Heroic Heroes & Villainous Villains

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0:00:02 > 0:00:03# Terrible Tudors, gorgeous Georgians

0:00:03 > 0:00:04# Slimy Stuarts, vile Victorians

0:00:04 > 0:00:07# Woeful wars, ferocious fights Dingy castles, daring knights

0:00:07 > 0:00:09# Horrors that defy description, Cut-throat Celts, awful Egyptians

0:00:09 > 0:00:12# Vicious Vikings, cruel crimes, Punishment from ancient times

0:00:12 > 0:00:13# Romans, rotten, rank and ruthless

0:00:13 > 0:00:15# Cavemen, savage, fierce and toothless

0:00:15 > 0:00:18# Groovy Greeks, brainy sages Mean and measly Middle Ages

0:00:18 > 0:00:20# Gory stories, we do that

0:00:20 > 0:00:23# And your host, a talking rat

0:00:23 > 0:00:26# The past is no longer a mystery

0:00:26 > 0:00:27# Welcome to...

0:00:27 > 0:00:32# Horrible Histories. #

0:00:32 > 0:00:33Horrible Histories presents...

0:00:38 > 0:00:41Heroes and villains. In America, we've got plenty of both

0:00:41 > 0:00:45and one of the best-known villains of the 20th century was the gangster

0:00:45 > 0:00:46Al Capone.

0:00:46 > 0:00:47Ah!

0:00:47 > 0:00:51When alcohol was banned under a new law called prohibition,

0:00:51 > 0:00:53Al Capone knew just what to do.

0:00:53 > 0:00:56Sell it illegally and make stacks of cash.

0:00:56 > 0:00:59With a little bit of violence and bribery along the way.

0:01:00 > 0:01:02People of America,

0:01:02 > 0:01:04for too long our country

0:01:04 > 0:01:07has been drowning under a sea of wicked alcohol.

0:01:07 > 0:01:12So today, our Government, with support from the Church,

0:01:12 > 0:01:15has passed the Volstead Act.

0:01:15 > 0:01:18Welcome to prohibition!

0:01:18 > 0:01:19APPLAUSE

0:01:20 > 0:01:21No alcohol?

0:01:21 > 0:01:24Dream on, buddy. See, my name is Al Capone,

0:01:24 > 0:01:27AKA the toughest gangster in all Chicago and, excuse me,

0:01:27 > 0:01:30but I got a better idea.

0:01:30 > 0:01:32MUSIC IN THE STYLE OF UPTOWN FUNK by Bruno Mars

0:01:33 > 0:01:37# Government introduce alcohol prohibition

0:01:37 > 0:01:41# So up in Chicago I began a grand crime mission

0:01:41 > 0:01:45# Stealing goods in the hood, my business on the rise

0:01:45 > 0:01:50# Illegal drink, avoid the clink because I'm organised

0:01:50 > 0:01:51- # They said - # You're bad!

0:01:51 > 0:01:54# But I said strictly business

0:01:54 > 0:01:56- # They claimed - # You robbed!

0:01:56 > 0:01:58# But my good friends bear witness

0:01:58 > 0:01:59# All pure

0:01:59 > 0:02:02# With innocent names like Golf Bag, Camel and Teats

0:02:02 > 0:02:04# Killer, Enforcer, Machine Gun

0:02:04 > 0:02:07# Nicer guys you couldn't hope to meet

0:02:07 > 0:02:09# Local laws I abide

0:02:09 > 0:02:11# Do as told by police tribes

0:02:11 > 0:02:13# Especially since they take my bribes

0:02:13 > 0:02:15# Cos Al Capone gonna sell it to you

0:02:15 > 0:02:17# Downtown punk gonna flog it to you

0:02:17 > 0:02:19# Gangster Al gonna flog you too

0:02:19 > 0:02:21# Saturday night and daytime too

0:02:21 > 0:02:23# Want to buy a nice watch?

0:02:23 > 0:02:25# Downtown threat # That's me

0:02:25 > 0:02:27# In my debt you'll be

0:02:27 > 0:02:29# Downtown threat # That's me

0:02:29 > 0:02:31# In my debt you'll be

0:02:31 > 0:02:34# The law didn't last cos the government lost their bunk

0:02:34 > 0:02:36# They drowned in drink, but I kept my head

0:02:36 > 0:02:38# Sold milk instead

0:02:38 > 0:02:40# Full throttle, get me in the pink

0:02:40 > 0:02:44# When the milk went off it made a stink, so did I, and my desire

0:02:44 > 0:02:46# Was to force them to put on a sell-by date

0:02:46 > 0:02:48# My friends would help them expire

0:02:48 > 0:02:52# Tough guy scar on my face, sent to jail on an income tax case

0:02:52 > 0:02:54# History secures my final place

0:02:54 > 0:02:56# As the man who brought you the sell-by date

0:02:56 > 0:02:58# Can't believe it's gone off. #

0:03:01 > 0:03:04Al Capone may have helped introduce the sell-by date,

0:03:04 > 0:03:06but he was one scary guy.

0:03:07 > 0:03:10Mind you, some people are scared of rats too.

0:03:10 > 0:03:12They think we're villains.

0:03:12 > 0:03:13I don't mind really.

0:03:13 > 0:03:16Some historical villains are more interesting than the heroes.

0:03:16 > 0:03:19In fact, I'm not even sure which I prefer.

0:03:19 > 0:03:22It's the villains, of course, pal.

0:03:22 > 0:03:26We got all the best looks and all the best lines.

0:03:26 > 0:03:28Don't listen, my son.

0:03:28 > 0:03:31'Tis heroes you prefer.

0:03:31 > 0:03:34Our goodness has made the world a better place.

0:03:34 > 0:03:37Oh, man, it's difficult to decide.

0:03:37 > 0:03:41Maybe I should check out some heroes myself first.

0:03:41 > 0:03:45Now, these guys trained to be astronauts at NASA in America

0:03:45 > 0:03:48and their next mission will be one that changed the world.

0:03:48 > 0:03:50How inspiring!

0:03:50 > 0:03:52How boring!

0:03:52 > 0:03:55Oh, for goodness' sake, be quiet, the pair of you!

0:03:58 > 0:04:00- Neil Armstrong.- Yes, sir.

0:04:00 > 0:04:01- Michael Collins.- Present, sir.

0:04:01 > 0:04:04- Buzz Aldrin.- Sir, yes, sir, I'm here, sir.

0:04:04 > 0:04:07Gentlemen, we are sending you...

0:04:09 > 0:04:10..to the moon.

0:04:10 > 0:04:12- Yes!- Awesome!

0:04:13 > 0:04:16We won't let you down, sir. Just one question.

0:04:16 > 0:04:19- How do we get there? - Well, it's pretty straightforward.

0:04:19 > 0:04:22In a nutshell, we put you in the tip of a huge rocket,

0:04:22 > 0:04:24create a massive explosion at the bottom of the rocket

0:04:24 > 0:04:26and point you at the moon.

0:04:27 > 0:04:30Yeah, as illustration...

0:04:33 > 0:04:35Well, you get the...

0:04:35 > 0:04:37CAT YOWLS Aah!

0:04:37 > 0:04:39Gentlemen, let me set your minds at rest

0:04:39 > 0:04:41by explaining how this thing works.

0:04:43 > 0:04:48First we ignite 4.7 million pounds of rocket fuel.

0:04:48 > 0:04:50That is a lot of rocket fuel.

0:04:50 > 0:04:53That gets you going at over 6,000 mph.

0:04:53 > 0:04:54Whoargh...

0:04:54 > 0:04:56At that point,

0:04:56 > 0:04:58the bottom of the rocket falls off.

0:04:58 > 0:05:00Wait, a bit falls off?

0:05:00 > 0:05:03That gets you going at over 15,000 mph.

0:05:03 > 0:05:07But first, another bit of the rocket falls off.

0:05:07 > 0:05:08Oh, no,

0:05:08 > 0:05:11just that bit.

0:05:11 > 0:05:13You don't want this bit to fall off.

0:05:13 > 0:05:15You guys would be... Anyway, there you go.

0:05:15 > 0:05:18Once you fly around the Earth one time,

0:05:18 > 0:05:21you accelerate to 25,000 mph...

0:05:21 > 0:05:22Oh, no!

0:05:22 > 0:05:23..to escape the orbit of the Earth.

0:05:23 > 0:05:25I am so hot.

0:05:25 > 0:05:28Then... Anyone?

0:05:28 > 0:05:31- A bit falls off? - Hey, give that man a Twinkie!

0:05:31 > 0:05:33- I don't want a Twinkie.- Oh, no...

0:05:34 > 0:05:37Then, at that point, you detach the command module,

0:05:37 > 0:05:39rotate it 180 degrees,

0:05:39 > 0:05:42and connect it to the lunar module...

0:05:42 > 0:05:43- Are you writing this down?- No.

0:05:43 > 0:05:46..and then you fly around the moon 30 times.

0:05:46 > 0:05:48No, please. I'm going to be sick.

0:05:50 > 0:05:51I am not OK with this.

0:05:52 > 0:05:54And then, Buzz and Neil,

0:05:54 > 0:05:58you detach the lunar module and land...

0:05:58 > 0:05:59and land on the surface of the moon.

0:06:01 > 0:06:03Easy! So...

0:06:04 > 0:06:05..any questions?

0:06:05 > 0:06:07Yes, sir, I have a question...

0:06:09 > 0:06:13Those guys really did land on the moon in 1969,

0:06:13 > 0:06:15braving outer space in a rocket

0:06:15 > 0:06:19that had less technology than a modern smartphone.

0:06:19 > 0:06:22100% heroes.

0:06:22 > 0:06:24100% bozos.

0:06:24 > 0:06:27All heroes are dull.

0:06:27 > 0:06:29Well, that can't be true.

0:06:29 > 0:06:32What about the ancient Egyptian Pharaoh Ramesses?

0:06:32 > 0:06:33Look at everything he achieved.

0:06:33 > 0:06:37He was such a hero, they erected statues of him everywhere.

0:06:37 > 0:06:39Who do you think ordered those statues?

0:06:40 > 0:06:42Ah.

0:06:42 > 0:06:47Today, I'm in ancient Egypt to meet a pharaoh

0:06:47 > 0:06:51who likes to dream - and build - big.

0:06:51 > 0:06:54Welcome to Historical Grand Designs.

0:06:57 > 0:06:58Ramesses and his wife Nefertari

0:06:58 > 0:07:00have won many battles and built incredible

0:07:00 > 0:07:02cities and monuments,

0:07:02 > 0:07:05none more so than the one they are planning right now.

0:07:05 > 0:07:08Ramesses II, great to meet you.

0:07:08 > 0:07:09Yeah, it is great to meet me.

0:07:10 > 0:07:14Welcome to the mansion of the millions of years

0:07:14 > 0:07:16of Usermaatre Setepenre

0:07:16 > 0:07:19which joined with Thebes in the Domain of Amun.

0:07:19 > 0:07:22We're going to call it the Ramesseum for short. My idea.

0:07:22 > 0:07:24Yes, it's real gold.

0:07:24 > 0:07:25Silly question,

0:07:25 > 0:07:27but where on earth are you guys going to sleep?

0:07:27 > 0:07:29Oh, no, no, no wrong end of the stick, big guy.

0:07:29 > 0:07:30No, we're not going to live here.

0:07:30 > 0:07:34I'm building this place so people can worship me after I'm dead.

0:07:34 > 0:07:37Worship US. Worship us, darling.

0:07:37 > 0:07:38You did promise.

0:07:40 > 0:07:42And what's going to go over there?

0:07:42 > 0:07:44Yeah, I'm thinking a massive statue of me

0:07:44 > 0:07:46with my name carved in extra deep

0:07:46 > 0:07:48so that no future pharaohs can come along

0:07:48 > 0:07:51and chip it off and pretend it's them, like I do.

0:07:53 > 0:07:55And what about over there? What's going there?

0:07:55 > 0:07:57I'm thinking another massive statue of me.

0:07:58 > 0:08:01What about over there? Another massive statue of you?

0:08:01 > 0:08:04- No, no.- A statue of me?

0:08:04 > 0:08:07Two statues of me. Big fellas. Whoa!

0:08:10 > 0:08:11OK, all right.

0:08:11 > 0:08:15In fact, Ramesses plans to fill the entire Ramesseum

0:08:15 > 0:08:17with statues of himself.

0:08:17 > 0:08:22I just wonder if it might be a tiny bit statue-heavy?

0:08:24 > 0:08:26Ramesses and Nefertari, it's been a lot of work.

0:08:26 > 0:08:28Has it been worth it?

0:08:28 > 0:08:31I don't know - ask the slaves.

0:08:31 > 0:08:32I'm joking.

0:08:32 > 0:08:35Please don't speak to the slaves.

0:08:35 > 0:08:36So there you have it.

0:08:36 > 0:08:40What better legacy could Ramesses leave behind than a temple full to

0:08:40 > 0:08:42the brim with big...

0:08:42 > 0:08:45- Headed...- ..statues?

0:08:45 > 0:08:46Of me.

0:08:48 > 0:08:49I kind of do the sign-offs, but...

0:08:51 > 0:08:55Hello, supreme pharaoh Cleopatra here.

0:08:55 > 0:09:00Now, being a leader is hard work and sometimes you have to be

0:09:00 > 0:09:02pretty ruthless to keep hold of your throne.

0:09:02 > 0:09:05And that includes being strict with your family.

0:09:05 > 0:09:08I had four brothers and sisters in total,

0:09:08 > 0:09:12but how many of them met a sticky end because of me?

0:09:12 > 0:09:14Was it...

0:09:19 > 0:09:20The answer is...

0:09:23 > 0:09:27My brother, Ptolemy the 13th, died fighting me in battle.

0:09:27 > 0:09:30My other brother, Ptolemy the 14th, was poisoned

0:09:30 > 0:09:33and my sister, Arsinoe, was assassinated.

0:09:33 > 0:09:36Well, if they will get in my way, what do they expect?

0:09:36 > 0:09:38Aren't I awful?

0:09:39 > 0:09:42Murdering your brothers and sisters - that's terrible.

0:09:42 > 0:09:46It just goes to show it's not always easy to spot

0:09:46 > 0:09:48who is a villain and who is a hero.

0:09:48 > 0:09:51We Greeks even had a villain with "hero" in his name.

0:09:52 > 0:09:57People of Ephesus, our city has suffered a terrible crime.

0:09:57 > 0:10:01The Temple of Artemis, one of the seven wonders of the world,

0:10:01 > 0:10:05has been burned to the ground by the villain, Herostratus.

0:10:05 > 0:10:06ALL: Oh, no.

0:10:06 > 0:10:09He committed the crime for one reason only.

0:10:09 > 0:10:11To make himself famous.

0:10:12 > 0:10:14- Typical.- To deny him this,

0:10:14 > 0:10:18it is henceforth forbidden on pain of death

0:10:18 > 0:10:20to speak the name Herostratus.

0:10:20 > 0:10:22You just said it.

0:10:22 > 0:10:24No, no, no, no, it's not started yet.

0:10:25 > 0:10:29So the law against saying Herostratus actually starts...

0:10:30 > 0:10:32..n-n-no-o-o-o-o-o...

0:10:32 > 0:10:35ALL: Herostratus, Herostratus, Herostratus, Herostratus...

0:10:35 > 0:10:37- ..o-o-o-o... - ALL: ..Herostratus, Herostratus...

0:10:37 > 0:10:39...o-o-w!

0:10:39 > 0:10:41What about writing it down?

0:10:41 > 0:10:43I mean, if you write it down,

0:10:43 > 0:10:45it's not the same as saying, "Herostratus".

0:10:45 > 0:10:46- Oh.- Right, he said it.

0:10:46 > 0:10:48- Arrest him.- No, no, no, I didn't.

0:10:48 > 0:10:50I said, "hero stabilisers".

0:10:50 > 0:10:52That's what I said, didn't I?

0:10:52 > 0:10:54It's made up. It's made up.

0:10:54 > 0:10:57- It's good.- All right.

0:10:57 > 0:10:59Just not Herostratus.

0:10:59 > 0:11:00Ah!

0:11:00 > 0:11:03- Fair enough.- Sorry I'm late, everyone.

0:11:03 > 0:11:05- What have I missed? - There's a new law.

0:11:05 > 0:11:07You can't mention... You know...

0:11:09 > 0:11:11No, I don't know. I've only just arrived.

0:11:11 > 0:11:12H-h-h-h...

0:11:13 > 0:11:16He who must not be named.

0:11:16 > 0:11:17Voldemort?

0:11:19 > 0:11:20Thanks very much.

0:11:22 > 0:11:25Sorry, I can't read.

0:11:25 > 0:11:27- What does that say?- Herostratus.

0:11:27 > 0:11:29- He said it!- Said what?

0:11:29 > 0:11:31Herostratus!

0:11:31 > 0:11:35- Who's Herostratus?- Everybody's got to stop saying Herostratus.

0:11:35 > 0:11:37He's done it again!

0:11:37 > 0:11:40Someone must've said Herostratus.

0:11:40 > 0:11:42- I'm under arrest. - He said Herostratus.

0:11:42 > 0:11:46I said it again!

0:11:46 > 0:11:47What was his name again?

0:11:47 > 0:11:49Herostratus.

0:11:49 > 0:11:51Ha-ha, made you say it.

0:11:51 > 0:11:53- Made me say what?- Herostratus.

0:11:53 > 0:11:56- Ha-ha.- Stop it, the pair of you.

0:11:57 > 0:12:01I wonder who history's deadliest villains would be?

0:12:01 > 0:12:04Well, there's only one man who could tell us.

0:12:04 > 0:12:08I'm Steve Biceps and this is my search for History's Deadliest 60.

0:12:10 > 0:12:11I'm going in.

0:12:16 > 0:12:20We're here in the 18th century and just over there is

0:12:20 > 0:12:24Prince William Augustus, the infamous Butcher Cumberland.

0:12:24 > 0:12:26Let's take a closer look.

0:12:26 > 0:12:28No, sorry, Steve, keep it on.

0:12:29 > 0:12:31OK.

0:12:31 > 0:12:32What a remarkable animal.

0:12:32 > 0:12:35- Certainly one of my favourites. - Boo!- Argh!

0:12:35 > 0:12:37He smashed the Scots at the Battle of Culloden,

0:12:37 > 0:12:40he shot retreating men in the back and he wiped out the Highland clan

0:12:40 > 0:12:43leaders and, if that wasn't horrible enough,

0:12:43 > 0:12:45he actually tried to ban tartan.

0:12:47 > 0:12:49You wouldn't call this tartan, would you?

0:12:49 > 0:12:51It's more of a snazzy check.

0:12:51 > 0:12:53What is the meaning of this?

0:12:55 > 0:12:57All right, big guy, calm down, calm down.

0:12:57 > 0:12:59We need to show him that we are not a threat.

0:12:59 > 0:13:02One false move and we could become Cumberland sausages.

0:13:06 > 0:13:08Wiping out a whole national identity,

0:13:08 > 0:13:11the Butcher of Cumberland makes my Deadly 60.

0:13:14 > 0:13:15Come here!

0:13:15 > 0:13:17Leg it! Leg it!

0:13:17 > 0:13:19Run! Run!

0:13:21 > 0:13:22See you next time.

0:13:23 > 0:13:27Hi, I'm Matthew Hopkins, Witchfinder General.

0:13:27 > 0:13:29Has your horse gone lame?

0:13:29 > 0:13:31Your milk turned sour?

0:13:31 > 0:13:33Does your ear feel a bit hot?

0:13:33 > 0:13:35Then either you've mistreated your horse,

0:13:35 > 0:13:38left your milk out in the sun and got a sunburned ear,

0:13:38 > 0:13:41or you've been cursed by a witch!

0:13:41 > 0:13:43You need Witch Out.

0:13:43 > 0:13:45To repel all witches' curses.

0:13:45 > 0:13:48Because they're everywhere and you don't always know you've got them.

0:13:48 > 0:13:51For the unbelievably low price of all your money,

0:13:51 > 0:13:53our technician will visit your hovel

0:13:53 > 0:13:55and install the Witch Out

0:13:55 > 0:13:57curse repeller into your wall.

0:13:57 > 0:13:59All you've done is put a shoe in a wall.

0:14:00 > 0:14:02Witch! She's a witch!

0:14:02 > 0:14:04- Arrest her!- I'm not. - Yes, you are.

0:14:04 > 0:14:07That's exactly what a witch would say anyway.

0:14:07 > 0:14:10Why not try our new premium Witch Out device?

0:14:10 > 0:14:13Bang! And the curse is gone.

0:14:13 > 0:14:14Where's Mr Fluffkins gone?

0:14:17 > 0:14:20Don't tell me - you ain't stuffed my cat up the...

0:14:20 > 0:14:23Witch! She's a witch! Get the witch!

0:14:23 > 0:14:25I ain't a witch. I'm an old lady.

0:14:25 > 0:14:27No matter which Witch Out you choose,

0:14:27 > 0:14:29witches watch out - with Witch Out,

0:14:29 > 0:14:32we keep witches at bay the Witch Out way.

0:14:32 > 0:14:33As recommended in

0:14:33 > 0:14:34Witch? magazine.

0:14:36 > 0:14:38Matthew Hopkins really did accuse

0:14:38 > 0:14:40lots of innocent women of being witches

0:14:40 > 0:14:43and he made a lot of money doing it too.

0:14:43 > 0:14:46I suppose you're going to defend him?

0:14:46 > 0:14:49Actually, no, that would be pretty bad, even for a demon.

0:14:49 > 0:14:52Yeah, I think we've had our share of villains for the moment, don't you?

0:14:52 > 0:14:56How about looking at some true British heroes?

0:14:56 > 0:14:59Maybe just this once.

0:14:59 > 0:15:00But I won't enjoy it.

0:15:00 > 0:15:03OK, this British hero was the tops.

0:15:03 > 0:15:05And the bottoms.

0:15:05 > 0:15:07I don't find that funny.

0:15:13 > 0:15:15- WEST COUNTRY ACCENT:- Oh, hi.

0:15:15 > 0:15:19I'm heroic swashbuckling privateer, buccaneer and adventurer

0:15:19 > 0:15:24Sir Walter Raleigh. I was a favourite of Elizabeth I,

0:15:24 > 0:15:25explored America,

0:15:25 > 0:15:31and went on the hunt for the mythical City of Gold, Eldorado!

0:15:31 > 0:15:35Now, sailing across the ocean in Tudor times could be tricky.

0:15:35 > 0:15:40And we didn't have any toilets on ships, so here's a top tip from me.

0:15:40 > 0:15:43If you gotta go, go over the side.

0:15:46 > 0:15:48PARP!

0:15:48 > 0:15:50SPLASH!

0:15:50 > 0:15:52Ooh, a floater!

0:15:52 > 0:15:53Hmm.

0:15:57 > 0:15:59Aargh!

0:16:01 > 0:16:04Another top tip, make sure you hold on to something.

0:16:05 > 0:16:06Ah, not a floater.

0:16:09 > 0:16:10Top tip, Mr Raleigh.

0:16:10 > 0:16:14Elizabeth I certainly thought Sir Walter Raleigh was a hero

0:16:14 > 0:16:17but the Spanish sailors he attacked definitely thought he was a villain.

0:16:17 > 0:16:19Confusing, isn't it?

0:16:19 > 0:16:23Well, here's a hero from World War II we can all agree on.

0:16:23 > 0:16:24Douglas Bader.

0:16:24 > 0:16:27Despite losing both legs in an accident,

0:16:27 > 0:16:30he still flew fighter planes in the Battle of Britain.

0:16:30 > 0:16:31And when he was captured,

0:16:31 > 0:16:34he never gave up his efforts to beat the enemy.

0:16:35 > 0:16:38I must say, I appreciate you letting a British bomber drop me a new

0:16:38 > 0:16:40artificial leg after I lost the other in the crash.

0:16:41 > 0:16:43Keep this one company.

0:16:43 > 0:16:44You're welcome.

0:16:44 > 0:16:46What with us being sworn enemies.

0:16:46 > 0:16:49Yeah, we wouldn't do this for any other prisoner of war,

0:16:49 > 0:16:53but to the German military, Douglas Bader,

0:16:53 > 0:16:58the fighter pilot that shot down 23 planes with no legs,

0:16:58 > 0:17:00is a leg-end.

0:17:00 > 0:17:03I think it's pronounced legend, but thank you very much.

0:17:03 > 0:17:07Also your bomber pilots promised not to drop any bombs whilst delivering

0:17:07 > 0:17:10the new leg. We do, however, have one request.

0:17:10 > 0:17:11Yes, anything, dear boy.

0:17:11 > 0:17:14- Name it.- Please stop escaping.

0:17:17 > 0:17:20- That old chestnut.- It is very embarrassing, Herr Bader.

0:17:20 > 0:17:23You keep running away with no legs.

0:17:23 > 0:17:24Makes us look really bad.

0:17:24 > 0:17:26Are you sure it's just that which is making you look bad?

0:17:26 > 0:17:29Even in hospital, you tied your sheets together and leapt out of

0:17:29 > 0:17:31the window. Where were you going?

0:17:31 > 0:17:34You're in Germany. With one tin leg, for blooming sake.

0:17:34 > 0:17:37Well, I'm afraid it is the duty of every British officer

0:17:37 > 0:17:39to try to escape.

0:17:39 > 0:17:41Yeah, yeah, "a duty is a duty". Just stop it.

0:17:41 > 0:17:44PLANE ENGINE ROARS

0:17:44 > 0:17:45There it is.

0:17:47 > 0:17:54Right, I hope this gesture will stop you trying to escape.

0:17:55 > 0:17:59If not, then I will send you to Colditz,

0:17:59 > 0:18:02a fortress from which THERE IS NO ESCAPE!

0:18:02 > 0:18:04Sorry. A little bit shouty.

0:18:04 > 0:18:06Force of habit.

0:18:07 > 0:18:10Well, I promise, no escaping.

0:18:10 > 0:18:12Good. And I trust you.

0:18:12 > 0:18:16- You can trust me.- Just as I trust your bomber pilots who promised

0:18:16 > 0:18:19not to drop bombs after delivering the leg.

0:18:19 > 0:18:21Although thinking about it,

0:18:21 > 0:18:26it's a little bit weird to choose bomber planes when a regular plane

0:18:26 > 0:18:28would be just as good.

0:18:28 > 0:18:29Unless, of course, you wish to drop...

0:18:29 > 0:18:31BOOM!

0:18:31 > 0:18:32Oh, come on!

0:18:32 > 0:18:34We had a deal!

0:18:36 > 0:18:38Can you believe these guys?

0:18:38 > 0:18:39Not cool!

0:18:43 > 0:18:45He's legged it.

0:18:45 > 0:18:46He's legged it.

0:18:48 > 0:18:49Aargh! I mean, ah.

0:18:49 > 0:18:51I mean, hello.

0:18:51 > 0:18:55I'm Admiral Lord Nelson and I have a question for you.

0:18:55 > 0:18:59I was one of the greatest heroes of the British Empire, so when I was

0:18:59 > 0:19:03finally killed at the victorious Battle of Trafalgar,

0:19:03 > 0:19:05what did the sailors do with my body?

0:19:07 > 0:19:08Did they...

0:19:20 > 0:19:22The answer is...

0:19:22 > 0:19:25They shoved me in a barrel of brandy.

0:19:25 > 0:19:27It's not as bad as it sounds, though.

0:19:27 > 0:19:30It was the best way to preserve my body so that I could have a proper

0:19:30 > 0:19:32funeral when I got home.

0:19:32 > 0:19:34Mind you, there was a rumour that the sailors

0:19:34 > 0:19:37actually drank the brandy on the journey home.

0:19:37 > 0:19:38I mean, can you imagine?

0:19:38 > 0:19:41I know people like their drinks full-bodied,

0:19:41 > 0:19:42but that's just ridiculous!

0:19:46 > 0:19:47We're here in the 17th century,

0:19:47 > 0:19:49on the lookout for one of history's most

0:19:49 > 0:19:50ambitious predators.

0:19:51 > 0:19:52Let's hide.

0:19:54 > 0:19:55I've spotted him.

0:19:55 > 0:19:57Just over there, that's Guy Fawkes.

0:19:57 > 0:20:00Now, he may look cute, but there's one deadly little fella.

0:20:01 > 0:20:04Guy Fawkes wants to blow up everyone in the Houses of Parliament,

0:20:04 > 0:20:06including the King.

0:20:06 > 0:20:08With that massive pile of gunpowder.

0:20:10 > 0:20:11But what's this?

0:20:11 > 0:20:13Stop! In the name of the King!

0:20:14 > 0:20:15I can explain.

0:20:15 > 0:20:19Guy might be a villain, but his plot is an epic fail and,

0:20:19 > 0:20:22for that reason, he doesn't make my Deadly 60.

0:20:24 > 0:20:27Some guys have none of the luck, do they?

0:20:27 > 0:20:28Anyway, join me next time on...

0:20:28 > 0:20:30No! No! No!

0:20:32 > 0:20:34No!

0:20:38 > 0:20:41If Guy Fawkes had succeeded,

0:20:41 > 0:20:42he would probably have gone down as

0:20:42 > 0:20:46one of the most villainous villains in all history.

0:20:46 > 0:20:49And, even worse, we wouldn't get to have Bonfire Night.

0:20:49 > 0:20:51OK, next, a heroine

0:20:51 > 0:20:54who helped to change the way we think about the world

0:20:54 > 0:20:56and all the people in it.

0:21:00 > 0:21:02Hello and welcome to this special event,

0:21:02 > 0:21:05as we are set to see the latest exotic import from America.

0:21:07 > 0:21:11Today I would like to introduce to you a beautiful young princess

0:21:11 > 0:21:13from the Powhatan Pamunkey Indians of Virginia.

0:21:13 > 0:21:17Discovered by British explorers and brought here to London

0:21:17 > 0:21:21to show how the savage has been tamed.

0:21:21 > 0:21:24I give you Pocahontas.

0:21:24 > 0:21:27Fascinating. There hasn't been this much excitement since the potato.

0:21:27 > 0:21:30- Thank you for coming to my lecture. - Your lecture?

0:21:30 > 0:21:34I first discovered this man and his friends near my village

0:21:34 > 0:21:37on the eastern coast of America.

0:21:37 > 0:21:39There's some confusion over who discovered who.

0:21:39 > 0:21:42What are you talking about? You didn't discover us.

0:21:42 > 0:21:44We discovered you, remember?

0:21:44 > 0:21:47As I was saying before I was interrupted,

0:21:47 > 0:21:50when we discovered these people, they were so backwards.

0:21:50 > 0:21:52They couldn't feed themselves.

0:21:52 > 0:21:56We had to keep them alive by bringing them food.

0:21:56 > 0:21:58Well, this is unexpected.

0:21:58 > 0:22:00Oh, that is true, actually.

0:22:00 > 0:22:02She did do that, but this is absurd.

0:22:02 > 0:22:06Nobody had even set foot in the Americas until we landed there and

0:22:06 > 0:22:10- discovered you.- Well, obviously we had set foot on it.

0:22:10 > 0:22:12As you can see, these childlike savages

0:22:12 > 0:22:15barely understand basic logic and geography.

0:22:15 > 0:22:17All right, all right, all right.

0:22:17 > 0:22:19Look, let's agree to compromise.

0:22:19 > 0:22:22Let's say we discovered each other.

0:22:22 > 0:22:24That sounds fair.

0:22:24 > 0:22:27So, to conclude, one of us is a simple savage.

0:22:27 > 0:22:29And one of us is the Princess of the Pamunkey Indians.

0:22:29 > 0:22:33Right. Look, OK, we've got cannons, we've got guns, we've got armour.

0:22:33 > 0:22:35We could kill every single last one of you if we wanted.

0:22:37 > 0:22:39Who's the savage now, eh?

0:22:39 > 0:22:41I think you just answered your own question.

0:22:42 > 0:22:43Fair point, yeah.

0:22:45 > 0:22:47I'm here in Victorian England

0:22:47 > 0:22:50on the lookout for another dangerous predator.

0:22:51 > 0:22:53- Oh, cut.- What?

0:22:53 > 0:22:54Oh, how did that happen?

0:22:57 > 0:22:59All right, all right, keep your shirt on.

0:23:02 > 0:23:06Look, over there. That's Her Majesty Queen Victoria.

0:23:06 > 0:23:08So majestic in her natural habitat.

0:23:08 > 0:23:11But we're actually looking for someone else over there.

0:23:12 > 0:23:14That guy is Roderick Maclean.

0:23:14 > 0:23:16Now, he wants to kill Queen Victoria

0:23:16 > 0:23:18because she laughed at some of his poems.

0:23:18 > 0:23:20To be fair, they weren't that great.

0:23:22 > 0:23:25He's missed, but this plucky fella is persistent -

0:23:25 > 0:23:27he's going to try again. Look at this,

0:23:27 > 0:23:29he's been spotted by a pack of schoolboys.

0:23:29 > 0:23:31They're going in for the kill.

0:23:31 > 0:23:33That is truly magnificent, isn't it?

0:23:33 > 0:23:35Unfortunately, I can only sit and watch

0:23:35 > 0:23:37because I can't interfere with nature.

0:23:37 > 0:23:41Sorry, Roderick, you're well dodgy, but you don't make my Deadly 60.

0:23:45 > 0:23:46Agh! No, no! Not me!

0:23:46 > 0:23:47Not me! That is not cricket!

0:23:52 > 0:23:54Sun's out, guns out. See you next time.

0:23:57 > 0:24:00Look, you know what? I've made up my mind.

0:24:00 > 0:24:03I might be a rat, but that doesn't mean I can't be a hero.

0:24:03 > 0:24:05No-o-o-o-o-o-o-o!

0:24:05 > 0:24:08Yes! In your face, Devil Rat.

0:24:08 > 0:24:10Eat my halo!

0:24:10 > 0:24:14Bye-bye! Bye-bye!

0:24:14 > 0:24:16Well, that wasn't very heroic.

0:24:16 > 0:24:18Uh-oh.

0:24:18 > 0:24:20Well, it's obviously very hard being a hero.

0:24:20 > 0:24:24But here's one man who managed it - Martin Luther King.

0:24:24 > 0:24:27Yes, in the 1960s in the USA,

0:24:27 > 0:24:31there were villainous laws telling black people what they could

0:24:31 > 0:24:35and couldn't do. It was called segregation.

0:24:35 > 0:24:37It forced people to live in much worse conditions,

0:24:37 > 0:24:40and just because of the colour of their skin.

0:24:40 > 0:24:44It was worth fighting against, and that was just what he did.

0:24:44 > 0:24:46Take it away, Dr King.

0:24:46 > 0:24:48MUSIC IN THE STYLE OF HEROES by David Bowie

0:24:48 > 0:24:50# I'm

0:24:50 > 0:24:53# Martin Luther King

0:24:55 > 0:24:59# And I

0:24:59 > 0:25:01# I had a dream

0:25:04 > 0:25:08# It said the victory of civil rights

0:25:08 > 0:25:10# Was brought about thanks to me

0:25:10 > 0:25:14# But there were many, many more

0:25:16 > 0:25:18# Who made it reality

0:25:18 > 0:25:21# They were the heroes

0:25:21 > 0:25:25# Who made a dream come true

0:25:27 > 0:25:32# A Southern Christian Leadership Group was formed

0:25:32 > 0:25:34# Supported by black and white

0:25:36 > 0:25:38# Police arrested me

0:25:38 > 0:25:40# 30 times

0:25:40 > 0:25:43# Like that would make me give up the fight

0:25:43 > 0:25:47# Black and white kept apart

0:25:48 > 0:25:51# At school and even water fountains

0:25:52 > 0:25:55# But President Johnson's bold civil rights laws

0:25:55 > 0:25:59# Helped me climb further up the mountain

0:25:59 > 0:26:01# They were the heroes

0:26:03 > 0:26:05# Every day

0:26:07 > 0:26:10# I

0:26:10 > 0:26:12# Have a dream

0:26:12 > 0:26:16# That one day my children will not be judged

0:26:16 > 0:26:17# By the colour of their skin

0:26:19 > 0:26:24# But by the content of their character

0:26:24 > 0:26:26# When my life was ended

0:26:29 > 0:26:31# Theirs did begin

0:26:31 > 0:26:35# Within days of my assassination

0:26:35 > 0:26:38# Legislation was ushered in

0:26:38 > 0:26:42# And they were the heroes

0:26:42 > 0:26:44# Who made the dream come true

0:26:47 > 0:26:50# And they were the heroes

0:26:52 > 0:26:54# Who made a dream come true. #

0:27:03 > 0:27:07If not, then I will send you to Codzitz,

0:27:07 > 0:27:08a fortress from which...

0:27:08 > 0:27:09LAUGHTER

0:27:11 > 0:27:12LAUGHTER

0:27:12 > 0:27:14What?!

0:27:14 > 0:27:17# The past is no longer a mystery

0:27:17 > 0:27:18# Hope you enjoyed

0:27:18 > 0:27:20# Horrible Histories. #