Ingenious Inventors

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0:00:02 > 0:00:03# Terrible Tudors, gorgeous Georgians, slimy Stuarts

0:00:03 > 0:00:04# Vile Victorians, woeful wars

0:00:04 > 0:00:07# Ferocious fights, dingy castles, daring knights

0:00:07 > 0:00:09# Horrors that defy description Cut-throat Celts, awful Egyptians

0:00:09 > 0:00:12# Vicious Vikings, cruel crimes Punishment from ancient times

0:00:12 > 0:00:13# Romans, rotten, rank and ruthless

0:00:13 > 0:00:15# Cavemen, savage, fierce and toothless

0:00:15 > 0:00:18# Groovy Greeks, brainy sages Mean and measly Middle Ages

0:00:18 > 0:00:20# Gory stories, we do that

0:00:20 > 0:00:23# And your host, a talking rat

0:00:23 > 0:00:26# The past is no longer a mystery

0:00:26 > 0:00:27# Welcome to...

0:00:27 > 0:00:31# Horrible Histories. #

0:00:32 > 0:00:34Horrible Histories presents...

0:00:37 > 0:00:40Since the dawn of time we humans have been inventing things.

0:00:40 > 0:00:42Many of which are still in use today.

0:00:44 > 0:00:46I'll have a bit of turnip on that.

0:00:46 > 0:00:50Friends, I have an invention that is going to change the world.

0:00:50 > 0:00:55I call it...the wheel.

0:00:55 > 0:00:57The wheel.

0:00:57 > 0:00:59The wheel?

0:00:59 > 0:01:05Yep. Because "wheel" all benefit from it, so wheel.

0:01:05 > 0:01:06That's a working title.

0:01:06 > 0:01:08Probably change it. Anyway,

0:01:08 > 0:01:13the point is it helps you move heavy things with hardly any effort.

0:01:14 > 0:01:16- Don't work.- No, see, you're doing it wrong.

0:01:16 > 0:01:19So, you stand it up like this.

0:01:19 > 0:01:24Hold. And then, you put a stick in there.

0:01:24 > 0:01:26And then it moves.

0:01:26 > 0:01:28See? Clever, isn't it?

0:01:28 > 0:01:29Where do you put the turnips?

0:01:29 > 0:01:31- Yeah.- Well, I'm coming to that.

0:01:31 > 0:01:34I'll be honest with you, I prefer my sack.

0:01:34 > 0:01:38Friends, I too have an invention - it's better than yours.

0:01:38 > 0:01:41- This should be good. - Yeah, it is, actually.

0:01:41 > 0:01:44I present...

0:01:47 > 0:01:50- ..the other wheel. - Ooo.- What do you mean, "ooo"?

0:01:50 > 0:01:52- He's copied me?- No I haven't because yours is rubbish.

0:01:52 > 0:01:55Can't carry anything on that. But with mine...

0:01:57 > 0:01:59..there you go.

0:01:59 > 0:02:02- Ooo.- Nice.- Two more on the other end, a bit of a platform.

0:02:02 > 0:02:04And we all benefit.

0:02:04 > 0:02:07You could get the whole family on that, but

0:02:07 > 0:02:09at the same time, it's handy if you are just nipping out for a turnip.

0:02:09 > 0:02:12- Hello? Original inventor here! - Does it come in granite?

0:02:12 > 0:02:15Fine, I'm going to the next village.

0:02:15 > 0:02:17Perhaps there they will appreciate my genius.

0:02:23 > 0:02:26- Yeah, you know what would help you there?- Yes, I know!

0:02:26 > 0:02:28Yeah, so humans have invented stuff

0:02:28 > 0:02:31but what about the great rat inventions?

0:02:31 > 0:02:34Like, um, um...

0:02:34 > 0:02:36Does the plague count?

0:02:36 > 0:02:37No? Right, that's it,

0:02:37 > 0:02:41I'm going to prove rats can be great inventors, too.

0:02:41 > 0:02:44It's tricky, though. So much has already been invented.

0:02:44 > 0:02:48And lots of it by the Romans, the Greeks and the ancient Chinese.

0:02:48 > 0:02:49But I wonder which one was best.

0:02:51 > 0:02:52Yo, yo, it's going down right now.

0:02:52 > 0:02:55So, like, all these ancient Greeks, right,

0:02:55 > 0:02:57man, them turn up, talk about how we invented all this stuff.

0:02:57 > 0:03:00Way more than you Romans, right, and then the ancient Chinese guys,

0:03:00 > 0:03:02they turn up and they like, oh, we invented 'nuff stuff,

0:03:02 > 0:03:04way more than you Greeks.

0:03:04 > 0:03:05Now that is fighting talk, man.

0:03:05 > 0:03:08You get me? Things about to get real. Real fast.

0:03:08 > 0:03:09It's going to be nasty.

0:03:09 > 0:03:10All right, all right, I've got one.

0:03:10 > 0:03:14Yo, I'm a master inventor, the greatest in China

0:03:14 > 0:03:16Wasting my time with these Athenian whiners...

0:03:16 > 0:03:17No. Not me.

0:03:17 > 0:03:19We invented everything from goldfish to bum wipers

0:03:19 > 0:03:22We were inventing while Greeks were still in diapers.

0:03:22 > 0:03:25Yeah. That's all right, that's all right, listen up.

0:03:25 > 0:03:28Democracy, geometry, and even physics

0:03:28 > 0:03:30The marathon, the play and even the Olympics

0:03:30 > 0:03:33The alarm clock, the anchor and central heating

0:03:33 > 0:03:36The only way you're going to win this is if you invented cheating.

0:03:36 > 0:03:37Oh.

0:03:37 > 0:03:39You want a list, we've got oodles

0:03:39 > 0:03:40We invented noodles

0:03:40 > 0:03:44While you were doing doodles on the paper we invented for you.

0:03:44 > 0:03:46- Oh, yeah.- OK, sit down, and pull up a chair

0:03:46 > 0:03:48Like my steam engine you're full of hot air

0:03:48 > 0:03:51We invented mathematics, we even invented pi

0:03:51 > 0:03:53Oh, and by the way, your mama says, hi.

0:03:53 > 0:03:55- What?- Yeah.

0:03:55 > 0:03:57I just saw her down at the shops, with your dad.

0:03:57 > 0:03:59Check it out. The Greeks may fill pages with their books

0:03:59 > 0:04:02But we invented fishing reels for reeling in your hook

0:04:02 > 0:04:05Acupuncture, silk, cross bows and the bell

0:04:05 > 0:04:08Our inventions are awesome, while yours just smell.

0:04:08 > 0:04:10No, I ain't beat.

0:04:10 > 0:04:12Yo, yo, yo, yo yo, yo.

0:04:12 > 0:04:14Did we invent the yo-yo?

0:04:14 > 0:04:15OK, what about dominos?

0:04:15 > 0:04:18- That was us.- Yeah all right, what about the compass then, yeah?

0:04:18 > 0:04:21Yeah, us. Give it up man, the word is on the street

0:04:21 > 0:04:23It was China versus Greece and you got beat.

0:04:25 > 0:04:27OK, let me do one, let me do one.

0:04:27 > 0:04:29Yeah, it's true, you guys invented a lot of cool stuff

0:04:29 > 0:04:32And yeah, beating that is gonna be tough

0:04:32 > 0:04:34But I have something that will have you all shushin'

0:04:34 > 0:04:38I'm a mighty Roman home of the whoopee cushion.

0:04:41 > 0:04:44Literally what? What was that?

0:04:44 > 0:04:45- Ridiculous, man. - The whoopee cushion.

0:04:49 > 0:04:51PFFFT! Ha-ha, genius.

0:04:51 > 0:04:54Of course, we Romans invented more than just a whoopee cushion.

0:04:54 > 0:04:56We wrote the book on inventions.

0:04:56 > 0:04:58Well, kind of.

0:04:58 > 0:05:00Time for your bedtime story, Atticus.

0:05:00 > 0:05:02Now where were we up to?

0:05:05 > 0:05:07Mummy, can't we just read from this instead?

0:05:07 > 0:05:09Is called a codex, it's new.

0:05:09 > 0:05:11At school they're calling them books.

0:05:11 > 0:05:13You cannot have a codex, Atticus.

0:05:13 > 0:05:15I always read you a scroll at bedtime.

0:05:15 > 0:05:17Mummy, stopping being so Etruscan.

0:05:17 > 0:05:19Scrolls are so not cool.

0:05:19 > 0:05:22A book is really portable and also you can find your place

0:05:22 > 0:05:24without having to unravel the whole thing.

0:05:24 > 0:05:27I don't like those modern devices.

0:05:27 > 0:05:30It will give you eyestrain and your arms will get tired,

0:05:30 > 0:05:31from all that page-turning.

0:05:31 > 0:05:33Everyone at school has got one.

0:05:33 > 0:05:35Just because your friends have codexes...

0:05:35 > 0:05:36It's codices actually, Mummy.

0:05:36 > 0:05:39Nobody likes a smarty-pants.

0:05:39 > 0:05:41Now then, uh, here we are.

0:05:43 > 0:05:45"That morning the mighty warrior..."

0:05:45 > 0:05:47I've already read that bit, Mummy.

0:05:47 > 0:05:49Let's see, let's see.

0:05:51 > 0:05:55Find it. Ah, here we go.

0:05:55 > 0:06:00"And then the great warrior was stabbed to death."

0:06:00 > 0:06:02Sorry, too far, spoiler alert.

0:06:02 > 0:06:03Forget you heard that bit.

0:06:03 > 0:06:05Um, not there, not there.

0:06:05 > 0:06:07Back here. Maybe.

0:06:08 > 0:06:10Read that, not there.

0:06:10 > 0:06:11That's the bit where he pops.

0:06:11 > 0:06:14Ah ha!

0:06:14 > 0:06:15Here we go, Atticus.

0:06:17 > 0:06:18Atticus?

0:06:23 > 0:06:24Atticus?

0:06:27 > 0:06:29Fine, you win.

0:06:29 > 0:06:30We'll read your codex.

0:06:30 > 0:06:35It's fun to get lost in the story, isn't it, Mummy?

0:06:36 > 0:06:38So that codex led to books.

0:06:38 > 0:06:41All of which had to be written out by hand

0:06:41 > 0:06:45until one of the most important inventions of all time

0:06:45 > 0:06:47nearly 600 years ago.

0:06:47 > 0:06:50And this one really did change the world.

0:06:51 > 0:06:52Yippee!

0:06:55 > 0:06:58HE SPEAKS LATIN

0:06:58 > 0:07:00Oh.

0:07:04 > 0:07:05Holy Father, who art in Heaven,

0:07:05 > 0:07:08I'm so sorry for ruining another page of your blessed word.

0:07:08 > 0:07:11Tired of writing the whole Bible out by hand?

0:07:11 > 0:07:12Is that you, God?

0:07:13 > 0:07:15The next best thing.

0:07:15 > 0:07:19I'm Johannes Gutenberg, and this is my all-new printed Bible.

0:07:19 > 0:07:21Ooo.

0:07:21 > 0:07:24The world's first mass-produced Bible.

0:07:24 > 0:07:28180 copies from press to pew, before you can say Jehoshaphat.

0:07:30 > 0:07:33All your favourite stories, from Adam and Eve, to the end of days.

0:07:33 > 0:07:38Printed in clear, readable Latin on paper or luxury cow skin.

0:07:38 > 0:07:39It's a miracle.

0:07:39 > 0:07:42No, monk. It's moveable type.

0:07:42 > 0:07:45Simply arrange the letters on the metal block

0:07:45 > 0:07:48to create the word or phrase you require and print.

0:07:50 > 0:07:52And print.

0:07:52 > 0:07:54And print.

0:07:54 > 0:07:56And print again! No more fiddly quills.

0:07:56 > 0:07:57No more bad back.

0:07:57 > 0:08:00No more careless spelling, please.

0:08:00 > 0:08:02- Thanks, Gutenberg! - Well not so fast, monk.

0:08:02 > 0:08:07Don't thank me. Because with the Gutenberg Bible,

0:08:07 > 0:08:09you're out of work.

0:08:11 > 0:08:13The new moveable type.

0:08:13 > 0:08:15Taking the monkey business out of...

0:08:15 > 0:08:17- Hey.- And again.

0:08:17 > 0:08:18That's going to go in someone's eye.

0:08:18 > 0:08:21- Boo ya!- Oh. Great, that got in my eye, are you happy?

0:08:22 > 0:08:23Jehoshaphat!

0:08:29 > 0:08:31Those stairs are killing me.

0:08:31 > 0:08:33There has got to be an easier way.

0:08:33 > 0:08:36I can't make any sense of this book you've written, Ishmael.

0:08:36 > 0:08:38It's just a list of words.

0:08:38 > 0:08:40That's because it's a dictionary.

0:08:40 > 0:08:42What's a dictionary?

0:08:42 > 0:08:43Look it up.

0:08:46 > 0:08:51Oh, dictionary, a book that gives the correct definition of words.

0:08:51 > 0:08:53Oh, I see. Very original.

0:08:53 > 0:09:00Of course it's original - I, Ishmael al Jawhari, am a great pioneer.

0:09:00 > 0:09:03Pioneer, what's... Oh no, don't tell me, look it up.

0:09:07 > 0:09:09Ah, one who achieves or discovers something

0:09:09 > 0:09:13- for the first time.- Indeed.

0:09:13 > 0:09:17Yesterday was the dictionary, today I'm master human aviation.

0:09:17 > 0:09:19Aviation?

0:09:19 > 0:09:20Right, OK.

0:09:20 > 0:09:22Just bear with me.

0:09:22 > 0:09:26Aviation, the science of flight.

0:09:26 > 0:09:28Give me another.

0:09:28 > 0:09:32AHHHHHH!

0:09:32 > 0:09:35Ahhhhhh? OK, that will be somewhere near the beginning.

0:09:35 > 0:09:36HE CONTINUES TO SCREAM

0:09:38 > 0:09:39No, no, it's not here.

0:09:41 > 0:09:42Splat. Right.

0:09:42 > 0:09:45OK. Oh, yes, that's here.

0:09:45 > 0:09:51The sound made by a soft object on impact with a hard surface.

0:09:51 > 0:09:52Oh. This book's great, Ishmael.

0:09:54 > 0:09:55Ishmael?

0:09:58 > 0:10:01It's true Ishmael al Jawhari invented the Arabic dictionary

0:10:01 > 0:10:04then died trying to invent human flight.

0:10:04 > 0:10:07It just shows how important planning is.

0:10:07 > 0:10:11That's why I've created blueprints for my new invention.

0:10:11 > 0:10:16Unfortunately, they're blue cheese prints and they are delicious.

0:10:17 > 0:10:19Oh, well, back to the drawing board.

0:10:19 > 0:10:21Or the cheese board, more like!

0:10:21 > 0:10:22Ha, ha, ha.

0:10:22 > 0:10:26Maybe I can get some inspiration from this next ingenious inventor -

0:10:26 > 0:10:28he made lots of plans.

0:10:28 > 0:10:30Bet they weren't as tasty as mine.

0:10:32 > 0:10:34It's a new term and headteacher Hannah Lawrence

0:10:34 > 0:10:37has less than two weeks to turn around the fortunes of a school

0:10:37 > 0:10:40whose latest Ofsted rating was IMHO, not GR8.

0:10:40 > 0:10:43Welcome to Historical Educating.

0:10:44 > 0:10:46It's Monday morning, and class 7F

0:10:46 > 0:10:48have a new design-and-technology teacher.

0:10:48 > 0:10:52We needed a supply teacher and Mr da Vinci had a very impressive

0:10:52 > 0:10:58CV. Leonardo can teach art, music, geography, hydraulic engineering -

0:10:58 > 0:10:59not much call for that one here -

0:10:59 > 0:11:01everything apart from advanced physics.

0:11:02 > 0:11:04Oh, and advanced physics.

0:11:04 > 0:11:06Good morning, everyone.

0:11:06 > 0:11:08ALL: Good morning Mr...

0:11:08 > 0:11:11Ic Ni Vad?

0:11:11 > 0:11:13It's close. Da Vinci.

0:11:13 > 0:11:16But you can call me Leonardo.

0:11:16 > 0:11:19Sir, why did you write your name backwards?

0:11:19 > 0:11:23Good question. It's called mirror writing.

0:11:23 > 0:11:26Optics.

0:11:26 > 0:11:30You guys know how eyeballs work, right?

0:11:31 > 0:11:33Go on, dissect them.

0:11:33 > 0:11:35Get to know them. Paint on them.

0:11:35 > 0:11:37Use them as missiles.

0:11:37 > 0:11:38Why not?

0:11:41 > 0:11:43- Who threw this?- Ryan.

0:11:44 > 0:11:47Ryan, you are a genius.

0:11:47 > 0:11:49- I am?- We're going to make a full-size version,

0:11:49 > 0:11:52strap it to your back and then throw you from the roof of the school.

0:11:52 > 0:11:54No. I might die.

0:11:54 > 0:11:56Good point, I don't need another corpse.

0:11:59 > 0:12:01Mr da Vinci is well weird.

0:12:01 > 0:12:03OK, time to learn about dissection.

0:12:03 > 0:12:04Everybody grab a knife.

0:12:07 > 0:12:09He's the best teacher I've ever had.

0:12:10 > 0:12:13The headteacher has heard worrying reports

0:12:13 > 0:12:15about Mr da Vinci's teaching methods.

0:12:15 > 0:12:19Sir, there's not enough space on the whiteboard.

0:12:19 > 0:12:24OK, everybody, it's time to start writing on the wall.

0:12:24 > 0:12:25It's al fresco time.

0:12:27 > 0:12:30So Mr da Vinci is called in to see the headteacher.

0:12:30 > 0:12:32Ciao, Maestra.

0:12:32 > 0:12:36Mr da Vinci, I'm a little concerned by some of the work

0:12:36 > 0:12:39- coming out of your class.- I agree, call that an intestine?

0:12:39 > 0:12:41It looks like overcooked linguine.

0:12:41 > 0:12:44And you tried to get Ryan Murray to jump off the school roof?

0:12:44 > 0:12:49Listen, I'm as disappointed as you that he pulled out, but

0:12:49 > 0:12:51I guess he didn't have the stomach for it.

0:12:51 > 0:12:52- Ha-ha.- You're fired.

0:12:52 > 0:12:54What?

0:12:54 > 0:12:55That reminds me...

0:13:02 > 0:13:03..it's a three-barrelled cannon.

0:13:03 > 0:13:05We made it in Year Seven.

0:13:05 > 0:13:07The kids call it the Big Bang theory.

0:13:07 > 0:13:09- Ha-ha.- Please leave.

0:13:13 > 0:13:14Ryan, help me.

0:13:15 > 0:13:17Leonardo da Vinci really did design a flying machine,

0:13:17 > 0:13:20but he never got further than drawing it.

0:13:20 > 0:13:25It took two incredible brothers from America to finally create the first

0:13:25 > 0:13:26aeroplane. Good day.

0:13:28 > 0:13:29BANG!

0:13:31 > 0:13:32Needs some work.

0:13:33 > 0:13:37Jiminy Cricket, Wilbur, I sure as heck am excited.

0:13:37 > 0:13:40- Hoo wee.- Sure, Orville, me, too.

0:13:40 > 0:13:44All that painstaking, good old-fashioned hard work.

0:13:44 > 0:13:47Calculating in wind tunnels, observing birds in flight,

0:13:47 > 0:13:51all leading up to this one glorious moment when the Wright brothers

0:13:51 > 0:13:54accomplish the first manned flight of an aircraft with an engine.

0:13:54 > 0:13:56Am I right, or am I right?

0:13:56 > 0:13:58Yeah, well, you must be even more excited

0:13:58 > 0:13:59to be the first one to fly it.

0:13:59 > 0:14:00Yea... Wait, what?

0:14:00 > 0:14:03- Yeah, I think you should fly it first.- Yeah.

0:14:05 > 0:14:07I don't know though.

0:14:07 > 0:14:08I'm not sure I would be so good.

0:14:08 > 0:14:11Too darned excited. I might start smiling too much,

0:14:11 > 0:14:16- lose control of the plane.- Listen, I would love to die...

0:14:16 > 0:14:20Fly. But I just think you would be so much better.

0:14:20 > 0:14:24Well, sure is kind of you to say, brother, but...

0:14:24 > 0:14:27Say, I know what would be a heap of fun.

0:14:27 > 0:14:29- Let's flip a coin. - Fine, that sounds fair.

0:14:29 > 0:14:31- Heads or tails?- Tails.

0:14:32 > 0:14:34Tails it is.

0:14:35 > 0:14:37See, this is so much fun.

0:14:38 > 0:14:43- Best of three?- Fine. Tails. - Tails twice in a row, you crazy...

0:14:43 > 0:14:46- Oh, come on! The coin is rigged. - Orville, that's your lucky coin.

0:14:46 > 0:14:50Well, it's a shame I don't gots my goggles.

0:14:50 > 0:14:51Going to my room and getting them now.

0:14:51 > 0:14:55- Orville.- Yes.- Get on the plane.- OK.

0:15:06 > 0:15:08- UNENTHUSIASTICALLY:- Hoo wee!

0:15:13 > 0:15:15This is the greatest feeling in the world.

0:15:15 > 0:15:16I don't know what I was so afraid of.

0:15:16 > 0:15:18I'm glad I decided against the helmet...

0:15:18 > 0:15:21No, I am going down.

0:15:25 > 0:15:27Hoo wee.

0:15:39 > 0:15:40Good evening.

0:15:40 > 0:15:45I am Charles Babbage, the inventor and computing pioneer.

0:15:45 > 0:15:47And I am Ada Lovelace.

0:15:47 > 0:15:50I'm also a computing pioneer and I've carved out

0:15:50 > 0:15:52my own impressive career.

0:15:52 > 0:15:56I'm also the daughter of famous poet and rogue Lord Byron,

0:15:56 > 0:15:58but I don't like to talk about that.

0:15:58 > 0:16:01Yeah, well... Well, maybe don't mention it at all, then.

0:16:01 > 0:16:06Together we helped create one of the world's first-ever computers.

0:16:06 > 0:16:10Yes, but inventing can be a dangerous business.

0:16:10 > 0:16:13What was I inventing when I nearly drowned?

0:16:15 > 0:16:19Was it...

0:16:26 > 0:16:28The answer is A.

0:16:28 > 0:16:30A pair of shoes that could walk on water.

0:16:30 > 0:16:32Except, of course, they couldn't walk on water, could they?

0:16:35 > 0:16:39I also invented a cow catcher to go on the front of trains.

0:16:40 > 0:16:41Moo. Moooo-ve.

0:16:42 > 0:16:45Very funny.

0:16:45 > 0:16:48Those darned Germans are pushing us hard.

0:16:48 > 0:16:51We need something new to take the fight back to the Nazis.

0:16:51 > 0:16:54Well, this young chap here has come up with some

0:16:54 > 0:16:56new kind of missile technology.

0:16:56 > 0:16:58Could be just what we need.

0:16:58 > 0:16:59Show us what you've got, son.

0:17:07 > 0:17:11Thank you. So my associate and I have developed a technique

0:17:11 > 0:17:16to prevent the enemy from jamming the radio signals on our torpedoes.

0:17:16 > 0:17:17You know who you look like?

0:17:18 > 0:17:21- I'm sorry.- That famous Hollywood actress - what's her name?

0:17:21 > 0:17:24- Hedy Lamarr.- Yeah.- Yes, I am she.

0:17:24 > 0:17:25No way!

0:17:25 > 0:17:27- Oh, man!- He likes you.

0:17:27 > 0:17:30- No, I don't!- Yes, you do, don't be shy.

0:17:30 > 0:17:31- I like you.- Me, too.

0:17:33 > 0:17:37Most flattering. Anyway, back to my invention.

0:17:37 > 0:17:39The problem with the existing torpedoes...

0:17:39 > 0:17:41Yeah, yeah, yeah, why are you doing that accent?

0:17:41 > 0:17:43I was born in Austria.

0:17:43 > 0:17:47But I'm here because I have invented something that might help us

0:17:47 > 0:17:50- win the war. - Are we in a movie right now?

0:17:50 > 0:17:54No. Unless you would like to be in a movie called How We Lost The War,

0:17:54 > 0:17:56I recommend you listen.

0:17:56 > 0:18:00The frequency-hopping secret communication system I propose...

0:18:00 > 0:18:01I think I might propose in a minute.

0:18:01 > 0:18:03Me, too.

0:18:03 > 0:18:04Will you please listen?

0:18:06 > 0:18:09The frequency of the signal constantly changes so that...

0:18:09 > 0:18:11It's incredible, I almost believe you actually know

0:18:11 > 0:18:15- what you're talking about. - I do know what I'm talking about.

0:18:15 > 0:18:16Diva alert!

0:18:16 > 0:18:19Gentleman, you are imbeciles.

0:18:19 > 0:18:20- Good day.- Miss Lamarr.

0:18:23 > 0:18:24Do you think I could be an actor?

0:18:27 > 0:18:29- That's a yes.- Great exit.

0:18:31 > 0:18:35It's true Hedy Lamarr really was a famous movie star

0:18:35 > 0:18:39and inventor and her plans eventually led to the creation

0:18:39 > 0:18:44of Wi-Fi which of course we all use today. Top work, Hedy.

0:18:44 > 0:18:48And look, I've managed to redraw the blueprints.

0:18:48 > 0:18:50I ran out of blue cheese, I've had to use Swiss.

0:18:52 > 0:18:54Mustn't eat it. Mustn't eat it.

0:18:54 > 0:18:57You know, there's another famous invention we all eat,

0:18:57 > 0:19:00and it came about in a rather unexpected way.

0:19:00 > 0:19:02Oh, who am I kidding?

0:19:03 > 0:19:06Good evening. George Crumb, the chef,

0:19:06 > 0:19:08I hope everything was satisfactory.

0:19:08 > 0:19:10I hope everything was satisfactory.

0:19:10 > 0:19:11Oh, the fish was divine.

0:19:11 > 0:19:14And this cherry pie was to die for.

0:19:14 > 0:19:15- It was perfect.- Thank you.

0:19:15 > 0:19:17Thank you.

0:19:17 > 0:19:20If I can make one teeny-weeny suggestion?

0:19:21 > 0:19:22What?

0:19:25 > 0:19:29I was wondering whether you could make your French fries

0:19:29 > 0:19:30a little thinner?

0:19:30 > 0:19:32These were a little bit thick for my liking.

0:19:34 > 0:19:36- Thick?- A tiny bit.

0:19:36 > 0:19:38Yeah, sure.

0:19:38 > 0:19:40I mean, they are gargantuan, aren't they?

0:19:40 > 0:19:43They're so big, I wonder how you could fit them in your mouth

0:19:43 > 0:19:46without your head falling open.

0:19:46 > 0:19:49Look, you can barely see it from one side to the other.

0:19:49 > 0:19:53It's way too big to fit in your tiny little mouse mouth!

0:19:53 > 0:19:56Well, I was just wondering if you could cut them a little thinner,

0:19:56 > 0:19:59- that's all.- Oh, his Lordship, the king of Saratoga Lake,

0:19:59 > 0:20:01wants them thinner, then?

0:20:01 > 0:20:04I'll give you thinner!

0:20:04 > 0:20:06What? I just...

0:20:11 > 0:20:12There, is that thin enough for you?

0:20:17 > 0:20:18Now you are just being silly.

0:20:18 > 0:20:20No, nothing is too much for the potato police.

0:20:20 > 0:20:23I told you not to mention the French fries.

0:20:23 > 0:20:24I was very restrained.

0:20:24 > 0:20:26Every time we go anywhere.

0:20:26 > 0:20:29There, there you go.

0:20:29 > 0:20:30There you go.

0:20:31 > 0:20:32Tuck in!

0:20:33 > 0:20:34Is this thin enough for you?

0:20:34 > 0:20:37Oh, dear, you can't see through that?

0:20:37 > 0:20:41Maybe I should shave a little off the top for Count Skinny Chip.

0:20:42 > 0:20:45These extra-thin French fries are delicious.

0:20:45 > 0:20:46They're so...

0:20:46 > 0:20:48so crisp.

0:20:48 > 0:20:51You should patent these. You could make some money.

0:20:51 > 0:20:54Sure, I'll get down to the patent office right away.

0:20:54 > 0:20:58I'm sure I'll make a fortune out of some deep-fried slivers of potato

0:20:58 > 0:21:00crisps. That will catch on!

0:21:03 > 0:21:06It's a good job we didn't tell him the soup wasn't very hot.

0:21:08 > 0:21:09Why, I oughta ...

0:21:09 > 0:21:10DISHES SMASHING

0:21:14 > 0:21:15Hey, I'm Alexander Graham Bell.

0:21:15 > 0:21:18And I want you to meet myPhone.

0:21:18 > 0:21:20myPhone is a new device that lets you talk to someone

0:21:20 > 0:21:22even when they are not in the same room.

0:21:22 > 0:21:24As long as they are in the room next door.

0:21:24 > 0:21:29Mr Watson, get in here, want to speak to you!

0:21:29 > 0:21:32- What?- myPhone is the most powerful,

0:21:32 > 0:21:35compact lightweight phone ever invented.

0:21:35 > 0:21:37Because it's the only phone ever invented.

0:21:37 > 0:21:39I wish you never had invented that stupid thing.

0:21:39 > 0:21:42What's that? It's not just for calls -

0:21:42 > 0:21:45use myPhone to find out what the weather is doing.

0:21:45 > 0:21:48Hey, what is the weather doing, then?

0:21:48 > 0:21:50I don't know.

0:21:51 > 0:21:53Enjoy the latest music.

0:21:59 > 0:22:01Be quiet!

0:22:01 > 0:22:04Play online games.

0:22:04 > 0:22:05Queen to King four. Check.

0:22:05 > 0:22:07I am trying to work!

0:22:08 > 0:22:11It's great in an emergency.

0:22:11 > 0:22:14Watson, my house is on fire!

0:22:15 > 0:22:17I wish it was, stop calling me.

0:22:17 > 0:22:19And that's not all myPhone can do.

0:22:21 > 0:22:22Actually, no, that is pretty much all it can do.

0:22:23 > 0:22:25I thought of something else it does.

0:22:25 > 0:22:26Yeah?

0:22:30 > 0:22:34New myPhone - now it's mobile, too!

0:22:36 > 0:22:38It's 1926 and all over,

0:22:38 > 0:22:40people are settling down in front of a brand-new invention that has just

0:22:40 > 0:22:43arrived in everyone's living room.

0:22:43 > 0:22:44What are we watching here?

0:22:44 > 0:22:48I don't know, I've never seen anything like it.

0:22:48 > 0:22:50I like it. I can see my reflection in it.

0:22:53 > 0:22:56Does it do anything else?

0:22:56 > 0:22:59This year, viewers got to see the very first television set.

0:22:59 > 0:23:01I don't see the point of it, mate.

0:23:01 > 0:23:03I think you're meant to flick that switch.

0:23:09 > 0:23:11- Oh.- Oh.

0:23:11 > 0:23:14Look, there's a picture coming up on the glass bit.

0:23:14 > 0:23:17One of the first things to be shown on television

0:23:17 > 0:23:21was a creepy ventriloquist dummy called Stooky Bill.

0:23:21 > 0:23:23It's like a weird ugly face.

0:23:23 > 0:23:26You sure that's not still your reflection?

0:23:26 > 0:23:30Television was the brainchild of a Scottish engineer

0:23:30 > 0:23:32called John Logie Baird.

0:23:32 > 0:23:35I have got lots of other inventions, too.

0:23:35 > 0:23:37The socks that go under your socks.

0:23:37 > 0:23:41My pneumatic shoes are pretty great.

0:23:41 > 0:23:43That brung him down a peg or two.

0:23:43 > 0:23:46- Yeah.- And of course, artificial diamonds.

0:23:46 > 0:23:48I love diamonds, man.

0:23:48 > 0:23:50They are pretty energy intensive.

0:23:50 > 0:23:51Turn up the generator.

0:23:51 > 0:23:53Higher.

0:23:56 > 0:23:59Glad that has happened. Rubbish, this television.

0:23:59 > 0:24:05See if you can get it working again, pet.

0:24:05 > 0:24:08From the wheel, to the printing press, to television -

0:24:08 > 0:24:12you humans have come up with some pretty incredible inventions,

0:24:12 > 0:24:16and all it has taken is hard work and ingenuity.

0:24:16 > 0:24:20And that is why I have come up with this...

0:24:22 > 0:24:24A sofa.

0:24:24 > 0:24:27Because all that inventing sounds like too much hard work

0:24:27 > 0:24:31and ingenuity, and I am going to need to sit down.

0:24:31 > 0:24:34So many inventions, it's exhausting.

0:26:54 > 0:26:56- Sorry. I hit him in the face. - I'm glad that that's not...

0:26:56 > 0:26:58That's happened.

0:26:58 > 0:27:01LAUGHTER

0:27:01 > 0:27:03# The past is no longer a mystery

0:27:03 > 0:27:08# Hope you enjoyed Horrible Histories. #