Who's Been Eating My Porridge?

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0:00:01 > 0:00:02OK.

0:00:02 > 0:00:05Run it past me just one more time.

0:00:05 > 0:00:06SIGHS

0:00:06 > 0:00:10Right. Our computer, who is called Mother,

0:00:10 > 0:00:13and who thinks she's my mother, isn't my mum.

0:00:13 > 0:00:16The woman who's coming round this afternoon,

0:00:16 > 0:00:20the one I call my mum, IS my actual mother.

0:00:20 > 0:00:22Your mother isn't a computer?

0:00:22 > 0:00:25How does that work, then?

0:00:25 > 0:00:29All you need to know is you've got to be on your best behaviour.

0:00:29 > 0:00:32What does computer mother think about it?

0:00:32 > 0:00:37Mum and mother don't get on. They always try and out-mum each other.

0:00:37 > 0:00:40- Is that why Mother's made us packed lunches all week?- Yeah.

0:00:40 > 0:00:45- And darned the holes in our socks. - Language!- No darned means sewn up.

0:00:45 > 0:00:47She's sewn up the holes in our socks.

0:00:47 > 0:00:50So that's why I couldn't get my feet in!

0:00:53 > 0:00:56Hello, Mother! We're back!

0:00:56 > 0:01:00Hello, boys! Your porridge is cooling down, Howard.

0:01:00 > 0:01:02Big Howard, yours is still in the pot.

0:01:02 > 0:01:06Hang on! Who's been sitting in my chair?

0:01:06 > 0:01:10- I can clearly see two buttock marks in my cushion.- Howard,

0:01:10 > 0:01:15no-one would break in to the house just to sit in your chair!

0:01:15 > 0:01:17And there's no porridge in here!

0:01:17 > 0:01:23- Someone has eaten it!- There's plenty more. I made eight gallons.

0:01:23 > 0:01:27There's enough porridge here to swim in. Or submerge your head in.

0:01:27 > 0:01:29KLAXON

0:01:29 > 0:01:33I, Little Howard, have come up with one of my BIG questions.

0:01:33 > 0:01:36Who has been eating my porridge?

0:01:39 > 0:01:44I do wish you wouldn't... Ooh, needs some more nutmeg.

0:01:44 > 0:01:46KLAXON

0:01:46 > 0:01:48- # We love porridge - We love porridge

0:01:48 > 0:01:49- # We love porridge - We love porridge

0:01:49 > 0:01:52# Oh, that lovely-wubbly, lumpy-wumpy porridge

0:01:52 > 0:01:53- #- Wumpy porridge

0:01:53 > 0:01:54- # With its milk - With its milk

0:01:54 > 0:01:56- # And its oats - And its oats

0:01:56 > 0:01:57# I think that if we all ate porridge

0:01:57 > 0:01:59# We'd have lovely glossy coats

0:01:59 > 0:02:01- # Give us porridge - We love porridge

0:02:01 > 0:02:05# Lots of porridge, you know that it's the porridge we adore

0:02:05 > 0:02:08# If my love said that she did not love the porridge

0:02:08 > 0:02:11# I wouldn't love her any more

0:02:11 > 0:02:12# Thank you very much! #

0:02:12 > 0:02:15GROWLING

0:02:17 > 0:02:21Ooh, that reminds me of something.

0:02:21 > 0:02:24I think it might have been a horror film I saw. Wait.

0:02:24 > 0:02:28Where are you going? Look at the mess! Today of all days!

0:02:28 > 0:02:30Leave it to Mother, Muggins.

0:02:30 > 0:02:34Oh, that mad woman who thinks she's your mother called.

0:02:34 > 0:02:37- That's my actual mother, Mother.- No.

0:02:37 > 0:02:42I am your mother. She is as potty as monkey poo...in a potty.

0:02:42 > 0:02:48It's OK, everyone. Whoever ate my porridge is not sleeping in my bed.

0:02:48 > 0:02:50- Worth checking.- What did my mum say?

0:02:50 > 0:02:54The mad woman said she was coming round at midday.

0:02:54 > 0:02:57- I put her straight. - My mum is coming round today.

0:02:57 > 0:03:00I've told you that several times and Little Howard....

0:03:00 > 0:03:05- Why have you written Mulberry Bush on the wall in jam?- I didn't!

0:03:05 > 0:03:10Ooh, didn't you find me under a mulberry bush, Big Howard?

0:03:10 > 0:03:14I, er... Yes, but that is beside the point. If you didn't do it,

0:03:14 > 0:03:19- who did?- We already know that someone broke in to eat my porridge

0:03:19 > 0:03:23- and ransack your bedroom. - Be that as it may,

0:03:23 > 0:03:27- I want it cleaned up immed... Ransack my what?- Oh, yes.

0:03:27 > 0:03:32- I forgot - someone has ransacked your bedroom.- Why didn't you say?

0:03:32 > 0:03:36- Aghhh!- That is hardly important now, Big Howard.

0:03:36 > 0:03:40Mother, did you see who ate my porridge?

0:03:40 > 0:03:44No. Sorry. I've been too busy being an excellent mother.

0:03:44 > 0:03:48You're not jealous of Big Howard's mum, are you, Mother?

0:03:48 > 0:03:54Jealous?! Me? Of that daft, lardy... lovely, dear woman

0:03:54 > 0:03:56whom I respect and admire?

0:03:56 > 0:04:01- Thank goodness my sketch pad is safe.- Your what?- Um, not important.

0:04:01 > 0:04:04What are we going to have for tea with my mum tonight?

0:04:04 > 0:04:08We've more porridge, if she doesn't mind eating it out of your hair.

0:04:08 > 0:04:13Which she won't, if she's really your mum - which she isn't.

0:04:13 > 0:04:19Oh, look at this! There's a parade of monkeys in the woods at 11.00am.

0:04:19 > 0:04:22And a red herring sale. That's in half an hour.

0:04:22 > 0:04:27I'll just put this somewhere safe and maybe have a shower.

0:04:27 > 0:04:29You two run along, then.

0:04:29 > 0:04:34Don't worry. I've already prepared a special welcome for your "mum".

0:04:34 > 0:04:38Big Howard, was that the mulberry bush you found me under?

0:04:38 > 0:04:42- No, that's not a mulberry bush. - What about that one?

0:04:42 > 0:04:46- Just think about the monkeys. - That one must be a mulberry bush.

0:04:46 > 0:04:51What's this mulberry bush business? Is it about where you came from?

0:04:51 > 0:04:57- Because it's time I explained... - Ooh, look! Monkey parade!

0:04:57 > 0:05:03- I've never had pickled red herrings. Brilliant!- And I love monkeys!

0:05:03 > 0:05:05How did they know?

0:05:37 > 0:05:38Ooh.

0:05:40 > 0:05:43I can't see any monkeys round here.

0:05:43 > 0:05:45Hello? Monkeys?

0:05:50 > 0:05:52Aghh! Trapped!

0:05:52 > 0:05:55Like a mouse!

0:05:55 > 0:05:57A plastic mouse!

0:05:57 > 0:05:58Ah!

0:05:58 > 0:06:01Little Howard, we meet at last.

0:06:03 > 0:06:05Goodness gracious!

0:06:05 > 0:06:06Here's an ad.

0:06:06 > 0:06:09Come to Barry B.Nobo's World of Monkeys,

0:06:09 > 0:06:13chimps, gorillas and maybe more! (May not contain monkeys.)

0:06:13 > 0:06:17Ride the gorillas, have lunch made for you by an orangutan.

0:06:17 > 0:06:21Race a silverback! It's the day out to end all days out.

0:06:21 > 0:06:24Especially if you aren't a gorilla.

0:06:27 > 0:06:30Oh! I... You... I...

0:06:30 > 0:06:33I've got a big question, Little Howard.

0:06:33 > 0:06:36Why can't I be you?

0:06:36 > 0:06:38SQUEAKING

0:06:39 > 0:06:43- There's something wrong with your klaxon.- Shut up!

0:06:43 > 0:06:45You're another cartoon boy.

0:06:45 > 0:06:49- You look...- Just like you, I know!

0:06:49 > 0:06:51But this is brilliant.

0:06:51 > 0:06:53You are in a cage.

0:06:53 > 0:06:56Yes, I was going to mention that,

0:06:56 > 0:06:58but I didn't want to spoil the moment.

0:06:58 > 0:07:00Why am I in a cage?

0:07:00 > 0:07:04Because now it's your turn. I've watched you all my life,

0:07:04 > 0:07:07with home-made binoculars, hanging upside-down

0:07:07 > 0:07:10from a tree in the rain with nostrils full of water.

0:07:10 > 0:07:15I have watched your house clinging to the underside of passing cars.

0:07:15 > 0:07:18- Even after they fitted the speed bumps?- Yes.

0:07:18 > 0:07:22- They may calm traffic, but they make me angry!- You must be...

0:07:22 > 0:07:27I've just worked it out. You've been eating my porridge!

0:07:27 > 0:07:31That was porridge? I thought it was some sort of organic cement!

0:07:31 > 0:07:36- I used it to shore up the walls in the games room.- Games room?

0:07:36 > 0:07:40- This house is amazing. You're so lucky.- Lucky?!

0:07:40 > 0:07:45I had to build it myself out of twigs, porridge and cuckoo spit.

0:07:45 > 0:07:50Have you ever tried annoying a cuckoo so much it flobs at you?

0:07:50 > 0:07:53- I must admit I haven't.- I'd rather have a proper house like you

0:07:53 > 0:07:56and a TV show and a proper klaxon.

0:07:56 > 0:07:59Mine's made of leaves and pine cones.

0:07:59 > 0:08:01It sounds like a wasp doing a guff.

0:08:01 > 0:08:04SQUEAKING A lady wasp, at that!

0:08:04 > 0:08:09You made a klaxon out of leaves and pine cones? That's very clever.

0:08:09 > 0:08:12I wondered why I had nothing and you had everything.

0:08:12 > 0:08:16Then I thought, "Why don't I take everything that is yours?

0:08:16 > 0:08:21"Become you, take over your life and leave you to rot in the woods?"

0:08:21 > 0:08:23- What?! - Little Howard! Where are you?

0:08:23 > 0:08:26Ah, my future is calling me. Farewell!

0:08:26 > 0:08:30- You'll never get away with this. - I think you'll find I will!

0:08:30 > 0:08:32Or my name's not...

0:08:32 > 0:08:35FANFARE ..Little Albert.

0:08:35 > 0:08:38Sorry, your name's not Little Albert?

0:08:38 > 0:08:43No. My name is Little Albert. Or rather, it was Little Albert.

0:08:43 > 0:08:47Because now...I'm Little Howard.

0:08:47 > 0:08:50- Sorry, I'm confused. - We'd better get this straight.

0:08:50 > 0:08:55I was Little Albert, but now I'm stealing your identity

0:08:55 > 0:08:58and everything you hold dear, so I am now...

0:08:59 > 0:09:03FANFARE ..Little Howard!

0:09:03 > 0:09:06So who am I, then?

0:09:06 > 0:09:10You? Why, you're nobody!

0:09:10 > 0:09:12- EVIL CACKLE - Little Albert!

0:09:12 > 0:09:15- What about...- Little Howard!

0:09:15 > 0:09:18These red herring salesmen!

0:09:18 > 0:09:21Signs for red herrings are a complete waste of time.

0:09:21 > 0:09:26- Ah, Big Howard. We meet at last. - I saw you five minutes ago!

0:09:26 > 0:09:30Of course. Seems like forever.

0:09:30 > 0:09:32Aw... How was the monkey...

0:09:32 > 0:09:36- Ooh, you look a bit different. - Do I?

0:09:36 > 0:09:42- Yeah. Oh, is that your first nose? - You can't grow a nose, you idiot!

0:09:42 > 0:09:49- Well, what's that, then?- It's just a spot with two holes in it.

0:09:49 > 0:09:51OK. No.

0:09:51 > 0:09:54- And your hair looks a bit...- Yes.

0:09:54 > 0:09:56I thought I'd try a new colour.

0:09:56 > 0:09:59Do you like it? It is the colour of the wolf!

0:09:59 > 0:10:01Wolves are grey, aren't they?

0:10:01 > 0:10:06Those are grey wolves. This is the colour of the red wolf.

0:10:06 > 0:10:09- A red wolf? Are you all right, Little Howard?- Fine!

0:10:09 > 0:10:11I'm definitely Little Howard.

0:10:11 > 0:10:15I wasn't suggesting that you weren't Little Howard.

0:10:15 > 0:10:17Your voice sounds a bit funny.

0:10:17 > 0:10:20It's what happens if all you eat is pine cones.

0:10:20 > 0:10:24You should have eaten... Pine cones?! They're dangerous!

0:10:24 > 0:10:28Oh. I won't have to eat pine cones any more.

0:10:28 > 0:10:32- Big Howard! Help!- What was that? - It was nothing.

0:10:32 > 0:10:36Probably just the cry of a feral boy raised in the forest by wolves

0:10:36 > 0:10:38and driven mad with envy and rage.

0:10:38 > 0:10:42Oh, you! Come in, let's go home.

0:10:42 > 0:10:44Yes.

0:10:44 > 0:10:46Home!

0:10:46 > 0:10:48Big Howard!

0:10:48 > 0:10:50He-e-e-elp!

0:10:52 > 0:10:56OK. Best behaviour now. My mum will be here any minute and...

0:10:56 > 0:10:59I don't believe it!

0:10:59 > 0:11:04"Stay away from Howard, you loopy old bat."

0:11:05 > 0:11:07Right!

0:11:14 > 0:11:17Hello, boys! Who wants a snooze?

0:11:17 > 0:11:19So! ..No, thank you.

0:11:19 > 0:11:23This is your surprise for my mum, is it?

0:11:23 > 0:11:28- No, that's my surprise for the woman who thinks she's your mum!- Ah!

0:11:28 > 0:11:32Little Howard's Big Question klaxon.

0:11:32 > 0:11:35The woman who IS my mum will be here any moment.

0:11:35 > 0:11:39- So I don't want any major disasters. - KLAXON

0:11:41 > 0:11:43Your klaxon!

0:11:43 > 0:11:45Nothing bad happened to me!

0:11:45 > 0:11:47This is fantastic!

0:11:47 > 0:11:51BEEPING, FLUSHING AND CLATTERING

0:11:52 > 0:11:54Ow!!

0:11:56 > 0:11:58Mum!

0:11:58 > 0:12:00Are you all right? Little Howard!

0:12:00 > 0:12:04Oh, that wasn't Little Howard. I did that - on purpose!

0:12:09 > 0:12:15Just dropped in to tell you that my plan is going exactly to...plan.

0:12:15 > 0:12:19What does it feel like, trapped in the woods all on your own?

0:12:19 > 0:12:22Gone insane with envy and rage yet?

0:12:22 > 0:12:25No. I was just seeing what bark tasted like.

0:12:25 > 0:12:28All that saved me was the wolves.

0:12:28 > 0:12:30- Wolves?!- Yes.

0:12:30 > 0:12:34I was raised in these woods by wolves.

0:12:34 > 0:12:36- In Purley?- Yes.

0:12:36 > 0:12:39- Very short red wolves.- Red wolves?!

0:12:39 > 0:12:43- Did they have bushy tails? - Of course!

0:12:43 > 0:12:47- Like I say, they were wolves. - Sounds like foxes.- Does it?

0:12:47 > 0:12:51They said they were wolves. Can't trust any woodland creatures.

0:12:51 > 0:12:54Those tiny, ginger nut-eating swine wolves!

0:12:54 > 0:12:58They ate nuts? Now they sound like squirrels.

0:12:58 > 0:13:02They were wolves! Ginger, vegetarian, tree-climbing wolves

0:13:02 > 0:13:04with bushy tails. Got that?

0:13:04 > 0:13:10Yes! I like how you've made these things out of bracken. Very clever.

0:13:10 > 0:13:13What good has being clever done me?

0:13:13 > 0:13:17You and your dolt friend have lived in the lap of luxury -

0:13:17 > 0:13:19well, near the lap -

0:13:19 > 0:13:24on the shins of luxury, and I've been stuck here. But not any more.

0:13:24 > 0:13:26- Where are you going?- Why,

0:13:26 > 0:13:31I'm going to pop off and finish erasing you from existence for ever!

0:13:31 > 0:13:34EVIL LAUGH

0:13:34 > 0:13:37I'm starting to think Little Albert doesn't like me.

0:13:37 > 0:13:39Must escape!

0:13:40 > 0:13:45- Are you sure you're all right, Mum? - Stop fussing! I'm fine!

0:13:45 > 0:13:50Takes more to worry me than a buffoonish practical joke

0:13:50 > 0:13:52from a jumped-up toaster with airs!

0:13:52 > 0:13:57What did you call me, you human woman?

0:13:57 > 0:14:00If you two mums can't be nice to each other, there'll be...

0:14:00 > 0:14:03no more knitting or cake-baking for a week!

0:14:03 > 0:14:07- Oh, that is so unfair!- Unfair! - She started it!

0:14:07 > 0:14:12You've brought it upon yourselves. Mum, I'd like a word with Mother.

0:14:12 > 0:14:13Now you're for it!

0:14:13 > 0:14:19- Shut up!- Make sure you take that brassy gadget down a peg or two!

0:14:23 > 0:14:28Mother, is it possible that you're a bit jealous of my mum?

0:14:28 > 0:14:32- Ha! Jealous?! Of that dappy old fish-wife?- Mother,

0:14:32 > 0:14:35mum is my mum.

0:14:35 > 0:14:40But in a spurious, made-up, fictional in your own head way,

0:14:40 > 0:14:41so are you.

0:14:41 > 0:14:44- You're just saying that.- Well,

0:14:44 > 0:14:47yes, I am, but I'm saying it in a very sincere way.

0:14:49 > 0:14:52That computer's got him wrapped round its little...

0:14:52 > 0:14:56And how have you been, Little Howard? Still six?

0:14:56 > 0:14:59Silence, serving woman! What is for feeding time?

0:14:59 > 0:15:03Well, if you watch your lip, we're having your favourite.

0:15:03 > 0:15:04Fajitas!

0:15:04 > 0:15:08Ah, some kind of Spanish tree beetle. Ah! Dragonfly!

0:15:08 > 0:15:11Hand me a spear! Where is my spear?

0:15:11 > 0:15:12Come here, my beauty!

0:15:14 > 0:15:19Mother, having my real... my other mum here,

0:15:19 > 0:15:21doesn't mean I love you any less.

0:15:21 > 0:15:24Because I don't think that's possible.

0:15:24 > 0:15:26Oh, Big Howard!

0:15:29 > 0:15:32Try that on her circuit board!

0:15:33 > 0:15:36That boy's behaving oddly, as well.

0:15:36 > 0:15:40- He is a cartoon, Mum. - No, but he's more different.

0:15:40 > 0:15:44He has been acting up. He messed up my room and wrote on the wall

0:15:44 > 0:15:46and says someone's eaten his porridge.

0:15:46 > 0:15:52- There's something funny about him. - He's not as funny as he used to be.

0:15:52 > 0:15:55Of course, you weren't in the first series, were you?

0:15:55 > 0:15:57I wonder why?

0:15:59 > 0:16:01- Did I get it?- No.

0:16:01 > 0:16:03Curses!

0:16:04 > 0:16:07I'm sure you're worrying about nothing, Mum!

0:16:10 > 0:16:13It's no use!

0:16:13 > 0:16:16I'll be trapped here for ever!

0:16:16 > 0:16:20And Big Howard will never remember what the real me is...

0:16:20 > 0:16:22Oh!

0:16:24 > 0:16:28I must find Big Howard before it's too late!

0:16:28 > 0:16:31There's a lot of branches on the ground,

0:16:31 > 0:16:33so I must be careful not to fall over!

0:16:37 > 0:16:38What?!

0:16:38 > 0:16:39Help!

0:16:39 > 0:16:42Blimey! I'm seeing double!

0:16:42 > 0:16:45I must have banged my head on this...coleslaw!

0:16:46 > 0:16:50- What's your name?- Hi, I'm Tilly. - What's your name?- Lotty.

0:16:50 > 0:16:55- Have you been cloned by a mad scientist?- No, we're twins.

0:16:55 > 0:16:59- You look exactly the same. Is it good being a twin?- Yeah.

0:16:59 > 0:17:02Do you have any magical powers?

0:17:02 > 0:17:08- Sometimes we think the same things. - Wow! We've got to test this.

0:17:08 > 0:17:11Both say a number between one and ten at the same time

0:17:11 > 0:17:14and we'll see if you say the same. One, two, three, go!

0:17:14 > 0:17:17- BOTH TOGETHER: Seven. - Oh, spooky!

0:17:17 > 0:17:20- One, two, three, go! - TOGETHER: Three.

0:17:20 > 0:17:24If it happens one more time, you're psychic mind-readers. Go!

0:17:24 > 0:17:27- Five.- Six.- Oh, close! Only one out.

0:17:27 > 0:17:33I think that nearly proves that twins are a little bit magic.

0:17:33 > 0:17:36- Are either of you evil?- No.

0:17:36 > 0:17:41- Good. Does your twin ever try to eradicate you from existence?- No.

0:17:41 > 0:17:43Good. Cos my kind of half twin does.

0:17:43 > 0:17:48I'll go and try to build a nice relationship with him like you.

0:17:48 > 0:17:51- Thanks very much. Nice to meet you. Bye!- Bye!

0:17:51 > 0:17:56Ow! No need for that! Flippin' frisbee-wielding evil twins!

0:17:58 > 0:18:02I'm so glad you two mothers have patched things up.

0:18:03 > 0:18:06I'll pop the kettle on, shall I?

0:18:09 > 0:18:11I mean, you two have got so much in common.

0:18:11 > 0:18:14SCREAMING AND SHOUTING

0:18:14 > 0:18:16Mum, are you still on decaf?

0:18:16 > 0:18:21- You nasty piece of work! - I'll scratch your pixels out!

0:18:21 > 0:18:24I'll take that as a no. Come on, that's enough.

0:18:24 > 0:18:26- Break it up!- Let me at it!

0:18:26 > 0:18:30Right. Mother is going in the shed.

0:18:30 > 0:18:35And you, no more Alan Titchmarsh novels for a week!

0:18:35 > 0:18:37Oh, that is so unfair!

0:18:42 > 0:18:47Weirdos! Lovely dragonfly sandwich.

0:18:47 > 0:18:49DOORBELL RINGS

0:18:52 > 0:18:53You?

0:18:53 > 0:18:55Those are my slippers!

0:18:55 > 0:18:58There can be only one!

0:19:00 > 0:19:05- Stop it, Little Albert. We're like twins. We should be friends.- Never!

0:19:05 > 0:19:10- Purley isn't big enough for both of us!- It is! It's got three stations.

0:19:10 > 0:19:13Just an overblown typewriter in a week!

0:19:13 > 0:19:15Oh!

0:19:15 > 0:19:17I knew it!

0:19:17 > 0:19:22I knew you weren't yourself. You ate Little Howard's porridge!

0:19:27 > 0:19:29What have you done to her?

0:19:29 > 0:19:33I call this my walnut whip!

0:19:33 > 0:19:37It whips walnuts at people at upwards of 100 miles an hour.

0:19:37 > 0:19:39Now, get in the cupboard!

0:19:41 > 0:19:46I'm sorry about Mother, Mum. I dropped a trifle on her once and...

0:19:46 > 0:19:47Mum!

0:19:52 > 0:19:56That was the unmistakeable sound of Big Howard slumping unconscious.

0:19:56 > 0:19:58I'm the only one who can do that.

0:19:58 > 0:20:02I'd hoped to replace you seamlessly, Little Howard,

0:20:02 > 0:20:06but now there are witnesses and that can never be.

0:20:06 > 0:20:12My hand has been forced and now I must destroy you all!

0:20:12 > 0:20:17I will have to summon my killer wolves of death!

0:20:17 > 0:20:19No-o-o-o-o!

0:20:23 > 0:20:26Oh, that is so annoying!

0:20:26 > 0:20:28I can't stand it when that happens!

0:20:30 > 0:20:32- #- Don't you hate it when they do that?

0:20:32 > 0:20:36- #- Don't you hate it when they say, "To be continued"?

0:20:36 > 0:20:37- #- I find it so rude

0:20:37 > 0:20:41# Yes, I hate it when they do that

0:20:41 > 0:20:44# Yes, I hate it when I find it's in two parts

0:20:44 > 0:20:46# It breaks our hearts

0:20:46 > 0:20:49- #- We both hate it when they do that

0:20:49 > 0:20:52# It's so inconsiderate, the writer is an idiot

0:20:52 > 0:20:53# Idiot, idiot!

0:20:53 > 0:20:56- #- We both hate it when they do that

0:20:56 > 0:21:00- #- Does that tell you that maybe we're both the same

0:21:00 > 0:21:02- #- It's such a shame to fight

0:21:02 > 0:21:05# Yes, I hate it when they do that

0:21:05 > 0:21:09# But you'll never stop me stealing your name tonight

0:21:10 > 0:21:13- #- We have so much in common and I think that you should summon up

0:21:13 > 0:21:16- #- The common sense to tell yourself that we are both alike

0:21:16 > 0:21:19# We're not alike, we're different An eagle and an elephant

0:21:19 > 0:21:22# A genius and under-educated little tyke

0:21:22 > 0:21:23# We are so not alike

0:21:23 > 0:21:26# And if I had my way I would impale you on a spike

0:21:26 > 0:21:30- #- If we both hate it when they do that

0:21:30 > 0:21:33- #- Does that tell you maybe we should make amends

0:21:33 > 0:21:35- #- Perhaps be friends?

0:21:35 > 0:21:38# Yes, I hate it when they do that

0:21:38 > 0:21:41# But I tell you that is where the likeness ends

0:21:41 > 0:21:45# It will not mend my heart, it's just the start

0:21:45 > 0:21:48# Wait till you see the second part

0:21:48 > 0:21:50# Yes, I hate it when they do that

0:21:50 > 0:21:55# That just tells me there's another cartoon boy

0:21:55 > 0:22:00# I must destroy! #

0:22:00 > 0:22:01Ha, ha, ha!

0:22:01 > 0:22:05Come, my pretty wolves! Come and devour them!

0:22:08 > 0:22:10I knew they were squirrels!