The Two Mrs Hamptons

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0:00:02 > 0:00:05So the big news this morning is that we've got a new pupil joining us.

0:00:05 > 0:00:07Hello, everybody.

0:00:07 > 0:00:09- Mum!- Hello, love.

0:00:09 > 0:00:12If you'd like to take a seat next to Lily, Mrs Hampton?

0:00:12 > 0:00:15My mum's the new girl at school!

0:00:15 > 0:00:19Nooooooooooo!

0:00:19 > 0:00:23Hang on. How can my mum be the new girl at school?

0:00:24 > 0:00:25This is a dream, isn't it?

0:00:25 > 0:00:27Of course it's a dream.

0:00:27 > 0:00:30In real-life Jas wouldn't be a giant badger.

0:00:32 > 0:00:38So if this is a dream, then I should be able to do this.

0:00:38 > 0:00:40STIRRING MUSIC

0:00:45 > 0:00:47Bye, guys!

0:00:50 > 0:00:54Well, if she's gone we can do my dream where I'm a super space pilot

0:00:54 > 0:00:56with jelly hands.

0:00:58 > 0:01:00Take that, pesky aliens.

0:01:00 > 0:01:02ZAPPING

0:01:09 > 0:01:12JAUNTY MUSIC PLAYS

0:01:36 > 0:01:38So awkward!

0:01:38 > 0:01:42Oh, and this is Lily as a baby, dressed as a tomato.

0:01:42 > 0:01:45Mum, do we have to do this now?

0:01:45 > 0:01:48I thought you wanted to sort out the old family photos.

0:01:48 > 0:01:50Not in front of my boyfriend.

0:01:50 > 0:01:53What! Oh, he's loving it, aren't you Rob?

0:01:53 > 0:01:55Yeah. Can I see the tomato one again?

0:01:55 > 0:01:56Oh, Lily gets embarrassed.

0:01:56 > 0:01:59She was like this with her last boyfriend, Matt.

0:01:59 > 0:02:03- Mum!- Don't worry, Rob, Matt was a lovely lad, but you're just as nice.

0:02:03 > 0:02:05And hopefully you won't move away and leave Lily...

0:02:07 > 0:02:09..completely fine.

0:02:09 > 0:02:10And not at all heartbroken.

0:02:10 > 0:02:12And unable to speak.

0:02:13 > 0:02:15For a week.

0:02:15 > 0:02:16Oh.

0:02:16 > 0:02:19I've had these tins in the loft for years.

0:02:19 > 0:02:20Yes, the tins.

0:02:20 > 0:02:21Atchoo!

0:02:21 > 0:02:24- Oh, bless my mittens. - "Bless my mittens"?

0:02:25 > 0:02:28Oh, Lily's first day at school.

0:02:28 > 0:02:30Where does all the time go?

0:02:30 > 0:02:33Seems like only yesterday you were running round with your pants on

0:02:33 > 0:02:36- your head.- Mum!- Oh. My old school reports.

0:02:36 > 0:02:37Oh, wow.

0:02:37 > 0:02:39All A's.

0:02:39 > 0:02:41All A's.

0:02:41 > 0:02:43All Cs and Ds?

0:02:43 > 0:02:45What happened there?

0:02:45 > 0:02:48Ah, that was the year I discovered boys.

0:02:48 > 0:02:50I was top of the class till then.

0:02:50 > 0:02:52Then it all went downhill.

0:02:52 > 0:02:54Well, you can't have everything.

0:02:54 > 0:02:58- Can't you?- Oh, look at my hair in this one.

0:02:58 > 0:03:02- What was I thinking?- Mum! That's my school photo from last month!

0:03:02 > 0:03:04Is it?

0:03:04 > 0:03:07Oh, yes. Er, when I said, "Look at the hair,"

0:03:07 > 0:03:10I meant - it's actually very cool hair.

0:03:15 > 0:03:19My favourite subject is science because it is very interesting.

0:03:19 > 0:03:23Mi asignatura favorita es ciencia porque es muy interesado.

0:03:23 > 0:03:27- Muy interesante.- Yes, of course.

0:03:27 > 0:03:30I've definitely got better since we started doing these sessions.

0:03:30 > 0:03:32I've got so much out of them.

0:03:32 > 0:03:33Me too.

0:03:35 > 0:03:36- Martha?- Mmm?

0:03:36 > 0:03:39Spending time with you, just you and me...

0:03:41 > 0:03:45..I've realised I, well, I wondered if you would...

0:03:46 > 0:03:49..possibly go on a date with me?

0:03:49 > 0:03:52A date with you? Oh, no, I don't want to do that.

0:03:52 > 0:03:53Oh.

0:03:53 > 0:03:57Now when shall we do our next practice? Are you free tomorrow?

0:03:57 > 0:03:59In the circumstances,

0:03:59 > 0:04:01perhaps it would be wise to spend some time apart.

0:04:02 > 0:04:04What, but... How am I going to practise?

0:04:04 > 0:04:06I think I'd find it difficult...

0:04:06 > 0:04:08being together right now.

0:04:13 > 0:04:15Really? But why?

0:04:15 > 0:04:16I've got my pride, Martha.

0:04:16 > 0:04:18I am but flesh and blood.

0:04:18 > 0:04:21If there was someone else who had already stolen your heart, I might

0:04:21 > 0:04:23find it easier to bear but...

0:04:23 > 0:04:24Is there someone else?

0:04:24 > 0:04:26- Er...- There is!

0:04:26 > 0:04:28- Ollie!- Ollie?

0:04:28 > 0:04:31I knew it! Girls always go for the really cool guys.

0:04:31 > 0:04:33Are we still talking about Ollie?

0:04:33 > 0:04:35I should have known. Stupid to ask.

0:04:36 > 0:04:39So what does this mean for our Spanish lessons?

0:04:39 > 0:04:41We can meet tomorrow.

0:04:41 > 0:04:44Knowing you're already going out with Ollie makes it easier to take,

0:04:44 > 0:04:46- somehow.- Ollie, Cranmede Ollie?

0:04:46 > 0:04:50- Ollie Coulton?- Yeah.

0:04:50 > 0:04:51He's a great guy.

0:04:51 > 0:04:54Really, really great guy.

0:04:54 > 0:04:55SNAP!

0:05:02 > 0:05:06- Life lessons is today?- Yes, so far our class is the only one that

0:05:06 > 0:05:08hasn't got a parent coming in.

0:05:08 > 0:05:11- My dad could come in.- Erm...it's a possibility.

0:05:11 > 0:05:14- OK.- Oof.

0:05:14 > 0:05:16Lucky escape there.

0:05:16 > 0:05:19Put some glue on that, would you?

0:05:19 > 0:05:21AIR EXPELS NOISILY

0:05:22 > 0:05:26- That is hilarious. Listen to that. - It's just the air in the bottle.

0:05:26 > 0:05:30I know, but it sounds exactly like...

0:05:30 > 0:05:32Never mind.

0:05:35 > 0:05:36Ah.

0:05:38 > 0:05:40Oh!

0:05:40 > 0:05:44- Who's that?- That is, it's probably the window cleaner,

0:05:44 > 0:05:47just checking out the windows before we start or something.

0:05:47 > 0:05:49Come on.

0:05:50 > 0:05:53And as soon as my mum got a boyfriend, her grades went downhill.

0:05:53 > 0:05:55You don't think that'll happen to me, do you?

0:05:55 > 0:05:57No. You and your mum are very different.

0:05:57 > 0:05:59Yeah, that's what I thought,

0:05:59 > 0:06:03although I have started to like cheese and jam sandwiches.

0:06:03 > 0:06:05- So?- They're my mum's favourite.

0:06:05 > 0:06:09I used to be like, ugh, but now I like them.

0:06:09 > 0:06:11Oh, well, that's just one thing.

0:06:11 > 0:06:13Yeah. Means nothing.

0:06:13 > 0:06:14Hey, friends.

0:06:14 > 0:06:17I think I've discovered why they call this a break room.

0:06:17 > 0:06:19This just broke.

0:06:19 > 0:06:23Just when I thought this place couldn't get any messier.

0:06:23 > 0:06:24Tell me about it.

0:06:24 > 0:06:29I spent ages on this equation and it turns out X squared is a squashed

0:06:29 > 0:06:32- raisin.- Raisin!

0:06:35 > 0:06:37Atchoo.

0:06:37 > 0:06:40- Bless my mittens.- Bless my mittens?

0:06:40 > 0:06:43Oh. Lily always says that when she sneezes.

0:06:43 > 0:06:45Do I?

0:06:45 > 0:06:48- Yeah, it's your thing.- But that's what my mum says.

0:06:55 > 0:06:58That's the last coconut water, I was going to get that.

0:06:58 > 0:07:00Sorry, Rufus, I've got double physics.

0:07:00 > 0:07:02And I need the amino acids for optimal brain function.

0:07:02 > 0:07:05Fine. You take it.

0:07:05 > 0:07:07Take everything from me, why don't you!

0:07:09 > 0:07:11Cheese and jam sandwiches.

0:07:11 > 0:07:12Bless my mittens.

0:07:12 > 0:07:15And my mum looked exactly like me when she was young.

0:07:15 > 0:07:16Jas, it's true.

0:07:16 > 0:07:18I'm turning into my mum.

0:07:18 > 0:07:20Two Mrs Hamptons?

0:07:20 > 0:07:21Mrs Hampton in stereo.

0:07:21 > 0:07:24- Cool.- Have you seen Ollie? - Why, what's up?

0:07:24 > 0:07:26Rufus wanted to go on a date with me.

0:07:26 > 0:07:29So to be nice, I let him think I was already going out with Ollie.

0:07:29 > 0:07:32Why not just go on a date with Rufus? He's great.

0:07:32 > 0:07:33I don't want to go out with anyone.

0:07:33 > 0:07:37Going out with boys is a surefire way to lower exam marks.

0:07:37 > 0:07:40- Is it?- And if I ever WAS to go out with someone,

0:07:40 > 0:07:42they'd have to be my intellectual equal.

0:07:42 > 0:07:44Aha, like Ollie.

0:07:44 > 0:07:45Yeah, like Ollie.

0:07:45 > 0:07:47Er, no, not Ollie.

0:07:47 > 0:07:50Obviously not Ollie. No. Never Ollie.

0:07:50 > 0:07:53- Hi, Ollie.- Does anyone know what's up with Rufus?

0:07:53 > 0:07:57Ollie, er, I need you to do me a small favour.

0:07:57 > 0:07:59Yeah, sure. What's up.

0:07:59 > 0:08:00Pretend to go out with me,

0:08:00 > 0:08:02so that Rufus won't be too upset that I won't go out with him.

0:08:02 > 0:08:04Wait, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What?

0:08:04 > 0:08:08It's the only way he'll be able to keep giving me Spanish lessons.

0:08:08 > 0:08:10I only got 94% on the last test.

0:08:10 > 0:08:14But what would this "pretending to go out" consist of?

0:08:14 > 0:08:15Nothing. Hardly anything.

0:08:15 > 0:08:17It won't impact your life.

0:08:17 > 0:08:18In any way.

0:08:22 > 0:08:25- Hi, Martha.- Hi, Rufus.

0:08:25 > 0:08:28I'm free afternoon break if you want to meet in the library.

0:08:28 > 0:08:30Oh, yeah, that'd be great.

0:08:30 > 0:08:32We're not doing anything then, are we, Olliekins?

0:08:32 > 0:08:34No.

0:08:38 > 0:08:40There has to be some alternative to this.

0:08:40 > 0:08:43That doesn't involve violating my personal space.

0:08:43 > 0:08:46Hey, why can't you just invent a fictional boyfriend that goes to a

0:08:46 > 0:08:50- different school.- You know, I've never said these words before,

0:08:50 > 0:08:51that's a good plan, Jas.

0:08:51 > 0:08:55Yeah. And to make it more real we can dress up an old shop dummy.

0:08:55 > 0:08:58You can go to the cinema with it and I'll take pictures.

0:08:58 > 0:09:02- And we're back.- Look, it's only until tomorrow.

0:09:02 > 0:09:04No-one will even notice.

0:09:04 > 0:09:08Oh, Ollie and Martha, sitting in a tree!

0:09:08 > 0:09:10Eh? Eh?

0:09:10 > 0:09:11Yeah. I think they're going out.

0:09:11 > 0:09:13You're no fun any more.

0:09:13 > 0:09:15Oh, no.

0:09:15 > 0:09:16Carry on.

0:09:21 > 0:09:22Have you seen Mr Malone?

0:09:22 > 0:09:25He was just here, but, er...

0:09:25 > 0:09:27I just wanted to tell him I could come in this afternoon, you see.

0:09:27 > 0:09:28Oh, right, yeah.

0:09:28 > 0:09:31I'll tell him. Though I'm sure it's fine.

0:09:31 > 0:09:33He did tell me he was expecting you.

0:09:33 > 0:09:35The only thing is, what he wants me to do.

0:09:35 > 0:09:37Just clean the windows, I think.

0:09:37 > 0:09:41Window cleaning. Very important skill.

0:09:41 > 0:09:43And I always want to help the school as much as I c...

0:09:45 > 0:09:47..can.

0:09:58 > 0:10:00Do we still have to hold hands?

0:10:00 > 0:10:03Yes, Rufus could walk past at any minute.

0:10:04 > 0:10:06This is ridiculous.

0:10:06 > 0:10:09How am I supposed to choose between Rob and cleverness?

0:10:09 > 0:10:11I have the same problem with ice cream.

0:10:11 > 0:10:13Cookie dough or mint choc chip?

0:10:13 > 0:10:14It's impossible.

0:10:29 > 0:10:32There must be a way of going out with Rob and staying clever.

0:10:35 > 0:10:37Oh, I'll put my thinking cap on.

0:10:37 > 0:10:38Yeah, me too.

0:10:42 > 0:10:46Oh, you actually have one of those.

0:10:51 > 0:10:53Martha, this is intolerable.

0:10:55 > 0:10:58What do you mean? People hold hands all the time.

0:10:58 > 0:11:02I don't. You know human contact makes me come out in a panic rash.

0:11:02 > 0:11:03Have you got a rash now?

0:11:05 > 0:11:08No. That's weird.

0:11:08 > 0:11:10I suppose I can hold hands with...

0:11:10 > 0:11:12some people.

0:11:16 > 0:11:18I think it's run out of batteries.

0:11:20 > 0:11:24Oh! I know, I just have to keep exercising my brain all the time

0:11:24 > 0:11:28- I'm with Rob, to keep it in good condition.- OK, not bad.

0:11:28 > 0:11:30Hey, Lily. You all right?

0:11:30 > 0:11:32Oh, Rob, yes.

0:11:32 > 0:11:34I'm all right. I'm fine.

0:11:34 > 0:11:36Splendid. Healthy.

0:11:36 > 0:11:38Robust. Flourishing.

0:11:38 > 0:11:40- Vigorous.- Cool.

0:11:40 > 0:11:42- Want to hang?- I would be delighted.

0:11:42 > 0:11:45Gladdened. And entranced.

0:11:45 > 0:11:46- To hang.- Great.

0:11:46 > 0:11:48Seven eights are 56.

0:11:48 > 0:11:49Right.

0:11:58 > 0:12:00Don't tell me, a girl, right?

0:12:01 > 0:12:03Recognised the look, huh?

0:12:03 > 0:12:05See it every time I look in the mirror.

0:12:11 > 0:12:13Does she know?

0:12:13 > 0:12:15Yeah. But she's taken.

0:12:15 > 0:12:18Sounds familiar. Mine too.

0:12:18 > 0:12:19Must be pretty special.

0:12:19 > 0:12:23Yes, she is. What a brain.

0:12:23 > 0:12:25Smart, huh?

0:12:25 > 0:12:26Mine's the smartest girl in the school.

0:12:28 > 0:12:31Goes by the name of Martha.

0:12:31 > 0:12:33Martha? But...

0:12:33 > 0:12:35that's the girl that I...

0:12:35 > 0:12:36- BOTH:- Oh, man.

0:12:42 > 0:12:45Look, there's the guy she's going out with.

0:12:45 > 0:12:48- Ollie Coulton.- The coolest guy in school.

0:12:50 > 0:12:51Doesn't he know it, though.

0:12:51 > 0:12:55Swaggering around school like he owns the place.

0:12:58 > 0:13:00How can one guy have it all?

0:13:00 > 0:13:03I know. The hair, the face, the baby blues.

0:13:03 > 0:13:06And everything he does just oozes cool.

0:13:08 > 0:13:12If there was any justice, someone would bring him down a peg or two.

0:13:12 > 0:13:14Yeah.

0:13:14 > 0:13:16Perhaps someone should.

0:13:20 > 0:13:24So on Saturday I'll meet you at the clock tower at 12 and then we'll get

0:13:24 > 0:13:25- the bus into town.- Yeah.

0:13:25 > 0:13:27And here's a brain teaser on that.

0:13:27 > 0:13:31If the bus leaves at 1215 and goes at 30 miles per hour for 20 miles,

0:13:31 > 0:13:33what time would we arrive?

0:13:33 > 0:13:34Um, not sure, but when we do arrive,

0:13:34 > 0:13:37we could have a look around the Sports Warehouse.

0:13:37 > 0:13:40No, no, we'll start by a visit to the science fair,

0:13:40 > 0:13:42we'll go to the big library in town,

0:13:42 > 0:13:45then we'll pop by the zoo on the way back, memorise five new facts about

0:13:45 > 0:13:47animals and spend the journey home doing crosswords.

0:13:47 > 0:13:50- What about trainer shopping? - No time!

0:13:50 > 0:13:52We'll make it a big day of learning,

0:13:52 > 0:13:54so we can keep our brains super-active.

0:13:54 > 0:13:57Oh! Great.

0:13:57 > 0:14:01Ollie, surely your mum or dad could talk to the class this afternoon?

0:14:01 > 0:14:02Both working, sorry.

0:14:02 > 0:14:04But this is life lessons!

0:14:04 > 0:14:06It's important.

0:14:06 > 0:14:07My dad is free.

0:14:07 > 0:14:10No, no, your dad's done far too much damage.

0:14:10 > 0:14:12I mean, far too much for the school.

0:14:12 > 0:14:15I don't want to trouble him again.

0:14:15 > 0:14:18- Don't worry.- Oh, Martha's in the library.

0:14:18 > 0:14:19You might have to hold hands again.

0:14:19 > 0:14:22Oh, that's OK.

0:14:22 > 0:14:23Apparently I can do that now.

0:14:23 > 0:14:25With some people.

0:14:25 > 0:14:27Oh. OK.

0:14:35 > 0:14:38Hi, Sir. Oh, the window cleaner's coming in this afternoon.

0:14:38 > 0:14:41Why do I care about when the window cleaner's coming?

0:14:41 > 0:14:42Just passing on a message.

0:14:42 > 0:14:44Window cleaners.

0:14:44 > 0:14:46As if I haven't got enough to worry about.

0:14:46 > 0:14:48What music do you like?

0:14:48 > 0:14:52- Que musica te gusta. - Me gusta la musica classica.

0:14:52 > 0:14:54Absolutely perfect, Martha.

0:14:54 > 0:14:56You're going to sail through this.

0:14:56 > 0:14:58- Hello, Rufus.- Hello, Ollie.

0:15:00 > 0:15:01Well, I'd better be going.

0:15:06 > 0:15:09- Hold hands?- But Rufus has a flute lesson now.

0:15:09 > 0:15:10He's not going to see us, is he?

0:15:11 > 0:15:14Well, he might get sent back to the library for a music book,

0:15:14 > 0:15:17so it's just better to be safe than sorry.

0:15:17 > 0:15:18True. OK.

0:15:20 > 0:15:23Thanks, Ollie. I know how much you hate doing this.

0:15:23 > 0:15:25Oh, I guess I'll just have to cope.

0:15:25 > 0:15:27Hmm!

0:15:27 > 0:15:29- What.- Oh, nothing.

0:15:30 > 0:15:32Hi, guys, hola, bonjour, ciao.

0:15:32 > 0:15:34Konichiwa.

0:15:34 > 0:15:36Brain still working, then?

0:15:36 > 0:15:38So far. I'm seeing Rob on Saturday,

0:15:38 > 0:15:40but instead of going trainer shopping,

0:15:40 > 0:15:42we're doing a whole day of learning.

0:15:42 > 0:15:44So that way I can still be with him

0:15:44 > 0:15:46but not lose my cleverness like my mum did.

0:15:46 > 0:15:49So you're going to spend time doing all the things you want

0:15:49 > 0:15:51to do and none of the things he wants to do.

0:15:51 > 0:15:52Yeah.

0:15:54 > 0:15:55Oh.

0:15:55 > 0:15:57That's a teeny bit selfish, isn't it?

0:16:00 > 0:16:04Hang on. What if you're barking up the wrong tree?

0:16:04 > 0:16:06You know, like a dog who thinks there's a bone at the top of one

0:16:06 > 0:16:09tree but in fact it's in a totally different tree.

0:16:09 > 0:16:11Yes, we're aware of the phrase.

0:16:11 > 0:16:13Your mum lost her cleverness in

0:16:13 > 0:16:15the same year she discovered boys, right?

0:16:15 > 0:16:17But what if boys aren't the problem?

0:16:17 > 0:16:19It's the actual growing up itself.

0:16:19 > 0:16:22You mean being Rob's girlfriend is OK and the only thing I have to do

0:16:22 > 0:16:24to stay clever is stop growing up?

0:16:25 > 0:16:27Yes, I like this theory.

0:16:27 > 0:16:29But you can't stop growing up.

0:16:29 > 0:16:32I can try. I can, I can...

0:16:32 > 0:16:34You can only eat baby food and rusks.

0:16:34 > 0:16:38- You are what you eat, right?- I can hang around younger people.

0:16:38 > 0:16:40Their influence might slow down my rate of growth.

0:16:40 > 0:16:42Delay me turning into my mum.

0:16:42 > 0:16:44And thus keep you clever.

0:16:44 > 0:16:45Bingo!

0:16:46 > 0:16:50Hey, guys. What are you two young scamps up to then, eh?

0:16:50 > 0:16:53Shh, Maxwell's asleep.

0:16:53 > 0:16:56I'm not asleep, I'm just resting my eyes.

0:16:56 > 0:16:59Oh! Well I just thought I'd spend some time with the new Cranmede

0:16:59 > 0:17:03generation, find out what's epic, what's making you lol.

0:17:03 > 0:17:05What is she saying?

0:17:05 > 0:17:08I don't know, she's mumbling again.

0:17:08 > 0:17:09No-one speaks clearly any more.

0:17:09 > 0:17:11How about a game of It. It!

0:17:18 > 0:17:20- Aren't you going to chase me?- With my knee?

0:17:20 > 0:17:22It's his knee. He gets a twinge.

0:17:22 > 0:17:25Not been the same since cross-country last week.

0:17:25 > 0:17:27Oh! Let's just chat.

0:17:27 > 0:17:29What's on your mind, guys?

0:17:29 > 0:17:33I was just thinking about how the Year Sevens were less boisterous in

0:17:33 > 0:17:35my day. They're out of control now.

0:17:37 > 0:17:40So much for slowing down my growing up,

0:17:40 > 0:17:44I was only with them five minutes and I feel like I've aged 20 years.

0:17:44 > 0:17:46Well, if you want to stop growing up, just copy me.

0:17:46 > 0:17:48I still sleep with my favourite pencil,

0:17:48 > 0:17:51I still eat my food in alphabetical order.

0:17:51 > 0:17:53These aren't kid things, they are Jas things.

0:17:53 > 0:17:57Come on. Who do we know who's managed to stay young?

0:17:57 > 0:17:59Someone who's just a big kid?

0:18:00 > 0:18:03HEAVY METAL MUSIC PLAYS

0:18:10 > 0:18:11SHE KNOCKS

0:18:13 > 0:18:17- Come in.- Hi, Sir. I'm not interrupting, am I?

0:18:17 > 0:18:19No, no, I was just doing some marking.

0:18:19 > 0:18:21I need some advice.

0:18:21 > 0:18:23You've come to the right place. Shoot.

0:18:23 > 0:18:25Well, even though you're a grown-up,

0:18:25 > 0:18:27you've always seemed so young.

0:18:27 > 0:18:28I'm glad you've noticed.

0:18:28 > 0:18:31And I just really wanted to know what your secret was.

0:18:31 > 0:18:33I can sum it up in three words.

0:18:33 > 0:18:35Moisturise, moisturise, moisturise.

0:18:35 > 0:18:38- It is the...- I don't really mean physically young.

0:18:38 > 0:18:41I meant more...mentally young.

0:18:41 > 0:18:43- Mentally young?- Yeah.

0:18:43 > 0:18:46You know, a bit childlike, a bit silly.

0:18:46 > 0:18:48Are you saying I'm immature?

0:18:48 > 0:18:50Yeah! No.

0:18:50 > 0:18:53I think you'll find most people think I'm very mature.

0:18:53 > 0:18:56- I'm very grown-up.- Really? Well, what about the time you...

0:18:56 > 0:18:57La, la, la, la, la, la...

0:18:57 > 0:18:59I'm not listening. I am not listening.

0:18:59 > 0:19:02La, la-la-la-la...

0:19:02 > 0:19:04La-la-la.

0:19:04 > 0:19:06Thank you.

0:19:06 > 0:19:09HE WHISTLES HAPPILY

0:19:11 > 0:19:12Oh!

0:19:16 > 0:19:17Whoa!

0:19:20 > 0:19:23Oh, don't mind me, I'm just here to clean the windows.

0:19:26 > 0:19:28That's weird.

0:19:28 > 0:19:29I thought I'd filled that up.

0:19:34 > 0:19:36D'oh! Rufus, hello.

0:19:36 > 0:19:39Don't try that famous charm on me, Ollie.

0:19:39 > 0:19:42- It won't work.- Yeah.

0:19:42 > 0:19:44- Alfie?- How's Martha?

0:19:44 > 0:19:46Um, she's all right, I think.

0:19:46 > 0:19:50You think? If she was my girlfriend I'd make sure she was the happiest

0:19:50 > 0:19:53- girl in the world.- I'd treat her like a princess.

0:19:53 > 0:19:56Martha's never liked princesses. Thinks they're a bit wet.

0:19:56 > 0:19:58The trouble with cool guys like you, Ollie,

0:19:58 > 0:20:00is that just because you could get any girl you want,

0:20:00 > 0:20:01you take them for granted.

0:20:01 > 0:20:03Where are the chocolates?

0:20:03 > 0:20:04Where are the flowers?

0:20:04 > 0:20:08If you can't treat Martha in the way she deserves to be treated,

0:20:08 > 0:20:09maybe you should find someone else.

0:20:09 > 0:20:12- Yeah.- Listen, I don't care what you two think.

0:20:12 > 0:20:15Martha and I have a special connection, actually.

0:20:15 > 0:20:17Yeah. She's the perfect girlfriend for me and

0:20:17 > 0:20:19I'm the perfect boyfriend for her.

0:20:19 > 0:20:21Fine.

0:20:21 > 0:20:22Just don't break her heart.

0:20:26 > 0:20:27Too weird, it's too weird.

0:20:30 > 0:20:32Er, a little help?

0:20:33 > 0:20:35There's nothing I can do, is there?

0:20:35 > 0:20:37I'm destined to grow up, turn into my mum,

0:20:37 > 0:20:39and wave goodbye to all my lovely A grades.

0:20:39 > 0:20:43So you might think, but luckily I've come up with a Jastastic plan.

0:20:43 > 0:20:46- You have?- Yes, sirree.

0:20:46 > 0:20:49A way of reversing your growth and keeping you clever by getting you

0:20:49 > 0:20:51back in touch with your childhood.

0:20:51 > 0:20:56Right. As you know, it is time for our very first life lesson.

0:20:56 > 0:21:00And thanks to Jas, at the very last minute, we have managed

0:21:00 > 0:21:02to find a parent to talk to us.

0:21:02 > 0:21:05So please welcome Mrs Hampton.

0:21:08 > 0:21:09Hello, everybody.

0:21:09 > 0:21:11Hello, love.

0:21:11 > 0:21:13This is a dream, this IS a dream.

0:21:13 > 0:21:15- You're welcome.- Now,

0:21:15 > 0:21:19I'm wearing my old school uniform today because I want to talk to you

0:21:19 > 0:21:21about why you shouldn't try to grow up so quickly.

0:21:23 > 0:21:26There's so much pressure on young people to grow up, these days.

0:21:26 > 0:21:29But you shouldn't forget the things that you used to love as a child.

0:21:29 > 0:21:31Like what made you laugh.

0:21:31 > 0:21:34With my Lily it was always my chicken impressions.

0:21:34 > 0:21:37SHE CLUCKS

0:21:37 > 0:21:40Brilliant.

0:21:41 > 0:21:45And she was never happier than when she was running around with her

0:21:45 > 0:21:47pants on her head. First picture.

0:21:47 > 0:21:50LAUGHTER

0:21:50 > 0:21:53Oh, lovely memories.

0:21:53 > 0:21:57And she used to love next door's cat so much that she wanted to marry it.

0:21:57 > 0:22:00So we organised a little wedding.

0:22:00 > 0:22:02- Next picture.- ALL:- Aw!

0:22:02 > 0:22:06Getting in touch with your childhood, yeah?

0:22:06 > 0:22:08Yes, and it's horrible.

0:22:08 > 0:22:10And because she loved the clowns in the circus,

0:22:10 > 0:22:12we used to have custard pie fights around the house.

0:22:13 > 0:22:15We did it, like, once.

0:22:15 > 0:22:18She was like - "Pie me in the face, pie me in the face!"

0:22:18 > 0:22:20I was, like, five years old.

0:22:20 > 0:22:23Well, it was fun then,

0:22:23 > 0:22:25it's bound to be fun now.

0:22:27 > 0:22:35SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC

0:22:42 > 0:22:44Do me, do me.

0:22:44 > 0:22:47Yeah, pie me in the face!

0:22:47 > 0:22:49Pie me in the face!

0:22:49 > 0:22:50CLATTERING

0:22:52 > 0:22:54Dad?

0:22:54 > 0:22:56Hey, kids.

0:22:56 > 0:22:58This...

0:22:58 > 0:23:01is how we clean the windows.

0:23:01 > 0:23:03OH...

0:23:03 > 0:23:05CLATTERING

0:23:09 > 0:23:11I'm all right, I'm all right.

0:23:13 > 0:23:14Let me just try that again.

0:23:23 > 0:23:25That might have been the most embarrassing thing that has ever

0:23:25 > 0:23:29happened to me, but at least it's stopped me from wanting to stay

0:23:29 > 0:23:31- young.- Which was obviously my plan.

0:23:31 > 0:23:33OK, ready?

0:23:33 > 0:23:35Lily's message to her future self, take one.

0:23:35 > 0:23:39Hello, Lily, this is Lily from the past.

0:23:39 > 0:23:42You're all grown-up now, living in your own house,

0:23:42 > 0:23:43and married to Rob Edwards.

0:23:43 > 0:23:45Hi, future Rob.

0:23:45 > 0:23:47But I'm here with a serious message.

0:23:47 > 0:23:49Right now, I'm clever.

0:23:49 > 0:23:52I won the Debating Society medal.

0:23:52 > 0:23:56And I got an A+ plus on my last English essay.

0:23:56 > 0:24:00But, future Lily, you're getting older and maybe you've started

0:24:00 > 0:24:04to lose brain power, so here's my warning. Hang on to your cleverness.

0:24:04 > 0:24:08You can be that globetrotting TV reporter or celebrity vet.

0:24:08 > 0:24:10Just go out there and get it.

0:24:10 > 0:24:14Oh! And when you sneeze, don't say bless my mittens.

0:24:14 > 0:24:15It's really weird.

0:24:15 > 0:24:17And cut.

0:24:17 > 0:24:20Let's try it with a bit more desperation.

0:24:20 > 0:24:23I mean, this is the future of your brain we're talking about.

0:24:23 > 0:24:26Good news, girls, I found another tin of old photos.

0:24:26 > 0:24:29- Oh, great.- Sorry, Mum, but we're doing something important.

0:24:34 > 0:24:36- Who's that?- Oh, that's my mum.

0:24:36 > 0:24:38Lily's granny.

0:24:38 > 0:24:42There she is getting a Royal Society award for scientific achievement.

0:24:42 > 0:24:45Sorry, what?

0:24:45 > 0:24:47Yeah. Very clever woman, your granny.

0:24:47 > 0:24:49Well-respected scientist.

0:24:49 > 0:24:52And I'm hearing this for the first time now?

0:24:52 > 0:24:54Well, she's very modest, your gran.

0:24:54 > 0:24:57Hates me banging on about her achievements.

0:24:57 > 0:25:00I always thought you take after her, Lily.

0:25:04 > 0:25:07Ah, Rufus.

0:25:07 > 0:25:09Just the chap. This is Margarita.

0:25:09 > 0:25:11Her family have just moved over here from Spain,

0:25:11 > 0:25:14I wondered if you could show her around.

0:25:14 > 0:25:17Rufus is our Spanish language whiz,

0:25:17 > 0:25:20so if anyone can make you feel at home, it's him.

0:25:21 > 0:25:22Hi.

0:25:22 > 0:25:26Oh. Hello, or should I say, "Hola"?

0:25:35 > 0:25:37- How did the test go?- Great.

0:25:37 > 0:25:39Those lessons with Rufus really paid off.

0:25:39 > 0:25:41And you'll be relieved to know

0:25:41 > 0:25:43we don't have to pretend to go out any more.

0:25:43 > 0:25:45Oh!

0:25:45 > 0:25:48Good. It was starting to make me feel a bit strange.

0:25:49 > 0:25:51What will you tell Rufus?

0:25:51 > 0:25:52I'll just tell him I dumped you.

0:25:52 > 0:25:54Why don't you tell him I dumped you?

0:25:54 > 0:25:56I want to make it seem more believable.

0:25:56 > 0:25:58I think me dumping you is just as believable.

0:25:58 > 0:26:00- I disagree.- Well, I beg to differ.

0:26:00 > 0:26:02Look, I'm meeting Rufus in a minute.

0:26:02 > 0:26:05He's bound to be upset that I still don't want to go out with him,

0:26:05 > 0:26:07so give us some privacy.

0:26:07 > 0:26:08All right, all right.

0:26:10 > 0:26:13SPANISH MUSIC

0:26:36 > 0:26:38- Rufus?- Oh, hi, Martha.

0:26:38 > 0:26:41Can't stop. I'm on my way to lunchtime dancing club.

0:26:41 > 0:26:45MUSIC CONTINUES

0:26:58 > 0:27:01So, you know I've always wanted to improve my electronics?

0:27:01 > 0:27:04- Yes.- Well, the funny thing is,

0:27:04 > 0:27:06Alfie's an expert and he's offered to give me some lessons.

0:27:06 > 0:27:08- Oh, no.- Martha.

0:27:08 > 0:27:10For you.

0:27:12 > 0:27:13Hmm.

0:27:14 > 0:27:17So, you know I said we could stop pretending to go out?

0:27:17 > 0:27:21Well, I suppose it wouldn't hurt to hold hands for a few more days.

0:27:21 > 0:27:23Um, when Alfie's around.

0:27:25 > 0:27:26Guys, did you hear?

0:27:26 > 0:27:29Turns out my granny is, like, an award-winning scientist.

0:27:29 > 0:27:31And I take after her, not my mum.

0:27:31 > 0:27:32That's perfectly normal.

0:27:32 > 0:27:35Yeah, some characteristics seem to skip a generation.

0:27:35 > 0:27:40The thing is, I do love my mum, but one Mrs Hampton is quite enough.

0:27:40 > 0:27:42Hey, guys.

0:27:42 > 0:27:46Lily, you're right. Cheese and jam sandwiches are lush.

0:27:46 > 0:27:48- What?- Oh, nice flowers.

0:27:50 > 0:27:51Atchoo!

0:27:51 > 0:27:53Oh, bless my mittens.

0:27:53 > 0:27:55Noooooo!