.
0:15:47 > 0:15:53- Now, that is actually a mummy's hand in a display case.- Is it actually?
0:15:53 > 0:15:58It is actually a mummy's hand. True or false,
0:15:58 > 0:16:01in Victorian times an ancient Egyptian mummy's hand,
0:16:01 > 0:16:05in a glass display case, was a popular ornament?
0:16:05 > 0:16:08Is that true or false? So, Billy and Kate go for true.
0:16:08 > 0:16:10Jeevan going for false.
0:16:10 > 0:16:13The answer is that it is true! Yes.
0:16:13 > 0:16:18It's a lovely gift and, of course, the mummy's hand comes pre-wrapped.
0:16:18 > 0:16:21That means, Kate, it's your turn to pick a topic.
0:16:21 > 0:16:23Pharaohs, please.
0:16:23 > 0:16:28True or false, inside a dead pharaoh's burial chamber
0:16:28 > 0:16:30you might find lots of dolls?
0:16:30 > 0:16:34Well, look at that. Everyone has gone for false.
0:16:34 > 0:16:36Let's hear the answer.
0:16:36 > 0:16:39It's true! We believed our Shabti dolls
0:16:39 > 0:16:42would magically turn into servants in the after life.
0:16:42 > 0:16:46And they better do! I'm not going to pick my own bunions for eternity!
0:16:46 > 0:16:48No way, Jose!
0:16:48 > 0:16:49No. And why should he have to?
0:16:49 > 0:16:53So everybody wrong but that means, with one question left,
0:16:53 > 0:16:55Billy, if you get this, you've won.
0:16:55 > 0:16:58Let's have a look at our final question.
0:16:58 > 0:17:02The question is, is this true or false?
0:17:05 > 0:17:09Billy goes true, Kate and Jeevan go false.
0:17:09 > 0:17:12It's...false!
0:17:12 > 0:17:16Well, it's false. You know, when archaeologists found his tomb
0:17:16 > 0:17:19and unwrapped the mummy, the body of Ramesses was so well-preserved
0:17:19 > 0:17:22that it was obvious that he'd been overweight.
0:17:22 > 0:17:26And to think death is usually a sure-fire way of losing weight!
0:17:26 > 0:17:31You know, cos you rot away and your little bits all fall off you and...
0:17:31 > 0:17:35- Too far, Rattus.- Yes, Dave. I'll wind my neck in.- Please do so now.
0:17:35 > 0:17:38So what we've ended up with at the end of that round
0:17:38 > 0:17:40is a tie-break situation.
0:17:40 > 0:17:43That means we go straight to a buzzer question.
0:17:43 > 0:17:46Beginning with the letter N,
0:17:46 > 0:17:48what is the name of the 4,000-mile-long river...?
0:17:48 > 0:17:49BUZZER!
0:17:49 > 0:17:51Kate was first in. What's the answer, Kate?
0:17:51 > 0:17:55- Nile.- Nile is the correct answer, Kate!- Oh, well done.
0:17:55 > 0:17:57You've won yourself another Year Sphere.
0:17:57 > 0:18:02Oh, with so many Year Spheres, I hope it's not a Stone-Age stinker!
0:18:02 > 0:18:04Absolutely! It's a fair point.
0:18:04 > 0:18:07OK, Kate, you're through to play the Egyptian game
0:18:07 > 0:18:10but will it be just you or is everyone coming too? Let's find out.
0:18:14 > 0:18:18It's a single player scary game! I'm sorry, lads.
0:18:18 > 0:18:21Kate - back into the Time Sewer. Let me open it first.
0:18:21 > 0:18:24Go on, down you go. Get down there.
0:18:24 > 0:18:28When pharaohs died, all sorts of weird stuff went on.
0:18:28 > 0:18:30It's time to play:
0:18:31 > 0:18:35Whoever mummified this pharaoh forgot to remove some organs
0:18:35 > 0:18:36and you've got to fix things.
0:18:36 > 0:18:41Your challenge is to remove the stomach, liver, intestines and lungs
0:18:41 > 0:18:44and put them in the correct Canopic jars.
0:18:44 > 0:18:48The brain needs to be yanked out of the nose and binned
0:18:48 > 0:18:51but the heart must be left inside. Got that? Good!
0:18:51 > 0:18:54Don't let your time run out if you want to win.
0:18:54 > 0:18:56In three, two, one...
0:18:56 > 0:18:58HORN BLARES
0:18:58 > 0:19:01So, here comes Kate to play Mummify Me.
0:19:01 > 0:19:04She has to remove the organs, put them in the jars,
0:19:04 > 0:19:06but she must leave the heart inside.
0:19:06 > 0:19:09She's going for the brain. I can't watch, Rattus!
0:19:09 > 0:19:11Oh! The hook up the nose into the brain,
0:19:11 > 0:19:17and out through the nostrils with all the pulpy brain matter.
0:19:17 > 0:19:19Look at that! He must have been one brainy Pharaoh.
0:19:19 > 0:19:23There go the brain, the strings of the brain.
0:19:23 > 0:19:27That's gone straight into the bin as it should have done.
0:19:27 > 0:19:28She's made a good start.
0:19:28 > 0:19:32Now she's going in to try and remove some organs. There's something.
0:19:32 > 0:19:35Look at that! Oh, Rattus.
0:19:35 > 0:19:37It's the intestine, look at the length of it.
0:19:37 > 0:19:40She has to wind it round her arm to get it out!
0:19:40 > 0:19:44It's dribbling across from the Canopic jar to the mummy!
0:19:44 > 0:19:47She's pulling it across the room, this is grisly in the extreme!
0:19:47 > 0:19:51- There's the end of it. - Thank goodness that's over.
0:19:51 > 0:19:53That was making me feel queasy.
0:19:53 > 0:19:57This is exactly what would have been done in the day, Rattus.
0:19:57 > 0:19:59This is absolutely authentic.
0:19:59 > 0:20:04Not sure it was done by a small child in safety goggles, though.
0:20:04 > 0:20:08No. That is the only bit about this that is inauthentic.
0:20:08 > 0:20:12She's got a liver in one hand, stomach in the other.
0:20:12 > 0:20:15So, where to put the stomach? That's correct.
0:20:15 > 0:20:18The liver, where does that go? She's got to find...
0:20:18 > 0:20:21There it is! That's the liver, perfect. She just needs the lungs.
0:20:21 > 0:20:24She's hit the mummy there, fantastic!
0:20:24 > 0:20:28She's got him again. Is that the heart? I think it's a lung.
0:20:28 > 0:20:33- It's the lungs!- She's done it, she's got it all in the right place.
0:20:33 > 0:20:36- Kate has done it.- If that was me, I'd be licking my fingers.
0:20:36 > 0:20:39Rattus, that is disgusting.
0:20:39 > 0:20:44Welcome back, Kate. Help yourself to another Year Sphere.
0:20:44 > 0:20:46Did you know that some people in Egypt
0:20:46 > 0:20:49could only afford a cheap version of mummification,
0:20:49 > 0:20:51with no organ removal,
0:20:51 > 0:20:56but you had to inject cedar oil up your behind to dissolve your guts.
0:20:56 > 0:20:59That would have made a much better game! Ho-ho!
0:20:59 > 0:21:02Let's do that one! Can we? Please, please, please?
0:21:02 > 0:21:05No. Moving right along. Time for the final round.
0:21:05 > 0:21:08Over to the Gory Grid one last time to find out what we've got.
0:21:08 > 0:21:11It's the measly Middle Ages.
0:21:11 > 0:21:14No quirky quiz in our final round.
0:21:14 > 0:21:17It's straight to our big all-play Middle Ages endgame.
0:21:17 > 0:21:20And it is a messy one. Oh, yes.
0:21:20 > 0:21:24Everybody, it's time to get down that sewer.
0:21:24 > 0:21:28Down you go. Go on, Billy. Well done, Kate. You know the way by now.
0:21:28 > 0:21:31- Jeevan, follow Kate, she knows what she's doing.- Ha ha ha ha!
0:21:31 > 0:21:33And they've gone.
0:21:33 > 0:21:36A well-paid job in the Middle Ages was the job of gong farming.
0:21:36 > 0:21:40Why well paid? Because it was one of the nastiest jobs around.
0:21:40 > 0:21:44Yes, gong was a Middle Ages word for poop.
0:21:44 > 0:21:48Your job is to collect gong from the cesspit, carry it along your lane
0:21:48 > 0:21:50and slop it into a measuring cylinder.
0:21:50 > 0:21:54Whoever collects the most collects the Year Sphere, but beware.
0:21:54 > 0:21:58Some Middle Ages types would poo directly onto the street below.
0:21:58 > 0:22:02So your lane is going to get very, very slippery indeed.
0:22:02 > 0:22:06It's time for us to go...
0:22:06 > 0:22:08- Get slopping! - HORN HONKS
0:22:08 > 0:22:11Lovely clean lanes, look. That won't last long.
0:22:11 > 0:22:13- You're right there, Dave. - There we go.
0:22:13 > 0:22:16Straight down to the end, very good work from Kate.
0:22:16 > 0:22:18Billy and Jeevan are there.
0:22:18 > 0:22:21Look at the hole in the bottom of these buckets,
0:22:21 > 0:22:23it'll make it very treacherous underfoot.
0:22:23 > 0:22:26That's the smallest amount of gong I've ever seen farmed.
0:22:26 > 0:22:28It really was a tiny amount.
0:22:28 > 0:22:32And these mats become treacherous when wet, don't they, Rattus?
0:22:32 > 0:22:36They certainly do, Dave. The last thing you want on here is gong.
0:22:36 > 0:22:39It's going to hold the whole proceedings up.
0:22:39 > 0:22:42Not much gong is making it to the measuring cylinder.
0:22:42 > 0:22:46All of them struggling with the massive hole.
0:22:46 > 0:22:50Look at that, it's spilt everywhere! Jeevan has got absolutely nowhere.
0:22:50 > 0:22:52And here comes Kate.
0:22:52 > 0:22:55There doesn't look to be much left in that bucket either.
0:22:55 > 0:22:59I don't want to worry everyone, but there's more gong on the way.
0:22:59 > 0:23:04- Oh, and he's over! Oh, and she's on her bottom!- Everyone is falling.
0:23:04 > 0:23:06There's gong everywhere.
0:23:06 > 0:23:08And to be fair, the contestants are now covered it.
0:23:08 > 0:23:12They're scooping the poop, but they're not managing to deposit it.
0:23:12 > 0:23:15They're like bars of soap on an ice rink.
0:23:15 > 0:23:18And finally, Jeevan's made it to the end!
0:23:18 > 0:23:21I mean, that is empty, Jeevan. You might as well head back.
0:23:21 > 0:23:24With the best will in the world, that is empty.
0:23:24 > 0:23:26Look at the amount he's collected.
0:23:26 > 0:23:30The merest smudge, if that. And I'm being kind to him
0:23:30 > 0:23:33by calling it a smudge. There we go.
0:23:33 > 0:23:38Look at this, compared to Jeevan, Billy is absolutely rolling in gong.
0:23:38 > 0:23:40Kate's got a respectable amount of poo too.
0:23:40 > 0:23:44I've never seem quite so much effort and energy being put in
0:23:44 > 0:23:46to such little return.
0:23:46 > 0:23:49- Oh, and there's more gong dropping now!- Ohhh! Ho ho!
0:23:49 > 0:23:52Well, as if it wasn't slippery enough.
0:23:52 > 0:23:54There is now gong absolutely everywhere.
0:23:54 > 0:23:57- Still dripping!- '30 seconds remain.'
0:23:57 > 0:24:01I can't see an awful lot more gong being...
0:24:01 > 0:24:04As Billy just slides off the end of his ramp there.
0:24:04 > 0:24:06A little bit, fair play to him,
0:24:06 > 0:24:08a little bit came through at the end there.
0:24:08 > 0:24:12Tremendous effort. But now he's got to get back up the other end.
0:24:12 > 0:24:14I don't think it's going to happen for him.
0:24:14 > 0:24:18He's got a bit of a lick on there. Careful, he will fall off the end!
0:24:18 > 0:24:21Oh, dear me. She's got a mouthful!
0:24:21 > 0:24:23- Oh, that's a disaster.- Oh, no, no!
0:24:23 > 0:24:26- HORN HONKS - Now this really is sickening scenes
0:24:26 > 0:24:29here at the gong farming. Jeevan, you're too late, son.
0:24:29 > 0:24:33You've only got a tiny amount in there. Awful, awful.
0:24:33 > 0:24:36Kate's done a lot better to be fair. But the winner,
0:24:36 > 0:24:38by little more than a smear, is Billy.
0:24:38 > 0:24:42Welcome back. Billy, you got the most poop in your cylinder,
0:24:42 > 0:24:45so collect your Year Sphere, please. Well done, Jeevan.
0:24:45 > 0:24:46- Bad luck.- Dear BBC.
0:24:46 > 0:24:50I was disgusted to find out that the so-called poo in the endgame
0:24:50 > 0:24:53was in fact not real poo at all!
0:24:53 > 0:24:57Did you know that gong farmers were only actually allowed to gong farm
0:24:57 > 0:25:00between 9pm and 5am so as not to disgust people?
0:25:00 > 0:25:04I'll never know what's disgusting about wallowing around in poop!
0:25:04 > 0:25:09No. I don't suppose you ever will. Time to count up those Year Spheres.
0:25:09 > 0:25:14And remember, AD years are added, and BC years are subtracted.
0:25:14 > 0:25:18Jeevan, I can tell you exactly how many points you've got.
0:25:18 > 0:25:22It's none, because you haven't got any Year Spheres. But, don't worry.
0:25:22 > 0:25:27Because that could end up being the winning score. So hang in there.
0:25:27 > 0:25:30OK, Kate, let's have a look inside those spheres.
0:25:30 > 0:25:34Oh, it's 1.5 million BC!
0:25:34 > 0:25:38Stone-Age man first used fire. What about the next one?
0:25:39 > 0:25:431666, the Great Fire of London. Next one, please.
0:25:43 > 0:25:471337, the beginning of the Hundred Years' War with France.
0:25:49 > 0:25:541455, the start of the War Of The Roses. And your final sphere.
0:25:56 > 0:26:01Oh, no! 2532 BC.
0:26:01 > 0:26:04The great Egyptian Sphinx was finished that year.
0:26:04 > 0:26:08So Kate, your total score has ended up being
0:26:08 > 0:26:131,498,074...minus!
0:26:13 > 0:26:16Oh, dear. Billy, let's have a look inside yours.
0:26:18 > 0:26:231914 AD. The beginning of the First World War.
0:26:23 > 0:26:27And this one, for the game, what's inside the crucial sphere?
0:26:27 > 0:26:33Oh, it's 776 BC, the first ever ancient Olympics.
0:26:33 > 0:26:35But it's not enough to wipe out your total,
0:26:35 > 0:26:40so that means that today's winner with 1138 points is Billy,
0:26:40 > 0:26:43who walks away with the star prize!
0:26:43 > 0:26:47Which, unfortunately, has once again been pulled out of the time sewers
0:26:47 > 0:26:51by my flea-infested friend. What's the big prize, Rattus?
0:26:51 > 0:26:54It's the ultimate fashion accessory.
0:26:54 > 0:26:58If you happen to be an ancient Celt, that is! It's a brain ball!
0:26:58 > 0:27:03Yes, the Celts would take the brain of an enemy, harden it in lime,
0:27:03 > 0:27:06and attach it to their belts. Ha ha!
0:27:06 > 0:27:09- Cong-RAT-ulations, Billy! - Billy, well done.
0:27:09 > 0:27:12I can only apologise for that wonderful brain
0:27:12 > 0:27:14- you seem to have won. - Thank you very much.
0:27:14 > 0:27:18Right, it just remains for me to say thanks to our champion, Billy.
0:27:18 > 0:27:22Thanks to our gallant runners-up, Jeevan and Kate.
0:27:22 > 0:27:26- And no thanks whatsoever to Rattus. - Eh? Oh, thank you! I love you too.
0:27:26 > 0:27:31- You've been watching Gory Games. Goodbye!- Goodbye!
0:27:31 > 0:27:33# Was that show messy enough for you?
0:27:33 > 0:27:36# Or would you have preferred a little more poo?
0:27:36 > 0:27:39# Have you had your fill of blood, guts and gore?
0:27:39 > 0:27:42# Or have we left you still wanting more?
0:27:42 > 0:27:44# Well, keep watching
0:27:44 > 0:27:46# We'll be back again
0:27:46 > 0:27:49# With Horrible Histories Gory Games
0:27:49 > 0:27:52# Horrible Histories Gory...Games! #
0:27:52 > 0:27:54Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd