Quakermass

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0:00:04 > 0:00:09- What's this?- The future. I call it new wave goth electro punk.

0:00:09 > 0:00:13Don't tell me you've been making music on your computer again.

0:00:13 > 0:00:16I've only just got my hearing back from last time.

0:00:16 > 0:00:19Do you want to listen to the most important track in history?

0:00:22 > 0:00:27DISCORDANT MUSIC

0:00:27 > 0:00:31LOUD RUMBLING

0:00:31 > 0:00:36- Whoa! It's making the room shake. - I don't think that's the music.

0:00:39 > 0:00:42- I think it's an earthquake. - SCREAMING

0:00:47 > 0:00:51Phase One complete. Time to initiate Phase Two -

0:00:51 > 0:00:54- utter destruction. - EVIL LAUGH

0:00:55 > 0:00:59The 21st century faces a new kind of threat.

0:00:59 > 0:01:03Old-school spies have had their day and MI9 must create

0:01:03 > 0:01:05a new breed of skilled undercover agent...

0:01:14 > 0:01:18..hidden in a place no villain will think to look.

0:01:18 > 0:01:20Welcome to MI High.

0:01:25 > 0:01:27PHONE PLAYS MUSIC

0:01:29 > 0:01:30Yeah?

0:01:30 > 0:01:35OK. Be right there.

0:01:35 > 0:01:37No, of course I won't tell anyone!

0:01:37 > 0:01:41Davina's trapped in the toilet. The ceiling collapsed.

0:01:41 > 0:01:44LAUGHTER Hey! Don't forget your iBrick.

0:01:44 > 0:01:48Football's cancelled. That'll put my training schedule right out.

0:01:48 > 0:01:52Yeah, cos that's really important when we just had an earthquake.

0:01:52 > 0:01:54Isn't it brilliant?

0:01:54 > 0:01:59This is the first earthquake in this area for hundreds of years.

0:01:59 > 0:02:02Do you know how lucky we are to have been here when it happened?

0:02:02 > 0:02:04We didn't need to be here.

0:02:04 > 0:02:06There have been tremors all across the country.

0:02:09 > 0:02:12Have you seen Frank? There's a million repairs to do

0:02:12 > 0:02:15and we need to be prepared in case that wasn't the end of it.

0:02:15 > 0:02:18It's strange, Mrs King. I can't seem to find a thing.

0:02:20 > 0:02:22You do know there's been an earthquake

0:02:22 > 0:02:26and there's a lot more damage throughout the rest of the school?

0:02:26 > 0:02:28- That's why I've signed us up to Quake Aid.- Quake Aid?

0:02:28 > 0:02:30What's that? Some kind of fizzy drink?

0:02:30 > 0:02:34It's a nationwide sponsored run, raising money

0:02:34 > 0:02:38- for those affected by the earthquake.- What a wonderful idea.

0:02:38 > 0:02:42- Oh good. I'm glad you think so. I've put your name down.- Me?

0:02:42 > 0:02:46- With my feet?- There's nothing wrong with your feet,

0:02:46 > 0:02:48other than that you rarely use them.

0:02:48 > 0:02:52- You're just unfit.- That's not fair.I'm fitter than you.

0:02:53 > 0:02:55I resent that.

0:02:55 > 0:02:57I happen to be very fit.

0:02:57 > 0:02:59I go to yoga twice a week.

0:02:59 > 0:03:01Yoga? Remind me,

0:03:01 > 0:03:04that's the one where you spend the whole time sitting down, isn't it?

0:03:04 > 0:03:07All right then. How about this?

0:03:07 > 0:03:12Whoever drops out of the run first donates £50 to the cause?

0:03:12 > 0:03:14Make it 100.

0:03:14 > 0:03:16Deal.

0:03:18 > 0:03:20Chief Stark? Professor Quakermass here.

0:03:20 > 0:03:23There's something I must warn...

0:03:23 > 0:03:25Hello.

0:03:25 > 0:03:28MI9 switchboard? Professor Quakermass.

0:03:28 > 0:03:30Head of MI9 geophysics.

0:03:30 > 0:03:33I have vital information. Can you put me through to...?

0:03:33 > 0:03:37Yes, the dusty old bloke who used to work in the cellar.

0:03:37 > 0:03:38Hello. Hello!

0:03:42 > 0:03:45Frank. Professor Quakermass.

0:03:45 > 0:03:48Oh, nice to speak to you too.

0:03:48 > 0:03:50It's about the earthquake.

0:03:51 > 0:03:54I'm afraid it may be much worse than you think.

0:03:56 > 0:03:59Sponsorship forms for the run.

0:03:59 > 0:04:02Don't lose them...Davina.

0:04:02 > 0:04:05That's not fair. I never...

0:04:07 > 0:04:12It'll be an hour-long and everyone will be running on the spot.

0:04:12 > 0:04:14What's the point in that?

0:04:14 > 0:04:17It's called a static sprint and we're very lucky

0:04:17 > 0:04:22that the organiser has come along to tell us a little about it.

0:04:22 > 0:04:27- Please welcome Well Fit Jim.- No way.

0:04:27 > 0:04:29Hey gang.

0:04:29 > 0:04:32Let's get well fit. Give me a J.

0:04:35 > 0:04:37- J!- That's cool.

0:04:37 > 0:04:41Save your energy for the run. Smart thinking, gang!

0:04:41 > 0:04:44How can anyone take this idiot seriously?

0:04:46 > 0:04:51- Should have guessed. - OK, so he's a bit odd,

0:04:51 > 0:04:54but his static sprint classes are revolutionising fitness training.

0:04:54 > 0:04:58He invented running on the spot. Someone get the man a Nobel Prize.

0:04:58 > 0:05:01That's not all he's done. He invented a new martial art, too.

0:05:01 > 0:05:06- Jimdo.- And named it after himself. What a surprise.

0:05:06 > 0:05:09He also runs a homeless fitness charity.

0:05:09 > 0:05:11Called?

0:05:11 > 0:05:14Well Fit Jim's Homeless Centre.

0:05:16 > 0:05:20- Yes, Carrie.- I'd just like to say I think Well Fit Jim

0:05:20 > 0:05:24- and his gyms are an inspiration. - Thanks, Carrie.

0:05:24 > 0:05:27You know what, if I can help just one person

0:05:27 > 0:05:30get well fit, I'll be happy.

0:05:30 > 0:05:33Are you a Well Fit Jim's Gym gym member?

0:05:33 > 0:05:37- No. I'm saving up for a lifetime membership.- Keep your money.

0:05:37 > 0:05:40Dedication to fitness is payment enough.

0:05:40 > 0:05:42I'm going to see that you get well fit.

0:05:42 > 0:05:46A year's free membership?

0:05:49 > 0:05:50Won't need this any more.

0:05:50 > 0:05:53You will.

0:05:53 > 0:05:55OK. Thanks. I'll get right on that.

0:05:55 > 0:05:59I can't believe she's found someone as geeky about fitness as she is.

0:05:59 > 0:06:02OK, gang. There is no time to lose.

0:06:02 > 0:06:04The quake victims need our support.

0:06:04 > 0:06:07And we're going to show it by getting the whole country running

0:06:07 > 0:06:09in time to the Well Fit Jim's theme music.

0:06:09 > 0:06:12He'll be making a fortune out of this.

0:06:12 > 0:06:14Actually, I'm not making a penny.

0:06:14 > 0:06:17My gyms were damaged in the tremors, too.

0:06:17 > 0:06:19I'm doing this because...

0:06:19 > 0:06:24- I'm a victim, too. - Well, that told you.

0:06:24 > 0:06:27BUZZING

0:06:38 > 0:06:40BEEPING

0:06:40 > 0:06:41BELL RINGS

0:06:41 > 0:06:43GRINDING

0:06:46 > 0:06:48Frank. The lift isn't working.

0:06:48 > 0:06:51'The tremors have put the shaft out of commission.

0:06:51 > 0:06:53'You'll have to use the stairs.'

0:06:53 > 0:06:56I didn't even know there were stairs.

0:07:01 > 0:07:04- I can't see the bottom. - How many stairs are there?

0:07:04 > 0:07:09I had used them once years ago. I lost count at 500.

0:07:09 > 0:07:11It's about half a mile down.

0:07:11 > 0:07:13Right. We'd better get going, then.

0:07:20 > 0:07:22That's better.

0:07:26 > 0:07:30Keep In Shape With Well Fit Jim.

0:07:47 > 0:07:50We should use the stairs more often, they're great for the quads.

0:07:50 > 0:07:54Maybe...probably fix lift.

0:07:54 > 0:07:57Gather your strength, agents, I have a mission for you.

0:07:59 > 0:08:02- Professor...- Carry on.

0:08:02 > 0:08:07Professor Quakermass used to be head of MI9's natural disasters unit.

0:08:07 > 0:08:10He claims to have some important information,

0:08:10 > 0:08:13but MI9 brass won't listen to him. I've said we'll hear him out.

0:08:13 > 0:08:15Why won't they listen to him?

0:08:15 > 0:08:18There's a feeling that since his unit was replaced by a computer,

0:08:18 > 0:08:23the professor's been trying to prove his worth by inventing problems.

0:08:23 > 0:08:26Oh, great, he's potty.

0:08:26 > 0:08:29He's a great man, who at the end of a brilliant career,

0:08:29 > 0:08:32may not be quite as effective as he once was.

0:08:32 > 0:08:34Yup - potty.

0:08:34 > 0:08:36Visit him. See what he has to say.

0:08:36 > 0:08:39You couldn't have said this over communicators?

0:08:39 > 0:08:42We've got to walk back up the stairs again now.

0:08:42 > 0:08:44You haven't got to walk up the stairs.

0:08:44 > 0:08:48- No?- You can always run. It's not like you don't need the exercise!

0:08:54 > 0:08:58- Inconceivable, you see.- I can see when nobody listens to him.

0:08:58 > 0:09:01What's this got to do with the earthquakes?

0:09:01 > 0:09:05An earthquake felt nationwide should look like this.

0:09:05 > 0:09:07- Correct?- Yes, of course.

0:09:07 > 0:09:11- But this is what we experienced. - That doesn't make sense.

0:09:11 > 0:09:15- Precisely - inconceivable.- So there was more than one earthquake?

0:09:15 > 0:09:1726, simultaneously.

0:09:17 > 0:09:21In apparently random locations with identical directionality.

0:09:21 > 0:09:22The total effect was so strong,

0:09:22 > 0:09:26the whole country moved 12 centimetres nearer to France.

0:09:26 > 0:09:30- But that's not possible.- Well, the odds are 22 quintillion to one,

0:09:30 > 0:09:32but I think impossible covers it.

0:09:32 > 0:09:34OK, that's good news.

0:09:34 > 0:09:38If it's that rare, it's not gonna happen again, is it?

0:09:38 > 0:09:40I don't know.

0:09:40 > 0:09:43Sometimes a tremor like this is just a pre-shock to a much bigger event.

0:09:43 > 0:09:48It's impossible to tell, it shouldn't have happened in the first place.

0:09:48 > 0:09:51OK, so what could have caused it?

0:09:51 > 0:09:54There are six potential causes for earthquakes.

0:09:54 > 0:09:58One, plate tectonics. Two, a movement in the earth's mantle.

0:09:58 > 0:10:02- We'd have detected either of them. - Correct. Three, massive vibrations.

0:10:02 > 0:10:07In lots of random locations simultaneously with no-one noticing?

0:10:07 > 0:10:10- I don't think so.- Four, sonic boom.

0:10:10 > 0:10:13Someone could have set-up a sonic boom at each epicentre?

0:10:13 > 0:10:16A sonic boom that powerful would deafen everyone in Europe,

0:10:16 > 0:10:20- so the final option, option five... - You said there were six.

0:10:20 > 0:10:23Did I? Sorry, brain not what it used to be.

0:10:23 > 0:10:25I meant five.

0:10:25 > 0:10:27So, what is option five?

0:10:27 > 0:10:28Massive bombs.

0:10:28 > 0:10:31But no-one heard any explosions.

0:10:31 > 0:10:35- No. Therefore...- A silent mega-bomb.

0:10:35 > 0:10:38Exactly! Well done. Have a biscuit.

0:10:44 > 0:10:48It's great you're involved. I didn't think charity was your thing.

0:10:48 > 0:10:52Millions of people have signed up. It's like a national party.

0:10:52 > 0:10:55And the Scoop never misses a party. Check it.

0:10:55 > 0:10:57Four pages filled with sponsors.

0:10:57 > 0:11:02Wow! Julius Caesar, William Shakespeare and Rumpelstiltskin.

0:11:02 > 0:11:06Yeah, is that the curly-haired kid in Year 8?

0:11:06 > 0:11:10- These are fake names. No-one's really sponsored you yet.- Oh, bruv!

0:11:10 > 0:11:14Now I got to totally got to start again.

0:11:14 > 0:11:17Still, plenty of time.

0:11:17 > 0:11:19Thanks...

0:11:19 > 0:11:21Madonna.

0:11:23 > 0:11:27- Hope you're running. It'll do you good to get a bit involved.- Me?

0:11:27 > 0:11:31I can hardly walk down a flight of stairs without getting puffed out.

0:11:31 > 0:11:33BUZZING

0:11:37 > 0:11:40Nothing in the satellite image.

0:11:40 > 0:11:44I suppose a silent bomb detonated underground

0:11:44 > 0:11:48with an explosion force of... Oh, I need something to write on.

0:11:48 > 0:11:50Ah!

0:11:50 > 0:11:57A force of less than x3 might be indetectable from space.

0:11:57 > 0:11:59Sorry.

0:11:59 > 0:12:02Oh! Thank you.

0:12:02 > 0:12:04Now, let's try it with a force of less than x2.

0:12:07 > 0:12:09Any joy with the map, Carrie?

0:12:09 > 0:12:11Um...No.

0:12:11 > 0:12:12Nothing yet.

0:12:12 > 0:12:20- Ah! Agents. I hope your arrival means you've had an idea.- Huh?

0:12:20 > 0:12:23- You called us.- No. - That would be me.

0:12:23 > 0:12:27- I thought they could do with the exercise.- You?

0:12:27 > 0:12:29I'm going to...

0:12:29 > 0:12:31I'm going to sit down.

0:12:31 > 0:12:34Now you're here, you can help with the investigation.

0:12:34 > 0:12:38If someone is setting these bombs off, there must be some evidence.

0:12:38 > 0:12:41Is that the same map? The symbols are different.

0:12:41 > 0:12:44OK, this isn't the quake map,

0:12:44 > 0:12:47it's the one showing Well Fit Jim's gyms.

0:12:47 > 0:12:51I was looking for the newest one. I think clearer after exercise.

0:12:51 > 0:12:55That's weird. The gym locations are exactly the same as the epicentres.

0:12:55 > 0:12:58Well spotted, young lady. Have another biscuit.

0:12:59 > 0:13:03Could Well Fit Jim have set up a silent bomb at each of his gyms?

0:13:03 > 0:13:06Simultaneously destroying all his own businesses? Right.

0:13:06 > 0:13:08It's got to be worth taking a look.

0:13:08 > 0:13:11He's been ruined and now he's running Quake Aid for free.

0:13:11 > 0:13:14Where's his motive? You've been spies too long.

0:13:14 > 0:13:15You're seeing bad guys everywhere.

0:13:15 > 0:13:19You're seeing good guys even when the evidence points at them.

0:13:19 > 0:13:22If he's got nothing to hide, he's got nothing to worry about.

0:13:22 > 0:13:24Well, you can do it without me.

0:13:24 > 0:13:28Carrie, you don't get to choose which missions you go on.

0:13:28 > 0:13:30We'll discuss this later.

0:13:30 > 0:13:34In the meantime, I'm sending you recce to Jim's nearest gym.

0:13:34 > 0:13:36How exciting. Do I need a disguise?

0:13:36 > 0:13:39I've got a pirate costume somewhere.

0:13:39 > 0:13:42Actually, I meant the others. Probably best if you stay here.

0:13:42 > 0:13:45Oh, quite. Probably ought to start making plans for

0:13:45 > 0:13:47reopening my MI9 department anyway.

0:13:47 > 0:13:51They're bound to want us back now after this.

0:13:51 > 0:13:55I've got a gadget that might help on the mission. Avril's new song.

0:13:55 > 0:13:59If we get the enemy to listen to this, it'll fry their brains.

0:13:59 > 0:14:02I think I can do better than that.

0:14:02 > 0:14:03An old favourite.

0:14:03 > 0:14:08The camera contacts. Blink and they record what you've seen,

0:14:08 > 0:14:12plus, this, Nominal Olfactory Sense Estimator.

0:14:12 > 0:14:17NOSE for short. It detects any evidence of explosive materials.

0:14:17 > 0:14:19Won't it be obvious I'm wearing it?

0:14:19 > 0:14:23- Don't worry, you can't see it through the moustache.- What moustache?

0:14:23 > 0:14:28- 50p a minute? Thanks, Donovan. That's really generous.- Not really.

0:14:28 > 0:14:31You won't last more than 30 seconds.

0:14:34 > 0:14:35What are you wearing?

0:14:35 > 0:14:38Impressive, innit? It's my designer running gear.

0:14:38 > 0:14:41You don't think the heels are too low?

0:14:41 > 0:14:44"Let's get well fit. Let's get well fit."

0:14:52 > 0:14:56How's your fitness training coming along, Mrs King? £100, wasn't it?

0:14:57 > 0:15:00- Well fit! - "Let's get well fit!"

0:15:07 > 0:15:10Your free membership entitles you to use all the facilities.

0:15:10 > 0:15:14This is the weights room, essential if you want to get well fit,

0:15:14 > 0:15:17but through here is where the magic really happens.

0:15:20 > 0:15:22- Hey, gang! Ready to get well fit? - Well fit!

0:15:22 > 0:15:25This is the static sprint room.

0:15:25 > 0:15:27Every gym has one.

0:15:27 > 0:15:30Sprung floors and speakers connectedto a central sound system

0:15:30 > 0:15:34based here at this gym. It means allof my students run together

0:15:34 > 0:15:35in harmony wherever they are.

0:15:35 > 0:15:38We'll be doing the same when we get well fit at Quake Aid.

0:15:38 > 0:15:41It's amazing.

0:15:41 > 0:15:45- You've achieved so much.- Thanks, Carrie. You know, it's really nice

0:15:45 > 0:15:48to meet somebody who feels as strongly as I do about fitness.

0:15:48 > 0:15:51Ooh, the next static sprint class is about to begin.

0:15:51 > 0:15:55- Why don't you try it out? - Yeah, I'd... Who's that?

0:15:55 > 0:16:00Oh, that's just one of my new students. Settling in OK, Carlos?

0:16:00 > 0:16:03Si, Senor Jim. I get well fit.

0:16:06 > 0:16:09OK, guys, I've got a Jimdo class to take, so I'll leave you to it.

0:16:25 > 0:16:28- What are you doing? - Checking for bomb materials.

0:16:28 > 0:16:31Well, you're not going to find any. Where's Rose?

0:16:31 > 0:16:34Sorry, senorita.

0:16:34 > 0:16:35No speak-ah the English.

0:17:03 > 0:17:05Found what you're after?

0:17:05 > 0:17:08OK, so I haven't found anything connected to explosives

0:17:08 > 0:17:10or earthquakes, yet.

0:17:10 > 0:17:13You're not going to find anything. He's clean.

0:17:13 > 0:17:16- I'll prove it if I have to. - This is a bit suspicious.

0:17:16 > 0:17:19He spent all his money on underwater real estate.

0:17:20 > 0:17:25Maybe he's building an aquarium or maybe he's not very good with money.

0:17:25 > 0:17:29Not everyone is a criminal genius, Rose.

0:17:29 > 0:17:32Why don't you look for someone with a motive?

0:17:32 > 0:17:37- Hola, buenos dias. Gym's clean. - Great! Now get out.

0:17:37 > 0:17:40Let the rest of us who actually believe in human decency

0:17:40 > 0:17:42get on with their training.

0:17:42 > 0:17:45Maybe she's right. There's no way Jim did this,

0:17:45 > 0:17:49he's an idiot. We should look harder for other suspects.

0:17:49 > 0:17:53No-one's getting anything out of the earthquakes, apart from Quakermass.

0:17:53 > 0:17:56- What's he getting out of it? - It sounds like he's getting

0:17:56 > 0:17:59- his old MI9 department back. - That's a strong motive.

0:17:59 > 0:18:01He is an earthquake specialist.

0:18:01 > 0:18:04If anyone would know how to do it, it would be him.

0:18:04 > 0:18:06Hang on. He told us the five triggers.

0:18:06 > 0:18:09It's not like he's capable of creating any of them.

0:18:09 > 0:18:12He told us there were six ways and then changed his mind.

0:18:12 > 0:18:15What if there's an easier sixth way and he didn't tell us?

0:18:29 > 0:18:34There, Timothy. Now you have one definite real-life sponsor.

0:18:34 > 0:18:36Yeah?

0:18:36 > 0:18:39How do I know you really are Mrs King?

0:18:39 > 0:18:41Of course I'm Mrs King.

0:18:41 > 0:18:44- Let me see some ID. - Oh, I haven't got time for this.

0:18:44 > 0:18:46I'm supposed to be training.

0:18:46 > 0:18:50I need to get fit enough to beat Mr Flatley.

0:18:50 > 0:18:54I mean, to participate in the charity event.

0:18:54 > 0:18:58All right. I'll take your word for it this time, Mrs King,

0:18:58 > 0:19:00or whoever you are.

0:19:04 > 0:19:07It must have been hard when they sacked you.

0:19:07 > 0:19:09It was, they think computers can do anything!

0:19:09 > 0:19:13But they can't, can they? Sometimes they're totally useless.

0:19:13 > 0:19:16I bet you'd like to show them just how useless they are.

0:19:16 > 0:19:18How far would you go, Professor?

0:19:18 > 0:19:21Now, wait a minute. You don't think I had anything to do with this?

0:19:21 > 0:19:24- Did you?- Gosh, me? A super-villain. How exciting.

0:19:24 > 0:19:26Are you absolutely sure?

0:19:26 > 0:19:30- What makes you think he's involved? - He has expertise and the motive.

0:19:30 > 0:19:32They're right. I have.

0:19:32 > 0:19:34I was furious when they sacked me.

0:19:34 > 0:19:37Do you think I went mad?

0:19:37 > 0:19:38Maybe I did it without knowing.

0:19:38 > 0:19:41Some sort of memory gas.

0:19:41 > 0:19:45Professor, what's the sixth way of starting an earthquake?

0:19:45 > 0:19:48There isn't one. At least I don't think there is.

0:19:48 > 0:19:51Maybe I brainwashed myself into thinking that?

0:19:51 > 0:19:52Gosh, I'm a fiend.

0:20:14 > 0:20:17Professor, if you're holding anything back,

0:20:17 > 0:20:19now is the time to tell us.

0:20:19 > 0:20:22Well, I don't deny it does look bad.

0:20:22 > 0:20:26Apart from the ferry companies, I'm the only person to gain by it.

0:20:26 > 0:20:28Hang on. What do you mean, ferry companies?

0:20:28 > 0:20:31Well, France is now 12 centimetres nearer.

0:20:31 > 0:20:35- Technically, they'll save on petrol. - Is that worth investigating?

0:20:35 > 0:20:38No, no. There was no way of predicting how far

0:20:38 > 0:20:42Britain would move during the earthquake. A few metres more

0:20:42 > 0:20:45- and they'd have been out of business.- Why?

0:20:45 > 0:20:49The clash of continental plates would have forced the land to the surface.

0:20:49 > 0:20:51- You could have walked to France. - That's it.

0:20:51 > 0:20:56- That's the motive we've been looking for, I've got it.- Well done, Rose.

0:20:56 > 0:21:00But I have to warn you, I'm out of biscuits.

0:21:00 > 0:21:03The worthless real-estate Well Fit Jim has is under the Channel.

0:21:03 > 0:21:06If it comes to the surface, it'll be worth trillions.

0:21:06 > 0:21:10Rose, you need to forget about him. Carrie's right. He's clean.

0:21:10 > 0:21:14No. Carrie's not right.

0:21:14 > 0:21:17Carrie was wrong about him all along.

0:21:17 > 0:21:21Carrie feels like a mug for the way she behaved.

0:21:21 > 0:21:24It is Well Fit Jim and I know how he's doing it.

0:21:24 > 0:21:28- Earthquake cause number three. - Number three? Massive vibrations?

0:21:28 > 0:21:31His static sprint classes are wired together

0:21:31 > 0:21:35and all 20,000 runners run in the same direction at the same time.

0:21:35 > 0:21:38The rhythm creates vibrations which set off the tremors.

0:21:38 > 0:21:41- Brilliant!- Quake Aid.

0:21:41 > 0:21:44He's about to do the same thing with 25 million people.

0:21:44 > 0:21:48- What kind of effects could Quake Aid cause?- Oh, well, let's see.

0:21:48 > 0:21:51Thank you, Frank.

0:21:51 > 0:21:53X=(4x3)...

0:21:54 > 0:21:56Category 12. Wipeout.

0:21:56 > 0:21:58Every building in the UK destroyed.

0:21:58 > 0:22:01This must have been his plan all along.

0:22:01 > 0:22:04The minor tremors gave him the excuse to launch Quake Aid.

0:22:04 > 0:22:08- He's going to change the face of Europe.- Not if we stop him.

0:22:08 > 0:22:11Millions of people are doing statics prints.

0:22:11 > 0:22:13We've only got time to stop a fraction.

0:22:13 > 0:22:17We just need to stop them running in rhythm with each other.

0:22:17 > 0:22:21- Disrupt the waves. Quite right.- The music's pumped from a gym near here.

0:22:21 > 0:22:24If we can get there, we can switch off the beat everyone runs to.

0:22:24 > 0:22:27Ready to run up the stairs one more time?

0:22:27 > 0:22:29Never readier. Let's kick bottom!

0:22:29 > 0:22:32Professor, probably better if you stay here

0:22:32 > 0:22:34and help me bring MI9 up to date.

0:22:34 > 0:22:37Yes. Yes, quite right. Well, good luck, agents.

0:22:37 > 0:22:39Let's go!

0:22:39 > 0:22:43Hi, gang. This is Well Fit Jim calling out to everyone in the UK

0:22:43 > 0:22:46from Well Fit Jim's central gym.

0:22:46 > 0:22:49We're about to start the music, so make sure you're warmed up.

0:22:49 > 0:22:51It's time to get well fit.

0:22:51 > 0:22:53CHEERING

0:22:53 > 0:22:56What a great cause this is, Mrs King.

0:22:56 > 0:23:00I'm sure they'll really be able to use your £100.

0:23:00 > 0:23:03Your £100, I think you mean, Mr Flatley.

0:23:03 > 0:23:05Well, we'll see. We'll see.

0:23:05 > 0:23:08May the best teacher win.

0:23:22 > 0:23:25It's got to be here somewhere. We're running out of time.

0:23:25 > 0:23:29"Get ready, gang. When the music stops, remember to keep in rhythm."

0:23:29 > 0:23:31Follow the wire!

0:23:38 > 0:23:43- There must be a secret room. Look for a button or a lever.- No time.

0:23:47 > 0:23:50Hey, Jim. Ready to get well flattened?

0:23:50 > 0:23:52Sorry, Carrie. You're too late.

0:23:52 > 0:23:55Here we go, gang. Let's change the world!

0:23:55 > 0:23:57EVIL LAUGH

0:23:59 > 0:24:02- MUSIC THUMPS - Here we go.

0:24:02 > 0:24:04Good luck, Mr Flatley.

0:24:04 > 0:24:06- Thank you, Mrs King.- You'll need it.

0:24:11 > 0:24:15HE CRIES OUT

0:24:15 > 0:24:16- What's that?- Jimdo.

0:24:16 > 0:24:19Luckily I'm a black belt.

0:24:19 > 0:24:21SHE CRIES OUT

0:24:28 > 0:24:30THEY BOTH SHOUT OUT

0:25:02 > 0:25:04Did you really think you could defeat me

0:25:04 > 0:25:07using a martial art I invented myself?

0:25:11 > 0:25:16- With help from the earthquake you invented, too.- Quick. Shut it down.

0:25:28 > 0:25:30Is the ground shaking?

0:25:33 > 0:25:36You're probably just a little bit dizzy.

0:25:36 > 0:25:39After all this exercise, Mrs King.

0:25:39 > 0:25:41Would you like to concede?

0:25:41 > 0:25:43Certainly not.

0:25:43 > 0:25:45Keep going, everyone!

0:25:45 > 0:25:49We've got the rhythm, we don't need the music.

0:25:51 > 0:25:54People must have kept running when the music stopped.

0:25:54 > 0:25:57We can't let the whole country get flattened.

0:25:57 > 0:25:58There must be something we can do.

0:25:58 > 0:26:02We could do something to make everyone lose their rhythm.

0:26:02 > 0:26:04- How?- Trust me.

0:26:10 > 0:26:13AVRIL'S MUSIC BLARES OUT

0:26:27 > 0:26:28Losers!

0:26:28 > 0:26:31THUD! LAUGHTER

0:26:37 > 0:26:42- We did it.- Consider your free membership withdrawn.

0:26:44 > 0:26:46I can't believe I believed in him.

0:26:46 > 0:26:49I guess I'm so used to people thinking I'm weird about fitness

0:26:49 > 0:26:52that it was nice to find someone who felt the same.

0:26:52 > 0:26:56Don't beat yourself up. 25 million other people believed in him, too.

0:26:56 > 0:27:00Besides, you're right. I see evil geniuses everywhere I look.

0:27:00 > 0:27:03And I don't see them when they're staring me in the face.

0:27:03 > 0:27:06Still, I think it's important to see the best in people.

0:27:06 > 0:27:09It's a great attitude. I think I'll try it.

0:27:09 > 0:27:12From now on, wherever I look, I'll see people as good geniuses.

0:27:12 > 0:27:15Well, don't look over there, then.

0:27:18 > 0:27:23Did you hear? That weird music was voted worst song of all time.

0:27:23 > 0:27:26I heard it was so bad all the dogs went crazy.

0:27:26 > 0:27:30I thought it was good. It sounds like my new wave goth electro punk.

0:27:30 > 0:27:33- You left it in the classroom. - What did you think?

0:27:33 > 0:27:36I honestly think that this music could save the world.

0:27:36 > 0:27:40There's no need to be sarcastic.

0:27:40 > 0:27:42Has anyone seen Mrs King or Mr Flatley?

0:27:48 > 0:27:50I could keep going like this for hours.

0:27:52 > 0:27:54I'm just warming up.

0:27:54 > 0:27:58Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:27:58 > 0:28:01E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk