0:00:06 > 0:00:10# You're my mate when I'm not feeling strong
0:00:11 > 0:00:15# You put me right when I am going wrong
0:00:17 > 0:00:21# You're my hands when my arms are tied
0:00:22 > 0:00:26# You colour me in when I'm black and white
0:00:28 > 0:00:34# You pick me up when I fall down You take my frown and turn it around
0:00:34 > 0:00:38# I couldn't wish for better friends to share my life with
0:00:38 > 0:00:44# Don't be sad and lonely if you need someone to hold your hand
0:00:44 > 0:00:47# Me and my monsters care
0:00:49 > 0:00:53# Me and my monsters care. #
0:01:00 > 0:01:02OK, zip your lips and listen up.
0:01:02 > 0:01:08I'm Kate Carlson and I'm here to kick some culinary butt.
0:01:08 > 0:01:10No mercy!
0:01:10 > 0:01:14Welcome to the first online edition of Furious Food.
0:01:14 > 0:01:19We're putting the smackdown on a peppercorn steak.
0:01:19 > 0:01:24Salt, pepper - no mucking around, just rub it on.
0:01:24 > 0:01:29The meat's already dead, you can't hurt it.
0:01:29 > 0:01:30OW!
0:01:30 > 0:01:33And cut.
0:01:33 > 0:01:38So, how do you like my new celebrity chef persona?
0:01:38 > 0:01:44Will it be a real attention grabber when I post it on my website?
0:01:44 > 0:01:47- Well?- 'They say honesty is the best policy
0:01:47 > 0:01:51'but everyone knows there are times when it's better to bend the truth.
0:01:51 > 0:01:54It's, er...certainly different.
0:01:54 > 0:01:59- Yeah, but in a good way. - Really? You liked it?
0:01:59 > 0:02:02It was really, um...What's the word I'm looking for?
0:02:02 > 0:02:07- Bad?- 'Everyone, that is, except monsters.'
0:02:07 > 0:02:11Oh, dear. You guys have so much to learn.
0:02:11 > 0:02:15But mummy human person thingy was bad. What should we have done?
0:02:15 > 0:02:19Lied! Made something up. Not told the truth.
0:02:19 > 0:02:23Why wouldn't we tell the truth? She reeked!
0:02:23 > 0:02:25But you hurt her feelings.
0:02:25 > 0:02:29You make up something harmless. It's called a white lie.
0:02:29 > 0:02:31They come in different colours?
0:02:31 > 0:02:37This is more complicated than that 'spray glue isn't deodorant' fiasco.
0:02:37 > 0:02:39Humans lie all the time.
0:02:39 > 0:02:44There are everyday fibs, which get you out of trouble.
0:02:44 > 0:02:47I'll show you.
0:02:47 > 0:02:52Oh, look - a half-eaten packet of cheese crackers.
0:02:52 > 0:02:54Pity they were contaminated by nuclear waste
0:02:54 > 0:02:58- and are completely inedible. - MONSTERS: Oh...!
0:02:59 > 0:03:02Ha-ha! I lied and you totally bought it.
0:03:02 > 0:03:03They're fine!
0:03:03 > 0:03:06Whoa! That's impressive!
0:03:06 > 0:03:08I still would have eaten them.
0:03:08 > 0:03:09Biddy-bo-bar. Yum.
0:03:09 > 0:03:12Anyway, that's fibs and then at the top of the tree
0:03:12 > 0:03:15you've got your great big whoppers
0:03:15 > 0:03:18aka humungo lies.
0:03:18 > 0:03:21- Ooh, sounds dangerous.- Bo-bad-oh!
0:03:21 > 0:03:23Like what?
0:03:23 > 0:03:25Take the time I blamed my cousin Horace
0:03:25 > 0:03:28for smashing up the greenhouse when it was me.
0:03:28 > 0:03:29Pfffrrrt!
0:03:29 > 0:03:33You big liar! Let me get this straight,
0:03:33 > 0:03:37I'd be lying if I said something like...
0:03:37 > 0:03:39"Oh, Haggis."
0:03:39 > 0:03:43Aaargh! My horns are on fire! My horns are on fire!
0:03:43 > 0:03:46- Aaargh! Oh-oh! Oh!- Haggis, relax.
0:03:46 > 0:03:50Fiend was just winding you up. He's lying!
0:03:50 > 0:03:54Your horns aren't really on fire.
0:03:54 > 0:03:56No...but your bum is!
0:03:56 > 0:03:58Aaaaargh!
0:03:58 > 0:03:59Aaah!
0:03:59 > 0:04:02Oh-oh-oh!
0:04:02 > 0:04:05It's like I never truly knew what fun was until now.
0:04:05 > 0:04:08You're not on fire. Come on!
0:04:08 > 0:04:11Wait, Eddie. Before the circus leaves town,
0:04:11 > 0:04:13I'd like to ask you a question.
0:04:13 > 0:04:15Where's my MP3 player?
0:04:15 > 0:04:17It's in the sitting room!
0:04:21 > 0:04:25Quickly, tell me where it is, that music-making thing I lent you.
0:04:25 > 0:04:27Er, I gave it to Haggis.
0:04:28 > 0:04:29I gave it to Norman.
0:04:31 > 0:04:33Brrrr-buck-bah-wah.
0:04:33 > 0:04:35- Eddie, I can't find it!- >
0:04:36 > 0:04:38OK, follow my lead.
0:04:39 > 0:04:41Did you hear wh...?
0:04:41 > 0:04:43Oh. Oh, Eddie?
0:04:43 > 0:04:45Ow!
0:04:45 > 0:04:47Oh, it's on my knee.
0:04:47 > 0:04:51Haggis, that's the last time I try to give you a piggyback.
0:04:51 > 0:04:53Hmm?
0:04:53 > 0:04:56Er...look, Eddie,
0:04:56 > 0:04:59my MP3 isn't in the sitting room, so...
0:04:59 > 0:05:02Oh, that's right! It's in the basement.
0:05:02 > 0:05:05I'll get it when my knee's better.
0:05:05 > 0:05:07- I'll get it myself. - No, you can't! Ow!
0:05:07 > 0:05:10Oh, I mean...you wouldn't want to.
0:05:10 > 0:05:14I left it between Norman's nose-hair sculpture
0:05:14 > 0:05:16and Haggis's snot mountain.
0:05:16 > 0:05:21I'm going to the library at 5pm and either my MP3 comes with me,
0:05:21 > 0:05:24or you'll be limping on the other leg too. Understood?
0:05:24 > 0:05:26Sure, Ange. Come on, boys.
0:05:26 > 0:05:31Help me to the chair before I pass out from the agony.
0:05:36 > 0:05:38Eddie, is your knee better?
0:05:38 > 0:05:41Is he EVER going to get this?
0:05:41 > 0:05:43Once he forgot how to blink for three weeks!
0:05:43 > 0:05:46That was an emergency lie to buy some time.
0:05:46 > 0:05:50We need to split up and search this place from top to bottom.
0:05:50 > 0:05:52We've only got two hours.
0:05:53 > 0:05:55OK, monsters. You heard Eddie -
0:05:55 > 0:05:59let's make this fast, efficient and above all, stealthy.
0:05:59 > 0:06:01Crub-a-dub-bool.
0:06:10 > 0:06:11What are you doing?
0:06:13 > 0:06:17E-e-e-e-e-e-e-er....
0:06:17 > 0:06:19Well?
0:06:19 > 0:06:21A-hem! The reason that we're in here
0:06:21 > 0:06:24is quite simple.
0:06:24 > 0:06:27Eddie wanted us to get him...
0:06:27 > 0:06:29- a book!- Which book?
0:06:33 > 0:06:35The Beginner's Guide To Ballet.
0:06:35 > 0:06:37Yeah, what you said.
0:06:39 > 0:06:41Guys, did you find that...?
0:06:41 > 0:06:43Did they find the ballet book?
0:06:43 > 0:06:46They did, but you don't need a book. And...bend, two, three.
0:06:46 > 0:06:49Turn, two, three. Straight back, Haggis!
0:06:49 > 0:06:52Did the monsters put something in your coffee again?
0:06:52 > 0:06:54No, you don't need a book because you have me.
0:06:54 > 0:06:56The monsters told me everything.
0:06:56 > 0:07:01When I was your age, my friends used to call me the prince of the plie.
0:07:01 > 0:07:06Kids can be cruel. I wouldn't worry about it.
0:07:06 > 0:07:09Swan Lake, Sleeping Beauty, Romeo And Juliet.
0:07:09 > 0:07:13I was third reserve understudy for them all.
0:07:13 > 0:07:14Straight back, Haggis!
0:07:14 > 0:07:16Psst! Eddie!
0:07:16 > 0:07:20We only told one little fib and now he's gone all happy-faced freaky!
0:07:20 > 0:07:21You've got to help us!
0:07:21 > 0:07:23No talking during practice!
0:07:23 > 0:07:25Eddie, if you had a secret passion for ballet,
0:07:25 > 0:07:27all you had to do was tell me.
0:07:27 > 0:07:30There's nothing better for building strength and balance.
0:07:30 > 0:07:33Secret passion for ballet?
0:07:35 > 0:07:36Oh, yeah!
0:07:36 > 0:07:38Ballet, that's right!
0:07:38 > 0:07:40I'm mad for it!
0:07:41 > 0:07:43There's, er, something in my eye.
0:07:43 > 0:07:47Well, go ahead, son. Release the beauty within! Express yourself!
0:07:47 > 0:07:51CLASSICAL PIANO MUSIC PLAYS
0:07:57 > 0:07:59Well, practice makes perfect, I guess.
0:07:59 > 0:08:01I hope. I know!
0:08:01 > 0:08:02I'll get out the photographs of me
0:08:02 > 0:08:06as peasant number three from The Nutcracker to inspire you.
0:08:06 > 0:08:07What a production!
0:08:11 > 0:08:12Keep at it, Eddie!
0:08:14 > 0:08:17Fiend, leave the lying to me, OK?
0:08:17 > 0:08:21If you want to help, get looking for Angela's MP3 player now!
0:08:23 > 0:08:24Oh, Eddie?
0:08:24 > 0:08:29I do hope your knee injury doesn't interfere with your ballet.
0:08:29 > 0:08:31I'll check the basement again.
0:08:31 > 0:08:34Kate, have you seen the album with the...?
0:08:36 > 0:08:41Welcome to Passion Fruits. I'm Kate Carlson.
0:08:41 > 0:08:45Sit down. Relax. Make yourself comfortable.
0:08:45 > 0:08:48Today we're cooking up an amorous assortment
0:08:48 > 0:08:50of oysters and truffles dipped in...
0:08:50 > 0:08:51em...
0:08:51 > 0:08:52ketchup.
0:08:52 > 0:08:54Mum, Dad, have you seen...?
0:08:54 > 0:08:57Oh! Thank goodness I caught you before you actually started kissing.
0:08:57 > 0:08:59Is it safe to look yet?
0:08:59 > 0:09:03Sure. I'm just trying out my new cooking persona. Does it suit me?
0:09:03 > 0:09:04You want the truth?
0:09:04 > 0:09:08- Not really. - Then, yes, it really suits you.
0:09:09 > 0:09:11Eddie's in the sitting room.
0:09:11 > 0:09:12Oh, gross!
0:09:12 > 0:09:14- FIEND:- Hey, Angela!
0:09:14 > 0:09:19- What a pleasant surprise!- Where's my MP3 player, you overgrown amphibian?
0:09:19 > 0:09:23Eddie told us to look for it in here cos he's completely lost...
0:09:23 > 0:09:25..His mind!
0:09:25 > 0:09:28OK, I'll go down to the basement and get it myself.
0:09:28 > 0:09:31- Wait!- Why?
0:09:31 > 0:09:32Em...let me see now.
0:09:32 > 0:09:34OK, you can't go down there...
0:09:34 > 0:09:36because...Norman...
0:09:36 > 0:09:40is...hibernating. Mm, not bad.
0:09:40 > 0:09:42- Oh, he's hibernating.- Mm.
0:09:42 > 0:09:43Yeah, in summer.
0:09:43 > 0:09:46Yes, well, it's not so much of a hibernation,
0:09:46 > 0:09:50more of a fur-shedding monster thing.
0:09:50 > 0:09:52It's not a pretty sight.
0:09:52 > 0:09:55Makes him very...bitey.
0:09:55 > 0:09:56Whatever.
0:09:56 > 0:09:58OK, so I know you liked it,
0:09:58 > 0:10:02but I just don't think the kitchen-seductress thing is me.
0:10:02 > 0:10:04For the record, I disagree.
0:10:04 > 0:10:06But what about food-fusion scientist?
0:10:06 > 0:10:08Bacon-flavoured ice cream,
0:10:08 > 0:10:10chocolate-coated squid rings...
0:10:10 > 0:10:12- Er...- Great!
0:10:12 > 0:10:16I knew you'd like it! I'll go dig out my old lab coat.
0:10:16 > 0:10:20Kate Carlson, professor of mad flavours!
0:10:21 > 0:10:26I'm lucky I don't have embarrassing parents like some people(!)
0:10:36 > 0:10:38Aargh! How do you do that?!
0:10:38 > 0:10:41- It's the ballet.- Doodle-oodle-oom.
0:10:41 > 0:10:43Keeps us light on our feet.
0:10:43 > 0:10:46I searched all the boxes on this side of the room,
0:10:46 > 0:10:47- so you search over there...- Eddie...
0:10:47 > 0:10:50- Look under stuff as well as on top of it...- Eddie...
0:10:50 > 0:10:52We've only got an hour left...
0:10:52 > 0:10:53Thank, Norm.
0:10:53 > 0:10:55Angela's coming!
0:10:55 > 0:10:58- DOOR OPENS - That'll be her now! Hide!
0:11:03 > 0:11:04Hello?
0:11:04 > 0:11:06Norman?
0:11:06 > 0:11:09I'm... I'm just looking for my MP3 player
0:11:09 > 0:11:12and I will be out of your way as soon as possible.
0:11:12 > 0:11:15- I know you're hibernating. - (Hibernating?!)
0:11:15 > 0:11:16(Pretty good, huh?)
0:11:21 > 0:11:23PFFFRRRRT!
0:11:23 > 0:11:27Norman?! Well, it's better out than in, I suppose.
0:11:27 > 0:11:32THUNDEROUS PFFFFRRRRT!
0:11:32 > 0:11:33Oh, forget it!
0:11:38 > 0:11:40That was too close!
0:11:40 > 0:11:42Yeah, she nearly caught us!
0:11:42 > 0:11:45No, I mean THAT was too close.
0:11:45 > 0:11:48What are we going to do about Angela's MP3 player?
0:11:48 > 0:11:50That's the problem with lying -
0:11:50 > 0:11:52once you start, it's harder than you think to stop.
0:11:52 > 0:11:55Like licking your armpits.
0:11:56 > 0:12:01I said, "Don't worry, Eddie! We will not rest until we've found it!"
0:12:01 > 0:12:02Burble-broo.
0:12:05 > 0:12:07Mmmm. Num-num.
0:12:10 > 0:12:11- THEY GASP - Booga-booda!
0:12:11 > 0:12:14Care to tell me what you're doing in here, chaps?
0:12:14 > 0:12:16Er, nothing. Looking for something.
0:12:16 > 0:12:18- What?- Er...
0:12:19 > 0:12:20Monster fleas!
0:12:20 > 0:12:22Where did that come from?
0:12:22 > 0:12:25- Fleas?!- Yeah, Haggis has monster fleas.
0:12:25 > 0:12:28- I don't have fleas!- There's one!
0:12:28 > 0:12:29Ow!
0:12:29 > 0:12:30They're biters, too.
0:12:30 > 0:12:33Oh, great(!) Do me a favour, don't tell Nick -
0:12:33 > 0:12:35he'll want to fumigate the whole house.
0:12:35 > 0:12:40So...who else might have come in contact with these monster fleas?
0:12:40 > 0:12:42Em...
0:12:45 > 0:12:47EDDIE: Oh, wait. Don't tell me.
0:12:47 > 0:12:50I'm thinking monster fleas?
0:12:50 > 0:12:54That's right. Apparently they're so big you can hear them breathing.
0:12:54 > 0:12:56- Fiend's been telling me all about it.- Yeah!
0:12:56 > 0:12:59He's helpful like that(!)
0:12:59 > 0:13:02Oh, no! I'd better was the bed sheets as well!
0:13:05 > 0:13:09So, Eddie, am I a master liar or what?!
0:13:09 > 0:13:11This is getting way out of hand!
0:13:11 > 0:13:14- Just tell me you found it.- No,
0:13:14 > 0:13:18but we have a brilliant plan to help Norm remember where he left it.
0:13:18 > 0:13:20Bim-bo-ah!
0:13:21 > 0:13:26You are feeling very sleepy.
0:13:26 > 0:13:28Oh-munna-bowie-oh-wee!
0:13:28 > 0:13:29Come on, we're running out of time!
0:13:29 > 0:13:33- Never rush a hypnotism. - I'll give you a cheese cracker.
0:13:35 > 0:13:36And...he's under.
0:13:36 > 0:13:38Ha-ha-ha!
0:13:38 > 0:13:42Norman, we need you to remember where you were last using the MP3 player.
0:13:42 > 0:13:45Ah-boo-bah-boo-heeda. Pffrrt! Uh-bee-boo.
0:13:45 > 0:13:47He put it in your jeans.
0:13:47 > 0:13:50Good! Good! Which jeans?
0:13:50 > 0:13:53Ba-biddy-ba-boo-bah-ba-bee-bay. Maaaah!
0:13:53 > 0:13:56The jeans Mum is about to put in the washing machine.
0:13:56 > 0:13:58Yes!
0:13:58 > 0:13:59Haboo-ba-bee-boo.
0:13:59 > 0:14:01Hello.
0:14:03 > 0:14:08Oh, maybe I should throw the cushion covers in while I'm at it.
0:14:09 > 0:14:12Eddie? It's 4.55.
0:14:12 > 0:14:13No sweat!
0:14:15 > 0:14:16What?!
0:14:16 > 0:14:18Gobbedy-goo. Gobbedy-gah.
0:14:18 > 0:14:19Not practising?
0:14:19 > 0:14:23Oh! Ballet, two, three, four.
0:14:23 > 0:14:25That's better, that's better.
0:14:25 > 0:14:26Hey, check this out!
0:14:26 > 0:14:28I found them - my old ballet pumps.
0:14:28 > 0:14:29HE SNIFFS
0:14:29 > 0:14:31Mmmm! Pretty cool, huh?
0:14:31 > 0:14:36- Er, that's...nice, Dad. Thanks. - Hey and guess what else?
0:14:36 > 0:14:39I just booked you into your first proper...
0:14:39 > 0:14:41- ballet lesson!- You've what?!
0:14:41 > 0:14:44In half an hour. I practically had to bribe the teacher to get you in,
0:14:44 > 0:14:48but when she heard it was your passion... Well... Come on!
0:14:48 > 0:14:49You can change in the car!
0:14:49 > 0:14:52Er, the thing is, Dad...
0:14:52 > 0:14:54- ANGELA:- Time's up, Eddie!- >
0:14:54 > 0:14:57..you've made my dreams come true. See you in the car.
0:14:58 > 0:15:00OK, guys, it's up to you now.
0:15:00 > 0:15:03You HAVE to get that MP3 player before I get back
0:15:03 > 0:15:05or I'm dead meat.
0:15:05 > 0:15:08You can count on us, Eddie. We're all over it!
0:15:08 > 0:15:10Snack first?
0:15:10 > 0:15:11Nom-nom.
0:15:15 > 0:15:19- Anything?- Nothing and we've looked everywhere!
0:15:19 > 0:15:22- Burdle-bah-by-beebo?- Tidy up?
0:15:22 > 0:15:23Yeah, I suppose.
0:15:23 > 0:15:24Dessert first?
0:15:24 > 0:15:27MUM: What is going on here?
0:15:27 > 0:15:29- Did you do this?- Er...
0:15:29 > 0:15:32I cannot tell a lie, it was...
0:15:33 > 0:15:34..n't us!
0:15:34 > 0:15:36It was...
0:15:36 > 0:15:37er...cousin!
0:15:37 > 0:15:41Yes, that's right. Cousin...Herman.
0:15:41 > 0:15:44- Ba-doo-ba-duh.- Who is Cousin Herman?
0:15:44 > 0:15:47He's our cousin. Clue's in the name!
0:15:47 > 0:15:50And we thought you were the smart one?!
0:15:50 > 0:15:54Yes, but... I mean, come on. How did he get here?
0:15:54 > 0:15:58Are you kidding?! Cousin Herman can go anywhere he wants to!
0:15:58 > 0:16:01Well, how come you've never mentioned him before?
0:16:01 > 0:16:03Erm...
0:16:03 > 0:16:05- Em...- Erm...
0:16:05 > 0:16:06That's right, Norm!
0:16:06 > 0:16:10We were scared you might like him more than you like us.
0:16:10 > 0:16:13So where is this Cousin Herman then?
0:16:13 > 0:16:16- Er...- Haggis?- Huh?
0:16:16 > 0:16:20Herman? Herman...is...is...
0:16:20 > 0:16:22is in the...
0:16:25 > 0:16:27- In the basement?- Hmm.- Yeah!
0:16:27 > 0:16:30Well, that explains the funny noises down there.
0:16:30 > 0:16:32I knew Norman wasn't hibernating.
0:16:32 > 0:16:36And the giant fleas came from Herman too, I suppose?
0:16:36 > 0:16:39That works. I mean, yeah, exactly!
0:16:39 > 0:16:44I know! I know we should have told you about him earlier,
0:16:44 > 0:16:45but it's just that,
0:16:45 > 0:16:48while Cousin Herman is the brilliantest monster ever,
0:16:48 > 0:16:49he's very shy, you see.
0:16:49 > 0:16:54He gets a little jittery around humans and he's been known to...
0:16:54 > 0:16:57Well, you know.
0:16:57 > 0:16:59Uh... Ha-ha, er...
0:16:59 > 0:17:01Booble-doo grob-golly blurg.
0:17:01 > 0:17:02NORMAN GROWLS AND ROARS
0:17:02 > 0:17:03Hazzy-collaty!
0:17:03 > 0:17:05NORMAN ROARS FEROCIOUSLY
0:17:05 > 0:17:06Blabbity-blah-buloo!
0:17:06 > 0:17:08TOGETHER: Eat them?!
0:17:08 > 0:17:10Truthfully?
0:17:10 > 0:17:11Yes.
0:17:11 > 0:17:13At least we know what to expect now.
0:17:13 > 0:17:15Thank you for telling us the truth, Fiend.
0:17:15 > 0:17:16Any time, Kate.
0:17:16 > 0:17:18Any time.
0:17:21 > 0:17:24Why didn't you warn me, Dad?
0:17:24 > 0:17:26Ballet's brutal!
0:17:26 > 0:17:28Like my dance teacher always said,
0:17:28 > 0:17:31"If you can't stand the chafing, stay out of the dance studio."
0:17:32 > 0:17:33I'll run you a bath.
0:17:37 > 0:17:38Oh, hey, Eddie!
0:17:38 > 0:17:43Wow, your fake limping is getting really realistic!
0:17:43 > 0:17:45Please just tell me you found the MP3.
0:17:45 > 0:17:47Even better!
0:17:48 > 0:17:51Fiend!
0:17:51 > 0:17:52What have you done?!
0:17:52 > 0:17:54Ha-ha-haaa!
0:17:55 > 0:17:58Yes, we know you've been lying, Eddie.
0:17:58 > 0:18:00All right, all right, I admit it.
0:18:00 > 0:18:01I completely lost...
0:18:01 > 0:18:06A fight with Cousin Herman and he ate my MP3 player.
0:18:06 > 0:18:08Huh?
0:18:08 > 0:18:09Don't worry, Eddie.
0:18:09 > 0:18:12The monsters have been telling us all about their troublesome guest.
0:18:12 > 0:18:17It completely explains all the weird stuff that's happened today.
0:18:17 > 0:18:19Well, I guess it does.
0:18:19 > 0:18:22(Cousin Herman. Nice one, fiend.)
0:18:22 > 0:18:27Oh! Oh! I know! Why don't we invite Cousin Herman up for tea?
0:18:27 > 0:18:28What?! No!
0:18:28 > 0:18:31Why not? He loves meeting new people.
0:18:31 > 0:18:33No, he doesn't.
0:18:33 > 0:18:35Yes, he... Whose cousin is he anyway?!
0:18:35 > 0:18:39Well, I suppose we should see who we're dealing with.
0:18:39 > 0:18:40OK, Fiend,
0:18:40 > 0:18:43Cousin Herman is coming to tea.
0:18:43 > 0:18:47You know, Fiend, that was going really, really well
0:18:47 > 0:18:48right up to the part
0:18:48 > 0:18:52- where you invited your make-believe cousin to tea!- Yeah,
0:18:52 > 0:18:55I thought that was a boo-boo too for a second,
0:18:55 > 0:18:57but check this out!
0:18:57 > 0:19:01Oh, Cousin Herman!
0:19:01 > 0:19:05NORMAN SINGS A FANFARE
0:19:08 > 0:19:10Grrrr!
0:19:10 > 0:19:13Raaargh!
0:19:13 > 0:19:15Grrrr!
0:19:17 > 0:19:18Oh, wait!
0:19:18 > 0:19:22- You're right, that's totally convincing(!)- Really?
0:19:22 > 0:19:24No, I'm lying!
0:19:24 > 0:19:27That's the final one. No more! I'm finished with the fibs.
0:19:27 > 0:19:29Is that another lie?
0:19:29 > 0:19:32No! Sorry, guys, but this fib is all yours.
0:19:32 > 0:19:34Good luck.
0:19:39 > 0:19:42So, to recap, rule number one...?
0:19:42 > 0:19:46No direct eye contact with Cousin Herman.
0:19:46 > 0:19:47Rule number two?
0:19:47 > 0:19:50Keep your bubble wrap X-ray vision blocker
0:19:50 > 0:19:54and your anti-mind-control hat on at all times.
0:19:54 > 0:19:55Rule number three!
0:19:55 > 0:19:59# We must sing our questions in a show-tunes style. #
0:19:59 > 0:20:00Why is that again?
0:20:00 > 0:20:03What can I say? The guy loves musicals!
0:20:03 > 0:20:04OK, ready?
0:20:04 > 0:20:07Norman, lights.
0:20:07 > 0:20:08Bobble-bob-dob.
0:20:10 > 0:20:13Cousin Herman!
0:20:13 > 0:20:15Herman? Come in, Herman.
0:20:16 > 0:20:20Grrrrraaaaaarrrrrgh!
0:20:20 > 0:20:23Grrrrooooaaaarrrr!
0:20:23 > 0:20:26Rrrrrraaaaaarrrrgh!
0:20:26 > 0:20:28SMASH!
0:20:28 > 0:20:30Ha-ha-ha!
0:20:30 > 0:20:32Oh, good old clumsy Cousin Herman.
0:20:32 > 0:20:35Did I mention he was clumsy as well as shy?
0:20:35 > 0:20:39# Hello, Herman Welcome to our home. #
0:20:39 > 0:20:43Grrrrraaaaaoooorrrrgh!
0:20:43 > 0:20:45Herman says, "Thanks, I really like it
0:20:45 > 0:20:49"and sorry for the damp rug in the study.
0:20:49 > 0:20:53"It was a long journey and I was busting to make the pee-pee."
0:20:53 > 0:20:54- He what?!- Eyes on the floor!
0:20:54 > 0:20:57# I'm sorry, very sorry Please don't eat me. #
0:20:57 > 0:21:00And one final question.
0:21:00 > 0:21:03# Do you need any powder for your monster fleas? #
0:21:03 > 0:21:05Fleas?! Have I got fleas?!
0:21:05 > 0:21:07I... I think I have!
0:21:07 > 0:21:12- No! No, wait, Haggis! I mean Herman! - I'm confused! Who am I again?
0:21:12 > 0:21:15I don't know what's true any more!
0:21:15 > 0:21:17SMASH!
0:21:17 > 0:21:18CRASH!
0:21:18 > 0:21:20SMASHING AND SCREAMING
0:21:20 > 0:21:22- Aaargh! - THUMP!
0:21:25 > 0:21:26ALL: Haggis?!
0:21:26 > 0:21:30Oh, Haggis?! Whoa, that's very surprising!
0:21:30 > 0:21:32But you made me wear the costume, Fiend.
0:21:32 > 0:21:36Stop the lies, Haggis. You're only making it worse for yourself.
0:21:36 > 0:21:38What's going on, Eddie?
0:21:38 > 0:21:40It's all been one big fib.
0:21:40 > 0:21:43My knee, the ballet, the fleas...
0:21:43 > 0:21:48I just didn't want Angela to find out I lost her MP3 player, all right?!
0:21:48 > 0:21:53I'm in trouble, I'm grounded, I'm exhausted. Fine!
0:21:53 > 0:21:56You're telling us you made all this up
0:21:56 > 0:21:59just because you lost Angela's MP3 player?
0:21:59 > 0:22:00Pull the other one!
0:22:00 > 0:22:04Normally I'd believe you, Eddie, but I saw your face at ballet today.
0:22:04 > 0:22:08No-one can fake that kind of raw passion.
0:22:08 > 0:22:10That was a sprained ankle.
0:22:10 > 0:22:13Nice try, Eddie, but you're not that good at lying.
0:22:13 > 0:22:16But I'm telling the truth! Ask Haggis.
0:22:16 > 0:22:19He doesn't even know what lying is. Tell them, Haggis.
0:22:28 > 0:22:31Cousin Herman...
0:22:31 > 0:22:32is real!
0:22:32 > 0:22:36He ate Angela's MP3 player,
0:22:36 > 0:22:38hurt Eddie's knee, messed up the house,
0:22:38 > 0:22:42spread fleas everywhere then left without even saying goodbye.
0:22:42 > 0:22:44We didn't want you to miss meeting him,
0:22:44 > 0:22:48so I dressed up as Herman instead.
0:22:49 > 0:22:53I'm sorry we LIED.
0:22:53 > 0:22:56He did it. He actually did a big humungo one!
0:22:56 > 0:22:58I'm so proud!
0:22:58 > 0:23:00Eddie, why didn't you just
0:23:00 > 0:23:03tell us the truth in the first place, like Haggis?
0:23:03 > 0:23:09Honesty really is the best policy. Eddie, if you really...
0:23:09 > 0:23:12All right! OK, I admit it.
0:23:12 > 0:23:15I really do love ballet.
0:23:20 > 0:23:23Hi there and welcome to Kate In The Kitchen,
0:23:23 > 0:23:27the online cookery course that tells you the truth about cooking at home.
0:23:27 > 0:23:29Let's eat!
0:23:29 > 0:23:30And cut. That was great!
0:23:30 > 0:23:34Yeah, Mum. You're really good when you're natural.
0:23:34 > 0:23:36Thank you, sweetie. What do you think, guys?
0:23:36 > 0:23:38Honestly? It was...
0:23:38 > 0:23:39Brilliant!
0:23:41 > 0:23:44Here he is - the pirouette protege. How did it go, champ?
0:23:44 > 0:23:48Did you know you can strain toe muscles?
0:23:48 > 0:23:49Oh, yeah.
0:23:49 > 0:23:53- Er...- Norman, you had it all the time?!
0:23:53 > 0:23:54You big liar!
0:23:54 > 0:23:57Er, is that my MP3 player?
0:23:57 > 0:23:59I thought Cousin Herman ate it.
0:23:59 > 0:24:01Eddie?
0:24:02 > 0:24:03Here's what happened.
0:24:03 > 0:24:09Yes, erm, Cousin Herman accidentally dropped the MP3 player...
0:24:09 > 0:24:13EDDIE: 'Yeah, honesty might be the best policy,
0:24:13 > 0:24:16'but sometimes it's just not as much fun
0:24:16 > 0:24:19'as a really juicy monster-sized fib...'
0:24:19 > 0:24:22..and that's why Auntie Hermania redelivered
0:24:22 > 0:24:24the MP3 player down the chimney
0:24:24 > 0:24:26and now you've got it back, you see?
0:24:26 > 0:24:32See, I told you, a perfectly simple explanation.
0:24:32 > 0:24:34- FIEND PANTS - Urgh!
0:24:34 > 0:24:36THUMP!
0:24:36 > 0:24:38'..even if you don't always get away with it.'
0:24:46 > 0:24:48# Don't be sad and lonely
0:24:48 > 0:24:52# If you need someone to hold your hand
0:24:52 > 0:24:54# Me and my monsters care. #
0:24:54 > 0:24:57E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk