Catz N Doggz

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0:00:02 > 0:00:03Welcome to Hotel Trubble.

0:00:03 > 0:00:05Meet Sally, our reception.

0:00:05 > 0:00:08People, trying to have a conversation here?

0:00:08 > 0:00:09And this is Lenny.

0:00:09 > 0:00:11He's a man of many talents.

0:00:12 > 0:00:17This is Dolly. She's Mr Trubble's fiancee.

0:00:17 > 0:00:19And this is Mrs Poshington.

0:00:19 > 0:00:22The new cleaner. Which just leaves me. Jamie.

0:00:22 > 0:00:24I'm the bellboy.

0:00:24 > 0:00:27# Hotel Trubble forever

0:00:27 > 0:00:29# It's the pits and we know

0:00:29 > 0:00:32# We're stuck but we love it

0:00:32 > 0:00:34# Hotel Trubble forever

0:00:34 > 0:00:36# We're a team staying calm

0:00:36 > 0:00:37# Arm in arm

0:00:37 > 0:00:39# So the hotel survives

0:00:39 > 0:00:40# Trubble, Trubble

0:00:40 > 0:00:44# Keep the hotel alive! #

0:00:44 > 0:00:48- Lenny, have you fixed the Hoover yet? - There's still no suction.

0:00:48 > 0:00:51Listen, you need to make this place extra tidy today.

0:00:51 > 0:00:53We've got a special guest coming.

0:00:53 > 0:00:54D-Dog, the rapper.

0:00:54 > 0:00:57Oh, boy, I'm so excited, I'm so excited!

0:00:57 > 0:01:00Me too, I'm so excited, I feel like I've got ants in my pants.

0:01:00 > 0:01:04Oh, so that's where I left them.

0:01:04 > 0:01:07Earthquake! She's going to blow!

0:01:09 > 0:01:14Guys, please, D-Dog is not a special guest.

0:01:14 > 0:01:18So don't get star-struck and neglect the other residents.

0:01:18 > 0:01:21We need to treat all of our guests with good manners...

0:01:21 > 0:01:23PHONE RINGS

0:01:23 > 0:01:27..respect and, most importantly, friendliness.

0:01:29 > 0:01:31So... I'm talking here!

0:01:31 > 0:01:34Make sure you don't get carried away.

0:01:34 > 0:01:37Besides, D-Dog's the lucky one.

0:01:37 > 0:01:40He gets the stay at this wonderful hotel.

0:01:40 > 0:01:43I'm sure he's just as excited as you two are.

0:01:43 > 0:01:44No!

0:01:44 > 0:01:48I told you, anywhere but Hotel Trubble.

0:01:48 > 0:01:50What the heck do I pay you for?

0:01:50 > 0:01:53- I am sorry.- Stop saying sorry.

0:01:53 > 0:01:55OK, I will.

0:01:55 > 0:02:00Sorry. It's just all the other hotels refused to let you stay.

0:02:00 > 0:02:03- They say you're too much of a troublemaker.- I just get so bored.

0:02:03 > 0:02:07I know, but this is the only hotel left that you haven't upset.

0:02:07 > 0:02:11Please, I do beseech you, say you'll behave.

0:02:11 > 0:02:16Oh, I'll be-have. I'll 'be' very 'have' indeed.

0:02:16 > 0:02:19Do you think we can get out of this traffic jam?

0:02:19 > 0:02:23Look, all I'm saying is don't go gaga for D-Dog.

0:02:23 > 0:02:26Be professional, yeah? Like me.

0:02:26 > 0:02:30Like you? The only reason you have it in for cool people is because

0:02:30 > 0:02:33- you've always wanted to be one. - I have not.

0:02:33 > 0:02:35Always been the same, Jamie.

0:02:35 > 0:02:37Like when the cool kids were around at school.

0:02:40 > 0:02:44- All right, mate?- Hey, boys.

0:02:44 > 0:02:47OK, maybe once.

0:02:47 > 0:02:50Or, like it at bellboy college.

0:02:50 > 0:02:52Hi, guys.

0:02:52 > 0:02:55Just looking at the Hall of Fame.

0:02:55 > 0:02:57OK, twice, then.

0:02:57 > 0:03:01- Or...- All right! Get back to work.

0:03:01 > 0:03:05You can waste your time drooling all over this D-Dog character

0:03:05 > 0:03:08but I will be attending to our other guests

0:03:08 > 0:03:12and providing the level of service to which they've become accustomed.

0:03:12 > 0:03:14Because I will stop at nothing

0:03:14 > 0:03:18to maintain the comfort and well-being of all our guests.

0:03:18 > 0:03:19Are you OK?

0:03:19 > 0:03:22Sorry about that. He's an idiot.

0:03:27 > 0:03:28SHE SCREAMS

0:03:28 > 0:03:32- He's here. D-Dog.- Word.

0:03:32 > 0:03:34Such a pleasure to meet you.

0:03:34 > 0:03:37- Can I just say...?- Whatever.

0:03:37 > 0:03:39D-Dog, I'm Lenny.

0:03:39 > 0:03:41Please will you sign my CD?

0:03:49 > 0:03:51This is the last hotel that will have us, remember?

0:03:53 > 0:03:55You. Take my bags.

0:03:56 > 0:03:57What's the magic word?

0:03:57 > 0:04:02- PHONE RINGS - Abracadabra.- No. Say please.

0:04:02 > 0:04:04- Are you joking?- Not at all.

0:04:04 > 0:04:06I'm sure you're a very talented man.

0:04:06 > 0:04:10But we are Hotel Trubble. And we're not the sort of establishment

0:04:10 > 0:04:12that puts up with diva behaviour.

0:04:12 > 0:04:14Jamie, it's D-Dog's fan club.

0:04:14 > 0:04:16They've heard D-Dog's staying here.

0:04:16 > 0:04:18And they want to book 20 rooms!

0:04:18 > 0:04:20Can we fit them in?

0:04:20 > 0:04:22Let me take your bags.

0:04:25 > 0:04:29- Don't I need to say please? - Oh, really, that's not necessary.

0:04:29 > 0:04:31And may I just say what a pleasure it is

0:04:31 > 0:04:35to welcome such an accomplished musician to the hotel.

0:04:35 > 0:04:38Oh, a musician, eh?

0:04:38 > 0:04:41I was once a bit of a singer in my younger days.

0:04:41 > 0:04:43'Don't say "were you really?"'

0:04:43 > 0:04:45- 'Don't say "were you really?"' - Were you really?

0:04:47 > 0:04:51Well, seeing as you're interested,

0:04:51 > 0:04:52listen to this.

0:04:54 > 0:05:00# Can't live If living is without you

0:05:00 > 0:05:05# Can't live

0:05:05 > 0:05:10# Can't give any more

0:05:10 > 0:05:15# Can't live... # All together!

0:05:15 > 0:05:18if living is without you!

0:05:18 > 0:05:22# I can't give

0:05:22 > 0:05:27# I can't live any more! #

0:05:27 > 0:05:30Sorry? Reservation?

0:05:31 > 0:05:33Yes, what's your name?

0:05:35 > 0:05:38PHONE RINGS

0:05:42 > 0:05:45Hello, Hotel Trubble. Yep, 1pm's fine. Bye.

0:05:45 > 0:05:47Oh, this is brilliant. We've never been busier.

0:05:47 > 0:05:49Yeah, we know.

0:05:49 > 0:05:52I think it's best if I look after D-Dog, yeah?

0:05:52 > 0:05:55It's not like he's a normal guest, is it?

0:05:55 > 0:05:57- Yeah, but you said... - What did I say, Lenny?

0:05:59 > 0:06:02- Oh, I can't remember. - Sally, you can look after

0:06:02 > 0:06:06the first and second floor. Lenny, you take care of the third.

0:06:06 > 0:06:08Hang on, there isn't a third floor.

0:06:08 > 0:06:10Precisely. Anyway, you've still not fixed the Hoover.

0:06:10 > 0:06:12I'm still trying.

0:06:12 > 0:06:14It just needs a bit more power.

0:06:15 > 0:06:16Er...

0:06:16 > 0:06:20- What's that?- What, this? It's my cap.

0:06:20 > 0:06:21- I always wear it.- No, you don't.

0:06:21 > 0:06:23Why are you wearing it backwards?

0:06:23 > 0:06:26This is how I wear it, yeah? The cool way.

0:06:26 > 0:06:29I have never seen you wearing it before.

0:06:29 > 0:06:31You sure you're not just trying to copy D-Dog?

0:06:31 > 0:06:36- Me? Copying? I don't know the meaning of the...- Word.- Word.

0:06:36 > 0:06:38Oh, a cat.

0:06:38 > 0:06:41When you've got the Dog staying in your hotel, that's not cool.

0:06:41 > 0:06:44- I agree.- What?

0:06:44 > 0:06:45Dogs are much cooler than cats.

0:06:45 > 0:06:48- Always said that. - Eh? Since when?

0:06:48 > 0:06:50You sound like my kind of bro.

0:06:56 > 0:06:57Kick it!

0:07:07 > 0:07:09Everything all right with the hotel, sir?

0:07:09 > 0:07:12These cushions. They're made of goose feathers.

0:07:12 > 0:07:15- Why, what did you want?- Duck down.

0:07:15 > 0:07:18Anything you say, Mr Dog.

0:07:18 > 0:07:22No. I mean, I want you to get down.

0:07:22 > 0:07:24Get down?

0:07:24 > 0:07:26Of course. Why didn't you say so before?

0:07:26 > 0:07:29Get down it is.

0:07:33 > 0:07:36Is this guy for real? He's hilarious.

0:07:36 > 0:07:40This is all the entertainment I need. You know...

0:07:40 > 0:07:41we should hang out.

0:07:41 > 0:07:44Wow, sure.

0:07:44 > 0:07:47What are you up to? I hope aren't going to be mean to him.

0:07:47 > 0:07:50This guy does whatever I say. It's the best amusement I can think of.

0:07:50 > 0:07:54Just as long as you don't take the mickey, sir... Sorry.

0:07:54 > 0:07:56- Excuse me...- Get out.

0:07:56 > 0:07:59- Nice jeans.- Thanks.

0:07:59 > 0:08:04I like the way you wear them down around your bum. It's cool.

0:08:04 > 0:08:07I do the same. See?

0:08:07 > 0:08:11You know, really cool people wear them even lower than that.

0:08:11 > 0:08:14But, then, you probably know that already.

0:08:14 > 0:08:17I mean, yeah. Yeah, I do.

0:08:19 > 0:08:21How low?

0:08:36 > 0:08:40Jamie, just pull your pants up.

0:08:40 > 0:08:4327 hours and 4 minutes to go.

0:08:43 > 0:08:45No rush. I kind of like it here.

0:08:45 > 0:08:48Oh, I thought you were bored.

0:08:48 > 0:08:52This place is different. I've got my man Jamie to keep me company.

0:08:52 > 0:08:53Jamie!

0:08:53 > 0:08:55Yeah?

0:08:57 > 0:08:58Isn't that right, J?

0:08:58 > 0:09:02- Certainly is, Dog.- You know,

0:09:02 > 0:09:04I've been thinking.

0:09:04 > 0:09:08- Some of the guests of this hotel are seriously uncool.- Yeah?- Yeah.

0:09:08 > 0:09:13I mean, does a cool dude like you really want them staying here?

0:09:13 > 0:09:17Good point. 'Scuse me, bruv.

0:09:17 > 0:09:19Yes, I'd like to check in.

0:09:19 > 0:09:23Would you like to follow me, please, brother.

0:09:23 > 0:09:24OK, out we go.

0:09:24 > 0:09:26SMASH

0:09:26 > 0:09:28And see you later.

0:09:28 > 0:09:29Bye.

0:09:30 > 0:09:33Jamie, what's going on? Why are you acting differently?

0:09:33 > 0:09:37I'm just trying to make our special guest feel welcome.

0:09:37 > 0:09:40D-Dog's not a special guest, remember?

0:09:42 > 0:09:44Just because he's "cool"

0:09:44 > 0:09:47doesn't mean he's more important than any of our other guests.

0:09:47 > 0:09:50We need to treat them all with good manners, respect,

0:09:50 > 0:09:52and, most importantly, friendliness.

0:09:52 > 0:09:53PHONE RINGS

0:09:53 > 0:09:56I'm talking, here!

0:09:57 > 0:09:59You're just trying to act cool.

0:09:59 > 0:10:03You're just jealous because I'm to cool for school and I rule,

0:10:03 > 0:10:05- you fool.- Did you just call me a fool?

0:10:05 > 0:10:07My man. What are you?

0:10:07 > 0:10:10I'm the leader.

0:10:10 > 0:10:13You got it. Keep the L up, man.

0:10:13 > 0:10:16Yes, bro. See?

0:10:16 > 0:10:20Doesn't mean leader, Jamie, it means loser. He's making fun out of you.

0:10:20 > 0:10:23- Westlife.- It's "Westside".

0:10:23 > 0:10:25Jokes.

0:10:29 > 0:10:33Mr Dog, shouldn't you be getting to bed? It's the concert tomorrow.

0:10:33 > 0:10:36When I'm having this much fun? Jamie!

0:10:36 > 0:10:37Just watch this.

0:10:41 > 0:10:42Jay-mie!

0:10:42 > 0:10:46Why don't you show us how good you are at break dancing?

0:10:46 > 0:10:47- Sure.- Yeah.

0:10:47 > 0:10:52# Rhythm is a dancer It's a source of passion

0:10:52 > 0:10:56# You can feel it everywhere... #

0:10:56 > 0:10:58- Don't hurt yourself now. - RIP

0:10:58 > 0:11:00He's such an idiot.

0:11:02 > 0:11:05Don't choke yourself, now. Oh, man!

0:11:05 > 0:11:10Oh, we need to find a way to show Jamie that he's being laughed at.

0:11:10 > 0:11:12We need to prove it to him.

0:11:12 > 0:11:14And I know just what to do.

0:11:14 > 0:11:16I've seen it in the movies. Come on.

0:11:20 > 0:11:22And, what's the plan?

0:11:22 > 0:11:26We simply wait here until D-Dog says something rude about Jamie.

0:11:26 > 0:11:30And when he does, we secretly record it using this tape recorder.

0:11:30 > 0:11:32But it has to be completely secret,

0:11:32 > 0:11:34otherwise D-Dog will never give himself away.

0:11:35 > 0:11:41- Right. Well, shouldn't we be on the other side of the door, then?- What?

0:11:43 > 0:11:44Oh, yeah.

0:11:46 > 0:11:50MISSION IMPOSSIBLE THEME

0:11:54 > 0:11:57What are we doing here again?

0:11:57 > 0:11:59This is my fool-proof plan.

0:11:59 > 0:12:02We're in the hotel ventilation system.

0:12:02 > 0:12:05Directly above D-Dog's room.

0:12:06 > 0:12:09Right.

0:12:09 > 0:12:12All we do is use a hammer.

0:12:12 > 0:12:17And a nail. And we make a little hole right here.

0:12:17 > 0:12:19And we film whatever goes on with this camera.

0:12:19 > 0:12:21Wait a minute, are you sure this is safe?

0:12:21 > 0:12:23Oh, for goodness' sake, Lenny!

0:12:23 > 0:12:26We're only going to make a tiny, tiny hole. Watch.

0:12:30 > 0:12:31See?

0:12:31 > 0:12:33CREAKING

0:12:36 > 0:12:37BOTH: Argh!

0:12:40 > 0:12:41Ow.

0:12:47 > 0:12:50Oh, man. I'm looking phat.

0:12:50 > 0:12:52- A bit thick around the middle.- What?

0:12:52 > 0:12:55We all put on a bit of weight sometimes.

0:12:55 > 0:12:56No, not fat.

0:12:56 > 0:12:58Phat.

0:12:58 > 0:13:01P-H-A-T. It means good.

0:13:01 > 0:13:03I'm looking good.

0:13:03 > 0:13:05Man, you're rude.

0:13:05 > 0:13:08- Sorry.- No. Rude as in good.

0:13:08 > 0:13:10Don't you know anything?

0:13:10 > 0:13:12Rude, phat, bad, sick, dope.

0:13:12 > 0:13:15- It means good.- I see.

0:13:15 > 0:13:19So, in the world of rap music, bad words are good.

0:13:19 > 0:13:21Rude, phat, bad.

0:13:21 > 0:13:23- They mean cool.- Yeah.

0:13:23 > 0:13:26Ah, that is cool. No, no, no, no.

0:13:26 > 0:13:28I mean, that is rubbish.

0:13:30 > 0:13:32You still got that stupid cat?

0:13:32 > 0:13:35- Dogs rule, man.- Woman.- What?

0:13:35 > 0:13:37I'm not a man, I'm a woman.

0:13:37 > 0:13:40- You need glasses.- Whatever.

0:13:40 > 0:13:43Just get rid of that stupid thing.

0:13:43 > 0:13:44Grrrr!

0:13:44 > 0:13:47- Arrr!- Woof!- ARRR!- Rarr!

0:13:47 > 0:13:48That's better, man.

0:13:48 > 0:13:51- D-Dog. D-Dog, they're here.- Who?

0:13:51 > 0:13:55TV crew. Got an interview with MTVV.

0:13:55 > 0:13:58Oh my giddie yarn. That is so cool.

0:13:58 > 0:14:01You're going to be speaking to them live from Hotel Trubble.

0:14:01 > 0:14:04Yes. So, if you could leave us now, that would be...

0:14:04 > 0:14:07You know,

0:14:07 > 0:14:09why don't you do it with me?

0:14:09 > 0:14:12You can get great publicity for the hotel and we can also show the world

0:14:12 > 0:14:14what great bros we really are.

0:14:14 > 0:14:16What do you say?

0:14:16 > 0:14:19Ohhh!

0:14:19 > 0:14:22Oh, man, this guy is too funny.

0:14:22 > 0:14:24Hey, people. We are here with

0:14:24 > 0:14:29superstar rap artist, D-Dog, here at his hotel. How's it hanging, Dog?

0:14:29 > 0:14:30I'm cool, Gemma, how are you?

0:14:30 > 0:14:34- Yeah, I'm good, thanks.- Yo, let me introduce you to my man, Jamie.

0:14:34 > 0:14:36- Hey, hey, hey. - He's the bellboy of the hotel.

0:14:36 > 0:14:38And he is phat.

0:14:40 > 0:14:43Yeah. Yeah, I am.

0:14:43 > 0:14:45So, tell everybody, what's the hotel like?

0:14:45 > 0:14:49Oh, man, the hotel is rubbish.

0:14:49 > 0:14:51- Really?- Yep.

0:14:51 > 0:14:53What's the staff like, yo?

0:14:53 > 0:14:57Oh, Gem-cakes, the staff are useless.

0:14:57 > 0:14:59Yo, what's the food like, yo?

0:14:59 > 0:15:02The food will make you sick.

0:15:02 > 0:15:05OK. We'll be right back.

0:15:07 > 0:15:09Yo. I'll catch you later, man.

0:15:14 > 0:15:18This has to be the greatest day of my...

0:15:18 > 0:15:21Jamie, watch out!

0:15:21 > 0:15:24- What you doing?- Trying to kick you.

0:15:24 > 0:15:27Just because I'm in D-Dog's crew

0:15:27 > 0:15:30and you two aren't, there's no need to resort to violence, yeah?

0:15:30 > 0:15:32I'm just doing what the sign says.

0:15:32 > 0:15:34What sign?

0:15:37 > 0:15:38Kick it!

0:15:38 > 0:15:43That guy is so funny. He does whatever I tell him.

0:15:43 > 0:15:46He's stupid.

0:15:46 > 0:15:49It's OK, I think stupid means really good.

0:15:49 > 0:15:51He's got no idea what's cool and what isn't.

0:15:51 > 0:15:53He doesn't know what he's saying.

0:15:53 > 0:15:57He thinks all bad words are good. I haven't laughed this much in years.

0:15:57 > 0:15:59D-DOG LAUGHS

0:16:09 > 0:16:11Rub my back! Rub my back!

0:16:14 > 0:16:16Guys, I'm really sorry.

0:16:16 > 0:16:20You were right all along. He was just laughing at me.

0:16:20 > 0:16:23- I feel such a fool.- Really?

0:16:23 > 0:16:26You don't...look like one.

0:16:26 > 0:16:29Hey, it's OK, we all make mistakes.

0:16:29 > 0:16:33I once got my hairspray muddled up with grizzly bear love potion.

0:16:33 > 0:16:34# She's the one... #

0:16:34 > 0:16:42Smelly, fishy, pooey, dirty river water by John Paul Goatey-breath.

0:16:42 > 0:16:44Bear your soul.

0:16:44 > 0:16:47Yeah, and I once stored six tons of dynamite in the dining room.

0:16:47 > 0:16:51Oh, no, wait, that was this morning.

0:16:53 > 0:16:59- Sorry.- I can't believe I've been made such a fool of.

0:16:59 > 0:17:02D-DOG LAUGHING

0:17:09 > 0:17:14It's time to give D-Dog a piece of my mind.

0:17:17 > 0:17:19- Yeah!- Go on, Jamie!

0:17:19 > 0:17:2421 hours to go then we can do this concert and I can go home.

0:17:26 > 0:17:28Oi!

0:17:28 > 0:17:29I mean, hi.

0:17:31 > 0:17:36I was wondering if it would be all right if you stopped laughing at me?

0:17:36 > 0:17:39Or just cut down a bit.

0:17:39 > 0:17:40Or not.

0:17:40 > 0:17:46Up to you. Thanks.

0:17:46 > 0:17:48What I mean it is...

0:17:48 > 0:17:51I think you've been a bit mean. I wanted you to know.

0:17:53 > 0:17:59And, actually, you owe me an apology, buster!

0:17:59 > 0:18:04You might think you're the big cheese, but this is our hotel, yeah?

0:18:04 > 0:18:08And what we say goes.

0:18:08 > 0:18:11So you'd better buck up your ideas, buddy boy, or you'll be

0:18:11 > 0:18:15kicked out of this place faster than you can say "word", got it?

0:18:15 > 0:18:16Whoa!

0:18:16 > 0:18:17What did you say?

0:18:17 > 0:18:19He said you are the big cheese...

0:18:19 > 0:18:21I heard what he said.

0:18:21 > 0:18:22MUSIC: "In Da Club" by 50 Cent

0:18:22 > 0:18:24- You can kick us out if you want. - What?

0:18:24 > 0:18:28But if you were real, man, you want to sort this out, man to man.

0:18:28 > 0:18:31I'll battle you, tomorrow night, in the lobby.

0:18:31 > 0:18:34- But the concert! - Let everyone come here instead.

0:18:34 > 0:18:36I want everyone to see this.

0:18:36 > 0:18:39You got it.

0:18:39 > 0:18:41Just don't make me angry,

0:18:41 > 0:18:43cos you wouldn't like me when I'm angry.

0:18:43 > 0:18:45- I don't like you anyway.- Fair point.

0:18:45 > 0:18:47Until tomorrow, then.

0:18:47 > 0:18:50Just don't start crying if I hit you too hard, though, yeah?

0:18:53 > 0:18:54Ow.

0:19:05 > 0:19:07This was a bad idea, wasn't it?

0:19:07 > 0:19:10He's much bigger than me. He'll eat me for breakfast.

0:19:10 > 0:19:12No, he won't. Not at that time.

0:19:12 > 0:19:14If anything, he'll eat you for dinner.

0:19:14 > 0:19:15Not helping, Lenny.

0:19:15 > 0:19:17I need to get in training, you know.

0:19:17 > 0:19:20Build some muscle. Oh, what am I going to do?

0:19:20 > 0:19:23You're forgetting that I'm a professional boxing trainer

0:19:23 > 0:19:26and I've trained no less than...

0:19:27 > 0:19:29..ten world champions.

0:19:29 > 0:19:33Oh, you're thinking of a dream again, aren't you, Lenny?

0:19:33 > 0:19:34Am I?

0:19:34 > 0:19:36Oh.

0:19:36 > 0:19:39So, does that mean I didn't invent a banana that can walk?

0:19:39 > 0:19:42Oh, well. We'd better start training.

0:19:50 > 0:19:53- Feel the burn.- Ow, ow.

0:19:55 > 0:19:57- I'm not ready for it!- Come on!

0:20:00 > 0:20:01Let's do it, come on.

0:20:06 > 0:20:09Go on. Yes.

0:20:10 > 0:20:12Come on.

0:20:13 > 0:20:15Come on! Yes!

0:20:15 > 0:20:18Nice Work, Jamie.

0:20:29 > 0:20:31I am so proud.

0:20:37 > 0:20:41VACUUM CLEANER SUCKS

0:20:42 > 0:20:44Meow.

0:21:00 > 0:21:01Sirius?

0:21:05 > 0:21:07Sirius?

0:21:07 > 0:21:11Sirius, where are you? Sirius.

0:21:11 > 0:21:13Why are you wearing that?

0:21:13 > 0:21:19My Sirius is gone. This isn't like him. He must be dead.

0:21:19 > 0:21:21Don't be so hysterical.

0:21:21 > 0:21:23He'll be around somewhere.

0:21:23 > 0:21:24I'm sure we can find him.

0:21:24 > 0:21:26Good luck.

0:21:28 > 0:21:30I'm sure WE can find him.

0:21:30 > 0:21:34- That means all of us.- Oh.

0:21:34 > 0:21:37Sirius, where are you? Sirius?

0:21:37 > 0:21:43# Can I kick it? Yes, you can. Can I kick it? Yes, you can... #

0:21:46 > 0:21:49- You look ridiculous, man. - Oh, thanks. I mean, hey!

0:21:49 > 0:21:52How you going to hold a microphone with gloves on?

0:21:52 > 0:21:55What are you talking about? we're having a fight.

0:21:55 > 0:21:57No. We're having a battle.

0:21:57 > 0:22:00- What's the difference? - He means a rap battle.

0:22:00 > 0:22:04It's a contest in which two people take it in turns to rap

0:22:04 > 0:22:08- and then the crowd decide who wins. - Oh.

0:22:08 > 0:22:10Oh.

0:22:10 > 0:22:12Just one minute, please.

0:22:12 > 0:22:15Lenny, how long have you known this?

0:22:15 > 0:22:18- Ages.- And you didn't think it was weird that I spent all of yesterday

0:22:18 > 0:22:20bulking up my muscles for a fight?

0:22:20 > 0:22:22Yeah, I did a bit.

0:22:22 > 0:22:25But, you can win this, easily.

0:22:25 > 0:22:28Lenny, this man is a professional rapper.

0:22:28 > 0:22:29I can't wrap a Christmas present.

0:22:29 > 0:22:31Oh, come on, how hard can it be?

0:22:35 > 0:22:40- Here, kitty, kitty.- It's no good.

0:22:40 > 0:22:42There's no sign of him.

0:22:42 > 0:22:43Look on the bright side.

0:22:43 > 0:22:47If he has passed away, his fur would make a lovely shrug.

0:22:47 > 0:22:50You could probably turn him into a whole fur coat,

0:22:50 > 0:22:53- the amount you used to feed him. - Dolly!

0:22:53 > 0:22:55I'm only teasing.

0:22:55 > 0:22:59Mrs P, did Sirius carry an organ donor card, by the way,

0:22:59 > 0:23:03because the road outside could do with a new pair of cat's eyes.

0:23:03 > 0:23:06No one talks about my Sirius like that.

0:23:06 > 0:23:09Here, kitty, kitty, kitty.

0:23:09 > 0:23:11# Kick it! #

0:23:13 > 0:23:15Dolly, are you OK?

0:23:17 > 0:23:18This is D-Dog's room.

0:23:18 > 0:23:20- Oh...- My...

0:23:20 > 0:23:22- Goodness. - WHINING

0:23:23 > 0:23:26OK. Here are the rules.

0:23:26 > 0:23:29Both sides have 30 seconds to rap at the other.

0:23:29 > 0:23:31- I presume you've brought your own music.- Yep.

0:23:31 > 0:23:33- Nope.- Great.

0:23:33 > 0:23:36Let's begin. D-Dog first.

0:23:38 > 0:23:40Yo. Check it. Yo, yo, yo

0:23:40 > 0:23:43I wanna tell you 'bout a dude who's a total fool.

0:23:43 > 0:23:45He's just a lonely bellboy who thinks he's cool

0:23:45 > 0:23:48He dresses like me and copies how I talk

0:23:48 > 0:23:50He's not a D-Dog He's more like D-dork

0:23:50 > 0:23:53I'd love to stay in here in Hotel Trubble

0:23:53 > 0:23:54You make me laugh so much, I even pay you double

0:23:54 > 0:23:57He thinks he's someone I want in my crew

0:23:57 > 0:24:00But I've got loads of friends and none of them are you. Word.

0:24:00 > 0:24:02CHEERING

0:24:02 > 0:24:06OK, ladies and gentlemen, please welcome James.

0:24:06 > 0:24:10Right, just remember, nothing rhymes with the words orange, or purple.

0:24:10 > 0:24:13- So just make sure you don't use them.- Got it.

0:24:21 > 0:24:23Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

0:24:23 > 0:24:26Drop the beat. Drop the beat, drop the beat, drop the beat

0:24:26 > 0:24:28My name is Jamie and I love orange...

0:24:30 > 0:24:33I love this hotel but I don't like...

0:24:33 > 0:24:35Blorange.

0:24:39 > 0:24:42I mustn't say purple because nothing rhymes with purple

0:24:42 > 0:24:44Except...the gurple

0:24:44 > 0:24:46Yeah.

0:24:46 > 0:24:47- Boo!- Boo!- Boo!

0:24:51 > 0:24:59Yo. His name is D-Dog but he's actually not a dog, so there.

0:25:00 > 0:25:02Yeah.

0:25:03 > 0:25:05You can quit if you want.

0:25:05 > 0:25:07I know how much you hate to embarrass yourself.

0:25:07 > 0:25:10Feel free just to say, "I quit".

0:25:13 > 0:25:17- I...- There he is.- Huh?

0:25:18 > 0:25:21You can take the mickey out of me and Lenny,

0:25:21 > 0:25:24and you can laugh at the hotel, but you've taken it too far this time.

0:25:24 > 0:25:28- I don't know what you mean. - We've been in your room, buster,

0:25:28 > 0:25:30and look what we found.

0:25:30 > 0:25:33What have you done to my cat?

0:25:33 > 0:25:35You've blinged him.

0:25:35 > 0:25:36So, I didn't hoover him up!

0:25:36 > 0:25:38You stole him!

0:25:38 > 0:25:40What can I say? Dogs rule around here, yo.

0:25:40 > 0:25:44Oh, really, well, we'll see about that, won't we?

0:25:44 > 0:25:47Right, OK, gang, hit me with some beats.

0:25:49 > 0:25:52You looked down on me Cos you think I'm a cleaner

0:25:52 > 0:25:54But when it comes to battle No-one is meaner

0:25:54 > 0:25:59This guy thinks he's tough But under his bed, what did I find?

0:25:59 > 0:26:00A cuddly ted.

0:26:00 > 0:26:04So don't be impressed with his so-called talents

0:26:04 > 0:26:09He's not called D-Dog His real name is Clarence.

0:26:09 > 0:26:11The Mrs P massive's in the house

0:26:11 > 0:26:14So join with me if you want him out

0:26:14 > 0:26:17When I say hot, you say pan

0:26:17 > 0:26:20When I say spick, you say span. Hot.

0:26:20 > 0:26:21- Pan.- Spick.- Span.

0:26:21 > 0:26:23- Hot.- Pan.- Spick.

0:26:23 > 0:26:26- Span.- H to the O to the T-E-L

0:26:26 > 0:26:29Trubble's our name And we're gonna give him hell

0:26:29 > 0:26:33So guys, make noise If you want him to stay

0:26:35 > 0:26:38There's your answer. Now, go away

0:26:38 > 0:26:39Word.

0:26:39 > 0:26:41CHEERING

0:26:54 > 0:26:56Where did you learn all that?

0:26:56 > 0:26:59I spent a couple of years running

0:26:59 > 0:27:03with some of the East Coast rappers in the US of A.

0:27:03 > 0:27:06- Back in the day.- Who? Which ones?

0:27:06 > 0:27:10No, one must never name-drop.

0:27:10 > 0:27:13Simon Cowell once taught me that.

0:27:13 > 0:27:17Here, I reckon we could make this a regular thing.

0:27:17 > 0:27:19I'm a bit of a whizz on the mic, well,

0:27:19 > 0:27:21I am more of a singer. As I say...

0:27:23 > 0:27:26One, two. One, two.

0:27:26 > 0:27:33# I can't live If living is without you

0:27:33 > 0:27:42# I can't live I can't give any more... #

0:27:42 > 0:27:45# Hotel Trubble forever

0:27:45 > 0:27:47# It's the pits and we know

0:27:47 > 0:27:50# We're stuck but we love it

0:27:50 > 0:27:52# Hotel Trubble forever

0:27:52 > 0:27:54# We're a team staying calm

0:27:54 > 0:27:55# Arm in arm

0:27:55 > 0:27:57# So the hotel survives

0:27:57 > 0:27:58# Trubble, Trubble

0:27:58 > 0:28:00# Keep the hotel alive! #

0:28:00 > 0:28:02E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk