0:00:04 > 0:00:05So tired...
0:00:05 > 0:00:08been reading book...for days.
0:00:09 > 0:00:12On last page! Must..
0:00:12 > 0:00:14Must stay awake!
0:00:14 > 0:00:16"Plimrath the Valiant pulled off the mask
0:00:16 > 0:00:21"to reveal the true identity of the killer.
0:00:21 > 0:00:23"It was none other than..."
0:00:23 > 0:00:24Zzzz.
0:00:25 > 0:00:27COCKEREL CROWS
0:00:28 > 0:00:33Steeth Gak-Slorn, Nomad of Pan-Tang?! Wow!
0:00:33 > 0:00:37That book was so good I haven't been to the toilet for three days!
0:00:37 > 0:00:40I wonder if I could sue the author?
0:00:42 > 0:00:45Big Howard! Hurry up! I've got a toilet date, that just won't wait.
0:00:45 > 0:00:47You've got a what, where?!
0:00:47 > 0:00:53Wait a minute... If Big Howard's not in the loo, who is?
0:00:53 > 0:00:57GRUNTING NOISES
0:00:57 > 0:00:59Or WHAT is!? Arrrgh!!
0:01:00 > 0:01:03Big Howard, there's a bear in the toilet!
0:01:03 > 0:01:07There can't be, I know for a fact they do that in the woods.
0:01:08 > 0:01:11Who the gibbing flump are you?!
0:01:15 > 0:01:20Arrrrrgh! Where's Big Howaard?!
0:01:20 > 0:01:22What do you mean? I AM Big Howard!
0:01:28 > 0:01:30HORN BLARES I, Little Howard,
0:01:30 > 0:01:33have come up with another one of my Biiiiiiig Questions!
0:01:33 > 0:01:35Where Is Big Howard!?
0:01:35 > 0:01:37Ow!
0:01:40 > 0:01:43Oh, maybe you are Big Howard!
0:01:43 > 0:01:44HORN BLARES
0:01:45 > 0:01:48# I love Monkeys, I love monkeys
0:01:48 > 0:01:51# All those happy little chirpy little monkeys.
0:01:51 > 0:01:55# With their tails and their bananas
0:01:55 > 0:01:58# I think that if we all were monkeys we'd have happier mananas
0:01:58 > 0:02:01# Give me monkeys, lots of monkeys
0:02:01 > 0:02:04# For you know that it's the monkeys I adore
0:02:04 > 0:02:07# If my love said that she did not love those monkeys
0:02:07 > 0:02:11# I wouldn't love her any more! # Thank you very much!
0:02:12 > 0:02:13Erm, Little Howard?
0:02:13 > 0:02:17Impostor! Monkeys! Attaaaaaack!
0:02:17 > 0:02:19Aaaargh!
0:02:24 > 0:02:26He can't be Big Howard.
0:02:26 > 0:02:30Whenever he has one of his clumsy accidents he always says...
0:02:30 > 0:02:32I do wish you wouldn't do that!
0:02:32 > 0:02:35Aargh! Who are you and what have you done with Big Howard?!
0:02:35 > 0:02:36I'm Big Howard!
0:02:36 > 0:02:40If you're Big Howard, I'm Janet Ellis!
0:02:40 > 0:02:41- Who's Janet Ellis?- Exactly!
0:02:41 > 0:02:43I don't know who she is either...
0:02:43 > 0:02:46so I can't be Janet Ellis, which means you're not Big Howard!
0:02:46 > 0:02:48There's no time for this.
0:02:48 > 0:02:51There's a bear in the loo and a big pork pie dropped on me!
0:02:51 > 0:02:56Oh! The old bear-in-the-loo- pork-pie-on-the-head excuse, eh?
0:02:56 > 0:03:01OK, if you ARE Big Howard, what are your middle names?
0:03:02 > 0:03:03Oliver Drinkwater.
0:03:03 > 0:03:05Hur hur hur!
0:03:05 > 0:03:08They are NOT funny!
0:03:08 > 0:03:10Hmm, Big Howard didn't think so either!
0:03:10 > 0:03:14Whoever you are, you're good.
0:03:14 > 0:03:18Or maybe you're a crazy, Big Howard-obsessed stalker!
0:03:18 > 0:03:20Mother! Get him!
0:03:22 > 0:03:25- Waaagh! What have you done with Mother!?- Nothing!
0:03:25 > 0:03:29- What have you done to my award?! - What award!?- This award!
0:03:29 > 0:03:33Best Joke About A Sheep At the Dibden Purlieu Comedy Festival 2001!
0:03:33 > 0:03:37YOU told a joke?!
0:03:37 > 0:03:40Yeah. How many sheep does it take to change a light bulb?
0:03:40 > 0:03:44I don't know, how many sheep does it take to change a light bulb?
0:03:44 > 0:03:48None! Sheep cannot change light bulbs!
0:03:48 > 0:03:49THAT won you an award?!
0:03:49 > 0:03:51There wasn't much competition that year.
0:03:51 > 0:03:55I think I got points for factual accuracy. Oh...
0:03:55 > 0:03:57Why did you break my award?!
0:03:57 > 0:04:02- I didn't, and it's not yours, it's Big Howard's!- I am Big Howard!
0:04:02 > 0:04:07When we find Mother, she'll back me up! Mother! Mother?
0:04:07 > 0:04:10Maybe she's been eaten by the bear!
0:04:10 > 0:04:13- That would explain why it's still in the loo.- Mother!
0:04:13 > 0:04:15- What the?- Mother!
0:04:15 > 0:04:19Typical, there's a massive power drill sticking out the floor.
0:04:19 > 0:04:21- Mother!- What's that doing there?
0:04:21 > 0:04:23And a jack-hammer?
0:04:25 > 0:04:27Mother! Mother?
0:04:27 > 0:04:31Why is the front door blocked by a massive pile of tinned meat?
0:04:31 > 0:04:35Perhaps Mother misunderstood the term "spam blocker".
0:04:35 > 0:04:37You're really not Big Howard.
0:04:37 > 0:04:42He's never said anything that clever in his entire life.
0:04:42 > 0:04:45This delivery note was signed for
0:04:45 > 0:04:47by Steeth Gak-Slorn, Nomad of Pan-Tang?!
0:04:49 > 0:04:52No! Not the Nomad of Pan-Tang!
0:04:52 > 0:04:55"Steeth Gak-Slorn staggered through the gates
0:04:55 > 0:04:58"of Metthy Spletheth of Blethy Smethy Peth.
0:04:58 > 0:05:02"Today he would finally slay Mimpar the great yeti flamper."
0:05:02 > 0:05:04How can he have been here?!
0:05:04 > 0:05:10He's from Plimrath The Valiant - the book I've been reading!
0:05:10 > 0:05:12Intruder Alert! Identify yourselves!
0:05:12 > 0:05:17- Ow!- I knew it! Mother doesn't recognise you!
0:05:17 > 0:05:22I don't recognise either of you! How do you know my name?!
0:05:22 > 0:05:24Ow! Mother, it's me!
0:05:24 > 0:05:26I know it's "you".
0:05:26 > 0:05:29But I've never seen "you" before in my operational history!
0:05:29 > 0:05:34Police! Vicar! Traffic warden! Help! Activate meatball canon!
0:05:34 > 0:05:35Meatball?
0:05:35 > 0:05:38Ow! Peg it, Fake Big Howard!
0:05:38 > 0:05:40Please don't call me that!
0:05:43 > 0:05:46Roooaar!
0:05:46 > 0:05:50- That does actually sound a lot like a bear.- Wait a minute!
0:05:50 > 0:05:55Sometimes YOU make noises like that when you're on the toilet.
0:05:55 > 0:06:00The real you, I mean. But you're not the real you, are you? So...
0:06:00 > 0:06:03the real you must be in there! Real Big Howard!
0:06:03 > 0:06:07Real Big Howard, stop pooing like a bear and help me.
0:06:09 > 0:06:12I'm not sure what you're supposed to do if you're attacked by a bear.
0:06:12 > 0:06:15I think you're supposed to just die and let it eat you.
0:06:15 > 0:06:18Arrrrgh! TOILET FLUSHES
0:06:23 > 0:06:24Phew!
0:06:24 > 0:06:26It's only Lady Gaga.
0:06:27 > 0:06:30Lady Gaga?!
0:06:30 > 0:06:32What?! Seriously!
0:06:32 > 0:06:35What?! Why is Lady Gaga in the bathroom?
0:06:35 > 0:06:37Where is the real Big Howard?
0:06:37 > 0:06:39Why has Mother lost her... agh!
0:06:39 > 0:06:41Too many questions!
0:06:41 > 0:06:44To hear the others, press the pink button during this advert.
0:06:44 > 0:06:46It won't work, but it'll give you something to do.
0:06:50 > 0:06:52Do you want to improve your memory?
0:06:52 > 0:06:57Well, why not try the miracle memory improving...thingy!
0:06:57 > 0:06:59Er, what was it?
0:06:59 > 0:07:02It's a special kind of electronic hat, wasn't it?
0:07:02 > 0:07:06No, um... No, it's gone.
0:07:09 > 0:07:13OK, Lady Gaga, if that is your real name...
0:07:13 > 0:07:15What are you doing in our...
0:07:15 > 0:07:17I mean, MY house?
0:07:17 > 0:07:20Oh, I'm jiggered if I know, pet!
0:07:20 > 0:07:23Mind like a sieve with the runs, me! Ooh, I feel right queer, I do!
0:07:23 > 0:07:28You look a bit odd, too. You're dressed like a bear!
0:07:28 > 0:07:29Oh, I know why I'm dressed as a bear.
0:07:29 > 0:07:32It's cos I'm barmy, zany and madcap.
0:07:32 > 0:07:36But I can't remember anything else at all! What am I doing here?
0:07:36 > 0:07:40Am I filming one of my kooky pop videos?
0:07:40 > 0:07:42Lady Gaga's lost her memory!
0:07:42 > 0:07:44That's not the only thing she's lost.
0:07:45 > 0:07:48Very curious Watson, very curious.
0:07:48 > 0:07:51- Er, I'm not Watson. - Well, you're not Big Howard.
0:07:51 > 0:07:53This...is a three-Sherbet-Fountain mystery.
0:07:53 > 0:07:56We need to piece together the clues!
0:07:56 > 0:07:59First! We need a glass blackboard
0:07:59 > 0:08:03like one of those ones off one of those crime dramas.
0:08:05 > 0:08:09Lady Gaga, thank you for the loan of your glass blackboard
0:08:09 > 0:08:11like they use on crime dramas.
0:08:11 > 0:08:13And the lobster suit suits you better than the bear.
0:08:13 > 0:08:16Now then, what have we got?
0:08:16 > 0:08:20One - Big Howard replaced by better looking and cleverer replica.
0:08:20 > 0:08:23I have not... Oh, er, thank you.
0:08:23 > 0:08:28Two - Mother buried under tinned meat, shooting meatballs at people
0:08:28 > 0:08:30and has no idea who I am.
0:08:30 > 0:08:33- She has no idea who I am either. - Nobody has any idea who you are!
0:08:33 > 0:08:38Three - Massive pork pie falls from ceiling.
0:08:38 > 0:08:41Four - Big drill coming up through the floor.
0:08:41 > 0:08:42And my award's broken!
0:08:42 > 0:08:45I still don't really believe that Big Howard won an award,
0:08:45 > 0:08:46but if you insist.
0:08:46 > 0:08:49And you have no memory of the last few days.
0:08:49 > 0:08:50I haven't lost my memory,
0:08:50 > 0:08:54I've just been reading and not paying attention to anything else.
0:08:54 > 0:08:58And a fictional character signed for tinned meat.
0:08:58 > 0:09:02- And I was in yer bog dressed as a funky disco bear.- With amnesia.
0:09:02 > 0:09:05- Your knees are made of ham?! - I do own gammon knee-pads,
0:09:05 > 0:09:09but I didn't wear them today. Just my necklace of scotch eggs.
0:09:09 > 0:09:11No, "amnesia" means loss of memory.
0:09:11 > 0:09:17Hang on! Scotch eggs, ham-knees, pile of tinned meat!
0:09:17 > 0:09:21And a massive pork pie! Bon Jovi, I think I've got it!
0:09:21 > 0:09:22What?!
0:09:22 > 0:09:25They're all baked meat products!
0:09:26 > 0:09:28THAT'S your big deduction?!
0:09:28 > 0:09:32Still doesn't explain why you can't recognise your best friend.
0:09:32 > 0:09:35I can recognise my best friend, he just isn't you!
0:09:35 > 0:09:38All right, I'll prove that I'm Big Howard.
0:09:38 > 0:09:41There's my driving licence, my cartoon boy licence,
0:09:41 > 0:09:44and there is my book on hypnosis.
0:09:44 > 0:09:46What's that doing there?
0:09:46 > 0:09:49Big Howard reading a book?!
0:09:49 > 0:09:52And it doesn't have any pictures?!
0:09:52 > 0:09:57"A Pocket Guide To Self-Hypnosis For The Easily Fooled."
0:09:58 > 0:10:03- Wait! Hypnosis can help you remember things, can't it!?- Sometimes!
0:10:03 > 0:10:06- How do you know? You're a pop star! - You'll never guess what, chuck!
0:10:06 > 0:10:09I'm also a fully-trained hypnotist!
0:10:09 > 0:10:10Hmm?
0:10:10 > 0:10:13I am! How else do you explain my massive popularity?
0:10:13 > 0:10:15If you want someone to put you in a trance
0:10:15 > 0:10:18and take a squizz at your hidden memory, I'm yer lady...
0:10:18 > 0:10:19Gaga.
0:10:19 > 0:10:24Well, I'm afraid that won't happen, I'm far too strong-willed to...
0:10:25 > 0:10:26Piece o' cake!
0:10:26 > 0:10:31- Little Howard?- Yesss...pleeease.
0:10:31 > 0:10:34You are, like, totally under my power.
0:10:34 > 0:10:38Nggg, I suppose so.
0:10:38 > 0:10:41Right, petal, what's the last thing you can remember?
0:10:41 > 0:10:43Being hypnotised.
0:10:43 > 0:10:46That's now, go back a bit, love.
0:10:46 > 0:10:52Ooh, I'm remembering something subconkerously!
0:10:53 > 0:10:55DOORBELL RINGS
0:10:55 > 0:10:58Little Howard, can you get that for me?
0:11:02 > 0:11:05I've got a job lot of tinned meat for Mother.
0:11:05 > 0:11:09Just sign there, please, don't worry about putting in the time.
0:11:13 > 0:11:15Ooh, jolly good, my meat's here!
0:11:18 > 0:11:20Hang on, where'd you want 'em?
0:11:20 > 0:11:23Oh, just through here pl...
0:11:27 > 0:11:29Hey, what happened then?
0:11:29 > 0:11:32You signed for delivery Gak-Slorn as you were so absorbed in your book!
0:11:32 > 0:11:36Mother lost her memory as she had the tins dropped on her processors!
0:11:36 > 0:11:40- Nice work, Lady Gaga. - I solved the mystery!
0:11:40 > 0:11:44Only one of the mysteries, Lardy Gurkah.
0:11:44 > 0:11:46Why I don't remember reading this book?
0:11:50 > 0:11:51"Dear Malcolm."
0:11:51 > 0:11:53Ahhhhh!
0:11:53 > 0:11:56One move and you're history, lobster-lady!
0:11:56 > 0:12:00Don't shoot, Mother! It's Loony Gargoyle!
0:12:00 > 0:12:04- Lady Gaga! - Really? Oh, so it is!
0:12:04 > 0:12:08Hello, dear. Big fan! You look different on the telly.
0:12:08 > 0:12:10BOOM!
0:12:10 > 0:12:11Ow!
0:12:11 > 0:12:16- Now explain who you are, cartoon tyke!- I'm not Big Howard!
0:12:16 > 0:12:19Finally, you've got it into your thick head!
0:12:19 > 0:12:23- That is just typical of you, Big Howard!- I'm not Big Howard.- Really?
0:12:23 > 0:12:26Oh, You almost had me convinced.
0:12:26 > 0:12:29Never mind who you're not, who are you?!
0:12:29 > 0:12:33- Not sure. But look at this letter. - "Dear Malcolm.
0:12:33 > 0:12:39"You might find this chapter useful. From, Big Howard?!"
0:12:39 > 0:12:42It's a chapter about hypnotising yourself
0:12:42 > 0:12:44into thinking you're someone else!
0:12:44 > 0:12:46Maybe I'm hypnotised into thinking I'm Big Howard!
0:12:46 > 0:12:49Why do you think that?
0:12:49 > 0:12:51This was signed from Big Howard, look!
0:12:56 > 0:12:59- Different!- Oh, that is rum!
0:12:59 > 0:13:03Would me doing some interpretive dance cheer you up, pet?
0:13:03 > 0:13:07- Erm...- Good work, Fake Big Howard! But where's the real Big Howard?!
0:13:07 > 0:13:12- And who are you really?- I'm not sure.
0:13:12 > 0:13:15I suppose I'm Malcolm. Malcolm...
0:13:16 > 0:13:17Malcolm...
0:13:21 > 0:13:25Hello, Big Howard? I'm Malcolm from the lookalike agency.
0:13:25 > 0:13:28You ordered a lookalike of yourself to babysit tonight.
0:13:28 > 0:13:30Yes, I did. Where is he?
0:13:30 > 0:13:34Well, you're not famous enough to have your own look-alike,
0:13:34 > 0:13:37so since nobody knows who you are, my boss thought I might do.
0:13:37 > 0:13:41I work in accounts. I'm not a very good actor.
0:13:41 > 0:13:44- But there will be a discount.- Oh.
0:13:44 > 0:13:48Right well, I could always doctor some photos,
0:13:48 > 0:13:51and I could lend you a DVD of our series, and..
0:13:51 > 0:13:54Oh, I've got a book on self hypnosis that might help out.
0:13:56 > 0:13:59- A bit stupid is he?- Oh, no, he's just reading a very good book.
0:13:59 > 0:14:03He's not really paying attention. Plimrath the Valiant.
0:14:03 > 0:14:06Ahhh!! Eeh! Urgh!
0:14:06 > 0:14:08Aaargh!
0:14:09 > 0:14:13That's lovely dears. But I still have no idea who any of you are...
0:14:13 > 0:14:19- except Lady Gaga of course, big fan. - Right back at you, babes!
0:14:19 > 0:14:22So if you don't get out of my house,
0:14:22 > 0:14:26I'll change the setting on this from "smarts a bit" to "exterminate"!
0:14:26 > 0:14:29Arrrrrrrgh!
0:14:30 > 0:14:33Silly people. Now to make this dress!
0:14:35 > 0:14:38So where IS the REAL Big Howard?
0:14:38 > 0:14:40I don't know! I can't remember anything else.
0:14:40 > 0:14:44'Ere, boys, your mother's divine! That's the dog's bangles that is!
0:14:44 > 0:14:47What is she doing in there?!
0:14:47 > 0:14:50She's making a fabulous dress out of tins of luncheon meat.
0:14:50 > 0:14:53- That is SO me.- Hey!
0:14:53 > 0:14:56Mother's always liked your dress lack-of-sense.
0:14:56 > 0:15:00She was saying so yesterday when... Oh... Hold on!
0:15:03 > 0:15:06Ooh, I could make a dress out of tinned meat!
0:15:06 > 0:15:10- That would go down well at the party!- Shhh!- Oops!
0:15:12 > 0:15:15Do you think he heard you mention the party?
0:15:15 > 0:15:18You could pull his arms off and he wouldn't notice,
0:15:18 > 0:15:20so long as it wasn't the one holding that book.
0:15:22 > 0:15:24Hey! That gives me an idea.
0:15:26 > 0:15:30I must have heard more than I realised! Uh...
0:15:31 > 0:15:35Who you gawping at like a pig who's seen a sausage machine?!
0:15:35 > 0:15:39- How do you do that?! - Me mum was a Transformer.
0:15:39 > 0:15:43Why would Mother go to a party in a dress made of tinned meat?!
0:15:43 > 0:15:49Maybe if the party was thrown by someone famous for zany dress ideas?
0:15:49 > 0:15:52Someone like you, Radio GooGoo!
0:15:52 > 0:15:54Radio Gaga!
0:15:58 > 0:16:00Lady Gaga!
0:16:00 > 0:16:02It could've been one of mine.
0:16:02 > 0:16:06I throw a party whenever I want to show off me new dance moves!
0:16:06 > 0:16:10And do you have any new dance moves, Miss Gaga?
0:16:10 > 0:16:12You bet ya Ben-10 pants I do!
0:16:12 > 0:16:17Oh, I came up with a brand new one just last night. How's it go? Yeah!
0:16:18 > 0:16:20# Everybody do the Jackhammer!
0:16:20 > 0:16:22# Brrrr! #
0:16:22 > 0:16:24- Like that.- Right.
0:16:24 > 0:16:28Can't see this one catching on if I'm honest, Lazy Gherkin.
0:16:28 > 0:16:29Lady Gaga!
0:16:29 > 0:16:32I got the idea last night when I... Ooh!
0:16:32 > 0:16:37DRILLING AND BACKGROUND MUSIC
0:16:37 > 0:16:41Come on, you daft machine!
0:16:41 > 0:16:43Oh, this is proving to be a lot of hard work.
0:16:45 > 0:16:48DRILLING
0:16:48 > 0:16:49Wow!
0:16:49 > 0:16:52I remember being here last night, and using the jackhammer,
0:16:52 > 0:16:56and a welding torch, but I can't remember why!
0:16:56 > 0:16:58And while doing that,
0:16:58 > 0:17:02did you get hit in the face by a pretend gold sheep?
0:17:02 > 0:17:04Well, I did once beat up Fiddy Cent.
0:17:04 > 0:17:08You have gold paint on your face in a distinctive fleecy pattern.
0:17:08 > 0:17:11Now, where have I seen that pattern before?
0:17:11 > 0:17:14The massive pork pie!
0:17:14 > 0:17:18You were both struck by Big Howard's Golden Sheep Award!
0:17:18 > 0:17:22- That must be how it got broken! - Big Howard loves that award!
0:17:22 > 0:17:25He told me so when I invited him to my party.
0:17:25 > 0:17:27Your Baked-Meat-roduct theme party?
0:17:27 > 0:17:29Happen as how that was the theme of it.
0:17:29 > 0:17:34Best party theme I've had since my "dress as your dead pet" sleep-over.
0:17:34 > 0:17:38So, Big Howard went to Lady Gaga's party without me!
0:17:38 > 0:17:41But where is he now? And why did he hit you with the award?
0:17:41 > 0:17:45- He didn't hit me with it! - Oh, not another one!
0:17:45 > 0:17:48DRILLING
0:17:58 > 0:18:01BAA!
0:18:03 > 0:18:08You knocked yourself out trying to beat up an enormous pork pie. Great!
0:18:08 > 0:18:14We've sorted out all the mysteries that DON'T MATTER AT ALL!?
0:18:14 > 0:18:17NOW WHERE IS BIG HOWARD!?
0:18:17 > 0:18:20MUSIC BEGINS
0:18:21 > 0:18:24# Where is he? What have you done with him?
0:18:24 > 0:18:27# He could've fallen in the toilet, he is a little dim
0:18:27 > 0:18:30# Where is he? I have got no idea
0:18:30 > 0:18:33# How could the great big doofus just simply disappear?
0:18:33 > 0:18:36# Where is he? He can't be hard to find
0:18:36 > 0:18:39# It should be pretty easy to spot his big behind
0:18:39 > 0:18:42# Where is he? He should have stayed at home
0:18:42 > 0:18:45# He's left me and Lady Gaga all on our own
0:18:45 > 0:18:48# Where have you put him? Where did he go?
0:18:48 > 0:18:51# I've found all the clues but I still don't know
0:18:51 > 0:18:54# Where has he got to? Where can he be?
0:18:54 > 0:18:57# I've found all the clues now, so where is he?
0:18:57 > 0:19:00# Where is he? I've hunted high and low
0:19:00 > 0:19:03# There can't be many places the massive twit can go
0:19:03 > 0:19:06# Where is he? I've got to find him now!
0:19:06 > 0:19:10# He's like a needle in a haystack, the size of a cow!
0:19:10 > 0:19:11# Now that he's gone missing
0:19:11 > 0:19:15# I think that you might miss him
0:19:15 > 0:19:17# He's a bit too wide, too thick, and too long
0:19:17 > 0:19:21# But you don't know what you've got till it's gone
0:19:24 > 0:19:26# Where is he? I've hunted high and low
0:19:26 > 0:19:30# There can't be many places the massive twit can go
0:19:30 > 0:19:33# Where is he? I've looked in every place
0:19:33 > 0:19:38# I think I might miss his great big face... #
0:19:40 > 0:19:43Are you STILL here? I warned you!
0:19:43 > 0:19:47I've got one meatball left, but it's been in the microwave for ages.
0:19:47 > 0:19:51This baby is thermonuclear!
0:19:51 > 0:19:54KABOOM!
0:19:56 > 0:19:59- Big Howard!- Oh...
0:19:59 > 0:20:01# There is he, I spy his pasty face
0:20:01 > 0:20:05# Turns out all along he was in a pastry case
0:20:05 > 0:20:07# There is he! He's in a massive pie
0:20:07 > 0:20:11# We're running out of time so we can't explain why! #
0:20:11 > 0:20:14OK. What were you doing in the pie?
0:20:14 > 0:20:18I wanted to jump out of the pie to surprise Lady Gaga at her party.
0:20:18 > 0:20:21And I was going too, with Big Howard!
0:20:21 > 0:20:23MOTHER! You've got your memory back!
0:20:23 > 0:20:26Oh, I got that back ages ago.
0:20:26 > 0:20:29I just wanted to try out my thermonuclear meatball bazooka.
0:20:29 > 0:20:32So, why couldn't I go to the party?
0:20:32 > 0:20:36I always invite mutant child-eating pigmy horses to my dos.
0:20:36 > 0:20:40They're great dancers, but a health-and-safety nightmare.
0:20:40 > 0:20:44He said you were so into your book you wouldn't notice he'd gone!
0:20:44 > 0:20:47But I finished my book too early.
0:20:47 > 0:20:49And he made the crust too thick.
0:20:49 > 0:20:52I had to take him all the way home from my party,
0:20:52 > 0:20:54stuck in his giant pork pie.
0:21:02 > 0:21:06- And you've been in that pie ever since?- Yeah.
0:21:06 > 0:21:08It was surprisingly comfortable,
0:21:08 > 0:21:11until you set your klaxon off and I fell on Malcolm here.
0:21:11 > 0:21:13I do wish you wouldn't do that.
0:21:19 > 0:21:23- Well that was a funny old day, wasn't it?- Big Howard,
0:21:23 > 0:21:28you might be a big flappy chump, but I did...kinda miss you.
0:21:28 > 0:21:31- It's very nice...- Even though Malcolm was cleverer than you.
0:21:31 > 0:21:35- And less clumsy. And he had better hair and...- Yes, thank you!
0:21:35 > 0:21:39I'm just glad that everything's back to normal.
0:21:39 > 0:21:40- MALCOLM:- Help!
0:21:40 > 0:21:43There's a knight with a basket of poached eggs after me.
0:21:43 > 0:21:47He thinks I'm you! He says you lost his pet butterfly
0:21:47 > 0:21:50when you were beaten at water polo by Vanessa Hudgens!
0:21:50 > 0:21:55ALL: AAAARRRGGGH!!
0:21:55 > 0:21:58Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd
0:21:58 > 0:22:00E-mail us at subtitling@bbc.co.uk