Fast and Furious

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0:00:02 > 0:00:06This is The Console. Pixelface games loading.

0:00:06 > 0:00:09# Life's so great in a console space

0:00:09 > 0:00:11# Digitally here again

0:00:11 > 0:00:14# So much more than a pixel face

0:00:14 > 0:00:16# Living in a game

0:00:16 > 0:00:18# Living in a game Living in a game

0:00:18 > 0:00:20# We're playing with the same old friends

0:00:20 > 0:00:23# Everybody knows our name

0:00:23 > 0:00:26# We'll be here till the journey ends

0:00:26 > 0:00:28# Living in a game

0:00:28 > 0:00:31# Living in a game Living in a game. #

0:00:33 > 0:00:37# Da da-da, da-da-da... #

0:00:37 > 0:00:39Ah!

0:00:39 > 0:00:41Speedby's Pear!

0:00:45 > 0:00:46Oh.

0:00:46 > 0:00:49It's a bit overripe. Erm...

0:00:50 > 0:00:52Oh, well.

0:00:56 > 0:00:57Wah!

0:01:09 > 0:01:11Thanks.

0:01:22 > 0:01:25Chilli flakes. Chilli flakes...

0:01:25 > 0:01:28Aw, who's gone and put the chilli flakes

0:01:28 > 0:01:30on the incredibly high shelf again?

0:01:30 > 0:01:32Alexia? You couldn't just...?

0:01:32 > 0:01:35Oh, for goodness' sake!

0:01:43 > 0:01:45Thanks.

0:01:45 > 0:01:47Why do we even have that shelf anyway?

0:01:47 > 0:01:50Are you all right, Kiki?

0:01:50 > 0:01:53Everyone's like a superhero compared to me.

0:01:53 > 0:01:57Riley's incredibly strong, Alexia has amazing gymnastic abilities,

0:01:57 > 0:02:00and Claireparker, you're an amazing waitress.

0:02:00 > 0:02:03I'm not just a waitress. I also fight zombies.

0:02:03 > 0:02:06That's what I'm saying. You do all that zombie stuff

0:02:06 > 0:02:10but you've got amazing waitress skills too. It's really impressive.

0:02:10 > 0:02:12"Some zombie stuff"?

0:02:12 > 0:02:15Uh, I fight loads of zombies and I'm actually amazing at it.

0:02:15 > 0:02:16I didn't say you weren't.

0:02:16 > 0:02:20I mean, some days, I actually fight up to, like, 100 zombies, yeah?

0:02:20 > 0:02:24Proper zombies. Not just zombie rats or hamsters.

0:02:24 > 0:02:27Real, mean, nasty zombies.

0:02:27 > 0:02:28I'm trying to pay you a compliment!

0:02:28 > 0:02:31- Oh, right. - I could never do what you do.

0:02:31 > 0:02:33- I find zombies terrifying!- OK.

0:02:33 > 0:02:36And those coffee machines, they're very complicated.

0:02:36 > 0:02:39I just feel underpowered.

0:02:39 > 0:02:41Look, don't worry, Kiki.

0:02:41 > 0:02:44We'll always be here to help if you really need it.

0:02:44 > 0:02:47But I don't want to have to be helped all the time.

0:02:47 > 0:02:50I want to be able to do this stuff for myself.

0:02:50 > 0:02:53I just want to feel powerful!

0:02:53 > 0:02:54Life's so unfair!

0:02:57 > 0:02:59What are you doing?

0:02:59 > 0:03:02I'm throwing a tantrum, aren't I?!

0:03:02 > 0:03:04Trying to break those chopsticks?

0:03:04 > 0:03:06Yes, I'm trying to break the chopsticks!

0:03:06 > 0:03:08Well, do you need any help?

0:03:08 > 0:03:11- No, I can do it! - Here you go, Kiki. I'll get that.

0:03:15 > 0:03:17HE WHISTLES

0:03:17 > 0:03:20Aw, Kiki, I'm sure you'd have managed it yourself eventually.

0:03:20 > 0:03:22You definitely weakened them for him.

0:03:24 > 0:03:2798, 99...

0:03:27 > 0:03:28100!

0:03:29 > 0:03:31100 brushstrokes done,

0:03:31 > 0:03:33leave-in conditioner done,

0:03:33 > 0:03:35hot oil treatment done.

0:03:35 > 0:03:38Thank goodness I only do this twice a...

0:03:38 > 0:03:40What was that?

0:03:40 > 0:03:42I have no idea!

0:03:42 > 0:03:43Your hair's a bit...

0:03:45 > 0:03:46Aagh!

0:03:46 > 0:03:47Doh!

0:03:47 > 0:03:48Oh.

0:03:48 > 0:03:53One, two, three, four...

0:03:55 > 0:03:58Come on, Riley. Pull yourself together. We're missing the action.

0:03:58 > 0:04:02All right! I just need some time to...get my head right.

0:04:04 > 0:04:05Everything all right?

0:04:05 > 0:04:10- Ha! This chicken is worried about going online.- What's the problem?

0:04:10 > 0:04:14- It's online! Who knows what kind of weirdos are out there?- Weirdos?

0:04:14 > 0:04:17Your game's packed with cloned alien robots.

0:04:17 > 0:04:19How much more weird can it get?

0:04:19 > 0:04:21Yeah, but they're MY cloned alien robots.

0:04:21 > 0:04:25- Who knows what the ones online are like?- Oh, for goodness' sake!

0:04:25 > 0:04:28I thought you were supposed to be a big brave Marine.

0:04:28 > 0:04:30I am! I just need a minute

0:04:30 > 0:04:32to get in the zone.

0:04:32 > 0:04:36What, the "Buck-aw! Chick-chick-chicken!" zone?

0:04:36 > 0:04:39It's all right for you two! I've never been out there before!

0:04:39 > 0:04:42Look, you're right. Online is a scary place

0:04:42 > 0:04:46but you're a big, brave Marine. You'll be fine.

0:04:51 > 0:04:52It smells funny.

0:04:52 > 0:04:54Oh, you'll be fine!

0:04:54 > 0:04:56Just make sure you come back to the same port.

0:04:56 > 0:05:00- I just want to do it in my own time. - It'll be fine. Look.

0:05:00 > 0:05:02Whoa!

0:05:02 > 0:05:04Oof! It's all wet!

0:05:05 > 0:05:07Go on, Marine. Get in.

0:05:07 > 0:05:10You know, you can be really pushy sometimes.

0:05:10 > 0:05:14Oh, go and file a complaint with your drill sergeant!

0:05:14 > 0:05:15Mary Jane!

0:05:15 > 0:05:17Ow! Me cogs!

0:05:18 > 0:05:21This is not finished, Alexia.

0:05:21 > 0:05:25Mary Jane! Hold on, I'm coming!

0:05:25 > 0:05:27Ooh! Blimey! Get off me!

0:05:39 > 0:05:41You sure it was him?

0:05:41 > 0:05:44Yes, it was a red colour, and I was covered in hair when it left.

0:05:44 > 0:05:47- I think it's coming back. - Quick! Get the camera ready!

0:05:47 > 0:05:49All right, night mode? Portrait?

0:05:49 > 0:05:53Children or animals? That's a tricky one. Which do you think he is?

0:05:53 > 0:05:55Put it on sports mode! I'll put on red-eye reduction.

0:05:55 > 0:05:57Oh, here it comes! Take a photo!

0:05:59 > 0:06:00REX YELLS

0:06:02 > 0:06:04Ah! Well, it's definitely him!

0:06:10 > 0:06:13Oh! How did they get on there?

0:06:13 > 0:06:17There must be some sort of... someone having a joke! Ahem.

0:06:17 > 0:06:19Look, there's another one of Rex.

0:06:19 > 0:06:21Oh, he's writing in this one.

0:06:21 > 0:06:23REX HOLLERS

0:06:26 > 0:06:29"I am stuck on Turbo Mode and can't stop. Please help.

0:06:29 > 0:06:31"Will be back before you finish reading..."

0:06:31 > 0:06:33REX YELLS

0:06:33 > 0:06:34"..this note."

0:06:42 > 0:06:44Come on!

0:06:44 > 0:06:48Oh, come on, Riley, that's all of it done. I'm going to head back.

0:06:50 > 0:06:53Come on!

0:06:53 > 0:06:56- Is that the best you can do? - Come on, Riley. That's enough.

0:06:56 > 0:06:58- Come on, let's head home.- Oh, yeah?

0:07:00 > 0:07:03Come on, that's time up. It's time up, we've got to go.

0:07:03 > 0:07:07Just a few more minutes. I've just got a few more to get.

0:07:07 > 0:07:10Suit yourself. I'm off for an oily bath.

0:07:12 > 0:07:17Don't forget to come back through this portal when you're finished.

0:07:17 > 0:07:20OK, like that, is it? Yeah?

0:07:20 > 0:07:21Yeah!

0:07:21 > 0:07:24And don't talk about my mother like that again!

0:07:26 > 0:07:30Now, which one did I come through?

0:07:30 > 0:07:32Was it this one?

0:07:32 > 0:07:35Oh, it probably doesn't matter much anyway.

0:07:35 > 0:07:38'This is The Console. Portal violation detected.

0:07:38 > 0:07:40'Portal violation detected.'

0:07:54 > 0:07:56Oh! Alexia.

0:07:56 > 0:07:59- I need to talk to you about before. - Oh, dear, what is it?

0:07:59 > 0:08:02You can't chuck people's stuff around. We weren't ready.

0:08:02 > 0:08:05I really don't know what you're talking about.

0:08:05 > 0:08:07You chucked Romford through the portal.

0:08:07 > 0:08:10I don't know a Romford

0:08:10 > 0:08:12but whatever it is I've done to upset you,

0:08:12 > 0:08:14I'm really very sorry.

0:08:15 > 0:08:18Right. That's...a bit more like it.

0:08:23 > 0:08:24What...?

0:08:29 > 0:08:32- Claireparker, I'm sorry.- 'Bout what?

0:08:32 > 0:08:36- I made you spill your crisps.- Dah...

0:08:36 > 0:08:38You still have quite a lot of crisps.

0:08:38 > 0:08:41I'm going to be covered in zombie bits in about 20 minutes

0:08:41 > 0:08:42so what's the diff?

0:08:44 > 0:08:46How long have we had that vase?

0:08:46 > 0:08:49What do you mean? It's always been there.

0:08:49 > 0:08:51'Ere, listen, I'm going to have a bit of a nap.

0:08:51 > 0:08:54Wake me up... Actually, no, don't wake me up.

0:08:54 > 0:08:58(YORKSHIRE ACCENT) Alreet, lad? What kept you?

0:08:58 > 0:08:59Why are you talking like that?

0:08:59 > 0:09:02'Ere, Bradford, keep it down. I'm trying to have a nap!

0:09:02 > 0:09:06Bradford? What...? Oh, Sorry...

0:09:06 > 0:09:09Are you 'reet? You look like you don't even recognise me.

0:09:09 > 0:09:10Well, I...

0:09:10 > 0:09:13You must have taken a big plasma hit on your bonce in t'last round.

0:09:13 > 0:09:17- I think I might have made some sort of mistake.- Aye, 'appen tha did.

0:09:17 > 0:09:19Sit yourself down. I'll make us a cuppa.

0:09:21 > 0:09:25Oh, well, that'll be very nice. I mean, that'd be...reet grand.

0:09:25 > 0:09:28Why don't you put your feet up 'n' all?

0:09:28 > 0:09:31- What, you mean...- Aye, go on, lad. That's what I'm 'ere for.

0:09:31 > 0:09:33Switching to vibro-massage mode.

0:09:33 > 0:09:35AETHELWYNNE BELLOWS

0:09:35 > 0:09:36Ripley! Got you now!

0:09:36 > 0:09:38Ha-ha! What're you going to do, big man?

0:09:38 > 0:09:41What're you going to do now you're in the vice?

0:09:41 > 0:09:43Nothing! That's what!

0:09:43 > 0:09:45Hurgh!

0:09:45 > 0:09:47(STRANGLED VOICE) Aethelwynne?

0:09:47 > 0:09:49Yeah, I just totally unloaded on this troll.

0:09:49 > 0:09:51He was like, "You'll not cross my bridge!"

0:09:51 > 0:09:53I went, "We'll see about that."

0:09:53 > 0:09:57He was like, "I guess we will," and then I was like, boom!

0:09:57 > 0:10:00Knocked him off the bridge into the stream! It was like game over!

0:10:00 > 0:10:03Game over! Huh!

0:10:03 > 0:10:05That sounds...pretty cool?

0:10:05 > 0:10:06Oh, yeah, it was way cool.

0:10:06 > 0:10:09And he was like, "Oh, I made such a mistake

0:10:09 > 0:10:13"not respecting the A-man's awesomeness!"

0:10:13 > 0:10:14Believe!

0:10:14 > 0:10:18A-man - one! Troll - nil!

0:10:18 > 0:10:21Oh, Good Lord. Not another troll anecdote.

0:10:21 > 0:10:24Let we guess, you threw him off a bridge?

0:10:24 > 0:10:27Boom! Splash! Hnghh!

0:10:27 > 0:10:30Well, you certainly paint quite a picture.

0:10:30 > 0:10:32That's, what, the third troll-dunking this week?

0:10:32 > 0:10:36- The stream must be positively littered with the poor beasts.- Yeah!

0:10:36 > 0:10:40They're like, "I'm in a stream! I got pushed in by the A-man!

0:10:40 > 0:10:43"This is awful! Oh, no!" Rragh!

0:10:43 > 0:10:45Yes, well, your powers of expression astonish me.

0:10:45 > 0:10:50Now, if you'll excuse me, I have an appointment with my journal

0:10:50 > 0:10:53and this medley of Calville Rouge d'Automne,

0:10:53 > 0:10:57an exquisite eating variety with a smooth creamy texture and...

0:10:58 > 0:11:01..the most subtle strawberry overtones. Here.

0:11:01 > 0:11:05You may have one as well. Enjoy, Major.

0:11:05 > 0:11:07Ma...major?

0:11:07 > 0:11:09I'm a major?

0:11:09 > 0:11:13Well, of course you are. You're on 80,000 points.

0:11:13 > 0:11:17Are you all right, Major? You seem a little...odd.

0:11:18 > 0:11:19Yeah, I'm fine.

0:11:19 > 0:11:22I've never been better, actually.

0:11:22 > 0:11:25Switching to vibro-massage mode.

0:11:28 > 0:11:30Good here, isn't it?

0:11:30 > 0:11:32It's awesome!

0:11:32 > 0:11:35Rargh!

0:11:37 > 0:11:41This is it? This is my upgrade?

0:11:41 > 0:11:43More moon boots?

0:11:43 > 0:11:44Yep. Moon boots times two.

0:11:45 > 0:11:48All right. But what do they do?

0:11:48 > 0:11:52Well, whatever it is, they're doing it right now.

0:11:52 > 0:11:55These are rubbish! Haven't you got anything else for me?

0:11:55 > 0:11:58No.

0:11:59 > 0:12:01All I've got is Sgt Riley's upgrade.

0:12:01 > 0:12:04He was meant to come in and pick it up. Ergh!

0:12:07 > 0:12:08But he's not been in today.

0:12:08 > 0:12:10Can you do me a favour and drop it off?

0:12:12 > 0:12:13Wow.

0:12:13 > 0:12:15What's that?

0:12:15 > 0:12:18Well, this is...

0:12:19 > 0:12:22They're super high-tech XL pneumatic power gloves,

0:12:22 > 0:12:25a servo-enhanced exoskeletal ergo-adaptive

0:12:25 > 0:12:27power-assistance device.

0:12:29 > 0:12:32The only word I understood there was gloves!

0:12:34 > 0:12:37Mind how you go with them, because they're a wee bit heavy.

0:12:44 > 0:12:45Sure you'll be OK with that?

0:12:45 > 0:12:47- Yeah, I'll be fine!- OK.

0:13:14 > 0:13:17Yeah! 601!

0:13:17 > 0:13:19602!

0:13:19 > 0:13:21Yeah, amazing!

0:13:21 > 0:13:25It's great finally having someone to work out with.

0:13:25 > 0:13:29Yeah! Especially working out with me. I envy you, I really do.

0:13:29 > 0:13:31I've tidied up your quarters,

0:13:31 > 0:13:34done all your washing, and polished your extra set of body armour

0:13:34 > 0:13:37just to say I'm really very sorry for whatever it is I did.

0:13:37 > 0:13:41That's unusually considerate of you, Alexia, but you didn't have to...

0:13:41 > 0:13:44- do that?- Oh, come on, she loves to do that stuff.

0:13:44 > 0:13:48She does all my washing, although she doesn't have to iron my stuff

0:13:48 > 0:13:51because I just flex the creases out!

0:13:51 > 0:13:53Whoagh!

0:13:53 > 0:13:55Look at this!

0:13:55 > 0:13:57Wrinkle free!

0:13:57 > 0:14:00I mean, I get headaches sometimes, but that's normal, right?

0:14:05 > 0:14:07Oh, QM. I had a question for you...

0:14:07 > 0:14:11Aah! I mean, hello?

0:14:11 > 0:14:13What can I do for you, petal?

0:14:13 > 0:14:16Oh, I was just wondering what would hap...

0:14:16 > 0:14:19what would happen if a character from online

0:14:19 > 0:14:22went into the wrong console by mistake

0:14:22 > 0:14:24and wanted to stay there?

0:14:24 > 0:14:26Let's have a look, shall we?

0:14:27 > 0:14:31Right. Right.

0:14:31 > 0:14:34Well, according to this, he could stay there indefinitely

0:14:34 > 0:14:36but I've no idea why he'd want to.

0:14:36 > 0:14:39What if the new console was a lot better than his old one?

0:14:39 > 0:14:42I think all consoles are about the same, aren't they?

0:14:42 > 0:14:46Yeah... Yeah, you'd be surprised.

0:14:48 > 0:14:51ROBOTIC STRIDES

0:14:57 > 0:14:59She says they were an upgrade

0:14:59 > 0:15:01but I don't see where they fit into her game.

0:15:18 > 0:15:20Chilli flakes. Chilli flakes...

0:15:20 > 0:15:22Do you want me to get them?

0:15:22 > 0:15:24Oh, no. I can do it.

0:15:35 > 0:15:39Oh! Alexia, I was going to sit there.

0:15:39 > 0:15:41Well, there are other chairs!

0:15:43 > 0:15:47Ah! OK, this one's fine here too!

0:15:53 > 0:15:56You see, to the outside observer,

0:15:56 > 0:15:59the individual is perceived to be travelling extremely quickly

0:15:59 > 0:16:01whilst on Speed Boost.

0:16:01 > 0:16:06However, from my point of view, time is moving relatively slowly.

0:16:06 > 0:16:09The subject of time is subjective.

0:16:09 > 0:16:12Right. Like how this conversation feels like normal speed to you,

0:16:12 > 0:16:15but to me, it feels incredibly slow.

0:16:15 > 0:16:20- Ah, your tactics have let you down today, Major Riley.- Eh?

0:16:20 > 0:16:22Checkmate!

0:16:22 > 0:16:25- Were we playing chess?- Of course.

0:16:25 > 0:16:28As you know, we play for three hours every day.

0:16:28 > 0:16:29Three hours?

0:16:29 > 0:16:32Every...day. Would you care for a rematch?

0:16:33 > 0:16:36Chess match is over! Go time!

0:16:36 > 0:16:39I see you're playing your traditional opening move,

0:16:39 > 0:16:40the Idiot's Gambit.

0:16:40 > 0:16:44Move over, furbrain! Come on, Major! Let's arm-wrestle!

0:16:44 > 0:16:48I will crush you! Let's go!

0:16:48 > 0:16:51I do not want to arm-wrestle you.

0:16:51 > 0:16:53You hear that, boys?

0:16:53 > 0:16:55We beat him in the mind!

0:16:55 > 0:16:58Default victory to the A-man!

0:16:58 > 0:17:02Yes, they fear the guns! They are right to fear the guns!

0:17:02 > 0:17:04Hurrgh!

0:17:04 > 0:17:07You know what? I might just go and...do the washing up.

0:17:07 > 0:17:10- It's beginning to smell a bit. - I wouldn't bother.

0:17:10 > 0:17:13Someone else will do it.

0:17:13 > 0:17:14You want to do another set?

0:17:14 > 0:17:17I could go a couple of hours. Want to spot me?

0:17:17 > 0:17:19No, I...I'm exhausted.

0:17:19 > 0:17:22Why don't you get Kiki to give you a shoulder rub?

0:17:22 > 0:17:25Did someone say shoulder rub?

0:17:25 > 0:17:27That's your Kiki?

0:17:27 > 0:17:29What you trying to say, mate?

0:17:29 > 0:17:33Alexia! Alexia!

0:17:33 > 0:17:35I'm just going to head off.

0:17:35 > 0:17:36Yes, Claireparker?

0:17:36 > 0:17:40The place is looking like a tip. Do the tidying up, would ya?

0:17:40 > 0:17:43Um...

0:17:43 > 0:17:45Well, I suppose I could.

0:17:48 > 0:17:52That's my power shake! Get off my power shake!

0:17:52 > 0:17:54Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry!

0:17:54 > 0:17:57I...I'm just sorry.

0:17:57 > 0:18:00Wurgh! Ooh!

0:18:00 > 0:18:01I'm just really sorry.

0:18:01 > 0:18:05Urgh! Huh! Whurgh!

0:18:07 > 0:18:11Here come the frogs! Ugh! Ooh!

0:18:24 > 0:18:26I think you'll find that's my seat.

0:18:26 > 0:18:29Oh, don't be silly, Kiki. I always sit here.

0:18:29 > 0:18:30Wah!

0:18:30 > 0:18:32What's that around your neck?

0:18:32 > 0:18:34It's my amulet!

0:18:34 > 0:18:37Hmm. It's pretty. I like it.

0:18:37 > 0:18:39Ah! My amulet!

0:18:39 > 0:18:41What?

0:18:44 > 0:18:45Ha-ha-ha!

0:18:47 > 0:18:50Ah-ha-ha-ha!

0:18:51 > 0:18:53Alexia!

0:18:53 > 0:18:55- Why are you so nervous all the time?- Oh, am I?

0:18:55 > 0:18:59I don't know. It's fine, though.

0:18:59 > 0:19:01I don't want to make any trouble.

0:19:01 > 0:19:03It's not about making trouble.

0:19:03 > 0:19:06It's about, you know, standing up for yourself.

0:19:06 > 0:19:11Kiki. Kiki! How many times have I told you? Could you stop that?

0:19:11 > 0:19:13Why do you let them treat you like that?

0:19:13 > 0:19:16You're an amazing person.

0:19:16 > 0:19:20- Oh, I don't know about that. - Course you are. You're dead smart.

0:19:20 > 0:19:24- Well, I do have a couple of degrees, I suppose.- There you are.

0:19:24 > 0:19:26And you're a brilliant gymnast.

0:19:26 > 0:19:28Oh, I do the odd flic-flac, that's all.

0:19:28 > 0:19:33And you're so well-travelled. You're a very sophisticated person, Alexia.

0:19:33 > 0:19:36Oh. I suppose I am.

0:19:36 > 0:19:38And you're so well spoken.

0:19:38 > 0:19:41Yes! That's true.

0:19:41 > 0:19:44I've never thought about this stuff before.

0:19:44 > 0:19:47Maybe you should. I mean, look, you're better than this.

0:19:48 > 0:19:51Do you know, you're right. I am.

0:19:51 > 0:19:52In fact...

0:19:52 > 0:19:55Why on earth am I doing all their washing-up?

0:19:55 > 0:19:59Good question. Look at them. They're no better then you are.

0:19:59 > 0:20:01No! In fact, most of them are worse.

0:20:01 > 0:20:03Well...I don't know about that.

0:20:03 > 0:20:07Of course they are! Claireparker's a complete slob.

0:20:07 > 0:20:10Rex is a massive bore, and Aethelwynne's a meathead.

0:20:10 > 0:20:12Bit harsh, maybe.

0:20:12 > 0:20:15Oh, and as for Bradford, I can't tell a word he says!

0:20:15 > 0:20:17Why doesn't he speak English?

0:20:17 > 0:20:19- He does.- Barely.

0:20:19 > 0:20:21And Kiki's just weird.

0:20:21 > 0:20:22She's always sawing logs.

0:20:24 > 0:20:26Do you know,

0:20:26 > 0:20:31I don't know why I've been taking it from these losers all this time!

0:20:31 > 0:20:32I've had enough!

0:20:34 > 0:20:36Good for you!

0:20:36 > 0:20:38I think.

0:20:39 > 0:20:42Ha-ha-ha!

0:20:42 > 0:20:44How can that even be the same game?

0:20:44 > 0:20:48- You what, mate?- Nothing. Nothing, carry on, mate. Carry on.

0:20:55 > 0:20:58Uh, so, seeing as everyone finds them a bit frightening,

0:20:58 > 0:21:02we were wondering if you might think about taking them off?

0:21:02 > 0:21:06I'm sorry, Claireparker. But I've never felt so powerful!

0:21:07 > 0:21:10Um, OK, look.

0:21:10 > 0:21:11I'll tell you what.

0:21:11 > 0:21:14I'll be more careful from now on, OK?

0:21:19 > 0:21:22Uh... I'm having trouble breathing!

0:21:22 > 0:21:25I know, but it just feels so good, you know?

0:21:25 > 0:21:27I'm going to get some water!

0:21:35 > 0:21:38Oh! Romford, are you OK?

0:21:38 > 0:21:40Uh, yes. Just a bit of loose plating.

0:21:40 > 0:21:43Riley will take care of it when he gets back.

0:21:43 > 0:21:45Oh, no, I can have a go.

0:21:45 > 0:21:47Oh, no, no, no. That's fine, I think I'll...

0:21:47 > 0:21:51Oh! Ah! Oh! Do you know, I'll be fine. Please...

0:21:51 > 0:21:53I've nearly got it! It's all right.

0:21:53 > 0:21:55CRUMPLING METAL

0:21:55 > 0:21:58- Ow!- Rrrgh!

0:22:00 > 0:22:02- Ah.- Romford!

0:22:02 > 0:22:06- Oh.- I'm so sorry!

0:22:06 > 0:22:10I say, my differentials have gone right up into my servo.

0:22:12 > 0:22:15Do you want me to try and expand you back out?

0:22:15 > 0:22:17No! No! Don't touch me!

0:22:17 > 0:22:19I mean, no, I'll be fine.

0:22:31 > 0:22:34When did we decide I'd be the one to catch it?

0:22:34 > 0:22:35- We took a vote.- When?

0:22:35 > 0:22:37When you were out of the room.

0:22:37 > 0:22:40Now concentrate. When he hits, you grab on.

0:22:40 > 0:22:41Oh! Here he comes!

0:22:41 > 0:22:44Waah!

0:22:44 > 0:22:45Did he get him?

0:22:48 > 0:22:51AETHELWYNNE SCREAMS

0:22:51 > 0:22:53Oh, shut up, Aethelwynne, it's fine!

0:22:53 > 0:22:56But it looks a lot faster than it feels.

0:22:56 > 0:22:59That's the weird thing about being on Turbo Boost.

0:22:59 > 0:23:02It looks like normal speed while it's happening to you.

0:23:02 > 0:23:07- Interesting.- But then it looks like everyone else is in slow motion.

0:23:07 > 0:23:08Wow!

0:23:08 > 0:23:11Woo! Hello!

0:23:11 > 0:23:12This is fascinating!

0:23:12 > 0:23:15Go over to Kiki! This will be good.

0:23:17 > 0:23:18Ooh! This is rather good!

0:23:18 > 0:23:20Never mind that!

0:23:20 > 0:23:22You've got to go to the Quartermaster

0:23:22 > 0:23:25and get an elastic deceleration net.

0:23:25 > 0:23:28- It's my only hope! - I was rather enjoying the ride!

0:23:28 > 0:23:29Just get on with it!

0:23:41 > 0:23:44Bradford, you useless piece of metal! Get vacuuming!

0:23:44 > 0:23:47- You! Scrub harder.- Yes, of course.

0:23:47 > 0:23:49And you! Clean faster!

0:23:49 > 0:23:52You, elf. Make me a sandwich!

0:23:52 > 0:23:54Right away, Alexia.

0:23:54 > 0:23:56Claireparker, for goodness' sake!

0:23:56 > 0:24:00Brush your hair and sort yourself out, girl!

0:24:00 > 0:24:03Yes, Alexia. I'm doing it right away, Alexia.

0:24:03 > 0:24:04Less talk, more action!

0:24:04 > 0:24:07Look, Alexia, it's great you being so assertive and everything

0:24:07 > 0:24:09but you might not want to overdo it.

0:24:09 > 0:24:13And what makes you think I'll take advice from you, soldier boy?

0:24:13 > 0:24:16I've got five degrees, you know. I can make up my own mind.

0:24:16 > 0:24:20In fact, why aren't you cleaning like the others?

0:24:20 > 0:24:23What? Think you're better than everyone, do you?

0:24:23 > 0:24:25Sandwich ready, Alexia!

0:24:26 > 0:24:29My work here is done.

0:24:29 > 0:24:32Where are you going, Major Ridley?

0:24:32 > 0:24:35Get back here and clean up this mess!

0:24:35 > 0:24:37Ugh, this sandwich is disgusting!

0:24:37 > 0:24:40And I said no mustard, elf-boy!

0:24:44 > 0:24:47'Welcome back, Sergeant Riley.'

0:24:47 > 0:24:49Alexia!

0:24:49 > 0:24:51- Oh, Riley...- I've missed you!

0:24:51 > 0:24:54Never change! Never change! You're perfect as you are.

0:24:55 > 0:24:58- Um, OK. OK.- Ahem.

0:25:06 > 0:25:08Oh, I'm sick of these!

0:25:10 > 0:25:13Oh, come on. Give me a hand.

0:25:13 > 0:25:17- Aethelwynne!- No way! I saw what you did to Romford!

0:25:17 > 0:25:20Oh, the indignity.

0:25:21 > 0:25:23I think I prefer you this way.

0:25:23 > 0:25:25Do you know what?

0:25:25 > 0:25:26I deserve this.

0:25:26 > 0:25:28I went mad with the power.

0:25:28 > 0:25:32I thought it was a blessing, but it was a curse!

0:25:32 > 0:25:35A terrible curse!

0:25:35 > 0:25:37SHE SOBS

0:25:37 > 0:25:40I can't even offer someone a kind touch,

0:25:40 > 0:25:44a warm hand, a simple pat on the back.

0:25:44 > 0:25:47REX YELLS

0:25:47 > 0:25:51I mean, what use are these?

0:25:51 > 0:25:54SHE WAILS

0:26:01 > 0:26:04OK, Kiki. We throw the net, you grab him.

0:26:04 > 0:26:06Got it.

0:26:06 > 0:26:09So, Other Console Rex is really intelligent?

0:26:09 > 0:26:10Yeah, he's dead smart.

0:26:10 > 0:26:13That must mean the other version of me is a complete genius.

0:26:13 > 0:26:17- Yeah... Well, not exactly. - Ssh! I can hear him coming!

0:26:17 > 0:26:18Get ready, Kiki!

0:26:23 > 0:26:25- Oof!- Ah!

0:26:25 > 0:26:28That was horrible! Thanks, Kiki.

0:26:28 > 0:26:31Aw, you're all right now.

0:26:31 > 0:26:33Rex! You freed me!

0:26:33 > 0:26:36Thank you!

0:26:36 > 0:26:38Ah! Kiki! You're squeezing too hard!

0:26:38 > 0:26:40Really?

0:26:40 > 0:26:41Cool.

0:26:43 > 0:26:45Ah!

0:26:46 > 0:26:48REX BLOWS

0:26:52 > 0:26:55Alexia! Thank goodness you're here.

0:26:55 > 0:26:58I got pinned down online for 18 hours.

0:26:58 > 0:27:00Someone stole my exit port.

0:27:00 > 0:27:03I couldn't get out of there. It was awful.

0:27:03 > 0:27:07Yeah? And what do you want me to do about it?

0:27:07 > 0:27:10Just some water? A glass of water, please.

0:27:10 > 0:27:12Forget it!

0:27:12 > 0:27:15I'm not your servant. Go get it yourself!

0:27:20 > 0:27:21Shoulder rub?

0:27:30 > 0:27:32Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd

0:27:32 > 0:27:35E-mail subtitling@bbc.co.uk

0:27:35 > 0:27:38This is The Console. Please go to the CBBC website

0:27:38 > 0:27:41where the Pixelface games can now be played.