0:00:34 > 0:00:37Yep, OK,
0:00:37 > 0:00:39so I'm on the run.
0:00:39 > 0:00:41I got myself into a spot of bother.
0:00:44 > 0:00:45Gotcha!
0:00:53 > 0:00:55Hey, Vicki.
0:00:55 > 0:00:57Can you get me out?
0:00:57 > 0:01:00And you want to know my big crime? Sorry, Lockie. You know, since
0:01:00 > 0:01:05you've been hanging out with Dot, you've been acting like a real dog.
0:01:05 > 0:01:06Dog?
0:01:06 > 0:01:10'Usually, everyone loves dogs - loyal, friendly, good at frisbee,
0:01:10 > 0:01:12'but when a dog's in love...'
0:01:12 > 0:01:17- One track mind...- And there's only one place bad dogs end up...
0:01:24 > 0:01:26They end up in the doghouse.
0:01:28 > 0:01:32The question was: would anyone bail me out?
0:01:32 > 0:01:33We're not coming to get you out.
0:01:33 > 0:01:37Mum said since you've met Dot, you've...
0:01:37 > 0:01:41Yeah, Blob's right, you've changed.
0:01:41 > 0:01:43Ah, yes, the kiss with Dot.
0:01:43 > 0:01:46It's definitely changed him, and on reflection, a stint in
0:01:46 > 0:01:48the doghouse would do him good.
0:02:00 > 0:02:03No-one's coming to get me, are they?
0:02:06 > 0:02:08HOW-OW-OW-OW-OW-OWL!
0:02:12 > 0:02:15Guess I better 'fess up to what happened yesterday.
0:02:15 > 0:02:18I so wish I didn't have to show the next bit.
0:02:18 > 0:02:21Go on, rewind.
0:02:28 > 0:02:30This is me, obviously,
0:02:30 > 0:02:34dreaming about kissing Dot, who's kind of my girlfriend,
0:02:34 > 0:02:39who's kind of only 11, which is kind of weird.
0:02:41 > 0:02:43Argh! What are you doing?
0:02:43 > 0:02:45You are sucking face with your pillow
0:02:45 > 0:02:47and you ask me what I'm doing?
0:02:47 > 0:02:49You having a Dot flashback?
0:02:49 > 0:02:53- Don't start, Phillip! - Ooh, very grouchy this morning.
0:02:53 > 0:02:56I thought love was supposed to make you all kind and gooey
0:02:56 > 0:02:59so you only see the good in...
0:02:59 > 0:03:01everything.
0:03:04 > 0:03:08Sarge reckons someone at work told him if you have bananas
0:03:08 > 0:03:10after lunch you won't wet the bed.
0:03:11 > 0:03:13Glad you could join us.
0:03:13 > 0:03:16We've only got a trillion things to do before tonight.
0:03:16 > 0:03:18Tonight?
0:03:18 > 0:03:22Pollution in river, environmental protest, meeting here,
0:03:22 > 0:03:25organised by you!
0:03:25 > 0:03:28We'll have to split jobs, otherwise we'll never get through it all.
0:03:33 > 0:03:36- Chairs, more, lots more.- Chairs.
0:03:36 > 0:03:39- And for hot water?- Urn.
0:03:39 > 0:03:42And I've got...
0:03:42 > 0:03:44water samples, river photos...
0:03:46 > 0:03:49and most compelling of all,
0:03:49 > 0:03:51dead fish.
0:03:51 > 0:03:53Dead fish?
0:03:53 > 0:03:57Your mum made something to eat.
0:03:57 > 0:04:00Try one. They're good.
0:04:03 > 0:04:04She wanted to impress everyone.
0:04:04 > 0:04:07They're dairy free, gluten free and sugar free.
0:04:12 > 0:04:16They're so dry, they suck the moisture out of your eyeballs!
0:04:16 > 0:04:18You haven't written anything down.
0:04:18 > 0:04:21Yes, he has. It's a love letter, see?
0:04:21 > 0:04:23Dot, dot, dot.
0:04:23 > 0:04:26Why don't you just have some more bananas, monkey boy?
0:04:26 > 0:04:29'Normally, I would have left it at that.
0:04:29 > 0:04:32'A bit lame, I know, but it would have been enough.
0:04:32 > 0:04:35'But today, my inner dog was starting to growl.'
0:04:35 > 0:04:40You know, Phillip, Sarge said he got the banana idea from someone at work.
0:04:40 > 0:04:43Why would bedwetting come up, do you think,
0:04:43 > 0:04:45unless he was telling them about you?
0:04:45 > 0:04:49You never know, the idea might have come from Lisa.
0:04:55 > 0:04:57Are you in a bad mood?
0:04:57 > 0:05:01No, I'm deliberately nasty to Phillip just for the fun of it.
0:05:07 > 0:05:10Whoa! I wonder what the tree did.
0:05:10 > 0:05:13Well, no point complaining about someone's else's backyard
0:05:13 > 0:05:14when your own is in a smozzle.
0:05:17 > 0:05:22They're an introduced tree, a weed, really, taking over.
0:05:22 > 0:05:26And you're belting it in order to...?
0:05:26 > 0:05:29Well, I read, if you threaten them, they die.
0:05:29 > 0:05:32You tried calling it names first?
0:05:34 > 0:05:36Come on.
0:05:36 > 0:05:40Where are you going? I've made a sign. I need you to put it up.
0:05:40 > 0:05:43Oh, I'm sorry, Lockie, but you remember last time I tried to
0:05:43 > 0:05:45get on top of a chair.
0:05:45 > 0:05:47- What happened last time? - You don't want to know.
0:05:47 > 0:05:51Can I get Sarge to help you?
0:05:51 > 0:05:55Ah, well, Sarge is in a tricky position with his job.
0:05:55 > 0:05:59He can't take sides in the protest.
0:05:59 > 0:06:02He doesn't know about the meeting, does he?
0:06:02 > 0:06:04I thought it best. See, if he doesn't know, he doesn't
0:06:04 > 0:06:07have to ask us not to have it.
0:06:09 > 0:06:13I'll do the sign later, Mum. We have to go to John East right now.
0:06:13 > 0:06:15- We do?- We have to...
0:06:18 > 0:06:20'"I have to see Dot," is what I should have said.
0:06:20 > 0:06:23'"Brain meltdown because of girls,"
0:06:23 > 0:06:25'is what I should have said.'
0:06:25 > 0:06:27We have to get some pointers.
0:06:27 > 0:06:31John East, school council.
0:06:31 > 0:06:34He's got to know about saving the planet.
0:06:34 > 0:06:36Why are you scratching yourself, man?
0:06:36 > 0:06:39'What kind of animal is a walking flea resort?
0:06:39 > 0:06:42'Yeah, that's right, and I was fast becoming one.'
0:06:42 > 0:06:46So it's OK we're taking the youth group chairs from the church?
0:06:46 > 0:06:47Yeah.
0:06:47 > 0:06:51Strictly speaking, I didn't ask yet.
0:06:51 > 0:06:54Things were a bit tense at my place this morning.
0:06:54 > 0:06:58Mum and Dad's wedding anniversary, 20 years.
0:06:58 > 0:07:01Do your olds do anything to celebrate?
0:07:01 > 0:07:05Last year, Sarge made us cook dinner. quiche Lorraine and creme caramel.
0:07:05 > 0:07:08Then he made us dress up as waiters to serve it for them.
0:07:09 > 0:07:11Did it make them happy?
0:07:11 > 0:07:13Sarge pretended to be surprised.
0:07:13 > 0:07:16Mum went berserk, a full-tilt hugathon.
0:07:16 > 0:07:19Maybe that's what I should do tonight, after the meeting.
0:07:19 > 0:07:24Except...I can't cook.
0:07:28 > 0:07:34This is where you say, "No sweat, Egg, I'll help you, mate."
0:07:34 > 0:07:37Yeah, OK.
0:07:37 > 0:07:41What you just said, except I can't cook, either.
0:07:41 > 0:07:43We got the stuff from the supermarket.
0:07:43 > 0:07:44Cool! But we don't have a lot of time.
0:07:44 > 0:07:50Don't worry, Egg, we'll juggle it somehow, I promise.
0:07:50 > 0:07:54- So are you guys all set for tonight? - Totally.
0:07:54 > 0:07:56Not really.
0:07:56 > 0:07:58We still have loads of stuff to do...
0:07:58 > 0:08:02- haven't we?- Ah, so long as you've got your speech nailed.
0:08:02 > 0:08:05The rest is all just window dressing. What speech?
0:08:05 > 0:08:08- A bit higher.- Well, you guys have called a public meeting.
0:08:08 > 0:08:12People aren't showing up to knit the world's longest scarf.
0:08:12 > 0:08:14They're showing up to hear you talk
0:08:14 > 0:08:17- about the pollution in the estuary. - Higher.
0:08:19 > 0:08:20Lockie?
0:08:20 > 0:08:22What were you saying?
0:08:22 > 0:08:25We were just talking about the speech.
0:08:25 > 0:08:27What speech?
0:08:27 > 0:08:30The speech I'm not making tonight.
0:08:30 > 0:08:32Yeah.
0:08:32 > 0:08:35There'll be...speeches
0:08:35 > 0:08:38and things to eat...
0:08:38 > 0:08:41and chairs.
0:08:43 > 0:08:45Yeah, chairs to...
0:08:46 > 0:08:48chairs to sit on.
0:08:54 > 0:08:58Please tell me you've got it all under control cos I cannot
0:08:58 > 0:09:00stand up and talk in front of people.
0:09:00 > 0:09:03Why are you looking at me? I don't want to do the speech either.
0:09:03 > 0:09:08You have to. Look, come on, we can argue on the way to the supermarket.
0:09:08 > 0:09:10Want to come for a quick wave?
0:09:10 > 0:09:14Lockie, in which part of my life did you see me on a surfboard?
0:09:14 > 0:09:16We can tie my board to the back of Egg's bike
0:09:16 > 0:09:18and we can pick yours up on the way.
0:09:18 > 0:09:20Ah, so real question is,
0:09:20 > 0:09:23want to drive my girlfriend's board to the beach?
0:09:23 > 0:09:24I'll do the speech.
0:09:24 > 0:09:26'"I'll do the speech" -
0:09:26 > 0:09:30'what was I thinking!
0:09:30 > 0:09:32'I was thinking about Dot.
0:09:32 > 0:09:33'That's what I was thinking.'
0:09:38 > 0:09:40At least take your boots off!
0:09:40 > 0:09:43- Freaky toes!- What?!
0:09:46 > 0:09:49Freaky toes. You've got to promise.
0:09:49 > 0:09:51Not a word to anyone.
0:09:51 > 0:09:54I'm going to the supermarket. And I can't do the chairs on my own
0:09:54 > 0:09:57so you'd better meet me at the church at three.
0:10:07 > 0:10:10It's like a lake.
0:10:10 > 0:10:13You know what? I don't even care.
0:10:26 > 0:10:28JAWS-TYPE MUSIC
0:10:29 > 0:10:31What?
0:10:31 > 0:10:37- Something just touched my leg. - Like a shark? - I don't know. Let's go in.
0:10:37 > 0:10:39It wasn't a shark, Lockie.
0:10:39 > 0:10:43I know. But there's a lot of important stuff I've got to do.
0:10:47 > 0:10:51Dunno what know what happened. I never get the fear.
0:10:51 > 0:10:54'Maybe it was the fact that, somewhere in my brain,
0:10:54 > 0:10:57'I remembered Mum telling me that sharks can smell a dog
0:10:57 > 0:10:59'from seven kilometres away.'
0:10:59 > 0:11:01- Are you upset?- No.
0:11:01 > 0:11:03- Are you sure?- Yup.
0:11:05 > 0:11:08It's just we never get to hang out together.
0:11:09 > 0:11:13Well, we can hang out now, out of the water.
0:11:13 > 0:11:18- But you said you have got important stuff to do. - Yeah, and I do.
0:11:18 > 0:11:20What about later?
0:11:20 > 0:11:22- After the important stuff?- OK.
0:11:22 > 0:11:24Wind farm, 5 o'clock?
0:11:24 > 0:11:28'Should have just said, "No, too busy today.
0:11:28 > 0:11:30'"Let's do it tomorrow."
0:11:30 > 0:11:34'But the wind farm meant kissing...
0:11:34 > 0:11:36'maybe.'
0:11:53 > 0:11:55PHONE RINGS
0:11:57 > 0:11:59Angela's place.
0:11:59 > 0:12:01- FAKE VOICE:- Could I speak to Sarge, please?
0:12:01 > 0:12:04Phillip, is that you? You sound funny.
0:12:07 > 0:12:11- Yeah, just a bit of a cold. - Anything I can help you with?
0:12:11 > 0:12:15No, not really.
0:12:15 > 0:12:18I was just checking if Sarge is on late shift tonight.
0:12:18 > 0:12:21Sure is. Anything else?
0:12:21 > 0:12:23So, bananas, hey?
0:12:23 > 0:12:27What do you think of them, Lisa?
0:12:27 > 0:12:30- Um, they're good on cereal... - PHONE RINGS
0:12:30 > 0:12:32Sorry, Phillip, I've got to run.
0:12:32 > 0:12:35Oh!
0:12:35 > 0:12:37What was that supposed to mean?
0:12:37 > 0:12:41Good on cereal and for bedwetters or good on cereal full stop?
0:12:41 > 0:12:43Hey.
0:12:43 > 0:12:46Who on earth toasts fairy bread?
0:12:46 > 0:12:50Mum. And unless you're feeling really nasty,
0:12:50 > 0:12:53maybe don't tell her it's not normal to toast it.
0:12:53 > 0:12:57She's already feeling upset about muffins
0:12:57 > 0:12:59and the sign you didn't help put up.
0:13:07 > 0:13:08SHE GROANS
0:13:14 > 0:13:17She got up on a chair, didn't she?
0:13:27 > 0:13:29And Egg called an hour ago.
0:13:29 > 0:13:32Something about some chairs.
0:13:34 > 0:13:35'It was too late to help Egg.
0:13:35 > 0:13:37'But he'd be fine, right?
0:13:37 > 0:13:40'I mean, what's the worst thing that could happen?'
0:13:43 > 0:13:46This is for your stupid meeting, isn't it?
0:13:50 > 0:13:55'Right about now Egg is thinking what a dog I've become, but me?
0:13:55 > 0:13:58'I was too busy thinking about the wind farm and my date with Dot.'
0:13:58 > 0:14:01LOUD CRASH AND SPLINTERING WOOD
0:14:09 > 0:14:10Wow!
0:14:10 > 0:14:12I think your mum would like them all like this.
0:14:12 > 0:14:14They're more...
0:14:14 > 0:14:15sculptural.
0:14:20 > 0:14:23I think the key with aftershave is that you just put it on your face.
0:14:23 > 0:14:27- You don't usually bathe in it. - Have you done the speech?
0:14:27 > 0:14:30Yeah.
0:14:30 > 0:14:32- It's...- Can I read it?- ..all up here.
0:14:32 > 0:14:35Thought it'd be better if it came out a bit...
0:14:35 > 0:14:37naturally.
0:14:38 > 0:14:39So...
0:14:39 > 0:14:43yeah, I'd better go practise...
0:14:45 > 0:14:47somewhere quiet.
0:14:52 > 0:14:55Egg, what's this?
0:14:57 > 0:15:01It WAS quiche Lorraine and creme caramel.
0:15:08 > 0:15:11Have to think of something to talk about.
0:15:11 > 0:15:13Can't just pounce the second she arrives.
0:15:13 > 0:15:17- Hey, Dot, how's the - kissing practice?
0:15:18 > 0:15:21What to say?
0:15:21 > 0:15:23OK. So her uncle's a Green.
0:15:24 > 0:15:28Talk green. Say something about the environment,
0:15:28 > 0:15:30save the planet kind of stuff.
0:15:31 > 0:15:35Hear that? Wind power?
0:15:35 > 0:15:39THAT is the sound of coal not being burnt.
0:15:39 > 0:15:42That's the sound of coal, NOT being burnt.
0:15:44 > 0:15:47That's the sound of coal not being burnt.
0:15:52 > 0:15:55'The more I worried about Dot standing me up,
0:15:55 > 0:15:57'the more I forgot about the meeting.'
0:15:59 > 0:16:02I think we should give him five more minutes.
0:16:02 > 0:16:04We haven't got five more minutes, Egg.
0:16:04 > 0:16:07If we leave it any longer, Sarge will be home before we even start.
0:16:14 > 0:16:15Won't be long now.
0:16:21 > 0:16:24Think we need to get this show on the road.
0:16:24 > 0:16:26It's getting a bit restless in there.
0:16:26 > 0:16:28Don't want them to start trashing the place.
0:16:32 > 0:16:38You're going to have to speak to the people, Egg.
0:16:47 > 0:16:50So.
0:16:50 > 0:16:52Yeah. Uh...
0:16:54 > 0:16:58Well, we all know why we're here.
0:17:02 > 0:17:05Um, but I guess you want to hear what we think.
0:17:12 > 0:17:14Anyone here like eating dead fish?
0:17:16 > 0:17:20Well, I dunno about you but I don't normally eat live ones.
0:17:25 > 0:17:28Thanks, all. Let me know your next move.
0:17:33 > 0:17:36I think that went all right.
0:17:36 > 0:17:37You got the point across.
0:17:37 > 0:17:40Don't you, Phillip?
0:17:40 > 0:17:43Ah, yeah! First rate in my book.
0:17:43 > 0:17:45Fairy bread, anyone?
0:17:49 > 0:17:51I'm SO sorry.
0:17:57 > 0:18:01- Hello! Musical chairs - my favourite.- Yes.
0:18:01 > 0:18:03And they've all had such a lovely time
0:18:03 > 0:18:06but now they're tired and they need a lift home.
0:18:10 > 0:18:12Egg. Egg, look.
0:18:12 > 0:18:15I know I messed up.
0:18:15 > 0:18:17But I still want to know how it went.
0:18:17 > 0:18:19You wanna know how it went?
0:18:19 > 0:18:21- Two people came.- Two?
0:18:21 > 0:18:23Dot and who else?
0:18:23 > 0:18:24Mr Norden and Vicky.
0:18:24 > 0:18:28Your girlfriend was obviously doing something more important.
0:18:28 > 0:18:30Like watching cartoons.
0:18:30 > 0:18:31Yeah, right, as if!
0:18:31 > 0:18:33You know the worst thing?
0:18:33 > 0:18:38- I was such an idiot thinking we were friends.- We are!
0:18:38 > 0:18:42Yeah, right, the only reason you wanted to join was to see Dot.
0:18:42 > 0:18:45- And she doesn't even give a toss about the environment.- Yes she does.
0:18:45 > 0:18:47And what do you two talk about?
0:18:54 > 0:18:56You're cut cos you haven't even...
0:18:56 > 0:18:58Had a girlfriend?
0:18:58 > 0:19:00If having a girlfriend turns me into you, I don't want one.
0:19:00 > 0:19:03Egg, let's get a move on! Come on!
0:19:06 > 0:19:08Here - I don't think I'll be needing this.
0:19:14 > 0:19:17You missed the wind farm and a protest meeting.
0:19:17 > 0:19:21I'm guessing something really big must have come up.
0:19:21 > 0:19:25- Yeah, sorry.- 'Please don't tell me you were watching cartoons.'
0:19:25 > 0:19:31There was a rerun of all the old Porky Pigs. Lost track of time.
0:19:31 > 0:19:34MUFFLED ROCK MUSIC
0:19:47 > 0:19:48Hello, young Lockie.
0:19:50 > 0:19:53Although I probably shouldn't say "young".
0:19:53 > 0:19:56Probably doesn't go down well with young folk, eh?
0:19:58 > 0:20:01Right, well. Must away.
0:20:01 > 0:20:03Important business to attend to.
0:20:03 > 0:20:05Anniversary tomorrow.
0:20:05 > 0:20:09Need to hide this till the morn.
0:20:09 > 0:20:10It's your anniversary tomorrow?
0:20:10 > 0:20:14Tomorrow, as in not today?
0:20:16 > 0:20:18'As in best in time? I've got to tell Egg.'
0:20:18 > 0:20:21Hey Egg, open up! I've something important to tell you.
0:20:21 > 0:20:23ROCK MUSIC CONTINUES
0:20:35 > 0:20:38HOW-OW-OW-OW-OWL!
0:20:46 > 0:20:51'Guess I knew no-one would come to bail me out.
0:20:51 > 0:20:52'Maybe it's right that they didn't.
0:20:52 > 0:20:57'Maybe the only person who can bail you out is you.'
0:20:58 > 0:21:02Calling Mr and Mrs Eggleston.
0:21:02 > 0:21:03Your table awaits.
0:21:03 > 0:21:07And you better come too, Egg.
0:21:09 > 0:21:12Take a seat.
0:21:12 > 0:21:15What's all this?
0:21:15 > 0:21:17Your anniversary feast. Organised by your son.
0:21:33 > 0:21:35Have you forgiven it?
0:21:35 > 0:21:36I have, Egg.
0:21:36 > 0:21:40Which is more than I can say about him.
0:21:43 > 0:21:46- We have a bit to talk about, Lockie. - I thought we might.
0:21:46 > 0:21:49We'll start with where you disappeared to this morning
0:21:49 > 0:21:51without so much as a note.
0:21:51 > 0:21:53- He was sucking up to me. - Did he do a good job?
0:21:53 > 0:21:55It was thorough.
0:21:55 > 0:21:58That's good.
0:21:58 > 0:22:00That's a good start.
0:22:00 > 0:22:01However...
0:22:01 > 0:22:05'I don't know why Mum didn't make the speech last night.
0:22:05 > 0:22:08'She loves them - can't get enough of him.
0:22:08 > 0:22:10'I'm sparing you this one
0:22:10 > 0:22:12'but it had all the big guns.
0:22:14 > 0:22:18'Responsibility, friendship, consequences.
0:22:18 > 0:22:21'All the things I needed to remember for next time
0:22:21 > 0:22:23'to keep me out of the doghouse.'
0:22:27 > 0:22:29Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd