99 Cool Things to Do with a Time Machine

Download Subtitles

Transcript

0:00:02 > 0:00:06# Creepy ain't the word, freaky ain't the word, sneaky ain't the word

0:00:06 > 0:00:07# See what I've observed

0:00:07 > 0:00:10# As there's no easy way to describe this geeky place

0:00:10 > 0:00:13# Even geeky place doesn't tell you what I need to say

0:00:13 > 0:00:15# This is Strange Hill, where a talking frog can eat your face

0:00:15 > 0:00:18# It's very, very random, you'll get used to these debates

0:00:18 > 0:00:20# If you stick around, although I wouldn't recommend it

0:00:20 > 0:00:23# When they used the name "Strange" mate, they really meant it

0:00:23 > 0:00:25# There's some things in life in which you just don't mess

0:00:25 > 0:00:28# On every vest I got the letters SOS

0:00:28 > 0:00:31# Cos you never know what might be lurking round the corner

0:00:31 > 0:00:33# Or what it might do if they ever found or saw you

0:00:33 > 0:00:36# Keep the lights on in the hallways, all day

0:00:36 > 0:00:38# Things won't always tend to go your way

0:00:38 > 0:00:41# Watch your back and be prepared

0:00:41 > 0:00:42# Can't wait for 3:30

0:00:42 > 0:00:43# See you there. #

0:00:43 > 0:00:44BELL RINGS

0:00:49 > 0:00:51We've got to get to school fast!

0:00:51 > 0:00:55I don't agree with any of that statement. What's the big rush?

0:00:55 > 0:00:57You do not want to be late to Strange Hill.

0:00:57 > 0:01:02The last student to be late was Matthews. He got put on litter duty!

0:01:02 > 0:01:04Hello, friends!

0:01:04 > 0:01:06The headmaster and school secretary delight in handing out

0:01:06 > 0:01:10punishments for lateness, particularly Miss Grimshaw.

0:01:10 > 0:01:12Huh...Grimshaw.

0:01:12 > 0:01:16Look at the clock! We'll never get to class on time and the moment

0:01:16 > 0:01:18it strikes the hour, we're late, then we'll be punished

0:01:18 > 0:01:21and it will go on our records and we'll never get into university

0:01:21 > 0:01:24and we'll end up being teachers who delight in marking kids late...

0:01:24 > 0:01:29Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey, you're in a Beckyloop! There you go.

0:01:29 > 0:01:34There's only one thing we can do - make sure that clock doesn't strike.

0:01:36 > 0:01:37Hup! Mmm!

0:01:40 > 0:01:41Mph!

0:01:43 > 0:01:47Or, I could just be late for class. Meh, climbing's fun.

0:01:47 > 0:01:48Huh! Mmmh!

0:01:51 > 0:01:52Ugh!

0:01:54 > 0:01:55Waaaaaaah!

0:01:59 > 0:02:00Hnnnh!

0:02:05 > 0:02:08This is very dramatic. I wish I'd brought popcorn.

0:02:08 > 0:02:10Here. I popped it myself.

0:02:14 > 0:02:16Gah! Nnnnh!

0:02:16 > 0:02:17BELL RINGS

0:02:17 > 0:02:20'It's Monday morning, 9am.

0:02:20 > 0:02:25'All pupils should be in class in three, two, one...'

0:02:31 > 0:02:35What. Was. That?

0:02:35 > 0:02:38I'm fine, by the way.

0:02:38 > 0:02:42OK. Mr B, I know it LOOKS like we're late and rather sweaty,

0:02:42 > 0:02:45but if you look at the school clock...

0:02:45 > 0:02:50it has not yet struck the hour, so we cannot in actual fact be late.

0:02:50 > 0:02:52Nor are we panicked!

0:02:52 > 0:02:57Of course you're not late. In fact, you're rather early.

0:02:57 > 0:02:59I don't sleep in my classroom.

0:03:04 > 0:03:08So we just witnessed something really odd.

0:03:08 > 0:03:10Yeah, Mr B in his nightshirt.

0:03:10 > 0:03:13No, no, I mean that we seem to have gone back in time

0:03:13 > 0:03:17and the clock tower may be some sort of time machine.

0:03:17 > 0:03:20Look. My popcorn's unpopped itself.

0:03:20 > 0:03:24And everything here looks like it was before the bell rang.

0:03:24 > 0:03:27Yet we all heard the bell ring, remember?

0:03:27 > 0:03:30You're right. This is SO five minutes ago!

0:03:30 > 0:03:34And she fell right on her big fat bottom!

0:03:34 > 0:03:35That's so funny!

0:03:35 > 0:03:37That's so sad!

0:03:37 > 0:03:40Yo, check out my flash new medallion!

0:03:40 > 0:03:44Do you even know who Malcolm X was?

0:03:44 > 0:03:47Course I do! He was one of the X Men! Innit!

0:03:47 > 0:03:51Bonjour. Je m'appelle un pomme de terre.

0:03:51 > 0:03:55Look, they're posting the exam schedule right now!

0:03:55 > 0:03:58This very moment, our fate is sealed.

0:03:58 > 0:04:03Oh! It's Exam Week. I knew it was some week I had to prepare for.

0:04:03 > 0:04:06Mitchell, they take exams very seriously here!

0:04:06 > 0:04:08More seriously than anything,

0:04:08 > 0:04:12even students getting attacked by the wolves on the school moors!

0:04:12 > 0:04:14WOLF HOWLS

0:04:14 > 0:04:16Now Abercrombie's placing the exam answers in the safe.

0:04:16 > 0:04:18This is all EVER so serious.

0:04:23 > 0:04:26Ha ha ha!

0:04:26 > 0:04:31I guess I could prepare a bit. But not enough that it looks like I care.

0:04:31 > 0:04:34Well, we're going to help you study, aren't we, Templeton?

0:04:34 > 0:04:37We're going to DO something? Excellent!

0:04:39 > 0:04:44Monday - no exams. Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, nothing,

0:04:44 > 0:04:46then on Friday - NO WAY!

0:04:46 > 0:04:51English, Biology, Chemistry, History, History of Chemistry...

0:04:51 > 0:04:55RE, CDT, IT, Ancient Greek, Algebra, Algebra en Francais

0:04:55 > 0:05:00and lunch - all of our exams, every single one - ON ONE DAY!

0:05:00 > 0:05:05Would you mind terribly if I went berserk?

0:05:05 > 0:05:08Ahhh, haaahhhh, ahhhhh!

0:05:08 > 0:05:13Mitchell, you're good at not caring. Can you teach me not to care?

0:05:13 > 0:05:15Sorry, Becks. It's a talent you're born with.

0:05:15 > 0:05:17Also, I don't care enough to pass it on.

0:05:17 > 0:05:20Ahhhh, haahhhh, ahhhhh!

0:05:20 > 0:05:21Ahhhhhh!

0:05:25 > 0:05:26Ahhhhh!

0:05:30 > 0:05:35And that, pupils of Strange Hill, is what will happen to cheaters!

0:05:35 > 0:05:38Who you calling a cheater, cheater?

0:05:38 > 0:05:42- You think you can steal the answers to the exams?- No.- Exactly!

0:05:42 > 0:05:46- He's not listening to a word I'm saying.- Behold!

0:05:46 > 0:05:49The most advanced security system available -

0:05:49 > 0:05:52to a lesser-ranked, publicly funded school -

0:05:52 > 0:05:57children, I give you... the Electric Sphinx!

0:05:57 > 0:06:01It's got blinking lights and a clock that's counting down!

0:06:01 > 0:06:03- Impressed?- No.

0:06:03 > 0:06:06And a time-lock.

0:06:06 > 0:06:09The safe will not open

0:06:09 > 0:06:12until midnight after the last exams are over.

0:06:12 > 0:06:16So don't even think of trying to peek at the answers, Mitchell.

0:06:16 > 0:06:21- OK, Melvyn.- Silence, potential cheater thiever deceiver!

0:06:21 > 0:06:23I'm doing you a favour by merely

0:06:23 > 0:06:29placing you three on litter duty for the rest of the term!

0:06:29 > 0:06:33Oh, yeah, who's the man! I've still got it!

0:06:34 > 0:06:37I can't be on litter duty! I'll smell like eggs!

0:06:37 > 0:06:41- What are we going to do?- Well, we're not going to stand here like idiots,

0:06:41 > 0:06:45- scratching our behinds and moaning....- Ahh, that's got it!

0:06:45 > 0:06:47Anyway, it's time for action!

0:06:47 > 0:06:49We're going to go back in time and make this never happen!

0:06:49 > 0:06:51And then study. Right?

0:06:51 > 0:06:54Memo to Spiderman: climbing up the inside of a structure's

0:06:54 > 0:06:57a lot easier than climbing up the outside.

0:06:57 > 0:07:00Memo to Aquaman: caution. There's no water here.

0:07:00 > 0:07:04Now all we have to do is reset the clock.

0:07:10 > 0:07:14- Aahhh!- I don't suppose either of you is an expert clockmaker?

0:07:14 > 0:07:19No. I'm just a simple popcorn machine. Ruuh, ruuh...uhhhhhh...!

0:07:19 > 0:07:21Is it time to cry yet? cos I'm ready.

0:07:21 > 0:07:23We clearly can't alter this clock

0:07:23 > 0:07:27and we've lost a chunk of exam study time, so I say tears are in order.

0:07:27 > 0:07:28Here's one now.

0:07:28 > 0:07:30Wait! We're going to do what I always do

0:07:30 > 0:07:34when faced with a complex, difficult-to-solve problem.

0:07:34 > 0:07:37We're going to stare it squarely in the face...

0:07:40 > 0:07:46..and say, "I'm going to ignore you and find some other way to do this."

0:07:46 > 0:07:48Ooh, I like this!

0:07:50 > 0:07:52So when I wound the clock back 15 minutes,

0:07:52 > 0:07:55time itself went back 15 minutes.

0:07:55 > 0:07:58So if I can figure out how to set the clock back to

0:07:58 > 0:08:01right before Abercrombie caught us... Templeton! Bad!

0:08:01 > 0:08:05But how will I know how it works if I don't take it apart and break it?

0:08:08 > 0:08:10Oh...!

0:08:10 > 0:08:12Uh!

0:08:12 > 0:08:15Hey, a key! That's it!

0:08:22 > 0:08:24Uh, oh...ahhh!

0:08:26 > 0:08:29Let's go change history!

0:08:34 > 0:08:38And she fell right on her big fat bottom!

0:08:38 > 0:08:39That's so sad!

0:08:39 > 0:08:41And funny!

0:08:41 > 0:08:44Yo, check out my flash new medallion!

0:08:44 > 0:08:46Do you even know who Malcolm X was?

0:08:46 > 0:08:50Of course! He was a great civil rights leader in the '60s. Innit!

0:08:50 > 0:08:53So we somehow made Bishop smarter?

0:08:53 > 0:08:56Hmm, a most unfortunate side-effect.

0:08:56 > 0:08:59Listen, we have to be very, very careful.

0:08:59 > 0:09:02All we need to do is not repeat our mistakes and we're home for...

0:09:02 > 0:09:08- Argh!- Samia, advance warning, might want to put your brakes on.

0:09:08 > 0:09:11Merci, Mitchell! Je veux un gateau.

0:09:15 > 0:09:19Yeah, yeah, all the exams are on Friday. Get over it.

0:09:19 > 0:09:21Ahhhhh...!

0:09:21 > 0:09:24Ah ha ha ha ha!

0:09:24 > 0:09:26Doof! Ah!

0:09:26 > 0:09:29Wooaaahh!

0:09:29 > 0:09:30Argh!

0:09:32 > 0:09:33Hah-hah!

0:09:34 > 0:09:37Hmm. Carry on.

0:09:37 > 0:09:39Do you see what this means?

0:09:39 > 0:09:41We have a time machine.

0:09:41 > 0:09:45Think of all the cool and amazing things we could do with it!

0:09:45 > 0:09:47N-n-nope. I've got nothing.

0:09:47 > 0:09:52Huh! Well, I can think of 99 things! And you know what number one is?

0:09:52 > 0:09:55I want to see me some dinosaurs!

0:09:58 > 0:10:01How many...how many more turns now?

0:10:01 > 0:10:04Well, assuming we need to travel back 65 million years to see

0:10:04 > 0:10:07a dinosaur - you only need to turn the hands of the clock

0:10:07 > 0:10:13another 47 billion, 449 million, 999 thousand, 998 times.

0:10:13 > 0:10:15And how many have I done?

0:10:15 > 0:10:16Two.

0:10:16 > 0:10:21Uh! What I wouldn't do for a nice big bronto-burger.

0:10:21 > 0:10:25- I'm hungry. When's lunch? - Not for another hour.

0:10:25 > 0:10:28Lunch isn't an hour away! Not any more!

0:10:28 > 0:10:30We have a time machine!

0:10:30 > 0:10:34Cool-thing-to-do-with-it number 2 - have lunch any time we want!

0:10:34 > 0:10:40I'd love a chocolate swirly log, but they only serve those on Tuesdays.

0:10:40 > 0:10:43- Today's Monday.- Not any more!

0:10:49 > 0:10:52# If you could travel through time Where would you go?

0:10:52 > 0:10:56# Into the distant future or the past long ago?

0:10:56 > 0:11:00# Change the whole world or just your life on its own

0:11:00 > 0:11:04# Pick a year, pick a day Pick a time, let's go. #

0:11:04 > 0:11:05BURP!

0:11:05 > 0:11:08This time machine is quite filling.

0:11:08 > 0:11:12I'm not sure I can keep running up and down those tower stairs.

0:11:12 > 0:11:14I'm 70% chocolate log.

0:11:14 > 0:11:17But we need to go to Mr Balding's history study class to study history

0:11:17 > 0:11:20for Mr Balding's history exam for Mr Balding's history class...

0:11:20 > 0:11:24Oh, sorry, got stuck on a chocolate log loop. Burp!

0:11:24 > 0:11:27- Hm.- I have an idea!

0:11:27 > 0:11:30Man, it's amazing how hard my brain works to avoid work.

0:11:30 > 0:11:33Mr Balding's painfully slowwww, right?

0:11:33 > 0:11:35- Yes.- What if...

0:11:35 > 0:11:40Of course, the only thing more interesting than

0:11:40 > 0:11:47the history of bread... is the history of butter.

0:11:47 > 0:11:50Three, two, one... ALARM CLOCK RINGS

0:11:55 > 0:11:57- SPEECH IS SPEEDED UP - Now butter is formed...

0:11:57 > 0:12:01- That's more like it!- But Mitchell, are we learning anything?

0:12:01 > 0:12:03I'm learning how to enjoy history class.

0:12:03 > 0:12:05BELL RINGS

0:12:05 > 0:12:11And that is the history of butter, in its entirety.

0:12:13 > 0:12:15Have a good day.

0:12:15 > 0:12:21Yes! On to...number 38 - fun with Abercrombie!

0:12:21 > 0:12:25Exam week! Exam week!

0:12:25 > 0:12:29If you're not panicking, you're not taking it seriously enough!

0:12:29 > 0:12:32You there - why aren't you panicking?!

0:12:32 > 0:12:36Sorry, sir! Just taking a breather. Ha ha ha ha! Ooo hoo, ooh hoo hoo!

0:12:36 > 0:12:38That's more like it!

0:12:47 > 0:12:49Heh heh heh!

0:12:51 > 0:12:54MACHINERY CLATTERS

0:12:54 > 0:12:59We must treat exam time with the utmost seriousness!

0:12:59 > 0:13:01THEY LAUGH

0:13:02 > 0:13:05What's so funny? Do I entertain you?

0:13:05 > 0:13:08Yes! Yes, you do.

0:13:08 > 0:13:11While I really do enjoy Funky-disco-crombie,

0:13:11 > 0:13:13we can't keep putting off studying.

0:13:13 > 0:13:16There's only two days left till all our exams!

0:13:16 > 0:13:18Hmmm. "Put off," eh?

0:13:25 > 0:13:27No peeking! And...

0:13:27 > 0:13:29open!

0:13:29 > 0:13:33Where are we? When are we?

0:13:33 > 0:13:38The future! Midnight on the day the exams finish.

0:13:38 > 0:13:41- What?- The security system goes down at midnight.

0:13:41 > 0:13:44We can just take all the answers to the questions!

0:13:44 > 0:13:47But that's...CHEATING!

0:13:47 > 0:13:49It's not cheating if the exams are already over.

0:13:49 > 0:13:52Plus, this is the future. Cheating might be legal by now.

0:13:52 > 0:13:56Mitchell Tanner, I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU!

0:13:56 > 0:14:00I AM NEVER SPEAKING TO YOU AGAIN!

0:14:00 > 0:14:03Hold that thought. Come on, Templeton.

0:14:03 > 0:14:06If this IS the future, I might have rocket shoes.

0:14:06 > 0:14:10Rocket shoes engage! NNNNNNN!

0:14:10 > 0:14:12No.

0:14:16 > 0:14:20Beezers! If Mitchell was here, and he's not,

0:14:20 > 0:14:23and if I was still talking to him, and I'm not,

0:14:23 > 0:14:26I'd tell him how much trouble we're in. Hold up!

0:14:31 > 0:14:36- Why are you wearing a fake moustache? - So I can blend in.

0:14:39 > 0:14:40SNIFFS

0:14:40 > 0:14:43Huh! I smell trouble.

0:14:43 > 0:14:47Either that or it's the remnants of today's Halibut Supreme.

0:14:47 > 0:14:50Or is it Halibut Surprise?

0:14:52 > 0:14:55The moment it hits midnight...

0:14:55 > 0:14:56Eh, heh heh heh!

0:15:02 > 0:15:05Oh! Pretty.

0:15:05 > 0:15:07Ahhh!

0:15:17 > 0:15:19Aaaaarrgghhh!

0:15:20 > 0:15:21Aha!

0:15:24 > 0:15:27Intruder alert!

0:15:27 > 0:15:30Stop those humanoids!

0:15:36 > 0:15:40Why do they have blast doors at a school?

0:15:40 > 0:15:43As a precaution against the lunchroom's goulash?

0:15:48 > 0:15:49No!

0:15:52 > 0:15:55There's no choice. To the clock tower!

0:15:55 > 0:16:00I never realised that time travel could be so exhausting!

0:16:00 > 0:16:04- Ahhhhhhh! - He's coming up the stairs!

0:16:04 > 0:16:08Just pray it's some sort of hideous monster and not Abercrombie.

0:16:08 > 0:16:10- There's a difference? - Out of the way!

0:16:12 > 0:16:14Hnh!

0:16:17 > 0:16:19Ah-hah!

0:16:21 > 0:16:23DRILL WHIRS

0:16:39 > 0:16:43- Wahhhh! - This is clearly a very bad thing!

0:16:43 > 0:16:44Hold on!

0:16:48 > 0:16:50Waaaaarrggghhh!

0:16:51 > 0:16:53Ooofff!

0:16:53 > 0:16:56Whoops. On the plus side, I don't hear Abercrombie.

0:16:56 > 0:17:00If there even is an Abercrombie! Our new headmaster could be a robot!

0:17:00 > 0:17:04Or a caveman! I hope caveman, cos it'd be funnier.

0:17:04 > 0:17:06MACHINERY CLATTERS, CLOCK CHIMES

0:17:12 > 0:17:15We did it! We're back where we were!

0:17:15 > 0:17:18We got three days to prep for exams and I've got the answers.

0:17:18 > 0:17:21'All pupils to the hall for the first exam.

0:17:21 > 0:17:24'The first exam begins in five minutes.

0:17:24 > 0:17:27'Oh, ha ha! I'm sorry, four minutes. Ah, ha ha!'

0:17:27 > 0:17:33- What?- Ahhh... We must have messed up our re-entry - it's exam day!

0:17:33 > 0:17:37I haven't studied and I'm going to fail and the only university

0:17:37 > 0:17:39I'll get into is clown college and I'll have to be one of those

0:17:39 > 0:17:42clowns whose trousers fall down but it's going to be fine

0:17:42 > 0:17:45because clowns are a respected profession these days, right?

0:17:45 > 0:17:46Please tell me it's so!

0:17:46 > 0:17:50There's nothing more respected on earth than a trouserless clown.

0:17:59 > 0:18:02You have one hour, so don't mess up.

0:18:02 > 0:18:06Unless you have your sights set on being a school teacher.

0:18:06 > 0:18:07You may begin.

0:18:10 > 0:18:13Time's up. Please stop writing.

0:18:13 > 0:18:17What? No, wait! That was hardly any time at all!

0:18:17 > 0:18:21Mitchell, you've had the same time as everyone else.

0:18:21 > 0:18:23The same time?

0:18:23 > 0:18:26My, this is taking a while.

0:18:26 > 0:18:28Becky!

0:18:28 > 0:18:31Goo? Bethany Goo. Huh-huh!

0:18:31 > 0:18:34Templeton! Whoa!

0:18:34 > 0:18:37You have one hour. You may begin.

0:18:37 > 0:18:38What?!

0:18:38 > 0:18:41No! This cannot be happening!

0:18:44 > 0:18:46Time's up. Please stop writing.

0:18:46 > 0:18:50This exam is taking for ever, dearie.

0:18:50 > 0:18:54Waaahh, wahhh, I'm terribly sad. Wahh, wahhh!

0:18:54 > 0:18:56We've got to get out of here!

0:18:56 > 0:18:59You have one hour. You may begin.

0:19:01 > 0:19:03Goo goo!

0:19:05 > 0:19:09'In three, two, one... In three, two, one...'

0:19:09 > 0:19:13Mitchell, honey, I do believe you've broken time.

0:19:13 > 0:19:15Then I have to find a way to fix it!

0:19:15 > 0:19:18Not to worry you, but I'm getting older.

0:19:18 > 0:19:22And I think that baby whose name I've forgotten is getting younger.

0:19:22 > 0:19:25We don't have much time.

0:19:25 > 0:19:27We've got to get to school first!

0:19:27 > 0:19:30It's us!

0:19:30 > 0:19:34Wait! It's the first day! The first time I turned the clock back!

0:19:34 > 0:19:38Oh, I remember that. Oh, the good old days!

0:19:38 > 0:19:42- If I can get up there before... well, before- I- do...

0:19:42 > 0:19:46and stop myself turning the clock back that very first time,

0:19:46 > 0:19:48I could stop all this from ever happening!

0:19:48 > 0:19:50# Da da, da ding-ya da da... #

0:19:50 > 0:19:53He either agrees or he needs changing.

0:19:53 > 0:19:56Good enough for me! Here!

0:19:59 > 0:20:01Mitchell! STOP!

0:20:04 > 0:20:07No time to explain! No time at all!

0:20:07 > 0:20:09OK, second Mitchell.

0:20:11 > 0:20:13Mitchell! MITCHELL!

0:20:18 > 0:20:24MITCHELL! Whatever you do, DON'T TOUCH THE HANDS!

0:20:24 > 0:20:25What?

0:20:25 > 0:20:28It's me! I'm you from the future!

0:20:28 > 0:20:31Don't touch that clock, darn it!

0:20:31 > 0:20:34Wow. Future me's got kind of an attitude problem.

0:20:34 > 0:20:38No. I...you...

0:20:39 > 0:20:45We have to stop time falling apart, to save Becky and Templeton!

0:20:45 > 0:20:47I have no idea what I'm talking about,

0:20:47 > 0:20:52but I seem to be pretty persuasive. OK! How?

0:20:52 > 0:20:54Aaargh!

0:20:54 > 0:20:55Don't do it!

0:20:55 > 0:21:00I think...I think you'd better let me drop!

0:21:00 > 0:21:02What is THAT?

0:21:02 > 0:21:08I said, I think we were never supposed to meet, let alone touch!

0:21:09 > 0:21:11Wahhhhhhh!

0:21:14 > 0:21:16EXPLOSION

0:21:16 > 0:21:17Warrghhhhhhhh!

0:21:21 > 0:21:23Warrghhhhhhhh!

0:21:23 > 0:21:26Are we...do you think we're...?

0:21:27 > 0:21:30- Hello, friends!- And we're back.

0:21:30 > 0:21:34- I think...I think it might be easier if I just studied this time.- Oh, yes.

0:21:34 > 0:21:38This time round, it's time I left time alone.

0:21:43 > 0:21:44Little help here...

0:21:44 > 0:21:49# If you could travel through time, where would you go?

0:21:49 > 0:21:53# Into the distant future or the past long ago?

0:21:53 > 0:21:57# Pick a year, pick a day, pick a time let's go. #

0:21:57 > 0:21:59Subtitles by Red Bee Media Ltd