0:00:02 > 0:00:03# Terrible Tudors, Gorgeous Georgians
0:00:03 > 0:00:04#Slimy Stuarts, vile Victorians
0:00:04 > 0:00:07# Woeful wars, ferocious fights Dingy castles, daring knights
0:00:07 > 0:00:09# Horrors that defy description Cut-throat Celts, awful Egyptians
0:00:09 > 0:00:12# Vicious Vikings, cruel crimes Punishment from ancient times
0:00:12 > 0:00:13# Romans, rotten, rank and ruthless
0:00:13 > 0:00:15#Cavemen, savage, fierce and toothless
0:00:15 > 0:00:18# Groovy Greeks, brainy sages Mean and measly Middle Ages
0:00:18 > 0:00:20# Gory stories, we do that
0:00:20 > 0:00:23# And your host, a talking rat
0:00:23 > 0:00:26# The past is no longer a mystery
0:00:26 > 0:00:27# Welcome to...
0:00:27 > 0:00:32# Horrible Histories. #
0:00:32 > 0:00:36Horrible Histories presents...
0:00:36 > 0:00:39Since the dawn of time,
0:00:39 > 0:00:41when humankind first set foot outside Africa,
0:00:41 > 0:00:44we have thirsted for new lands and new adventures.
0:00:44 > 0:00:48- Have you ever been here before? - No, never left the Middle East,
0:00:48 > 0:00:51none of us have. I'm not sure I'd like the food.
0:00:51 > 0:00:57Well, great, then I'm the first man to set foot on this land.
0:00:57 > 0:01:00I'm Ugg and I have discovered Europe.
0:01:05 > 0:01:13Hello. I think you are a Neanderthal and I've just discovered you, so...
0:01:13 > 0:01:16Humankind continued to spread across the globe, crossing mighty oceans,
0:01:16 > 0:01:19discovering uninhabited new lands.
0:01:19 > 0:01:22I am the Viking Leif Erikson,
0:01:22 > 0:01:28and I am the first man ever to step foot on this new, undiscovered land.
0:01:30 > 0:01:32Oh, hello. Welcome to my home.
0:01:32 > 0:01:34Would you like anything? Water?
0:01:34 > 0:01:35We've got still or sparkling.
0:01:35 > 0:01:38Go away. Go away.
0:01:38 > 0:01:41Crossing mighty oceans, braving the unknown.
0:01:41 > 0:01:47I, Captain James Cook, am the first man ever to claim this new land
0:01:47 > 0:01:51for the British Empire, Australia.
0:01:51 > 0:01:55Oi, we floated here on a log thousands of years ago.
0:01:55 > 0:01:57Or was it a crocodile?
0:01:59 > 0:02:02Can you hear something? It sounded like a wallaby or something.
0:02:02 > 0:02:04Go away.
0:02:04 > 0:02:07And so the story of human exploration continues.
0:02:08 > 0:02:12Hi, I'm Neil Armstrong, I'm the first man ever to step...
0:02:12 > 0:02:13Hang on,
0:02:14 > 0:02:17there's definitely no-one else here already, is there?
0:02:19 > 0:02:22It's me, Buzz Aldrin, second man on the moon.
0:02:22 > 0:02:25Sorry, this bit is really about first man, Buzz.
0:02:25 > 0:02:28A great name, though.
0:02:28 > 0:02:31The explorers get ready for the journey.
0:02:32 > 0:02:34OK, that's it, go away to the Eagle.
0:02:35 > 0:02:36Now.
0:02:40 > 0:02:43Do you know, I don't know why there's all this fuss
0:02:43 > 0:02:44about visiting the moon.
0:02:44 > 0:02:45There's not much atmosphere.
0:02:45 > 0:02:47Not much atmosphere.
0:02:47 > 0:02:50OK, so we know all about the first person to land on the moon,
0:02:50 > 0:02:54or cross the Atlantic, but no-one seems to care about the first rats.
0:02:54 > 0:02:58That's why I'm going to become a great explorer and find the source
0:02:58 > 0:03:00of ye ancient sewer pipe.
0:03:00 > 0:03:04It's a bit like when the Roman emperor Nero wanted to discover the
0:03:04 > 0:03:05source of the River Nile in Africa.
0:03:05 > 0:03:09Imagine setting out on that journey with no map, no sat nav,
0:03:09 > 0:03:11no idea what you might see.
0:03:11 > 0:03:14Turned out to be just as tricky as it sounds.
0:03:16 > 0:03:18The first century AD,
0:03:18 > 0:03:20and with the mighty Roman Empire covering the known world,
0:03:20 > 0:03:24its glorious emperor decides to send his envoys into the unknown.
0:03:24 > 0:03:26Go forth and find the source of the Nile.
0:03:26 > 0:03:28Claim it in the name of the emperor.
0:03:31 > 0:03:35The glory of Rome, we will find the source of the River Nile.
0:03:35 > 0:03:37- To the glory of...- Are you good?
0:03:37 > 0:03:42- Yes, I'm all right.- It's really slippery...
0:03:44 > 0:03:46I got in my mouth.
0:03:48 > 0:03:51- For the glory of Rome.- For the glory of...
0:03:54 > 0:03:56I think I've lost my helmet.
0:03:56 > 0:03:58I've lost my boots. I think.
0:04:04 > 0:04:06For the love of...
0:04:09 > 0:04:10I hate to be a stick in the mud,
0:04:10 > 0:04:13but is it just me or have we not actually moved?
0:04:13 > 0:04:18- For months?- Yes, we've moved. We've definitely moved.
0:04:23 > 0:04:25Yes, that's my helmet, no, we haven't moved.
0:04:25 > 0:04:27We're never going to find the source of the Nile.
0:04:27 > 0:04:29Stick the standard in and let's go home.
0:04:31 > 0:04:32For the glory of Rome!
0:04:34 > 0:04:35Done. Hometime.
0:04:38 > 0:04:40- Oh.- These Romans are crazy.
0:04:40 > 0:04:42- He's got your boots on.- Oi, come back with those!
0:04:48 > 0:04:52We Vikings wouldn't let a little mud stop us on our travels across Europe
0:04:52 > 0:04:56and beyond. We braved ice, oceans, sea monsters.
0:04:56 > 0:04:58OK, maybe not monsters,
0:04:58 > 0:05:01but it was an incredible feat for one people to achieve.
0:05:01 > 0:05:03But then we weren't one people.
0:05:03 > 0:05:08There were lots of different Vikings from Sweden, Denmark and Norway.
0:05:08 > 0:05:10People just couldn't tell us apart.
0:05:12 > 0:05:16Officer, my home, ruined by Vikings.
0:05:16 > 0:05:18Now, don't you worry, madam.
0:05:18 > 0:05:19Can you describe your pillager?
0:05:19 > 0:05:24He was a big, blonde, hairy man with a helmet.
0:05:24 > 0:05:26Oh, great, this shouldn't take long.
0:05:26 > 0:05:28Follow me, madam.
0:05:28 > 0:05:31Can you identify the culprit from this group of suspects?
0:05:31 > 0:05:35You. Oh, it was you.
0:05:35 > 0:05:38Oh, am I so sorry.
0:05:38 > 0:05:40You. What you did to my...
0:05:42 > 0:05:43You!
0:05:44 > 0:05:46It's very confusing, isn't it?
0:05:46 > 0:05:48They all look so similar.
0:05:48 > 0:05:49That is very offensive.
0:05:49 > 0:05:53It was him, he laid waste to the whole east coast of England.
0:05:53 > 0:05:56That is a filthy lie, I am a Norwegian Viking,
0:05:56 > 0:05:58we never pillage English towns.
0:05:58 > 0:06:00- Where were you, then? - Pillaging a Scottish village.- OK.
0:06:00 > 0:06:04It is the Swedes that attack the English cities.
0:06:04 > 0:06:06Who are you calling a Swede?
0:06:06 > 0:06:07I am a Danish Viking.
0:06:07 > 0:06:10Which one of you wears the helmets with the horns,
0:06:10 > 0:06:11the horns coming out?
0:06:11 > 0:06:14That is a stereotype. Yawn.
0:06:14 > 0:06:18I am a Swedish Viking and will never pillage England or Scotland.
0:06:18 > 0:06:20Russia or Constantinople, yes, sure,
0:06:20 > 0:06:22we always pillage these two cities.
0:06:22 > 0:06:25The east. We know which Vikings only who go west.
0:06:25 > 0:06:26The east is just weird.
0:06:26 > 0:06:28You are weird.
0:06:28 > 0:06:29No, you are weird.
0:06:29 > 0:06:31It takes one to know one.
0:06:31 > 0:06:33All right, look, we know you are completely different.
0:06:33 > 0:06:36Yes, but which one of you pillaged this lady's home?
0:06:36 > 0:06:37It was him, the Swedish one.
0:06:37 > 0:06:41No, I'm the Swedish one, here is the Norwegian one.
0:06:41 > 0:06:43How dare you call me Norwegian.
0:06:43 > 0:06:45What's wrong with being Norwegian?
0:06:45 > 0:06:47How about your face?
0:06:47 > 0:06:51- Take that.- Don't flick me.
0:06:53 > 0:06:55Typical Vikings, they're all the same.
0:06:56 > 0:06:59Well, I found the source of the sewer pipe.
0:06:59 > 0:07:01Just as someone flushed.
0:07:01 > 0:07:04I think I will do my exploring at sea next time.
0:07:04 > 0:07:08We rats are great sailors, we've travelled right across the world,
0:07:08 > 0:07:11spreading goodwill and disease wherever we go.
0:07:11 > 0:07:13I've got everything it takes to be a great sailor.
0:07:13 > 0:07:16Courage, a boat, and I once lived in Devon.
0:07:16 > 0:07:20Oh, yes, way before Chris Martin and Tom Daly conquered the world,
0:07:20 > 0:07:24these other sons of Devon were conquering the high seas.
0:07:28 > 0:07:30Pa, I don't want to go to sea.
0:07:30 > 0:07:35Don't be daft, the best navigators in the world come from Devon.
0:07:35 > 0:07:38Just like us. Come on, there are some people I want you to meet.
0:07:41 > 0:07:44Sir Walter Raleigh and Sir Francis Drake.
0:07:44 > 0:07:45It's me.
0:07:47 > 0:07:48John Davies!
0:07:50 > 0:07:52Discovered the Falkland Islands.
0:07:52 > 0:07:56Oh, yes, the place with absolutely no gold and lots of penguins.
0:07:56 > 0:07:58And absolutely no gold.
0:07:58 > 0:07:59Yes, I just said that. All right.
0:07:59 > 0:08:01Oh, them penguins.
0:08:01 > 0:08:03Better than gold, if anything, I reckon.
0:08:05 > 0:08:08Anyway, my son says he doesn't want to go to sea, would you believe it?
0:08:08 > 0:08:11I'm begging your pardon you what now beg your pardon?
0:08:11 > 0:08:14That's the best place for a fine young Devon lad like
0:08:14 > 0:08:17yourself. And we'll show you why. Through a song.
0:08:17 > 0:08:20MUSIC: TO THE TUNE OF I'VE GOT A BRAND NEW COMBINE HARVESTER
0:08:20 > 0:08:22"I'VE GOT A BRAND NEW LAND TO FIND"
0:08:24 > 0:08:26# I sailed right round the globe
0:08:26 > 0:08:27# And saw many a sight
0:08:27 > 0:08:29# Ooh arr, ooh arr
0:08:29 > 0:08:32# I attacked Spanish ports to show Queen Liz's might
0:08:32 > 0:08:34# Ooh arr, ooh arr
0:08:34 > 0:08:38# I sailed right back to England with treasure in the hold,
0:08:38 > 0:08:39#Ooh arr, ooh arr
0:08:39 > 0:08:43# Spanish says I's a pirate but I still got all their gold!
0:08:43 > 0:08:45# Now I've got a brand-new land to find,
0:08:45 > 0:08:47# And you could come with me
0:08:47 > 0:08:49# We're going to make all our fortunes,
0:08:51 > 0:08:52# When we cross the sea
0:08:52 > 0:08:58# You can get a knighthood, and I'll get more wealthy
0:08:58 > 0:08:59# Oh I've got a brand-new land to find,
0:08:59 > 0:09:02# Just don't get dysentery!
0:09:02 > 0:09:04HE BREAKS WIND
0:09:04 > 0:09:08# I explored the New World and set up colonies
0:09:08 > 0:09:09# Ooh arr, ooh arr
0:09:09 > 0:09:12# Brought back potatoes but not the coconut
0:09:12 > 0:09:15- # That was me - # Ooh arr, ooh arr
0:09:15 > 0:09:19# He fought in the Armada and flirted with his Queen
0:09:19 > 0:09:24# Find El Dorado, be the richest man ever seen
0:09:24 > 0:09:26# Now I've got a brand-new land to find
0:09:26 > 0:09:29# So why don't you come with me?
0:09:29 > 0:09:33# We're going to make all our fortunes when we cross the sea
0:09:34 > 0:09:38# You can get a knighthood and I'll get more wealthy
0:09:38 > 0:09:43# But don't forget to bring your sword, cos nothing comes for free
0:09:45 > 0:09:47# I saw the Falklands
0:09:47 > 0:09:49# And discovered some penguins,
0:09:49 > 0:09:51# Ooh arr, ooh arr...#
0:09:53 > 0:09:55Guys? My verse?
0:09:56 > 0:09:59Oh, come on, everyone loves penguins.
0:09:59 > 0:10:01Right?
0:10:01 > 0:10:03Hello, I'm Queen Elizabeth I.
0:10:04 > 0:10:06My courtiers were always trying to impress me.
0:10:07 > 0:10:09Of course they were, I'm the queen.
0:10:09 > 0:10:11I can have their heads chopped off.
0:10:12 > 0:10:17So, what did Sir Francis Drake give me as a small token of his esteem
0:10:17 > 0:10:21when he arrived back from his sailing trip around the world?
0:10:31 > 0:10:35The answer is C, a sack of pounds.
0:10:35 > 0:10:39£160,000 to be precise.
0:10:39 > 0:10:43That's more than half a billion in your modern money.
0:10:44 > 0:10:47I'd still like the pearls and potatoes as well, though.
0:10:47 > 0:10:49Chop chop, I am the queen.
0:10:51 > 0:10:53That's a lot of gold.
0:10:53 > 0:10:55Yes, exploring was often about getting rich,
0:10:55 > 0:10:58and Europeans were obsessed with trying to find the legendary city of
0:10:58 > 0:11:03El Dorado, which was supposedly made entirely of gold.
0:11:03 > 0:11:06Spanish explorers searched deep into the rainforests of South America to
0:11:06 > 0:11:09find it, attacking us locals as they went.
0:11:09 > 0:11:12But we had a pretty clever way of getting rid of them.
0:11:16 > 0:11:19- Sorry, I'm late, babes.- It's all right, it's quiet.
0:11:19 > 0:11:21Only a couple through so far.
0:11:21 > 0:11:25Hold on, here comes another lot.
0:11:25 > 0:11:27The city of gold, Gonzalo.
0:11:29 > 0:11:32I'm beginning to doubt that they even exist, to be honest.
0:11:32 > 0:11:34But cities of solid gold, compadre,
0:11:34 > 0:11:36why would the locals make that up?
0:11:36 > 0:11:39I don't know, but either way,
0:11:39 > 0:11:40I think that we should call off the search
0:11:40 > 0:11:42and just burn down the villages and
0:11:42 > 0:11:44steal all their stuff, like normal, please.
0:11:44 > 0:11:47Greetings, godlike warriors.
0:11:47 > 0:11:51Seek you the fabulous cities of gold that shine like the sun?
0:11:51 > 0:11:54All right, don't overcook it.
0:11:54 > 0:11:58Si, I, Gonzalo Pizarro, seek the legendary city of El Dorado.
0:11:58 > 0:12:00- I do that as well.- He does too.
0:12:00 > 0:12:03It's down that path away from our village,
0:12:03 > 0:12:08and then turn you left and walk for about a week and then you climb over
0:12:08 > 0:12:11the mountain, swim through the malaria infested water.
0:12:11 > 0:12:14Don't worry about the name. And then it's just up there on the right.
0:12:14 > 0:12:16I'm going to be the richest man in Spain.
0:12:21 > 0:12:24Directions to the crocodile breeding ground.
0:12:24 > 0:12:25Nice touch.
0:12:25 > 0:12:28- Incoming.- Look, natives.
0:12:28 > 0:12:30Let us torture them until they tell us where it is.
0:12:30 > 0:12:33No need, mighty masters.
0:12:33 > 0:12:35For legend of your strength and heroism has already reached us
0:12:35 > 0:12:38and we are so afraid.
0:12:38 > 0:12:40Excellent. Ponce de Leon may be hunting for the
0:12:40 > 0:12:42fountain of youth in the north,
0:12:42 > 0:12:46like an idiota, but we, we hunt a city made entirely of gold.
0:12:46 > 0:12:48Which is way more believable.
0:12:48 > 0:12:51Right, so, it's 100 miles that way, turn right,
0:12:51 > 0:12:54look for a tree and Bob's your poncho.
0:12:54 > 0:12:55What kind of a tree?
0:12:55 > 0:12:58It's got a brown trunk and green leaves, can't miss it.
0:12:58 > 0:13:00Glory awaits. Gracias.
0:13:02 > 0:13:05You sent us to the capital of crocodile.
0:13:05 > 0:13:07You said it was that way and then right.
0:13:07 > 0:13:11No, it was a left.
0:13:11 > 0:13:14We've got to go unless we're never going to find it.
0:13:14 > 0:13:15Unless...
0:13:18 > 0:13:21You aren't just giving us the run-around to get rid of us?
0:13:21 > 0:13:23No.
0:13:23 > 0:13:26The gold city, that way.
0:13:26 > 0:13:30- Really?- There is also a tribe of Amazonian river women who really
0:13:30 > 0:13:33- like kissing.- I like kissing too.
0:13:33 > 0:13:35Come on, Gonzalo. Which way from the path?
0:13:35 > 0:13:38- Right.- Left. - Left.- Right.
0:13:38 > 0:13:39Left, then right.
0:13:39 > 0:13:41Seems simple enough.
0:13:41 > 0:13:43Let's go.
0:13:45 > 0:13:49It is true, people really do think the locals made up the stories about
0:13:49 > 0:13:52the cities of gold just so that explorers
0:13:52 > 0:13:56would get lost in the jungle and leave them alone.
0:13:56 > 0:13:58Honestly, who would believe there could be a city
0:13:58 > 0:14:00made entirely of gold?
0:14:01 > 0:14:02You'd have to be an idiot.
0:14:02 > 0:14:06But a city made of cheese is totally believable.
0:14:06 > 0:14:11Yes, my search for the ancient realm of El Double Gloucester
0:14:11 > 0:14:12starts today.
0:14:12 > 0:14:16And I know one person who won't be asking for directions.
0:14:16 > 0:14:17Christopher Columbus.
0:14:19 > 0:14:22It's a new term, and head teacher Hannah Lawrence has just two weeks
0:14:22 > 0:14:25to turn around the school, whose last Ofsted rating was OMG,
0:14:25 > 0:14:28someone should flatten this place and build a car park.
0:14:28 > 0:14:30Welcome to Historical Educating.
0:14:30 > 0:14:33I want the children to actually connect with the subject,
0:14:33 > 0:14:36so starting with Key stage two geography,
0:14:36 > 0:14:40I'm bringing in a teacher who really knows his subject first hand.
0:14:40 > 0:14:42Class 7F's new teacher is Christopher Columbus.
0:14:42 > 0:14:47Ciao bambini, yes, it is I, the famous Christopher Columbus.
0:14:47 > 0:14:48Wrong way, sir.
0:14:51 > 0:14:53You are sitting in the wrong place.
0:14:53 > 0:14:55My geographical calculations clearly show...
0:14:55 > 0:14:57You should be over here.
0:14:57 > 0:15:01OK, Mr Columbus doesn't have classroom experience,
0:15:01 > 0:15:02or a sense of direction,
0:15:02 > 0:15:05but he discovered America for goodness' sake.
0:15:05 > 0:15:07The kids can look up to him and say, "Hey,
0:15:07 > 0:15:10"maybe one day I can discover a continental landmass too."
0:15:10 > 0:15:15Who can tell me where you get to if you set out from Spain and
0:15:15 > 0:15:17cross the mighty ocean?
0:15:17 > 0:15:19- America, sir.- "America, sir."
0:15:19 > 0:15:21No, no, never heard of it.
0:15:21 > 0:15:23It goes Spain,
0:15:23 > 0:15:28sea monsters, sea dragons, Japan.
0:15:28 > 0:15:30That's not Japan, sir.
0:15:30 > 0:15:31That's Cuba.
0:15:32 > 0:15:33Cuba.
0:15:34 > 0:15:36Mexico, Latin America.
0:15:36 > 0:15:40No, no, this globe is all completely wrong.
0:15:40 > 0:15:42Luckily I brought my own.
0:15:42 > 0:15:45Sir, that looks a lot like a pear.
0:15:45 > 0:15:47Yes, just like the Earth itself.
0:15:47 > 0:15:49Which is why when I went to Japan,
0:15:49 > 0:15:50I had to sail uphill.
0:15:52 > 0:15:57It is only 23 minutes into the new term and Columbus is called into the
0:15:57 > 0:15:58head teacher's office.
0:15:59 > 0:16:01Peculiar, there's no-one here.
0:16:01 > 0:16:02I'm over here.
0:16:03 > 0:16:05Oh. Well, according to my calculations,
0:16:05 > 0:16:07you should not be there, you should...
0:16:07 > 0:16:10Apparently your calculations also say that the world is
0:16:10 > 0:16:13pear-shaped and there's no such place as America.
0:16:13 > 0:16:15America, again.
0:16:15 > 0:16:18Look, there's no such place.
0:16:18 > 0:16:21OK, I'll tell you what's gone pear shaped, this job. You're fired.
0:16:21 > 0:16:23Well, it's too late because I quit.
0:16:23 > 0:16:25No, because I just fired you.
0:16:25 > 0:16:26I can't hear what you're saying.
0:16:26 > 0:16:28I am walking out of here already, so...
0:16:31 > 0:16:32That's a cupboard.
0:16:32 > 0:16:33Not according to my calculations.
0:16:35 > 0:16:38These great explorers brought back boats
0:16:38 > 0:16:43full of untold wealth and exotic things. It wasn't just the jewels
0:16:43 > 0:16:45people got excited about.
0:16:45 > 0:16:46Do you think it suits me?
0:16:47 > 0:16:52Hi, world. I'm here with my BFFs Charlotte and Emily,
0:16:52 > 0:16:56and we've come to my uncle's house today because I heard a rumour that
0:16:57 > 0:17:00one of them is here.
0:17:04 > 0:17:07OMG, they are so lush.
0:17:07 > 0:17:11I'm so excited, I have never seen one in real life.
0:17:11 > 0:17:14Harriet is going to be well jel.
0:17:16 > 0:17:17I hope I don't say something stupid.
0:17:23 > 0:17:26I literally cannot believe it.
0:17:26 > 0:17:29I love the hair so much.
0:17:29 > 0:17:31It is so amazing.
0:17:34 > 0:17:38A pineapple! A pineapple!
0:17:40 > 0:17:44My uncle rented it so he could show it off at his party this weekend.
0:17:44 > 0:17:47We've never had one in Britain before!
0:17:51 > 0:17:52Charlotte.
0:17:57 > 0:18:00I cannot believe the pineapple has split up.
0:18:01 > 0:18:05This is the worst day of my life.
0:18:05 > 0:18:08This is so sad.
0:18:08 > 0:18:13Oh, it's so good.
0:18:13 > 0:18:15It's what he would have wanted.
0:18:17 > 0:18:21It wasn't just the warm places that the explorers braved.
0:18:21 > 0:18:25Once the oceans and continents had been conquered,
0:18:25 > 0:18:30they headed for the icy lands of the North and South Pole.
0:18:30 > 0:18:33It's no wonder that when Ernest Shackleton
0:18:33 > 0:18:35tried to cross the Antarctic by ship
0:18:35 > 0:18:39for the first time, things didn't go entirely to plan.
0:18:41 > 0:18:44Men, our mission to cross the Antarctic is in crisis.
0:18:44 > 0:18:48Our ship is now sinking and we are stuck here on the ice.
0:18:48 > 0:18:53I have decided, as leader, that we should go for help.
0:18:53 > 0:18:55It is a perilous journey and we may not survive,
0:18:55 > 0:18:58but just thinking of the hunger and hardships that you will be
0:18:58 > 0:19:03no doubt facing will spur us on in the trials ahead, so...
0:19:03 > 0:19:06- Bye-bye.- Bye. God speed.
0:19:06 > 0:19:09Shut the door, shut the door, shut the door.
0:19:13 > 0:19:17Once alone on the ice, the despair is overwhelming.
0:19:20 > 0:19:22Still, who's up for a game of football?
0:19:22 > 0:19:23Oh, me, please.
0:19:23 > 0:19:24Do we have a football?
0:19:24 > 0:19:26We could make one out of ice.
0:19:27 > 0:19:28Good plan.
0:19:32 > 0:19:35Keep rowing, lads, we should be out of this freezing,
0:19:35 > 0:19:38cold sea in about three weeks.
0:19:38 > 0:19:40It is only 800 miles,
0:19:40 > 0:19:46just think of the poor wretches we've left behind and row.
0:19:46 > 0:19:47Penguin meat, anyone?
0:19:49 > 0:19:50Is there any more dog?
0:19:50 > 0:19:52That finished Friday last week.
0:19:52 > 0:19:54Sausage dog.
0:19:54 > 0:19:57How about a surprise slushy?
0:19:57 > 0:19:59Oh, what's the surprise?
0:19:59 > 0:20:00I've made it yellow.
0:20:00 > 0:20:03Snow sprinkles?
0:20:07 > 0:20:09We've finally made it to South Georgia.
0:20:12 > 0:20:16Unfortunately we are on the wrong side of the wretched island.
0:20:16 > 0:20:19We are going to have to climb over the mountain to get to the port.
0:20:19 > 0:20:22We'll be risking our lives, but think of the poor men
0:20:22 > 0:20:25we've left behind. It must be a living hell.
0:20:27 > 0:20:29All right.
0:20:29 > 0:20:31I heard there are nibbles.
0:20:31 > 0:20:36Yes, I can offer you frost bite, and hope you like penguin.
0:20:39 > 0:20:40Please, I am desperate,
0:20:40 > 0:20:43I have travelled all across South America and the South Atlantic
0:20:43 > 0:20:45looking for a boat to rescue my men.
0:20:45 > 0:20:49Please, if we do not leave now, there'll be none left alive to save.
0:20:56 > 0:20:57We are back.
0:20:57 > 0:21:00- Shacklesby. - Shackleton.
0:21:00 > 0:21:02Right, sorry, sir, it's been a while.
0:21:02 > 0:21:04We've come back to rescue you.
0:21:06 > 0:21:09Thank goodness you are here, we are a man short for the footy.
0:21:09 > 0:21:12We're travelled thousands of miles to rescue you and take you back to
0:21:12 > 0:21:14- civilisation.- Excellent.
0:21:14 > 0:21:17I'm sick of penguin. And ice football isn't great for the toes.
0:21:17 > 0:21:21Plus, a sea lion has made off with my banjo.
0:21:21 > 0:21:23Then we've got here just in time.
0:21:23 > 0:21:25- Come on.- Oh, remember, there is a war on.
0:21:25 > 0:21:27We can go home but as soon as we go back,
0:21:27 > 0:21:29we all have to head off and fight in the trenches.
0:21:29 > 0:21:30Right, we are staying.
0:21:32 > 0:21:33Where is that sea lion with my banjo?
0:21:40 > 0:21:41I love this one.
0:21:42 > 0:21:43Trapped in a snowstorm
0:21:44 > 0:21:47with no way out,
0:21:47 > 0:21:50Arctic explorer Peter Freuchen will take
0:21:50 > 0:21:53human ingenuity to the limit and beyond.
0:21:53 > 0:21:57I could just squeeze out a poo.
0:21:57 > 0:22:02I could make a frozen chisel and dig my way to freedom.
0:22:02 > 0:22:04It's a true story, it's...
0:22:04 > 0:22:06A poo story.
0:22:06 > 0:22:09It will warm your heart and open your bottom.
0:22:09 > 0:22:11MUSIC: TO THE TUNE OF LET IT GO
0:22:11 > 0:22:14# Let it go, let it go,
0:22:14 > 0:22:20# Can't hold it in anymore, let it go,
0:22:20 > 0:22:25# Let it go, let it curl up on the floor,
0:22:25 > 0:22:26PARP
0:22:26 > 0:22:30# I've been trapped for several hours underneath all this snow
0:22:30 > 0:22:34# And maybe it's the frostbite talking and the lack of air too
0:22:34 > 0:22:35# Say goodbye
0:22:35 > 0:22:41# Say goodbye to the cold and the ice
0:22:41 > 0:22:46# We don't have to stay here anymore
0:22:46 > 0:22:50# I'm going to make a door, I'm going to make a door
0:22:50 > 0:22:51- #With you - # With me
0:22:51 > 0:22:53- # With poo - # That's me
0:22:53 > 0:22:55# With poo, I'm going to make a door. #
0:22:58 > 0:23:00Can I say something crazy?
0:23:00 > 0:23:02Will you marry me?
0:23:02 > 0:23:05Can I say something even crazier?
0:23:05 > 0:23:07You are talking to a poo.
0:23:07 > 0:23:10Frozen Freuchen, coming soon.
0:23:10 > 0:23:12But I'd probably give it five minutes, if I were you.
0:23:14 > 0:23:19Hi, I'm the famous explorer Ernest Shackleton and I simply
0:23:19 > 0:23:21couldn't have survived without dogs.
0:23:22 > 0:23:26Out there in the snowy wastes of Antarctica, dogs pulled our sleds,
0:23:26 > 0:23:28they gave us warmth at night.
0:23:28 > 0:23:30Above all, they gave us friendship.
0:23:31 > 0:23:35That's why it was so hard to eat them, but we were...
0:23:35 > 0:23:37- Cut.- I'm standing in the right place, aren't I?
0:23:37 > 0:23:38Sorry, did you say you ate your dog?
0:23:38 > 0:23:40- Oh, yes.- That is totally inappropriate.
0:23:40 > 0:23:43This is The Historical Dogs Appreciation Society.
0:23:43 > 0:23:45Can you get him out of here? Get me someone else, please.
0:23:45 > 0:23:50I do appreciate, they were lovely, a bit of lemon and black pepper.
0:23:50 > 0:23:51Hi, I'm Lewis.
0:23:51 > 0:23:56- And I'm Clark.- We explored Louisiana and the vast wilderness of early
0:23:56 > 0:23:5919th-century America for nearly two years.
0:23:59 > 0:24:00We faced a lot of hardships,
0:24:00 > 0:24:03and there were times when we thought we couldn't go on.
0:24:03 > 0:24:06But if there's one thing that held us together, it was our dogs.
0:24:06 > 0:24:10They defended us, kept our spirits high and when we were hungry,
0:24:10 > 0:24:12they were totally, utterly delicious.
0:24:12 > 0:24:15- Cut!- I wouldn't have said delicious.
0:24:15 > 0:24:16I mean, it was OK.
0:24:16 > 0:24:19You ate your own dogs. It is not OK.
0:24:19 > 0:24:20Is it too much to ask to get me someone
0:24:20 > 0:24:22who doesn't eat dogs, please?
0:24:22 > 0:24:23Am I talking to myself?
0:24:23 > 0:24:24She's stressed out.
0:24:26 > 0:24:28OK. Captain Cook, just to confirm...
0:24:28 > 0:24:32Yes, yes, I confirm that on my historic voyage to Australia I did
0:24:32 > 0:24:34not and have never eaten my own dog.
0:24:34 > 0:24:37OK. And action.
0:24:38 > 0:24:40I'm Captain James Cook...
0:24:40 > 0:24:43No, I tell you a lie, we did eat the ones they gave to us when we arrived
0:24:43 > 0:24:47at Hawaii. We served them up as a banquet, almost as nice as lamb.
0:24:47 > 0:24:49Cut!
0:24:49 > 0:24:51What is wrong with you people?
0:24:51 > 0:24:53We were starving hungry.
0:24:53 > 0:24:55You do things you regret when you're desperate.
0:24:55 > 0:24:57I didn't want to be rude.
0:24:57 > 0:24:59- What about cats? - Oh, I've never had cat.
0:24:59 > 0:25:01Can you get them out of here, please?
0:25:02 > 0:25:05Humankind's curiosity next turned to the stars,
0:25:05 > 0:25:08and one of the bravest explorers of all was the astronaut Alan Shepard,
0:25:08 > 0:25:11the first American to travel into space.
0:25:11 > 0:25:15I just hope he didn't forget to do something before he set off.
0:25:16 > 0:25:18Readouts are at 100% efficiency.
0:25:18 > 0:25:21The sensors in the space suit are all working.
0:25:21 > 0:25:24- You guys.- We are going to learn so much about how the human body copes
0:25:24 > 0:25:27- in outer space.- Houston, we have a problem. Sorry, guys,
0:25:27 > 0:25:29I'm going to have to interrupt you here.
0:25:29 > 0:25:31Hang on, Alan, won't be long now.
0:25:31 > 0:25:34Now, all the electrodes are still attached to his body, correct?
0:25:34 > 0:25:37When we first talked about this whole going into space caboodle,
0:25:37 > 0:25:40we said it was going to take 15 minutes, so...
0:25:40 > 0:25:43I've got a bit of a situation in the bladder department.
0:25:43 > 0:25:46Yes, Alan, that's right, we had to delay because of the weather,
0:25:46 > 0:25:49but we should be ready to launch soon. So, just sit tight.
0:25:49 > 0:25:52Sit tight, that is great advice, thank you, Phil, but you see,
0:25:52 > 0:25:54the thing is, I didn't think it would take this long.
0:25:54 > 0:25:57So I didn't go.
0:25:57 > 0:25:59Sorry, go, go where?
0:25:59 > 0:26:02To the little astronaut's room.
0:26:02 > 0:26:03You want to go to the bathroom?
0:26:03 > 0:26:06I really, really, really need the toilet.
0:26:06 > 0:26:09I mean, heavens to Betsy, I've been in here for five hours.
0:26:09 > 0:26:12Look, we can't stop the mission now, Alan, just think of something.
0:26:12 > 0:26:14- You're an astronaut.- Final checks.
0:26:17 > 0:26:18Six, five...
0:26:18 > 0:26:20No. What's going on?
0:26:20 > 0:26:23- Mission aborted.- The suit's sensors are short circuiting.
0:26:23 > 0:26:26Alan, I don't how to tell you this, but we've had a malfunction,
0:26:26 > 0:26:28so we might have to abort.
0:26:31 > 0:26:33Alan, did you go pee pee?
0:26:33 > 0:26:35It's OK, you guys,
0:26:35 > 0:26:37I'm ready for take-off.
0:26:38 > 0:26:42Mr Shepherd and Russian Yuri Gagarin
0:26:42 > 0:26:44were the first men in space.
0:26:44 > 0:26:47But I've discovered something that makes me feel better about not
0:26:47 > 0:26:51finding El Double Gloucester, because two whole years before,
0:26:51 > 0:26:54a rat called Hector got there first in a French rocket.
0:26:54 > 0:26:58And that is 100% accu-rat.
0:26:58 > 0:27:02Of course, exploring wasn't just about brave men and brave rats,
0:27:02 > 0:27:04many female explorers have pushed
0:27:04 > 0:27:07the boundaries of human discovery, too.
0:27:07 > 0:27:09They just don't make such a song and dance about it.
0:27:09 > 0:27:11Well, until now.
0:27:16 > 0:27:17MUSIC: TO THE TUNE OF KATY PERRY'S ROAR
0:27:17 > 0:27:20# Girls were told don't roam got to stay at home
0:27:20 > 0:27:23# Until the reign of Queen Victoria
0:27:23 > 0:27:26# The establishment said women are not meant
0:27:26 > 0:27:28# To adventure and explore ya
0:27:28 > 0:27:31# Gertrude Bell said, "Poo, I can claim this too"
0:27:31 > 0:27:33# Spoke Arabic, French and Persian,
0:27:33 > 0:27:36# Good as any chaps working out new maps
0:27:36 > 0:27:38# On each Middle East excursion
0:27:38 > 0:27:41# Nellie Bly made it round the world
0:27:41 > 0:27:42No flights!
0:27:42 > 0:27:44# Isabella Bird reached the rocky heights
0:27:44 > 0:27:47# Lily Bristow kept going until she dropped
0:27:47 > 0:27:50# So many mountaineers reach the top
0:27:50 > 0:27:52# First lady to climb the Eiger
0:27:52 > 0:27:57# Lucy Walker, mountaineer
0:27:57 > 0:28:00# Female pioneer
0:28:00 > 0:28:03# One of the great explorers
0:28:03 > 0:28:06#Who travelled further than before
0:28:06 > 0:28:10# Ascended the Matterhorn
0:28:10 > 0:28:15# Oh, see me explore
0:28:15 > 0:28:17# Having reached their peak, women set to seek
0:28:17 > 0:28:20# Bigger thrills and more higher highs
0:28:20 > 0:28:23# Each aeroplane Jane had revered to gain
0:28:23 > 0:28:26# They could match their men in the skies
0:28:26 > 0:28:27# Let's take for a start
0:28:27 > 0:28:28# Amelia Earhart
0:28:28 > 0:28:31# Wanted to be more romantic
0:28:31 > 0:28:34# In a flying burst she will man
0:28:34 > 0:28:36# The first solo flight across Atlantic
0:28:36 > 0:28:39# Amy Johnson's a world star, no avoiding
0:28:39 > 0:28:41# Not bad for a flyer who started in Croydon!
0:28:42 > 0:28:45# They had a lust for adventure, danger
0:28:45 > 0:28:51# First woman in space, Valentina Tereshkova
0:28:51 > 0:28:55# And we're going to explore
0:28:55 > 0:28:58# Mountains, skies and outer space
0:28:58 > 0:29:00# There's simply no place
0:29:01 > 0:29:05# Off-limits any more
0:29:05 > 0:29:07# Oh-oh-oh-oh
0:29:07 > 0:29:09# See us explore. #