One Zillion

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0:00:02 > 0:00:03- What's on TV?- Flea yak show.

0:00:03 > 0:00:05Where two yaks watch paint dry?

0:00:05 > 0:00:07- LAUGHS - What a waste of time!

0:00:07 > 0:00:10Well, I find it very relaxing.

0:00:10 > 0:00:13You know, you've got the worst taste in TV, Red.

0:00:13 > 0:00:18Every day I walk by you have an even stupider reality TV show on!

0:00:18 > 0:00:20- Hey, it just got drier.- Oh, it did?

0:00:20 > 0:00:25- It just got drier and you totally missed it.- Oh, no!

0:00:25 > 0:00:28Come on. Dry, baby, dry!

0:00:30 > 0:00:32MANIACAL LAUGHTER, STOPS SUDDENLY

0:00:32 > 0:00:33He-he!

0:00:33 > 0:00:36Huh? Ahh!

0:00:58 > 0:01:01Out of my way or I shall destroy you!

0:01:01 > 0:01:02Can't we just talk about it?

0:01:02 > 0:01:06You're right, communication is always the best solution.

0:01:06 > 0:01:10Um...what's with all the stupid dolls?

0:01:10 > 0:01:14These aren't dolls. These are collectible, limited edition

0:01:14 > 0:01:16ultra-popular action figures!

0:01:16 > 0:01:18Don't you recognise them?

0:01:18 > 0:01:21Um, er... Yes, sure I do.

0:01:21 > 0:01:25He hasn't seen Captain Bubbles and the Freedom Police! Huh!

0:01:25 > 0:01:28I bet you don't even get the TV channel it's on.

0:01:28 > 0:01:29THEY ALL LAUGH

0:01:31 > 0:01:33We get the channel. We get, er...

0:01:33 > 0:01:35We get...lots of channels.

0:01:35 > 0:01:37So what channel is it?

0:01:37 > 0:01:39Um, I don't quite remember right now.

0:01:39 > 0:01:43You can't remember it's on Channel 62?

0:01:43 > 0:01:45Channel 62?!

0:01:45 > 0:01:47We don't get Channel 62.

0:01:47 > 0:01:49Yes, we do. We get all 62 channels.

0:01:49 > 0:01:51THEY LAUGH

0:01:51 > 0:01:54There's more channels than that!

0:01:55 > 0:01:57Exactly! I know that.

0:01:57 > 0:01:59I've only been testing you

0:01:59 > 0:02:02in order to see what pathetic number of channels you have.

0:02:02 > 0:02:05We have all the channels!

0:02:05 > 0:02:07One...zillion channels!

0:02:07 > 0:02:10THUNDER CLAPS, LAUGHS MANIACALLY

0:02:10 > 0:02:12It looks like it's gonna rain.

0:02:12 > 0:02:15I didn't know we had one zillion channels.

0:02:15 > 0:02:18Yes, we do! We have one zillion TV channels.

0:02:18 > 0:02:20Prove it - let's see them.

0:02:20 > 0:02:22Er, tomorrow, at dawn.

0:02:22 > 0:02:27You and your wormy little minions will bow down in awe

0:02:27 > 0:02:31when you see my one zillion channels.

0:02:33 > 0:02:34Ohh.

0:02:34 > 0:02:36THUNDER RUMBLES

0:02:40 > 0:02:42Er, this could be difficult.

0:02:42 > 0:02:44But not out of the question.

0:02:44 > 0:02:48You see, one zillion is more than an umpteen and a gazillion.

0:02:48 > 0:02:51Though not as much as a bazillion.

0:02:51 > 0:02:54It's a very difficult number to count to.

0:02:54 > 0:02:56How do we know when we have a zillion channels?

0:02:56 > 0:02:57With this!

0:02:57 > 0:03:01When the needle hits the big TV you've got a zillion channels!

0:03:01 > 0:03:02Easy!

0:03:02 > 0:03:05Oh, that's awesome, Doktor Frogg.

0:03:05 > 0:03:07But I think you inverted

0:03:07 > 0:03:10- your multi-variable diagonal matrix logarithm.- Eh?!

0:03:13 > 0:03:14Little higher.

0:03:14 > 0:03:16Higher!

0:03:16 > 0:03:18How's that?

0:03:22 > 0:03:25A little more to the right and the picture will be ours!

0:03:29 > 0:03:31Gah! Ah!

0:03:31 > 0:03:32I need more right!

0:03:35 > 0:03:36Hi, Doomageddon!

0:03:36 > 0:03:37Aaaah!

0:03:37 > 0:03:38CRASH!

0:03:41 > 0:03:42Perfect!

0:03:44 > 0:03:45That's it.

0:03:45 > 0:03:48We only have one channel?!

0:03:48 > 0:03:49Hi, Voltar. What's on?

0:03:49 > 0:03:52It looks like two yaks watching paint dry.

0:03:52 > 0:03:54I love that show!

0:03:54 > 0:03:56I've all the action figures,

0:03:56 > 0:04:00they have kung fu hooves and realistic eye blinking action!

0:04:00 > 0:04:02What colour are they watching today?!

0:04:04 > 0:04:09In order to get to one zillion, we'll need more than one channel.

0:04:09 > 0:04:12So, this is my evil plan.

0:04:12 > 0:04:16We are going to get Steve's cable box!

0:04:16 > 0:04:17Yeah, but...

0:04:17 > 0:04:22Perfect for my newest invention, a cable box tractor beam.

0:04:29 > 0:04:30I've got a bite!

0:04:30 > 0:04:33But I've already got Steve's cable box.

0:04:33 > 0:04:37Yeah, he said I could borrow it while he's away.

0:04:37 > 0:04:40But if you have the cable box, then...

0:04:40 > 0:04:42What's on the end of my tractor beam?

0:04:44 > 0:04:45Oh!

0:04:45 > 0:04:48I didn't know we had farms around here!

0:04:48 > 0:04:50# League of super evil! #

0:04:50 > 0:04:52It's just what I feared.

0:04:52 > 0:04:53We are going to need

0:04:53 > 0:04:57a quad-band roto asamit duo synchronist TV satellite.

0:04:57 > 0:04:59I LOVE satellites!

0:04:59 > 0:05:03You see, satellites feed nations with their TV programming.

0:05:03 > 0:05:06There are billions of channels out in space,

0:05:06 > 0:05:09some say even a zillion of them

0:05:09 > 0:05:13all fed by this massive array of metal which hangs over the earth.

0:05:13 > 0:05:17If we were to capture all the satellites and modify them

0:05:17 > 0:05:21then their beams could be reversed to take over the world!

0:05:21 > 0:05:23Ah, yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever.

0:05:23 > 0:05:26But, we get a zillion channels too, right?

0:05:26 > 0:05:29Uh, yes, we get a zillion channels too.

0:05:29 > 0:05:31Perfect! Wah-ha-ha!

0:05:31 > 0:05:33Get me those satellites

0:05:33 > 0:05:36and I shall be victorious!

0:05:36 > 0:05:39I have just the thing.

0:05:39 > 0:05:44I've been saving this for a special occasion!

0:05:47 > 0:05:49I must fix that.

0:05:55 > 0:05:57Wow!

0:05:58 > 0:06:01Our very own rocket ship.

0:06:01 > 0:06:04That can be in orbit in 3.2 seconds!

0:06:04 > 0:06:06Stand aside, Frogg.

0:06:06 > 0:06:10I'll be hogging the outer space glory on this mission!

0:06:10 > 0:06:12Oh, OK...

0:06:14 > 0:06:15Huh?

0:06:16 > 0:06:20On second thought, Frogg, it's all yours.

0:06:20 > 0:06:22Yes!

0:06:27 > 0:06:28ENGINE PURRS

0:06:28 > 0:06:31Arrivederci, baby!

0:06:32 > 0:06:34What do I get to do?

0:06:34 > 0:06:37Stand right there.

0:06:37 > 0:06:40Whoa! Aaah...

0:06:40 > 0:06:42Ouch.

0:06:42 > 0:06:45Woo-hoo! Aaah!

0:06:47 > 0:06:50HE SCREAMS

0:06:50 > 0:06:51Please, don't!

0:06:51 > 0:06:53Aaah!

0:06:53 > 0:06:57- CAR ALARMS BEEP - Yes! Victory shall be mine!

0:07:01 > 0:07:05Whoa! That's better than TV.

0:07:05 > 0:07:07Aaaah!

0:07:08 > 0:07:10Oh...

0:07:10 > 0:07:12Ground Control to Major Frogg...

0:07:12 > 0:07:17- How's it going up there? - Just about to focus the first...

0:07:17 > 0:07:18OW!

0:07:18 > 0:07:20..satellite.

0:07:20 > 0:07:22You should have a signal now.

0:07:29 > 0:07:31It's working, it's working!

0:07:31 > 0:07:34Ha-ha-ha-ha!

0:07:34 > 0:07:38Total world domination will be mine!

0:07:38 > 0:07:40Mwa-ha-ha! Mwa-ha-ha-ha!

0:07:46 > 0:07:47Aaah!

0:07:49 > 0:07:51D'oh!

0:08:08 > 0:08:10HE SNORES

0:08:10 > 0:08:14Hurry up, Frogg. Those snot-nosed kids'll be here soon!

0:08:21 > 0:08:25Yes! Ha-ha-ha-ha. One billion channels!

0:08:25 > 0:08:28Mwa-ha-ha-ha!

0:08:28 > 0:08:33And now that the satellites are ours, I can modify the beams

0:08:33 > 0:08:35and control the world!

0:08:35 > 0:08:37- DOORBELL RINGS - Quick. Red.

0:08:37 > 0:08:38They're here!

0:08:38 > 0:08:43Major Frogg to Ground Control. Turn to channel 4,543

0:08:43 > 0:08:50and take the volume to maximum. The world will be ours!

0:08:50 > 0:08:54Not now, Dr Frogg. I've got snot-nosed kids

0:08:54 > 0:08:57to awe into submission.

0:08:57 > 0:08:59Voltar, are you there?!

0:08:59 > 0:09:02D'oh! I'll have to do it manually.

0:09:08 > 0:09:13Look upon my work and despair.

0:09:13 > 0:09:14Behold!

0:09:14 > 0:09:18One zillion channels!

0:09:27 > 0:09:29Ha!

0:09:41 > 0:09:42Enough! You win. You win!

0:09:42 > 0:09:45Make it stop! Make it stop!

0:09:47 > 0:09:49Mwa-ha-ha-ha!

0:09:49 > 0:09:51DOORBELL RINGS

0:09:51 > 0:09:52Huh?

0:09:53 > 0:09:55Yeah, I'm looking for a Voltar.

0:09:55 > 0:10:01Go ahead! Feast your eyes and bow down to me!

0:10:04 > 0:10:07Actually, I'm with the TV Satellite company.

0:10:07 > 0:10:12For a zillion channels, we're gonna need a payment in advance.

0:10:12 > 0:10:16One zillion dollars? WHAT?!

0:10:16 > 0:10:19I don't have a zillion dollars!

0:10:19 > 0:10:23Well, no zillion dollars, no zillion channels.

0:10:24 > 0:10:26Nooooo!

0:10:26 > 0:10:27Huh?!

0:10:27 > 0:10:30No! Wait! What just happened?

0:10:30 > 0:10:32Boring. I'm going home.

0:10:32 > 0:10:35Don't leave. I'll get the zillion channels back.

0:10:35 > 0:10:39Nah. Even with a zillion channels, there's still nothing to watch.

0:10:39 > 0:10:43- I'm gonna read a book.- No!

0:10:43 > 0:10:46It's OK, Voltar. We still get the one channel.

0:10:46 > 0:10:48That's a victory, huh?

0:10:48 > 0:10:51I wonder how Frogg's gonna get home.

0:10:55 > 0:10:59Oh...I knew this was going to be too short.

0:10:59 > 0:11:01Stupid, stupid, stupid Frogg!

0:11:01 > 0:11:04Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:11:06 > 0:11:10E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk